Date   : 01/09/2007    Duedate: 01/22/2007


DM-5    TURN-565

This Weeks Top Honors


(5-4394) [13-2-0,110]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

SUSHIE                         OVERKILL
PAPER MARIO (457)              TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
(5-4394) [13-2-0,110]          (5-4882) [1-0-0,21]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

SPORTS GREATS (496)            SPORTS GREATS (496)
(5-4715) [13-3-0,99]           (5-4715) [13-3-0,99]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)      60
2. PAPER MARIO (457)           38      PAPER MARIO (457)
3. THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)      16      Unchartered Team
4. SPORTS GREATS (496)         13
                                       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)     4   1  0 80.0   1/ 1 PAPER MARIO (457)         9  3 0
 2/ 1 PAPER MARIO (457)         49  15  1 76.6   2/ 3 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)    8  7 0
 3/ 2 SPORTS GREATS (496)       31  27  4 53.4   3/ 2 SPORTS GREATS (496)       5  3 0
 4/ 3 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)   307 327 13 48.4   4/ 0*TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)    4  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

               + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ A Fishy Tale ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

     Orverd Quill stared at his fortune cookie.  "There's a paper in this cookie," he
said.  "It's got writing on it.  Do you figure it's part of the recipe that fell in
while the cooks were baking, and we should take it back to them so they can make more
fortune cookies?"
     Elinde Goss patted him on the elbow, being too short to reach his shoulder.
"No, I think it's supposed to be there, Orv.  It's your fortune.  Break it open and
let's find out what it says."
     "There are cooks who know about my fortune?"
     "I don't think so, Orv.  Probably there's a magician who does the fortunes for
     "Oh."  He broke the cookie and squinted at the slip of paper.  "It says...I will
live in interesting times."  The gladiator blinked a couple of times.  "Okay.
That'll probably be fun.  Maybe I can catch the Grandfather fish off the end of the
     "You and your dumb Grandfather fish," Fergus Hill muttered, coming up behind the
two.  "I don't think there IS such a fish in the bay."
     Orverd brightened immediately.  "You're just jealous," he said, grinning.  "YOU
can't catch so much as an old boot."
     "Why would I want to catch a boot?"  Fergus looked down at his feet, shod in
sandals with hobnailed soles.  "I don't wear boots.  It's against nature to close in
your feet--"
     "We've heard that rant before, Fergus," Elinde said quickly.  "How about if we
skip it today?  And, by the way, what brought you out here?"  She swept a hand around
to indicate the Middle Way's run-down guildhouse, the yard full of neatly stacked
salvage from buildings coming down anywhere on the island and beach gleanings (the
Middle Way did a steady business in scrap lumber and miscellaneous bits and pieces),
and the rickety dock with its stable of rowboats.
     "Came for a boat," Fergus said.  "Word is there's something in the water off the
Whistling Rock, but nobody wants to risk the currents there to find out what.  So I
thought I'd go."  This was not as crazy as it sounded.  Because the Middle Way spent
so much time going after salvage, they were all good in tricky water, and Fergus was
arguably the best.
     Both his teammates looked interested.  "Want some help?" Orverd asked.
     Fergus looked at the water in the bay, which was restless with a coming storm,
then squinted at the sky where clouds were assembling rapidly.  And it was already
afternoon; this would have to be done quickly if he wanted to be back on land by
dark, which he did want.  Having an extra pair of oars in the water wouldn't hurt.
"Sure.  Let's go."

                                      SPY REPORT

     If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of 
KALTOS brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too.  KALTOS saw the first turn for TEAM 
CHAOS ELITE, a 4-1-0, and some teams are scared, others are too arrogant to notice.  
Take note friends, take note.  Of course, we're all terribly impressed to see 
OVERKILL win a fight and gain 21 points, terribly.  SUSHIE challenged KALTOS' 
Duelmaster for a shot at the throne.  And it's out with the old, in with the new, as 
SUSHIE takes the Title and last week's bar tab from the old Duelmaster.  Heh, heh.  
I'm not in a very good mood today, but why am I telling you this?  You want to know 
what's new, don't you, KALTOS?   
     He who fights and runs away will live to fight another day, the coward.  What's 
the big D?  THE MIDDLE WAY 5 was the most avoided team?  Bunch of lily livered... 
grumble... mumble... curse...  And it looks like PAPER MARIO avoided them the most 
this turn.  What a pack of would be losers, if you ask me.  Hmph.  FERGUS HILL was 
challenged more times this turn than the Duelmaster.  Now was the DM insulted or 
feared?  Heh, heh.  Now here's guts and stupidity all rolled into one, PELE 
challenged up 27 to take on FERGUS HILL of THE MIDDLE WAY 5.  My sides still hurt 
from laughing about FERGUS HILL losing and giving PELE 26 points of recognition.  Ha 
ha ha ha!!   
     Death and Taxes.  The less death I see, the more it taxes my patience.  Let's 
see if anyone's dead or dying.  We're all going to die in the end, so why worry if 
the fate catches up with you sooner that later?   
     I was about to buy a new quill pen the other day, but some fighter took it for 
an epee.  Forgive me for writing with a dagger.  Phlllt!  Just had to do that before 
I leave the fine city of KALTOS.  I feel much better now.  I see the crowds are 
getting restless, I must leave now-- Snide Clemens  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SUSHIE 4394                  13   2  0   110       PAPER MARIO (457)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MICKEY MANTLE 4715           13   3  0    99       SPORTS GREATS (496)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PELE 4847                     5   0  0    86       SPORTS GREATS (496)
 STAR ROD 4391                11   4  0    77       PAPER MARIO (457)
 TWINK 4396                   10   5  1    68       PAPER MARIO (457)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FERGUS HILL 4805             15  14  0    64       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
 BOMBETTE 4399                12   2  0    59       PAPER MARIO (457)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JERI LOUGH 4840               4  15  0    45       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
-TUBBA BLUBBA 4395             3   2  0    45       PAPER MARIO (457)
 ORVERD QUILL 4834             8  11  1    43       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
 HELENE JUSTE 4875             3   1  0    43       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
 ELINDE GOSS 4841              7  11  0    36       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-GRETZKY 4873                  2   1  0    22       SPORTS GREATS (496)
 OVERKILL 4882                 1   0  0    21       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
 WRATHCHILD 4881               1   0  0    15       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
 IRON MAIDEN 4880              1   0  0    13       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
 GODSMACK 4879                 1   0  0    10       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
 MOON CHILD 4878               0   1  0     1       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Mickey Mantle -- There you go smashing my self-esteem by taking me to the seats!  You
are just a big Yankee Doodle Dandy. -- Sushie

Fergus Hill -- You are a meanie, meanie, meanie! -- Twink

Jeri and Overd -- Thanks for the memories. -- Star Rod and Bombette

Ouch!  A 2-2!  Not Paper Mario quality.  Not! -- Luigi

Gretzky -- I like to see an energetic man, yes, I do.  Especially when he trips and
falls on his face, or, of course, another part of his anatomy.  Maybe you need wind
sprints? -- Elinde Goss

Twink -- Too bad you're a golem, you'd be more fun if you were a woman.  Of course,
it is kinda fun using you as a giant tiddlywink.... -- Fergus Hill

Star Rod -- You know, if you could emit light from that thing on the top of your
head, it might be really useful in getting around at night.  How do you feel about
small boats? -- Jeri Lough
P.S.  But what about water?  Would you, ah, "short-circuit" if you got wet?

Bombette -- Oh, chick, I'm sorry, okay?  I figured I'd be done in time to take you to
dinner tonight, but something came up.  How about a rain check? -- Orverd Quill
P.S.  If it's something really cool, I'll...no, I can't cut you in on it unless
Fergus okays it.  He's got first disposal on this one, if it's anything interesting.
Well, I tell you what, *I* will find some cool salvage for you!  How's that for an

The Persistent Beggar is a fool, but then, we knew that. -- Helene Juste

Star Rod -- Hey, you think THAT is mean?  You should see me when I'm annoyed. --
Fergus Hill

Star Rod -- (sadly)  Yeah.  But we won't be there till March. -- Elinde
P.S.  The boss says you shouldn't have moved away from Show Me Central, which is
where WE are now.

Star Rod -- Well, more of a default strategy.  It is better than 1-1-1 HE HE, but
only just. -- Jeri Lough

18 December 2006
Let it be known that Buddy Lee is no longer a member of The Company of Brothers,
T.C.B.  I have resigned as of 10-23-06.  Thank you.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

SUSHIE unbelievably bested MICKEY MANTLE in a 5 minute master's Challenge Title fight.
PELE handily defeated FERGUS HILL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
BOMBETTE won victory over JERI LOUGH in a crowd pleasing 3 minute brawl.
STAR ROD outlasted KHALHUMS DWARF in a unpopular 7 minute veteran's fight.
TWINK devastated THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
HELENE JUSTE devastated AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 1 minute bloody mismatched match.
ELINDE GOSS overpowered OSKSI NOBLE in a 1 minute uneven melee.
ORVERD QUILL viciously subdued CAPTURED ORC in a 2 minute expert vs. novice duel.
MOON CHILD was vanquished by EMBEZZLING SCRIBE in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
GODSMACK beat PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 2 minute novice's melee.
IRON MAIDEN overpowered MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided match.
WRATHCHILD devastated PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 2 minute mismatched conflict.
OVERKILL demolished EMBEZZLING SCRIBE in a 1 minute mismatched match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         BASHING ATTACK     1 -   0 -  0     100  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         AIMED BLOW         4 -   1 -  0      80  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      2         TOTAL PARRY       15 -   5 -  0      75  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         STRIKING ATTACK    5 -   3 -  0      63  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         WALL OF STEEL     13 -  10 -  0      57  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         LUNGING ATTACK    23 -  21 -  1      52  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         SLASHING ATTACK    2 -   3 -  0      40  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      3 -   7 -  0      30  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-LUNGE        0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 565 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         1 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         5  LUNGING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         2  TOTAL PARRY    
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         1  WALL OF STEEL  
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  0                                       1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
WALL OF STEEL      2 -  0                                       1  AIMED BLOW     
SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  1                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  2     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    SUSHIE 4394                13   2  0  110 PAPER MARIO (457)
LUNGING ATTACK   MICKEY MANTLE 4715         13   3  0   99 SPORTS GREATS (496)
TOTAL PARRY      STAR ROD 4391              11   4  0   77 PAPER MARIO (457)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    FERGUS HILL 4805           15  14  0   64 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
STRIKING ATTACK  HELENE JUSTE 4875           3   1  0   43 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is MICKEY MANTLE 4715.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was MICKEY MANTLE 4715.  The ten other most popular fighters were JERI LOUGH 
4840, ORVERD QUILL 4834, SUSHIE 4394, PELE 4847, HELENE JUSTE 4875, OVERKILL 4882, 
TWINK 4396, ELINDE GOSS 4841, GODSMACK 4879, and IRON MAIDEN 4880.

The least popular fighter this week was STAR ROD 4391.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were MOON CHILD 4878, FERGUS HILL 4805, BOMBETTE 4399, WRATHCHILD 4881, IRON 
JUSTE 4875.