DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 02/26/2016    Duedate: 03/24/2016

ILLIS ARENA

DM-59    TURN-323

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

WILD BILL
YOUNG GUNS (316)
(59-2968) [11-4-1,80]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

WILD BILL                      SEA FOAM
YOUNG GUNS (316)               BOOK OF THOMAS (317)
(59-2968) [11-4-1,80]          (59-2987) [5-1-0,54]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

WILD BILL                      WILD BILL
YOUNG GUNS (316)               YOUNG GUNS (316)
(59-2968) [11-4-1,80]          (59-2968) [11-4-1,80]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

BOOK OF THOMAS (317)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)      37
2. BOOK OF THOMAS (317)        19      SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)
3. VICIOUS VAMPS (319)         15      Unchartered Team
4. YOUNG GUNS (316)            10
5. SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)      -3      VICIOUS VAMPS (319)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*VICIOUS VAMPS (319)        4   1  1 80.0   1/ 1*BOOK OF THOMAS (317)      9  4 0
 2/ 4*BOOK OF THOMAS (317)      16  11  1 59.3   2/ 3 YOUNG GUNS (316)          6  6 1
 3/ 5 SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)    28  29  6 49.1   3/ 6*VICIOUS VAMPS (319)       4  1 1
 4/ 6 BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)   115 126  3 47.7   4/ 2 BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)    3  8 1
 5/ 7 YOUNG GUNS (316)          27  31  2 46.6   5/ 7 SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)    1  2 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                      SPY REPORT

     If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of 
ILLIS brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too.  VICIOUS VAMPS turned their 2-1-1 turn 
into a 3rd place rank in the listings this turn.  Any better than this, and you get 
put on hit lists.  Of course, we're all terribly impressed to see ALWAYS AN ADDICT 
win a fight and gain 23 points, terribly.  Tsk, tsk, ALWAYS AN ADDICT beat BILLY THE 
KID and BILLY THE KID lost 21 points.  You're breakin' my heart.  And if variety is 
the spice of life, ILLIS may be getting bland, as WILD BILL stays top dog in the 
city.  The Warty Toad, humph!  I've tasted better ale at mortuaries.  Where do they 
get this stuff?  From ILLIS' trash dumps?   
     My mother always told me, 'If you don't have anything nice to say, start 
talking.' I loved that woman.  What's the big D?  HANGOVERS was the most avoided 
team?  Bunch of lily livered... grumble... mumble... curse...  And it looks like 
YOUNG GUNS avoided them the most this turn.  What a pack of would be losers, if you 
ask me.  Hmph.  BILLY THE KID was challenged more times this turn than the 
Duelmaster.  Now was the DM insulted or feared?  Heh, heh.   
     Death and Taxes.  The less death I see, the more it taxes my patience.  Let's 
see if anyone's dead or dying.  We're all going to die in the end, so why worry if 
the fate catches up with you sooner that later?   
     I was about to buy a new quill pen the other day, but some fighter took it for 
an epee.  Forgive me for writing with a dagger.  Well, I've had enough of this 
drivel, and I'm sure you have too.  Off like a dirty shirt of padded leather.  Paste 
this one in your scrapbooks, you'll need the kindling come this winter-- Snide 
Clemens  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WILD BILL 2968               11   4  1    80       YOUNG GUNS (316)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-SLIM JIM 2927                 5   0  0    56       SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)
 ALWAYS AN ADDICT 2956         7   4  0    54       BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)
 SEA FOAM 2987                 5   1  0    54       BOOK OF THOMAS (317)
 HUMAN PRETZEL 2926           11  10  4    47       SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BILLY THE KID 2969            7   8  1    33       YOUNG GUNS (316)
-OCEAN SPRAY 2988              3   1  0    29       BOOK OF THOMAS (317)
 DOMME JANA 3006               2   0  1    25       VICIOUS VAMPS (319)
-BABY RUTH 2943                3   2  0    24       SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WYATT EARP 2996               2   2  0    22       YOUNG GUNS (316)
-PILLOW FIGHT 2993             3   1  0    21       BOOK OF THOMAS (317)
 CHERRY 3003                   1   0  0    13       VICIOUS VAMPS (319)
 EVER QUEST 3002               3   1  0    12       BOOK OF THOMAS (317)
 GEMMA 3007                    1   1  0     9       VICIOUS VAMPS (319)
 ANNIE OAKLEY 2990             1   4  0     7       YOUNG GUNS (316)
-NEAPOLITAN 2971               0   1  0     5       SHEWISH MUNCHIES (310)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
BASHAPOCALYPSE 3009     0  1 0 BASHAHOLICS ANON 297 DARK CHAMPION         323  NONE
JUST ONE MORE 3010      0  1 0 BASHAHOLICS ANON 297 HIGH ELF              323  NONE
RECOVERY SETBACK 2951   1  3 0 BASHAHOLICS ANON 297 DOMME JANA 3006       323   
DEEP WATERS 2989        2  3 1 BOOK OF THOMAS 317   BILLY THE KID 2969    322   
HEDIES 3012             0  1 0 BOOK OF THOMAS 317   IRON JUDGEMENT        323  NONE
1ST VAGABOND 3011       0  1 0 YOUNG GUNS 316       RICHARD H.            323  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Sea Foam -- May you disintegrate into nothing. -- Always an Addict

Ocean Spray -- May you be quelled into a calm nothingness. -- Recovery Setback

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

BASHAPOCALYPSE was dealt death by DARK CHAMPION in a 2 minute Dark Arena fight.
1ST VAGABOND was butchered by RICHARD H. in a 1 minute brutal Dark Arena duel.
HEDIES was easily killed by IRON JUDGEMENT in a 1 minute Dark Arena match.
JUST ONE MORE was assassinated by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
WILD BILL bested CONVICTED ASSASSIN in a 2 minute Title fight.
SEA FOAM defeated HUMAN PRETZEL in a 2 minute match.
BILLY THE KID was devastated by ALWAYS AN ADDICT in a 1 minute uneven brawl.
RECOVERY SETBACK was assassinated by DOMME JANA in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
WYATT EARP bested GEMMA in a 2 minute novice's competition.
EVER QUEST overcame ANNIE OAKLEY in a 1 minute beginner's melee.
CHERRY vanquished MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|AIMED BLOW                       5         WALL OF STEEL      3 -   0 -  0     100  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         PARRY-STRIKE       3 -   1 -  0      75  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         BASHING ATTACK    11 -   5 -  1      69  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         LUNGING ATTACK    25 -  14 -  1      64  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         STRIKING ATTACK   17 -  11 -  0      61  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         TOTAL PARRY       10 -   9 -  1      53  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         AIMED BLOW        29 -  30 -  4      49  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   3 -  0       0  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      0         PARRY-LUNGE        0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         SLASHING ATTACK    0 -   4 -  0       0  |

Turn 323 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  2         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  1     AIMED BLOW         1 -  4         3  AIMED BLOW     
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  2     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         3  BASHING ATTACK 
                              PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         1  PARRY-LUNGE    
                              SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  0     
                              TOTAL PARRY        0 -  0     
                              WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       WILD BILL 2968             11   4  1   80 YOUNG GUNS (316)
BASHING ATTACK   ALWAYS AN ADDICT 2956       7   4  0   54 BASHAHOLICS ANON (297)
LUNGING ATTACK   SEA FOAM 2987               5   1  0   54 BOOK OF THOMAS (317)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is WILD BILL 2968.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was WILD BILL 2968.  The ten other most popular fighters were SEA FOAM 2987, ALWAYS 
AN ADDICT 2956, WYATT EARP 2996, BASHAPOCALYPSE 3009, GEMMA 3007, EVER QUEST 3002, 
CHERRY 3003, JUST ONE MORE 3010, HUMAN PRETZEL 2926, and DOMME JANA 3006.

The least popular fighter this week was RECOVERY SETBACK 2951.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were BILLY THE KID 2969, HEDIES 3012, 1ST VAGABOND 3011, ANNIE 
OAKLEY 2990, DOMME JANA 3006, HUMAN PRETZEL 2926, JUST ONE MORE 3010, CHERRY 3003, 
EVER QUEST 3002, and GEMMA 3007.

                                NAME CHANGE-O-RAMA

     The crowd was surprisingly orderly, but it was still a crowd, and the Commission 
clerk, Algernon, looked at it uneasily.  Whenever this many people came together to 
petition for something, it meant trouble.  For him, anyway.  Records to be altered.  
Altering records was Bad.  It made Extra Work.
     His assistant clerk leaned close and whispered, "If it weren't for gladiators, we 
wouldn't have jobs.  Smile at them and ask what they want."
     Algernon closed his eyes briefly.  Looking at this crowd made him dizzy.  They 
were all wearing black and white stripes.  Like a herd of zebras, except that zebras 
didn't carry swords.  Then he took a deep breath and managed a smile.  "What... ah, 
what can I do for you?"
     "We want new names," the first gladiator said.  There was a number on the front 
of his shirt:  0381.  He thumped the number with his thumb.  "This here isn't a 
name--"
     "We want REAL names!"  That voice came from farther back in the crowd.
     "Yeah!  We've paid our dues," another shouted, "and we've EARNED real names!"
     One from the very back yelled, "I want to be called Tom."
     All the others turned to look at him.
     Algernon couldn't see him, but apparently those looks were accusing.  Well, he 
could understand that, "Tom" was such a... common name.
     "My mom called me Tom," the voice in the back protested.  "It's a good name."
     "It isn't the name you put on the petition," 0381 said.  "We talked about this.  
We got our manager's agreement.  You get the name on the petition."
     "But--!"
     Algernon didn't really want to keep staring at all these stripes while they 
argued.  He picked up the petition.  "These names are the ones you want?"
     0381 turned back.  "Yes."
     "It's a lot of trouble, and when other people see that YOU are getting name 
changes, THEY are going to want them--"  Seeing the gladiators beginning to frown... 
and finger their weapons, he went on quickly, "So I figure we might as well make it a 
complete deal.  A Name-Change-O-Rama.  Everyone who wants a name change can petition 
for it.  Get it all over with at once."  He glanced at the petition, shuddered 
slightly, and passed it to his clerk.  "We'll announce it, proclaim it, even, and you 
will get the names on this petition.  And others will get the names THEY think they 
should have had, too."  He paused.  "And I think I'll get a new name, I'm tired of 
being an Algernon...."

                                  *   *   *   *   *  

     Warrior and team name changes will be accepted during the month of March.  If 
you have names you want to change, please contact Customer Service. -- RSI