DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 05/21/2015    Duedate: 06/03/2015

JADE MOUNTAIN ARENA

DM-75    TURN-555

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

SPIRALS
CRITICALS (13)
(75-3613) [17-1-0,110]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

SPIRALS                        MORTY PELLA
CRITICALS (13)                 DEAD MEAT (326)
(75-3613) [17-1-0,110]         (75-3655) [3-0-0,50]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

STONE HAMMER                   BLUEBIRD
SAND DANCERS (67)              RUNEBLADES (194)
(75-3541) [16-34-2,84]         (75-3591) [2-2-0,8]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

SHEWISH BUFFET (297)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. WEIRD STUDENTS (325)        54
2. SHEWISH BUFFET (297)        53      CRITICALS (13)
3. APOKOLIPS (321)             37      Unchartered Team
4. DEAD MEAT (326)             26
5. RUNEBLADES (194)            22      DEAD MEAT (326)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*DEAD MEAT (326)            3   0  0  100   1/ 3 SHEWISH BUFFET (297)      9  4 2
 2/ 2 CRITICALS (13)           163  92 10 63.9   2/ 1 CRITICALS (13)            6  3 0
 3/ 0*WEIRD STUDENTS (325)       3   2  0 60.0   3/ 2 SAND DANCERS (67)         5 10 0
 4/ 0 RUNEBLADES (194)         105 101  5 51.0   4/ 4 APOKOLIPS (321)           4  4 0
 5/ 3 APOKOLIPS (321)           28  35  2 44.4   5/ 5*DEAD MEAT (326)           3  0 0
 6/ 4 SAND DANCERS (67)        %1111 %1561 32 41.6   6/ 0*WEIRD STUDENTS (325)      3  2 0
 7/ 5 SHEWISH BUFFET (297)      29  64  3 31.2   7/ 0 RUNEBLADES (194)          1  4 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

     "WILL you stop tramping around like that, 'Lark?"  Han Kang looked up from the 
letter he was laboring over.  Han Kang was not a natural letter writer, but he had 
promised somebody--he wouldn't say who--that he would write once a month without fail.  
He always left it till the last moment, and it always made him cranky, but he always 
did it.  "If you can't settle down to do something useful, why not go to bed?  It's 
dark enough."
     "It's raining.  I can't sleep when it rains."  Meadowlark's voice said that this 
should be obvious to anybody with half a brain, but she wasn't sure Han Kan fell into 
that category.  She went back to her pacing.
     Han Kang looked at the rest of his teammates, eyebrows raised in question.
     Stonefall shrugged.  "She always says that, and I've never seen her sleep in the 
rain.  Ah, when it's raining, whether she's out in it or not."  Some of his teammates, 
Chi Ho came to mind, got really picky about proper phrasing.  "I don't know why, but 
do you remember the time last fall when it rained for six days steadily?  She was a 
WRECK by the end of it."
     "It can't be healthy," Stone Hammer said, looking up from the leather belt she 
was working on.  "Have you been to a doctor about it?"
     "What would a doctor know?  Flatlanders."  Meadowlark paused to stare out the 
window for a moment.  "I asked the Arenamaster about it.  In case it was, well, you 
know."
     "I don't know," Han Kang said.  "Tell me."
     "You could never understand."
     Han Kang made a rude sound.  "My great-grandmother, mother's mother's mother, was 
said to change into a fox at the full moon.  My father's father was perfectly normal, 
though, so long as you didn't bring cold iron near him."
     Meadowlark turned clear around to face him.  "I didn't know any of that--"
     "Would you talk about it to anyone?  I told Jorja, and Arenamaster Kendar, just 
in case.  You know."
     She blushed.  "Oh.  Well, okay."  She came and sat down across from him.  "I'm 
not sure where to start.  Arenamaster Kendar says it's a syzygy or something that's, 
um, getting closer?  Something astrological piling up like storm clouds, anyway.  
And... I don't know quite where it comes in my family, but my mother and her people 
have always lived close to water, over in Daroja Province, and, well, sometimes 
things, um, change.  Just a little.  Sometimes THEY change just a little.  People say 
they're witches.  I don't think they are, but if enough people say it, well, that's 
why I came here.  Close enough to be sort of familiar, far enough away that maybe the 
stories hadn't crossed the mountains.  And if something happened, I figured 
Arenamaster Kendar could cope with it."  She came to a stop.
     "And something has happened," Stonefall prompted.  "Did he cope?"
     "Not really.  He said *I* had to cope with it.  I think I'm going to have to go 
on a quest.  Back to Daroja, for sure."  She closed her eyes.  "Maybe farther.  I 
don't want to leave here!"
     "If he said you had to, then you do.  We can help, can't we?  I always wanted to 
see other places...."

                                      SPY REPORT

     So why do I have this bag over my head?  Because I am The Unknown Spymaster and 
I'm going to give you a spy report!.  Say good-bye to CRITICALS, as they are pushed 
from the coveted top team spot by the SHEWISH BUFFET stable.  APOKOLIPS is no joke as 
it posted a 3-1-0 week advancing from 4th place to 4th place.  Hey everybody, watch 
out for BLUE PLATE SPECIAL, who flew up 30 points in the rankings after mashing CHI 
HO like a melon.  Keep your eye on this guy.  Ya know, some days it doesn't pay to 
walk out on the sands.  ANGRY LIGHTNING was bested by ENCANTADORA and drops 12 
points.  Going for the gusto and coming up with aught but bloody knuckles was 
RUNEBLADES' GRUS, who was turned away from the Duelmastership by SPIRALS.  4 out of 5 
gladiators surveyed protect the body, so try and avoid aiming at that location.   
     But enough of that bunch, let's get on to the wimps who like to avoid battle!  
And hey, kiddies, those of you who didn't avoid SHEWISH BUFFET, please raise you 
hand.  Wow.  Does JADE MOUNTAIN really have that many liars?  For those of you who 
like math, try this one:  SHEWISH BUFFET + Weapons That go Boom = DEAD MEAT + Avoid 
City.  And who is this STONEFALL you ask, with 54 points and a 15-9-0 record.  Ooh, 
the tales I could tell!   
     Death is kind of like a new puppy:  he's always around wanting to play.  (Ha 
Zontani, how's that for a wise saying?).  This round goes to SHEWISH BUFFET, their 
6-0-1 warrior, BLUE PLATE SPECIAL slew the 12-7-0 CHI HO.  Stay tuned next week to 
see what happens.  Ask not the elves for counsel, for they will say both yes and no.  
Silly buggers, eh?   
     Well, there's the manager of the JADE MOUNTAIN giving me the 'cut' sign (or is 
that 'They're going to strangle you in the alley?).  Okay, so I may not be the 
world's best comedian, but then you guys aren't the world's best warriors.  Hasta la 
bye-bye.  (Loud choruses of 'Beat it, ya bum!')-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SPIRALS 3613                 17   1  0   110       CRITICALS (13)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BLUE PLATE SPECIAL 3413       6   0  1   100       SHEWISH BUFFET (297)
 STRAWBERRY JHANS 3403         8   2  0    99       SHEWISH BUFFET (297)
 GRUS 3547                    12   4  0    96       RUNEBLADES (194)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 STONE HAMMER 3541            16  34  2    84       SAND DANCERS (67)
-SECURE DEFENS 490             3   3  0    74       CRITICALS (13)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HOUND ARCHON 3617             7   6  0    66       APOKOLIPS (321)
 MEADOWLARK 3587              13  12  1    57       SAND DANCERS (67)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 STONEFALL 3592               15   9  0    54       SAND DANCERS (67)
 HAN KANG 3569                11  21  0    54       SAND DANCERS (67)
-HORRIFYING ATTACK 3621        3   0  0    51       CRITICALS (13)
 ENCANTADORA 3620              6   6  0    50       APOKOLIPS (321)
 MORTY PELLA 3655              3   0  0    50       DEAD MEAT (326)
 CODE THIRTEEN 3572            4   5  0    36       RUNEBLADES (194)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-PSYKLOP 3634                  5   3  1    28       APOKOLIPS (321)
 ANGRY LIGHTNING 3627          7   4  0    27       CRITICALS (13)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MS. SMOKEY MOON 3633          3   6  0    21       APOKOLIPS (321)
 RATANTOUILLE 3453             2   1  0    19       SHEWISH BUFFET (297)
 KRAC SHIELDBORN 3603          1   0  0    19       RUNEBLADES (194)
 RUDE RICK 3646                1   0  0    13       WEIRD STUDENTS (325)
 MOODY MARK 3645               1   0  0    13       WEIRD STUDENTS (325)
 MESSY MATHEW 3644             0   1  0    13       WEIRD STUDENTS (325)
 ICED TI 3642                  2   1  1    11       SHEWISH BUFFET (297)
 SOUR SAM 3647                 1   0  0    10       WEIRD STUDENTS (325)
 BLUEBIRD 3591                 2   2  0     8       RUNEBLADES (194)
 ROUGH ROSI 3648               0   1  0     5       WEIRD STUDENTS (325)
 ROCK BOTTOM 3604              0   1  0     3       RUNEBLADES (194)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
CHUCK E. CHEESE 3653    0  2 0 APOKOLIPS 321        ICED TI 3642          555   
DA1 3661                0  1 0 CRITICALS 13         DAR-KOL BLACKBRO      555  NONE
CHI HO 3612            12  7 0 SAND DANCERS 67      BLUE PLATE SPECI 3413 555   

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Spirals -- I've finally figured out what you need:  cheese sauce!  Although marinara 
sauce might also work. -- Stone Hammer

Strawberry Jhans -- I have a weakness for your tarts. -- Stonefall

Blue Plate Special -- Oog.  Note to self:  don't eat so much next time. -- Han Kang

Hound Archon -- Well, I didn't expect that to work!  I'd never heard of "dog nip" 
before. -- Chi Ho

And a standby, for which I am grateful.  I just wasn't concentrating today. -- 
Meadowlark

Strawberry Jhans -- And you definitely tasted deliciously like strawberries. -- Stone 
Hammer

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DA1 was butchered by DAR-KOL BLACKBROWS in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
HOUND ARCHON devastated STONEFALL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
CHUCK E. CHEESE was put to death by ICED TI in a 2 minute novice's Challenge match.
SPIRALS won victory over GRUS in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Title brawl.
CHI HO was assassinated by BLUE PLATE SPECIAL in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
STONE HAMMER was devastated by STRAWBERRY JHANS in a 1 minute uneven brawl.
ANGRY LIGHTNING was overpowered by ENCANTADORA in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
HAN KANG was handily defeated by MORTY PELLA in a action packed 1 minute uneven fight.
CODE THIRTEEN lost to MEADOWLARK in a popular 1 minute duel.
MS. SMOKEY MOON vanquished GUARDSMAN TAN in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
BLUEBIRD was luckily beaten by MOODY MARK in a popular 7 minute gory beginner's match.
RATANTOUILLE demolished ROUGH ROSI in a 1 minute mismatched match.
RUDE RICK handily defeated GUARDSMAN TAN in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
SOUR SAM demolished ROCK BOTTOM in a 1 minute one-sided brawl.
MESSY MATHEW was unbelievably bested by KRAC SHIELDBORN in a 3 minute conflict.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  7         TOTAL PARRY       12 -   0 -  0     100  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   6         LUNGING ATTACK    19 -  10 -  3      66  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         AIMED BLOW         7 -   4 -  0      64  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         STRIKING ATTACK   19 -  11 -  2      63  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -   1 -  0      50  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         WALL OF STEEL     10 -  15 -  0      40  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         PARRY-STRIKE       5 -   8 -  1      38  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         BASHING ATTACK    16 -  27 -  0      37  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         PARRY-LUNGE        0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         SLASHING ATTACK    0 -   5 -  0       0  |

Turn 555 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  4         3  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  0     BASHING ATTACK     1 -  5         2  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         2  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  2     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  WALL OF STEEL  
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  1         1  AIMED BLOW     
                                                                1  SLASHING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      SPIRALS 3613               17   1  0  110 CRITICALS (13)
STRIKING ATTACK  BLUE PLATE SPECIAL 3413     6   0  1  100 SHEWISH BUFFET (297)
AIMED BLOW       STRAWBERRY JHANS 3403       8   2  0   99 SHEWISH BUFFET (297)
SLASHING ATTACK  GRUS 3547                  12   4  0   96 RUNEBLADES (194)
BASHING ATTACK   HOUND ARCHON 3617           7   6  0   66 APOKOLIPS (321)
WALL OF STEEL    MEADOWLARK 3587            13  12  1   57 SAND DANCERS (67)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   MORTY PELLA 3655            3   0  0   50 DEAD MEAT (326)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is STONE HAMMER 3541.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was BLUEBIRD 3591.  The ten other most popular fighters were GRUS 3547, MESSY 
MATHEW 3644, MORTY PELLA 3655, ENCANTADORA 3620, CODE THIRTEEN 3572, MEADOWLARK 3587, 
RATANTOUILLE 3453, KRAC SHIELDBORN 3603, HOUND ARCHON 3617, and CHUCK E. CHEESE 3653.

The least popular fighter this week was ROCK BOTTOM 3604.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were ROUGH ROSI 3648, MOODY MARK 3645, CHI HO 3612, STONEFALL 3592, 
DA1 3661, SOUR SAM 3647, RUDE RICK 3646, MS. SMOKEY MOON 3633, HAN KANG 3569, and 
ANGRY LIGHTNING 3627.

                             * * * * *   MEMO  * * * * *

From:       The Office of Accurate Census Reporting, Gladiatorial Commission
To:         All Managers

In the interest of preserving our natural resources and preventing managerial writer's 
cramp, the census form has been eliminated, effective immediately.  Managers may 
register their warriors' races and/or favorite sayings by simply writing them on a 
separate piece of paper and submitting them to the Commission.  Each warrior may have 
up to 15 favorite sayings.  Each saying must be categorized Jeer, Gloat, Boredom, Ouch, 
Victory and may be up to 70 characters long.  For any questions, please contact the 
Gladiatorial Commission.