Date   : 02/26/2004    Duedate: 03/10/2004


DM-3    TURN-495

This Weeks Top Honors


(3-6275) [14-6-0,101]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

(3-6275) [14-6-0,101]          (3-6352) [4-0-0,61]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

GRAPH                          THE GOALIE
GAMES LIBRARY (340)            GAMES LIBRARY (340)
(3-6073) [15-36-0,91]          (3-6229) [4-22-0,35]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)       37
2. THE CONFUSED (584)          33      THE NUKES (580)
3. SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)       23      Unchartered Team
5. AESIR (164)                 10      SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 2 THE BALROGS II (560)      33  17  0 66.0   1/ 1 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)    10  5 1
 2/ 1*SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)      7   4  0 63.6   2/ 2 AESIR (164)               8  7 0
 3/ 3 THE NUKES (580)           33  25  2 56.9   3/ 4*THE CONFUSED (584)        7  7 1
 4/ 4 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)    136 104  9 56.7   4/ 6 GAMES LIBRARY (340)       7  8 0
 5- 5 THE BALROGS (121)        530 445 22 54.4   5/ 3 THE NUKES (580)           6  9 0
 6/ 6*THE CONFUSED (584)        10   9  2 52.6   6/ 5*SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)     4  3 0
 7/ 7 AESIR (164)              542 548 39 49.7   7/ 8 AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)  4  9 0
 8/ 8 GAMES LIBRARY (340)      328 510  8 39.1   8- 7 THE BALROGS (121)         3  2 0
 9/ 9 AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)  73 118  3 38.2   9- 9 THE BALROGS II (560)      2  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

            + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Out of the Past #2 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +


     If anyone was aware of a difference in the air of the city, or in the texture of
life and death in the arena, they did not mention it.  Of course, with a stranger
holding a wizard's staff and guarded by...some kind of monsters sitting in the
arenamaster's box, who was going to mention things, even if they DID notice?
     And who, dying messily in the Dark Arena, would mention strange lights and
unexplained whistling noises?  If Arenamaster Kai saw fit to lay down pentagrams and
other designs of colored sand on the arena floor before each fight...well, he WAS the
arenamaster.  No doubt he knew what he was doing.
     It was known that a few managers intended to protest that they had not ordered
the actual, literal death of their warriors, but only formal dismissal from the
gladiatorial system.  But when they came back from the arenamaster's office, they
looked pale and shaken, and they had nothing to tell anyone about the situation.  And
one or two of them didn't come back at all.
                      ***     *****     ***     *****     ***
     "There IS something going on," Penok muttered to Jessie June as they waited in
the ready area for their fight to be called.  "Something bad.  I can feel it in my
bones.  I don't care what the Rau says."  She jerked her head sideways slightly,
indicating Tijiss Rau, the arena steward waiting in the archway just ahead of them.
     "You know Rau," Jessie June muttered back.  "'All for the best in the best of
all possible worlds', that's Rau.  He wouldn't know 'something bad' if he ate it for
dinner and got sick right after."  She eyed the crystals set into the wall of the
arena.  About a third of them were black, the rest were blood red.  They reminded her
of the eyes of spiders.  "If those are purely ornamental, I'll eat 'em."
     "Magic," Cane Toad said flatly, coming up behind the two women.  "Blood magic.
You can smell it in the air.  At least, I can.  There's a lot of it down south where
I come from, and I'd know that smell anywhere."
     "I thought all magic was screwed up because of the Chaos and the Arcanum and
all!" Penok protested.
     The poisonous Toad shook his head firmly.  "Not blood magic.  You spill enough
blood, nothing else matters."
     "And there's always a lot of blood spilled in the arena," Jessie June whispered,
horrified at the possibilities.
     "And the arena's been bloodier since those crystals went up," Cane Toad said.
"There's something bad going down here."


     Hallie O'Dene went overland from Andoria to the Delarquan Federation.  It might
have been faster to sail--if she could have found a ship going where she needed to
go, or hired one.  But she found herself distrusting the Trier.  The mage Khaldren
had come out of the Trier, after all.  He might have some power over it.  And he was
bound to notice that she and Raoul hadn't come back from the errand he'd commanded.
But these were all logical reasons that she had arrived at to explain her decision to
herself.  In fact, she simply hadn't trusted the Trier at an instinctive level.  She
made her way on foot along the coast to Gelafan, then hired horses as needed for a
fast ride south.  Well...fast!  She might have laughed if she hadn't been so worried.
Six days to Valamantis.  What horrors might the mad wizard have accomplished in six
     Her plan was to take a riverboat up the Feyranse past Mordant to Sibikhas, and
then go by horse again to Delarq Tor.
     But there were towers behind Valamantis, where no towers had been for hundreds
of years.  They had none of the dream-like unreality of the vision towers that
Khaldren had raised over Zorpunt, and that was alarming.  Valamantis was much older
than Zorpunt.  There had once BEEN towers--it was called Old Valamantis now, and it
was in ruins except for the arena where the Bloodgames were held.  On that thought,
Hallie froze briefly, horrified by the realization that there had been Bloodgames
recently, lakes of blood spilled on that ancient soil.  What might Khaldren have
conjured out of that?  She didn't think she wanted to know.

Aruak City:

     The return of a wizard from drowned Krael was news that should reach Andor as
quickly as possible.  It took Raoul two days to reach Aruak City from Zorpunt, longer
than he would have liked, but faster than he had feared.  The Aruaki countryside had
suffered badly during the civil war and from the Chaos contamination just before
that.  People were getting it back into shape now, but there were no horses to be
rented or bought.  Or stolen, come to that.  Walking was faster than riding a plow
horse would've been, even if he could've gotten hold of one of the plowhorses.
     But he was damned glad to see the towers (most of the towers, some were nothing
but stumps) of Aruak city ahead.  He compared their slightly battered appearance with
the towers of Khaldren's Zorpunt and found this much better.  This was REAL.  Maybe
not perfect, maybe not as beautiful as a dream, but real.  He'd take this over the
perfect illusion any day.
     His first goal in the city was the Bulldog Inn.  He needed news, he needed to
contact his manager, and he wanted to alert Adie, the manager of the Tuft Tuggers, to
the danger.  Adie was a magician of some kind--he'd never bothered with the details--
and she could be an important part of the opposition to the Kraelian.  EARLY
opposition, too, before the man got entrenched in Zorpunt.  That might make a
     The Inn was jammed.  Odd, that.  Aruak City had always had a vigorous dueling
community, but...this many gladiators?  He could barely SEE across the common room,
much less move quickly.  But there was a table of managers in an alcove at the back.
He'd find news there, if he could reach it.
     The Lord Protector took a last look at the crowd, shook his head, and plunged in
under the elbow of a Shew.  The man was too tall for most managers, but there were
always one or two who would give a large gladiator a chance.  From the looks of the
scars, this man had been at it a while, but he was nobody Raoul recognized.  Well,
he'd been away for a long time.  Quite a long time, actually.
     He paused and looked toward the woman whose hand was on his sleeve.  Hair like a
sunrise and wide violet eyes.  "Lady Adeolar!  You're one of the people I wanted to
find.  There--"
     "Not here in the middle of the floor, Raoul."  She drew him to one side and
through an inconspicuous door.  "Jhordeal will be glad to know you are well, but
that's not what you came for, is it?"
     "Glad to know I'm...?"  When had he been in Aruak City last?  Mantor, it was
years ago!  Before the civil war, and he had died....  He took off his hat, looked at
the rounded, dusty crown, ran a hand over his head, and put the hat back on.  No time
to go into that now.  "No, doll, that's not why I came this way.  There's magical
trouble.  Serious magical trouble, I think."
     "You came from Zorpunt?"  She twisted a lock of hair between nervous fingers.
"I have felt something happening there--something dark--"
     He nodded briefly.  "I saw it start, and it's going to be damned dark," he
muttered.  Quickly, he sketched in what he and Hallie had learned of the wizard
Khaldren and his intentions.  "I don't know how he's doing that much magic," he
finished, "because everyone says the Arcanum is in decline and spells aren't working,
     "He's using blood magic."  The woman's beautiful face hardened.  "It is the
oldest magic and the most primitive.  Almost always used for darkness and
destruction," she muttered, frowning, "even though it doesn't have to be....  It's
the least dependent on the Arcanum, unfortunately, the easiest to pervert, and the
hardest to control once it gets started."  She frowned, twisting the lock of hair
harder.  "In the hands of a powerful wizard with no scruples...."
     "That's what me and Hallie figured," Raoul said, nodding.  "I'm headed for
Andor--the king has to be warned.  And Hallie's taking the warning to Delarq Tor."
     "Yes, of course.  Definitely the right thing to do.  But you need to see your
manager before you leave town, Raoul.  He's been worried about you."  She patted his
arm absently, still frowning.  "I will gather as much information about this wizard
and his spells as I can....  I wish Shania were here, she is so good at that.  Well,
I must work with what I have."  She patted his arm one last time and opened the door
to the inn's main room.  "Off with you, and tell the other managers that...tell them
I have things to do, and I'll add to your news later."

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 489): FACELESS of THE BLACK COMPANY (Darkfist, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 374): TOOFLESS of GLORY BOUND TROLLS (DeGotti, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 494): DREUBRA of THE BALROGS (Poppa Balrog, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 490): MARCH MADNESS of SPORTZ! (Guardian, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 489): DERBIE FOYLE of THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 493): MEDUSA of BATTLE BEASTS (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 490): RED NO. 40 of WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 485): AERYN SUN of FARSCAPE (Keldon Blackfang, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 476): CADEX CFM of THE BIKE SHOP (Malaquar, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 475): TAISHO of YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 449): TARGEN of IRON TIGERS (Jinx, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 440): NUTCRACKER of ALL FINESSE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 191): ZOOLANDER of WITLESS WONDERS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 427): PROBLEMATIC of FLAGG'S FIVE (Flagg, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 375): TSOMEGH of DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 178): RUBBER BULLET of USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 166): DUFF of ISLANDERS (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 325): HOLLY MACKEREL of FISH MONGERS (Ghoti, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 143): 2 PHAT TOO of VERMIN (Sultan, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 368): LARGE SPINNY GUY of DIABLO TOO from TI (The Muffin Man)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 489): THE BLACK COMPANY (Darkfist, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 374): THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 494): SIMPLY DESSERTS (Sweet Tooth, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 490): DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 489): THE TAKEN (Silver Stroke, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 493): DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 490): SUGAR AND SPICE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 485): SIR AGLIO (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 476): none
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 475): SONS OF SATAN (Damion, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 449): BLITZKRIEG (Polarius, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 440): ALL FINESSE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 191): CHEAP SHOTS (?, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 427): FLAGG'S FIVE (Flagg, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 375): DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 178): USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 166): THE EXPLORERS (Kellog, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 325): THE DEN OF SWORDS (TMoney, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 143): EPOCHOLYPSE (Brewmaster, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 368): DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 488): MURGEN of THE BLACK COMPANY (Darkfist, mgr.)
                            MUMPHY CHICK of LEGENDS OF STEELE (Doc Steele, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 493): THOR of AESIR (Buri, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 489): G.A. CUSTER of DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 493): DELAPP of NIGHT TRAIN (BPR, mgr.)
                (turn 492): DARK THUNDER of DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 490): RED NO. 40 of WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 485): AERYN SUN of FARSCAPE (Keldon Blackfang, mgr.)
               (turn 484): SHYLAYLA MINOR of PRAETORIAN GUARD (Shocking Toad, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 476): HE HATE ME of WASTELAND (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
                            PEON NECROMANCER of SRETSAMLEUD (Phat Phat, mgr.)
                (turn 475): NEOSPHINCTER of WASTELAND (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 475): JADE of I MAGI (Street Legal, mgr.)
               (turn 474): VEG-O-MATIC of TRANSGRESSORS (?, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 191): ZOOLANDER of WITLESS WONDERS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 427): PROBLEMATIC of FLAGG'S FIVE (Flagg, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 375): TSOMEGH of DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 142): MISSY MAYHAM of ANGELS OF CHAOS (Lord Chaos, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of 
OSKSI brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too.  Of course, we're all terribly 
impressed to see SAPPHIRE STAR win a fight and gain 22 points, terribly.  Tsk, tsk, 
SAPPHIRE STAR beat FREDDY FUNGUS and FREDDY FUNGUS lost 19 points.  You're breakin' 
my heart.  Due to absence, and inability to defend the throne, DREUBRA has lost the 
Title of Duelmaster.  Start setting that alarm earlier!  And it's out with the old, 
in with the new, as WHIP SCORPION takes the Title and last week's bar tab from the 
old Duelmaster.  Heh, heh.  I'm not in a very good mood today, but why am I telling 
you this?  You want to know what's new, don't you, OSKSI?   
     He who fights and runs away will live to fight another day, the coward.  
AMERICAN APPRAISAL, I suppose you'll be glad to know you were this turn's most 
avoided team.  Care to know who is the most afraid of you?  And it looks like THE 
NUKES avoided them the most this turn.  What a pack of would be losers, if you ask 
me.  Hmph.  NOT HOYLE was challenged more times this turn than the Duelmaster.  Now 
was the DM insulted or feared?  Heh, heh.  ERIC WEITZER was challenged by one of THE 
CONFUSED's warriors this turn, with LEFTISTS BLOW having a lead of 28 points going 
into the fight.  Question now is, will OSKSI accept this sort of tacky behavior?  
LEFTISTS BLOW beating ERIC WEITZER.  The insult, the....yech!  I guess I can give a 
little credit to BAHAMA MAMMA of SUICIDAL DREAMS for challenging up by 21 to THE 
GOALIE.  BAHAMA MAMMA lost to get 11 points of recognition.   
     Some people like volunteer work in the hospitals.  I volunteer for OSKSI's 
morgue.  More variety.  We're all going to die in the end, so why worry if the fate 
catches up with you sooner that later?   
     There's got to be a better place in OSKSI to get a drink than The Elefont!  Any 
suggestions?  Well, I've had enough of this drivel, and I'm sure you have too.  Off 
like a dirty shirt of padded leather.  Glad to see the back of this place-- Snide 

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WHIP SCORPION 6275           14   6  0   101       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DREUBRA 6092                 16  14  0   102       THE BALROGS (121)
 FANDRAL 5701                 15   7  0    99       AESIR (164)
 GRAPH 6073                   15  36  0    91       GAMES LIBRARY (340)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DAT NGUYEN 6216              13  15  0    85       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
 SIMEARTH 6155                21  19  0    82       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 HARALDUR 6325                 8   3  0    79       AESIR (164)
 SAND CRABS 6308              10   4  2    78       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
 TWITCH 6316                   7   5  0    69       THE NUKES (580)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SUNBURN 6345                  5   1  1    66       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
-BAENDIR 6124                  7   3  0    65       THE BALROGS II (560)
 JOHN MAHER 6218              12  15  2    63       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
 SAPPHIRE STAR 6352            4   0  0    61       SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DHADCIR 6127                  7   3  0    60       THE BALROGS II (560)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WOLF SPIDER 6324              7   4  0    54       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
-YROHK 6191                   11  10  0    53       THE BALROGS (121)
 FROSTY 6314                   8   4  0    53       THE NUKES (580)
-ASISE 6126                    7   3  0    53       THE BALROGS II (560)
 NOT HOYLE 6208                8  20  0    48       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
-WHELM 6261                    7   2  0    44       THE BALROGS (121)
 FREDDY FUNGUS 6318            7   5  1    40       THE NUKES (580)
-EYOST 6125                    5   5  0    38       THE BALROGS II (560)
 THE GOALIE 6229               4  22  0    35       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 GOMER 6326                    8   3  0    34       THE NUKES (580)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LEFTISTS BLOW 6356            3   1  1    33       THE CONFUSED (584)
 WHIPSNAKE 6344                4   2  0    27       SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
 A. COLMES 6357                2   2  0    25       THE CONFUSED (584)
-CAOSTE 6128                   7   3  0    24       THE BALROGS II (560)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-AMOK 6228                     4  10  1    23       THE BALROGS (121)
 M. MOORE 6354                 3   1  0    22       THE CONFUSED (584)
 DROMI 6408                    2   0  0    12       AESIR (164)
 BOOKIE 6394                   1   0  0    12       THE CONFUSED (584)
 BAHAMA MAMMA 6350             2   2  0    11       SUICIDAL DREAMS (583)
 DEWEY 6363                    2   3  0     9       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 JEFF DUNKLE 6391              1   1  0     4       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
 ERIC WEITZER 6392             0   2  0     2       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
 COREY SPANKE 6412             0   1  0     1       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
LOOSER 6411            0  1 0 AESIR 164             WURM KIN 631          495 NONE    
LOSER 6410             0  1 0 AESIR 164             STONE GOLEM 630       495 NONE    
DEEANN RAKOVICH 6254   9 12 0 AMERICAN APPRAISA 559 SAND CRABS 6308       494         
MARIA FU 6360          0  2 0 AMERICAN APPRAISA 559 SUNBURN 6345          492         
THE FRENCH 6358        0  4 0 THE CONFUSED 584      SPYMASTER 626         495 NONE    
SLAG 6409              0  1 0 THE NUKES 580         SPYMASTER 626         495 NONE    
RAINING PAYNE 6349     1  1 0 SUICIDAL DREAMS 583   LEFTISTS BLOW 6356    493         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Hey, Bookie -- You got a nice roll-up so I don't think I'll feed you to a Troll, an
Orc, or a Spymaster just yet. -- Shocking Toad, The Manager

Bookie's a COWARD.  Hahahahaha, I killed Raining Payne on his Down Challenge and the
Lefty manager hasn't the courage to Blood Feud.  My name says it all. -- Leftists

Aaa Weee, That was in Error!  I was to fight a monster, not a Mama from Bahama.  Zee
managerie known as a Frog with Electricity gave me Halberd even though I lunge and no
have Strungf or Dextrousity to use it.  Zee Frog (no, not me and my people, common
mistake) with Electricity will definitely killith me now!  Bye bye. -- The French

Polarius -- Good to hear honesty from an open mind.  Thank you! -- Shocking Toad
P.S.  I will give Kennedy to you as a successful Democrat in the past 60 years. 
Other than that though, sheesh, Democrats have really screwed up our country and have
failed miserably to protect us and our glorious way of life.

Hey Dewey, Bud, I'm tryin' but you gotta understand I am Confused, so much so that
even your easy and wondrous system eludes me. -- A. Colmes on FNC Weekdays at 9 PM.

All -- I'm sad to see my tourney prep time come to an end here in Osksi.  The arena's
been fun and I invite all of you to Jhans (DM 36), my home sweet home. -- Bookie

Goalie -- Just so you know, there's nothing personal 'bout the two challenges.  My
manager's a "win by any means" kinda guy (I heard Bookie even sent a 32 point down-
challenge to his mother once).  Thanks for the learns!  It was what I was after the
entire time. -- Sapphire Starr

Shocking Toad -- Talking awfully big for someone who's 3-3 against me, aren't you?
Yes, you've had two kills, but you actually strengthened my team instead of hurting
it.  Raining Payne was a freak 21 size/awesome damage basher.  He was cannon-fodder.
His replacement is a minimum (+3) AT basher.  Add that to the (+4) init aimed blow I
got for Blackjack and I'm actually quite happy.  Thanks for the help. *evil grin*  As
to your political views, I find you less a Shocking Toad and more the mindless sheep.
Tsk tsk.  Kinda sad, but I guess I expected too much of you.  If you want to carry
this further and if you're feelin' "froggy," why don't you hop your ass over to the
lilypad they call Jhans.  I'd be more than happy to give you an education in both
politics and managing--I see you need help with both. *evil grin* -- Bookie

The French -- A halberd?! *laugh*  A lunger with a halberd and your stats are THAT
far off?!  Bwahahaha. -- Bahamma Mamma

Polarius -- Despite your views, you're one of my best friends. *grin* I enjoy our
debates and knowing that you're WRONG makes me enjoy it oh so much more. *evil grin*
-- Bookie

Buri -- Good DM column and your point made.  Swords high! -- Bookie

Fandral -- Hmm, I think I need to work on the evolution of invincibility.... --

Harladur -- I knew it!  I could tell the minute I looked at you, you simply don't fit
any of the charts at all.  There should be a law against that! -- Graph

Sapphire Star -- You play a mean game of hardball, girl. -- The Goalie

Gomer -- Why am I glowing in the dark?  I admit this will make it easier to read the
cataloging numbers in the closed stacks, but still, it seems so OBVIOUS.... -- Dewey
P.S.  Overt, even.

Eyost -- (smugly)  Balrogs are... Not Hoyle

The Balrogs -- Good to see you back!  And what a return--right onto the throne. --

Buri -- Congratulations on the graduation of Thor. -- Nick, Games Library

28 January 2004
All -- I send out this invitation to all teams and managers.  A new Alliance has been
formed.  The Living Essences Alliance is being formed to join forces in an effort to
eliminate common foes and to help the joined warriors grow and learn to the best of
their abilities by offering suggestions and advice.  It doesn't matter what arena
you're in, or if you're in another alliance already, as of today.  This Alliance is
open to one and all!  If you are interested in joining, please DIPLO me, or send a
personal ad to DM 93's newsletter.  If you wish to join beyond March 2004, send a PA
to DM 82.  Come join the fun! -- Dagan LifeGiver, mgr. Shadow Warriors (DM 93)

28 January 2004
This notice is to formally introduce our young alliance, CHAOS INC.  We consist of
APEX, FLAGG, MATRIX, ASSAMITE, and now RUDE BUDDHA.  If we aren't already there, we
WILL be coming to an arena near you soon!  Hope to see you all at the ZALCON II.

4 February 2004
Greeting from Jhans, DM 36 -- In 2 turns the kLk will host our first annual "St.
Valentines Day Massacre" in Jhans, arena 36.  (Kill Contest)  The contest will begin
on turn 450.  It will run for 10 turns.  On turn 461 the winners will be announced.
There will be 3 separate categories, the team with the most kills, the alliance with
the most kills, and the warrior with the most kills.  For the manager of the team
with the most kills a PRIZE of 10 ROLL-UPS will be rewarded (or $50 deposited into
his account).  No need to declare yourself in the personals.  If you are in DM 36,
you will be part of the contest whether you like it or not.  We encourage as much
trash talk as you'd like.  All teams, managers, and alliances invited.  Please
contact Polarius (mgr. of Blitzkrieg) in DM 36 with questions.  Or you can email me
at jamieptmo@hotmail.com.  Good luck and see you in the sands. -- Polarius

25 February 2004
Readers, and especially those who volunteered warriors -- My apologies for the sudden
lack of episodes.  I've been sick, but expect to be back at the keyboard soon. -- the

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

THE FRENCH was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
SLAG was dealt death by SPYMASTER in a 2 minute brutal Dark Arena duel.
LOOSER was easily killed by WURM KIN in a 1 minute gory Dark Arena match.
LOSER was slaughtered by STONE GOLEM in a 3 minute Dark Arena brawl.
TWITCH was devastated by GRAPH in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
HARALDUR was demolished by WHIP SCORPION in a 1 minute Challenge Title competition.
DAT NGUYEN vanquished SIMEARTH in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
SAND CRABS overpowered JOHN MAHER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
SUNBURN overpowered NOT HOYLE in a action packed 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.
LEFTISTS BLOW vanquished ERIC WEITZER in a 1 minute gruesome uneven Challenge fight.
A. COLMES overpowered DEWEY in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
BAHAMA MAMMA was viciously subdued by THE GOALIE in a 6 minute Challenge bout.
FANDRAL devastated CONVICTED ASSASSIN in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
FREDDY FUNGUS was demolished by SAPPHIRE STAR in a 1 minute mismatched match.
FROSTY overpowered WHIPSNAKE in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
WOLF SPIDER overpowered AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
GOMER bested M. MOORE in a 3 minute expert vs. novice duel.
JEFF DUNKLE was viciously subdued by BOOKIE in a 2 minute gory amateur's brawl.
DROMI overpowered COREY SPANKE in a 3 minute one-sided match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  6         TOTAL PARRY       11 -   8 -  1      58  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   6         PARRY-RIPOSTE     16 -  12 -  0      57  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      4         STRIKING ATTACK   36 -  29 -  2      55  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         AIMED BLOW        13 -  11 -  0      54  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         PARRY-LUNGE       12 -  13 -  0      48  |
|AIMED BLOW                       2         BASHING ATTACK    19 -  21 -  2      48  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         LUNGING ATTACK    31 -  35 -  1      47  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      2         SLASHING ATTACK    5 -   6 -  1      45  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-STRIKE       5 -   9 -  0      36  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         WALL OF STEEL      7 -  15 -  0      32  |

Turn 495 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  2         4  STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  2     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  2         1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
AIMED BLOW         1 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  2         1  PARRY-STRIKE   
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  2                                       1  PARRY-LUNGE    
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  3                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  1                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  1                                       1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                                                                1  AIMED BLOW     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-RIPOSTE    WHIP SCORPION 6275         14   6  0  101 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
STRIKING ATTACK  FANDRAL 5701               15   7  0   99 AESIR (164)
WALL OF STEEL    SIMEARTH 6155              21  19  0   82 GAMES LIBRARY (340)
LUNGING ATTACK   SAND CRABS 6308            10   4  2   78 SIMPLY DESSERTS (555)
AIMED BLOW       FROSTY 6314                 8   4  0   53 THE NUKES (580)
PARRY-LUNGE      FREDDY FUNGUS 6318          7   5  1   40 THE NUKES (580)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is GRAPH 6073.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
THE GOALIE 6229.  The ten other most popular fighters were SUNBURN 6345, BOOKIE 6394, 
6350, FROSTY 6314, SLAG 6409, and GRAPH 6073.

The least popular fighter this week was GOMER 6326.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were WHIPSNAKE 6344, FREDDY FUNGUS 6318, DEWEY 6363, ERIC WEITZER 6392, JOHN 
MAHER 6218, SIMEARTH 6155, HARALDUR 6325, LOSER 6410, THE FRENCH 6358, and DROMI