Date   : 07/14/2003    Duedate: 07/26/2003


DM-14    TURN-467

This Weeks Top Honors


(14-3986) [11-11-0,87]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

CONAN                          POSITION IS EMPTY
THE DEATH SQUAD (63)           
(14-3986) [11-11-0,87]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

SOLLY BILL                     PRITHEE
THE DOGHOUSE (188)             DELIVERANCE (33)
(14-3998) [14-10-0,59]         (14-4092) [3-2-1,23]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. THE DEATH SQUAD (63)        35
2. THE DOGHOUSE (188)          21      THE DEATH SQUAD (63)
3. THE FELLOWSHIP (416)         0      Unchartered Team
4. DELIVERANCE (33)            -7
                                       IS IT MAN...? (381)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2 THE DEATH SQUAD (63)     267 242 23 52.5   1/ 1 THE DEATH SQUAD (63)     10  5 1
 2/ 4 DELIVERANCE (33)         426 474 44 47.3   2/ 3 DELIVERANCE (33)          8  6 1
 3/ 5 THE DOGHOUSE (188)       234 282  5 45.3   3/ 2 THE DOGHOUSE (188)        8  7 0
 4- 6*THE FELLOWSHIP (416)       4   8  0 33.3   4- 4*THE FELLOWSHIP (416)      2  0 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

           + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Andorians Abroad #11 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Sailing to Skaithvarn:

     The wind dropped at the end of the first day and didn't pick up the next morning
as expected.  The ship just sat still in the water--as far as Raoul and Jeri could
tell--with its sails flapping limply.
     "In a logical world," Jeri muttered, "if the wind stopped blowing AGAINST us,
we'd be able to make progress."
     Raoul grinned.  "Not much logic here, doll!"  He glanced toward Goff and
sobered.  "I just wish he'd stop looking so worried...."
     Berdan, the ex-assassin, who had vanished into his cabin as the wind dropped,
now reappeared.  He had some sort of small brass box in his hand.  "We're in
trouble," he announced quietly.
     Before the Fratsfan could elaborate on that, Goff came toward them from the
steering area, and he looked more worried than Berdan.  "We're in trouble," he said.
"We're lost--"
     "How can we be lost?" Jeri demanded, her voice rising.  She looked around
anxiously.  The water looked much the same in every direction.  The sky had the kind
of thin, milky overcast that turned it to a sheet of glaring white, with no one
direction obviously brighter than another.  "The Trier's not that wide, can't we just
sail west until we come to Skaithvarn, and then figure out whether we're north or
south of Istoreth?"
     "Tell me which way's west, and I'll do it--even if I have to row," Goff said.
     "Ah."  Berdan nodded and held out his brass box, which they could now see was a
compass.  Or had been a compass.  The needle under the glass dome swung lazily around
and around, though the ship was not moving.  "I presume your ship's compass is now as
useless as this?"
     "Yeah," Goff admitted.  "It--"
     There was a sort of ripple in the air, not something to be seen, but only felt
as a shiver across their skin.  The compass needle whirled and steadied, indicating
north as being to the right of the ship.  A breeze from the north ruffled the surface
of the water.  Goff's two crew members leaped to adjust the sails.
     "Can you explain any of this?" Raoul asked.
     "No, but it's happened before," Goff said grimly.  "There've been reports of
this kind of thing--becalmed and the compass doesn't work, then eventually the wind
and the north come back.  And some ships have been lost entirely, like maybe they
never did get their bearings back--"
     "And KNOWING this, you still set out to sail to Skaithvarn?  Are you CRAZY?"
Jeri demanded.
     "What should we do, cower in our houses and wait for the Grey Witch to make
everything safe again?" the manager demanded.  "One ship in twenty, maybe, has
reported losing the north for a while.  Only one in...a hundred, or maybe more has
failed to come back.  It's a gamble, but heck, LIFE is a gamble."
     One of the crewmen had climbed to the very top of the mast and was examining the
horizons with a spyglass.  "Land ahead!" he reported.  "Looks like the Volarbyn
     At Raoul's questioning glance, Goff said, "Highlands just north of Istoreth."
     "Ship coming from the north," the lookout added.  "I don't recognize her
shape...."  He continued to stare northward through the spyglass.
     "And that's the flip side of the problem," Goff said as he headed for the
steering area.  "Somebody getting lost from the Other Side, wherever that is.
Sometimes they act like pirates.  We may have a fight on our hands."

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Naturally, I couldn't let the Kung-Fu Master take the throne of Tobir arena.  He
would have had no idea what to do with it.  Probably he would have thrown out the
cushions, folded himself into a pretzel on the uncushioned seat, and contemplated his
navel, which is disgusting.  I've seen better navels on oranges.
     Leeta seems quite pleased with my favorites, and I will probably be running in
Andorak, which is good.  I worry about Dain Bramage, he needs somebody to look after
him, you know.  He's so good-natured that people take advantage of him.

                                        Daisy January

                                      SPY REPORT

     The sages err'd not in their foretelling of a god descending upon TOBIR, for I, 
Novgorodny Vir, have returned!  Practice pays for CATKILLER, who pummelled UNGER THE 
OGRE, to pocket 21 points.  Win some, lose some.  Speaking of which, CATKILLER was 
winsome, after beating UNGER THE OGRE and seeing him lose 16 points.  DAISY JANUARY 
found out being TOBIR's Duelmaster isn't all nuts and berries, receiving 2 
challenges!  You could cut the tension with a scimitar as CONAN of THE DEATH SQUAD 
met the Duelmaster.  CONAN found out that TOBIR isn't a democracy.  You've gotta be 
the best to be Duelmaster here!  Word has it one team in TOBIR is taking speech 
lessons to try to bore their opponent to death.  I'll bet it works.   
     And how sociable are TOBIR's warriors?  Come, let us see.  To quell some nasty 
rumors, the guys in THE DEATH SQUAD are not carrying any incurable diseases.  No need 
to avoid 'em.  Like a pup with its tail between its legs, DELIVERANCE scurried away 
from THE DEATH SQUAD.  Oh, the shame!   
     The moving sword slashes, and having slashed, moves on...  Ask not a spymaster 
for counsel, for he will pontificate long after you have fallen into an unconscious 
     Leave me now, you base fools!  My fingers tire and I fear my incessant prattling 
may cause unfair judgement upon my impeccable character.  TOBIR, I leave you now.  
The Duelmaster has agreed to foot my bill at The Deeproot Inn.  'Til next time-- 
Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CONAN 3986                   11  11  0    87       THE DEATH SQUAD (63)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LIVING DEAD GIRL 4077         7   0  1    81       THE DEATH SQUAD (63)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ATROPHY 4034                  8   4  1    66       THE DEATH SQUAD (63)
 JUNKYARD MUTT 3936           14  20  2    64       THE DOGHOUSE (188)
 SOLLY BILL 3998              14  10  0    59       THE DOGHOUSE (188)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 YETI 4025                     6  11  1    30       DELIVERANCE (33)
 VICTIM 4033                   7   7  1    29       DELIVERANCE (33)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PRITHEE 4092                  3   2  1    23       DELIVERANCE (33)
 RAPINE 4091                   4   1  1    22       DELIVERANCE (33)
 CATKILLER 4109                1   0  0    21       THE DOGHOUSE (188)
 10% VIGORISH 4108             1   1  0    15       THE DEATH SQUAD (63)
 BOWSER 4096                   1   4  0     7       THE DOGHOUSE (188)
 JOHN Q. PUBLIC 4102           1   3  0     6       THE DEATH SQUAD (63)
 UNGER THE OGRE 4103           1   1  0     4       DELIVERANCE (33)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
TRUSTWORTHY SCRIB 496  0  1 0   1                   PRITHEE 4092          467 NONE    
BOOMSLANG 3999         8  8 0 THE DEATH SQUAD 63    LADY DOROTHY 2957     463 REVENGED
LEGOLAS 4078           1  2 0 THE FELLOWSHIP 416    RAPINE 4091           464 REVENGED

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Conan -- This is some kind of payback, isn't it?  Just because I laugh every time I
look at you and someone says your name.  But hey, I always laugh at jokes! -- Solly
Bill the suicidally humorous

Living Dead Girl -- (whine, whimper) -- Junkyard Mutt

Living Dead Girl -- He didn't know what to make of you, dear.  It's the bones. --

Khalhums Dwarf?  Pooh. -- Tiger Jim

Rapine -- Hey!  Don't DO that!  I'm not a proper, um, target. -- Bowser

Victim -- This is true. -- Tiger Jim

26 June 2003
All -- Would you be willing to proxy my lunger Ganglare at the Face-to-Face?  He's
fighting in the champions tourney.  Thanks.  Write:  Michael Rogers #25335-013, PO
Box 6000, Florence, Co 81226 -- Skullagrim

     STOP THINKING TOGS!!!!!  It's here.  Well, almost here anyway.  We're looking at
a start date of the first turn in Aradi (DM 60) following the Fall Mail-In.  This
should give everyone sufficient time to study the new ultra-improved T#%S IV rules 
and prep accordingly.  So without further ado, here is your handy-dandy guide to
winning your very own Golden Scrod (and some other very cool prizes to be announced
officially before the start of the tourney that must not be named):
1.  Each T#%S team consists of two managers.  After the tourney starts, there will be
    no switching partners whatsoever, so choose your partners wisely.  T#%S IV will
    last for 13 turns, so pick a partner you can stand for 6 months or so.  The only
    team I know of so far is last TOGS winners:  Ganolus Oakleaf/Hombre of Blood
    Related/Thieves Guild.  Hey, this is fun!
2.  The T#%S entry fee is 2 team setups per manager.  This means 4 setups per T#%S
    team.  This entry fee is required before the start of the tourney with no
    exceptions being made.  This is to ensure that nobody gets screwed if a team or
    manager decides to back out early.  To pay the entry fee either:
    a) send $10 cash/check/money order/ or whatever to me personally at:
       Andy Salveson
       6812 Romanzo Way
       Elk Grove, CA 95758
    b) get RSI to send me 2 team setup gift certificates.  Sorry, no credit cards and
       no old teams you have lying around will be accepted.
3.  T#%S point system:
    10 points for winning on your up-challenge against another T#%S warrior.
    7 points for winning on your even challenge of another T#%S warrior.
    7 points for winning on another T#%S warriors challenge.
    7 points for winning a random matchup against another T#%S warrior.
    4 points for winning on your down-challenge of another T#%S warrior.
    4 points for winning a random matchup against a non-T#%S warrior.  Do not fight
      your team mate, you will not get any points.  Also, you will not get any points
      if you challenge or get challenged by a non-T#%S team, so use your avoids
      wisely if you think someone is out to get you.
   10 points for being the Duelmaster.  This is in addition to all points listed
      above and will begin turn 1, so prep accordingly.
    5 points for every spotlight written by any team member, 1 per manager per turn.
      The minimum length of a spotlight to receive points is 1/2 column in the
      newsletter (that's 31 lines-each line 85 characters across) and I will be
      completely firm on this.  In addition to the length criteria, spotlights will
      not be given points if they are in any way plagiarized or if they are not
      Duelmasters or fantasy related.  I will be the sole judge of this.  If you're
      unsure if I will judge something to be Duelmasters or fantasy related, then
      e-mail me before you write the spotlight and ask me.  I reserve the right to
      take points away from a spotlight after they are given if I judge at a later
      time that the spotlight has been plagiarized.
   -5 points per manager per turn every time a manager does not at least write one
      personal ad.
   -5 points for being the team that avoided the most.
     If you participated in TOGS III, you'll notice some slight changes in the points
structure.  The main things are points for random match ups against non T#%S
warriors, bonus points for being the Duelmaster, new spotlight criteria, and no
points given for being the most avoided team.
4.  I already mentioned this, but T#%S IV will start the first turn in arena 60 after
    the Fall Mail-In runs and it will last for 13 turns.  There will not be a
    Survivor format this time around, meaning no eliminations.  I will still be doing
    the multipliers at the end, however.  This means that all points accumulated by a
    team on turns 10 and 11 will be multiplied by 1.5 and all points accumulated by
    each team on turns 12 and 13 will be multiplied by 2.
5.  Prizes are yet to be determined, but I'll tell you what I know.  There will be
    prizes given out each turn to whichever team scores the most combined points on a
    given turn.  Tie breakers will go to the team with the most wins on that turn and
    then to the team with most overall points.  I have asked RSI for the same prizes
    as last TOGS which were transferring any warrior to arena 60 and renaming Aradi
    for approximately 6 months, but we'll see what they come back with.  I haven't
    decided how to split the prizes up, partly because I don't know how many teams
    will be entering yet, but I do know the prizes will be split among the top 3
    teams at the end.  I will announce the exact breakdown of everything when I know
6.  And just like TOGS III, Death Stud and I will be the sole arbiters of any dispute
    that may arise.  Whine all you like, but as Nuln told you last time, that's how
    it is.
7.  M & RR Clause (go ahead, read between the capitals):  I reserve the right to
    disallow entry to this tourney if you have a previous history of being a big fat
    mouth about everything.
     I think that pretty much covers it.  I will be accepting team entries as of now
and then posting them in the newsletters as I receive entry fees.  Please feel free
to e-mail me regarding any questions or comments at Ganolus@aol.com.  So everyone don
your best pair of leg warmers, hop on your favorite farm animal, and ride to Aradi
for the 4th kinda-annual Tournament that must not be named for no apparent reason
whatsoever, or T#%S IV, for short.  See ya'll there!

-- Ganolus Oakleaf, T#%S IV Commish

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

CONAN was devastated by DAISY JANUARY in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
LIVING DEAD GIRL vanquished SOLLY BILL in a exciting 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.
ATROPHY overpowered JUNKYARD MUTT in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge duel.
JOHN Q. PUBLIC was bested by RAPINE in a 2 minute novice's Challenge fight.
10% VIGORISH demolished BOWSER in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition.
VICTIM was overpowered by CHEERFUL FAN in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
YETI bested FRATSFAN NOBLE in a 2 minute competition.
PRITHEE slew TRUSTWORTHY SCRIBE in a action packed 2 minute beginner's melee.
UNGER THE OGRE was vanquished by CATKILLER in a 1 minute one-sided duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         PARRY-STRIKE       8 -   4 -  2      67  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         WALL OF STEEL     19 -  11 -  1      63  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         AIMED BLOW         7 -   5 -  1      58  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         STRIKING ATTACK   10 -   8 -  1      56  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         LUNGING ATTACK    14 -  12 -  1      54  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   1         TOTAL PARRY        7 -   7 -  2      50  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      9 -   9 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         PARRY-LUNGE        4 -   5 -  1      44  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         SLASHING ATTACK    8 -  12 -  1      40  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         BASHING ATTACK     9 -  15 -  1      38  |

Turn 467 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         1 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         2  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  2         2  WALL OF STEEL  
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  1     BASHING ATTACK     0 -  1         1  BASHING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      2 -  1                                       1  AIMED BLOW     
PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  1                                       1  TOTAL PARRY    
                                                                1  PARRY-STRIKE   
                                                                1  LUNGING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       ATROPHY 4034                8   4  1   66 THE DEATH SQUAD (63)
WALL OF STEEL    SOLLY BILL 3998            14  10  0   59 THE DOGHOUSE (188)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is SOLLY BILL 3998.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was PRITHEE 4092.  The ten other most popular fighters were LIVING DEAD GIRL 4077, 
3998, JOHN Q. PUBLIC 4102, JUNKYARD MUTT 3936, and BOWSER 4096.

The least popular fighter this week was UNGER THE OGRE 4103.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were YETI 4025, VICTIM 4033, BOWSER 4096, JUNKYARD MUTT 3936, JOHN 
Q. PUBLIC 4102, SOLLY BILL 3998, CONAN 3986, CATKILLER 4109, 10% VIGORISH 4108, and 
RAPINE 4091.

The following warriors have traveled to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after fighting this turn: