DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER Date : 04/12/2004 Duedate: 04/24/2004 ALJAFIR ARENA DM-17 TURN-482 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS TORLYN UNA MIDDLE WAY (484) (17-6288) [19-17-1,113] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader TORLYN UNA POSITION IS EMPTY MIDDLE WAY (484) (17-6288) [19-17-1,113] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite MOUSE NOYLE TORLYN UNA MIDDLE WAY (484) MIDDLE WAY (484) (17-6252) [18-24-0,90] (17-6288) [19-17-1,113] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. KINDRED OF KAOS (213) 45 2. MIDDLE WAY (484) 14 HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475) 3. SPECIAL ED (499) 7 Unchartered Team 4. LET'S DUEL! (519) 0 5. FISH THANGS (505) 0 (169) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1/ 1 HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475) 186 146 6 56.0 1/ 1 HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475) 9 6 0 2- 2 DELTA DOOM (492) 100 79 6 55.9 2/ 3 MIDDLE WAY (484) 6 9 0 3/ 0 SPECIAL ED (499) 192 166 7 53.6 3/ 0 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) 4 0 0 4/ 4 DEITIES & DEMIGODS (507) 35 32 2 52.2 4- 2 DELTA DOOM (492) 4 4 0 5- 5*LET'S DUEL! (519) 16 15 0 51.6 5- 4*LET'S DUEL! (519) 2 1 0 6/ 0 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) 264 304 21 46.5 6- 5 FISH THANGS (505) 2 2 0 7- 6 FISH THANGS (505) 14 22 0 38.9 7/ 7 DEITIES & DEMIGODS (507) 1 3 0 8/ 7 MIDDLE WAY (484) 163 282 3 36.6 8/ 0 SPECIAL ED (499) 0 1 0 '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank TEAM SPOTLIGHT >)]H[(< + -----:----- + >)] The Free Cities #79 [(< + -----:----- + >)]H[(< Near Barikala: The pillar of light over Barikala was not an attack in any obvious way, but Artemisia found no comfort in that. It was probably magical. No, it was definitely magical. No one had been able to explain it in the months, the years since the Invasion, but they'd figured out that early on. Well, what else could it be? And it, or something connected to it, was deadly dangerous, because no ship or single visitor had returned from Barikala after the pillar first appeared. Those ship captains who normally used Zukal's port had long since worked out the limits of safety in the waters around Barikala, and The Golden Moon was well outside that limit. But...the zombies were something new on the chart. A man screamed behind her, along the ship's other rail, and she whirled. There was movement beyond the rail, black on near black, hard to make out. Lanterns lit the ship's deck but cast no significant light beyond it. She could see one of her sailors staggering toward the rail with some kind of dark cable wrapped around the middle of his body, but not what lay beyond and pulled him. She didn't need to see. She crossed to that side of the deck, her cutlass whistling down on the cable. The blade bit, but not deeply, the cable was more rubbery than a normal rope. It wasn't a rope, of course. She saw with disgust rather than fear that it was a tentacle, though what creature would have a tentacle four inches thick at any point was not something she cared to think deeply about. The Lady Protector hacked downward again. There were more cries. Fear, loathing, terror. More tentacles reaching up and over the ship's side. Tentacles on one side of the ship, zombies on the other. Neither group of sailors could abandon their own task to aid the other. Both attacking forces were stronger than Artemisia had expected. She began to wonder if her crew and her ship would survive at all. Niatoli Island: Lord Protector Ghenis walked along the waterfront of the island's only real town and looked over the shipping on hand. He wasn't sure what he was looking for, but he figured he'd know it when he saw it. Some people might have taken him for a tourist and considered robbing him, or selling him the kind of trash that hustlers always sold to strangers and rubes, but...not here. This town had an arena, and they knew that kind of walk, that assured and dangerous stance. He could be a hick with hay growing out his ears, but as long as he was a Lord Protector, no one would mistreat him so. At least, no one but another Lord Protector. And since he wasn't such a hick.... He smiled, a baring of his teeth that drove human rats out of his path. Ah. There was a man on the street ahead of him, talking to a probably ship captain. A man who, like himself, was unmistakably a Lord Protector. Tall, hard, maybe not quite human, although Ghenis couldn't put his finger firmly on the difference. Something in the way he stood, maybe. Not that it matter. This looked like a man he could work with. When the man turned away from the sailor, Ghenis was there, nodding his head in a move as close to a bow as he ever got. "I'm Ghenis, from Zukal," he said, and raised a questioning eyebrow. The other frowned. Odd, at this close distance, he seemed almost...scaled. "Agro, Lapur," the man said shortly. Ghenis noted that the sailor was moving away, clearly dissociating himself from the two gladiators. "I have control of a ship," Ghenis said, "and I am minded to make a raid on the invaders at Monuntial. You look like a man who might be interested in that." Agro's frown deepened, but he smiled, baring pointed, over-large teeth. "I'm interested," he agreed. Rocanis: Lady Protector Eleven Blade, Leven to her friends, stood on Spirit Ridge and stared southward. What should have been rolling, increasingly arid grasslands to the distant horizon was now a bank of...fog, maybe. Dark, sharp as a wall at its base, the top of it working like porridge boiling in a pot. And no more than fifteen miles away, probably less. Ten. "I've never seen anything like it," she admitted. "Strange weather...if it is weather." "It's partly weather," her companion said slowly, "but not entirely." He was a Lord Protector from Morya, Ghost Dancer by name. "I have been studying it for two months now. It began...I don't know where. Somewhere in the far south. It was a hundred miles south of here when I first saw it." Leven glanced at the man sharply. She didn't really know him, but there was nothing in his face or manner that suggested he was lying. "It's moved ninety miles in two months? At that rate, it could be on Rocanis within a week!" "Its speed is irregular," Ghost Dancer said. "Some days it moved scarcely a mile, other days it raced north like wildfire. But yes, it could be on Rocanis... any time." He was silent for a moment, as though debating whether he should say more. With a faint shrug, he went on, "I have not been able to find an end to the line of it and get around behind. I have no idea what lies behind in the ground it has already covered. But I would not expect to find anything really GOOD where that has passed." Obviously not, Leven agreed silently. The unknown never seemed to be benevolent. It was probably a natural law. "You couldn't get around an end," she said. "Did you try going straight through?" Ghost Dancer paled a little. "Yes," he said very quietly. "I survived, but I didn't get very far into it. Or I would never have come back, I think. It was like being caught in a whirlwind, in part. But I was not the only thing in the grip of the walking storm, and the others were.... Some of them were beasts, mad with terror and striking blindly. Others were," he hesitated, "things. The sort of things a priest of the Mytori might call out of the Darkness." "Do you believe it's a natural phenomenon?" Eleven Blade asked. "No." "Good. If it's unnatural, it was made by men. Or something like men, anyway. And what men can make, they can undo. Let's find out how, and then...undo." DUELMASTER'S COLUMN Notes from the arena champ. It just seems wrong that I will only spend one turn on Aljafir's throne. Don't get me wrong--I am happy to graduate. Can you believe I actually had a losing record for a while? I am Judge's third slasher to graduate, but first slasher to graduate from this fine arena. I hope to change this trend in ADM. I am pretty excited about my favorite weapon, the scimitar. I will probably fight as an immortal contender in the tourney. Wish me luck. Your Duelmaster, Lord Protector Tiberious SPY REPORT If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of ALJAFIR brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too. Of course, we're all terribly impressed to see DIRTY OLD MAN win a fight and gain 17 points, terribly. Tsk, tsk, DIRTY OLD MAN beat KARO LEE and KARO LEE lost 11 points. You're breakin' my heart. And it's out with the old, in with the new, as TORLYN UNA takes the Title and last week's bar tab from the old Duelmaster. Heh, heh. The Vile Vizier, humph! I've tasted better ale at mortuaries. Where do they get this stuff? From ALJAFIR's trash dumps? Well, let's take a look at some more misdeeds of you miserable sword-boys. ALJAFIR, I am losing what little hope I had in you. MIDDLE WAY the most avoided team? What insult will suffice, I cannot say. And it looks like HEROESANDFOUNDONES avoided them the most this turn. What a pack of would be losers, if you ask me. Hmph. Ah, now we come to my favorite part, where we see all the guys who are dead and gone, and get to see if their team cared. Honor is like a chainmail shirt, it only shines through use. Certain nameless cowards will doubtless rebuke me on this one. What does the ALJAFIR arena have in common with the inns? It's just as comfortable to sleep in either place. Ha ha ha ha! Well, I've had enough of this drivel, and I'm sure you have too. Off like a dirty shirt of padded leather. I see the crowds are getting restless, I must leave now-- Snide Clemens DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME TORLYN UNA 6288 19 17 1 113 MIDDLE WAY (484) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -CREME A. SHUN 6152 13 11 1 99 DELTA DOOM (492) DIRTY OLD MAN 6391 8 5 0 95 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME MOUSE NOYLE 6252 18 24 0 90 MIDDLE WAY (484) -DARK MAGICIAN 6417 7 1 0 84 LET'S DUEL! (519) KARO LEE 6133 14 38 0 80 MIDDLE WAY (484) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME OMG-STFU 6390 11 2 0 61 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) IDUN 6396 9 5 1 61 DEITIES & DEMIGODS (507) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME POOP IN A SOCK 6389 9 3 1 56 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) -CASS KETT 6546 5 3 0 48 DELTA DOOM (492) -FLUFFY SCULPIN 6575 3 1 0 43 FISH THANGS (505) NAPOLEON 6578 4 1 0 37 HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475) TABETA UNIS 6405 7 14 0 35 MIDDLE WAY (484) DARON EL 6414 7 13 0 34 MIDDLE WAY (484) -ELMER FLOOD 6574 3 1 0 34 DELTA DOOM (492) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -BLOWFISH 6262 3 3 0 33 FISH THANGS (505) -EXODIA! 6420 4 3 0 32 LET'S DUEL! (519) -DA 6564 2 1 1 25 SPECIAL ED (499) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME PURPLE HEART 6590 2 1 0 23 HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475) -LA JINN 6419 2 3 0 20 LET'S DUEL! (519) -ANHUR 6544 4 6 0 18 DEITIES & DEMIGODS (507) -GREY MOUSER 6290 1 4 0 16 DEITIES & DEMIGODS (507) GARBAGE HOUND 6571 1 0 0 13 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) -BARRACUDA 6547 1 0 0 13 FISH THANGS (505) -GEARFRIED 6573 2 2 0 9 LET'S DUEL! (519) THAT ZESTY TARD 6568 0 1 0 7 SPECIAL ED (499) -GRACEFUL CHARITY 6586 1 1 0 4 LET'S DUEL! (519) -TRASH 6588 1 1 0 4 DELTA DOOM (492) -SILKY SALMON 6537 0 4 0 4 FISH THANGS (505) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? JOSHUA 6595 0 1 0 HEROESANDFOUNDONE 475 HIGH ELF 644 482 NONE GHANDI 6594 0 1 0 HEROESANDFOUNDONE 475 DARK CHAMPION 649 482 NONE PERSONAL ADS Khan -- Dog gone it, finally look like I'm going to take you out and I forgot my damn backup weapon. Oh well, congrats on graduating. -- Creme Tabeta -- Gumbo, don't know about cooking it, but I can damn sure eat it! -- Cass Pip -- Wow, your presence is overwhelming. Dude, your teams look better in here now than they have in a long time. You've really slowed those losses down! -- Barnabas Pipster -- Hope you ran this turn like you said you were, oh no, wait a minute, that's what you've been doing, running! Well bro, if you did don't be surprised if I didn't whoop you down again. I do miss all those easy wins. -- Barnabas Judge -- Again, I ask if you don't beat Pip down to bad, need to try and keep him in here for my guys seem to learn a ton off his guys, and win too. Thanks. -- Barnabas Fluffy Sculpin -- You don't look like a fish to ME. I think you're some kind of spy. -- Daron El, feeling paranoid Blowfish -- May you blow up till you pop. -- Tabeta Unis But the Kung-Fu Master would have looked GOOD buried in the sand! -- Torlyn Una Tiberious -- Mouse hater! You think just because you're a DWARF, you can SCARE me. But I'm not so easy, oh, no! I am a Mouse of COURAGE. Step ONE FOOT into my alley, and you're cat food! -- Mouse Noyle Idun -- Wrong kind of apples, sorry. Golden Delicious are just not my piece of pie. -- Karo Lee Trash -- I love taking out the trash. -- Purple Heart Mouse Noyle -- You've got to know when to hold them, know when to fold them. I love taking your money at the poker table (and your cheese). -- Tiberious Roll-up Gods -- I hereby offer up two worthy sacrifices: Ghandi and Joshua. May they bring me roll-ups with wits greater than 10. Please tell me that I will not get two more roll-ups with starting wits of 5. Are you guys mad at me? -- Judge *pointed silence* -- RUG 485 18 March 2004 St. Valentine's Day Massacre Update We are pleased to announce that the kLk sponsored St. Valentine's Day Massacre kill contest in DM 36 is off to a great start. We are also pleased to announce that in addition to the 10 team rollups we are also able to offer the renaming of a dark arena warrior as a prize to the manager with the most kills. The contest is only 2 turns old and is still wide open. There are currently 5 managers tied with one kill each. Anything can still happen so hurry up and get into the arena. On a personal note, no other alliances have entered the arena in force to challenge the kLk dominance. We were expecting The Firm to put up a fight for their supposed home arena. But, they were a no show. Guess they proved what they are really made of. *evil grin* Perhaps another alliance would like to step in to give us a challenge. We are throwing down the gauntlet. Perhaps the Chaos Inc. boys I keep hearing about would like to step in and challenge the kLk for arena dominance. If you don't show up, Chaos, don't feel bad. FAR better managers than you have been invited into Jhans but have chosen to pass on the offer. So if you consider yourself worthy to compete, like fierce competition, and enjoy arenas where the personals are as fierce as the fighting, come visit JHANS DM 36. We're already planning our next contest, "Capture the Flag," and have a storyline being actively worked on in the arena. Whatever you like about DM you can find it in JHANS. Bookie mgr. of Suicidal Dreams and Director Jhans Board of Tourism kLk Alliance 27 March 2004 This notice is to inform the DM world that CHAOS INC. has added CHEETO to its ranks. He joins APEX, FLAGG, MATRIX, ASSAMITE, and RUDE BUDDHA as the 6th member. May your chaotic wings spread disaster and CHAOS for all your days! Welcome CHEETO!! 27 March 2004 Has anyone seen it in print that the "Goat" is leaving the "Cartel"? There were some diplos to the effect of a special branch of the Cartel being formed, like secret societies, governmental agencies and alliances certain agendas are developed. To obtain the desired effect of any agenda only key personnel can be used. The "Goat" is "Cartel" so until you see it with me announcing that I am not Cartel, remember, "The Agenda of the Core is for you to fight for." I hope this stops the confusion. -- Goat 8 April 2004 CLICK (KLK) -- Remember, you asked for it. Chaos is coming.... LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS JOSHUA was butchered by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight. GHANDI was butchered by DARK CHAMPION in a 2 minute brutal Dark Arena duel. TIBERIOUS was overcome by TORLYN UNA in a 2 minute veteran's Title match. KARO LEE was vanquished by DIRTY OLD MAN in a 1 minute mismatched brawl. MOUSE NOYLE overpowered IDUN in a 2 minute bloody one-sided fight. TABETA UNIS was bested by NAPOLEON in a 1 minute veteran vs. amateur upset duel. OMG-STFU overpowered THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a 1 minute mismatched brawl. POOP IN A SOCK savagely defeated DARON EL in a action packed 1 minute gruesome melee. PURPLE HEART vanquished THAT ZESTY TARD in a 1 minute one-sided duel. GARBAGE HOUND vanquished CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided duel. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |SLASHING ATTACK 4 PARRY-STRIKE 9 - 6 - 0 60 | |LUNGING ATTACK 2 TOTAL PARRY 18 - 13 - 1 58 | |STRIKING ATTACK 2 STRIKING ATTACK 12 - 9 - 1 57 | |WALL OF STEEL 2 PARRY-RIPOSTE 14 - 13 - 0 52 | |TOTAL PARRY 2 SLASHING ATTACK 28 - 28 - 2 50 | |PARRY-STRIKE 1 LUNGING ATTACK 17 - 18 - 0 49 | |PARRY-LUNGE 1 PARRY-LUNGE 5 - 7 - 0 42 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 WALL OF STEEL 8 - 12 - 0 40 | |BASHING ATTACK 1 AIMED BLOW 3 - 5 - 0 38 | |AIMED BLOW 0 BASHING ATTACK 2 - 7 - 0 22 | Turn 482 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: PARRY-STRIKE 1 - 0 SLASHING ATTACK 1 - 3 3 SLASHING ATTACK LUNGING ATTACK 2 - 0 AIMED BLOW 0 - 0 2 LUNGING ATTACK STRIKING ATTACK 2 - 0 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 1 2 WALL OF STEEL WALL OF STEEL 2 - 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 1 2 TOTAL PARRY BASHING ATTACK 0 - 1 2 STRIKING ATTACK TOTAL PARRY 0 - 2 TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME LUNGING ATTACK TORLYN UNA 6288 19 17 1 113 MIDDLE WAY (484) WALL OF STEEL OMG-STFU 6390 11 2 0 61 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) TOTAL PARRY IDUN 6396 9 5 1 61 DEITIES & DEMIGODS (507) STRIKING ATTACK POOP IN A SOCK 6389 9 3 1 56 KINDRED OF KAOS (213) PARRY-STRIKE NAPOLEON 6578 4 1 0 37 HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is MOUSE NOYLE 6252. The most popular warrior this turn was TORLYN UNA 6288. The ten other most popular fighters were MOUSE NOYLE 6252, POOP IN A SOCK 6389, DIRTY OLD MAN 6391, NAPOLEON 6578, OMG-STFU 6390, PURPLE HEART 6590, GARBAGE HOUND 6571, GHANDI 6594, IDUN 6396, and JOSHUA 6595. The least popular fighter this week was THAT ZESTY TARD 6568. The other ten least popular fighters were DARON EL 6414, TABETA UNIS 6405, KARO LEE 6133, JOSHUA 6595, IDUN 6396, GHANDI 6594, GARBAGE HOUND 6571, PURPLE HEART 6590, OMG-STFU 6390, and NAPOLEON 6578. The following warriors have traveled to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after fighting this turn: TIBERIOUS (17-6209) HEROESANDFOUNDONES (475)