DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 11/22/2005    Duedate: 12/05/2005

BONSUR ARENA

DM-7    TURN-537

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

TURTLEFACE
WASTELAND II (267)
(7-5734) [11-1-0,104]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

CLARITIN JUNKIE                POSITION IS EMPTY
WASTELAND II (267)             
(7-5735) [11-2-0,106]          

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

WAKKO                          DIKEMBE MUTUMBO
UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)        UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)
(7-3449) [12-18-0,54]          (7-3267) [19-20-1,85]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

WASTELAND II (267)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. WASTELAND II (267)          56
2. BEACH BABES (309)           50      WASTELAND II (267)
3. DOG SOLDIERS (481)           0      Unchartered Team
4. ESPANA (538)                 0
5. BRAIN (467)                -25      HOLY WAR (426)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 1 ESPANA (538)              43  26 12 62.3   1/ 1 WASTELAND II (267)        7  2 0
 2/ 3 WASTELAND II (267)       819 595 29 57.9   2/ 5 BEACH BABES (309)         6  9 0
 3/ 4 BRAIN (467)               18  15  0 54.5   3/ 2 UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)   5  9 0
 4/ 5 UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)   95  94  5 50.3   4- 4 ESPANA (538)              4  1 0
 5/ 6 BEACH BABES (309)        541 825 18 39.6   5/ 3 BRAIN (467)               3  1 0
 6- 7 DOG SOLDIERS (481)        15  24  2 38.5   6- 6 DOG SOLDIERS (481)        3  2 1

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings, Warriors of BONSUR.  Allow this humble servant Novgorodny Vir to give 
you a respite from the fights in the form of this Spyreport.  What's a move up by 3 
you ask?  (alright, maybe you didn't ask)  Cause for celebration, according to BEACH 
BABES.  WASTELAND II had cause to celebrate, after CLARITIN JUNKIE got 20 points by 
beating CAT-IN-THE-HAT.  A certain someone should cut down on the drinking and 
practice more, after losing 14 points to CLARITIN JUNKIE.  (Discrete enough, 
CAT-IN-THE-HAT?) What can be a greater victory?  TURTLEFACE has taken its place as 
the top, as BONSUR's new Duelmaster.  Word has it one team in BONSUR is using 
psychics to predict wins.  They lead a charmed life!   
     And how sociable are BONSUR's warriors?  Come, let us see.  Perhaps the warriors 
of BRAIN should take up some hobbies, as they are the most avoided team...  As a 
woman of good breeding scorns the "warriors" of UNDER JOLLY ROGER, so did that sorry 
team shy from BRAIN Is it charming personality?  Conversational abilities?  Good oral 
hygiene?  Whatever it is, UMBRELLA MAN is the most challenged warrior.  As a 
confidence booster, DIKEMBE MUTUMBO challenged UMBRELLA MAN, down 26 points.  Do you 
also slay vicious rodents in your spare time, DIKEMBE MUTUMBO?  Yes, Virginia, 
sometimes the little guy wins, as UMBRELLA MAN proved, beating 26 point higher 
DIKEMBE MUTUMBO.   
     Is there life after death?  Pragmatics (and warriors) know there is death after 
life!  Questions are being raised about the disposing of severed body parts in the 
arena.  A certain tavern in BONSUR would I avoid!   
     Leave me now, you base fools!  Keep those sands bloody and the buzzards fat!  
BONSUR, I leave you now.  The Duelmaster has agreed to foot my bill at The Dripping 
Blade.  'Til next time-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TURTLEFACE 5734              11   1  0   104       WASTELAND II (267)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DON CORLEON 5726             10   4  3   115       ESPANA (538)
 CLARITIN JUNKIE 5735         11   2  0   106       WASTELAND II (267)
 UMBRELLA MAN 5600            14  36  0    93       BEACH BABES (309)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DIKEMBE MUTUMBO 3267         19  20  1    85       UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)
 CAT-IN-THE-HAT 3270          19  13  2    83       UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)
 LAGUNA LIL 5681              13  22  0    77       BEACH BABES (309)
 PINK NOSE 5764                7   0  0    74       WASTELAND II (267)
-MICRO MIRACLE 5236           11   8  0    71       WASTELAND II (267)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HARRY 4851                    6   6  0    60       BRAIN (467)
 SALTON SEAHORSE 5713         11  13  2    59       BEACH BABES (309)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WAKKO 3449                   12  18  0    54       UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)
-VIEJO VERDE 5724              9   5  2    51       ESPANA (538)
 BOMBA YEARN 5765              6   2  1    49       UNDER JOLLY ROGER (316)
-MOHONCITO 5722               10   4  3    43       ESPANA (538)
-VASQUEZ 5763                  5   3  1    35       ESPANA (538)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-PONY 5506                     4   2  0    33       DOG SOLDIERS (481)
 SANDY SHORE 5769              5   2  0    27       BEACH BABES (309)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-TUNTUN 5507                   4   2  0    22       DOG SOLDIERS (481)
-VALVERDE 5767                 2   2  1    22       ESPANA (538)
-NAKOR 5023                    4   3  1    20       DOG SOLDIERS (481)
 TOTAL DISASTER 1.0 5778       1   0  0    20       WASTELAND II (267)
 BEACH BETTY 5768              3   5  0    19       BEACH BABES (309)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
DR SEUSS 3269         19 18 1 UNDER JOLLY ROGER 316 DON CORLEON 5726      533 NOT REVE
USELESS 5776           0  2 0 UNDER JOLLY ROGER 316 NAKOR 5023            536         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Turtleface -- Ugh.  You just, like, stop my clock every time I get close to you.
Maybe you should go to Tricorus--okay, nobody really wants to go there--but you could
join the All Ugly team.  You'd be a natural. -- Laguna Lil

Pink Nose -- You need sunscreen.  Otherwise your nose will peel off. -- Salton
Seahorse

Cat-in-the-Hat -- Listen, I get so TIRED of cats with hats!  Take it OFF. -- Umbrella
Man

Cat-in-the-Hat -- Yeah, take it ALL off! -- the rest of the Beach Babes

Valverde -- And very unusual at this season, too.  Practically shocking. -- Beach
Betty
P.S.  Did you see that brilliant and masterful parry?  Too bad I only did the one.

Pony -- (with deep sympathy) -- Don't you hate it when someone tells you that you
have a face like a horse? -- Sandy Shore
P.S.  If it was me, I'd kick my manager.

Lord, or as it might be (but I shudder at the thought) Lady Protector Sweaty -- Queen Gemra remains adamant that there are no free lands or, she points out, free lunches to be had in Bonsur.  I seem to have missed the offer of a free lunch.  But it would 

5 November 2005
It is with a proud heart that I announce the newest member of the Desolate Empire
alliance.  Dok Sik will be known from here forth as Dark Knight Dok Sik, of the
Desolate Empire.  May he be blessed with victory and courage.  May his enemies' blood
flow freely! -- The Dark Knights Wasby and Toker

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DIKEMBE MUTUMBO was bested by UMBRELLA MAN in a 3 minute master's Challenge fight.
SWEATY was subdued by TURTLEFACE in a 2 minute veteran's Title melee.
CAT-IN-THE-HAT was overpowered by CLARITIN JUNKIE in a 1 minute mismatched duel.
PINK NOSE viciously subdued SALTON SEAHORSE in a popular 1 minute brutal fight.
LAGUNA LIL devastated BOMBA YEARN in a popular 1 minute uneven brawl.
WAKKO was devastated by HARRY in a 1 minute mismatched match.
BEACH BETTY handily defeated CONDEMNED PIRATE in a 1 minute uneven fight.
SANDY SHORE vanquished CULT MEMBER in a 1 minute uneven duel.
TOTAL DISASTER 1.0 vanquished EMBEZZLING SCRIBE in a 1 minute uneven fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         AIMED BLOW        29 -  12 -  2      71  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         SLASHING ATTACK    7 -   3 -  2      70  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         LUNGING ATTACK    21 -   9 -  1      70  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         STRIKING ATTACK   10 -   6 -  1      63  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         WALL OF STEEL     10 -   7 -  0      59  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      1         PARRY-LUNGE        7 -   8 -  1      47  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         BASHING ATTACK    11 -  13 -  1      46  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      4 -   6 -  0      40  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         TOTAL PARRY        3 -   8 -  0      27  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  0         PARRY-STRIKE       2 -   7 -  0      22  |

Turn 537 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         1 -  2         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         2  AIMED BLOW     
WALL OF STEEL      2 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         2  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  BASHING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  0         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                                                                1  STRIKING ATTACK
                                                                1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   TURTLEFACE 5734            11   1  0  104 WASTELAND II (267)
AIMED BLOW       CLARITIN JUNKIE 5735       11   2  0  106 WASTELAND II (267)
STRIKING ATTACK  PINK NOSE 5764              7   0  0   74 WASTELAND II (267)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is WAKKO 3449.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
DIKEMBE MUTUMBO 3267.  The ten other most popular fighters were TURTLEFACE 5734, PINK 
NOSE 5764, LAGUNA LIL 5681, HARRY 4851, CLARITIN JUNKIE 5735, TOTAL DISASTER 1.0 
5778, UMBRELLA MAN 5600, SALTON SEAHORSE 5713, BOMBA YEARN 5765, and BEACH BETTY 
5768.

The least popular fighter this week was WAKKO 3449.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were CAT-IN-THE-HAT 3270, SANDY SHORE 5769, BEACH BETTY 5768, BOMBA YEARN 
5765, SALTON SEAHORSE 5713, UMBRELLA MAN 5600, TOTAL DISASTER 1.0 5778, CLARITIN 
JUNKIE 5735, HARRY 4851, and LAGUNA LIL 5681.

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

SWEATY (7-4850) BRAIN (467)