Date   : 08/07/2007    Duedate: 08/20/2007


DM-4    TURN-581

This Weeks Top Honors


(4-6289) [27-20-1,110]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

HOWARD                         J.A. PINKERTON
DOGS OF WAR (115)              THE WALL (367)
(4-6289) [27-20-1,110]         (4-6384) [7-0-0,97]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

HOWARD                         J.A. PINKERTON
DOGS OF WAR (115)              THE WALL (367)
(4-6289) [27-20-1,110]         (4-6384) [7-0-0,97]


THE WALL (367)

Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. THE WALL (367)              61
2. DOGS OF WAR (115)           33      TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
3. TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)     20      Unchartered Team
4. F BALLS (523)                0
5. BABY BROTHERS (510)          0      THE WALL (367)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 1*BABY BROTHERS (510)        8   1  0 88.9   1/ 1*THE WALL (367)            9  4 0
 2/ 2*THE WALL (367)            26  11  0 70.3   2/ 2 TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)   8  7 1
 3/ 3 TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)  116  81 10 58.9   3/ 3 DOGS OF WAR (115)         7  8 1
 4- 4 F BALLS (523)            108  88  8 55.1   4- 4 F BALLS (523)             3  0 0
 5/ 6 DOGS OF WAR (115)        448 659 26 40.5   5- 5*BABY BROTHERS (510)       2  0 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *


     Merkava sat with his back against the crypt door, the rough stone harsh against
his healing back.  If everyone gave a pound of flesh for their addictions, he was
paid in full.  A chittering noise in the recesses of the crypt distracted him from
his pain for a few moments.  The sputtering flames of the two torches in the anteroom
barely lighted the space where he sat and gave no hint of what moved beyond that
     _Probably just your imagination, Merk._  The thought didn't help though.  The
smell of rotting flesh permeated the air, made heavier in the sweltering heat of the
recent weeks, and reminded him that not everyone met their fate at The Post.
Normally the sickly-sweet aroma soothed him, but tonight his mind raced at the
implications of Master Beru's words.
     The last lashes landed in time for him to be unbound to stand for evening 
reverie.  As the haunting tones of the horn tolled for those who would never see
another sun set, he forced himself to stand straight with his arms at his side.
Panther and EmWun held more of his weight than he cared to admit, but neither set of
eyes held anything but concern.  Master Beru saluted the sunset imperially, an
immovable boulder unconscious of the wretches of Leopard in the background.
     As the sun faded and the dim light of twilight warned of impending gloom, Master
Beru snapped his salute down and executed a sharp turn to face Merkava and his
guards.  The man's unfathomable eyes burrowed into Merkava, sharp with accusation and
shame.  Merkava wanted nothing more than to be out of the man's sight.  Knowing his
own disgrace had been discovered was one thing but knowing that Master Beru was
ashamed of him....  _Well, a man has his limits_
     "Merkava, you have faced your twenty and one lashes.  Let all who stood witness
today stand prepared for the day when this charge is raised again.  I will not
tolerate drugs and mystic hallucinogens.  Alcohol should be enough for anyone.  If
not....  Well, everyone gets one warning.  There is no second warning."
     His wizened features hardened and his eyes locked onto Merkava's.
     "Merkava, if you are found guilty of use controlled substances again, I will
personally skin you alive and throw you into the Dark Arena with a spoon.  Do we
understand each other?"
     Merkava nodded his head, his voice raw from the anguished screams.  Master
Beru's eyebrow raised slightly.  The warning needed no further explanation.  The
Master demanded a response.
     "Yes, sir."  The words sounded meek.  His voice cracked as he said sir, allowing
a sob to escape.
     Everyone filed out of the courtyard silently.  Merkava felt Master Beru's hand
on his shoulder.  How could he miss the exquisite lance of agony that drove from his
shoulder through the rest of his body?
     "Merkava, look at me."
     Raising his eyes, Merkava looked at his mentor and leader.  Concern was plain in
his eyes.  Concern and...pity.
     "I will do what I have to do.  If that means taking your gift, I will do it.  Do
you understand me?  You are starting to show the arena what you can do.  Don't make
me have to throw your chance away."

     His eyes still haunted Merkava.  The sounds of stone scraping across stone
brought him back to the here and now.  Light flooded the antechamber from one of the
sarcophagi.  It was Grant's tomb.  A figure stepped into the antechamber.  As his
eyes adjusted to the new light, he felt a hand take his.
     "Come brother.  You have been through much.  Let us show you how you can
have your vengeance...."

To be continued....

               + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Web of Death ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

     It was cold.  That seemed wrong.  Surely he was dead, and if so, he shouldn't be
feeling anything.  Unless...Challon had never fully believed in any of the more
dramatic versions of an afterlife that his fellow gladiators talked about sometimes.
He'd always figured on one of three options:  nothing at all, reincarnation, or a
sort of nothing-limbo.  So...maybe he wasn't dead after all?  But there wasn't any
pain, and he knew, he remembered with "painful" clarity, that he'd been hurt in the
arena.  Ah...drugs?  He was in the Infirmary and heavily drugged?  Not a pleasant
thought, there'd been strange stories about what went on in the Infirmary.
Especially in what they called "intensive care."
      "You are awake."
      The voice was deep and had some strange undertones that Challon did not want to
think about.  Undertones that suggested maybe he WAS dead after all.  But some
response was called for.  He willed his eyes to open.  Somewhat to his surprise, they
did.  A ceiling of shadowy stones cunningly fitted together to form arches and ribs
and, he closed his eyes again, demonic faces.
      "You are awake," the voice repeated.
      "I'm dead."
      "Perhaps.  Or not, if you make yourself useful.  To live again...is a privilege
you have a chance to earn."
      Challon opened his eyes again.  One of the demonic faces floated closer through
the darkness.  The shadows on it shifted.  He had seen this face before.  "Nestor
      "Yes."  The Dark Champion smiled, but it was the smile of a demon, not a human.
Well, Challon had always heard that Nestor Bane was actually a demon.
      So many questions, which to ask?  "Can you do that?"
      "Not normally.  But a certain...entity has asked a favor of me.  This would be
part of the payment for the favor, if all goes well."
      "But favors aren't paid for--"
      "Exchanged, then."
      "What do I have to do?"
      "Decide whether you will seek a return to life, or embrace the death that is on
you now."
      "No, I mean--"
      "I know what you mean," the demon said.  "As with all mortals, you must choose
blindly.  Life or death."
      He could ask this demon about the true nature of the afterlife--  No, he
probably couldn't.  Blind choices.  Not really a choice at all.  Better the demon you
know than the one you don't?  "Life."

                                      SPY REPORT

     Hail and well met warriors of JHELUM!  Know me for who I am, Zontani Sharp Eyes, 
Spymaster extraordinaire of all Alastari.  Due to his absence and inability to defend 
the throne, DIAPERED ZALGOR has lost the title of Duelmaster.  This time victory fell 
to the grasp of the usurper.  All hail HOWARD, Duelmaster of JHELUM!  Heed this!  A 
seer has warned that if exactly 6 die in duels this week, the whole city shall 
perish!  Just remember...5 or 7!   
     But come now, let us look deeper into the maze of contention and crossed blades 
that is city JHELUM.  I saw one fighter that warriors avoided when this week's 
challenge seeking began.  THE WALL is feared.  This much I can say.  Apparently the 
stalwarts of TANKS FOR NOTHIN' are catching the bulk of jests down at the challenging 
board for their large share of the avoids.  Mighty fighters cannot but expect 
competition from those below.  HANNIBAL take warning!  You have more than a few 
enemies in JHELUM.  At the gambling halls I have started to bet money on MERKAVA.  He 
has got the courage it takes.  Witness his challenge this turn against HANNIBAL!  The 
TANKS FOR NOTHIN' stable will be up late tonight, for indeed it was MERKAVA who 
claimed victory in the contest, ascending 23 in recognition!  I can not but mention 
with disdain the name of PANTHER who this week posted a challenge to a warrior a full 
9 points below in the rankings.  I thought PANTHER showed great skill and promise 
when she was defeated by J.A. PINKERTON.  All right, so I slept through it!  Big 
     Vendettas.  Bloodied blades and broken spears.  Indeed the city has seen more 
than its fair share of red in recent times.  Fate is a fickle mistress.  She showers 
the miserable with fortune but sets enemies against the victorious.  Remember this!   
     The girls are as pretty in JHELUM as ever I remembered them....and the fighters 
as ugly!  Don't let your reputation slip!  Ahh, but I can hear the spires of a far 
off city calling to me.  I must away!  Till next we meet remember - the pen is 
mightier than the sword, but a maul is a different story!-- Zontani Sharp Eyes  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HOWARD 6289                  27  20  1   110       DOGS OF WAR (115)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-FOOT BALL 6305               18   1  1   216       F BALLS (523)
-DIAPERED ZALGOR 5367          8   1  0   122       BABY BROTHERS (510)
 LEOPARD 6363                 13   3  0   100       TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
 J.A. PINKERTON 6384           7   0  0    97       THE WALL (367)
 M1A1 2734                    16   8  1    95       TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HANNIBAL 5715                18  30  1    85       DOGS OF WAR (115)
 MERKAVA 1839                 12  18  1    81       TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
 PANTHER 3554                 14   4  0    79       TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
 MIA2 3553                    13   6  2    69       TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TEACHER 3940                  8   0  0    38       THE WALL (367)
 THE JUDGE 3939                7   1  0    38       THE WALL (367)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-FOOS BALL 6366                2   0  0    32       F BALLS (523)
 PETE MASTIFF 6387             3   1  0    30       DOGS OF WAR (115)
 THE PROSTITUTE 3938           1   7  0    24       THE WALL (367)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CHALLOST 6394                 1   0  1    16       DOGS OF WAR (115)
 LEONIDAS 6382                 3   5  0    14       DOGS OF WAR (115)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
PERSISTENT BEGGAR 584  0  1 0   1                   CHALLOST 6394         581 NONE    
CHALLON 6304          11 28 0 DOGS OF WAR 115       MIA2 3553             580         
FLOYD PINK 3936        3  1 0 THE WALL 367          RIPPIN 6354           577 REVENGED

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Challon and friends -- I stand ready.  Bring on your best. -- MIA2

Hannibal -- Do I qualify for mountain duty? -- EmWun

Kung-Fu Master --  'Master'?  I beat a master?  Hmm....  Something seems wrong with
this. -- Leopard

Diapered Zalgor -- What is a Zalgor?  And why do you need a diaper?  I'm confused. --

Convicted Assassin -- The conviction is the least of my concerns.  If you fight like
that, you need to find another line of work.  Jeesh, that was sad. -- Panther

J.A. Pinkerton -- For the record, the boss already found my stash.  We don't need no
Pinkerton's around here. -- Merkava

Diapered Zalbor -- Ridiculous flesh person that you are, you deserve to be Duelmaster
and to be forced to write a column.  Not that I think you will.  No respect, you
youngsters.  I don't think you truly value what you have.  Besides which, you're
probably an ingrate and a tourney warrior! -- Howard

M1a1 -- Here, maybe, but what can you do on a narrow mountain path, in the snow, that
an elephant can't do equally badly? -- Hannibal

M1s2 -- Damn.  I knew it was a bad idea to make something "bigger and better."  Not
that you aren't a sight to excite.  But still, your team name says it all:  Tanks for
nothin'. -- Ghost of Challon

The Prostitute -- What part of "no, thank you" didn't you understand? -- Leonidas

The Judge -- I WILL bite you, see if I don't!  In an alley, if I have to.  And then
I'm going to find the local Commissioner and bite HIM until he shakes the toner
cartridge.  This is unreasonable. -- Pete Mastiff

9 July 2007
I have not been receiving my physical turns in a reliable manner lately.  If there
are diplos with the turns that go missing, they're gone for good.  So if you send me
a diplo and do not see an acknowledgement of receipt in the personals, know that I
have not gotten it (yet).  If you have email, contact me at Livia AT reality DOT com.
If you don't have email, keep trying with the diplos.  We are working on this
problem. -- the Scribe/Jorja/Leeta
P.S.  If you email me, put "Re DM" on the subject line.

27 July 2007
                        **  STORMCROWE SLAUGHTERHOUSE II   **

Years have passed since the last Slaughterhouse, but the season is right for a return


*The actions begins TURN-263 (due approximately November 27, 2007)




*13 Turns (Turns 263-275)


*Teams will consist of two (2) managers.  No more, no less.  Only one team allowed
per manager.  Violators will be disqualified from the competition.  Old teams and new
teams are welcome to join the competition.  Once the contest has begun (TURN 263)
managers MAY NOT exchange teams or partners.


In the tradition of the Slaughterhouse, scoring will be simple and straight-forward.
Victory and achievements will be rewarded while defeats will be mocked and ridiculed.

+3 Win
+2 Kill (in addition to +3 Win for a total of +5)
+5 Team on the Move (Top Gainer(s) Only)
+3 Turn's Most Popular
+3 Turn's Least Popular
+5 Current Top Team (begins 3rd turn of contest)


*Fights against teammates garner NO POINTS.

*Fights against Judith's team (Northern Lights), Arena Stand Bys and the Dark Arena
garner NO POINTS (this includes DA kills).

*Tourney participation is allowed (even encouraged), but NO POINTS will be given for
success in those endeavors.

*NO POINTS will be awarded for DM, Popularity Leader, Chartered Recognition Leader,
Top Chartered Team, Stylemasters, Top Unchartered Team, and Unchartered Recognition
Leader.  Every effort has been made to insure scoring neither benefits established
teams nor new teams.


Entry into the Stormcrowe Slaughterhouse is easy:

*Find a Partner

*Declare your intentions in the Stormcrowe newsletter to enter before the first turn
of the contest.  You may also email or diplo Master Darque.

*Each manager entering the Stormcrowe Slaughterhouse must submit one (1) Team Roll-Up
Certificate.  Only certificates will be accepted for entry.  All certificates
submitted will be used during the course of the contest as prizes.


*ENDURANCE AWARD:  One (1) +1 Bonus Potion will be given to every team that competes
in 60 of the 65 contest fights.

*KILL MASTER AWARD:  The individual manager with the most kills will receive a
Limited Immortality Potion.  This potion may be applied to one (1) warrior.  He/she
will be resurrected ONE-TIME if they are killed in Basic D2.

*TOP TEAM AWARD:  Each manager on the winning team will receive the following prize
pack for their Slaughterhouse Dominance:

*One (1) +1 Bonus Potion
*Favorites Knowledge for one (1) Warrior
*Undisclosed amount of Team RU Certificates

Special note from RSI on prizes:  All contest prizes must be used within three
months.  All contest prizes may only be used on a living warrior on the participating
contest team in DM 45.  The immortality potion may resurrect a warrior one time,
after a death in DM 45 only, after which time the potion disappears.


In the unlikely event of a tie, pre-contest established tie-breakers will be
consulted to determine a winner.  The tie-breaking criteria are known to the
Moderator and RSI.  They will not be made public knowledge to avoid any exploitation.


Master Darque will be serving as Master of Ceremonies for the Slaughterhouse II.  As
such, all his decisions are final.  Any rules inquiries should be directed to him.


Master Darque can be reached by Diplo in DM 45 (Darque Forces-428) or you may email
him at the following address:  rebelnerfherder at yahoo dot com.  Be sure to put
STORMCROWE in the Subject line of your Email so it can be easily spotted if sent to
his Spam folder.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

M1A1 was viciously subdued by HOWARD in a 2 minute master's Challenge Title fight.
PANTHER was subdued by J.A. PINKERTON in a exciting 4 minute Challenge melee.
MERKAVA overpowered HANNIBAL in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge duel.
LEOPARD bested VETERAN MERCENARY in a popular 1 minute brutal fight.
MIA2 devastated THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a 1 minute gory uneven brawl.
TEACHER outwaited CAPTURED ORC in a crowd pleasing 7 minute match.
THE JUDGE slimly won victory over THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a dull 14 minute fight.
THE PROSTITUTE vanquished LEONIDAS in a 1 minute uneven duel.
PETE MASTIFF vanquished EMBEZZLING SCRIBE in a 1 minute uneven fight.
CHALLOST slaughtered PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 1 minute brutal one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         SLASHING ATTACK   15 -   4 -  2      79  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   3         TOTAL PARRY       22 -  11 -  0      67  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         LUNGING ATTACK    14 -   7 -  1      67  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         WALL OF STEEL     14 -   8 -  1      64  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         STRIKING ATTACK   20 -  15 -  0      57  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         AIMED BLOW         5 -   4 -  0      56  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         BASHING ATTACK     3 -   3 -  0      50  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         PARRY-LUNGE        5 -   6 -  0      45  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      4 -  13 -  1      24  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   0         PARRY-STRIKE       1 -   6 -  1      14  |

Turn 581 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         2  STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  WALL OF STEEL  
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  1     BASHING ATTACK     0 -  0         2  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  1                                       1  PARRY-LUNGE    
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  1                                       1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
                                                                1  SLASHING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-LUNGE      HOWARD 6289                27  20  1  110 DOGS OF WAR (115)
LUNGING ATTACK   LEOPARD 6363               13   3  0  100 TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
STRIKING ATTACK  J.A. PINKERTON 6384         7   0  0   97 THE WALL (367)
WALL OF STEEL    M1A1 2734                  16   8  1   95 TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
TOTAL PARRY      PANTHER 3554               14   4  0   79 TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
SLASHING ATTACK  MIA2 3553                  13   6  2   69 TANKS FOR NOTHIN' (171)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is HOWARD 6289.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
J.A. PINKERTON 6384.  The ten other most popular fighters were HOWARD 6289, LEOPARD 
6363, MIA2 3553, MERKAVA 1839, THE PROSTITUTE 3938, PETE MASTIFF 6387, CHALLOST 6394, 
M1A1 2734, HANNIBAL 5715, and PANTHER 3554.

The least popular fighter this week was THE JUDGE 3939.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were LEONIDAS 6382, TEACHER 3940, PANTHER 3554, HANNIBAL 5715, M1A1 2734,