Date   : 02/12/2004    Duedate: 02/25/2004


DM-3    TURN-494

This Weeks Top Honors


(3-6092) [16-14-0,102]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

DREUBRA                        SAPPHIRE STAR
THE BALROGS (121)              SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)
(3-6092) [16-14-0,102]         (3-6352) [3-0-0,39]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

DREUBRA                        DEWEY
THE BALROGS (121)              GAMES LIBRARY (340)
(3-6092) [16-14-0,102]         (3-6363) [2-2-0,19]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. AESIR (164)                 60
2. THE BALROGS (121)           43      THE BALROGS II (560)
3. SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)       25      Unchartered Team
4. THE CONFUSED (584)          20
5. SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)       19      SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 3*SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)      6   3  0 66.7   1/ 2 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)     9  6 2
 2/ 0 THE BALROGS II (560)      33  17  0 66.0   2/ 3 AESIR (164)               9  6 0
 3/ 2 THE NUKES (580)           31  22  2 58.5   3/ 1 THE NUKES (580)           8  6 0
 4/ 4 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)    132 103  9 56.2   4/ 5*THE CONFUSED (584)        7  7 2
 5/ 0 THE BALROGS (121)        530 445 22 54.4   5/ 6*SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)     6  3 0
 6/ 5*THE CONFUSED (584)         7   7  2 50.0   6/ 4 GAMES LIBRARY (340)       6  9 0
 7/ 6 AESIR (164)              540 545 39 49.8   7/ 0 THE BALROGS (121)         3  2 0
 8/ 7 GAMES LIBRARY (340)      326 507  8 39.1   8/ 7 AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)  3 10 0
 9/ 8 AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)  72 114  3 38.7   9/ 0 THE BALROGS II (560)      2  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Dark Federation #4 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +


     Tirisha Dulake looked around the suite--the one hotel's best suite--and sighed.
It wasn't what she was used to, but until she and her husband could move into the
governor's mansion, it would have to do.  She glanced at her husband and her lush
mouth flattened in annoyance.  He had been the governor of Rodeki before--before
Gryzash--so why couldn't he accept that she would make him governor again?  She would
make him PRINCE of Rodeki, if he would just stop worrying!
     She sighed faintly and moved toward him, to explain--again--why this was a good
thing to do.

     In the anteroom of the suite, Sue E Syde, Lady Protector from Xochithlan and
escort of Princess Tirisha, sighed also.  Not that she knew what was going on in the
room behind her.  Or cared.  Her job was to guard King Feyen's cousin.  Or maybe she
was his sister.  Arenamaster Xoron hadn't been clear about that.  Or maybe Tirisha
was both his sister and his cousin.  Elves were like that; everyone said so.  Not
that it mattered.
     What mattered was the job.  And the people she had to work with.  Her teammate,
Lord Protector Rob A Ree, for instance.  Not the person she would have chosen to work
with.  Too full of himself, Rob was.  But at that, he was better than the Rodekian
Lord Protector Adabemis & Balmador.  The man was a fruitcake, and no two ways about

     "The whole shape of the Federation is changing, Devon," Tirisha said urgently.
"It's as though Gryzash was the keystone of an arch, and now that he's gone, the
lines of power are shifting.  Everything is changing.  Rodeki could be the center of
the shift, the point around which the new structure forms--and you could be--"
     Dulake shook his head.  "Rodeki?  Not a chance, it's a backwater.  Important as
a mining center, but it would never be the heart of the Federation, or even of the
Mordanti Alliance.  Besides, Queen Talissen wouldn't like it.  She'd be angry, really
angry.  And she's got a man here already, Gryzash's deputy, uh, Milvares, I think his
name is...."
     Tirisha could have shrieked and stamped her rage at her husband's over-caution,
but she held it in.  He never responded properly to such displays.  "A flunky."  The
elven woman dismissed Milvares with a contemptuous gesture.  "He will be dealt with."

     Sue E Syde looked up as the captain of Princess Tirisha's personal guards
emerged from deeper in the suite.  Captain Shirivien was an elf, of course, just like
the princess herself.  Well, Sue could live with that, as long as the man was
competent.  As he seemed to be.  But right now, he also looked annoyed.
     "Get the rest of the gladiators," Captain Shirivien snapped.  "We have a
     Sue raised an eyebrow in question.  Until she knew what had the man wound up,
she wouldn't know how to deal with it, and with him.
     Shirivien grimaced sourly.  "We're going to arrest the governor of Rodeki."
     The gladiatrix's other eyebrow joined the first.  "On what grounds and with what
authority?" she asked.  She had nothing against arresting a governor, generally
speaking, but if it was going to cause trouble, she wanted to know which direction to
watch to see that trouble coming.
     The captain's frown deepened.  "On the grounds that Princess Tirisha wants him
arrested, and by her authority."
     Definitely trouble coming.  "Does this governor have any guards of his own?" Sue
     "Of course he does."  Shirivien released his scowl suddenly and sighed.  "This
is going to make a lot of trouble."


     Faceless, a gladiator of The Black Company of Mordant, settled onto the small
ledge and leaned back against sun-warmed stone.  There was room here for her to sit
comfortably, and for a small satchel beside her (today it contained a bottle of beer
and a few slabs of bread and cheese), and a small but powerful crossbow on her other
side.  That was enough.  Her stint on watch here was only a few hours, after all.
And nothing was likely to happen.  Oh, sure, there were RUMORS, but you couldn't
count on a rumor to produce a good fight.  Her position had been formed by the
ornamental stonework on an old mansion overlooking the Feyranse River where it flowed
through Mordant.  Just across the river was the Queen's palace.  That was what she
was watching--the palace.  There were rumors of an intention to assassinate the
Queen, and Her Majesty's Herald, Allech Rabo, had taken the rumors seriously and
enrolled gladiators along with his regular men to cover the possible approaches.
     The Queen's official guards hadn't been pleased!  Faceless grinned, remembering.
Especially, it hadn't pleased that part of the Royal Guard which was composed of the
younger sons of Mordanti noble families.  Very insulted, they'd been.  Young snots.
It served them right, they'd had things too easy all their lives.  THEY didn't have
to enter the arena to make a place for themselves in the world.
     There'd been one especially, Ferris Kor, younger son of the Duke of Sharm.  Not
bad looking, if he'd ever had a pleasant expression on his face.  Which he probably
never did.  One of the other gladiators on guard, the Homicidal Maniac Babyface, had
told her that Ferris's older brother had wanted to marry Queen Talissen himself.  And
Ferris acted like that had actually happened, like he was royal himself.  What a
     But while her thoughts had wandered, Faceless's attention had stayed strictly on
the job, and she now heard someone making a quiet approach to her position over the
mansion's roof.  Faceless levered the crossbow to full cock and braced one foot under
herself in case she had to move quickly.
     "A friend coming."  The voice was low but familiar.  Marian of Ravenskeep, who
had graduated from Mordant arena and gone on to Lirith Kai.
     Faceless glanced quickly toward the voice.  It was Marian, all right.  She
lowered the crossbow as the woman settled into the angle beside a dormer window, the
nearest place to Faceless's little ledge that a person could sit.
     "Something may be happening," Marian said quietly.  "Word's come along that
there's someone on the river who isn't acting normally."
     Faceless quickly scanned all the river she could see.  There was a lot of
activity; there was always a lot of activity.  Barges hauling grain or coal or who-
knew-what.  Yachts belonging to noblemen.  Smaller boats, all the way down to canoes,
coming in from the swamp, or up or down the river from one of the outlying villages,
or just darting around on mysterious business of their own.  How could you tell who
was "acting normally"?
     "We're all supposed to watch for a green houseboat with a patched tarp over the
roof," Marian went on.  "If it goes on by, that's fine, but if it tries to land
anywhere along here," she hesitated, "well, we're to treat it like a proven enemy.
That's the order, anyway."
     "There it is!"  Faceless watched for a moment.  "Yes, that must be it, just
coming into sight around the coal barge."  The boat was barely moving, drifting with
the current; although one man stood at the stern sweep, he was steering rather than
driving the boat ahead.  He was keeping it well out into the center of the river,
too.  She tracked its slow progress down the river, sometimes losing sight of it for
a moment as it passed one of the larger barges.  At no point did it swerve closer to
the shore--either shore--or change its speed.  A false alarm....
     A faint movement, barely glimpsed from the corner of her eye.  Her gaze raced
back to the palace.  HAD something moved, something that should be there?  Something
along the waterline...something near the lower end where there was a low watergate
into the palace grounds.  Into the dungeons, more likely, but it must connect
     Her crossbow moved without her conscious thought.  The string slapped against
the arms and a bolt sped across and downward.  Faceless dropped another bolt into the
slot and searched the shore again while she levered back the heavy bowstring.
     "What was it?" Marian asked, peering across the river as intently.  "I don't
     "I'm not sure, but something moved near the watergate.  Could've been a muskrat,
but what if it wasn't?"
     "You're thinking someone might have dropped over the side of the boat where we
couldn't see?"  The older woman was already signaling to one of the other gladiators
on watch.
     The signal was relayed with mirrors, and presently a shape moved in the shadow
behind the watergate.  Opened it.  Two men in the uniform of Royal Guards stepped
through and looked around.  One knelt and reached into the water, dragging a body to
the surface.  Faceless could see her bolt sticking out of the man's back.
     "Good work," Marian muttered.

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 488): MURGEN of THE BLACK COMPANY (Darkfist, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 374): TOOFLESS of GLORY BOUND TROLLS (DeGotti, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 493): THOR of AESIR (Buri, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 489): G.A. CUSTER of DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 488): SUX0R of MORE NEW TEAMS 2 (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 492): DARK THUNDER of DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 489): ADAM of MORGAN'S BOYS (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 484): SHYLAYLA MINOR of PRAETORIAN GUARD (Shocking Toad, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 476): CADEX CFM of THE BIKE SHOP (Malaquar, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 474): TAISHO of YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 448): TARGEN of IRON TIGERS (Jinx, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 439): NUTCRACKER of ALL FINESSE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 191): ZOOLANDER of WITLESS WONDERS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 426): PROBLEMATIC of FLAGG'S FIVE (Flagg, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 374): TSOMEGH of DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 177): RUBBER BULLET of USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 165): MACAULIFFE of THE EXPLORERS (Kellog, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 324): DOZER of THE DEN OF SWORDS (TMoney, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 142): MISSY MAYHAM of ANGELS OF CHAOS (Lord Chaos, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 367): LARGE SPINNY GUY of DIABLO TOO from TI (The Muffin Man)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 488): THE BLACK COMPANY (Darkfist, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 374): THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 493): THE NUKES (Fusion, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 489): DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 488): THE TAKEN (Silver Stroke, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 492): BATTLE BEASTS (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 489): SUGAR AND SPICE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 484): TOWNSVILLAINS (The Narrator, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 476): none
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 474): YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 448): BLITZKRIEG (Polarius, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 439): ALL FINESSE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 191): CHEAP SHOTS (?, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 426): COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 374): ALL-UGLY TEAM (The Sentinel, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 177): USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 165): THE EXPLORERS (Kellog, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 324): SRETSAMLEUD (Phat Phat, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 142): EPOCHOLYPSE (Brewmaster, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 367): DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 488): MURGEN of THE BLACK COMPANY (Darkfist, mgr.)
                            MUMPHY CHICK of LEGENDS OF STEELE (Doc Steele, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 493): THOR of AESIR (Buri, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 489): G.A. CUSTER of DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 492): DARK THUNDER of DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)
                (turn 491): SPONGEBOB of BATTLE BEASTS (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 488): JAKUCHU ITO of NINJAS (Shocking Toad, mgr.)
                           RAISON D'ETRE of BATHTUB ARMADA (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 484): SHYLAYLA MINOR of PRAETORIAN GUARD (Shocking Toad, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 476): HE HATE ME of WASTELAND (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
                            PEON NECROMANCER of SRETSAMLEUD (Phat Phat, mgr.)
                (turn 475): NEOSPHINCTER of WASTELAND (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 474): VEG-O-MATIC of TRANSGRESSORS (?, mgr.)
               (turn 475): TSUNAMI of STORM WARNING (Abarsis, the Slaughter Priest)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 438): HEBEE of ALL FINESSE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 191): ZOOLANDER of WITLESS WONDERS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 425): SNAPPY GEORGE of COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 373): DROGOI of DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 142): MISSY MAYHAM of ANGELS OF CHAOS (Lord Chaos, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

All Hail Lord Protector Thor!!!

     It's been a long time coming, since I took a three year hiatus.  As a result,
I've kind of lost track of his exact skill count.  His stats are 11(13)-5-11-21-15-6-
15, started Expert Attack and finished with Advanced Master Attack, AdEx in Init and
Decis, Expert Parry (fav learn), and favorite weapon in the Maul.  I know what many
of you are thinking, this rollup would have made a better LU, SL, ST...perhaps true,
but y'know what?  I've already graduated Strikers, Slashers, and Lungers with similar
or better stats.  My other non-retired Basher in ADM is a size 3, so when I saw this
guy I wanted a Basher and made it so.  Point being, there is no right or wrong way to
create a fighter, as long as it satisfies you.


                                      SPY REPORT

     If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of 
OSKSI brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too.  Later days, THE NUKES, since SIMPLY 
DESSERTS took top team from you this turn, you guys are old news.  Now let's all 
watch AESIR's heads swell from their 4-1-0 this turn.  Haa ha ha ha!  Big shots, big 
talk, big deal.  Of course, we're all terribly impressed to see FREDDY FUNGUS win a 
fight and gain 22 points, terribly.  Tsk, tsk, FREDDY FUNGUS beat WOLF SPIDER and 
WOLF SPIDER lost 18 points.  You're breakin' my heart.  WHIP SCORPION challenged 
OSKSI's Duelmaster for a shot at the throne.  And if variety is the spice of life, 
OSKSI may be getting bland, as THOR stays top dog in the city.  Kickbacks and bribes, 
kickbacks and bribes, how else do you think some of these guys win their fights?  
Skill?  Ha!   
     Well, let's take a look at some more misdeeds of you miserable sword-boys.  
OSKSI, I am losing what little hope I had in you.  SIMPLY DESSERTS the most avoided 
team?  What insult will suffice, I cannot say.  And it looks like THE NUKES avoided 
them the most this turn.  What a pack of would be losers, if you ask me.  Hmph.  THE 
GOALIE was challenged more times this turn than the Duelmaster.  Now was the DM 
insulted or feared?  Heh, heh.  I guess I can give a little credit to HARALDUR of 
AESIR for challenging up by 19 to GRAPH.  HARALDUR won to get 86 points of 
     Death and Taxes.  The less death I see, the more it taxes my patience.  Let's 
see if anyone's dead or dying.  And what a stunning loss we have here, boys and 
girls, DEEANN RAKOVICH of AMERICAN APPRAISAL has added the final loss to hers 9-11-0. 
Tee hee!  Titanium shields and bamboo daggers, guess what brave team is developing 
these kinds of weapons?   
     What does the OSKSI arena have in common with the inns?  It's just as 
comfortable to sleep in either place.  Ha ha ha ha!  Phlllt!  Just had to do that 
before I leave the fine city of OSKSI.  I feel much better now.  Paste this one in 
your scrapbooks, you'll need the kindling come this winter-- Snide Clemens  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DREUBRA 6092                 16  14  0   102       THE BALROGS (121)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FANDRAL 5701                 14   7  0    95       AESIR (164)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WHIP SCORPION 6275           13   6  0    89       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
 HARALDUR 6325                 8   2  0    86       AESIR (164)
 SIMEARTH 6155                21  18  0    81       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 TWITCH 6316                   7   4  0    80       THE NUKES (580)
 GRAPH 6073                   14  36  0    78       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 JOHN MAHER 6218              12  14  2    68       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DAT NGUYEN 6216              12  15  0    65       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
 SAND CRABS 6308               9   4  2    65       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
 BAENDIR 6124                  7   3  0    65       THE BALROGS II (560)
 DHADCIR 6127                  7   3  0    60       THE BALROGS II (560)
 NOT HOYLE 6208                8  19  0    59       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 FREDDY FUNGUS 6318            7   4  1    59       THE NUKES (580)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SUNBURN 6345                  4   1  1    56       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
 YROHK 6191                   11  10  0    53       THE BALROGS (121)
 ASISE 6126                    7   3  0    53       THE BALROGS II (560)
 WOLF SPIDER 6324              6   4  0    46       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
 WHELM 6261                    7   2  0    44       THE BALROGS (121)
 FROSTY 6314                   7   4  0    43       THE NUKES (580)
 SAPPHIRE STAR 6352            3   0  0    39       SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)
 EYOST 6125                    5   5  0    38       THE BALROGS II (560)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WHIPSNAKE 6344                4   1  0    33       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
 THE GOALIE 6229               3  22  0    31       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 LEFTISTS BLOW 6356            2   1  1    29       THE CONFUSED (584)
 M. MOORE 6354                 3   0  0    27       THE CONFUSED (584)
 GOMER 6326                    7   3  0    26       THE NUKES (580)
 CAOSTE 6128                   7   3  0    24       THE BALROGS II (560)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 AMOK 6228                     4  10  1    23       THE BALROGS (121)
 DEWEY 6363                    2   2  0    19       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 BAHAMA MAMMA 6350             2   1  0    10       SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)
 A. COLMES 6357                1   2  0     9       THE CONFUSED (584)
 JEFF DONKLE 6391              1   0  0     9       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
 THE FRENCH 6358               0   3  0     7       THE CONFUSED (584)
 DROMI 6408                    1   0  0     3       AESIR (164)
 ERIC WEITZER 6392             0   1  0     1       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
ZIPPY 6407             0  1 0 AESIR 164             HIGH ELF 623          494 NONE    
DEEANN RAKOVICH 6254   9 12 0 AMERICAN APPRAISA 559 SAND CRABS 6308       494         
MARIA FU 6360          0  2 0 AMERICAN APPRAISA 559 SUNBURN 6345          492         
YU KIDDIN 6393         0  1 0 THE BALROGS 121       SPYMASTER 626         494 NONE    
SPIT 6401              0  1 0 THE NUKES 580         BANDIT PRINCE 629     494 NONE    

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
RAINING PAYNE 6349     1  1 0 SUICIDAL DREAMS 583   LEFTISTS BLOW 6356    493         
BLACKJACK 6353         0  1 0 SUICIDAL DREAMS 583   H. CLINTON 6355       492 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Bookie -- Don't be too critical of conservative ideas.  Conservative ideas are a huge
part of what makes our country great.  From Reagan defeating Communism to W. being
willing to go against world opinion to try to make our country safer, we owe a lot to
conservatives and conservative ideas.  Don't get me wrong, I think there have been
some good liberal Presidents.  I just don't like having a President, Senator, or
Congressman who looks to the rest of the world and apologizes for being an American.
We are the greatest nation in the history of this planet.  And I dare say that
Conservative ideas that preserve our heritage are a big reason why. -- Polarius

Hey, Raining Payne, I bet that hurt worse than what you did to me. -- Leftists BLOW!
P.S.  Awesome, ain't it?  LOL!

It doesn't get any better than this Bookie, You AVOID me after my first turn, you the
launch a 9 point DOWN CHALLENGE on my 0-1-0 fighter who you already beat only to see
your attacker DIE.  Hahaha.  In your honor H. Clinton's replacement shall henceforth
be known as Bookie!
P.S.  I leave it to "The Confused" to name call as they have no other message!
Shocking Toad, the Wise and Great Ruler of "The Confused."

I do smell funny and I stink on the sands of Alastari.  As if it were an Asteroid
hitting Paris I shall visit the Dark Arena to save Osksi from my stench and the world
from my Hypocrisy and support of Evil! -- The French

Sapphire Star -- If you REALLY have suicidal dreams, as your team name indicates, you
wouldn't fight so hard! -- The Goalie

M. Chardinee does not compute.  He is not on my chart.  I don't WANT him on my chart.
-- Graph

The Veteran Mercenary is evolutionarily challenged.  I like that in a standby. --

Gomer -- Your efforts were....  Wait a minute.  Bathtub?  MY bathtub has monsters in
it?  Since when?  Who allowed this?  This is definitely... Not Hoyle!

A. Colmes -- Learn the system, son, and you can find anything. -- Dewey

Bookie -- If you find the sands turning red, perhaps you have the wrong color of
sunglasses?  Hi. -- Nick, Games Library

16 January 2004
                                    CHAOTIC WINDS
     Once, long ago, the four Winds of Time descended upon Alastari like a TEMPEST of
epic proportions, they slew everything within their all-encompassing reach.  They
left nothing.  In their wake lay smoldering ruins.
     In their haste they sped towards the center of this great land like a colossal
giant would step across an ocean.  The four storms picked up momentum on their way
towards each other.  A collision was eminent.
     The first storm wind, the oldest and wisest of the four was named APEXALUS.  The
second, FLAGGSTAFF, was the quickest and loudest entity ever created.  The third Wind
of Time was MATRIATIN, neither old or young, quick or slow, but fierce and feisty all
the same.  The forth wind, ASSAMITHIUS, the youngest yet most creative in its means
of destruction.
     When finally they merged at the center of ALASTARI, an incredible destructive
explosion occurred.  And when the smoke and debris cleared they were one.  CHAOS was
     And Chaos spread across the diminished lands reeking havoc and doom with its
passing, and destroying allover again that which already lay in ruin.

F E A R    C H A O S    I N C.

28 January 2004
All -- I send out this invitation to all teams and managers.  A new Alliance has been
formed.  The Living Essences Alliance is being formed to join forces in an effort to
eliminate common foes and to help the joined warriors grow and learn to the best of
their abilities by offering suggestions and advice.  It doesn't matter what arena
you're in, or if you're in another alliance already, as of today.  This Alliance is
open to one and all!  If you are interested in joining, please DIPLO me, or send a
personal ad to DM 93's newsletter.  If you wish to join beyond March 2004, send a PA
to DM 82.  Come join the fun! -- Dagan LifeGiver, mgr. Shadow Warriors (DM 93)

28 January 2004
This notice is to formally introduce our young alliance, CHAOS INC.  We consist of
APEX, FLAGG, MATRIX, ASSAMITE, and now RUDE BUDDHA.  If we aren't already there, we
WILL be coming to an arena near you soon!  Hope to see you all at the ZALCON II.

4 February 2004
Greeting from Jhans, DM 36 -- In 2 turns the kLk will host our first annual "St.
Valentines Day Massacre" in Jhans, arena 36.  (Kill Contest)  The contest will begin
on turn 450.  It will run for 10 turns.  On turn 461 the winners will be announced.
There will be 3 separate categories, the team with the most kills, the alliance with
the most kills, and the warrior with the most kills.  For the manager of the team
with the most kills a PRIZE of 10 ROLL-UPS will be rewarded (or $50 deposited into
his account).  No need to declare yourself in the personals.  If you are in DM 36,
you will be part of the contest whether you like it or not.  We encourage as much
trash talk as you'd like.  All teams, managers, and alliances invited.  Please
contact Polarius (mgr. of Blitzkrieg) in DM 36 with questions.  Or you can email me
at jamieptmo@hotmail.com.  Good luck and see you in the sands. -- Polarius

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

ZIPPY was butchered by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
SPIT was slaughtered by BANDIT PRINCE in a 2 minute gruesome Dark Arena battle.
YU KIDDIN was murdered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute gruesome Dark Arena fight.
DAT NGUYEN was devastated by SUNBURN in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud contest.
WHIP SCORPION was overpowered by THOR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
FANDRAL devastated SIMEARTH in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
HARALDUR devastated GRAPH in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
SAND CRABS easily killed DEEANN RAKOVICH in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
SAPPHIRE STAR vanquished THE GOALIE in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
GOMER won victory over DEWEY in a action packed 4 minute Challenge fight.
BAHAMA MAMMA won victory over THE FRENCH in a 3 minute novice's Challenge fight.
DREUBRA overpowered TWITCH in a popular 1 minute one-sided Title melee.
JOHN MAHER subdued ASISE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.
DHADCIR viciously subdued CAPTURED ORC in a 2 minute brutal battle.
WOLF SPIDER was bested by FREDDY FUNGUS in a 1 minute bout.
BAENDIR handily defeated FROSTY in a action packed 1 minute one-sided conflict.
EYOST was overpowered by NOT HOYLE in a 1 minute uneven struggle.
YROHK overcame CAPTURED ORC in a 1 minute bloody master vs. amateur bout.
WHIPSNAKE defeated CAOSTE in a 2 minute bout.
WHELM subdued DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 3 minute bout.
AMOK was beaten by LEFTISTS BLOW in a popular 2 minute bloody match.
M. MOORE devastated PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
A. COLMES was narrowly defeated by JEFF DONKLE in a 4 minute novice's duel.
ERIC WEITZER was outlasted by DROMI in a dull 8 minute beginner's fray.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  7         TOTAL PARRY       12 -   8 -  2      60  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   7         PARRY-RIPOSTE     16 -  12 -  0      57  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         AIMED BLOW        13 -  10 -  0      57  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         SLASHING ATTACK    5 -   4 -  1      56  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   4         STRIKING ATTACK   36 -  29 -  3      55  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    4         PARRY-LUNGE       11 -  12 -  0      48  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         BASHING ATTACK    20 -  22 -  2      48  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         LUNGING ATTACK    30 -  36 -  2      45  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         WALL OF STEEL      8 -  14 -  0      36  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-STRIKE       5 -   9 -  0      36  |

Turn 494 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  4         3  STRIKING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  3         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  3         1  PARRY-STRIKE   
SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  1                                       1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  3                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
AIMED BLOW         2 -  2                                       1  PARRY-LUNGE    
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  2                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 
                                                                1  AIMED BLOW     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-STRIKE     DREUBRA 6092               16  14  0  102 THE BALROGS (121)
STRIKING ATTACK  FANDRAL 5701               14   7  0   95 AESIR (164)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    WHIP SCORPION 6275         13   6  0   89 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
WALL OF STEEL    SIMEARTH 6155              21  18  0   81 GAMES LIBRARY (340)
LUNGING ATTACK   SAND CRABS 6308             9   4  2   65 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
AIMED BLOW       BAENDIR 6124                7   3  0   65 THE BALROGS II (560)
SLASHING ATTACK  DHADCIR 6127                7   3  0   60 THE BALROGS II (560)
PARRY-LUNGE      FREDDY FUNGUS 6318          7   4  1   59 THE NUKES (580)
TOTAL PARRY      WHELM 6261                  7   2  0   44 THE BALROGS (121)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is DREUBRA 6092.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was DEWEY 6363.  The ten other most popular fighters were LEFTISTS BLOW 6356, DHADCIR 
6218, FREDDY FUNGUS 6318, YROHK 6191, and A. COLMES 6357.

The least popular fighter this week was DROMI 6408.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were ERIC WEITZER 6392, JEFF DONKLE 6391, CAOSTE 6128, FROSTY 6314, WOLF 
SPIDER 6324, GOMER 6326, THE GOALIE 6229, DEEANN RAKOVICH 6254, GRAPH 6073, and 

The following warriors have traveled to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after fighting this turn:

THOR (3-5672) AESIR (164)