Date   : 08/21/2007    Duedate: 09/03/2007


DM-5    TURN-581

This Weeks Top Honors


(5-4875) [11-9-0,114]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

GRETZKY                        POSITION IS EMPTY
SPORTS GREATS (496)            
(5-4873) [12-3-0,119]          

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

JERI LOUGH                     HELENE JUSTE
THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)         THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
(5-4840) [11-24-0,93]          (5-4875) [11-9-0,114]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. SPORTS GREATS (496)         53
2. THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)      26      PAPER MARIO (457)
3. TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)       0      Unchartered Team
4. PAPER MARIO (457)          -40
                                       WOLF PACK II (422)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 PAPER MARIO (457)         86  34  2 71.7   1- 1 TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)    7  3 0
 2- 2 TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)    42  28  3 60.0   2/ 2 PAPER MARIO (457)         6  5 1
 3/ 3 SPORTS GREATS (496)       48  41  7 53.9   3/ 3 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)    6  9 0
 4/ 4 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)   348 366 13 48.7   4/ 4 SPORTS GREATS (496)       4  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Shucks, I cannot leave you all without telling you about me.  Bragging?
Perhaps.  But it is not meant to be.  Rather, let's term it educational for those who
wish to read.
     17(+3)-21-11-7(+2)-21(+3)-5(+1)-13(+2) TP
     21-6-0 record with 3 DM titles
     Awesome Endurance and Great damage ability
     Ratings - only an adex parry
     Learned 0.93 skills per fight
     Used the BA @ 0/19/2 (didn't like to swing much)
I am off to retirement.  Wish me well.
          Star Rod

                                      SPY REPORT

     Hail KALTOS!  Warriors of the arena, prepare to be praised and blamed for your 
deeds.  It seems the training can make the difference, as TEAM CHAOS ELITE is pushed 
out of top team by PAPER MARIO, who came from 2nd with a 0-4-0 this turn.  The SPORTS 
GREATS guild has had a 3-0-0 turn and deserves to be watched in the future.  You 
never know where this kind of thing can lead.  And let's see, ALI fought TINY TOES 
and gained 21 points and contributed to SPORTS GREATS' 3-0-0.  CLANK has lost to 
WOODS, falling 17 points, while helping make PAPER MARIO a 0-4-0 turn.  We should ask 
HELENE JUSTE about the thrill of victory, and what being the new Duelmaster does for 
a warrior, she's now the one to ask.  By the way, was that our Duelmaster that I saw 
last night, cramped under the table at The Victory Tavern?   
     The crowd's roar, the smell of iron and leather, mixed with sweat, what more 
could a warrior ask of life?  Well, besides that.  THE MIDDLE WAY 5 has cause to 
stand tall, as they were KALTOS' most avoided team.  A smart manager knows this is a 
team to beat.  And guess who avoided THE MIDDLE WAY 5 stable the most?  Believe it or 
not, it was PAPER MARIO.  Anyone surprised?  The most challenged warrior this turn 
was PAPER MARIO's warrior BOMBETTE.  More fighters challenged her than challenged the 
     The Dark Arena is for those who cannot win, not who cannot lose with grace.  
Dignity in life or death is the warrior's creed.  We'd like to remind certain teams 
not to rob the graves of their enemies.  You know who you are; and it's considered 
     Remember, blood on the purple robe does not change it from a purple robe.  Dare 
to fight bravely.  Well, I'm burning daylight here in KALTOS and I've a long road 
ahead of me.  Happy Trails.  Until you see my quill in KALTOS again, farewell-- 
Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HELENE JUSTE 4875            11   9  0   114       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GRETZKY 4873                 12   3  0   119       SPORTS GREATS (496)
 BOMBETTE 4399                22   8  0    97       PAPER MARIO (457)
 JERI LOUGH 4840              11  24  0    93       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ORVERD QUILL 4834            17  18  1    90       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
-MOON CHILD 4878              10   4  0    81       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
 ELINDE GOSS 4841             14  20  0    73       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-IRON MAIDEN 4880              8   6  0    56       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
-WRATHCHILD 4881              10   4  0    51       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
-OVERKILL 4882                 8   6  2    47       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)
-TUBBA BLUBBA 4395             4   3  0    39       PAPER MARIO (457)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GERDIG IBBINS 4902            5   4  0    33       THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
 WOODS 4872                    1   1  0    33       SPORTS GREATS (496)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ALI 4910                      1   0  0    21       SPORTS GREATS (496)
 CLANK 4903                    4   2  0    14       PAPER MARIO (457)
-ALICE IN CHAINS 4904          1   2  0    10       TEAM CHAOS ELITE (509)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TINY TOES 4913                1   1  0     4       PAPER MARIO (457)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Let me outta here!  I want to go hunt treasure with Fergis.  He is such a hot guy! --

Helene -- Don't mind me if I take my frustrations out on you.  A gal needs an outlet,
don't you think? -- Bombette

Jeri -- I enjoyed our tussle.  You could have had me.  (wink) -- Star Rod

Elinde -- Well, I have a nicer nose that Pinocchio.  AND, I am a very nice golem. --
Twink (heading to Crysalis)

Alice -- I like you in chains.  It made things easier. -- Clank

Embezzling Scribe -- Thanks for the neat intro. -- Tiny Toes

Bombette -- Showing off for Fergus?  Do you actually think he'll notice? -- Helene
P.S.  He's rather imperceptive, you know, which is to say, he's a man.  I bet he
wouldn't notice if you died your hair green and gelled it to stand out straight like
a sea urchin's spines.

Star Rod -- I could hate you--easily!  But four skills and a rating...maybe I won't
hate you.  This is a good return for the loss. -- Jeri Lough

Iron Maiden -- Er, ah.  (drags his toe back and forth in the dust)  Um.  Would you
mind a lot if *I* was your secret admirer? -- Orverd Quill

Moon Child -- (grimly)  It's just a phase you're going through, right?  It will END.
With an eclipse if necessary. -- Elinde Goss

Wrathchild -- Huh.  Well, as Jeri so truly said (which is unusual and I will treasure
the memory always), four skills and a rating is not a bad return for losing. --
Gerdig Ibbins
P.S.  I suppose the deal is, we learn intensively now, and then spend a couple years
passing it on to a succession of hotshots.  Well, there are worse lives.

Luigi, Twink, and the Paper Marios -- It's true that I have never before seen the
Wurm Kin used to bait a fishhook.  What do you expect to catch with him?  A
leviathan, surely! -- Jorja

Bombette -- For you, maybe. -- Jeri

Our congratulations to Star Rod. -- Jorja and the Middle Way

27 July 2007
                        **  STORMCROWE SLAUGHTERHOUSE II   **

Years have passed since the last Slaughterhouse, but the season is right for a return


*The actions begins TURN-263 (due approximately November 27, 2007)




*13 Turns (Turns 263-275)


*Teams will consist of two (2) managers.  No more, no less.  Only one team allowed
per manager.  Violators will be disqualified from the competition.  Old teams and new
teams are welcome to join the competition.  Once the contest has begun (TURN 263)
managers MAY NOT exchange teams or partners.


In the tradition of the Slaughterhouse, scoring will be simple and straight-forward.
Victory and achievements will be rewarded while defeats will be mocked and ridiculed.

+3 Win
+2 Kill (in addition to +3 Win for a total of +5)
+5 Team on the Move (Top Gainer(s) Only)
+3 Turn's Most Popular
+3 Turn's Least Popular
+5 Current Top Team (begins 3rd turn of contest)


*Fights against teammates garner NO POINTS.

*Fights against Judith's team (Northern Lights), Arena Stand Bys and the Dark Arena
garner NO POINTS (this includes DA kills).

*Tourney participation is allowed (even encouraged), but NO POINTS will be given for
success in those endeavors.

*NO POINTS will be awarded for DM, Popularity Leader, Chartered Recognition Leader,
Top Chartered Team, Stylemasters, Top Unchartered Team, and Unchartered Recognition
Leader.  Every effort has been made to insure scoring neither benefits established
teams nor new teams.


Entry into the Stormcrowe Slaughterhouse is easy:

*Find a Partner

*Declare your intentions in the Stormcrowe newsletter to enter before the first turn
of the contest.  You may also email or diplo Master Darque.

*Each manager entering the Stormcrowe Slaughterhouse must submit one (1) Team Roll-Up
Certificate.  Only certificates will be accepted for entry.  All certificates
submitted will be used during the course of the contest as prizes.


*ENDURANCE AWARD:  One (1) +1 Bonus Potion will be given to every team that competes
in 60 of the 65 contest fights.

*KILL MASTER AWARD:  The individual manager with the most kills will receive a
Limited Immortality Potion.  This potion may be applied to one (1) warrior.  He/she
will be resurrected ONE-TIME if they are killed in Basic D2.

*TOP TEAM AWARD:  Each manager on the winning team will receive the following prize
pack for their Slaughterhouse Dominance:

*One (1) +1 Bonus Potion
*Favorites Knowledge for one (1) Warrior
*Undisclosed amount of Team RU Certificates

Special note from RSI on prizes:  All contest prizes must be used within three
months.  All contest prizes may only be used on a living warrior on the participating
contest team in DM 45.  The immortality potion may resurrect a warrior one time,
after a death in DM 45 only, after which time the potion disappears.


In the unlikely event of a tie, pre-contest established tie-breakers will be
consulted to determine a winner.  The tie-breaking criteria are known to the
Moderator and RSI.  They will not be made public knowledge to avoid any exploitation.


Master Darque will be serving as Master of Ceremonies for the Slaughterhouse II.  As
such, all his decisions are final.  Any rules inquiries should be directed to him.


Master Darque can be reached by Diplo in DM 45 (Darque Forces-428) or you may email
him at the following address:  rebelnerfherder at yahoo dot com.  Be sure to put
STORMCROWE in the Subject line of your Email so it can be easily spotted if sent to
his Spam folder.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

GRETZKY viciously subdued BOMBETTE in a 2 minute master's Challenge fight.
STAR ROD was viciously subdued by HELENE JUSTE in a 3 minute one-sided Title match.
ORVERD QUILL viciously subdued VETERAN MERCENARY in a 2 minute gory fight.
JERI LOUGH savagely defeated VENOMOUS CONCUBINE in a 2 minute master's competition.
ELINDE GOSS was narrowly defeated by KHALHUMS DWARF in a 3 minute veteran's struggle.
GERDIG IBBINS was defeated by CAPTURED ORC in a 2 minute gruesome melee.
CLANK was vanquished by WOODS in a 1 minute uneven duel.
TINY TOES was overpowered by ALI in a 1 minute uneven duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -   0 -  0     100  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         AIMED BLOW         7 -   2 -  0      78  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         TOTAL PARRY       12 -   5 -  0      71  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      2         STRIKING ATTACK   12 -   8 -  0      60  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         SLASHING ATTACK   15 -  13 -  0      54  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         LUNGING ATTACK    23 -  22 -  3      51  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         WALL OF STEEL      4 -   6 -  0      40  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         BASHING ATTACK     6 -   9 -  1      40  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-LUNGE        0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 581 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         3  SLASHING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         2  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
                              PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  AIMED BLOW     
                              BASHING ATTACK     0 -  2         1  TOTAL PARRY    
                              TOTAL PARRY        0 -  2         1  WALL OF STEEL  
                              WALL OF STEEL      0 -  1     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  HELENE JUSTE 4875          11   9  0  114 THE MIDDLE WAY 5 (453)
TOTAL PARRY      BOMBETTE 4399              22   8  0   97 PAPER MARIO (457)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is JERI LOUGH 4840.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was HELENE JUSTE 4875.  The ten other most popular fighters were GRETZKY 4873, ELINDE 
WOODS 4872, ALI 4910, CLANK 4903, and TINY TOES 4913.

The least popular fighter this week was TINY TOES 4913.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were CLANK 4903, ALI 4910, WOODS 4872, BOMBETTE 4399, GERDIG IBBINS 4902, 

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

STAR ROD (5-4391) PAPER MARIO (457)