Date   : 11/27/2006    Duedate: 12/09/2006


DM-1    TURN-559

This Weeks Top Honors


(1-7793) [13-1-3,162]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

(1-7793) [13-1-3,162]          (1-7643) [1-2-0,16]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

DEATH'S DOOR (129)             DEATH'S DOOR (129)
(1-1720) [19-17-0,97]          (1-7927) [5-7-0,33]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. SHE'S CRAFTY (592)          50
2. MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)      30      SEA DOGS (575)
3. LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)       24      Unchartered Team
4. DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)       24
5. DEATH'S DOOR (129)          20      CAN I SAY THAT? (593)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2 SEA DOGS (575)            50  29  1 63.3   1/ 1 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)   11  4 1
 2/ 3 DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)     52  38  5 57.8   2/ 2 SWEORDMASTERS (138)      10  3 1
 3- 4 AGENTS OF OSIRIS (587)    38  29  4 56.7   3/ 5 LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)    10  3 1
 4/ 5 DEATH'S DOOR (129)        97  82  1 54.2   4/ 3 SHE'S CRAFTY (592)       10  5 1
 5/ 6 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)   194 170 30 53.3   5/ 6 DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)     7  8 0
 6/ 8 SWEORDMASTERS (138)      438 400 56 52.3   6/ 8 SEA DOGS (575)            6  6 0
 7/ 7 LIVE FROM MOSCOW! (576)   37  36  0 50.7   7/11 DEATH'S DOOR (129)        5  5 0
 8/ 9 LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)    351 353 40 49.9   8/ 7 LIVE FROM MOSCOW! (576)   5  7 0
 9/11 SHE'S CRAFTY (592)        36  37  4 49.3   9/10 ROMAN EMPIRE (531)        5 10 0
10/12 ROMAN EMPIRE (531)       276 310 19 47.1  10- 4 AGENTS OF OSIRIS (587)    4  1 0
11/10 STEEL LEGION (581)        37  43  2 46.3  11/13*KLK FISTS HAMMERZ (567)   4  6 0
12-13 DRAGONLANCE (585)         28  33  1 45.9  12-12 WIND STORM (144)          3  1 0
13/ 0*CAN I SAY THAT? (593)      4   5  0 44.4  13-14 JGW PERISHABLE (409)      2  3 1
14-14 WIND STORM (144)         443 575 30 43.5  14/ 0*RUSTED ARMOR (603)        2  3 0
15/ 0*THE ASGARDIANS (602)       2   3  0 40.0  15/ 0*THE ASGARDIANS (602)      2  3 0
16/ 0*RUSTED ARMOR (603)         2   3  0 40.0  16- 9 DRAGONLANCE (585)         1  6 0
17/15*KLK FISTS HAMMERZ (567)    5  10  0 33.3  17/15 STEEL LEGION (581)        0  5 0
18-16 JGW PERISHABLE (409)      24  57  4 29.6  18/ 0*CAN I SAY THAT? (593)     0  1 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

                                  MORDANT MELODRAMA
                                       Act One
                               by Hammer the WordSmith

"A calm and undisturbed mind and heart are the life and health of the body, but envy,
jealousy, and wrath are like rottenness of the bones." -- Proverbs 14:30 Amplified

     Hammer surveyed the information and was satisfied to find ten other active
stables besides his newly activated KLK FISTS HAMMERZ. The activation had been much
swifter than the veteran manager had expected and hopefully the sack of gold coins
had reached the Gladiatorial Commission in plenty of time to continue the activation.
     For far too long had several HAMMERZ stables languished in inactivity, but good
fortune had smiled upon the veteran manager and the yearning to once again face the
challenge of graduating a mediocre at best gathering of gladiators had stirred within
the soul of Hammer to begin the activation with his collection of misfits in Mordant
     Hammer was indeed willing to send his KLK FISTS HAMMERZ onto the sands of
Mordant Arena for the next several months in an effort to see which gladiators were
able to overcome the rigors of facing Tourney Primed and Timed Warriors and a wealth
of other gladiators much far better suited for combat than the current roster in his
     BELCH FIST HAMMER not only provided a humorous outlook, but an equally
challenging opportunity to produce a winner and/or survivor from the dregs of
mediocrity that had so saturated the paper warrior.
     TROLL FIST HAMMER was another hard case that was better suited for fighting by
torchlight, but Hammer had decided the challenge of sending this one to do battle on
the sands of Mordant Arena far outweighed the simplicity of the Dark Arena.
     CRUDE FIST HAMMER was a case for the Jaded to analyze, but this one as well
needed the right opportunity cycle in and cycle out to survive the competition.
     BLOOD FIST HAMMER might well prove to be the bright spot on the roster, but Time
and Tourney would pass judgment either harshly or graciously on the road to
     BLACK FIST HAMMER was another of the historical favorites that the veteran
manager was prone to sign to fight under the HAMMERZ banner. Yet another reason for
Hammer to activate this stable and allow this gladiator to slice his way to
     Each warrior had been originally assembled to compete in the Mordant Olympics,
but due to circumstances beyond the control of Hammer this stable and many others had
been deactivated. Perhaps it had been for the best, but now was the time to grant
these gladiators the opportunity to fight their way to graduation and glory...or die

Minister of War

                                      SPY REPORT

     It's me, The Unknown Spymaster here with my bag to give you the news on last 
week's fights.  A stormcloud is brewing over the DRAGONLANCE guildhouse.  Rumor says 
any more weeks like this ones 0-0-0 may send the team to the Dark Arena.  Coming up 
with a solid 4-1-0 outing, DEATH'S DOOR has advanced 4 places in the rankings.  LAB 
EXPERIMENTS is no joke as it posted a 4-1-0 week advancing from 5th place to 3rd 
place.  Hey everybody, watch out for SEIUS GLABRIO, who flew up 28 points in the 
rankings after mashing BELY MEDVED like a melon.  Keep your eye on this guy.  And 
falling like a basher in the top ten was BELY MEDVED, who dropped 23 points after a 
disappointing (to say the least) bout with SEIUS GLABRIO.  Well, everybody's pal 
SQUIRREL NUT moved its record to 13-1-3 by defeating COBALT in the Duelmaster's Title 
Bout and gaining 14 recognition points.  Can you believe they are paying me 10 gold 
to deliver this stuff?   
     Here is other news that is of note.  Here's a song for you:  Who's afraid of the 
MORDANT's afraid of the big bad LAB EXPERIMENTS.  Tra la la la la!  Okay, so I may 
not be funny, but catch SHE'S CRAFTY's act in the arena.  Those acrobats seem to be 
fairly deft at running from LAB EXPERIMENTS.  And who is this MAKESHIFT ANCHOR you 
ask, with 64 points and a 13-7-0 record.  Ooh, the tales I could tell!   
     Death is kind of like a new puppy:  he's always around wanting to play.  (Ha 
Zontani, how's that for a wise saying?).  AEGLOS says to his dog--'Who should I fight 
this week?'.  Dog says 'MOUNTAIN TROLL'.  So the guy dies.  Moral?  Put lying dogs to 
sleep.  Knowing when to use the right tactics at the proper time is a very important 
step on the road to Duelmaster.   
     Well, there's the manager of the MORDANT giving me the 'cut' sign (or is that 
'They're going to strangle you in the alley?).  Okay, so I may not be the world's 
best comedian, but then you guys aren't the world's best warriors.  Its been real, 
and its been fun, but it hasn't been real fun...-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SQUIRREL NUT 7793            13   1  3   162       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PRODIGAL SON 7937            11   2  0   109       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
 WOEBEGONE 7795               14   8  1   106       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
 BLACK PLAGUE 1720            19  17  0    97       DEATH'S DOOR (129)
 COBALT 7784                  11   6  0    92       STEEL LEGION (581)
 BASHFUL 7899                 11   4  0    92       SHE'S CRAFTY (592)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CHEESE WHIZ 7821             11   4  3    86       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
 GLUTIUS MAXIMUS 7906         11   5  1    86       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
 SOULTANCHOR 7980              7   2  2    85       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
 ENURAM 7851                  12   6  3    74       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
 FROZEN ROPE 7841              9   8  0    73       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
 TUNGSTEN 7788                10   9  2    69       STEEL LEGION (581)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KAZACH 7853                  10   8  0    66       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
 MAKESHIFT ANCHOR 7724        13   7  0    64       SEA DOGS (575)
 SEIUS GLABRIO 7978            5   2  1    63       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
 COMICUS 7207                 10  12  0    62       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
-DANYAL 7855                   8   5  1    62       AGENTS OF OSIRIS (587)
 N'AZADAR 7850                11   7  2    61       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
 SWEET STUFF 7966              8   2  1    57       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
 FULL METAL MINX 7900          8   7  0    57       SHE'S CRAFTY (592)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-LAN 6724                     12  18  0    54       WIND STORM (144)
 BALLAST 7727                  8  10  0    54       SEA DOGS (575)
 ZIMA 7750                    10   6  0    53       LIVE FROM MOSCOW! (576)
 PROPAGANDA 7747               7   9  0    51       LIVE FROM MOSCOW! (576)
 CALIS 7849                    9   9  0    50       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
-FLINT FIREFORGE 7848          8   5  0    48       DRAGONLANCE (585)
 HORTATOR 7791                 7   4  1    47       SEA DOGS (575)
 GOLD 7787                     7   6  0    47       STEEL LEGION (581)
 HATCH BATTENER 8014           3   0  0    47       SEA DOGS (575)
-SALAMANDER 7769              10  13  1    46       WIND STORM (144)
 RELLIK 7852                  10   8  0    44       DESOLATE TEMPLE (586)
-FEYEVER 7993                  3   2  1    42       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
-CONNAVAR 7858                 8   6  0    41       AGENTS OF OSIRIS (587)
 FRENCH TICKLER 7930           7   6  1    41       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BELY MEDVED 7751             10   6  0    40       LIVE FROM MOSCOW! (576)
-LOST SOUL 7868                6   6  2    36       JGW PERISHABLE (409)
-BELTZER 7854                  7   6  0    35       AGENTS OF OSIRIS (587)
 PRAESENTIUS 7996              4   2  0    35       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
-TENAKA KHAN 7940              5   4  1    34       AGENTS OF OSIRIS (587)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LARRY KING 7893               9   6  0    33       DEATH'S DOOR (129)
 KEITH RICHARDS 7927           5   7  0    33       DEATH'S DOOR (129)
 WINDREAVER 8000               5   2  1    32       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
-RAISTLIN 7845                 7   6  0    29       DRAGONLANCE (585)
 SIMPLICITY 7995               5   3  1    28       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
 CHOBAM 7913                   4   5  0    27       STEEL LEGION (581)
 LUNG CANCER 7977              4   3  0    26       DEATH'S DOOR (129)
 TYPHOID MARY 7941             4   7  0    25       DEATH'S DOOR (129)
 CHROME 7908                   3   6  0    25       STEEL LEGION (581)
 REAPING BEAUTY 8032           2   0  0    25       SHE'S CRAFTY (592)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 12 GAUGE PIXIE 7970           2   5  1    22       SHE'S CRAFTY (592)
-LOYOLA 7956                   3   5  0    19       JGW PERISHABLE (409)
-FEWMASTER TOEDE 7954          4   4  0    16       DRAGONLANCE (585)
 CRUDE FIST HAMMER 7643        1   2  0    16       KLK FISTS HAMMERZ (567)
-FLYING BUTT...RESSES 7916     1   1  0    16       CAN I SAY THAT? (593)
 STEEPLEJACK 8031              2   0  0    15       SWEORDMASTERS (138)
 SLAP PAPPY 8021               2   1  1    13       MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
 BLACK FIST HAMMER 7645        2   1  0    13       KLK FISTS HAMMERZ (567)
 BLOOD FIST HAMMER 7644        2   1  0    13       KLK FISTS HAMMERZ (567)
-ARAKIAN 8022                  1   1  0    13       AGENTS OF OSIRIS (587)
-HARRY KNUCKLES 8024           1   0  0    13       JGW PERISHABLE (409)
-SHUCKY DARN 7920              1   0  0    11       CAN I SAY THAT? (593)
 TROLL FIST HAMMER 7642        0   3  0    11       KLK FISTS HAMMERZ (567)
-BUTT...ERMILK 7918            1   0  0    10       CAN I SAY THAT? (593)
 AANSLOW NJORD 8030            1   0  0    10       THE ASGARDIANS (602)
 LARCIA 7999                   2   3  0     9       ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
 BELCH FIST HAMMER 7641        0   3  0     9       KLK FISTS HAMMERZ (567)
 THUNDERSTRUCK 8039            1   0  0     8       RUSTED ARMOR (603)
 ASS...ININE 7919              1   2  0     5       CAN I SAY THAT? (593)
 MISS TEAK 8015                1   2  0     5       SEA DOGS (575)
 THOROR IRONHAND 8026          1   0  0     5       THE ASGARDIANS (602)
 CROWBARBIE 8041               1   0  0     5       SHE'S CRAFTY (592)
 GRUMPET 8038                  1   0  0     5       RUSTED ARMOR (603)
-TAS 8020                      1   1  0     4       DRAGONLANCE (585)
-STRICKEN 8013                 0   3  0     3       JGW PERISHABLE (409)
 COPPERHEAD 8040               0   1  0     1       RUSTED ARMOR (603)
 HOT TODDY 8043                0   1  0     1       LAB EXPERIMENTS (261)
 TYBAL NJEK 8029               0   1  0     1       THE ASGARDIANS (602)
 IRONCLAD 8037                 0   1  0     1       RUSTED ARMOR (603)
 BLACKHEART 8036               0   1  0     1       RUSTED ARMOR (603)
 LYSE RANN 8028                0   1  0     1       THE ASGARDIANS (602)
 GEOLF NJORD 8027              0   1  0     1       THE ASGARDIANS (602)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
RANIS 7846             3  6 0 DRAGONLANCE 585       SWEET STUFF 7966      555 NOT REVE
LUARANA 7964           3  4 0 DRAGONLANCE 585       LOST SOUL 7868        557         
VERMILION 7823         5 10 1 JGW PERISHABLE 409    SOULTANCHOR 7980      556         
SLINGBLADE 7957        2  4 1 JGW PERISHABLE 409    SOULTANCHOR 7980      555 NOT REVE
BLACK KETTLE 8025      0  1 0 JGW PERISHABLE 409    SLAP PAPPY 8021       557         
KOMPROMAT 7997         2  6 0 LIVE FROM MOSCOW! 576 WINDREAVER 8000       559         
AEGLOS 7994            5  3 0 SWEORDMASTERS 138     MOUNTAIN TROLL 563    559 NONE    
KANDRIS 6612          14 22 1 WIND STORM 144        WOEBEGONE 7795        555 NOT REVE

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
TARMON GAI'DON 7789    3  8 0 WIND STORM 144        N'AZADAR 7850         555 NOT REVE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Hope everyone decides to stay as Mordant is GREAT! -- Toker (smiling like Tony the

Osiris -- Diplo enroute as well as snail!  We need to be ready for TW 5 over in North
Fork.  It looks like a lot of managers are already showing up!  It will be a blast.
-- D.K. Toker

JGW -- I saw you in 47.  Are you going to compete?  I hope so, as said above it is
fun.  I just brought in a new team "Smoked Out!!!" over there so look me up! -- D.K.

Mordant Maniacs -- My apologies for having been absent for so long!  My current plan
is to allow this stable the opportunity to fight their way to graduation and glory!
Should any die along the way their replacement will be evaluated for possible
activation! -- Hammer/Minister of War

Mordant Maroons -- I look forward to [BELCH] meeting and [BELCH] defeating each and
every [BELCH] gladiator that has the [BELCH] misfortune of matching up with my
[BELCH] fight time on the [BELCH] sands! -- BELCH FIST HAMMER

2 November 2006
I received a Gift Certificate from someone.  I'm assuming it's for entry into the
Turf War 5.  Whoever sent this to me...please email me at rbaphomets@yahoo.com.

10 November 2006
     The Quest of the Best has come to an end.  Dark Knight Toker, host of the Quest,
wants to proclaim the Ultimate Victor and give a listing of prize winners.
     Lady Fern and her Flower Girls of the Consortium are the Ultimate Victors of the
Quest.  Well fought and there's nothing like coming from behind to leave us all in
the dust.  Can't wait to see you defend your title! (wink)
     Here is a complete list of managers who placed in prize positions:

1)  Lady Fern, mgr. Flower Girls
2)  Le Pentarque, mgr. Blood & Guts!
3)  Crip, mgr. Otto's Parts
4)  D.K. Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Odin's Chosen
5)  Ghab, mgr. Assassin Nation
6)  Fanthayne, mgr. Dark Raiders
7)  D.K. Toker, mgr. Silver Knights
8)  D.K. Wasby, mgr. Bronze Knights
9)  The Expatriate, mgr. Bleak Legion
10) Still the Distilled, mgr. Springborne Fair

     Thanks to all that had the gall to show up, but I really want to thank the
managers that had the mettle to survive and not run when they started getting their
butt handed to them.
                                                           Respect to All.
                                                           Quest #1 host,
                                                           Dark Knight Toker

14 November 2006
                                      A Tale of
                        Fusion Confusion Delusion Revolution
                                     as told by
                                Hammer the WordSmith

     SomeWhere Beyond ElseWhere and ElseWhen a hooded figure brooded upon the
lingering wisps of memory from days gone by.
     From the howling sands to the sanding howls the streams of thought bubbled and
flowed, winding endlessly entwined within the darkest recesses and lightest resources
of the learned and unlearned disciplines of managerial mayhem and manipulation.
     Nameless faces and faceless names floated in the swirling mists of madness
embalmed within the memories of one who knew he did not know how far reaching the
influences [both positive and negative] had rooted and flowered in the march of time
and energy expended in the historical markings of gladiatorial essence and excellence
     The tamed and the untamed coupled with the named and the unnamed resources that
spilt their sweat and blood on the sands of arenas both known and unknown had
metamorphosed into the dreamings and the schemings of the fadings of jadings and
paradings [in both public and private] amongst the elite and the indiscreet
posturings and babblings of managers becoming legends in their own minds and times.
     Hammer pondered upon beginnings and the seemingly endless myriad of endings
possibly possible among the interspersed and intertwined impossible possibilities
presently past and future.
     Echoing and reechoing in the vast depths and countless compartments along the
corridors of his mind, Hammer played and replayed the glories shared and dared in the
sixty-plus stabled arena on fabled Noblish Island DM 93.
     The training had been all too brief, but the competition generated by the multi
faceted personages inhabiting DM 93 and the sheer multitude of numbers had forever
instilled themselves in the heart and soul of the veteran manager [Hammer]; insomuch
that the migration to Niatoli Island DM 33 triggered the desire to emulate the glory
and the grandeur of the spectacle of stables vying for recognition from among the
virtually numberless no-name newbies making names for themselves as they numbered
their stables and accomplishments for all to see and behold, to the song and the
sound of the sight of clashing cold cruel steel simmering the flesh of gallant
gladiators consumed by the gory and the glory of crossing blades with the superior
and the inferior within the interior of Greywand's Global Gladiatorial Galaxy.
     Far far ago and long long away had many abandoned hope for a return to the
reminiscences revered by so many managers; predating even the generations of
gladiators graduating from Noblish Island and the years of yore and gore and
gallantry before.
     Rumblings and mumblings of a renovation rejuvenating the reflexes of managers
numbed by the numberless trysts of tourney tarnished stables began revolutionizing
the very fabric of time and space and time-honored tradition throughout the ranks of
visionary newbies and volatile veterans alike and dislike.
     History was being shaken to the core of the gore as glory and grandeur responded
to the revelry reverie revelations and reveille revolutionizing the creation of a new
arena in the making; populated by No-Tourney Warriors and Full Stable Participants
pledging to forge a new vision version of "The Fiercest and Best" for crossing blades
and crosser banter in the personal ads and team spotlight tomes.
     Now was the time for Hammer to emerge and once again merge his talent among the
gifted and grifted; answering the call to assemble the drifted [and to directly
divulge and converge with the dozens] for the destiny of destructive denizens
determined to build a new legacy upon the all-but-forgotten ashes of the old and
olden legends of times lost.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer sifted the sands in the dead of night in the desert reaches [located
SomeWhere BeYond ElseWhere and ElseWhen] to discover 5 gladiators not tourney worthy,
yet interesting enough to begin their careers in a No-Tourney Arena!
     "They need not be dispatched to the Dark Arena," the veteran manager mused as he
sorted through paperwork long discarded and vaguely forgotten, "because there is
nothing like a good Blood Feud to provide inspiration for writing personal ads in the
arena newsletter! Besides, there are times when the replacement for a warrior wounded
mortally on the arena sands fares much better than the one exchanged from Torch
     Fights by Torch Light were certainly deemed unnecessary as Hammer had already
deduced that a number of determined stables would undoubtedly congregate with High
Octane Warriors under the guidance of Higher Octane Managers to populate and
depopulate the new No-Tourney Arena currently under construction in DM 81.
     Fortunately his feeble foray into the desert would yield somewhat suitable
candidates for the newfound purposes Hammer had in mind.
     From among the candidates to be found Hammer would be rewarded in time by
     Deep into the night Hammer searched and searched until five not-so-promising
stables were uncovered in the waning hours before dawn.
     Ripper discards were scattered far and wide, but this was not the time or the
hour to let sentimental views cloud the issue at hand.  Future events would lend
themselves to a suitable Ripper replacement, especially with the prospects Hammer was
now sorting for his selection decision to dispatch to the Gladiatorial Commission for
     Most managers have the luxury of selecting the best group [or discarding the
worst group!] Hammer had the novelty of rounding up the castaways from the New
Stables paperwork accumulated long ago from Maximillian's Morya Madness contest in DM
28 that were deemed below inferior as contest prizes [and thus banished from sight!]
     Hammer scrutinized and agonized over which group of gladiators were worth the
sacks of gold coins he was prepared to release to the Gladiatorial Commission for
fees to MAINTENANCE his new stable in the No-Tourney Arena.
     After what seemed like long hours passing by, Hammer discarded one and then
another group of hopefuls.  After lengthy debate a third was cast aside.  Deciding
between the final two groups found Hammer going back to interview the rejected
candidates time and time again [until a final decision was made that Hammer could
live with and his new stable could die with!] before the final quirks were hammered
out and pen put to paper to process the prospective puny stable with the Gladiatorial
     The only solace gained from the painful process was the knowledge that other
managers would be less tempted to run stables in DM 81 populated by their tourney-
worthy warriors [under the penalty of death imposed and enforced upon tourney
experienced gladiators by the Committee being formed to police and regulate such
matters!] as sworn to and signed in good faith by each registering manager.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer had worked long and hard to find suitable candidates for his stable and
now it was time to begin their training.  The paperwork had been dispatched for
registration with the Gladiatorial Commission and now was the hour in which
preparation was paramount!
     Dispatch riders had arrived with the news that Considerable Bounty was being
offered as incentive rewards to those managers sending new stables to the No-Tourney
     Hammer realized this would Up the Ante [causing greater pause in the managerial
community for selecting suitable stables!] as the creative competition was certain to
escalate and produce Serious Sword Slinging Stables Staining the Arena Sands Red!
     Obviously a serious upgrade in the quality of competition migrating to the No-
Tourney Arena in DM 81 would definitely work in favor of Hammer; enormously
increasing the death toll percentage potential amongst the ranks of his new start-up
stable in DM 81 [Sands Running Red and Blood Feuds Running Rampant as Undoubtedly
     Hammer observed the futility of his new warriors training [as well as they could
for what they were made from!] while recent memories came to the forefront of his
     When the paperwork was nearly completed and names were selected for each
Gladiator, Hammer decided to name the stable according to what he had discovered in
the darkness while searching during the dismal hours of the desert night.
     These warriors would probably be more well suited to fight by Torch Light had
they fallen into the possession of most other managers!
     Paper Warriors better suited to confronting Dark Arena Monsters [rather than
being fed to the Gladiatorial Lions certain to be populating the regular No-Tourney
     Specimens blatantly better suited for feeding upon agitated armadillo ants than
for striving to attain recognition and fame in the No-Tourney Arena [or any arena!]
     Thus was AARDVARK HAMMERZ birthed and born for Greatness or Disgrace!
         [TIME JUMP]
     Dispatch riders on winged steeds brought the news Hammer had been awaiting!
     Not since the days of training on Noblish Island in DM 93 had Hammer encountered
such collective enthusiasm for crossing blades in a selected arena such as DM 81
[recalling the time Hammer generated a gathering of newbies to transfer to Niatoli
Island in DM 33 to match wits and cross blades with the assembling veterans upon
     The Consortium had represented the veterans well in DM 33 with the SWEETNESS
stable managed by Sweety Pie.  Now the good news had arrived that The Consortium was
seen registering a stable named LIFE IMPACTS in the No-Tourney Arena!
     Former alliance mates Darque and Kat had reportedly registered DARQUE AGES and
KATHOUSE with the Gladiatorial Commission.
     Morya Madness combatant LePentarque from DM 28 had registered LA PENTARCHIE and
longtime fixture Drake in North Fork DM 47 [recently returned from a lengthy hiatus]
had been lured by the competition to register DRAKE'S HARDWARE.
     Deke [at the helm of DOC LEGRAND'S LAB] was instrumental in promoting the No-
Tourney Arena by repeatedly negotiating terms with the Gladiatorial Commission.
Others had laid the groundwork before him, but Deke raised the banner and carried it
the final distance [Supported by Countless Managers too numerous to mention!] Salute
Yourselves for Your Efforts are Most Graciously Applauded throughout Alastari!
     Apex had signed in with CAROLINA BLUE as had Ghab with ASSASSIN NATION.
     Another familiar name was found on the rolls as DeGotti registered CULT OF
BACCHUS followed by DOOM KNIGHTS managed by Blackstorm.
     Also on the rolls to be noted were AS SEEN ON TV II managed by Indimar and
RAGNAROK'S WOLVES by none other than ragnorokwolf.
     Nomad had signed on with PHANTOM REGIMENT and Silas followed suit with
     Another notable signature was that of MasterBeru with CHILDHOOD HEROES and a
penchant for scribing Team Spotlights [A Plus in Any Arena!]
     Detective Kellumbo had followed the clues and was observed enroute to
registering a yet unannounced stable [such are the ways of sleuthhounds and such!]
     Rumor had it that the manager known as Roadkill was on his way to register a
stable after his namesake and Slugbait was close behind [obliviously lost in
     Finally [in no particular disorder!] managers Grimm, Woody, Terminator, Den and
Bill were also seen elbowing their way through the gathering registration crowd to
officially announce their participation in the No-Tourney Arena.
     COUNTLESS OTHER MANAGERS were known to be pondering the consequences of sending
stables to a No-Tourney Arena and had yet to make the commitment public knowledge as
to their intentions.
     Howbeit the Gladiatorial Commission was reportedly swamped with requests for New
Stable Registration Forms [whether for the Tempe Facer or No-Tourney Arena was
anybody's guess at the present time!]
     Judging from the furtive figures darting and ducking in the shadows and
alleyways throughout Alastari [as well as those huddled in taverns or communicating
with one another by various means available!] the success of such a No-Tourney Arena
was Ballooning far Beyond the Expectations of the Promoters and Petitioners Bar None!
had the Best Potential for attracting and assembling a congregation of competitors
rivaling the numbers of Noblish Island from days gone by!
       JANUARY 2007 MARKS THE BEGINNING of a Journey where both Newbies and Veterans
join together in a Historic Assemblage Celebrating the Crossing of Blades between
some of the Best Managed Stables in all of Alastari [Known and Unknown!]
                 "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper"
                                          Minister of War

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

AEGLOS was butchered by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
PRODIGAL SON devastated GLUTIUS MAXIMUS in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
SOULTANCHOR overpowered COMICUS in a 1 minute bloody mismatched Challenge duel.
ENURAM overpowered ZIMA in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
KAZACH viciously subdued MAKESHIFT ANCHOR in a 3 minute expert's Challenge brawl.
12 GAUGE PIXIE was narrowly defeated by PRAESENTIUS in a 2 minute Challenge brawl.
STEEPLEJACK defeated TROLL FIST HAMMER in a 1 minute Challenge melee.
REAPING BEAUTY vanquished BLOOD FIST HAMMER in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
SQUIRREL NUT vanquished COBALT in a 1 minute gruesome uneven Title fight.
WOEBEGONE overpowered CAPTAIN ELOY in a action packed 1 minute gory one-sided fight.
TUNGSTEN was overpowered by BLACK PLAGUE in a 1 minute bloody one-sided match.
CHEESE WHIZ viciously subdued N'AZADAR in a exciting 1 minute brutal contest.
FROZEN ROPE was devastated by BASHFUL in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
BELY MEDVED was handily defeated by SEIUS GLABRIO in a popular 1 minute uneven fight.
HORTATOR was unbelievably bested by FULL METAL MINX in a action packed 2 minute duel.
BALLAST beat KEITH RICHARDS in a crowd pleasing 5 minute brawl.
SWEET STUFF unbelievably bested CALIS in a exciting 2 minute fight.
GOLD was demolished by HATCH BATTENER in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
RELLIK was overpowered by PROPAGANDA in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
SIMPLICITY bested CHROME in a popular 5 minute contest.
LARRY KING outlasted BELCH FIST HAMMER in a monotonous 15 minute duel.
WINDREAVER executed KOMPROMAT in a 1 minute uneven fray.
FRENCH TICKLER handily defeated CHOBAM in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
TYPHOID MARY subdued MISS TEAK in a 2 minute veteran vs. beginner fight.
LUNG CANCER beat SLAP PAPPY in a 1 minute fight.
CRUDE FIST HAMMER slimly won victory over ASS...ININE in a 2 minute gory fight.
BLACK FIST HAMMER narrowly defeated HOT TODDY in a 3 minute gruesome novice's melee.
LARCIA overcame IRONCLAD in a 1 minute beginner's bout.
LYSE RANN was beaten by THUNDERSTRUCK in a exciting 2 minute beginner's competition.
TYBAL NJEK was defeated by GRUMPET in a 3 minute beginner's fight.
AANSLOW NJORD handily defeated BLACKHEART in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
GEOLF NJORD was savagely defeated by CROWBARBIE in a tiresome 7 minute novice's fight.
THOROR IRONHAND luckily beat COPPERHEAD in a 2 minute bloody novice's fray.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  16         AIMED BLOW        46 -  31 -  2      60  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  10         STRIKING ATTACK   50 -  34 -  7      60  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      9         TOTAL PARRY       44 -  38 -  3      54  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  8         LUNGING ATTACK    93 -  82 - 10      53  |
|AIMED BLOW                       8         WALL OF STEEL     35 -  31 -  4      53  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         PARRY-LUNGE        9 -   9 -  0      50  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  4         BASHING ATTACK    44 -  49 -  5      47  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-STRIKE      11 -  15 -  1      42  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         SLASHING ATTACK   18 -  44 -  1      29  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -   5 -  0      29  |

Turn 559 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     7 -  9         3  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     WALL OF STEEL      2 -  3         2  AIMED BLOW     
TOTAL PARRY        6 -  3     AIMED BLOW         3 -  5         2  BASHING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    5 -  3     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  3         1  PARRY-STRIKE   
BASHING ATTACK     5 -  5     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                                                                1  WALL OF STEEL  
                                                                1  LUNGING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  SQUIRREL NUT 7793          13   1  3  162 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
AIMED BLOW       PRODIGAL SON 7937          11   2  0  109 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
PARRY-STRIKE     BLACK PLAGUE 1720          19  17  0   97 DEATH'S DOOR (129)
SLASHING ATTACK  COBALT 7784                11   6  0   92 STEEL LEGION (581)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
BASHING ATTACK   BASHFUL 7899               11   4  0   92 SHE'S CRAFTY (592)
WALL OF STEEL    GLUTIUS MAXIMUS 7906       11   5  1   86 ROMAN EMPIRE (531)
LUNGING ATTACK   FROZEN ROPE 7841            9   8  0   73 MANNEQUIN'S BEST (537)
TOTAL PARRY      MAKESHIFT ANCHOR 7724      13   7  0   64 SEA DOGS (575)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is BLACK PLAGUE 1720.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was KEITH RICHARDS 7927.  The ten other most popular fighters were CHROME 7908, 

The least popular fighter this week was BELCH FIST HAMMER 7641.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were LARRY KING 7893, GEOLF NJORD 8027, CROWBARBIE 8041, BLACKHEART 
8036, GRUMPET 8038, LYSE RANN 8028, CHOBAM 7913, KOMPROMAT 7997, RELLIK 7852, and 
GOLD 7787.