DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 04/06/2006    Duedate: 04/19/2006

OSKSI ARENA

DM-3    TURN-550

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

FLAGPOLE PANTIES
FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
(3-5968) [10-4-1,106]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

FLAGPOLE PANTIES               PANACHE
FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)       COOL WORDS (601)
(3-5968) [10-4-1,106]          (3-6540) [2-0-0,22]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

OTIS                           HAPPY APPLE
FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)       FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
(3-6501) [11-7-2,73]           (3-6492) [11-7-2,101]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

GAMES LIBRARY (340)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. COOL WORDS (601)            46
2. FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)    33      FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
3. GAMES LIBRARY (340)         14      Unchartered Team
4. BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)     0
5. STL RAD (602)                0      COOL WORDS (601)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*COOL WORDS (601)           4   0  1  100   1/ 1 GAMES LIBRARY (340)       9  6 2
 2- 1 BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)  71  44  4 61.7   2/ 2 FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)  6  3 0
 3/ 2 FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253) 181 119 11 60.3   3- 3 BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)  5  4 0
 4- 4*STL RAD (602)              3   3  0 50.0   4/ 0*COOL WORDS (601)          3  0 1
 5/ 5 GAMES LIBRARY (340)      434 670 13 39.3   5- 4*STL RAD (602)             1  2 0
 6- 6*WIND STORM (423)           1   6  0 14.3   6- 6*WIND STORM (423)          1  6 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 541): MESSIAH of MANNEQUIN'S BEST (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 425): GOLDEN SHARK of THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 549): HEARTS of GAMES LIBRARY (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 545): FORK BALL of F BALLS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 544): SAMANTHA FOX of PARTY ANIMALS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 548): JUSTIN of THE LADY'S LIST (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 545): PINK NOSE of WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 540): SADIE of SPRINGBORN (Still, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 531): ODDLY SHAPED BOOB of CENTER FOR OLDS (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 530): SCYTHE of GRIM FANDANGO (Stik, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 504): OLIVE OYL of OLD SCHOOL TOONS (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 494): GROUCHO of U.A.K. (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 219): HOT AIR DUCK of DUCKS UNLIMITED (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 482): FOUR OF SPADES of COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 430): ZALGEI of DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 205): NICKLEBACK of MILLENIUM METAL (Street Legal, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 193): SOUL SCOURGE of VILE REAVERS (Bobby Bigfoot, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 379): DIED of SRETSAMLEUD (Phat Phat, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 170): 2 PHAT 2 of VERMIN (Sultan, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 423): BOB, ETERNAL of SANDS OF TIME from CLIFFHOME (The Muffin
                             Man, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 541): SWEORDMASTERS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 425): THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 549): GAMES LIBRARY (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 545): DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 544): SPORTS GREATS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 548): THE LADY'S LIST (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 545): WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 540): QUBIT (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 531): SHEPHERDS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 530): D.R.I. (Var, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 504): OLD SCHOOL TOONS (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 494): U.A.K. (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 219): CRIMINAL ELEMENT (Fizban, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 482): COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 430): RONIN (Rosebud, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 205): none
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 193): ISLANDERS (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 379): LEGION OF LEGEND (Seraphim, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 170): MILCHAMAH (Hammer, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 423): BLACK PRIMERS, etc. (Doc Steele, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 544): ALL LICKERED UP of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 544): NORLE PARTH of THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (Nick, mgr.)
               (turn 543): HOFFA of JOHNS (Dear, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 531): ODDLY SHAPED BOOB of CENTER FOR OLDS (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 504): OLIVE OYL of OLD SCHOOL TOONS (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 494): GROUCHO of U.A.K. (Otis the Drunk, mgr.)
                  (turn 493): HARANDUR of JINDA-BAN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 481): KANGAROO LIFEBOAT of COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 429): SPIDER-MAN of WENSINWASIN M.H. (Youngblood, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 204): SILVERBOLT of RUNNING AMOK (THawk, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 193): SOUL SCOURGE of VILE REAVERS (Bobby Bigfoot, mgr.)
                          WIMPIRA of ISLANDERS (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (170): MAKKEH KILLER of MILCHAMAH (Hammer, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Dear Pete, you have been cursed by your team name.  You need to speak to your
manager about this.  To call you Bumblers!  That is just asking for trouble.  And I
am sure you could do better, if you hadn't been impeded and BLOCKED by that
unfortunate name.

                                        Hearts

                                      SPY REPORT

     Hail OSKSI!  Warriors of the arena, prepare to be praised and blamed for your 
deeds.  And let's see, THE fought EMBEZZLING SCRIBE and gained 20 points and 
contributed to COOL WORDS' 3-0-1.  OTIS has lost to KUNG-FU MASTER, falling 11 
points, while helping make FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT a 4-1-0 turn.  And all eyes were on 
FLAGPOLE PANTIES this turn as he ascended to the throne of Duelmaster.  OSKSI has a 
new victor!  By the way, was that our Duelmaster that I saw last night, cramped under 
the table at The Elefont?   
     Oriental wise man once say, 'Hiding behind shields prevents proper sun tanning.' 
Inscrutable, but true.  I also notice that the BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES stable was the most 
avoided team this turn.  Come on OSKSI, what are you afraid of?  And avoiding BOMBAY 
BUMBLE BEES more than any other team we find FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT.  OSKSI, are we going 
to accept, or respect this sort of thing?   
     A coward dies a thousand deaths, a brave man only once.  Wise men know this to 
be true.  Is it really true that OSKSI has more dishwashers per capita that fighters? 
Just thought I'd ask...   
     Remember, blood on the purple robe does not change it from a purple robe.  Dare 
to fight bravely.  Always good to rest in OSKSI, but never good to wear out my 
welcome.  Look for me in future turns.  Until you see my quill in OSKSI again, 
farewell-- Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FLAGPOLE PANTIES 5968        10   4  1   106       FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-BUD SMITH 6022               14   2  2   112       BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)
 HAPPY APPLE 6492             11   7  2   101       FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
-DAT NGUYEN 6216              19  22  0    97       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
-TERRY MULHOLLAND 3747        15   3  0    94       BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DAVID CONE 5795              11   9  1    88       BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)
 HEARTS 6485                  17  26  1    87       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 OTIS 6589                     7   4  0    87       FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
-PETE HARNISCH 3750           19   9  0    84       BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)
 OTIS 6501                    11   7  2    73       FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
 ETERNAL D.J. 5931            14   7  0    71       FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 YATZEE 6568                   9   7  2    58       GAMES LIBRARY (340)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SHARAN KHOR 6561              8   8  0    54       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
 TARHELLA VHU 6602             7   2  1    46       GAMES LIBRARY (340)
-DIANE MACK 6435               5   5  0    42       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
 DOMINO JOE 6562               8   8  1    40       GAMES LIBRARY (340)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-JEFF DUNKLE 6391              6   9  0    34       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-NO BALCONY? 6549              2   0  0    31       STL RAD (602)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PANACHE 6540                  2   0  0    22       COOL WORDS (601)
-FINCH'S ART 6551              1   1  0    22       STL RAD (602)
 THE 6543                      1   0  0    20       COOL WORDS (601)
 JUXTAPOSE 6539                1   0  1    14       COOL WORDS (601)
-RAY MORAN 6436                1   9  0    13       AMERICAN APPRAISAL (559)
-WENDEL 4745                   1   0  0     9       WIND STORM (423)
-ANDY SISCO 6465               1   2  0     5       BOMBAY BUMBLE BEES (308)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
CONVICTED THIEF 605    0  1 0   1                   JUXTAPOSE 6539        550 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Where I come from, such Dangerous Criminals would not be given this chance to prey
upon the public!  They would be executed out of hand.  Their heads would be mounted
on stakes at the city's gate.  Not CODDLED and given respectable careers!  It's a
disgrace, and no wonder that this Osksian Empire is in decline. -- Shara Khor

     Coddled criminals' heads?  What an odd picture that makes. -- Ed.

You see one Fratsfa Slave, you've seen them all, and they're all worthless. -- Yatzee

Much as it pains me to agree with that oaf, Yatzee, there is some truth in his
assertion. -- Tarhella Vhu

Captured Orcs are fun.  They are so EASY to fool.  You can win anything off them. --
Domino Joe

24 March 2006
A few notes about e-mailed personals:

You may submit personal ads, columns, spotlights, etc. electronically, either via e-
mail to ads at reality dot com (which doesn't need any more spam, thank you) or on
the web at http://www.reality.com/duel2/modules.php?name=Ads.  When you submit
something, you should get back a receipt from HAL at RSI.  If you do NOT get a
receipt, your ads may have gone astray (not all e-mail makes it to its destination
any more than all snail mail does).  If you DO get a receipt, it should, in the body
of the message, tell you what arena your stuff was filed in.  Check your receipt to
make sure your submission made it to the intended destination.  Also check to see
that everything you sent made it to the same place.  Sometimes HAL, who is rather
simple-minded in some ways, will send half your stuff to another arena if the name
or number of that arena shows up at the beginning of a line.  So if the word Ti
appears at the beginning of a line halfway through your ads, all the ads after that
may end up in Ti, which is closed and doesn't need ads.  As a side note, sometimes
things move slowly, so don't wait until the last minute to send your ads and all.
If they get held up along the way, they may not show up until next turn.  Happy
writing! -- Ed.

28 March 2006
We of the Desolate Empire Alliance want to welcome two managers to our fold.  Kon of
the Empire Rising, and Osiris!  May they be blessed with the blood of their enemies,
and give no quarter in War! -- Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

HEARTS was devastated by FLAGPOLE PANTIES in a 1 minute mismatched Title fight.
HAPPY APPLE vanquished KHALHUMS DWARF in a exciting 1 minute gory uneven battle.
OTIS slimly lost to KUNG-FU MASTER in a crowd pleasing 2 minute brawl.
OTIS overpowered VENOMOUS CONCUBINE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided fight.
ETERNAL D.J. vanquished DOMINO JOE in a 1 minute brutal mismatched fight.
YATZEE devastated CAPTURED ORC in a 1 minute gruesome one-sided competition.
SHARAN KHOR vanquished THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a action packed 1 minute uneven duel.
TARHELLA VHU viciously subdued CAPTURED ORC in a 1 minute gory duel.
PANACHE overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute uneven match.
JUXTAPOSE executed CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
THE demolished EMBEZZLING SCRIBE in a 1 minute mismatched competition.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         PARRY-LUNGE       10 -   1 -  0      91  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         PARRY-STRIKE       3 -   2 -  0      60  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         PARRY-RIPOSTE      6 -   4 -  2      60  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         WALL OF STEEL     19 -  14 -  2      58  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         LUNGING ATTACK    21 -  16 -  2      57  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         TOTAL PARRY        6 -   5 -  0      55  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         SLASHING ATTACK    8 -   7 -  1      53  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         AIMED BLOW         5 -   5 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         STRIKING ATTACK    9 -   9 -  0      50  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      0         BASHING ATTACK    13 -  20 -  0      39  |

Turn 550 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  2         2  WALL OF STEEL  
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         2  STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  0     TOTAL PARRY        0 -  0         2  BASHING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  0                                       2  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  1                                       1  PARRY-LUNGE    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    FLAGPOLE PANTIES 5968      10   4  1  106 FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
STRIKING ATTACK  HAPPY APPLE 6492           11   7  2  101 FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
BASHING ATTACK   OTIS 6589                   7   4  0   87 FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
LUNGING ATTACK   OTIS 6501                  11   7  2   73 FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
PARRY-LUNGE      ETERNAL D.J. 5931          14   7  0   71 FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (253)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    YATZEE 6568                 9   7  2   58 GAMES LIBRARY (340)
SLASHING ATTACK  TARHELLA VHU 6602           7   2  1   46 GAMES LIBRARY (340)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is OTIS 6501.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
HAPPY APPLE 6492.  The ten other most popular fighters were OTIS 6501, OTIS 6589, 
SHARAN KHOR 6561, ETERNAL D.J. 5931, YATZEE 6568, TARHELLA VHU 6602, PANACHE 6540, 
THE 6543, FLAGPOLE PANTIES 5968, and JUXTAPOSE 6539.

The least popular fighter this week was DOMINO JOE 6562.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were HEARTS 6485, JUXTAPOSE 6539, FLAGPOLE PANTIES 5968, THE 6543, PANACHE 
6540, TARHELLA VHU 6602, YATZEE 6568, ETERNAL D.J. 5931, SHARAN KHOR 6561, and OTIS 
6589.