OCT MAILER Results (spoiler)

Posted: Fri Nov 05, 2021 11:13 am

Consortium Results for 39 warriors.

Champs 13-9-0 (1 of 7-3)
Adep 4-9-0-1
Init 12-7-1-1 (1 of 7-3)
Appr 36-36-1-1
Rook 33-21-0-1 (2 of 7-3, 1 of 8-3*, 1 of 9-3*)
TVs =Aimed Blow and Slasher

Dead Chal 14-9-1 (1 of 7-3-1)
Dead Cham 7-3-0 (1 of 7-3)
Dead Adep 12-6-0 (1 of 7-3)
Dead Init 8-9-0
Dead Appr 9-7-0-1

Live Tourneys 98-82-2-4 = .544
Dead Tourneys 50-34-1-1 = .595
All Tourneys 148-116-3-5 = .561 mediocre to respectable)

2 TVs (5.1% awards - weak)
7 of 7-3's (just couldn't pull 'em over the hump)

ArchMaster Poster Joined: Apr 15, 2004 Posts: 2957

I detailed my roster and planning in another thread. I sent 88 total, 44 of which were Rookies. I highlighted a few of my best chances to TC and this is how they did:

I was excited about CADAVER DOG in Challengers, after his 7-3, 7-3, and 11-3 performances in the last three tournies. Naturally, he went 4-3! I did, however, get one TV in the class with FIFTH-RATE. It is her second consecutive 9-3 performance and she isn't even 50 FE yet, so I am excited to see what the future brings.

ARENAMUSTARD in Adepts was one of my big hopefuls as well, in his first tourney after his Apprentices TC and after getting his -4 Dec fixed. He went 4-3, too. He started out 4-0 and looked really good, then got beat by two DA wielding Strikers and a LU. Knack: 1, Right Place Right Time: 1. I look forward to his Champions run in 2022 for the tiebreaker on that debate.

And then there was Rookies. I had been scrimping and saving my Rookies for this tourney when I thought the class might go overlooked, and I hoped I had enough to get my first TC in the class. 44 entered, and 6 made it to round 11: 3 ABs, 2 LUs, and 1 ST. Five of them were natural warriors rolled up from my old team sheets, and one was the clone that I made with my April MI prize. The ABs faded first. TSEEN FOO, a 10-10-13-17-9-4-21 AB, was the first to drop out at 8-3. In the next round, both HADAR (11-13-8-17-10-4-21 AB) and BOTEIN (11-10-5-11-17-5-21 AB) exited at 9-3. My clone was the next to be eliminated, but by then, there were only two warriors remaining, both mine.

It was DALIM, a 17-11-8-21-9-7-11 ST at 14-1-1, vs TUREIS, a 12-15-7-17-17-5-11 LU at 13-2. In both fights DALIM came out swinging with his SC, hitting TUREIS repeatedly, but between the plate armor, a few dodges, and a lucky parry, TUREIS was able to withstand the beating, steal the initiative, and win. In the end, TUREIS, a completely natural and very ordinary looking warrior won me my first Rookies TC.

It is both neat and surprising that my plan worked. The newsletter says that there were 207 fights in the first round, so that makes 413 or 414 Rookies, which was about my guess as to how many there would be. Perhaps I underrated my chances, or more likely, I just got lucky. Either way, I am happy to have conquered Rookies at least once.

As for the rest of the tourney, it was one of my better showings in a long time. My 88 entries went 315-264-11-4 and earned me 1 TC, 1 RU, 8 living TVs, and 1 dead TV, along with 7 stylemasters.

I had some other pleasant surprises in the tourney (besides Rookies):

- SPARE ANCHOR, my TP, got a second TV in Contenders, a class dominated by ABs.

- While only one of my six bust-outs made the newsletter, it was the unlikely SIGMA LUPI, the 50 FE single-21 PS bust-out in Freshmen.

- I sent my entire Turf War team to prepare for the final round of the contest, and not only did they all live, but one of them TV'd.

- I ran HAM BURGLAR in Primus for old times' sake using his weapon against other ABs, and he managed to beat JANET RENO, one of TMM's perfect ones.

The tourney was tremendously enjoyable, not least of which because I splurged on FedEx and read it on my day off on Friday. Congrats to everyone who won something, and to those who didn't, I hope next tourney goes better.

With work being very busy and travel being less fun than normal, I suspect I won't be in Tempe this year, but I'll send some warriors along to keep you company. To those who are making the trip, I hope you have fun. I will do my best to give you some tougher competition when April rolls around.

Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2021 12:50 am

Nice, OAB!

Phbbbbt to your Turf War Team results!

One Armed Bandit wrote:

I detailed my roster and planning in another thread. I sent 88 total, 44 of which were Rookies. I highlighted a few of my best chances to TC and this is how they did:

I was excited about CADAVER DOG in Challengers, after his 7-3, 7-3, and 11-3 performances in the last three tournies. Naturally, he went 4-3! I did, however, get one TV in the class with FIFTH-RATE. It is her second consecutive 9-3 performance and she isn't even 50 FE yet, so I am excited to see what the future brings.

ARENAMUSTARD in Adepts was one of my big hopefuls as well, in his first tourney after his Apprentices TC and after getting his -4 Dec fixed. He went 4-3, too. He started out 4-0 and looked really good, then got beat by two DA wielding Strikers and a LU. Knack: 1, Right Place Right Time: 1. I look forward to his Champions run in 2022 for the tiebreaker on that debate.

And then there was Rookies. I had been scrimping and saving my Rookies for this tourney when I thought the class might go overlooked, and I hoped I had enough to get my first TC in the class. 44 entered, and 6 made it to round 11: 3 ABs, 2 LUs, and 1 ST. Five of them were natural warriors rolled up from my old team sheets, and one was the clone that I made with my April MI prize. The ABs faded first. TSEEN FOO, a 10-10-13-17-9-4-21 AB, was the first to drop out at 8-3. In the next round, both HADAR (11-13-8-17-10-4-21 AB) and BOTEIN (11-10-5-11-17-5-21 AB) exited at 9-3. My clone was the next to be eliminated, but by then, there were only two warriors remaining, both mine.

It was DALIM, a 17-11-8-21-9-7-11 ST at 14-1-1, vs TUREIS, a 12-15-7-17-17-5-11 LU at 13-2. In both fights DALIM came out swinging with his SC, hitting TUREIS repeatedly, but between the plate armor, a few dodges, and a lucky parry, TUREIS was able to withstand the beating, steal the initiative, and win. In the end, TUREIS, a completely natural and very ordinary looking warrior won me my first Rookies TC.

It is both neat and surprising that my plan worked. The newsletter says that there were 207 fights in the first round, so that makes 413 or 414 Rookies, which was about my guess as to how many there would be. Perhaps I underrated my chances, or more likely, I just got lucky. Either way, I am happy to have conquered Rookies at least once.

As for the rest of the tourney, it was one of my better showings in a long time. My 88 entries went 315-264-11-4 and earned me 1 TC, 1 RU, 8 living TVs, and 1 dead TV, along with 7 stylemasters.

I had some other pleasant surprises in the tourney (besides Rookies):

- SPARE ANCHOR, my TP, got a second TV in Contenders, a class dominated by ABs.

- While only one of my six bust-outs made the newsletter, it was the unlikely SIGMA LUPI, the 50 FE single-21 PS bust-out in Freshmen.

- I sent my entire Turf War team to prepare for the final round of the contest, and not only did they all live, but one of them TV'd.

- I ran HAM BURGLAR in Primus for old times' sake using his weapon against other ABs, and he managed to beat JANET RENO, one of TMM's perfect ones.

The tourney was tremendously enjoyable, not least of which because I splurged on FedEx and read it on my day off on Friday. Congrats to everyone who won something, and to those who didn't, I hope next tourney goes better.

With work being very busy and travel being less fun than normal, I suspect I won't be in Tempe this year, but I'll send some warriors along to keep you company. To those who are making the trip, I hope you have fun. I will do my best to give you some tougher competition when April rolls around.

Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2021 9:03 pm

I don't usually post on these threads, because I don't send many warriors in these days, and they usually all suck anyways, as I am definitely NOT a tourney manager.

That said, I sent in like 15 or 16, almost all dead, mostly from 21. Was very happy to get my second ever warrior back from the dead! Tendril went 7-3 last Halloween in adepts and at 22FE didn't think he had a shot at all but sent him in for some reason anyway. Went 8-3-1 and will soon be terrorizing Sunset once again! Had several other dead do well at 5-3 or 4-3 to set themselves up for another shot maybe next year.

Congrats OAB on the rookies TC!

ArchMaster Poster Joined: Apr 15, 2004 Posts: 2957

Congrats on the Dead TV, Stik! That is very cool.

Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2021 11:32 am

I had a super fun tourney. I decided to read it in three sittings, because reading fatigue causes you not to enjoy the later warriors as much.

Reading #1:
Contenders:
My two bashers only won a single fight, which is below average. It was actually enough to win the stylemaster prize, though. The other two warriors I sent for development got 3 trains. SO all positive.

Eligibles:
Gad went 6-3. The rest were terrible.

ADM:
This was where my first real hope was. I had a weak busting basher and knew there were a LOT of slashers busting, which made Ruth's chances slightly higher. The basher got no trains until his elimination turn and bowed out at 4-3. Not terrible, but not what I hoped for, either. Ruth drew 3 AB's in the first 4 turns and I'm happy she is 3-1, but wondering what the rest of the tourney will bring. Connie broke through Ruth's defenses on R9 and Ruth entered the runoffs on the bubble. She got through three busting warriors, but then Gibson ended her tourney. (Ruth did go 3-0 vs the busting SL's)

Reading #2
Freshmen:
None of my current Freshmen are standing out. The most consistent , R-1, went 7-3 again.

Challengers:
After R4, I only have Priscilla left (though the two TW warriors both survived and learned well). Priscilla took her first loss on T7 and then started a winning streak. On R13, my heart is beating faster and I'm thinking, "This is a nice run." A loss on R13, but I know it is nearing the end. Priscilla pulls the stand in and.... One E. Scribe opens with a crit, knocks Priscilla down, and proceeds to end her tourney! Not the way you want a warrior to go out. I was glad it was tied for 4th place and not 3rd place, but still a sad ending.

Champions:
This was easily my best chance in the tourney. Guy 'n Anne had gone 10-3 at 21FE in April and I was hoping for an improvement. She looked mostly stellar in the 10-3 run. I had made one minor strat adjustment.
My other champs were bland and performed likewise. Fights of note in Guy 'n Anne's run:
T4: LU - 2 clashes, G. takes init and sends the warrior desperate. 4 attacks later, the lunger ripostes and hits G. twice in 7 attacks (G. is desperate). G. ripostes and finishes the fight.
T6: ST - 7 clashes, G. wins the decise battle and fight
T7: ST (Crackle) - 1 clash, C. wins the decise battle and opens with a knockdown crit and finishes G. off on the ground.
T9: ST (Shatterstar) - 3 clashes and SS wins the init, but can't hit in 3 attacks (1 crit). G. ripostes and crits to the head and goes into the death subroutine.
T10: LU - 1 clash, G. misses, LU ripostes and hits twice. LU crits, but G. dodges and ripostes and wins the fight.
T11: Scribe: No upset this time...
T12: LU (SS) - G. opens with a crit and sends SS desperate. SS ripostes and hits three times on 7 normal attacks misses on 1 crit. G. ripostes and misses with a normal, SS ripostes and misses with a normal. G. ripostes once more and crits to end the fight.
<This is not the way G. devastated her opponents in April in the 10 wins>
T13: LU (Darkfire) - G. crits, D dodges and hits 3 times, knocking G. down and then finishing the fight.
T14: AB (One Man Fury) - G. crits and misses, OMF dodges and hits G. once and G.'s scimitar once. G. crits and sends OMF desperate. G. misses with a normal and OMF hits G.'s scimitar again and gives up.
T15: LU (Darkfire) - G. opens with a normal and D. dodges and ripostes. 5 normals (1 hit) and 1 crit (miss) later, G. steals the init (without riposting) and 1 shot crits Darkfire to win Champs.

Guy 'n Anne: 12-8(1)-7-21-21-5-11 PS (created with rainbow prize).
She follows the use a high wit-will setup on a PS and have it out-learn the competition pattern of success with a PS.

Apprentices-Rookies:
6 warriors, nothing really to report.

All five of my TW warriors returned with extra skills!

Reading 3:
I had 62 dead warriors going. I enjoy the dead tourney and send a lot of warriors and have few expectations. I did NOT expect to see 11 of them die again.
Dead Challengers:
Pretty random as usual. Got one knacky striker back. I am expecting Samson back soon, but she just missed at 7-3. One of my favorite warriors to run died for the 12th time in this tourney. So much fun watching this warrior die year after year. (and while frail (4 cn, 15 sz, 12 wl), it doesn't look like it'd die a dozen times, either)

Dead Champions:
I had no clue I'd see the success I saw here:
Weak Story - a high WT-WL fast learning PS TV'd
Road Kill - a double 21 SL got 9 wins and died (fortunately 8+ wins and death still gets you back from the dead).
Yellow Teeth - 9(2)-5(2)-14-15-21-3-21 PR had a super fun 6-3 result.
Corn Flakes - 9-4-10-15-4-21-21 AB defense learn +4 defense somehow started 7-0, but couldn't win #8.

Dead Adepts:
I had hopes for a 19FE double 21. This class just prepped all the warriors for next year.

Dead Initiates:
All the warriors I really wanted back prepped for next year's dead tourney.
A surprise showing by a 6FE hybrid PS to 9-3. Ended the tourney with 5 expert ratings.

Dead Apprentices:
Only 3 warriors. All three will still be in dead apprentices next year.

All in all a fantastic tourney for me.
The prize, of course, is TCing with style #6 (and the worst style in the game, PS)

It was clearly a PS tourney for me, with 2 others coming back from the dead.

104 sent, 270-306 (46.88%), 1 TC, 2 TV's, 4 dead TV's
My previous TC was April of 2019. It feels like longer, though, because I've seen multiple RU's and deep finishes in that time.

Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2021 2:00 pm

Stik wrote:

I don't usually post on these threads, because I don't send many warriors in these days, and they usually all suck anyways, as I am definitely NOT a tourney manager.

That said, I sent in like 15 or 16, almost all dead, mostly from 21. Was very happy to get my second ever warrior back from the dead! Tendril went 7-3 last Halloween in adepts and at 22FE didn't think he had a shot at all but sent him in for some reason anyway. Went 8-3-1 and will soon be terrorizing Sunset once again! Had several other dead do well at 5-3 or 4-3 to set themselves up for another shot maybe next year.

Congrats OAB on the rookies TC!

Way to go, Stik!

Advanced Expert Poster Joined: Jul 15, 2014 Posts: 192

Welcome to the John Madden Memorial version of the Monday Morning Tourney Quarterback (JMMMMTQB)! Let’s roll the tape!

Quotes of the week

"The only yardstick for success our society has is being a champion. No one remembers anything else." – John Madden

My, my, my…. This was something of an “also ran” tourney with two runners up and two 3rd place finishers. On the dexter side of the equation, it was fantastic to go so deep on multiple occasions. On the sinister, well, what John said.

Let's look at the live side first:

My New Suit, a ST who had failed to TV in rooks through inits, was sitting pretty at 11-1 in Adepts only to be put out, and rightly so I might add, by the ultimate TC, TMM’s Shout and runner up, DMob’s Zekken, from whom he also took his first loss.

Bianca On The Boom was absolutely one of my tourney favorites going in to the Apps tournament. A SL with a damage bonus, decise learns, and rugged good looks, he had it all. Where he struggled was Wastes. He ripped off 9 initial wins, including 3 over ST’s, then took a loss from the Waste Sky Comma. A win against an OAB warrior and then he was stopped in his tracks by another Waste in Wile E. Coyote. He had secured a TV by this point, but he certainly looked to be on his way out. But then he went on a tear (pronounced “tair” not “teer”), putting out a TEABAG ally ST, a DMob TP in Coraku and a LU in Wickersham. Round 16 brought a Convicted Thief standby and I thought, “Holy crap, I might make the finals!”. Sure enough, Round 17 brought around Wickersham again and I suspected this was it. Having beaten him previously, I had high hopes going in. But this time, Angus’ LU dodged the first critical swing and things went downhill from there. Grats to Angus on his TC!

My dead tourney was arguably an unmitigated disaster. From Challengers to Champs to Adepts to Inits, not a single warrior made it back. That left Dead Apps:

My Striker, You Bot 8000 Puts made it to round 11 and a resurrection with just one loss to a ChiefI LU, who cheats by using the Response tactic with his LU’s. You heard it here first. He, meaning Bot not ChiefI, won five more fights just to get owned by a JE lunger. Wasn't that guy quitting? During that run of five wins, the round 13 fight brought a tDO striker in Dirty Water. A three line clash for Decise and Dirty Water came out swinging but a critical dodge from You Bot and an apropos rippo, if you will, ended that fight, putting the second loss on Dirty Water. I flipped over that fight to find Bot facing Dirty Water again. Was this the finals?! Awesome, cause I just beat this chump! Sadly, Bot did not dodge the first Dirty swing this time and went out at 11-3.

In parallel, My Best Laid Plans, an Aimed Blow, had also seen some success after losing his first fight, getting to round ten only to lose his second to Lou’s Bodyguard while achieving resurrection nonetheless. Round eleven saw a win against Dirty Water, giving tDO’s warrior his first loss. A few more wins and Round 14 saw a matchup against Mordant Deserter. Oh snap. I think he just made the finals! Sure enough, Round 15 saw Dirty Water standing nervously across the sands again. Having beaten him pretty soundly earlier and also having put both Dirty’s losses on him overall, this seemed a pretty good shot at a Dead TC and immortality. Once again, Best Laid Plans dodged and took control of the fight, sending Dirty desperate. But this time, Dirty’s desperation strategy managed a crit swing and hit which in turn sent BLP desperate. A quick dodge from BLP and suddenly Dirty was wheezing (after 6 attacks, no less!). While DW was resting at the end of Minute 1, BLP took another swing but it was dodged. Feeling pretty good about the fight thus far, Minute 2 began like an Eminem song with “but hold your nose cause here goes the cold water” when Dirty Water led with a crit and put BLP out in the Runner Up spot. This ultimately left You Bot tied for 3rd place.

““Boom! He’s on his back!” – John Madden

My favorite to TC for the entire tourney was My Sealed Lips, a 9-7-9-21-17-14-7 SL who was blessed in INI, RIP, ATT, damage and manhood. He came into the Champions contest having gone 7-3 in Apps, 10-3 in Inits, and 11-3-1 in Adepts. Sure enough, after a single round 3 loss to a JE Striker – those decise battles with Strikers are always tricky – MSL rolled into a Riff Raff Striker to secure his 3rd Tourney Victor status at 9-1. Round 11, enter One Man Fury, a Doc Steele size 3 AB with large hands. No problem, I thought. With AMAS ATT, MSL should be able to make short work of this guy. And while my slasher was able to send the Good Doctor’s warrior desperate multiple times, that was about all she wrote on that sheet of music. Except for the coda where One Man Fury sent My Sealed Lips to his grave.

“I respect coaches. I respect what good coaches do. I know that you don’t learn to be a coach in an hour and a half.” -- John Madden

Seven years back into this game and every day is still a learning experience, particularly from talking to and being beaten by the consistently great managers. I’ve come along as a manager but there’s always another challenge to be better.

Awards of the week

In all, Team Vlad managed 12 awards for an award percentage of a little over 8%. As Runner Up, Bianca On The Boom won a set of Wiggler Bass Lures™ but fell just short of the highly coveted Wiggler Personal Massager™.

The TV’s crossed a plethora of styles, including Aimed Blow, Bashing, Lunging, Slashing, Wall of Steel and, under Floyd’s Theory of Tourney Optimization™, three Strikers.

Stats of the week

I have adopted the view that the All Saints Eve tourney is really two tourneys. One live, one dead. Accordingly, I entered a goodly number of warriors on both sides of the grave as if each were its own tourney. I use the fact that I am not paying for a flight or hotel to justify this. Overall, the team managed a 501-425-10-9 record or just over 54%. Dead and Live sides were both pretty representative of the final win percentage. I also picked up 7 Stylemasters, though a few of those were in the Tourney of the Dead which I presume means nothing.

Best style: Slashers at 61%. This is gratifying, given how poorly I have historically managed slashers!

Worst Style: Every year or two I dust off a PL. And every year or two it makes my Worst Style list. In this instance, in partnership with the Parry Strike style because Parry Strikes. Both landed at 25%.

Best Class: Challengers, a class where I am something of a novice, landed at 61%.

Worst Class: ADM at 40%, followed closely by Inits at 43%.

Factoids that may only interest me

I. Out of 12 awards, only 2 had a WL lower than 15. Two of them had at least one kill which perhaps contradicts my assertion that kill desire loses fights. I still stand by that assertion, by the by.

II. After filtering out the Tourney of the Dead deaths, all of my fatalities were in Rooks except My Sealed Lips mentioned above. This is probably for the best.

III. I am finding myself running more and more untimed warriors in tourneys. This batch went a collective 52% with only a single 0-3 so I guess that’s decent.

Mr. United Global Services Member Travel Note

This upcoming trip to Tempe for the Face to Face – if Omnicron doesn’t derail it – will mark the first time I have flown since Covid hit in March of 2020. Almost two years later, it will be surreal to board a flight again after two years having, effectively, commuted to work by airplane for a number of years prior to that. The flight callous has worn off and I’m frankly dreading it. I am bringing BoV as an emotional support companion because she plays a mean game of golf. At least one of us does!

Brief truths

A. Losing to Angus for the Apps championship was the best part of the tourney for me. Watching Gentle Ben call his shot and nail the ADM tournament was a close second.

B. Winning your first tourney fight is auspicious, regardless of class.

C. Sadness is seeing your first TMM opponent when your warrior is already on the bubble. Happiness is putting the first loss on Bob in Challengers.

D. Having your 14FE basher stomp through the Adepts class for a 9-3 Tourney Victor and Stylemaster, to land perfectly on 20FE, feels like nailing the Triple Lundy.

Ten things I think I think

1. I think I didn’t know what to think when my tourney box was adorned with a “HAL” sticker.

2. I think breaking even in Eligibles in my first effort for the class felt pretty sweet. I think the higher the class, the better it feels to take a win off a manager you respect, even if it was prolly one of their scrubs. I think my Grandmaster ATT warrior couldn’t hit the Aimed Blows and I had better get used to that frustration.

3. I think I loved that Superior Snotling’s race is…. Snotling.

4. I think Watson still doesn’t like a loss. I think losing to Watson in ADM was ironic.

5. I think I will really miss reporting whether The Otto giveth or taketh away for any given tourney. RIP.

6. I think I will need to pay more attention to warriors who can’t seem to draw a backup to save their fight, tourney or even life.

7. I think, whether I like it or not, I am slowly building an army of dead Challengers which will eventually be live Challengers. I think I better figure out how one goes about that smartly.

8. I think I gleefully Orange Sheet Slid™ a freshman fight which was a rematch between tDO’s basher Armageddon and my Miguel where the latter had won a previous Champs matchup for the basher stylemaster pot. I think I cackled evilly when I saw his basher had landed that sweet war flail as his fave. I think I wept bitter tears when his basher whupped my basher’s butt with the whiffle. Typical tDO.

9. I think I was scratching my head when coming across a Weirdo warrior in round three who was 0-2. I think I was not confused that he was 0-2 – this being a Weirdo warrior after all – but rather how he was still in the tourney when you were supposed to have to win one of your first two fights to proceed to round 3. I think the announcement lied.

10. I think these are the other things I think this week:

a. I think I love the “Get a life!” jeer in the Tourney of the Dead.

b. I think two fights into rooks with matches against two OAB warriors meant rooks was going to be a long haul.

c. I think it is pretty dang hard to scum a Doc Steele striker.

d. I think when your fine Frosh FI AB gets hit in the first fight by the first lame regular swing from a lame parry-strike of all things, it is disheartening. I think it is embarrassing when you discover he wasn’t even using his fave strat as intended.

e. I think I lose to Floyd a lot.

f. I think Megas don’t forget an alt strat for their warriors. I think that, among many other reasons, is why I am not a Mega.

g. I think Riff Raff’s strikers and slashers be all Inigo Montoya fencers and it’s annoying.

h. Coffeenerdness: For years, BoV has labored over the steaming wand churning out, on average, three café lattes per day, each with a bespoke rendition of latte art. I may have to make some of the better ones available via NFT. But anyway, she has upgraded both her game and our coffee machine to something that will, effectively, make any damn thing you want. On the plus side, it is automatic. On the downside, there is no latte art. Cheap philosophy there.

i. I think I wish I could remove the Taunt capability of my warriors because it always seems like my warrior, who has someone on the ropes, makes some infuriating smart-ass remark, just to have that warrior righteously smack the living crap out of mine for the win. I think it is especially aggravating when tDO. Because, well, tDO.

j. Winenerdness: Steak 44 in Scottsdale, or “Snottsdale” to the locals, has Symmetry. Life will be good in January.

k. I think it’s fun to be in an alliance like TEABAG where, when you flip a page and see a fight against an ally, your stomach immediately clenches. I think it was fitting to be put out of both Inits and Rooks by one’s allies.

l. OCR of the Week: “deflects mellow with his LONGSWORD”, followed closely by “It was a mighty Mow”

m. I think that – in contrast to the rest of the known universe – the chance of strikers dying goes up as their will increases.

n. I think a rooks TC Aimed Blow is not necessarily a fit for Inits.

o. I think I would pay to attend a DMobster Total Parry Master Class.

p. I think I absolutely hate seeing the “has been eliminated” language in reverse on the back of the page you are reading.

q. I think there is not much you can do in a mailer when your dodge LU runs headfirst into a slash tactic striker.

r. Obit of the Week: When you distil a tourney crew down to a point, virtually anyone you lose hits pretty hard. This tourney’s most promising dirt nap was a 8-13-4-11-21-6-21 AB who was 3-0 in rooks when he went "ack!"

Who I like in January

Being a basic tourney manager, in every sense of the word, I have hopefuls throughout basic and generally not in the non-basic arenas. If I had to pick classes, I would say Inits, Rooks, and Apps in that order.

Adieu Haiku

Haikus are passé
Limericks are where it’s at
Edward Lear this year!

Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2022 2:29 am

Vladimer wrote:

Welcome to the John Madden Memorial version of the Monday Morning Tourney Quarterback (JMMMMTQB)! Let’s roll the tape!

Quotes of the week

"The only yardstick for success our society has is being a champion. No one remembers anything else." – John Madden

My, my, my…. This was something of an “also ran” tourney with two runners up and two 3rd place finishers. On the dexter side of the equation, it was fantastic to go so deep on multiple occasions. On the sinister, well, what John said.

Let's look at the live side first:

My New Suit, a ST who had failed to TV in rooks through inits, was sitting pretty at 11-1 in Adepts only to be put out, and rightly so I might add, by the ultimate TC, TMM’s Shout and runner up, DMob’s Zekken, from whom he also took his first loss.

Bianca On The Boom was absolutely one of my tourney favorites going in to the Apps tournament. A SL with a damage bonus, decise learns, and rugged good looks, he had it all. Where he struggled was Wastes. He ripped off 9 initial wins, including 3 over ST’s, then took a loss from the Waste Sky Comma. A win against an OAB warrior and then he was stopped in his tracks by another Waste in Wile E. Coyote. He had secured a TV by this point, but he certainly looked to be on his way out. But then he went on a tear (pronounced “tair” not “teer”), putting out a TEABAG ally ST, a DMob TP in Coraku and a LU in Wickersham. Round 16 brought a Convicted Thief standby and I thought, “Holy crap, I might make the finals!”. Sure enough, Round 17 brought around Wickersham again and I suspected this was it. Having beaten him previously, I had high hopes going in. But this time, Angus’ LU dodged the first critical swing and things went downhill from there. Grats to Angus on his TC!

My dead tourney was arguably an unmitigated disaster. From Challengers to Champs to Adepts to Inits, not a single warrior made it back. That left Dead Apps:

My Striker, You Bot 8000 Puts made it to round 11 and a resurrection with just one loss to a ChiefI LU, who cheats by using the Response tactic with his LU’s. You heard it here first. He, meaning Bot not ChiefI, won five more fights just to get owned by a JE lunger. Wasn't that guy quitting? During that run of five wins, the round 13 fight brought a tDO striker in Dirty Water. A three line clash for Decise and Dirty Water came out swinging but a critical dodge from You Bot and an apropos rippo, if you will, ended that fight, putting the second loss on Dirty Water. I flipped over that fight to find Bot facing Dirty Water again. Was this the finals?! Awesome, cause I just beat this chump! Sadly, Bot did not dodge the first Dirty swing this time and went out at 11-3.

In parallel, My Best Laid Plans, an Aimed Blow, had also seen some success after losing his first fight, getting to round ten only to lose his second to Lou’s Bodyguard while achieving resurrection nonetheless. Round eleven saw a win against Dirty Water, giving tDO’s warrior his first loss. A few more wins and Round 14 saw a matchup against Mordant Deserter. Oh snap. I think he just made the finals! Sure enough, Round 15 saw Dirty Water standing nervously across the sands again. Having beaten him pretty soundly earlier and also having put both Dirty’s losses on him overall, this seemed a pretty good shot at a Dead TC and immortality. Once again, Best Laid Plans dodged and took control of the fight, sending Dirty desperate. But this time, Dirty’s desperation strategy managed a crit swing and hit which in turn sent BLP desperate. A quick dodge from BLP and suddenly Dirty was wheezing (after 6 attacks, no less!). While DW was resting at the end of Minute 1, BLP took another swing but it was dodged. Feeling pretty good about the fight thus far, Minute 2 began like an Eminem song with “but hold your nose cause here goes the cold water” when Dirty Water led with a crit and put BLP out in the Runner Up spot. This ultimately left You Bot tied for 3rd place.

““Boom! He’s on his back!” – John Madden

My favorite to TC for the entire tourney was My Sealed Lips, a 9-7-9-21-17-14-7 SL who was blessed in INI, RIP, ATT, damage and manhood. He came into the Champions contest having gone 7-3 in Apps, 10-3 in Inits, and 11-3-1 in Adepts. Sure enough, after a single round 3 loss to a JE Striker – those decise battles with Strikers are always tricky – MSL rolled into a Riff Raff Striker to secure his 3rd Tourney Victor status at 9-1. Round 11, enter One Man Fury, a Doc Steele size 3 AB with large hands. No problem, I thought. With AMAS ATT, MSL should be able to make short work of this guy. And while my slasher was able to send the Good Doctor’s warrior desperate multiple times, that was about all she wrote on that sheet of music. Except for the coda where One Man Fury sent My Sealed Lips to his grave.

“I respect coaches. I respect what good coaches do. I know that you don’t learn to be a coach in an hour and a half.” -- John Madden

Seven years back into this game and every day is still a learning experience, particularly from talking to and being beaten by the consistently great managers. I’ve come along as a manager but there’s always another challenge to be better.

Awards of the week

In all, Team Vlad managed 12 awards for an award percentage of a little over 8%. As Runner Up, Bianca On The Boom won a set of Wiggler Bass Lures™ but fell just short of the highly coveted Wiggler Personal Massager™.

The TV’s crossed a plethora of styles, including Aimed Blow, Bashing, Lunging, Slashing, Wall of Steel and, under Floyd’s Theory of Tourney Optimization™, three Strikers.

Stats of the week

I have adopted the view that the All Saints Eve tourney is really two tourneys. One live, one dead. Accordingly, I entered a goodly number of warriors on both sides of the grave as if each were its own tourney. I use the fact that I am not paying for a flight or hotel to justify this. Overall, the team managed a 501-425-10-9 record or just over 54%. Dead and Live sides were both pretty representative of the final win percentage. I also picked up 7 Stylemasters, though a few of those were in the Tourney of the Dead which I presume means nothing.

Best style: Slashers at 61%. This is gratifying, given how poorly I have historically managed slashers!

Worst Style: Every year or two I dust off a PL. And every year or two it makes my Worst Style list. In this instance, in partnership with the Parry Strike style because Parry Strikes. Both landed at 25%.

Best Class: Challengers, a class where I am something of a novice, landed at 61%.

Worst Class: ADM at 40%, followed closely by Inits at 43%.

Factoids that may only interest me

I. Out of 12 awards, only 2 had a WL lower than 15. Two of them had at least one kill which perhaps contradicts my assertion that kill desire loses fights. I still stand by that assertion, by the by.

II. After filtering out the Tourney of the Dead deaths, all of my fatalities were in Rooks except My Sealed Lips mentioned above. This is probably for the best.

III. I am finding myself running more and more untimed warriors in tourneys. This batch went a collective 52% with only a single 0-3 so I guess that’s decent.

Mr. United Global Services Member Travel Note

This upcoming trip to Tempe for the Face to Face – if Omnicron doesn’t derail it – will mark the first time I have flown since Covid hit in March of 2020. Almost two years later, it will be surreal to board a flight again after two years having, effectively, commuted to work by airplane for a number of years prior to that. The flight callous has worn off and I’m frankly dreading it. I am bringing BoV as an emotional support companion because she plays a mean game of golf. At least one of us does!

Brief truths

A. Losing to Angus for the Apps championship was the best part of the tourney for me. Watching Gentle Ben call his shot and nail the ADM tournament was a close second.

B. Winning your first tourney fight is auspicious, regardless of class.

C. Sadness is seeing your first TMM opponent when your warrior is already on the bubble. Happiness is putting the first loss on Bob in Challengers.

D. Having your 14FE basher stomp through the Adepts class for a 9-3 Tourney Victor and Stylemaster, to land perfectly on 20FE, feels like nailing the Triple Lundy.

Ten things I think I think

1. I think I didn’t know what to think when my tourney box was adorned with a “HAL” sticker.

2. I think breaking even in Eligibles in my first effort for the class felt pretty sweet. I think the higher the class, the better it feels to take a win off a manager you respect, even if it was prolly one of their scrubs. I think my Grandmaster ATT warrior couldn’t hit the Aimed Blows and I had better get used to that frustration.

3. I think I loved that Superior Snotling’s race is…. Snotling.

4. I think Watson still doesn’t like a loss. I think losing to Watson in ADM was ironic.

5. I think I will really miss reporting whether The Otto giveth or taketh away for any given tourney. RIP.

6. I think I will need to pay more attention to warriors who can’t seem to draw a backup to save their fight, tourney or even life.

7. I think, whether I like it or not, I am slowly building an army of dead Challengers which will eventually be live Challengers. I think I better figure out how one goes about that smartly.

8. I think I gleefully Orange Sheet Slid™ a freshman fight which was a rematch between tDO’s basher Armageddon and my Miguel where the latter had won a previous Champs matchup for the basher stylemaster pot. I think I cackled evilly when I saw his basher had landed that sweet war flail as his fave. I think I wept bitter tears when his basher whupped my basher’s butt with the whiffle. Typical tDO.

9. I think I was scratching my head when coming across a Weirdo warrior in round three who was 0-2. I think I was not confused that he was 0-2 – this being a Weirdo warrior after all – but rather how he was still in the tourney when you were supposed to have to win one of your first two fights to proceed to round 3. I think the announcement lied.

10. I think these are the other things I think this week:

a. I think I love the “Get a life!” jeer in the Tourney of the Dead.

b. I think two fights into rooks with matches against two OAB warriors meant rooks was going to be a long haul.

c. I think it is pretty dang hard to scum a Doc Steele striker.

d. I think when your fine Frosh FI AB gets hit in the first fight by the first lame regular swing from a lame parry-strike of all things, it is disheartening. I think it is embarrassing when you discover he wasn’t even using his fave strat as intended.

e. I think I lose to Floyd a lot.

f. I think Megas don’t forget an alt strat for their warriors. I think that, among many other reasons, is why I am not a Mega.

g. I think Riff Raff’s strikers and slashers be all Inigo Montoya fencers and it’s annoying.

h. Coffeenerdness: For years, BoV has labored over the steaming wand churning out, on average, three café lattes per day, each with a bespoke rendition of latte art. I may have to make some of the better ones available via NFT. But anyway, she has upgraded both her game and our coffee machine to something that will, effectively, make any damn thing you want. On the plus side, it is automatic. On the downside, there is no latte art. Cheap philosophy there.

i. I think I wish I could remove the Taunt capability of my warriors because it always seems like my warrior, who has someone on the ropes, makes some infuriating smart-ass remark, just to have that warrior righteously smack the living crap out of mine for the win. I think it is especially aggravating when tDO. Because, well, tDO.

j. Winenerdness: Steak 44 in Scottsdale, or “Snottsdale” to the locals, has Symmetry. Life will be good in January.

k. I think it’s fun to be in an alliance like TEABAG where, when you flip a page and see a fight against an ally, your stomach immediately clenches. I think it was fitting to be put out of both Inits and Rooks by one’s allies.

l. OCR of the Week: “deflects mellow with his LONGSWORD”, followed closely by “It was a mighty Mow”

m. I think that – in contrast to the rest of the known universe – the chance of strikers dying goes up as their will increases.

n. I think a rooks TC Aimed Blow is not necessarily a fit for Inits.

o. I think I would pay to attend a DMobster Total Parry Master Class.

p. I think I absolutely hate seeing the “has been eliminated” language in reverse on the back of the page you are reading.

q. I think there is not much you can do in a mailer when your dodge LU runs headfirst into a slash tactic striker.

r. Obit of the Week: When you distil a tourney crew down to a point, virtually anyone you lose hits pretty hard. This tourney’s most promising dirt nap was a 8-13-4-11-21-6-21 AB who was 3-0 in rooks when he went "ack!"

Who I like in January

Being a basic tourney manager, in every sense of the word, I have hopefuls throughout basic and generally not in the non-basic arenas. If I had to pick classes, I would say Inits, Rooks, and Apps in that order.

Adieu Haiku

Haikus are passé
Limericks are where it’s at
Edward Lear this year!

There once was a manager named Vlad.
Who such a fine tournament he had.
He's taking time off.
For some Phoenix golf.
Manne and Consortium are glad.