DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 04/03/2006    Duedate: 04/15/2006

MORDANT ARENA

DM-1    TURN-542

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

MESSIAH
MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
(1-7607) [16-3-3,142]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

HELLACIOUS                     ENURAM
MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)         DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
(1-7541) [17-3-0,194]          (1-7851) [2-0-2,33]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

BELESARIUS                     NITE TRAIN
ROMAN EMPIRE (531)             GUNS-N-ROSES (314)
(1-7122) [19-23-1,81]          (1-6583) [10-9-3,111]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

SWEORDMASTERS (138)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. SWEORDMASTERS (138)         48
2. AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)      39      LAME SUPERHEROES (516)
3. DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)       32      Unchartered Team
4. LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)       28
5. HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)     28      AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 6*AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)     5   2  1 71.4   1/ 1 SWEORDMASTERS (138)       9  5 0
 2/ 1*DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)      7   3  2 70.0   2/ 2 DEATH'S DOOR (129)        8  7 0
 3/ 0 LAME SUPERHEROES (516)    12   6  2 66.7   3/10*DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)     7  3 2
 4/ 2*SEA DOGS (575)             9   5  0 64.3   4/ 7 WIND STORM (144)          7  5 0
 5/ 4 DEATH'S DOOR (129)        58  46  1 55.8   5/ 6*SEA DOGS (575)            6  4 0
 6/ 5 SWEORDMASTERS (138)      389 368 50 51.4   6/ 5 LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)     6  6 0
 7/ 7 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)   143 143 21 50.0   7/ 8*JGW'S DARKNESS (574)      6  9 1
 8/ 3*JGW'S DARKNESS (574)      10  10  2 50.0   8/14*AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)    5  2 1
 9/ 9 LETHAL HERITAGE (572)     23  24  2 48.9   9/ 4 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)    5  3 0
10/10 LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)    299 328 29 47.7  10/ 9 HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)   5  8 0
11/11 ROMAN EMPIRE (531)       241 269 16 47.3  11/ 3 ROMAN EMPIRE (531)        5 10 0
12/ 8*STEEL LEGION (581)        14  16  0 46.7  12/11*STEEL LEGION (581)        3  3 0
13/12 WIND STORM (144)         428 534 30 44.5  13/12 LETHAL HERITAGE (572)     3  4 0
14/13*VORTEX (571)              16  22  2 42.1  14/18*JGW'S ABSTRACT (573)      2  7 0
15/14 HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)  439 661 13 39.9  15/13*VORTEX (571)              2  8 0
16/16 GUNS-N-ROSES (314)        55  94  9 36.9  16/15 GUNS-N-ROSES (314)        1  2 0
17/18*JGW'S ABSTRACT (573)      11  23  0 32.4  17-16*JGW PERISHABLE (409)      1  4 0
18-17*JGW PERISHABLE (409)       4   9  0 30.8  18-17*BAM BAMX (577)            0  1 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19-19*BAM BAMX (577)             1  10  0  9.1  19-20*POKER GREATS (580)        0  1 0
20-20*POKER GREATS (580)         0   1  0  0.0  20/ 0 LAME SUPERHEROES (516)    0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 541): MESSIAH of MANNEQUIN'S BEST (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 425): GOLDEN SHARK of THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 549): HEARTS of GAMES LIBRARY (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 545): FORK BALL of F BALLS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 544): SAMANTHA FOX of PARTY ANIMALS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 548): JUSTIN of THE LADY'S LIST (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 545): PINK NOSE of WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 540): SADIE of SPRINGBORN (Still, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 531): ODDLY SHAPED BOOB of CENTER FOR OLDS (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 530): SCYTHE of GRIM FANDANGO (Stik, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 504): OLIVE OYL of OLD SCHOOL TOONS (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 494): GROUCHO of U.A.K. (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 219): HOT AIR DUCK of DUCKS UNLIMITED (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 482): FOUR OF SPADES of COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 430): ZALGEI of DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 205): NICKLEBACK of MILLENIUM METAL (Street Legal, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 193): SOUL SCOURGE of VILE REAVERS (Bobby Bigfoot, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 379): DIED of SRETSAMLEUD (Phat Phat, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 170): 2 PHAT 2 of VERMIN (Sultan, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 423): BOB, ETERNAL of SANDS OF TIME from CLIFFHOME (The Muffin
                             Man, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 541): SWEORDMASTERS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 425): THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 549): GAMES LIBRARY (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 545): DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 544): SPORTS GREATS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 548): THE LADY'S LIST (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 545): WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 540): QUBIT (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 531): SHEPHERDS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 530): D.R.I. (Var, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 504): OLD SCHOOL TOONS (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 494): U.A.K. (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 219): CRIMINAL ELEMENT (Fizban, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 482): COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 430): RONIN (Rosebud, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 205): none
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 193): ISLANDERS (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 379): LEGION OF LEGEND (Seraphim, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 170): MILCHAMAH (Hammer, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 423): BLACK PRIMERS, etc. (Doc Steele, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 544): ALL LICKERED UP of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 544): NORLE PARTH of THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (Nick, mgr.)
               (turn 543): HOFFA of JOHNS (Dear, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 531): ODDLY SHAPED BOOB of CENTER FOR OLDS (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 504): OLIVE OYL of OLD SCHOOL TOONS (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 494): GROUCHO of U.A.K. (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
                  (turn 493): HARANDUR of JINDA-BAN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 481): KANGAROO LIFEBOAT of COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 429): SPIDER-MAN of WENSINWASIN M.H. (Youngblood, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 204): SILVERBOLT of RUNNING AMOK (THawk, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 193): SOUL SCOURGE of VILE REAVERS (Bobby Bigfoot, mgr.)
                          WIMPIRA of ISLANDERS (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (170): MAKKEH KILLER of MILCHAMAH (Hammer, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Good day, friends and fiends, welcome to your friendly neighborhood spyreport.  
I doubt MORDANT will ever be the same.  Now keep the taverns open late tonight, for 
there are sorrows to drown for ROMAN EMPIRE, whose 1-4-0 this turn dropped them by 8 
into 11th.  DESOLATE TEMPLE stable has parlayed this turn's 3-2-1 into a 7 space move 
up the rankings.  This brings them up to 3rd place.  Good work, guys!  The AGENTS OF 
ISIRIS guild has had a 4-1-1 turn and deserves to be watched in the future.  You 
never know where this kind of thing can lead.  And let's see, SALAMANDER fought 
STUPENDOUS MAN and gained 24 points and contributed to WIND STORM's 2-2-0.  
STUPENDOUS MAN has lost to SALAMANDER, falling 13 points, while helping make LAME 
SUPERHEROES a 0-1-0 turn.  The attempts to dethrone the Duelmaster have failed, and 
MESSIAH remains MORDANT's top warrior for another turn.  Tell me, is nothing sacred?  
I have heard from unimpeachable sources that Conan's Place uses trolls in their stew. 
Talk about gristle!   
     Oriental wise man once say, 'Hiding behind shields prevents proper sun tanning.' 
Inscrutable, but true.  DESOLATE TEMPLE has cause to stand tall, as they were 
MORDANT's most avoided team.  A smart manager knows this is a team to beat.  And 
guess who avoided DESOLATE TEMPLE stable the most?  Believe it or not, it was AGENTS 
OF ISIRIS.  Anyone surprised?  Well, sports fans, take notice that OLD FART from 
DEATH'S DOOR was MORDANT's most challenged warrior this turn.  In a brave attempt, 
KANDRIS from WIND STORM challenged up 25 points to fight OLD FART from the DEATH'S 
DOOR stable.  KANDRIS perhaps got his just desserts, seeing as he lost to OLD FART 
and ended up with 60 recognition points.  CONNAVAR of AGENTS OF ISIRIS had better 
have a good reason for challenging down 9 points in a challenge which he won.  I 
thought CONNAVAR showed great skill and promise when he overcame FROST.  All right, 
so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     The Dark Arena is for those who cannot win, not who cannot lose with grace.  
Dignity in life or death is the warrior's creed.  DEATH'S DOOR made what looks to be 
a tough decision this turn, as they sent S.S.'S TWIN, with a record of 8-6-0, to 
S.S.'S TWIN death.  Farewell, his.  Now it looks like JENNIFER is gone, and forgotten 
too, now that VOID did not revenge SWEORDMASTERS' HREOWAN for killing JENNIFER.  Is 
it really true that MORDANT has more dishwashers per capita that fighters?  Just 
thought I'd ask...   
     I like this place, MORDANT, the taverns have old wine, and young serving girls.  
Who could ask for more?  Well, I'm burning daylight here in MORDANT and I've a long 
road ahead of me.  Happy Trails.  Until the sun next rises and my pen sets to paper-- 
Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MESSIAH 7607                 16   3  3   142       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HELLACIOUS 7541              17   3  0   194       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
-HREOWAN 7669                 10   2  2   130       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
 TERCERO ENCANTO 7635         12   1  1   117       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
 NITE TRAIN 6583              10   9  3   111       GUNS-N-ROSES (314)
 MISCHIEVOUS IMP 7627         16   4  2    95       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
 CARACALLA 7115                9   6  0    94       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SPEEDWELL 7667               10   3  0    92       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
 KILL ME PLEASE 1721          15   6  0    91       DEATH'S DOOR (129)
 OLD FART 1723                14   7  0    91       DEATH'S DOOR (129)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BELESARIUS 7122              19  23  1    81       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
 OLD HAG 4086                  9   6  0    81       DEATH'S DOOR (129)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-CATIFF 7734                   5   1  0    66       LETHAL HERITAGE (572)
 KANDRIS 6612                 11  14  1    60       WIND STORM (144)
 CLODIUS AESOPUS 7116          9  10  0    60       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
-MY MICHELLE 6652              1   1  0    60       GUNS-N-ROSES (314)
 JIMMY WONG 7674               9   3  1    59       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LAN 6724                      7   9  0    56       WIND STORM (144)
 ROOKIE MANAGER 7639          11  19  1    53       HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)
 DAEL 7696                     7   1  1    53       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
 BLACK PLAGUE 1720             9  12  0    49       DEATH'S DOOR (129)
 SALAMANDER 7769               6   3  1    48       WIND STORM (144)
 STUPENDOUS MAN 6996           8   4  1    41       LAME SUPERHEROES (516)
 WOEBEGONE 7795                3   2  0    41       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
 BRUJAH 7730                   6   3  1    40       LETHAL HERITAGE (572)
 BOOMER 7741                   8   4  0    37       WIND STORM (144)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ENURAM 7851                   2   0  2    33       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
-ROCKET QUEEN 6674             4   2  1    31       GUNS-N-ROSES (314)
-GANGREL 7733                  3   2  0    30       LETHAL HERITAGE (572)
-LAST REBEL 5896               3   2  0    29       JGW PERISHABLE (409)
 T.S. TALON VOLKSIE 7740       6   3  1    28       VORTEX (571)
-VENTRUE 7731                  2   1  0    28       LETHAL HERITAGE (572)
-COBALT 7784                   4   2  0    27       STEEL LEGION (581)
-GOLD 7787                     4   0  0    27       STEEL LEGION (581)
 BEERIN BOTTLEMAN 7802         3   4  0    27       HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)
-TUNGSTEN 7788                 4   4  0    26       STEEL LEGION (581)
 REDBEARD 7728                 3   1  0    26       SEA DOGS (575)
 BASKET CASE 7722              3   1  0    25       JGW'S DARKNESS (574)
-SWEET CHILD 6687              3   0  0    25       GUNS-N-ROSES (314)
-SQUIRREL NUT 7793             2   0  0    24       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DURBAN POISON 7716            4   3  0    23       JGW'S ABSTRACT (573)
-PATIENCE 6716                 2   0  1    23       GUNS-N-ROSES (314)
-BALLAST 7727                  2   0  0    23       SEA DOGS (575)
 N'AZADAR 7850                 2   0  0    22       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
-T.S. POISON IVY 7737          4   4  0    20       VORTEX (571)
 MAKESHIFT ANCHOR 7724         3   1  0    20       SEA DOGS (575)
 RANDOM MANIAC 7800            2   5  1    19       HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)
-MALKAVIAN 7732                1   3  0    18       LETHAL HERITAGE (572)
 TURTLE POWER 7714             3   4  0    17       JGW'S ABSTRACT (573)
 RELLIK 7852                   2   0  0    17       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
-GORRILLA 7757                 1   1  0    17       BAM BAMX (577)
 CONNAVAR 7858                 2   0  0    16       AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)
 OVERLORD 7719                 2   2  0    14       JGW'S DARKNESS (574)
 RACHE 7856                    1   0  1    14       AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)
 EARLY MISTY 7717              1   6  0    13       JGW'S ABSTRACT (573)
 DECADO 7857                   1   1  0    13       AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)
 COMICUS 7207                  3   2  0    11       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
 DEATH'S ESCORT 7720           2   2  1    11       JGW'S DARKNESS (574)
-CROW'S NEST GUY 7726          1   0  0    11       SEA DOGS (575)
 CHINA BULL 7873               1   0  0    11       HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-TARMON GAI'DON 7789           1   0  0    11       WIND STORM (144)
 FENDER BENDER 7859            1   1  0     9       HOMICIDAL MANIACS (121)
 DANYAL 7855                   1   0  0     8       AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)
-VERMILION 7823                1   0  0     7       JGW PERISHABLE (409)
-MONKEY II 7792                0   1  0     7       BAM BAMX (577)
 BLACKENED 7721                1   3  0     6       JGW'S DARKNESS (574)
 CRYSTAL 7869                  1   0  0     6       JGW'S ABSTRACT (573)
-HORTATOR 7791                 0   2  0     6       SEA DOGS (575)
-COW 7758                      0   2  0     6       BAM BAMX (577)
-TIGER 7754                    0   2  0     6       BAM BAMX (577)
 CALIS 7849                    1   1  0     4       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
 FROST 7815                    0   4  0     4       STEEL LEGION (581)
 KAZACH 7853                   0   2  0     2       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
-PURPLE HAZE 7827              0   1  0     1       JGW PERISHABLE (409)
 BELTZER 7854                  0   1  0     1       AGENTS OF ISIRIS (587)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
S.S.'S TWIN 4085       8  7 0 DEATH'S DOOR 129      SPYMASTER 567         542 NONE    
MADDENED BELLHOP 7801  3  2 0 HOMICIDAL MANIACS 121 DEATH'S ESCORT 7720   540         
SWISS MISS 7715        1  4 0 JGW'S ABSTRACT 573    DAEL 7696             538 NOT REVE
LORD DOOM 7723         2  2 1 JGW'S DARKNESS 574    ENURAM 7851           542         
21614179611 7871       0  1 0 LAB EXPERIMENTS 261   DARK CHAMPION 569     542 NONE    
SOULCRUSHER 7799       2  4 0 MANNEQUIN'S BEST 537  MOUNTAIN TROLL 563    542 NONE    
HAIKU 7681             8  4 3 MANNEQUIN'S BEST 537  NITE TRAIN 6583       539 REVENGED
QUINTUS 7822           1  3 0 ROMAN EMPIRE 531      RACHE 7856            542         
91317179811 7872       0  1 0 SWEORDMASTERS 138     SHEWISH GIANT 566     542 NONE    
JENNIFER 7078          8  3 0 VOID 526              HREOWAN 7669          538 NOT REVE
RUG SACRIFICE 11 7865  0  1 0 VORTEX 571            SPYMASTER 567         542 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Tripwire -- You are entered into the Olympics! -- Lord Xiang

Nick -- Points for personals?  Hmmm.  How about a separate booby prize for the most
active poster, personals and spots combined? -- Lord Xiang

Mischievous Imp -- Bah!  Perhaps next time I'll win.  *grumble-mumble* -- Kandris

Old Hag -- Jeepers, your personality fits with the name! -- Lan

Black Plague -- I must've come down with a cold.  *cough* -- Brujah

Woebegone -- Just wait for the rematch!! -- TS Poison Ivy

Rookie Manager -- Look, Rookie, when ya gonna learn this here is the BIG LEAGUES? --
Catiff

Death's Escort -- Perhaps, in time, you shall become worthy enough to become the
Duelmaster of Mordant.  Until then, fear me! -- Boomer

Makeshift Anchor -- *grin*  I wonder how many commissioners we put to sleep in THAT
fight? -- Malkavian

Hortator -- Better luck in the red-light district! -- Salamander

All -- Unfortunately I've been involved with a lot of personal issues that have
dominated my time recently.  I hope the future holds blue skies and free time and I'm
able to terrorize Mordant as I should.  Real life just bites sometimes. -- JGW

Lord Xiang -- I will be participating in the Olympiad, but I am unsure of which team
it will be with.  I will announce a decision next turn. -- JGW

Seraphim -- I'd like to personally thank you for sitting out Gold this long.  You can
tell I'm doing much better without that pud around!  <eg> -- JGW

To all the teams coming for the Olympiad -- Welcome and good dueling in the upcoming
Olympiad.  Hope you decide to stay in Mordant after the contest is up, and I hope you
continue to run while your teams are losing.  ;) -- JGW

Catiff -- You knavel!  How DARE you do that to me?  You're just trying to make me
look RIDICULOUS, aren't you?  I can tell.  You're MOCKING me.  Well, I won't have it!
I'll...stand in the corner and POUT.  So there. -- Rookie Manager
P.S.  You don't look good all orange like that.  In fact, you look really yucky.

     So...he's a knavel orange? -- Ed.

Tungsten -- Sharp little thing, aren't you?  But that's okay.  I like them sharp.  I
just watch, and next thing you know, they've cut themselves.  Then I laugh.  You
know, a sort of wild cackle?  Not that "bwahaha" that evil managers use, because I'm
not an evil manager, of course.  I'm just your... Random Maniac

Redbeard -- I hope the hangover combines with the sirochi from the rapid rise in
altitude to give you a killer of a headache.  Nothing personal, I just think you NEED
a killer headache. -- Beerin Bottleman

Blackened -- Oh, silly, it's no big deal.  (nudge, nudge)  A little paint or...I
know, paper mache!  And THEN the paint.  And no one will know.  In fact, you could
fill in a much bigger dent that way, I bet.  Let's give it a try.  (nudge, nudge) --
Fender Bender

Lan -- Just so long as you appreciate me properly. -- Rookie Manager

Salamander -- EVERYTHING makes me stronger, but your pain especially. -- Random
Maniac

Boomer -- It's a dirty job, but somebody's got to do it. -- Beerin Bottleman

Catiff -- Bottles are for fighting with.  First, you pour the beer into your mug.
Then you knock the end off the bottle and defend your position. -- Beerin Bottleman

Tarmon Gai'don -- At your nearest bar or tavern. -- Beerin Bottleman, charter member
of Clean Living Through More Beer

Ed. -- Accepting the premise (which is valid) that actors are maniacs, do I want a
guildhouse full second-rate hams emoting all over the place?  I'll have to think
about this. -- Nick

     By association of ideas, I think I'll go make myself a BLT.... -- Ed.

All -- I've always wanted to compete in the Olympics!  Now it looks like my dream
comes true.  Count the Desolate Temple among the competitors. -- Toker, Desolate
Empire Alliance

Lord Xiang -- Looks like my p-ads got lost last turn.  Kinda in a hurry, but wanted
to let you know I am looking forward to the start of this. -- Toker
P.S.  A few others of the D.E. should be here soon.

You were absolutely stunning.  Good fight.  Hopefully we won't see each other again!
-- Rellik, D.T. (586)

Comicus -- Can you believe that?  I know you were happy!  To be losing and close to
finished, just to see your attacker fail at your feet!  I wish I would have known! --
Kazach

Frost -- I always thought Frost (cold) made steel brittle, huh!  What do I know, I'm
only half-Elven. -- Calas, D.T. (586)

One Armed Bandit -- Here too!  It's still good to see a familiar face in the new
lands.  This should be fun. -- Toker, mgr. Desolate Temple (586)

Nick -- I'll do my best to be at least a little verbose on every turn. -- Toker

24 March 2006
A few notes about e-mailed personals:

You may submit personal ads, columns, spotlights, etc. electronically, either via e-
mail to ads at reality dot com (which doesn't need any more spam, thank you) or on
the web at http://www.reality.com/duel2/modules.php?name=Ads.  When you submit
something, you should get back a receipt from HAL at RSI.  If you do NOT get a
receipt, your ads may have gone astray (not all e-mail makes it to its destination
any more than all snail mail does).  If you DO get a receipt, it should, in the body
of the message, tell you what arena your stuff was filed in.  Check your receipt to
make sure your submission made it to the intended destination.  Also check to see
that everything you sent made it to the same place.  Sometimes HAL, who is rather
simple-minded in some ways, will send half your stuff to another arena if the name
or number of that arena shows up at the beginning of a line.  So if the word Ti
appears at the beginning of a line halfway through your ads, all the ads after that
may end up in Ti, which is closed and doesn't need ads.  As a side note, sometimes
things move slowly, so don't wait until the last minute to send your ads and all.
If they get held up along the way, they may not show up until next turn.  Happy
writing! -- Ed.

28 March 2006
We of the Desolate Empire Alliance want to welcome two managers to our fold.  Kon of
the Empire Rising, and Osiris!  May they be blessed with the blood of their enemies,
and give no quarter in War! -- Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

S.S.'S TWIN was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
SOULCRUSHER was barely slain by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 2 minute Dark Arena battle.
RUG SACRIFICE 116 was murdered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
21614179611 was viciously butchered by DARK CHAMPION in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
91317179811 was narrowly killed by SHEWISH GIANT in a 2 minute Dark Arena fight.
CARACALLA was bested by TERCERO ENCANTO in a 2 minute Challenge brawl.
MISCHIEVOUS IMP vanquished BELESARIUS in a 3 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
KANDRIS was devastated by OLD FART in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge competition.
LAN was handily defeated by OLD HAG in a 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.
JIMMY WONG viciously subdued BLACK PLAGUE in a 2 minute gruesome Challenge fight.
CLODIUS AESOPUS vanquished ROOKIE MANAGER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
WOEBEGONE overpowered MAKESHIFT ANCHOR in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
T.S. TALON VOLKSIE was overpowered by DAEL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
CONNAVAR bested FROST in a 3 minute brutal amateur's Challenge conflict.
RELLIK luckily beat COMICUS in a crowd pleasing 3 minute novice's Challenge brawl.
ENURAM assassinated LORD DOOM in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
N'AZADAR bested DEATH'S ESCORT in a 2 minute brutal beginner's Challenge duel.
CALIS was bested by OVERLORD in a 3 minute amateur's Challenge brawl.
DECADO overpowered BLACKENED in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
MESSIAH overpowered KILL ME PLEASE in a popular 1 minute bloody one-sided Title bout.
HELLACIOUS devastated RAFFI THE GARROTE in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
NITE TRAIN defeated SPEEDWELL in a popular 3 minute gruesome one-sided duel.
BRUJAH slimly won victory over BASKET CASE in a 2 minute master vs. novice fray.
STUPENDOUS MAN was subdued by SALAMANDER in a popular 4 minute gruesome fight.
BOOMER luckily beat REDBEARD in a 2 minute gruesome fight.
EARLY MISTY was narrowly defeated by RANDOM MANIAC in a exciting 3 minute bout.
DURBAN POISON savagely defeated FENDER BENDER in a action packed 1 minute gory duel.
TURTLE POWER was handily defeated by BEERIN BOTTLEMAN in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
QUINTUS was slaughtered by RACHE in a 1 minute gory one-sided bout.
KAZACH was vanquished by CHINA BULL in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
CRYSTAL savagely defeated BELTZER in a 2 minute gory novice's match.
DANYAL beat CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute novice's bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  15         TOTAL PARRY       36 -  23 -  1      61  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   9         AIMED BLOW        18 -  13 -  0      58  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    7         LUNGING ATTACK    58 -  43 -  5      57  |
|AIMED BLOW                       6         WALL OF STEEL     24 -  21 -  1      53  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      6         SLASHING ATTACK   21 -  27 -  0      44  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     5         STRIKING ATTACK   24 -  32 -  3      43  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  4         PARRY-STRIKE      13 -  20 -  0      39  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         BASHING ATTACK    26 -  41 -  6      39  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         PARRY-LUNGE        6 -  14 -  0      30  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   2 -  0       0  |

Turn 542 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

WALL OF STEEL      5 -  2     LUNGING ATTACK     7 -  8         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     6 -  3     PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  4         2  PARRY-STRIKE   
AIMED BLOW         3 -  3     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  3         2  WALL OF STEEL  
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  2     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         1  STRIKING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  3     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  2         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                                                                1  TOTAL PARRY    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   MESSIAH 7607               16   3  3  142 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
STRIKING ATTACK  TERCERO ENCANTO 7635       12   1  1  117 LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
BASHING ATTACK   NITE TRAIN 6583            10   9  3  111 GUNS-N-ROSES (314)
TOTAL PARRY      MISCHIEVOUS IMP 7627       16   4  2   95 SWEORDMASTERS (138)
PARRY-STRIKE     SPEEDWELL 7667             10   3  0   92 LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
WALL OF STEEL    KILL ME PLEASE 1721        15   6  0   91 DEATH'S DOOR (129)
AIMED BLOW       WOEBEGONE 7795              3   2  0   41 SWEORDMASTERS (138)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is BELESARIUS 7122.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was NITE TRAIN 6583.  The ten other most popular fighters were STUPENDOUS MAN 6996, 
EARLY MISTY 7717, MISCHIEVOUS IMP 7627, COMICUS 7207, RANDOM MANIAC 7800, SOULCRUSHER 
7799, JIMMY WONG 7674, SPEEDWELL 7667, 91317179811 7872, and TERCERO ENCANTO 7635.

The least popular fighter this week was KAZACH 7853.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were QUINTUS 7822, TURTLE POWER 7714, FENDER BENDER 7859, KILL ME PLEASE 
1721, BLACKENED 7721, LORD DOOM 7723, T.S. TALON VOLKSIE 7740, MAKESHIFT ANCHOR 7724, 
ROOKIE MANAGER 7639, and 21614179611 7871.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

HELLACIOUS (1-7541) MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)