DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 04/19/2018    Duedate: 05/16/2018

ARKERS ARENA

DM-8    TURN-424

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

HUMBLE LEE
SERIOUS LEE (486)
(8-4061) [19-21-0,112]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

HUMBLE LEE                     POSITION IS EMPTY
SERIOUS LEE (486)              
(8-4061) [19-21-0,112]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

JHERI BLOOMERS                 JHERI BLOOMERS
HOYT FOUNDATION (636)          HOYT FOUNDATION (636)
(8-5643) [17-20-3,95]          (8-5643) [17-20-3,95]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

HOYT FOUNDATION (636)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. FOREST GARDEN (642)         34
2. THE CHOSEN (613)            30      Z GLADIATORZ (519)
3. Z GLADIATORZ (519)          30      Unchartered Team
4. THE TRAVELERS (639)         21
5. HOYT FOUNDATION (636)       13      SPEKTRALSTEINENE (222)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 Z GLADIATORZ (519)       355 189 10 65.3   1/ 4 HOYT FOUNDATION (636)     9  6 1
 2/ 2 SMITHSONIAN (245)        832 500 18 62.5   2/ 3 SMITHSONIAN (245)         7  3 0
 3/ 3 BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)   135 100  6 57.4   3/ 6 Z GLADIATORZ (519)        7  4 1
 4/ 4 THE CHOSEN (613)         311 296 22 51.2   4/ 2 BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)    7  5 0
 5/ 5 HOYT FOUNDATION (636)    129 124 11 51.0   5/ 5 THE CHOSEN (613)          7  6 2
 6/ 6 SERIOUS LEE (486)         76  78  2 49.4   6/ 1 BOOK OF THOMAS (411)      6  5 2
 7/ 7 BOOK OF THOMAS (411)     113 144  9 44.0   7/ 7 FOREST GARDEN (642)       6  5 0
 8/ 8 FOREST GARDEN (642)       27  38  2 41.5   8/ 9 THE TRAVELERS (639)       3  9 0
 9/ 9 THE TRAVELERS (639)       20  61  0 24.7   9/ 8 SERIOUS LEE (486)         2  2 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                      SPY REPORT

     Much has changed in ARKERS since last I was here.  Never fear, Olaf Modeen 
adapts to many situations, as do all successful fighters.  Woof!  BOOK OF THOMAS were 
a bunch of dogs after HOYT FOUNDATION got through with 'em!  6th ain't so sweet as 
1st!  Phhbltt!  Too much drinking and too little dodging gave BOOK OF THOMAS a 0-3-0! 
I got a good laugh out of it!  Ya gotta be quick on yer feet!  Keep your elbow off 
the table!  Thrust!  Block out the pain!  HOYT FOUNDATION is now ranked 1st with a 
3-2-0 turn.  Some people say I ramble too much, I don't say anything relevant.  I 
repeat myself.  I ramble.  Well THE CHOSEN moved up 0, to 5th.  What's with GOLD 
RUSH?  It actually beat SERIOUS LEE's CRUEL LEE, and walked away with 28 more points 
from the fight.  Major screwup at SERIOUS LEE.  CRUEL LEE lost 24 points to GOLD 
RUSH.  Some new strategies, perhaps?  Maybe CRUEL LEE will provide more easy wins...  
See how the Duelmaster challenged Z GLADIATORZ's ZIRCONIUM?  That sort of initiative 
is how he got where he is now.  Try as it might, ZIRCONIUM wasn't good enough at 
persuading THE DEALER to step down from the Duelmaster's throne...  Wouldn't it be 
nice to have live subjects to practice on?  I hear some team is looking into the uses 
of convicted prisoners.   
     If at first you don't succeed, avoid.  That'll get you in the Spyreports.  The 
most avoided team was BLOODY HAND CLAN.  The bums at SMITHSONIAN couldn't face the 
challenges from BLOODY HAND CLAN!  No excuse for that!  How well I know the feeling 
of being the most challenged warrior, HODGE PODGE!  Don't make idle boasts, they may 
come back to haunt you.  Keep challenging up 38 points, UGARG SNOTSNIK, and I won't 
have to write about you much longer.  JHERI BLOOMERS always accepts those kind of 
challenges...  Sometimes what you expect to do (like in the fights) doesn't expect to 
turn out like you thought.  UGARG SNOTSNIK beat JHERI BLOOMERS.  It don't make sense. 
Maybe FOREST GARDEN's BASKETEER is one of those guys who likes pain, or something.  
That's what he'll get next week, after challenging up 30 to PILGRIM.  PILGRIM must 
not been fighting well, cause he lost to BASKETEER of FOREST GARDEN.  Sometimes you 
just have a bad day where things get, um, mixed up.   
     Warriors of ARKERS unite.  You have only your games to lose!  Here's some 
advice:  study your opponent, master many skills, fight dirty.   
     Many other cities have retirement homes for aged warriors.  Any plans here?  All 
work and no play makes Olaf a dull fighter.  Work and play no fighter dull Olaf.  
Olaffighterwork and no play.  Time for my medication, so I'll leave now.  Practice, 
practice, practice!-- Olaf Modeen  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HUMBLE LEE 4061              19  21  0   112       SERIOUS LEE (486)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-GROUND SHEET 3725            16  11  2   105       BOOK OF THOMAS (411)
 UGARG SNOTSNIK 5815          15   2  0   100       BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)
-'ACKY GIT 5814               11   3  1    99       BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)
 GUTSAG BAKWORT 5500          26  19  0    97       BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)
 JHERI BLOOMERS 5643          17  20  3    95       HOYT FOUNDATION (636)
 EIGER THE HARDY 5811         15   3  0    95       THE CHOSEN (613)
 ZIRCONIUM 5493               26  11  0    92       Z GLADIATORZ (519)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GOLD RUSH 5851                5   2  1    85       SMITHSONIAN (245)
 MAUD STONEGUT 5721           14  12  2    73       BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)
-ZULU 5817                     5   5  0    71       Z GLADIATORZ (519)
 THE BEGGAR 5848               8   3  0    69       HOYT FOUNDATION (636)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CRUEL LEE 5676               10   8  2    62       SERIOUS LEE (486)
 ZOMBIE 5823                   6   4  1    62       Z GLADIATORZ (519)
 BASKETEER 5749                7   4  1    60       FOREST GARDEN (642)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 RAL STORMBREAKER 5786        11  10  0    54       THE CHOSEN (613)
 PILGRIM 5842                  8   4  0    50       SMITHSONIAN (245)
 ZEPHYR 5824                   8   6  0    46       Z GLADIATORZ (519)
 WILY GIT 5844                 8   2  0    38       BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GETTYSBURG 5854               4   1  0    38       SMITHSONIAN (245)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LORD SHADOW 5627              7  11  0    33       THE TRAVELERS (639)
 TOOTHLESS LOVE 5847           5   6  0    33       HOYT FOUNDATION (636)
-MYSTERIOUS LEE 5729           5   2  0    33       SERIOUS LEE (486)
-HAL THE CRAZED 5858           2   1  1    33       THE CHOSEN (613)
 HODGE PODGE 5790              3   2  0    31       BOOK OF THOMAS (411)
-PIP SQUEAK 5789               3   0  1    27       BOOK OF THOMAS (411)
 ZUCCHINI 5859                 3   0  1    27       Z GLADIATORZ (519)
-BUFFALO ROAMS 5855            2   2  0    25       SMITHSONIAN (245)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TREE ANEMONE 5863             2   0  0    20       FOREST GARDEN (642)
 LADY SMOKE 5665               2  10  0    20       THE TRAVELERS (639)
 WILLA THE MIST 5861           2   0  0    20       FOREST GARDEN (642)
 SHAWNDO 5853                  5   3  0    18       HOYT FOUNDATION (636)
 ALAMARAYANE 5652              2  12  0    18       THE TRAVELERS (639)
 SCRAP METAL 5758              4   3  1    16       BOOK OF THOMAS (411)
 VAMPYRILLA 5865               1   0  0    14       THE TRAVELERS (639)
 ALBUS BONERATTLER 5874        1   1  1    12       THE CHOSEN (613)
-SARATOGA 5860                 1   0  0    10       SMITHSONIAN (245)
-GENERAL LEE 5796              0   2  0    10       SERIOUS LEE (486)
 THISTLE MAN 5862              1   1  0     4       FOREST GARDEN (642)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
HEDIES 5878             0  1 0 BOOK OF THOMAS 411   HIGH ELF              424  NONE
TROUBADOUR 5840         1  1 0 BOOK OF THOMAS 411   HAL THE CRAZED 5858   422  REVENGED
HERMIT CRONE 5864       0  2 0 FOREST GARDEN 642    ALBUS BONERATTLE 5874 424   
ONL CERL 5856           2  2 0 THE CHOSEN 613       PIP SQUEAK 5789       422   
AMAZON QUEEN 5629       4 12 0 THE TRAVELERS 639    SCRAP METAL 5758      422   
WAR PIG 5871            0  1 0 THE TRAVELERS 639    ZUCCHINI 5859         424   

                                     PERSONAL ADS

The Dealer, congrats! You make a fine Duelmaster. -- Curator

Sorry, we didn't graze last round. -- Buffalo Roams

Ral Stormbreaker, I think I was the chosen. (wink) -- Gold Rush

Ugarg Snotsnik, I thought we got rid of all the locals and redskins? Where were you 
hiding, cretin?! -- Pilgrim

Hermit Crone, I am sorry for the hurt. How does your garden grow? -- Saratoga

Good luck to all in The Mailer. I don't think any of mine participated. -- Curator

Health. Humility. Honor. -- Curator

Ve Z's ve 3-0. Yu zuck! -- The Zee Man (Mr. Z to you.)

Gold Rush -- I hear you are a tourney victor. Thank you.  I learned a lot. Like not to 
fight you again. -- Ral Stormbreaker

Book of Thomas -- Wow. Ground Sheet huh? Whatever. You avenged your fallen. It was not 
a great show of arms considering your veteran status and my lack of experience. I 
should have never hit you one time much less two. The great part about this situation 
is that I attempted to blood feud Pip Squeak. I thought it would be a good match if 
the two killers fought each other. Unfortunately, Pippy Running Stockings did not 
show. What a coward! -- Hal the Crazed

Zirconium -- Despite me working my powers of persuasion on the commission and getting 
Defensive Lee out of here, you are beyond my special gift. Might I suggest that you 
stick with Z Man. He is the best thing to happen to you. -- Eiger the Hardy

Humble Lee -- Way to go! You essentially gave up being Duel Master.  Better luck next 
time. -- Halin Stormbreaker, Lord Protector

0-5-0! Ugh. That is what I get for sending everyone in at the last minute. My 
personals and stuff were finished and as I about to send it all in, I got the urge to 
play. That'll teach me. Now, let's try to fix this mess. -- Longshot

Good ting I missed last turn. Dat wuz a mad house in da top tier. Da dwarf got beat on 
his way out. Brilliant! Hehehehehe... Blue Whack-a-Do! -- Acky Git

Humble Lee -- If yoo knew wat I wuz gonna say, why did yoos git it wrong? Ya call yer 
self 'umble Lee. But yoos said da wrong ting tryin' ta make funz of me. Ya den missed 
last turn. Yoos missed an eazy win and da chance ta be da duelingmastah. Anyone could 
'ave beaten da dwarf. Yoos not 'umble.  Yoos stoopid! Stoopid Lee. Hur hur hur! -- 
Ugarg Snotsnik

Kung Fu Master - Yoos still 'Kung Poo Mastah' ta me. Hur hur hur. -- Gutsag

Ambitious Guard -- Hehhehhehehehehe... Yoo folded faster than a dwarf facing a hoarde 
of goblinz.  Hehehehehehehe... Zim zim zala bim! -- Wily Git

Pilgrim -- ***Dats sum tough luck der, Pilgrim. *** Dat wuz my Orc Wayne 
impersonation. He wuz da 'ardest orc dat ever lived.  Hur hur hur! -- Ugarg Snotsnik

I know wat boys like. I got wat guys want. I know what boyz like. Boyz like. Boyz like 
me.  ***Braaaaap*** ***Rubs belly*** -- Maud "Too Sexy" Stonegut

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

HEDIES was butchered by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
THE DEALER devastated ZIRCONIUM in a 2 minute gruesome one-sided Challenge duel.
UGARG SNOTSNIK subdued JHERI BLOOMERS in a action packed 4 minute Challenge fight.
RAL STORMBREAKER devastated HODGE PODGE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest.
BASKETEER defeated PILGRIM in a crowd pleasing 2 minute Challenge match.
SHAWNDO slimly lost to LORD SHADOW in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
WILLA THE MIST defeated ALAMARAYANE in a 4 minute Challenge struggle.
TREE ANEMONE narrowly defeated LADY SMOKE in a 6 minute Challenge melee.
HERMIT CRONE was assassinated by ALBUS BONERATTLER in a 1 minute Challenge duel.
GUTSAG BAKWORT defeated KHALHUMS DWARF in a dull 4 minute veteran's fight.
HUMBLE LEE overpowered MAUD STONEGUT in a exciting 1 minute one-sided Title fight.
EIGER THE HARDY devastated KUNG-FU MASTER in a 2 minute brutal mismatched conflict.
CRUEL LEE was demolished by GOLD RUSH in a 1 minute one-sided brawl.
THE BEGGAR handily defeated GETTYSBURG in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
WILY GIT was vanquished by ZOMBIE in a action packed 1 minute mismatched bout.
ZEPHYR handily defeated FRATSFA MERCENARY in a 1 minute bloody mismatched bout.
SCRAP METAL was devastated by TOOTHLESS LOVE in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.
THISTLE MAN was beaten by VAMPYRILLA in a 1 minute novice's bout.
ZUCCHINI assassinated WAR PIG in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  8         SLASHING ATTACK   23 -   9 -  2      72  |
|AIMED BLOW                       5         WALL OF STEEL     16 -   8 -  1      67  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         TOTAL PARRY       34 -  21 -  0      62  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   4         PARRY-RIPOSTE      3 -   2 -  0      60  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         AIMED BLOW        20 -  14 -  1      59  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         PARRY-LUNGE        8 -   7 -  0      53  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         STRIKING ATTACK   35 -  31 -  3      53  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         LUNGING ATTACK    13 -  14 -  2      48  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         BASHING ATTACK    22 -  33 -  1      40  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         PARRY-STRIKE       1 -   7 -  0      13  |

Turn 424 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        3 -  0     AIMED BLOW         2 -  3         4  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  3         2  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         2  BASHING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  1         1  PARRY-LUNGE    
STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  4                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  2                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      UGARG SNOTSNIK 5815        15   2  0  100 BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)
SLASHING ATTACK  GOLD RUSH 5851              5   2  1   85 SMITHSONIAN (245)
BASHING ATTACK   MAUD STONEGUT 5721         14  12  2   73 BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)
STRIKING ATTACK  THE BEGGAR 5848             8   3  0   69 HOYT FOUNDATION (636)
PARRY-LUNGE      BASKETEER 5749              7   4  1   60 FOREST GARDEN (642)
AIMED BLOW       WILY GIT 5844               8   2  0   38 BLOODY HAND CLAN (626)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is JHERI BLOOMERS 5643.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was JHERI BLOOMERS 5643.  The ten other most popular fighters were PILGRIM 5842, 
LADY SMOKE 5665, TREE ANEMONE 5863, UGARG SNOTSNIK 5815, ALAMARAYANE 5652, HUMBLE LEE 
4061, ZOMBIE 5823, RAL STORMBREAKER 5786, BASKETEER 5749, and SHAWNDO 5853.

The least popular fighter this week was GUTSAG BAKWORT 5500.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were WAR PIG 5871, THISTLE MAN 5862, GETTYSBURG 5854, CRUEL LEE 
5676, MAUD STONEGUT 5721, HERMIT CRONE 5864, WILLA THE MIST 5861, HODGE PODGE 5790, 
HEDIES 5878, and SCRAP METAL 5758.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

FIELDER (8-5276) YOU PAY I SLAY (373)

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

THE DEALER (8-5685) HOYT FOUNDATION (636)

                      SUMMER FACE-TO-FACE IN ARLINGTON, VIRGINIA

We have planned our summer FTF for July 13-15, 2018, in Arlington, Virginia, only 7 
miles on a quick Metro ride from Washington, D.C.!.  It will be held at the Holiday 
Inn Arlington at Ballston.  Room rates are $120 per night on 7/12 and 7/15 and $79 on 
7/13 and 7/14, 1-2 occupancy.  There's free wireless throughout the property as well 
as a fitness center, outdoor pool, and business center, as well as a resturant and bar 
inside the hotel.  There is no airport shuttle and parking is $7/day.  The rooms are 
blocked -- ask for the Reality Simulations block.  Reservations must be made by 6/12.  
(As always if you have issues making reservations, please let us know!)  

                   Hotel site:  https://aws.passkey.com/e/49602680

Look for the tournament info sheet and minioverviews some time in June.  We hope 
you're all looking forward to it and that we will see you there!

                                          -- RSI

                                NAME CHANGE-O-RAMA

     Algernon, who had NOT gotten the name change he'd asked for, looked at the latest 
petitioner.  This was a typical gladiator, big, muscular, and scarred, with a frown.  
"Ah, what can I do for you?"
     "Name change.  I heard we can do that.  I'm tired of being Jane Doe."
     "I'd think you would be," Algernon said faintly.  "The Commission has actually 
been thinking about this.  It isn't FREE, mind you!  It takes money to run our office, 
you know, and we want to buy some goats--"
     "I don't care about goats!"  He made a crude suggestion about goats.
     "Gladiators, teams, it will cost you two dollars to make a change--"
     "I had a talk with my manager.  He'll find the money.  I want to change my name 
to Jane Ralph.  I'm no doe!"  He thumped a fist on the counter.
     "Er, yes.  Jane Ralph.  Fill out this form, please."  He pushed the paper across 
the counter.  "The changes start on the 15th of April--that's the Ides, you know, and 
can be submitted through the end of May.  With the payment.  No change without the 
goat, ah, the gold."

                                  *   *   *   *   *  

     Warrior and team name changes will be accepted beginning April 15 and continuing 
throughout the month of May.  The cost will be $2 per name change.  All proceeds will 
be used to buy goats via Heifer International and will be matched up to $500.  
If you have names you want to change, please contact Customer Service. -- RSI