DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 02/24/2017    Duedate: 03/23/2017

XOCHITHLAN ARENA

DM-39    TURN-360

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

POOPS THROUGH DIAPER
BASH BROS BABY (461)
(39-3891) [11-3-0,93]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

SUPERSLICE                     BRAYD HULT
ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)           BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)
(39-4074) [15-7-1,102]         (39-4154) [3-0-0,41]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

PARRY-SLICE                    BOTTLE ROCKET
ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)           BOOK OF THOMAS (479)
(39-4078) [19-13-1,80]         (39-4157) [10-2-1,95]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

BOOK OF THOMAS (479)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. BASH BROS BABY (461)        67
2. BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)       49      DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
3. PARKLAND (473)              36      Unchartered Team
4. DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)        7
5. BOOK OF THOMAS (479)         4      BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)      9   5  0 64.3   1/ 1 BOOK OF THOMAS (479)     11  3 2
 2/ 1 DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)    253 167 15 60.2   2/ 2 BASH BROS BABY (461)      9  5 0
 3/ 2 BOOK OF THOMAS (479)      40  34  3 54.1   3/ 3 ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)      7  8 0
 4/ 3 BASH BROS BABY (461)      67  57  5 54.0   4/ 4 PARKLAND (473)            6  8 0
 5/ 4 ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)     114 110  7 50.9   5/ 0*BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)     4  1 0
 6/ 5 PARKLAND (473)            58  67  2 46.4   6/ 5 DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)     2  1 1
 7/ 6 WORLD BLADES 8 (466)      10  17  0 37.0   7/ 6 WORLD BLADES 8 (466)      2  4 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Yo ho, yo ho, a PIKER's life for me!

     Greetings!  It's a rare treat to address the river port city of Xochithlan as 
your Duelmaster.  We're an odd city, being the southernmost township in Alastari, and 
last stop for anyone on their way to the Twisted Lands.  I suppose it's only fitting 
that the oddest of styles rule the day.

          "The problem is not the problem.  The problem is your attitude 
          about the problem.  Do you understand?" -- Jack Sparrow

     Truth be told, I've never really understood why my style has become anathema to 
so many managers.  Sure, my style may be difficult to win with if you're Joe Average, 
but how many Mr. Right Handeds have long and successful gladiatorial careers, anyway?  
For those with the courage to write "PS" on their gladiator application, you find ...

     *  The top ranked PS in Primus is #47 Axe Murderer at 108-67-3.  And no, 
        he's NOT a BG DIY.  
     *  The top PS is ranked ahead of the top PL, TP and BA in the game!
     *  Over the last 10 turns, Pikers have amassed a 43-45-4 record, ahead of 
        PL, ST and BA.  

     So, we AREN'T the worst!  IF I return for another turn, I'll reveal my somewhat 
unique design and the method of my madness.  As a tease, let me just say that if you 
consider the more highly regarded Wall of Steel style to be truly Parry-Slash, then 
running a Parry-Strike loses some of its mystery.

                                          Toodles, 

                                          Parry-Slice.
                                          DUELMASTER!!!

                                      SPY REPORT

     Good day, friends and fiends, welcome to your friendly neighborhood spyreport.  
I doubt XOCHITHLAN will ever be the same.  The BASH BROS BABY guild has had a 4-1-0 
turn and deserves to be watched in the future.  You never know where this kind of 
thing can lead.  And let's see, DOESN'T SLEEP fought BRUNEI and gained 21 points and 
contributed to BASH BROS BABY's 4-1-0.  STRATOSPHERE has lost to BRAIN STOEN, falling 
9 points, while helping make BOOK OF THOMAS a 3-2-0 turn.  We should ask POOPS 
THROUGH DIAPER about the thrill of victory, and what being the new Duelmaster does 
for a warrior, he's now the one to ask.  Can someone confirm a rumor for me?  I hear 
the top team makes their losing fighters do dishes at The Warty Toad until they win.  
Maybe?   
     He who challenges well, fights well.  He who avoids without cause, shall lose 
for good reasons.  My mama told me that one.  I also notice that the WORLD BLADES 8 
stable was the most avoided team this turn.  Come on XOCHITHLAN, what are you afraid 
of?  And avoiding WORLD BLADES 8 more than any other team we find BASH BROS BABY.  
XOCHITHLAN, are we going to accept, or respect this sort of thing?  Well, sports 
fans, take notice that SWAN from PARKLAND was XOCHITHLAN's most challenged warrior 
this turn.  In a fit of brilliance or of stupidity (hard to say sometimes), 
PROPHESLICE challenged MANILA today, facing a 26 difference in recognition.  Even 
though PROPHESLICE lost the fight, he at least came away with a gain of 9 points for 
challenging on of WORLD BLADES 8.   
     The Dark Arena is for those who cannot win, not who cannot lose with grace.  
Dignity in life or death is the warrior's creed.  The manager of BIG LAKE LUMBER will 
not be pleased to learn that JEHTRO DAVICK, a 2-0-0 fighter, has been killed at the 
hands of DUCKS UNLIMITED's DAISY DUCK.  Is it really true that XOCHITHLAN has more 
dishwashers per capita that fighters?  Just thought I'd ask...   
     Remember, blood on the purple robe does not change it from a purple robe.  Dare 
to fight bravely.  It's been nice chatting with you, until we meet again, keep your 
swords sharp and your hammers heavy.  Until you see my quill in XOCHITHLAN again, 
farewell-- Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 POOPS THROUGH DIAPER 3891    11   3  0    93       BASH BROS BABY (461)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-PEKING DUCK 3632             34  11  0   157       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
 SUPERSLICE 4074              15   7  1   102       ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)
 BOTTLE ROCKET 4157           10   2  1    95       BOOK OF THOMAS (479)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LOUD TOYS 4069               16  12  0    82       BASH BROS BABY (461)
 PARRY-SLICE 4078             19  13  1    80       ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)
 DAISY 4059                   14   9  0    78       PARKLAND (473)
 SWAN 4061                    12  11  0    71       PARKLAND (473)
 COLLYWOBBLES 4170            10   2  1    67       BOOK OF THOMAS (479)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DANGEROUS TOYS 4100          12   8  1    62       BASH BROS BABY (461)
 EUNUCH 4097                  10   6  0    58       ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 NOT THE MOM CRY 3888         11  19  1    53       BASH BROS BABY (461)
 DOESN'T SLEEP 4182            5   2  0    50       BASH BROS BABY (461)
 BRUNEI 3924                   6   4  0    42       WORLD BLADES 8 (466)
 DAISY DUCK 4150               8   7  1    41       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
 BRAYD HULT 4154               3   0  0    41       BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)
 MERE 4114                     5   5  0    39       PARKLAND (473)
 DIAMOND DUST 4198             4   0  0    37       BOOK OF THOMAS (479)
 MANILA 3923                   3   2  0    35       WORLD BLADES 8 (466)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DUCK DYNASTY 4168             4   1  0    33       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
 MAWRIE RAWSH 4153             1   1  0    24       BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CLIFF 4172                    1   4  0    22       PARKLAND (473)
 OLD GLORY 4199                3   1  1    17       BOOK OF THOMAS (479)
 KGNT CHAMBARD 4151            2   1  0    17       BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)
 BROOK 4202                    1   0  0    15       PARKLAND (473)
 BRAIN STOEN 4204              1   0  0    14       BIG LAKE LUMBER (483)
 FERNANDO 4050                 1   3  0    12       WORLD BLADES 8 (466)
 PROPHESLICE 4201              1   2  0     9       ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)
 STRATOSPHERE 4197             2   1  0     7       BOOK OF THOMAS (479)
-DUCK BOOTS 4187               0   1  0     1       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
AS SEEN ON TV! 4205     0  1 0 ANYWAYUSLICEIT 475   DARK ELF CLERIC       360  NONE
JEHTRO DAVICK 4155      2  1 0 BIG LAKE LUMBER 483  DAISY DUCK 4150       360   
LEA 4113                4  5 0 PARKLAND 473         COLLYWOBBLES 4170     358   

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Dangerous Toys -- Are we talking "bag o' broken glass" dangerous? -- Eunuch

     Wow.  I've gotta use that one. -- Ed.. 

Cliff -- I see blood in your future, blood like a river. -- Propheslice

Bottle Rocket -- If anyone asks me the secret to beating you, I'm going to tell them 
having triple the FE is key. -- Parry-Slice, commentator

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

AS SEEN ON TV! was butchered by DARK ELF CLERIC in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
MERE was vanquished by COLLYWOBBLES in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud battle.
EUNUCH was demolished by LOUD TOYS in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
NOT THE MOM CRY was devastated by SWAN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
PROPHESLICE was viciously subdued by MANILA in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
PARRY-SLICE was bested by POOPS THROUGH DIAPER in a 1 minute Title competition.
SUPERSLICE handily defeated RIRORNI OFFICER in a 1 minute uneven melee.
DAISY was viciously subdued by BOTTLE ROCKET in a popular 2 minute gruesome duel.
DANGEROUS TOYS vanquished RIRORNI JANISSARY in a exciting 1 minute one-sided fight.
BRUNEI was handily defeated by DOESN'T SLEEP in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
DAISY DUCK killed JEHTRO DAVICK in a crowd pleasing 1 minute match.
OLD GLORY was handily defeated by BRAYD HULT in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
DIAMOND DUST demolished FERNANDO in a 1 minute one-sided brawl.
MAWRIE RAWSH handily defeated RIRORNI WOMAN in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
KGNT CHAMBARD won victory over RIRORNI CHIEFTAIN in a 2 minute bout.
STRATOSPHERE was bested by BRAIN STOEN in a 2 minute beginner's duel.
CLIFF overpowered RIRORNI WOMAN in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
BROOK devastated LONG-RANGE ARCHERS in a 1 minute one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|BASHING ATTACK                   7         PARRY-STRIKE      14 -   6 -  0      70  |
|AIMED BLOW                       5         AIMED BLOW        19 -  11 -  2      63  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         TOTAL PARRY       12 -   8 -  0      60  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  4         BASHING ATTACK    30 -  23 -  2      57  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         LUNGING ATTACK    17 -  14 -  0      55  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      2         PARRY-LUNGE        3 -   4 -  0      43  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      7 -  10 -  1      41  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         STRIKING ATTACK   14 -  20 -  1      41  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         WALL OF STEEL      2 -   4 -  0      33  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  0         SLASHING ATTACK    1 -   7 -  0      13  |

Turn 360 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  3         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  2         2  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  0         2  BASHING ATTACK 
AIMED BLOW         4 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  1         2  AIMED BLOW     
BASHING ATTACK     4 -  3                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  2                                       1  PARRY-STRIKE   
                                                                1  WALL OF STEEL  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   POOPS THROUGH DIAPER 3891  11   3  0   93 BASH BROS BABY (461)
STRIKING ATTACK  SUPERSLICE 4074            15   7  1  102 ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)
BASHING ATTACK   BOTTLE ROCKET 4157         10   2  1   95 BOOK OF THOMAS (479)
PARRY-STRIKE     PARRY-SLICE 4078           19  13  1   80 ANYWAYUSLICEIT (475)
WALL OF STEEL    DAISY 4059                 14   9  0   78 PARKLAND (473)
TOTAL PARRY      SWAN 4061                  12  11  0   71 PARKLAND (473)
AIMED BLOW       COLLYWOBBLES 4170          10   2  1   67 BOOK OF THOMAS (479)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    DAISY DUCK 4150             8   7  1   41 DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is PARRY-SLICE 4078.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was BOTTLE ROCKET 4157.  The ten other most popular fighters were MANILA 3923, 
LOUD TOYS 4069, DANGEROUS TOYS 4100, SWAN 4061, SUPERSLICE 4074, JEHTRO DAVICK 4155, 
COLLYWOBBLES 4170, POOPS THROUGH DIAPER 3891, DAISY 4059, and DOESN'T SLEEP 4182.

The least popular fighter this week was BRUNEI 3924.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were PROPHESLICE 4201, EUNUCH 4097, MERE 4114, BROOK 4202, BRAIN STOEN 4204, 
FERNANDO 4050, OLD GLORY 4199, PARRY-SLICE 4078, NOT THE MOM CRY 3888, and AS SEEN ON 
TV! 4205.

                                CHALLENGES AND AVOIDS

To clarify:  You issue Challenges to warriors, but Avoid teams.  
To Challenge, write that warrior's name and ID# in the space provided. 
To Avoid, write the team's name and Team ID in that space. 
Make sure you include the ID!

                             * * * * *   MEMO  * * * * *

From:       The Office of Accurate Census Reporting, Gladiatorial Commission
To:         All Managers

In the interest of preserving our natural resources and preventing managerial writer's 
cramp, the census form has been eliminated, effective immediately.  Managers may 
register their warriors' races and/or favorite sayings by simply writing them on a 
separate piece of paper and submitting them to the Commission.  Each warrior may have 
up to 15 favorite sayings.  Each saying must be categorized Jeer, Gloat, Boredom, Ouch, 
Victory and may be up to 70 characters long.  For any questions, please contact the 
Gladiatorial Commission.