Date   : 04/28/2006    Duedate: 05/11/2006


DM-11    TURN-540

This Weeks Top Honors


(11-6239) [18-10-0,110]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

COLORIFIC (511)                JGW EXPIRATION (572)
(11-6239) [18-10-0,110]        (11-6673) [5-1-0,37]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

BULLDOGS (157)                 DEAD DOC TOADS (516)
(11-6372) [21-16-0,95]         (11-5726) [12-4-1,98]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. COLORIFIC (511)             50
2. MANIACAL TUFTS (431)        40      COLORIFIC (511)
3. ANIMAL FARM (510)           37      Unchartered Team
4. JGW EXPIRATION (572)        25

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*JGW EXPIRATION (572)      22   8  0 73.3   1/ 1*JGW EXPIRATION (572)     12  3 0
 2/ 3 COLORIFIC (511)          245 131  6 65.2   2/ 4 ANIMAL FARM (510)         8  3 0
 3/ 4 ANIMAL FARM (510)        991 589 34 62.7   3/12 COLORIFIC (511)           7  0 0
 4/ 2 DEAD DOC TOADS (516)      24  15  1 61.5   4/ 2 WHEN DOGMA FAILS I (535)  7  2 0
 5/ 6 DO IT AGAIN (565)         36  25  1 59.0   5/ 8*GORMEN GHAST (578)        7  8 0
 6/ 8 BULLDOGS (157)           848 659 28 56.3   6/ 7 MANIACAL TUFTS (431)      6  3 0
 7/ 7 DIRE FATE (42)            97  76  9 56.1   7/14 PLATEMAIL POLITICS (499)  5  3 0
 8/ 9 MANIACAL TUFTS (431)      84  70  2 54.5   8/ 5 BULLDOGS (157)            5  6 1
 9/16*I CARRY THEM (566)         6   5  1 54.5   9/ 3 ELFQUEST (515)            5 10 0
10/11 WHEN DOGMA FAILS I (535)  38  34  1 52.8  10/17 DO IT AGAIN (565)         4  0 0
11/12 SCARLET KNIGHTS II (507) 145 137  6 51.4  11- 9 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (253)    4  4 0
12-13 GERFEL'S FRIENDS (253)   710 694 19 50.6  12/10 SCARLET KNIGHTS (375)     4  5 1
13/14 LETHAL HERITAGE (570)     28  29  0 49.1  13/15 LETHAL HERITAGE (570)     4  5 0
14/ 0 IMMORTALS (85)           817 904 63 47.5  14/ 6 SCARLET KNIGHTS II (507)  3  8 0
15/18 ELFQUEST (515)           229 257 12 47.1  15/ 0 IMMORTALS (85)            2  3 0
16/ 0 THE LIVING DEAD (454)     71  81  5 46.7  16/13 DEAD DOC TOADS (516)      2  4 0
17/15*GORMEN GHAST (578)         7   8  0 46.7  17/11 KRILL CAVALRY (374)       2 12 0
18/20 PLATEMAIL POLITICS (499)  22  27  1 44.9  18/ 0 THE LIVING DEAD (454)     1  0 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/19 SCARLET KNIGHTS (375)    306 380 15 44.6  19/23*I CARRY THEM (566)        1  1 1
20/23 KRILL CAVALRY (374)      264 471  5 35.9  20/22 DIRE FATE (42)            1  3 0
21/ 0*THE RED HAND (579)         0   2  0  0.0  21/ 0*THE RED HAND (579)        0  2 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

Team Profile:  Dire Fate

     Some say they were banished, some say they were ashamed of the stage names they
were given, and others say they were just lost, but most agree they don't care where
Dire Fate was during their 20 year hiatus from Aruak City...even if they were
possibly the first to ever kill an Arena Master with Reignbo Warrior.
     While 20 years sounds like a long time to be gone from the arena sands, imagine
if that time away was spent meticulously watching, studying and cataloging the
fighting habits of every prominent warrior in Aruak City (or "the A.C." as it's now
called by the younger duelers).  In any case, continue to imagine that every sword
that is broken and every gladiator who wears down their competition by exhaustion
adds another statistic to the ultimate compendium of knowing thy competition.  And
while this type of extensive analysis is fun to imagine, it sadly wasn't the case.
In fact, during their departure Dire Fate was so far removed from the world of
gladiatoring, they referred to their previous vocation as "gladiatoring."
     So why have they returned?  Because they owe my boss money and this is how
they're going to work off their debt (keep in mind that we don't always bet on our
own).  It also explains why they've got me as a manager...my boss didn't want to
shell out the extra coins for Lord Xiang, JGR or one of those other managers who
believe fighting involves such bizarre concepts as "strategy" and "winning".  Nope,
they got me whose motto is the less armor and weapons you use, the cheaper you are to
compete and dispose of. Of course, I'm no slouch on the training front...just check
out my record in Arkers and you'll see that I've only lost one fight to date in my
entire career.
     Keep in mind that Dire Fate is just one of the teams I manage and "train," with
the following under my belt as well:  Dead For Hire (Arkers), Fantasia Isle
(Lyratilan), Voodoo Zoo Etc. (Chimlevtal) and House of Rats (Jhans), three of which
took the top Career Win-Loss spots on their recent returns.  Collectively, I refer to
them as the Institute of Wreckology (or Breakneckology, but the latter didn't fit on
the stable crest).  I also have a new team heading to Mordant for the Olympics...
they'll be the ones with the crutches.
     As geriatric as my warriors are, we hope to bring back the action and excitement
of the good old days, even if it means taking a fall or two to boost the egos of our
opponents...and there's been plenty of boosting lately.

Rust in peace,

Manager of the Institute of Wreckology
Vendor of Sapleens... (salted spleens), the Dark Arena's tastiest export

           + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Out of the Past #21 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

     Shania's position in the line of riders was close behind the magician and the
man she guessed was the leader of this band of elves.  She could hear them clearly as
they talked, which suggested that either they didn't think she could understand their
language, or that she would never be in a position to make hostile use of what she
heard.  Her guess was that the first was the strongest factor, because they were not
speaking the language of the high elves which seemed to be so peculiarly pervasive
across many universes.  But she was a master of information, and that included a gift
for learning languages with incredible speed.
     She learned that the magician's name was Houlisarmin, and he was arrogant and
that he was contemptuous of elves of his race who were of lower...caste, of all elves
who were not of his race, of women of any race, of...nearly everybody.  Such an
attitude was a grave weakness in a magician, and she would find a way to use it
against him.  Had already, by leading him astray from her companions.
     The leader of this raiding party was Benauloire, and while he was not so filled
with contempt for others as the mage, he had a good plenty of it.  The leader of the
smaller group the gladiators had ambushed was Kielisnirs, and nobody liked him or
cared whether or not he ever returned to rejoin the group.  Which he wouldn't, all
that little group had been killed, and a good riddance.
     "But I do think," Benauloire said, "that the Prince was less than wise to send
us out at this time.  With the goblin war to manage, he should not have weakened the
city's forces by our hundred."
     "Goblins!"  Houlisarmin's voice carried a heavy sneer.  "As if those mongrel
beasts could ever be a treat to the True People!"
     "King Arrengilas has a value for them, apparently," the leader said.
     "Arrengilas fears Nishtar and thinks to bolster his forces with the beasts.
This is good.  It will make it all the easier for us to strike at him unawares."
     Benauloire was silent for a moment, then said, "Prince Uthren is..." he sighed
and shook his head, "nothing good will come of treachery.
     "Arrengilas gives too much away to the lesser peoples, all in the name of
'politics'," Houlisarmin sneered.  "It will weaken us in the long run.  Uthren Dhu is
wiser and will make a better king."
     "If he is not overwhelmed because he has dispersed his forces on such raids as
this one!"
     "It is a ruse," the mage said, shrugging.  "Let Arrengilas see that all is
normal with us, and he will not think that Shavrad might be planning a master stroke
against him."
     The names meant nothing to Shania now, but she stored them in her memory.
Politics could be a tangle, and in such a situation, information was a potent weapon.
She would use it, as soon as she had located the right point to strike.  These people
were an offense against her concept of elves.  She would bring them down if she

     Ashon Chang squinted into the twilight, then glanced at Rughal.  "We could have
waited until morning to branch off into this scouting expedition," he said mildly.
"We'll have to stop soon anyway or break our horses' necks in a ravine we didn't
     "The horses can manage well enough for another hour, and then the moon will
rise," the ranger said.  "I don't want to waste time."
     Ashon Chang suppressed a sigh.  He was going to miss Vurand.  The orc was
closest to Rughal, strange though that would have seemed a year ago, and had provided
a buffer between Rughal's anger and his companions.  But Vurand had stayed with Tyrai
and the two lizard-folk.  Still, this was the right division of their forces.  He
was...nearly sure of that.  The large group to the north had to be scouted; Rughal
was best for that.  But someone needed to go with the ranger and make sure the
festering tension caused by the loss of Shania didn't lead him into something
foolish.  And a larger group did not make sense for scouting.  The others could
contact the lizard-folk that were supposed to live in the swamp and try to set up an
alliance.  But he still didn't like this dividing of their forces.
     "We should not ride all night," Ashon Chang said.  He kept his tone mild, but
firm.  "The horses will need rest."
     The silence seemed very long.  Finally Rughal sighed and admitted, "Yes.  A
couple of hours, then we'll stop.  Start on again before sunrise."

     Her captors kept going till sunset, when Benauloire ordered a halt.  The
magician protested, but the company's leader said, "We will gain nothing and lose
much by pushing on.  The horses need rest, and so does the new stock."
     "You may stop the company, I suppose," Houlisarmin said, "but you are not MY
commander, and I will continue.  I have no more time to waste wandering around out
     "You will kill your horse."
     "I should care?  It is an animal, a marginally useful brute.  There will be
others when I need them."  The magician urged his weary horse to a faster pace,
rapidly pulling away from the main group.
     Benauloire looked after him for a moment in silence, then said, "Fool."  The
word was soft but vehement.  Then he turned in his saddle and snapped orders to the
riders behind him.  He spoke quickly, and Shania didn't catch all the words, but it
was obvious that he was issuing orders for a halt and a night camp.  She wouldn't
object to rest, water, and food herself, if it was offered.  If the man had more than
that in mind things could get...exciting.  She was not so helpless as they might
think, especially with the magician gone.

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 269): INOCHI of YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 539): JEREMIAH JAY COOKE of GERFEL'S FRIENDS (Generalissimo
                               Puerco, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 539): LITTLE DEVIL of PLAYPEN (KAT, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 532): BIFF STREICHER of MEDIEVAL CHAOS (Huckle Cat, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 528): INNY MEANIE of MONEY PIT (Papaiz, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 528): BLOODSHED of MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 526): BALTIMORE of HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 521): PASTOR PENTANE of LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 490): DRIZZT of PHILANTHROPISTS (Aragorn, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 481): 5 GOT PICKED of 072905R (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 472): GLOW-ROOM of FANDILS (Wise Old Fandil, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 216): INSOLENT IRIS of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 388): ONE-TIMER of DEATH STUDS VII (Death Stud, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 376): BOUNCING BEA of WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)
                            (JRK, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 269): YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 539): JGW EXPIRATION (JGW, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 539): PLAYPEN (KAT, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 532): JUST CHILLIN (Mr. Freeze, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 528): MONEY PIT (Papaiz, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 528): MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 526): HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 521): LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 490): DI$C0MBU1@TED (Valamond, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 481): WANDERERS (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 472): FANDILS (Wise Old Fandil, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 216): SILVER KNIGHTS (Dark Knight Toker, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 388): SILENT WARRIORS (Ganolus Oakleaf, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 376): THE SUN CULT (Noachian, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 171): HAZAARDS OF CLONING (Crip, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 424): KNIGHTS OF VIRTUE, etc. (JRK, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 268): TOM SAWYER of SMITHSONIAN (The Curator, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 538): JO MOONCATCHER of KRILL CAVALRY (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 532): ZEBROE of THE ZOO (Leeta, mgr.)
               (turn 531): BLIZZARD of JUST CHILLIN (Mr. Freeze, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 528): BLOODSHED of MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 526): BALTIMORE of HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 521): PASTOR PENTANE of LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
             (turn 520): STEINBACH of THE A'S -- LOSERS II (Malaquar, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 490): DRIZZT of PHILANTHROPISTS (Aragorn, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 216): TORMENT of ASSASSIN NATION (Ghab, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 387): HEADROCK of OGRES ARE US (Ghoti, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 376): HITCH HIKER of WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Hi Aruak!

Sorry to be an absentee duelmaster but the boss was otherwise engaged and distracted.
But we're feeling optimistic, a little lady named Intendrid, from this very city and
this very team that I now represent, just stole Johrdeal's attention squarely back to
the arena!  Way to go, Ms. O'Reilly!

Your Duelmaster,
J.J. Cooke

                                      SPY REPORT

     Well, what are you looking at, ARUAK CITY?  Ain't you never seen Snide Clemens 
before?  Ah, shaddup and listen to my news.  Now keep the taverns open late tonight, 
for there are sorrows to drown for SCARLET KNIGHTS II, whose 0-3-0 this turn dropped 
them by 8 into 14th.  Ha!  COLORIFIC turned their 4-0-0 turn into a 3rd place rank in 
the listings this turn.  Any better than this, and you get put on hit lists.  Now 
let's all watch PLATEMAIL POLITICS' heads swell from their 3-1-0 this turn.  Haa ha 
ha ha!  Big shots, big talk, big deal.  Of course, we're all terribly impressed to 
see BLUE EYES win a fight and gain 17 points, terribly.  Tsk, tsk, BLUE EYES beat 
HURT and HURT lost 14 points.  You're breakin' my heart.  Due to absence, and 
inability to defend the throne, JEREMIAH JAY COOKE has lost the Title of Duelmaster.  
Start setting that alarm earlier!  And it's out with the old, in with the new, as 
YELLOW STREAK takes the Title and last week's bar tab from the old Duelmaster.  Heh, 
heh.  I'm not in a very good mood today, but why am I telling you this?  You want to 
know what's new, don't you, ARUAK CITY?   
     My mother always told me, 'If you don't have anything nice to say, start 
talking.' I loved that woman.  PLATEMAIL POLITICS, I suppose you'll be glad to know 
you were this turn's most avoided team.  Care to know who is the most afraid of you?  
And who led the way in this mass act of cowardice?  Let's see, well, whatcha know?  
It was JGW EXPIRATION.  Ha ha ha ha!  Ooh, I'm frightfully impressed, ROCKIE DEE was 
this turn's most challenged warrior.  Watch that ego swell, sports fans.   
     Death and Taxes.  The less death I see, the more it taxes my patience.  Let's 
see if anyone's dead or dying.  I CARRY THEM has cause to pause today, as SOULTAKER 
was sent to the Dark Arena, and came back--though not in the best of moods, I'll 
wager.  Titanium shields and bamboo daggers, guess what brave team is developing 
these kinds of weapons?   
     What does the ARUAK CITY arena have in common with the inns?  It's just as 
comfortable to sleep in either place.  Ha ha ha ha!  Phlllt!  Just had to do that 
before I leave the fine city of ARUAK CITY.  I feel much better now.  I see the 
crowds are getting restless, I must leave now-- Snide Clemens  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 YELLOW STREAK 6239           18  10  0   110       COLORIFIC (511)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SUPERBEAST 4943              18  28  1   107       THE LIVING DEAD (454)
 BIONIC BUFFALO 6570          14   3  0   106       DO IT AGAIN (565)
 NATAS 6531                   10   3  0   105       DO IT AGAIN (565)
-JEREMIAH JAY COOKE 6520      14  10  1   104       GERFEL'S FRIENDS (253)
 BLACK PLAGUE 6550            13   8  1   104       COLORIFIC (511)
 KILL STEELE 5726             12   4  1    98       DEAD DOC TOADS (516)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-BOOTSTRAP RIBEYE 6465        16  17  0    97       GERFEL'S FRIENDS (253)
 BUCKING BRAHMA 6372          21  16  0    95       BULLDOGS (157)
 DAMNUALL 6278                 9   4  1    91       WHEN DOGMA FAILS II (535)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LORD KRONOS 6111              9   4  0    89       MANIACAL TUFTS (431)
 ROCKIE DEE 6060              18  30  0    84       KRILL CAVALRY (374)
-THE SINGING BANDIT 6349      20  23  0    83       GERFEL'S FRIENDS (253)
 TREESTUMP 6369               18  27  1    82       ELFQUEST (515)
 ROMMEL 6621                   7   7  0    79       LETHAL HERITAGE (570)
-PINK PUMA 6537                9   4  0    77       ANIMAL FARM (510)
 DA HERETIC 5978               9   4  0    75       WHEN DOGMA FAILS II (535)
 MAGENTA MAGGOT 6627           7   4  0    73       ANIMAL FARM (510)
 BURN DA WITCH 5975            9   6  0    71       WHEN DOGMA FAILS II (535)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JON FLEET 6415                9  33  0    60       KRILL CAVALRY (374)
 VIOLET VULTURE 6612           9   2  0    59       ANIMAL FARM (510)
 WINDCHASER 6469               8  27  1    58       KRILL CAVALRY (374)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BULL HORN 6593               11   6  1    56       BULLDOGS (157)
 TURQUOISE TIGER 6556         10   6  0    56       ANIMAL FARM (510)
 BLUE EYES 6594                7   6  1    55       COLORIFIC (511)
-SILVER LINING 6339            8   7  0    53       COLORIFIC (511)
 DIRK DARKBLADE 6528           7   8  1    53       IMMORTALS (85)
 TANGERINE TOAD 6603           8   2  0    52       ANIMAL FARM (510)
 PATTON 6619                   8   6  0    50       LETHAL HERITAGE (570)
 JUMPIN' 6704                  4   2  1    45       SCARLET KNIGHTS II (507)
 SACRED WARS SMURF 776         4   4  0    45       DIRE FATE (42)
 BLUE SMASH 6553               7   5  0    43       IMMORTALS (85)
 CEREAL KILLER 642             7   4  0    37       DIRE FATE (42)
 ROD GRIZZARD 6673             5   1  0    37       JGW EXPIRATION (572)
 FLYING NUN 6277               7   8  0    36       WHEN DOGMA FAILS II (535)
 ZYN'KYR 6579                  3   1  0    36       MANIACAL TUFTS (431)
 SKIRMISH 5457                 5   3  1    35       PLATEMAIL POLITICS (499)
 GHOST OF TIBERIUS 820         4   1  0    35       DIRE FATE (42)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FIONA STARMANTLE 5022         5   7  0    33       MANIACAL TUFTS (431)
 RICHARD HENDRIX 6672          5   1  0    33       JGW EXPIRATION (572)
 SPECIAL! 6526                 3   1  1    33       MANIACAL TUFTS (431)
 WHITE LIE 6659                3   2  0    33       COLORIFIC (511)
 SOULTAKER 6573                2   1  1    33       I CARRY THEM (566)
 SEPULCHRAVE 6739              2   1  0    33       GORMEN GHAST (578)
 HURT 6709                     5   1  1    31       ELFQUEST (515)
 SARAYA STEEL 6545             6   7  0    30       IMMORTALS (85)
-SNOTMAN 6577                  2   0  0    30       I CARRY THEM (566)
 MOLTEN METAL 5720             5   8  0    27       DEAD DOC TOADS (516)
 STRATEGIC REPOSITION 5945     4   5  0    27       PLATEMAIL POLITICS (499)
-SUPERFICIAL HITMAN 6734       2   0  0    27       GERFEL'S FRIENDS (253)
 REVEREND X 6715               2   2  0    27       WHEN DOGMA FAILS II (535)
 RED TAPE 6664                 5   2  0    26       PLATEMAIL POLITICS (499)
-LOUIE C 6532                  5   4  0    25       DO IT AGAIN (565)
-TYRANNOSAURUS ED 6590         3   0  0    25       DO IT AGAIN (565)
 TORRY FATEGIVER 6534          4  10  2    24       IMMORTALS (85)
 CHUCK DAVIS 6671              4   2  0    24       JGW EXPIRATION (572)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-VINCENT 5729                  3   0  0    23       DEAD DOC TOADS (516)
 MR. FLAY 6736                 2   1  0    23       GORMEN GHAST (578)
 EMPTY PROMISES 6668           5   3  0    22       PLATEMAIL POLITICS (499)
 PEE-WEE HERMAN 6677           3   2  0    22       LETHAL HERITAGE (570)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JEAN FELIX 6740               2   1  0    21       JGW EXPIRATION (572)
-THE LARANI NYMPH 777          6   2  0    20       DIRE FATE (42)
 RON STEELE 6670               5   1  0    20       JGW EXPIRATION (572)
 MAN'S BEST FRIEND 6694        5   2  0    19       BULLDOGS (157)
 KORO CLOUD 6618               2  13  0    19       KRILL CAVALRY (374)
-INFERNO 6575                  1   1  0    18       I CARRY THEM (566)
 LEETAH 6710                   3   3  1    17       SCARLET KNIGHTS (375)
 WOLFBROTHER 6706              3   3  0    17       SCARLET KNIGHTS II (507)
 ONE-EYE 6711                  2   4  2    17       SCARLET KNIGHTS (375)
 RAYEK 6712                    2   4  0    17       SCARLET KNIGHTS (375)
-CROW BAR 5721                 2   1  0    17       DEAD DOC TOADS (516)
 TWO-S0PEAR 6700               2   4  0    16       ELFQUEST (515)
 ARIES 6695                    2   3  0    15       BULLDOGS (157)
 FUCHSIA 6735                  1   2  0    15       GORMEN GHAST (578)
 YAMAMATO 6701                 1   0  0    13       LETHAL HERITAGE (570)
 NEVERWAKE 6705                3   3  0    12       SCARLET KNIGHTS II (507)
 WALK THE LINE 6708            3   3  0    12       ELFQUEST (515)
 BELL GROVE 6738               2   1  0    12       GORMEN GHAST (578)
 LON BRADDOCK 6617             1   5  0    11       IMMORTALS (85)
-LEAD 5936                     2   1  0     7       DEAD DOC TOADS (516)
-STU D. BAKER 6580             1   3  0     6       DO IT AGAIN (565)
 DELIA'S GONE 6707             0   6  0     6       ELFQUEST (515)
 IRMA P. 6737                  0   3  0     3       GORMEN GHAST (578)
-HOMBRE 6576                   0   2  0     2       I CARRY THEM (566)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
DARK CHAMPION 492      0  1 0 DARK ARENA 0          SOULTAKER 6573        540 NONE    
CHOPSTICK SURGEO 6656  2  3 0 GERFEL'S FRIENDS 253  ONE-EYE 6711          539         
ALONZO GEE 6674        1  2 0 JGW EXPIRATION 572    HURT 6709             537         
RUG SACRIFICE 12 6748  0  1 0 LETHAL HERITAGE 570   HIGH ELF 487          540 NONE    
STONE CRUSHER 6742     0  1 0 MANIACAL TUFTS 431    DARK CHAMPION 492     540 NONE    
OCSID 6746             0  1 0 THE RED HAND 579      MOUNTAIN TROLL 486    540 NONE    
DISCO 6744             0  1 0 THE RED HAND 579      BLACK ORC 488         540 NONE    
STISFACTION 6702       0  2 0 SCARLET KNIGHTS I 507 SPECIAL! 6526         536 NOT REVE
SYMPATHY 6703          1  4 0 SCARLET KNIGHTS I 507 BULL ET PROOF 6716    539 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Molten Metal -- Quite an impressive showing, but to no avail.  Maybe try something
different next time, like a winning attitude.  Good luck in the future. -- Richard

Mr. Flay -- Next time stay in the kitchen and bake me a pie.  After all, cooking and
baking might be a better career than trying to carry a filet knife into the arena.
There are better weapons, after all. -- Chuck Davis

Fuchsia -- In the words of the immortal poet M.C. Hammer, "Can't touch this!" -- Ron

Special! -- FOUL!  I don't know what's so special about you.  If you did that in a
game, you would foul out.  Next time I'll try a shot from downtown. -- Jean Felix

Delia's Gone -- One more round.  Good to know there's another Cash fan out there. --
Rod Grizzard

Citizens of Aruak City -- I'm ready to officially declare myself the unchartered King
of Aurak City.  If you have a problem with that, I'm down here and able to be
downchallenged.  Might do you "Health, Humility, Honor" hypocrites some justice.
After all, you're being beaten by your own game in your own home.  By a Delarquan, no
less.  Maybe you would fare better if you lower yourselves from your golden perches.
After all, some of you are good at trying dishonor those who grace your fair city.
<ahem>  Tankesh, where is your big mouth right now?  Got another dishonorable
statement to take yourself from the dregs you inhabit?  You could just be like your
other counterparts that show more honor than you; they welcome me and spar with my
warriors in honor.  Wow, I've even stooped to an Andorian tactic and only up-
challenged while I was here.  And where am I?  Hmmm.  I would suppose if a Delarquan
is able to take Andorian tactics and win with them to a degree never met by a
Andorian, then the Delarquan is hands above any Andorian.  Of course I could be
running my big fat mouth right now!  <hysterical laughter> -- JGW

Seraphim and Lord Xiang -- If Andorian honor is given my avoiding, I am dedicating
all five of my warrior's avoids to you both.  You have my respect and I honor you on
this battlefield we share within Aurak City against Andorian scum.  Of course, those
who have not dishonored me have my respect and honor.  I think I might want to
include Purple People Eater, Kennleworth (who is a worthy Delarquan-type manager in
wool), and Mino to those I have honor for. -- JGW

Blue Eyes -- Well, thank you for your one word, but your lessons are more valuable to
me, after all. -- Chuck Davis

Lord Xiang -- Thank you for noticing my efforts here.  After all if you can't lose to
them, don't join them!  Maybe you need to rethink your strategies here within the
city walls? -- JGW, who knows you came here to play by their rules

Seraphim -- Don't let Lord Xiang get to you.  After all, you have my number in
Mordant, don't you?!  You'll get back to good standing in this city in time.  When
you are fighting such inferior warriors with flawed morals.... -- JGW

Koro Cloud -- Don't give up, though.  It might be a good thing to have the 'worst
rate' comment associated with you.  Something for the masses to remember you by!
Honestly, I hope you do better in time and against those who are not Delarquan. --

Patton -- I was avoiding you, pal.  But you stubbornly pursued me.  Your offense was
better than my best defense.  A salute to your strategist. -- Tangerine Toad (feeling
sort of pastel)

DA Heretic -- What's a poor gal to do?  (Except hate you!) -- Violet Vulture

Treestump -- Well, shucks, I could have told them you were better.  Geez! -- Magenta

Shiver me timbers!  This'n old pirate done bragged me four 'n oh, 'n then gone 'n
done yon blimey oh 'n three.  Gonna walk yon plank er shut me mouth! -- Mino

Jeremiah Jay Cooke -- We critters salute your DM title.  Well done. -- The Animal
Farm Team

Jon Fleet -- Man, you can do just about anything your heart desires in that cellar.
(wink) -- Tangerine Toad

Scarlet Knights -- Mea culpa.  Another death.  We are so sorry.  Sympathy did not
need to die.  And for Bull Et Proof's first victory?  It was not worth the loss.
Sorry. -- Kennelworth

Sympathy -- I was just challenging "anyone" above but as close to me as possible.  I
did not mean to end your fighting days.  Truly.  I hang my head in sorrow. -- Bull Et

Jeremiah Jay Cooke -- All right!  Well done Duelmaster.  It is great to see a Gerfel
back on top.  Duelmasters drink free at The Bulldog Inn.  Let's celebrate. --
Kennelworth, Proprietor

Jo -- Feisty Bostonian?  Cool.  Do I talk THAT funny?  I do have some of their
characteristics.  For example, I can buck; I can be pushy; and I'm not very good. --
Bucking Brahma

Lord Xiang -- I didn't help you much with your prediction, did I?  I would have liked
to, though. -- Bucking Brahma (with NO loss last round)

Lord Kronos -- You were by better, as usual.  Ah the life of a horn blower.
Kennelworth sends his pfblttt! -- Bull Horn

Zyn'Kyr -- If I cannot pronounce your name, perhaps you should win. -- Man's Best
Friend (loud barking)

Windchaser -- Jazz?  Is that allowed? -- Bull Horn

Health.  Humility.  Honor. -- Kennelworth

JGW -- Shucks, and to think, we liked old Loco! -- Kennelworth

JGW Expiration -- Still getting it done, we see.  Well done to y'all and your
manager. -- Kennelworth

Godling?  Godling?  Godling?  Well, sometime back in my youth.... -- Kennelworth

Jeremiah Jay Cooke -- Congrats on taking the Throne!  I look forward to reading your
DM column. -- Lord Xiang

Dire Fate -- Welcome back to Aruak City, Swine Tiger! -- Lord Xiang, mgr. Lethal

JGW -- 11-4 three turn record?  NICE!!!  Zero kills?  What kind of Delarquan are you,
anyway? *grin* -- Lord Xiang, who can still root for his compatriots, even though
he's promised to play nice himself *evil grin*

JGW -- 72% win record?  SWEET!!!  Oh, wait, that's right.  I forgot you went native,
too. *chuckle* -- Lord Xiang

Kennelworth -- Tsk, tsk, tsk.  Bull Et Proof, too?  I think I shall hire a pollster
to conduct a survey of your fellow Andorian managers about the recent conduct of
stables belonging to The Consortium through out Andorian territories.  I have a hunch
we all know that the results will read that you should have a representative in
Mordant. -- Lord Xiang, enjoying himself immensely

Bull Horn -- Well, you'll be in good company, since you'll be sharing the dog house
with those members of Lethal Heritage that have lost to you. -- Ghengis

Kennelworth -- Fandil crotchety?  Doesn't sound too wise to me.  I think it was his
scribe got used to the easy life and deliberately messed up the orders Fandil
actually gave. -- Lord Xiang, not wanting to be turned into a newt

All -- I, too, want to echo Kennelworth's sentiments for everyone to have a grand
mailer!  Officially, my warriors are all Mordanti volunteers, but we all represent
Aurak City. -- Lord Xiang

Magenta Maggot -- The one and only!  Now, if I can only learn how to drive this new
fangled contraption! -- Patton

Kronos -- I would not seek your eternal death so I could have a few more minutes.  An
hour, maybe, but not a few measly minutes. -- Ghengis

JGW -- Re T537 post last turn.  Now, now.  Tankesh's nostrils aren't any more
elevated than any OTHER Andorian's.  Just keep up what you are doing.  He can't
ignore results for TOO long. -- Lord Xiang

Tangarine Toad -- Ahhhh, the infrequent taste of victory against a Consortium stable!
I shall savor this for quite some time. -- Patton

The Singing Bandit -- I'm surprised you were able to take such abuse and still live.
A word to the wise, don't try to keep holding on in that condition.  It can be
lethal. -- Rommel

Flying Nun -- I usually make it a point to avoid religious women.  That certainly WAS
one sided.  I'll have to send somebody better suited to deal with you.... -- Fiona

Bull Horn -- <scoffing gentle laugh>  Mortals.... -- Lord Kronos

Man's Best Friend -- You must be a dog to have a name like that.  Despicable.... --

Jean Felix -- Za BOON!  Who's next?! -- Special!

Kennelworth -- I imagine your brother Fandil is waiting for Adie to show up in
Ardivent?  Well, it seems she is stuck with him off in another land and is...
preoccupied.  It would be a shame if she never returned.... (dripping sarcasm and
evil grin) -- Fiona Starmantle

Purple People Beast -- <sarcastically> Oh, we're SO sorry that poor Adie or Tankesh
could not reply to your frivilous drawl.  We'll make sure to take care of you in
their absence. -- Fiona

JGW -- Since Tankesh is off, probably busy fighting Demons or some silly nonsense, I
think we can speak for him <wicked grin>.  You know, like your countrymen, I do not
kill discriminately, but I would have to agree (rolling eyes) with that silly elf
that Mordant IS truly a cesspool of backstabbing scum.  Not that I wouldn't be right
at home in that sort of culture, but I am above that and much too refined.  I save my
best for the 'good' people of the world.  Scum like the Mordanti are mere stepping
stones to toss away at my convenience. -- Fiona, 'Dark' Elven Shadow Arcanist.
P.S.  JGW, you can expect that you're own misplaced sense of honor, indeed how you
see yourself, will always be trampled on in Aruak, by these 'honorable' Andorians, or
by the truly...ruthless, who lurk in the shadows.  I'll let you figure out who that
refers to on your own...if you are capable. <knowing smile>

Lord Xiang -- <rolling eyes> -- Zyn'kyr

Ghengis -- Indeed Bull Horn WAS tasty! -- Lord Kronos

Lord Xiang -- I will see what I can do about challenging in the Guard. -- Kalidor

Jeremial Jay Cooke -- Ah, glad you won that fight.  It's always best to take the
title with a win.  Congratulations. -- Jo Mooncatcher

Bionic Buffalo -- There they are again, those nasty, biting, electronic bugs!  I hate
'em!  Take them AWAY. -- Rockie Dee

Burn Da Witch -- That seems...unimaginative. -- Jon Fleet

Superficial Hitman -- Ah...you just tap your target lightly on the shoulder, eh? --
Koro Cloud

Jumpin' -- It makes my knees hurt just looking at you. -- Windchaser

Kennelworth -- (exasperated scowl)  I'm a guy. -- Jo Mooncatcher
P.S.  It's short for Joseph.

Tankesy, Crystal Fireblade, and In Gerfel We Trust aka Raoul -- I'll try to get
something written for this time (I even KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!), but I was offered a
chance to spend the day goofing off in good company, and how can I say no? -- the

28 March 2006
We of the Desolate Empire Alliance want to welcome two managers to our fold.  Kon of
the Empire Rising, and Osiris!  May they be blessed with the blood of their enemies,
and give no quarter in War! -- Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire

11 April 2006
To all those lookin' for some easy pickins:  I, Elfwine, manager of The Shallowship,
the most feared team in all of Jhelum, invite all who seek wide open spaces for pubs
and other such establishments of limited debauchery, to visit this deserted city and
help me clear up some of the dust.  I'm just about ready to have my guys face off
against each other to get some new action.  Guess I'd better join a tournament or
something...hmmmm, there's a thought.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

SOULTAKER delivered the death blow upon DARK CHAMPION in a 2 minute Dark Arena fight.
RUG SACRIFICE 120 was slaughtered by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute Dark Arena battle.
OCSID was murdered by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
DISCO was slaughtered by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
STONE CRUSHER was butchered by DARK CHAMPION in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
YELLOW STREAK luckily beat KILL STEELE in a 3 minute master's Challenge Title match.
BUCKING BRAHMA was defeated by BIONIC BUFFALO in a 1 minute Challenge struggle.
BLACK PLAGUE overcame DAMNUALL in a action packed 1 minute expert's Challenge fight.
LORD KRONOS vanquished ROCKIE DEE in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
VIOLET VULTURE luckily beat JON FLEET in a popular 3 minute expert's Challenge duel.
BLUE EYES overpowered HURT in a 1 minute uneven Challenge match.
BULL HORN beat JUMPIN' in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
FIONA STARMANTLE savagely defeated MOLTEN METAL in a 3 minute Challenge match.
ROD GRIZZARD devastated LEETAH in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge battle.
SPECIAL! was bested by TANGERINE TOAD in a 4 minute Challenge bout.
PEE-WEE HERMAN handily defeated NEVERWAKE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge conflict.
MAN'S BEST FRIEND unbelievably bested FUCHSIA in a 13 minute Challenge bout.
ARIES was vanquished by MR. FLAY in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fray.
RED TAPE bested ONE-EYE in a 3 minute Challenge brawl.
IRMA P. was overpowered by RAYEK in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
SEPULCHRAVE beat RON STEELE in a 2 minute Challenge bout.
JEAN FELIX outlasted WALK THE LINE in a 9 minute bloody Challenge fight.
REVEREND X devastated KORO CLOUD in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest.
NATAS overpowered TREESTUMP in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
SUPERBEAST overpowered ROMMEL in a 1 minute uneven fray.
DA HERETIC handily defeated DIRK DARKBLADE in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
BURN DA WITCH demolished CEREAL KILLER in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
MAGENTA MAGGOT vanquished PATTON in a 1 minute one-sided match.
FLYING NUN was vanquished by WINDCHASER in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
TURQUOISE TIGER luckily beat SACRED WARS SMURF in a exciting 3 minute gruesome melee.
SKIRMISH overcame TORRY FATEGIVER in a action packed 1 minute brutal bout.
SARAYA STEEL handily defeated OSKSI NOBLE in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
GHOST OF TIBERIUS luckily beat LON BRADDOCK in a 2 minute fight.
RICHARD HENDRIX won victory over WOLFBROTHER in a 2 minute fray.
BLUE SMASH overpowered DELARQUAN SPY in a popular 1 minute one-sided match.
ZYN'KYR overpowered STRATEGIC REPOSITION in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
TWO-S0PEAR was outlasted by EMPTY PROMISES in a monotonous 13 minute bloody fray.
DELIA'S GONE was outwaited by CHUCK DAVIS in a unpopular 22 minute fight.
WHITE LIE demolished BELL GROVE in a 1 minute mismatched match.
YAMAMATO overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided fray.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|TOTAL PARRY                     17         TOTAL PARRY       68 -  44 -  0      61  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  11         AIMED BLOW        49 -  39 -  2      56  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  10         SLASHING ATTACK   26 -  21 -  1      55  |
|AIMED BLOW                       9         WALL OF STEEL     16 -  14 -  1      53  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  8         BASHING ATTACK    28 -  27 -  4      51  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  7         LUNGING ATTACK    41 -  45 -  2      48  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    4         STRIKING ATTACK   28 -  32 -  3      47  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         PARRY-STRIKE       8 -  15 -  0      35  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         PARRY-RIPOSTE     15 -  33 -  0      31  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         PARRY-LUNGE        4 -  17 -  0      19  |

Turn 540 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

WALL OF STEEL      1 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     4 -  7         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  1     BASHING ATTACK     2 -  8         2  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY       11 -  6                                       2  AIMED BLOW     
SLASHING ATTACK    4 -  3                                       1  TOTAL PARRY    
AIMED BLOW         5 -  4                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  1                                       1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  2                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  4     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      YELLOW STREAK 6239         18  10  0  110 COLORIFIC (511)
AIMED BLOW       BIONIC BUFFALO 6570        14   3  0  106 DO IT AGAIN (565)
LUNGING ATTACK   NATAS 6531                 10   3  0  105 DO IT AGAIN (565)
STRIKING ATTACK  BLACK PLAGUE 6550          13   8  1  104 COLORIFIC (511)
BASHING ATTACK   BUCKING BRAHMA 6372        21  16  0   95 BULLDOGS (157)
SLASHING ATTACK  LORD KRONOS 6111            9   4  0   89 MANIACAL TUFTS (431)
WALL OF STEEL    BULL HORN 6593             11   6  1   56 BULLDOGS (157)
PARRY-STRIKE     ZYN'KYR 6579                3   1  0   36 MANIACAL TUFTS (431)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is BUCKING BRAHMA 6372.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was KILL STEELE 5726.  The ten other most popular fighters were JON FLEET 6415, 

The least popular fighter this week was DELIA'S GONE 6707.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were CHUCK DAVIS 6671, EMPTY PROMISES 6668, WALK THE LINE 6708,