DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 06/15/2006    Duedate: 07/12/2006

ARKERS ARENA

DM-8    TURN-271

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

INOCHI
YAKUZA (541)
(8-4730) [15-1-0,157]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

INOCHI                         NYTHIA
YAKUZA (541)                   PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)
(8-4730) [15-1-0,157]          (8-4923) [2-0-0,33]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

AUJARD                         AUJARD
LA PENTARCHIE (481)            LA PENTARCHIE (481)
(8-4639) [17-14-0,99]          (8-4639) [17-14-0,99]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

LA PENTARCHIE (481)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. HORN QUAFERS (572)          45
2. LA PENTARCHIE (481)         42      Z GLADIATORZ (519)
3. NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)     27      Unchartered Team
4. PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)       26
5. SMITHSONIAN (245)           26      HORN QUAFERS (572)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 1*ORCISH IDIOMS (563)       27   6  1 81.8   1/ 2 LA PENTARCHIE (481)      11  4 0
 2/ 0*HORN QUAFERS (572)         4   1  0 80.0   2/ 1 YAKUZA (541)             10  5 1
 3/ 2 Z GLADIATORZ (519)        71  38  0 65.1   3/ 4 ASSASSIN NATION (377)     9  6 2
 4/ 3 SMITHSONIAN (245)        514 335 13 60.5   4- 3*ORCISH IDIOMS (563)       7  3 0
 5/ 4 YAKUZA (541)             148  99  9 59.9   5/12 NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)   6  3 1
 6/ 6 LA PENTARCHIE (481)      218 170  4 56.2   6/ 7 SMITHSONIAN (245)         6  3 0
 7/ 7 NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)  141 112 13 55.7   7/ 6 Z GLADIATORZ (519)        6  4 0
 8-10 DOGPOUND (477)            55  50  3 52.4   8- 5 MIDDLE WAY 11 (546)       5  5 1
 9/ 9 DEAD FOR HIRE (60)        23  22  1 51.1   9/13*PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)     5  5 0
10/ 5*PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)      5   5  0 50.0  10/ 0*HORN QUAFERS (572)        4  1 0
11/14 ASSASSIN NATION (377)     33  36  5 47.8  11- 8 ENTENTER (534)            4  4 0
12-11 MIDDLE WAY 11 (546)       68  76  2 47.2  12/10 LEVIATHAN (556)           4  8 0
13-12*FURIOUS FIVE (543)        16  18  2 47.1  13/11 X-FORCE (484)             4 11 0
14-13 CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (202) 106 121  8 46.7  14/16*DEATH'S CHOSEN (570)      3  7 1
15-15 ENTENTER (534)            58  72  3 44.6  15-15*SOULTAKERS (553)          2  3 1
16/16 X-FORCE (484)            148 194 13 43.3  16- 9 CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (202)  2  3 0
17/ 0 CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (25)    13  18  3 41.9  17/ 0 CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (25)    1  1 1
18/17*DEATH'S CHOSEN (570)       3   7  1 30.0  18-18 DOGPOUND (477)            1  2 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/18 LEVIATHAN (556)           12  32  1 27.3  19-17*FURIOUS FIVE (543)        1  3 0
20-19*SOULTAKERS (553)           6  23  1 20.7  20/19 DEAD FOR HIRE (60)        0 11 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

Team Profile:  Penumbral Mists, Arkers DM-8

     Penumbral Mists has, quite literally, been lost in the mists.  Apparently, the
shuttle driver didn't understand my directions, or it was just Malborgia's smell.
Regardless, I found myself on a rain soaked island with nowhere to house my team.
Although Mythia and Morngrum were as stoic as ever, and all of us appreciated the
fact of Malborgia's bath, this left me in a difficult situation.  I knew no one, had
expended the last of my local currency, and had no clue as to where I should go to
receive trustworthy council.
     As fate should have it, our dear Golem (the aforementioned smelly fellow)
appears to have been constructed with a built in directional locator--a fact I was
fully unaware of.  The direction known, Morngrym offered to make a raft to reach the
mainland, and convert it to a cart for overland travel.  After giving the matter due
consideration, I agreed.  My skills in matters arcane are quite varied (though not
considerably potent) and I judged that I could help strengthen their work and
increase our endurance for the journey.  We'd pay for it latter though.
     Needless to say, we had a few 'adventures' on our trip from Noblish Island (as I
now know it), but on a cold, foggy morning, we stepped out of the mists to the sight
of Arkers.  Now the story truly begins.

-- Michael Eldritch
Manager of Penumbral Mists
Compulsive Compiler of Matters Arcane

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 270): INOCHI of YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 543): BIONIC BUFFALO of DO IT AGAIN (The Dark One, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 542): MITOCHONDRIAC of BIO WARFARE (Xerxes, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 535): SMELLY of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 532): MIKELA POOLE of KRILL CAVALRY (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 531): BIG JOY of SPONGMONKEYS (The Dark One, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 529): ALBUQUERQUE of HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 524): TRIPLE-X of LOVE LETTERS (Cunning Linguist, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 494): THE MAD CARROT of GARDEN OF HORRORS (The Sandman, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 485): OSTRICH of BIRDS (JE, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 476): BREAK POINT of CYNICAL DELUSIONS (Eclipse, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 218): INSOLENT IRIS of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 391): ONE-TIMER of DEATH STUDS VII (Death Stud, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 380): BOUNCING BEA of WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 173): KAT of NIGHTHAWKS (Savant, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 428): BRUENOR BATTLEHAMME of FORGOTTEN REALMS from BARIKALA
                            (Talon Warsmith, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 270): YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 543): JGW EXPIRATION (JGW, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 542): THE DEATH SQUAD (Street Legal, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 535): KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 532): MONEY PIT (Papaiz, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 531): MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 529): HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 524): LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 494): LETHAL LEGION (Seraphim, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 485): MEDAL OF HONOR 26 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 476): CYNICAL DELUSIONS (Eclipse, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 218): HOPLITES (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 391): BIKINI BOTTOM (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 380): CAR AND DRIVER (Talon Volksie, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 173): AL-GHAZIS (Bones, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 428): KNIGHTS OF VIRTUE, etc. (JRK, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                   ----------------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 270): JERNIG MARS of MIDDLE WAY 11 (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 543): BIONIC BUFFALO of DO IT AGAIN (The Dark One, mgr.)
                   (turn 542): BUCKING BRAHMA of BULLDOGS (Kennelworth, mgr.)
                               SUPERBEAST of THE LIVING DEAD (Dartor, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 535): SMELLY of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 530): JOCKO of MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 494): THE MAD CARROT of GARDEN OF HORRORS (The Sandman, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 485): OSTRICH of BIRDS (JE, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 474): GLOW-ROOM of FANDILS (Wise Old Fandil, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 217): CAULIFLOWER EARS of OTTO'S PARTS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 391): BLUE BEANIE of DEMONS OF DARKNESS 2 (Rillion, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 379): MARIO ANDRETTI of CAR AND DRIVER (Talon Volksie, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 172): EYE OF THE KNEE DOLL of HAZAARDS OF CLONING (Crip, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     The sages err'd not in their foretelling of a god descending upon ARKERS, for I, 
Novgorodny Vir, have returned!  YAKUZA?  Who?  LA PENTARCHIE is the top team these 
days, buddies!  Those betting on CHAMPIONS OF STEEL lost their shirt, as CHAMPIONS OF 
STEEL lost their fighting abilities:  0-0-0.  Nothing works for a team like victory 
(How's that for a perceptive observation?) as NORTHERN BADLANDS can attest...  LA 
PENTARCHIE posted a nice gain, to come in 1st.  Everybody loves a winner...  The boys 
at HORN QUAFERS are walking tall, as they are ranked 10th on their first try!  Going 
for the Duelmaster soon?  Practice pays for HAMMURABI, who pummelled TIEN, to pocket 
24 points.  TIEN certainly had a baffled expression on his face, after losing to 
HAMMURABI and losing 51 points in the process!  SASHA BAL TOR found out that ARKERS 
isn't a democracy.  You've gotta be the best to be Duelmaster here!  So who's the 
team that's been walking into taverns last week and ordering milk?  Sounds like a PR 
stunt to me.   
     So much to report, so little time!  To quell some nasty rumors, the guys in 
ORCISH IDIOMS are not carrying any incurable diseases.  No need to avoid 'em.  Like a 
pup with its tail between its legs, LA PENTARCHIE scurried away from ORCISH IDIOMS.  
Oh, the shame!  Is it charming personality?  Conversational abilities?  Good oral 
hygiene?  Whatever it is, ZZZZ'S is the most challenged warrior.  Do my ears deceive 
me?  CHIANA (outclassed by 26 points) challenged V.BALTIMORE-'W.BALT, in what 
promises to be a fight.(!) V.BALTIMORE-'W.BALT had a quite go of it, putting CHIANA 
in hers place.  AROURA challenged HOSTILITY!  Who says LEVIATHAN are just a bunch of 
wimps!  AROURA of LEVIATHAN kept hers wits as she was subdued by HOSTILITY.   
     Like the wind whispering among the pines, do hearest I many disquieting rumors.  
Death (in the form of OL' GRIZ of NORTHERN BADLANDS) knocked on DAZZLER's door.  What 
will X-FORCE do?  The suspense is killing me.  Questions are being raised about the 
disposing of severed body parts in the arena.  A certain tavern in ARKERS would I 
avoid!   
     Do not think spyreporting in ARKERS is the highlight of my life.  My fingers 
tire and I fear my incessant prattling may cause unfair judgement upon my impeccable 
character.  ARKERS, I leave you now.  The Duelmaster has agreed to foot my bill at 
The Dripping Blade.  'Til next time-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 INOCHI 4730                  15   1  0   157       YAKUZA (541)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ALAIN DRAGOON 4716           18   8  0   109       LA PENTARCHIE (481)
 KISERU 4717                  12   5  1   107       YAKUZA (541)
 DART 4586                    20  10  1   106       X-FORCE (484)
 ZZZZ'S 4381                  21   8  0   105       Z GLADIATORZ (519)
 HAMMURABI 4219               13   9  0   103       SMITHSONIAN (245)
-HELEN OF TROY 4603           10   3  0   102       SMITHSONIAN (245)
 AUJARD 4639                  17  14  0    99       LA PENTARCHIE (481)
-NYTEMAIR 3602                13   9  1    99       CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (202)
 SASHA BAL TOR 4034           25  16  0    92       NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-KOOL GREEN 4568              14  16  1    85       ENTENTER (534)
-ME CHEAT U LOSE 4854          7   0  0    82       ORCISH IDIOMS (563)
 TIEN 4672                    17  12  1    80       YAKUZA (541)
 THUNDAR THE CRUEL 4661       10   9  0    80       NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)
-BLACK LAB 4265                9   4  0    74       DOGPOUND (477)
-WOLFHOUND 4158               12   6  0    72       DOGPOUND (477)
-BORZOI 3983                  12   7  0    72       DOGPOUND (477)
 MORE MOORE 4864               7   2  0    72       LA PENTARCHIE (481)
 V.BALTIMORE-'W.BALT 4598     16  21  0    69       LA PENTARCHIE (481)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-RICHARDTHELIONHEART 4023     12  14  1    66       SMITHSONIAN (245)
-LES PAUL 4757                12   3  0    66       ENTENTER (534)
 OL' GRIZ 4755                 8   3  2    66       NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)
 LADY MACBETH 4627             9   4  0    65       SMITHSONIAN (245)
-FEORDIS INK 4746             15  15  0    60       MIDDLE WAY 11 (546)
 ELIXIR 4815                   8   8  2    60       X-FORCE (484)
-ZIP 4383                      9   7  0    58       Z GLADIATORZ (519)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-IMBER LACK 4748              11  16  0    55       MIDDLE WAY 11 (546)
 MAX VON SCUM 4737             7   6  0    51       NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)
 LIN MINMEI 4875               6   3  2    48       YAKUZA (541)
-HOLGA KOBB 4898               3   2  1    45       MIDDLE WAY 11 (546)
 LURID 2943                    9   5  2    43       ASSASSIN NATION (377)
-CHAOS INVADER 4867            6   3  0    43       CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (202)
-KIK BAKET OW TOE 4852         4   2  0    42       ORCISH IDIOMS (563)
-ROCK GLAS HUT FUN 4851        5   2  1    38       ORCISH IDIOMS (563)
 CHIANA 4812                   6   7  0    37       LEVIATHAN (556)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 NYTHIA 4923                   2   0  0    33       PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)
-YOR DETHKALL 4850             7   5  0    32       CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (202)
-GOT CAT'S TONGUE 4855         6   1  0    32       ORCISH IDIOMS (563)
 SATANIC SMURF 378             8   4  0    30       DEAD FOR HIRE (60)
 ZERO 4658                     4   1  0    30       Z GLADIATORZ (519)
 VERTIGO PIRATE 380            8   3  0    29       DEAD FOR HIRE (60)
 HOSTILITY 4908                4   0  0    28       ASSASSIN NATION (377)
 SIR HEELIUS 159               6   2  1    27       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (25)
 SOHEI 4876                    5   4  1    26       YAKUZA (541)
-SPUD 4704                     3   4  2    26       FURIOUS FIVE (543)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-FAT CAT YUMMY 4863            5   1  0    22       ORCISH IDIOMS (563)
-SIR DAMAS 156                 4   3  1    22       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (25)
 AERYN SUN 4811                4   9  0    21       LEVIATHAN (556)
 MARSHMALLOW 4878              2   7  1    20       LEVIATHAN (556)
 B.A.S.H. 4909                 2   1  0    20       LA PENTARCHIE (481)
 ZINGER 4890                   3   2  0    19       Z GLADIATORZ (519)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-CHOW 4552                     1   4  1    19       DOGPOUND (477)
-MORG POTTS 4868               4   6  0    18       MIDDLE WAY 11 (546)
-CHACH 4703                    3   4  0    18       FURIOUS FIVE (543)
-SEYMOUR DUNCAN 4906           2   0  0    18       ENTENTER (534)
 CRUELTY 4911                  2   1  0    18       ASSASSIN NATION (377)
-CHUCK 4705                    4   3  0    17       FURIOUS FIVE (543)
-ALPHA SPRITE 381              3   5  0    16       DEAD FOR HIRE (60)
 THOR 4929                     1   0  0    16       HORN QUAFERS (572)
-LOU 4706                      4   3  0    15       FURIOUS FIVE (543)
 EXTINGUISH 4937               2   0  1    13       ASSASSIN NATION (377)
-OUTLAW 4888                   2   3  0    13       CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (202)
 BGAZ REDCLAW 4925             1   1  0    12       PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)
-LORD TALIMAR 320              2   4  1    11       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (25)
-EROTICA 4907                  1   0  1    11       SOULTAKERS (553)
 HNK 4932                      1   0  0    11       HORN QUAFERS (572)
 DECIMATE 4899                 2   3  1    10       ASSASSIN NATION (377)
 ZIPPETY 4889                  2   4  0    10       Z GLADIATORZ (519)
-GRIM 4795                     1   6  0    10       SOULTAKERS (553)
 LOKI 4930                     1   0  0    10       HORN QUAFERS (572)
-BLACK WIND 4900               2   1  0     9       CHAMPIONS OF STEEL (202)
-JACK RUSSELL 4877             1   0  0     9       DOGPOUND (477)
 SITH-WEASEL 4933              1   0  0     7       HORN QUAFERS (572)
-TEETH 4862                    1   3  0     7       SOULTAKERS (553)
 MALBORGIA 4924                1   1  0     4       PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)
-SIR GILMERE 157               0   3  0     3       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (25)
-SWINETIGER 533                0   2  0     2       DEAD FOR HIRE (60)
-TEARREAL VAN SOUL 4866        0   2  0     2       SOULTAKERS (553)
 AROURA 4928                   0   2  0     2       LEVIATHAN (556)
 MORNGRYM 4926                 0   2  0     2       PENUMBRAL MISTS (571)
 TYR 4931                      0   1  0     1       HORN QUAFERS (572)
-DISTORTION 4910               0   1  0     1       ENTENTER (534)
-DEADBOY 4897                  0   1  0     1       SOULTAKERS (553)
 UGLY KIDD JOE 4942            0   1  0     1       NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
NOBLE ASSASSIN 396     0  1 0   1                   KISERU 4717           271 NONE    
FOUL 2940              5  5 0 ASSASSIN NATION 377   LIN MINMEI 4875       268         
SOLOMON GRUNDY 2547    0  1 0 CELESTIAL KNIGHTS 25  SHEWISH GIANT 405     271 NONE    
FAELA VAELISS 4919     1  1 0 DEATH'S CHOSEN 570    SIR HEELIUS 159       271         
OVERDRIVE 4792         6  6 0 ENTENTER 534          LURID 2943            268 REVENGED
FLOYD ROSE 4886        2  3 0 ENTENTER 534          DECIMATE 4899         269         
WILL NEVER TV 4887     1  3 0 LA PENTARCHIE 481     ROCK GLAS HUT FU 4851 267 REVENGED
JINX 4927              0  1 0 LEVIATHAN 556         ZAERENA NAILO 4920    270         
ZIAN-CHI LU 4922       1  1 0 PENUMBRAL MISTS 571   EXTINGUISH 4937       271         
MOREGANA 4793          1  5 0 SOULTAKERS 553        SPUD 4704             267 NOT REVE
JOKE 4939              0  1 0 X-FORCE 484           SHEWISH GIANT 405     271 NONE    
SPEED 4940             0  1 0 X-FORCE 484           STONE GOLEM 410       271 NONE    
DAZZLER 4849           9  5 1 X-FORCE 484           OL' GRIZ 4755         271         
SUNFIRE 4856           6  5 0 X-FORCE 484           HOLGA KOBB 4898       269 REVENGED

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Dead For Hire -- Welcome back.  Glad to see you here. -- Curator, Smithsonians

Wolfhound -- I hope this does not move you from the Dog Pound to the doghouse. --
Helen Of Troy

Jernig Mars -- A salute to your ability to turn it around.  I wish my former husband
had been more capable of that. -- Lady Macbeth

Alain -- Ah shucks! -- Hummurabi

Hal must have eaten the confirmed ads that we sent last time.  Seems as though Hal is
rather inconsistent these days.  Perhaps it is time to retire him to the museum. --
Curator

     That's the best idea I've heard all week!  It looks like he ate a LOT of
     personals for this arena last month.  I can't recall what might have been
     happening to make him so ravenous though. -- Ed.

Inochi -- A salute to the continuing Duelmaster. -- Curator

Inochi -- Wow!  You continue to show your mettle and that you are the BEST. -- The
Zee Man

Kiseru -- THAT was brutal!  You woke me up! -- ZZZZZ's

Swinetiger -- Thanks for the challenge and the easy win.  Welcome back to our world.
-- Zinger

B.A.S.H. -- Score one for the good guys! -- Zero

Hum, I guess Hal ate our ads last turn.  Naughty Hal.  And Lady Fern distracted
Blackstorm lads from the fight here.  Naughty Lady.  Anyway...on turn 269 the old guy
got the 1-0, and this turn we draw 1-1...so we are now 3-2 for the Frenchies.  Glory!
Let's now try a few hazardous challenges. -- Le Pentarque

That was close, Hammurabi!  Maybe next time.... -- Alain

Damn, do I hate these Orcs. -- Le Pentarque

I'm still hungry for more, Tien! -- Aujard the learning

Salute to the astoundingly ancient Dead for Hire. -- Le Pentarque

Ack, I don't like to be beaten by a basher.  Dark Arena soon? -- B.A.S.H.

All -- These may arrive a bit bunched with the ads sent by Kom-per-ter.  A nice
device a friend has.  Don't get your hopes up yet, Pentarque, for I have no talent
yet!  But I will try to contact you and some other friends when I can. -- Blackstorm

Pentarque -- Nice show!  I see my Nytemair is having trouble with the Top Dogs but
he'll come through. -- Blackstorm
P.S.  Really sorry about hard times.

Curator/Z-Man/Pentarque -- Having fun yet?  I am.  I'd just like to mention that I
may be very slightly occupied with a certain alliance I've just gone to war with.
Nothing for us to be concerned with here, unless certain teams decide to mess with me
here at home.  But I believe that everyone should behave.  Luck. -- Blackstorm

Tom Sawyer -- Painting fences with that must go real fast.  No wonder you're always
in trouble.  Grats. -- Nytemair

the Scribe -- I'm really sorry.  I have no copies of their census sheets.  Please
don't let that stop you.  There was a team spotlight done.  It was a bit rough and
I'm not fussy or "difficult," so feel totally free to use your imagination regarding
my savage, brutal mercenary female fatales! (ex-slaves) -- Blackstorm
P.S.  I'm learning how to use a computer, but I'll not be ready quite yet.  (I'm
getting old!!)

Ghost of Jinx -- I am truly sorry.  You fought well. -- Arena Nailo

Leviathon -- My apologies for my master's choice in souls.  It was not our intent. --
Azaziel (mgr. Death's Chosen)

Zippety -- OW!  Head hurt.  My type of woman! -- Thog Skullreaver

Morngrym -- Want to borrow my "breast" plate?  Looks like you need it. -- Faela

Arena Master -- I was just wondering, where are my fighters in the player rankings?
-- Azaziel (mgr. Death's Chosen)

Jack Russell -- Nice off-hand...maybe next time. -- Boaz Redclaw

Decimate -- Thanks for the introduction to Arkers.  Next time I'll wear better
headgear! -- Nythia

Destortion -- Could I recommend a good armorer? -- Zian-Chi Lu

Illmyrn Nailo -- You hit 'lot...but hurt little.  How that? -- Malborgia

Faela Vaeliss -- Well fought, fair lady.  That was a vicious lunge. -- Morngrym

All -- Salutations, my fellow managers!  I welcome any commentary you all might have
on Arkers "protocol," and apologize for any breaches I might commit in the meanwhile.
Well met, and good luck! -- Michael Eldritch, mgr. of Penumbral Mists

Sensei Jan and Yakuza -- Thanks for the welcome!  When they say "they don't make them
like they used to," it's sadly not a compliment to those who were made the old way.
Managers have learned a lot during our 20 year hiatus that even with solid strategies
this team will have to be "disbanded" DA-style from the top down. -- SwineTiger

Dazzler -- (squinting)  I'd shake your hand, since you offered it, or at least they
say here you offered it, but I can't see through the dazzle. -- Holga Kobb

Fat Cat Yummy -- Indeed, yummy in the tummy, except for the hairballs.  Those are the
pits. -- Morg Potts
P.S.  Hey, does the warrior who's causing the standing-around-doing-nothing get to
make "bored" comments?  Just asking.

Lady Macbeth -- As you see, crime does not pay. -- Jernig Mars
P.S.  And my thanks for that critical win.

Thundar the Cruel -- Oh, a tough guy, huh?  (pause to turn over fight report)
(wince)  Yep, I guess you are. -- Ferodis Ink

Vertigo Pirate -- It's the spiral tattoos, right?  That'd do it. -- Imber Lack

Huh, looks like you'll have two bunches of personals from us, because last cycle's
didn't get in.  I choose to blame that on the spammers. -- Leeta, the Middle Way

     No, just one bunch.  Anything that should have been in last turn went gods-only-
     know-where. -- Ed.

We at Northern Badlands have missed our home, we will endeavor to be more active. --
Maximillian

Slugbait -- What happened to the Blackthorn Orcs, don't tell me they've been replaced
by these upstarts. -- Maximillian

Blackstorm -- Where are you, were back to make life difficult for you again. :) --
Maximillian

Good to see you in another one of my arenas, Jangirl, "it's clobbering time". --
Maximillian

Curator my old friend, sorry I left after bugging you for so long to come back, we
are back now for the foreseeable future. -- Maximillian

Inochi -- Such a nasty little girl you are. -- Sasha Bal Tor

Feordis Ink -- Man, did that hurt, it had too, hehehe! -- Thundar the Cruel

Satanic Smurf -- A smurf is no match for a Griz. -- Ol' Griz

Rock glass hut fun -- Man you're a big boy, ugly, but big. -- Max Von Scum

26 May 2006
     The Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire want to announce the joining of a new
member who cherishes the same ideals, respect and loyalty that we hold dear.
     From this day forward let all know that Blackstorm is now a Dark Knight of the
Desolate Empire Alliance.  With him as our chosen brother, our alliance only becomes
stronger.  Let all his foes become ours, and ours his.  May all our enemies' blood
flow freely and give NO quarter in war.
     This is also a warning to any cowards, bullies, etc....  If you play with fire,
you WILL get burnt!!!

Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire

6 June 2006
To those involved, no, I have not abandoned your stories.  But I've been letting them
drift, and that has to stop, so I am taking the time to make sure that I know where
they are going, more than just "what happens next" dreamed up on the fly, before
resuming work on them.  No new stories will be started until at least one of the old
ones has concluded, for the same reason:  quantity can't substitute for quality.
Your patience in this matter is appreciated. -- the Scribe

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

JOKE was dealt death by SHEWISH GIANT in a 2 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
SOLOMON GRUNDY was dispatched by SHEWISH GIANT in a 2 minute Dark Arena battle.
SPEED was killed by STONE GOLEM in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
ALAIN DRAGOON won victory over ZZZZ'S in a 2 minute gory master's Challenge brawl.
ELIXIR was defeated by THUNDAR THE CRUEL in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Challenge match.
LIN MINMEI was devastated by MORE MOORE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
CHIANA was devastated by V.BALTIMORE-'W.BALT in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
AROURA was outwaited by HOSTILITY in a dull 12 minute beginner's Challenge fight.
NYTHIA won victory over SATANIC SMURF in a 3 minute Challenge duel.
MALBORGIA was vanquished by MARSHMALLOW in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
DECIMATE was overpowered by B.A.S.H. in a 1 minute uneven Challenge match.
MORNGRYM was luckily beaten by ZINGER in a tiresome 15 minute brutal Challenge fight.
EXTINGUISH delivered the death blow upon ZIAN-CHI LU in a 1 minute Challenge conflict.
INOCHI savagely defeated SASHA BAL TOR in a 2 minute veteran's Title brawl.
KISERU assassinated NOBLE ASSASSIN in a 1 minute bloody one-sided duel.
DART unbelievably bested AUJARD in a crowd pleasing 7 minute bloody veteran's fray.
TIEN was devastated by HAMMURABI in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
DAZZLER was killed by OL' GRIZ in a exciting 5 minute brutal bout.
LADY MACBETH outlasted FRATSFA MERCENARY in a unpopular 10 minute mismatched conflict.
LURID narrowly defeated SOHEI in a 2 minute gruesome fight.
MAX VON SCUM subdued VERTIGO PIRATE in a 3 minute bout.
SIR HEELIUS put to death FAELA VAELISS in a 4 minute expert vs. amateur duel.
ZIPPETY was savagely defeated by BGAZ REDCLAW in a 8 minute gory match.
AERYN SUN was defeated by ZERO in a exciting 3 minute duel.
ZAERENA NAILO was defeated by HNK in a 4 minute gory novice's duel.
THOG SKULLREAVER demolished TYR in a 1 minute one-sided melee.
ARAMIL DRALLION was vanquished by CRUELTY in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
ILLMYRN NAILO was overcome by SITH-WEASEL in a 3 minute amateur's bout.
LOKI vanquished UGLY KIDD JOE in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
THOR overpowered POLITE BEGGAR in a popular 1 minute uneven duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|BASHING ATTACK                  12         TOTAL PARRY       61 -  37 -  1      62  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   8         LUNGING ATTACK    42 -  31 -  3      58  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      8         BASHING ATTACK    47 -  38 -  6      55  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  8         AIMED BLOW        21 -  21 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    5         STRIKING ATTACK   59 -  64 -  6      48  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         SLASHING ATTACK   19 -  23 -  2      45  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         WALL OF STEEL      9 -  13 -  1      41  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         PARRY-STRIKE      10 -  17 -  0      37  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         PARRY-RIPOSTE      7 -  17 -  0      29  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-LUNGE        3 -   9 -  1      25  |

Turn 271 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         3 -  1     STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  5         3  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     5 -  3     PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  2         3  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        5 -  3     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  2         2  SLASHING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     7 -  5     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  4         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  1     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         1  AIMED BLOW     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
SLASHING ATTACK  INOCHI 4730                15   1  0  157 YAKUZA (541)
AIMED BLOW       ALAIN DRAGOON 4716         18   8  0  109 LA PENTARCHIE (481)
STRIKING ATTACK  KISERU 4717                12   5  1  107 YAKUZA (541)
TOTAL PARRY      DART 4586                  20  10  1  106 X-FORCE (484)
LUNGING ATTACK   HAMMURABI 4219             13   9  0  103 SMITHSONIAN (245)
BASHING ATTACK   TIEN 4672                  17  12  1   80 YAKUZA (541)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is AUJARD 4639.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
AUJARD 4639.  The ten other most popular fighters were DAZZLER 4849, INOCHI 4730, 
ZERO 4658, JOKE 4939, VERTIGO PIRATE 380, ALAIN DRAGOON 4716, OL' GRIZ 4755, BGAZ 
REDCLAW 4925, SITH-WEASEL 4933, and THOR 4929.

The least popular fighter this week was ZINGER 4890.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were MORNGRYM 4926, LADY MACBETH 4627, HOSTILITY 4908, ZIPPETY 4889, AROURA 
4928, UGLY KIDD JOE 4942, ILLMYRN NAILO 4917, ARAMIL DRALLION 4918, ZAERENA NAILO 
4920, and AERYN SUN 4811.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

DART (8-4586) X-FORCE (484)
SASHA BAL TOR (8-4034) NORTHERN BADLANDS (397)

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

JERNIG MARS (8-4749) MIDDLE WAY 11 (546)

                  MAIL-IN TOURNEY XLI

PRIMUS TOURNEY                         W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
CHRISTINE 4225 (76-36-5)               3  3  0         MUSICAL CHAIRS       
FRERE MAIN ROUJ 4082 (69-53-0)         0  5  0         LA PENTARCHIE        

FRESHMEN TOURNEY                       W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
ZIT 4385 (17-3-0)                      2  3  0         Z GLADIATORZ         

ADEPTS TOURNEY                         W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
HELEN OF TROY 4603 (9-2-0)             7  3  2         SMITHSONIAN          
LADY MACBETH 4627 (7-3-0)              2  3  0         SMITHSONIAN          
CHAOS INVADER 4867 (5-3-0)             1  3  0         CHAMPIONS OF STEEL   
YOR DETHKALL 4850 (7-4-0)              1  3  0         CHAMPIONS OF STEEL   

INITIATES TOURNEY                      W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
KIK BAKET OW TOE 4852 (3-1-0)          8  3  0         ORCISH IDIOMS        
ROCK GLAS HUT FUN 4851 (4-1-1)         7  3  0         ORCISH IDIOMS        
ME CHEAT U LOSE 4854 (5-0-0)           4  3  0         ORCISH IDIOMS        
MORE MOORE 4864 (4-2-0)                1  3  0         LA PENTARCHIE        

APPRENTICES TOURNEY                    W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
PILUM 4826 (3-1-1)                     3  3  0         PHOENIX FIRE         
FAT CAT YUMMY 4863 (3-1-0)             1  3  0         ORCISH IDIOMS        

ROOKIES TOURNEY                        W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
B.A.S.H. 4909 (0-0-0)                  2  3  0         LA PENTARCHIE        

CHALLENGERS FOOL TOURNEY               W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
DART 4586 (18-9-1)                     1  3  0         X-FORCE              
TOM SAWYER 4281 (15-5-0)               0  3  0         SMITHSONIAN          

CHAMPIONS FOOLS TOURNEY                W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
NYTEMAIR 3602 (13-8-1)                 2  3  0         CHAMPIONS OF STEEL   

INITIATES FOOLS TOURNEY                W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
GOT CAT'S TONGUE 4855 (5-0-0)          1  3  0         ORCISH IDIOMS        

APPRENTICES FOOL TOURNEY               W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
MISS MATCHED 4709 (2-2-0)              3  3  0         LADIES IN WAITING    
OUTLAW 4888 (2-2-0)                    0  3  0         CHAMPIONS OF STEEL