DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 03/17/2014    Duedate: 03/29/2014

TALCAMA ARENA

DM-18    TURN-740

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

DIP
CENTER FOR OLDS (108)
(18-10267) [19-20-0,96]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

DIP                            RAIN MAN
CENTER FOR OLDS (108)          THE MENTORS (609)
(18-10267) [19-20-0,96]        (18-8344) [6-2-0,57]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

DIP                            TOO SUAVE
CENTER FOR OLDS (108)          STREET PIZZA (106)
(18-10267) [19-20-0,96]        (18-9338) [7-8-0,38]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

STREET PIZZA (106)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. 4-LETTER WORDS (706)        26
2. HIP HOP HEROES (511)        22      NEXT GENERATION (547)
3. CENTER FOR OLDS (108)       22      Unchartered Team
4. BEEFCAKES (704)             18
5. STREET PIZZA (106)          11      THE MENTORS (609)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 NEXT GENERATION (547)    254 151 11 62.7   1/ 2 STREET PIZZA (106)        7  2 0
 2/ 3 4-LETTER WORDS (706)     194 128  9 60.2   2/ 1 NEXT GENERATION (547)     5  3 0
 3- 4 ANIMAL PHARM (533)        85  63  6 57.4   3/ 6 4-LETTER WORDS (706)      4  2 0
 4/ 2*THE MENTORS (609)         16  12  1 57.1   4- 3 ANIMAL PHARM (533)        4  4 0
 5/ 6 WASTELAND (207)          734 699 43 51.2   5/ 5*THE MENTORS (609)         4  7 0
 6/ 7 CENTER FOR OLDS (108)    %1408 %1357 78 50.9   6/ 4*STONE COLD (713)          3  5 0
 7/ 8 STREET PIZZA (106)       782 829 56 48.5   7/ 8 HIP HOP HEROES (511)      3  7 0
 8/10 HIP HOP HEROES (511)      68  85  5 44.4   8/10 WASTELAND (207)           2  1 0
 9/11 BEEFCAKES (704)           17  26  0 39.5   9/ 7 BEEFCAKES (704)           2  1 0
10/ 9*STONE COLD (713)           5   8  0 38.5  10/11 CENTER FOR OLDS (108)     1  2 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

This was last cycle's Duelmaster's column...  which Hal misplaced...

     Whether the pulsing lights were fireflies or fireworks they were viewed through
the thickest Star Trek glamour-filter, an extra glop of Vaseline, smeared on the lens
in the darkness.  Voices echoed in the distance, coming closer and growing in
clarity.  It was the threshold where you are aware you're dreaming, and you can't put
the jelly back in the donut.  Well, you could put the jelly back in a donut, but it
would really be unappetizing at that point, the dough part would get all smeared with
the jelly, it would look like a patch-job.  Gross.  But, a donut sure sounds...
     A rumble rose and fell as the voices sharpened Footsteps?  Furtive efforts
making way for all out assault on the target.
     "Daddy?"
     A volley of incredible intensity.  This was narrowly defended, but the crumbling
gates of sweet Sleepintonville, could not withstand a prolonged siege.  Gentle
pressure on the atmosphere around him, a rustling of cloudy shrouds, and then a
direct hit, small hand patting his forehead softly.
     "Daddy, I'm hungry."
     Disinterment protocol initiated.
     "Can you get a banana?"
     A squinty-eyed smirk covers her face.  "I'd like toast, please.'
     "Okay."
     She lays against the bed.  "I love you."
     "I love you," he replied, smiling.  "So, what's the weather like?"
     "Rainy."
     "Eh, well, maybe it'll clear up later and you can ride your new bike.  But, you
know..."
     "I've already filled out the DA guys, I know, 'Rainy days are strategy
days(tm)'."
     "Yes.  What about... whoever, the new LU."
     "I sent it, too.  No rolls."
     "So annoying."
     "Well, you went with deftness over my objections, that's pretty 10 years ago,"
She said, planting her palm on his forehead and giving a gentle shove, "from what I
hear, at least."
     "Mmmm-hrmmm.  Well, it already had enough points where they needed to be, don't
you wag your finger at me.  I can't help let sentimentality get the better of me from
time to time.  Don't make me take your Frozen(tm) DVD away for the rest of the
weekend."
     "Dad!" and a punch to the shoulder.
     "Where's the party today?" I asked, teasingly.
     "At the ice rink, duh!  I can't wait!  And you know what?  Sophia is going to be
there too because her birthday is next week!"
     "Wow, her birthday is close to yours.  How old is she going to be?"
     "Dad, she's in my class, so she's seven, too," she said with her eyebrows
raised, looking over some imaginary bifocals.
     "Oh, right," I smiled.  "Toast?"
     "Yes! and some eggs?" flashing puppy-dog eyes.
     "Cool, you can do Jhans while I cook."
     Hint of a blank stare.
     "Okay, and I've also been thinking about names for the Frozen(tm) team you said
I could rename from one of your teams."
     "We'll talk."

     Mr. Animal, Manray Frothingslosh and Co.
     (note:  No children were harmed in the writing of the column.  Any similarities
to actual people, events or managerial decision making procedures are purely 
coincidental.)

P.S.  Nice to be back, small note of irony that I get marched off to the DA and then
turn around and challenge a fine warrior in R-1 for the throne, and pull out a close
fight.  Flying under the radar a bit, I believe, having just returned.  Looking
forward to the competition here in Talcama, a legendary place.  Of which I'm proud to
be your DM.  Until next time...

     Barracudafed

       * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                               ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                              Duelmasters
                                              -----------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 749): WYRTHA of SWEORDMASTERS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 631): MAUL ON WHEELS of THE RUNAROUND (Howlin' Wolf, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 754): JURY DUTY of MAJOR BUMMER (Coach, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 726): PINP POTENTIAL of DEVIATION (Marma Duke, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 750): BLACK DEATH of DUNGEON CELL (One Armed Bandit, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 745): JUGGERNAUT of MACHINES OF WAR (Hollowshade, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 753): WAVIN' WANDA of BEACH BABES (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 738): SALTY DOG of THIRSTY THUGS (DMobster, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 739): CRUSH THE DOCTOR of NEXT GENERATION (Assurnasirbanipal)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 738): JACK B.  QUICK of ALL JACKED UP II (Pat Sajak, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 704): BLOOD THIRSTER of VOW TO DESTROY (Hollowshade, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 693): DIRTY DIAPERS of BASH BROS CHILDREN (Assurnasirbanipal)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 322): MALICE of DARQUE ANGELS (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 686): STUD of DEALER'S CHOICE (Coach, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 637): MOONDARK of DARK HORSEMEN (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 304): DESERT PEARL of TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 297): JOHNNY APPLESEED of TALL TALES (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 583): MILKY WAYNE of GARBAGE PAIL KIDS (Kharadmon, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 273): FREELOADER of BASH BROS FRIEND (Assurnasirbanipal)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 631): TOLAIS DEEPHEART of HIGHLANDERS (She-Puppy, mgr.)

                                               Top Teams
                                               ---------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 749): SWEORDMASTERS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 631): THE RUNAROUND (Howlin' Wolf, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 754): FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 726): DEVIATION (Marma Duke, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 750): BIG SHOTS (Howlin' Wolf, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 745): MEDAL OF HONOR Y2 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 753): SENTINELS (Nomad, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 738): THIRSTY THUGS (DMobster, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 739): NEXT GENERATION (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 738): THE CEREAL KILLERS (?, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 704): MEDAL OF HONOR J11 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 693): BASH BROS CHILDREN (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 322): DARQUE ANGELS (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 686): DEALER'S CHOICE (Coach, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 637): DARK HORSEMEN (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 304): TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 297): ELDER GODS (Var, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 583): GARBAGE PAIL KIDS (Kharadmon, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 273): BB INFOMERICAL (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 631) BRUTAL LEGION et al (Seraphim, mgr.)

                                           Recent Graduates
                                          -----------------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 749): TOBY WING of CHUCK'S PINUPS (Chuck, mgr.)
                                   BELLE BENNETT of CHUCK'S PINUPS (Chuck, mgr.)
                    (turn 748): RUN'S HOUSE of RUN DMC (Howlin' Wolf, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 631): MAUL ON WHEELS of THE RUNAROUND (Howlin' Wolf, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 753): MELONDARION NORIS of GAMES LIBRARY (Jorja, mgr.)
                                DUDE #1 of FRAT PARTY BLOWOUT (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 726): QUEEN OF COOL of DEVIATION (Marma Duke, mgr.)
                  (turn 725): BEAST MODE of DEVIATION (Marma Duke, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 745): JUGGERNAUT of MACHINES OF WAR (Hollowshade, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 752): GANNUCK of SENTINELS (Nomad, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 738): SALTY DOG of THIRSTY THUGS (DMobster, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 738): JACK B.  QUICK of ALL JACKED UP II (Pat Sajak, mgr.)
                  (turn 737): BELL of OMINOUS REIGN (Archaic Elf, mgr.)
                                 BONHAM of MASTERS OF MELODY (Dr.  Feelgood, mgr.)
                                 TORINO of NOMADIC TRIBE (Nomad, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 693): KORGENDAL FARS of JINDA-BAN (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 583): CLOWN CONFETTI of MAGIC INGREDIENTS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 272): SERVED of BASH BROS LAWYER (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Good day, friends and fiends, welcome to your friendly neighborhood spyreport.  
I doubt TALCAMA will ever be the same.  It seems the training can make the 
difference, as NEXT GENERATION is pushed out of top team by STREET PIZZA, who came 
from 2nd with a 2-1-0 this turn.  4-LETTER WORDS stable has parlayed this turn's 
2-0-0 into a 3 space move up the rankings.  This brings them up to 3rd place.  Good 
work, guys!  And let's see, ABCESS fought PICK HARD and gained 21 points and 
contributed to STREET PIZZA's 2-1-0.  PICK HARD has lost to ABCESS, falling 15 
points, while helping make NEXT GENERATION a 0-2-0 turn.  And all eyes were on DIP 
this turn as he ascended to the throne of Duelmaster.  TALCAMA has a new victor!  By 
the way, was that our Duelmaster that I saw last night, cramped under the table at 
The Original Arthur's Last Stand?   
     I tell you, a green quarterstaff lasts longer than a seasoned sapling.  A basher 
friend of mine assures me this is true.  I also notice that the CENTER FOR OLDS 
stable was the most avoided team this turn.  Come on TALCAMA, what are you afraid of? 
And avoiding CENTER FOR OLDS more than any other team we find NEXT GENERATION.  
TALCAMA, are we going to accept, or respect this sort of thing?  The most challenged 
warrior this turn was THE MENTORS' warrior CONFUSION.  More fighters challenged him 
than challenged the Duelmaster!  In a brave attempt, GRANITE from STONE COLD 
challenged up 21 points to fight SPOONIE G from the HIP HOP HEROES stable.  GRANITE 
perhaps got his just desserts, seeing as he was overcame by SPOONIE G and ended up 
with 28 recognition points.   
     The Dark Arena is for those who cannot win, not who cannot lose with grace.  
Dignity in life or death is the warrior's creed.  A brave warrior does not carry a 
red shield, he has nothing to cover or hide when the fight is over.  Consider well.   
     Thought for the day, a new sword shines bright, but the notched sword sings the 
sweetest.  Always good to rest in TALCAMA, but never good to wear out my welcome.  
Look for me in future turns.  Until you see my quill in TALCAMA again, farewell-- 
Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DIP 10267                    19  20  0    96       CENTER FOR OLDS (108)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-CRUSHING BRATZ 9153          12   5  1   147       NEXT GENERATION (547)
-PENGUINICILLIN 7224          15  15  1    97       ANIMAL PHARM (533)
-R-1 9490                     16   3  0    95       NEXT GENERATION (547)
-COUNSELOR OBVIOUS 10133      11   3  0    92       NEXT GENERATION (547)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-BARRACUDAFED 7627            12   7  2    90       ANIMAL PHARM (533)
 ABCESS 10356                 12   2  1    83       STREET PIZZA (106)
 CRUSH THE DOCTOR 9585        12   5  0    82       NEXT GENERATION (547)
 LOST 10360                   12   3  0    79       4-LETTER WORDS (706)
 HAMMER FINGER 10342          12   3  1    69       STREET PIZZA (106)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 YIPE! 10361                  10   5  1    62       4-LETTER WORDS (706)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PICK HARD 10134               7   2  0    62       NEXT GENERATION (547)
 SPOONIE G 10196              13  17  1    61       HIP HOP HEROES (511)
 RAIN MAN 8344                 6   2  0    57       THE MENTORS (609)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 STRAWBABERRY 10450            7   2  0    46       BEEFCAKES (704)
-ZOCORCUPINE 7882              6   1  0    43       ANIMAL PHARM (533)
-EXTRA PROTECTION #6 10439     5   1  0    41       BEEFCAKES (704)
-INNOCENT SPHINX 10466         4   0  0    41       WASTELAND (207)
 TOO SUAVE 9338                7   8  0    38       STREET PIZZA (106)
 SCOTT LA ROCK 10326           3   2  0    35       HIP HOP HEROES (511)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HOLY GUACAMOLE 10464          6   3  0    33       WASTELAND (207)
-OXYCONTIN-TAIL 7915           2   1  0    33       ANIMAL PHARM (533)
 EMOTICON 10309                3   1  0    29       THE MENTORS (609)
 GRANITE 10494                 3   1  0    28       STONE COLD (713)
-IT'S GO TIME 10443            2   3  0    26       WASTELAND (207)
-DA1 10205                     3   1  1    24       HIP HOP HEROES (511)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CONFUSION 8347                3   3  0    20       THE MENTORS (609)
-980-LB WEAKLING 10436         3   3  0    19       BEEFCAKES (704)
-POOL PARTY 10467              2   2  0     8       BEEFCAKES (704)
-ROWDY RODDY 10496             0   1  0     7       STONE COLD (713)
 COMMON 10519                  1   0  0     6       HIP HOP HEROES (511)
 BUSTA 10509                   0   1  0     1       THE MENTORS (609)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
DA1 10518               0  1 0 HIP HOP HEROES 511   WIRYDON THE GIAN      740  NONE
PEE WEE HERMAN 10520    0  1 0 STONE COLD 713       WIRYDON THE GIAN      740  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

This personal contains no information.  You need not read it.  It exists only to
convince hal that the critical parts of the newsletter are present and ready to
print.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

PEE WEE HERMAN was dealt death by WIRYDON THE GIANTESS in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
DA1 was dealt death by WIRYDON THE GIANTESS in a 1 minute brutal Dark Arena duel.
GRANITE was handily defeated by SPOONIE G in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
HOLY GUACAMOLE vanquished CONFUSION in a 2 minute gory mismatched Challenge brawl.
CRUSH THE DOCTOR was defeated by DIP in a 1 minute master's Title match.
PICK HARD was devastated by ABCESS in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
RAIN MAN was devastated by LOST in a crowd pleasing 1 minute mismatched match.
HAMMER FINGER overpowered SCOTT LA ROCK in a 1 minute uneven melee.
TOO SUAVE was viciously subdued by STRAWBABERRY in a action packed 3 minute gory duel.
YIPE! vanquished AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
EMOTICON overpowered PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 4 minute uneven match.
COMMON beat BUSTA in a 1 minute novice's fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         STRIKING ATTACK   28 -  11 -  2      72  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         PARRY-LUNGE       24 -  12 -  1      67  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         TOTAL PARRY        7 -   4 -  0      64  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         LUNGING ATTACK    22 -  17 -  0      56  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         SLASHING ATTACK   11 -   9 -  0      55  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    2         WALL OF STEEL      7 -   6 -  1      54  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  1         AIMED BLOW        18 -  25 -  1      42  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      1         BASHING ATTACK    11 -  25 -  0      31  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      4 -  14 -  0      22  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   2 -  0       0  |

Turn 740 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  0     AIMED BLOW         1 -  2         4  STRIKING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  2         2  PARRY-LUNGE    
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  0     BASHING ATTACK     1 -  2         1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  3         1  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                                                                1  SLASHING ATTACK
                                                                1  BASHING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-LUNGE      ABCESS 10356               12   2  1   83 STREET PIZZA (106)
STRIKING ATTACK  CRUSH THE DOCTOR 9585      12   5  0   82 NEXT GENERATION (547)
SLASHING ATTACK  LOST 10360                 12   3  0   79 4-LETTER WORDS (706)
BASHING ATTACK   YIPE! 10361                10   5  1   62 4-LETTER WORDS (706)
LUNGING ATTACK   RAIN MAN 8344               6   2  0   57 THE MENTORS (609)
AIMED BLOW       SCOTT LA ROCK 10326         3   2  0   35 HIP HOP HEROES (511)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is DIP 10267.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
TOO SUAVE 9338.  The ten other most popular fighters were HOLY GUACAMOLE 10464, 
STRAWBABERRY 10450, LOST 10360, COMMON 10519, SPOONIE G 10196, DIP 10267, HAMMER 
FINGER 10342, YIPE! 10361, PEE WEE HERMAN 10520, and DA1 10518.

The least popular fighter this week was BUSTA 10509.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were EMOTICON 10309, SCOTT LA ROCK 10326, PICK HARD 10134, CONFUSION 8347, 
GRANITE 10494, RAIN MAN 8344, ABCESS 10356, CRUSH THE DOCTOR 9585, DA1 10518, and PEE 
WEE HERMAN 10520.

               NEW GRADUATES--FROM ALL ARENAS (INCLUDING CLOSED ARENAS)

For those of you who keep track of such things, several additional warriors 
graduated from regular DM arenas (including closed arenas) since the last tournament. 

                         WILLOW (14-4754) ZOMBIE SQUAD (478) 
                      SERPENTITO (36-7542) SERPENTS HOLD (629) 
                     THE SHINING (82-1279) FAILED MUSICALS (222) 
                     BESS (82-35303) SUPERIOR FORCES 4502 (5816) 
                        JABBER HOGAN (82-49966) LAZY 9 (8398) 
                       LAZY CRIMINAL (84-18259) KAOSTIC (1429) 
                         HIDDEN GERBIL (84-19254) TMI (3416) 

Congrats to the grads. -- Green Eyes