DARKHOLM SPORTING JOURNAL

Date   : 11/15/2014    Duedate: 11/28/2014

DARKHOLM ARENA

DM 104    TURN 649

RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    %  RANK TEAMS                 W    L   K    % 
  1-TOON INN 21/1355     472  192   4 71.1    3 BRUTAL LEGIO 7/1335   70   68   0 50.7
    THOSE WHO RULE 12/1352                      LEGION OF LEGEND 62/1305
    GLAD TO MEAT YOU 41/1359                  4 THE MENTORS 10/408   155  152   4 50.5
  2 MAJOR BUMMER 3/1368  240  172   3 58.3      MASTERS OF MELODY 21/1346
    MY MAIN MEN 84/1363                         THE MENTORS' TOY BOX 10/1350
    A PROPER SALUTE 84/1364                   5 HIGHLANDERS 42/1341  616  767  10 44.5
    DEALER'S CHOICE 42/1360                   6 JOHNS 5/927         1536 2782  27 35.6
    IN THE LONG RUN 84/1367                     THE LADY'S LIST 6/917

                             REPORT FROM WITHIN THE TOWER

Hullo!

     The fighting was good this turn, as fighting goes, rather painful for some of
those involved, of course.  The fights were interesting to watch, at least... but
there were so few of them.  I wonder if our arena is going to be disbanded.  I've
heard that there is some interest in roofing over the center and using the fight ring
and bleachers as a grain silo.  Sometimes I wonder if that's why the arena was built
so high and steep, to make it possible to convert it to another use.  However,
farming certainly isn't a big industry around here, and I certainly can't see a
promising future for the arena as wool silo, nor as a fish silo...  Maybe it can be
used to store grain imported from the mainland?  Ah, that might work.
     At any rate, there were only nine fights.  Three of them featured stand-ins, but
luckily this time we didn't see the controversial Mr Tower or Mr. Cholera.

     TOLAIS DEEPHEART (42-1620) (158-158-0,218) of HIGHLANDERS fought BLIND BEGGAR
(104-26) (40-35-0,200) of The Invincibles.  TOLAIS DEEPHEART bested BLIND BEGGAR in a
crowd pleasing 1 minute Title fight.  Ms Deepheart is our top-rated Wall of Steel,
and, in the absence of King of Darkholm, she is also our Keeper of the Runeblade.

     ZAKAU (5-4623) (74-79-0,201) of JOHNS fought NO LIMIT HOLD-EM (42-2887) (34-20-
2,185) of DEALER'S CHOICE.  ZAKAU vanquished NO LIMIT HOLD-EM in an exciting 1 minute
gory uneven battle.  In addition to being the top Lunger, Zakau is our overall
popularity leader, taking that title away from Ms Deepheart.
     PELIS THE TRUE (42-3469) (54-75-1,190) of HIGHLANDERS fought LAUGHING BARMAID
(104-9) (0-0-0,170) of The Invincibles.  PELIS THE TRUE was vanquished by LAUGHING
BARMAID in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.  Mr. True is the top-ranked Basher, an easy
style indeed for a laughing barmaid to defeat.  I've seen it many times.
     STRAP ON (10-5254) (34-23-1,198) of THE MENTORS' TOY BOX fought ADOLPH EICHMANN
(84-37835) (32-25-0,157) of MY MAIN MEN.  STRAP ON overpowered ADOLPH EICHMANN in a
crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.  Mr. On is our best Slasher.
     BORF (84-37868) (28-29-0,180) of A PROPER SALUTE fought BONHAM (21-7738) (23-15-
1,127) of MASTERS OF MELODY.  BORF won victory over BONHAM in an crowd pleasing 1
minute brutal fight.  Borf is top Parry-Lunger, while Bonham is our premier, and
only, Aimed Blow.

     ZEUS (62-4010) (50-28-0,148) of LEGION OF LEGEND fought CAPTURED CUTPURSE (104-
6) (0-0-0,130) of The Invincibles.  ZEUS outwaited CAPTURED CUTPURSE in a popular 8
minute gruesome competition.
     PHILTHRY (42-2079) (59-46-0,150) of HIGHLANDERS fought MIKEL (6-6190) (55-64-
3,148) of THE LADY'S LIST.  PHILTHRY lost to MIKEL in an action packed 3 minute duel.
Neither of these fighters is a stylemaster.  How strange!
     FATALITY (7-5820) (41-35-0,133) of BRUTAL LEGION fought OMAHA (42-4796) (21-10-
1,98) of DEALER'S CHOICE.  FATALITY vanquished OMAHA in a 1 minute uneven fight.
Fatality is top Striker.
     HILLARY (10-6261) (19-17-0,75) of THE MENTORS fought KODICROME (84-37861) (16-
12-1,62) of IN THE LONG RUN.  HILLARY was viciously subdued by KODICROME in a popular
3 minute brutal fight.

     That, I'm afraid, is all there is to say.  I hope you all have a pleasant, if
chilly, fortnight.  Be back for the big feast in two weeks, eh?

Malic of Talcama

KEEPER OF THE RUNEBLADE        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 TOLAIS DEEPHEART 42-1620    159 158     227  HIGHLANDERS (1341)         RODEKI

GRAND CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-KING OF DARKHOLM 12-4856     63  43  1  331  THOSE WHO RULE (1352)      RIZTAB
-PROFESSOR GRIM 10-2613       41  36     219  THE MENTORS (408)          KOLACT
 ZAKAU 5-4623                 75  79     217  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS

GRAND CHAMPIONS                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 STRAP ON 10-5254             35  23  1  205  THE MENTORS' TOY BOX (1350)KOLACT
 BORF 84-37868                29  29     182  A PROPER SALUTE (1364)     BLACKSTONE

GRAND CHALLENGER ADEPTS        W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 NO LIMIT HOLD-EM 42-2887     34  21  2  179  DEALER'S CHOICE (1360)     RODEKI
 PELIS THE TRUE 42-3469       54  76  1  170  HIGHLANDERS (1341)         RODEKI
 MIKEL 6-6190                 56  64  3  164  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 ADOLPH EICHMANN 84-37835     32  26     160  MY MAIN MEN (1363)         BLACKSTONE

GRAND ADEPTS                   W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ZEUS 62-4010                 51  28     150  LEGION OF LEGEND (1305)    VALAMANTIS
 PHILTHRY 42-2079             59  47     147  HIGHLANDERS (1341)         RODEKI
 FATALITY 7-5820              42  35     141  BRUTAL LEGION (1335)       BONSUR
 BONHAM 21-7738               23  16  1  135  MASTERS OF MELODY (1346)   SUNSET

GRAND CHALLENGER INITIATES     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 OMAHA 42-4796                21  11  1   99  DEALER'S CHOICE (1360)     RODEKI

GRAND INITIATES                W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
-PORTERHOUSE ARREST 41-4059   42  30  1   83  GLAD TO MEAT YOU (1359)    KATI-TEI
 KODICROME 84-37861           17  12  1   78  IN THE LONG RUN (1367)     BLACKSTONE
 HILLARY 10-6261              19  18      64  THE MENTORS (408)          KOLACT
-GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE 21-7642 22   6      55  TOON INN (1355)            SUNSET
-JURY DUTY 3-4800             14   8  3   53  MAJOR BUMMER (1368)        OSKSI

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                   W   L  K TEAM NAME              SLAIN BY                  TURN

                               PERSONAL CORRESPONDENCE

Malic and Editor -- In my case, it has absolutely nothing to do with the size of the
arena.  Heck, I like small arenas...nice and cozy!  Not what I'm talking about AT
ALL!  If I have to fight extras because the arena is small...I really don't mind.
What I'm complaining about *specifically* is extras that are impossible to beat.  The
answer is incredibly simple:  either have those extras removed from the games, or
perhaps "maim" them in such a way that their overall abilities are at a more
reasonable level.  Case in point: L'il Red.  TC'd ADM; went 7-3 Eligibles; went 6-3
Eligibles; won every fight in Darkholm...except...two losses to extras.  She has been

run off due to fear of running into Dirk Cholera again...or worse yet...perhaps that
Ferd fellow.  That's just ridiculous.  Li'l Red WOULD have been active this turn if
the extras had been removed; that is a fact! -- Alfredo

     Mr. Frothingslosh -- I am sorry.  But I have little influence with the Lady,
     most likely because I am not very knowledgeable about gladiatorial strategies.
     Whether your complaint has merit or not, I really don't know, but my opinion is
     not important.  I know that the issue makes you unhappy, and I sympathize, but
     it is the Lady, and she alone, who decides whether Ferd the Tower and Dirk
     Cholera will continue to serve in the arena or not.  I wish you luck. -- Malic

Strap On -- Meh.  Talent wins out in the end, I guess. -- Pelis the True

Borf -- Thanks to you, I have an even record again.  That wasn't a very good matchup
for you. -- Tolais Deepheart

Bonham -- Blows to a joint are always painful, aren't they?  Hope you feel better by
now. -- Philthry

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

TOLAIS DEEPHEART bested BLIND BEGGAR in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Title fight.
ZAKAU vanquished NO LIMIT HOLD-EM in a exciting 1 minute gory uneven battle.
PELIS THE TRUE was vanquished by LAUGHING BARMAID in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
STRAP ON overpowered ADOLPH EICHMANN in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.
BORF won victory over BONHAM in a crowd pleasing 1 minute brutal fight.
ZEUS outwaited CAPTURED CUTPURSE in a popular 8 minute gruesome competition.
PHILTHRY lost to MIKEL in a action packed 3 minute duel.
FATALITY vanquished OMAHA in a 1 minute uneven fight.
HILLARY was viciously subdued by KODICROME in a popular 3 minute brutal fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   3         PARRY-STRIKE       9 -   4 -  0      69  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         LUNGING ATTACK    29 -  20 -  0      59  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         SLASHING ATTACK   30 -  22 -  1      58  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         WALL OF STEEL     19 -  21 -  0      48  |
|AIMED BLOW                       2         AIMED BLOW        10 -  13 -  0      43  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         PARRY-LUNGE        9 -  12 -  0      43  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         STRIKING ATTACK    9 -  12 -  0      43  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         TOTAL PARRY        4 -   9 -  0      31  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -   3 -  0      25  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      0         BASHING ATTACK     4 -  12 -  1      25  |

Turn 649 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  2         3  WALL OF STEEL  
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         3  SLASHING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      2 -  1     BASHING ATTACK     0 -  1         2  PARRY-LUNGE    
PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  1     TOTAL PARRY        0 -  0         1  BASHING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    TOLAIS DEEPHEART 42-1620  159 158  0  227 HIGHLANDERS (1341)
LUNGING ATTACK   ZAKAU 5-4623               75  79  0  217 JOHNS (927)
SLASHING ATTACK  STRAP ON 10-5254           35  23  1  205 THE MENTORS' TOY BOX (1350)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-LUNGE      BORF 84--27668             29  29  0  182 A PROPER SALUTE (1364)
BASHING ATTACK   PELIS THE TRUE 42-3469     54  76  1  170 HIGHLANDERS (1341)
PARRY-STRIKE     PHILTHRY 42-2079           59  47  0  147 HIGHLANDERS (1341)
STRIKING ATTACK  FATALITY 7-5820            42  35  0  141 BRUTAL LEGION (1335)
AIMED BLOW       BONHAM 21-7738             23  16  1  135 MASTERS OF MELODY (1346)

The overall popularity leader is ZAKAU 5-4623.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was MIKEL 6-6190.  The ten other most popular fighters were ZAKAU 5-4623, KODICROME 
84--27675, STRAP ON 10-5254, BORF 84--27668, PHILTHRY 42-2079, TOLAIS DEEPHEART 
42-1620, ZEUS 62-4010, FATALITY 7-5820, BONHAM 21-7738, and HILLARY 10-6261.

The least popular fighter this week was OMAHA 42-4796.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were ADOLPH EICHMANN 84--27701, PELIS THE TRUE 42-3469, NO LIMIT HOLD-EM 
42-2887, HILLARY 10-6261, BONHAM 21-7738, FATALITY 7-5820, ZEUS 62-4010, TOLAIS 
DEEPHEART 42-1620, PHILTHRY 42-2079, and BORF 84--27668.

Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  Arena (Number)       W  L K  
KALTOS(5)            1  0 0  KOLACT(10)           1  1 0  VALAMANTIS(62)       1  0 0  
TRANSEL(6)           1  0 0  SUNSET(21)           0  1 0  BLACKSTONE(84)       2  1 0  
BONSUR(7)            1  0 0  RODEKI(42)           1  4 0  

TOP WARRIOR OF EACH ARENA     W   L  K PNTS  TEAM NAME                  CITY           
 ZAKAU 5-4623                75  79  0  217  JOHNS (927)                KALTOS
 MIKEL 6-6190                56  64  3  164  THE LADY'S LIST (917)      TRANSEL
 FATALITY 7-5820             42  35  0  141  BRUTAL LEGION (1335)       BONSUR
 STRAP ON 10-5254            35  23  1  205  THE MENTORS' TOY BOX (1350 KOLACT
 BONHAM 21-7738              23  16  1  135  MASTERS OF MELODY (1346)   SUNSET
 TOLAIS DEEPHEART 42-1620   159 158  0  227  HIGHLANDERS (1341)         RODEKI
 ZEUS 62-4010                51  28  0  150  LEGION OF LEGEND (1305)    VALAMANTIS
 BORF 84--27668              29  29  0  182  A PROPER SALUTE (1364)     BLACKSTONE

                             * * * * *   MEMO  * * * * *

From:       The Office of Accurate Census Reporting, Gladiatorial Commission
To:         All Managers

In the interest of preserving our natural resources and preventing managerial writer's 
cramp, census forms will be provided for warriors by request only, effective 
immediately.  Managers may register their warriors' races and/or favorite sayings by 
simply writing them on a separate piece of paper and submitting them to the 
Commission.  Each warrior may have up to 15 favorite sayings.  Each saying must be 
categorized Jeer, Gloat, Boredom, Ouch, Victory and may be up to 80 characters long.  
For any questions, please contact the Gladiatorial Commission.