DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER Date : 02/17/2005 Duedate: 03/02/2005 ZUWAYZA ARENA DM-19 TURN-503 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS SIT VALHALLA (344) (19-4228) [14-11-2,96] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader SIT JERRY ATTRICKS VALHALLA (344) FUNKY FOLK IV (405) (19-4228) [14-11-2,96] (19-4797) [4-2-0,28] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite WHITE WOLF SIT THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (241) VALHALLA (344) (19-3878) [9-15-0,45] (19-4228) [14-11-2,96] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (241) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. FUNKY FOLK IV (405) 39 2. VALHALLA (344) 36 BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) 3. JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) 19 Unchartered Team 4. ANARCHY (342) 0 5. BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) -4 FUNKY FOLK IV (405) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1/ 0 BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) 8 6 0 57.1 1/ 1 THE MAGNIFICENT MA (241) 9 6 0 2/ 1*FUNKY FOLK IV (405) 13 10 0 56.5 2/ 2 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) 6 8 1 3/ 2 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) 257 306 18 45.6 3/ 3*FUNKY FOLK IV (405) 4 2 0 4- 3 ANARCHY (342) 160 194 22 45.2 4/ 0 VALHALLA (344) 2 1 0 5/ 4 THE MAGNIFICENT MA (241) 269 362 12 42.6 5- 4 ANARCHY (342) 1 2 1 6/ 0 VALHALLA (344) 108 175 13 38.2 6/ 0 BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) 0 2 0 '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank SPY REPORT The sages err'd not in their foretelling of a god descending upon ZUWAYZA, for I, Novgorodny Vir, have returned! Say what you will about blind luck and dirty fighting, but FUNKY FOLK IV will tell you 13-10-0 is nothing to laugh at... FUNKY FOLK IV had cause to celebrate, after SANDY BEECH got 19 points by beating SPORTS III. WHITE WOLF certainly had a baffled expression on hers face, after losing to BHAGWANDASS and losing 10 points in the process! In ZUWAYZA, nothing is permanent (except Death), and we find ourselves a new Duelmaster, SIT. So who was the warrior seen charging into immovable walls and challenging dead trees? Someone's got a basic problem... And how sociable are ZUWAYZA's warriors? Come, let us see. Is it charming personality? Conversational abilities? Good oral hygiene? Whatever it is, (PLAIN WRAPPER) is the most challenged warrior. Like the wind whispering among the pines, do hearest I many disquieting rumors. The audience gave a nice round of rasberries to TRAVEL HOLIDAY of THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS, for expiring in such an ungraceful fashion. 5-4-0, indeed! Ask not a spymaster for counsel, for he will pontificate long after you have fallen into an unconscious stupor. Do not think spyreporting in ZUWAYZA is the highlight of my life. More important duties call me. Do not despair! I shall return!-- Novgorodny Vir DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME SIT 4228 14 11 2 96 VALHALLA (344) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME DING HAO 4750 9 3 2 91 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME ADARA AL ZAHRA 3989 22 13 0 87 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) DYER, RHEA 4181 7 3 0 69 BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME BHAGWANDASS 4595 5 3 0 66 VALHALLA (344) -GULF COAST D 4789 5 1 0 60 ANARCHY (342) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME VED BUENS ENDE 4749 6 6 3 53 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) WHITE WOLF 3878 9 15 0 45 THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (241) -SIMON'S REVENGE 4791 4 5 0 36 ANARCHY (342) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME JERRY ATTRICKS 4797 4 2 0 28 FUNKY FOLK IV (405) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -DAYNE JEROUS 4792 3 0 0 22 FUNKY FOLK IV (405) ELLE 4003 2 2 0 22 THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (241) (PLAIN WRAPPER) 4004 3 1 0 21 THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (241) DEO VOLENTE 4751 4 7 0 19 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) SANDY BEECH 4811 1 0 0 19 FUNKY FOLK IV (405) SFORNO OBADJA 4662 1 14 0 17 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) -HEAD, LOOSE 4801 1 0 0 13 BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) LIZA LOTT 4813 1 0 0 5 FUNKY FOLK IV (405) SPORTS III 4812 1 1 0 4 THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (241) -NORMALACY 4800 0 4 0 4 ANARCHY (342) B 4182 0 1 0 3 BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? LEE VIATHON 4810 0 1 0 FUNKY FOLK IV 405 SHEWISH GIANT 381 503 NONE TRAVEL HOLIDAY 3992 5 4 0 THE MAGNIFICENT M 241 VED BUENS ENDE 4749 503 VALTRON 4648 2 4 1 VALHALLA 344 SPYMASTER 382 503 NONE PERSONAL ADS Travel Holiday -- Don't know where Noachian gets our names. Sometimes it means something, most time it don't mean anything at all. Adara's name means flowering virgin or something like that. My name if anything, is probably a curse, 'cause I've lost 13 fights in a row after winning my first. -- Sforno Obadja White Wolf -- You are good. At least I lasted two minutes that time. I'm trying to get some insight to your strategy, so we'll fight again. -- Ved Buens Ende Convicted Assassin -- I bet he has never killed a fly. Not to say he isn't guilty of whatever crime he committed. He just can't kill a fly. -- Ding Hao Travel Holiday -- You are no holiday. You are a thief. Stealing precious skills from me. Now I've got to learn them all over again. -- Deo Volente (Plain Wrapper) -- I can't believe I lost to you. Is that like losing to a paper bag? I'd don't know why I'm still alive, I'm one of Noachian's experiments. He wants to see how long it'll take to graduate a really bad roll-up. So I'll be here until I graduate or one of you kills me. I'm hoping to get at least one more win before I graduate. -- Sforno Obadja Ved Buens Ende -- Well, *I* thought that was a buen ende! Thanks for losing, and thanks for not dying. I really don't want to decrease the arena population here. -- White Wolf Jerry Attricks -- (wincing) For an old guy, you're spry. -- Elle Sforno Obadja -- I must admit that I enjoyed that one, even if it wasn't kinky. -- (Plain Wrapper) Deo Volente -- Your height would make it very difficult to find you comfortable accommodations in any of the hotels on my list. Have you considered camping out? -- Travel Holiday P.S. True, that is a...not-luxurious sort of holiday, but some people aren't made for luxury. Poor ones, for instance. And the very, very tall. P.P.S. Change your train. Try the Denver & Rio Grande Western. The very, very tall do better in very, very luxurious places. It's the merely semi-luxurious places that have short beds. -- Ed., who has had to learn these things The Mordant Deserter's a Rirorni! Scum, that's what they are, nothing but scum. Barbarians and worse. He should be killed. -- Sports Ill. P.S. That should be Sports ILL (as in Illustrated). But is Jorja likely to correct it? Not much. P.P.S. WHAT!? My charisma is only AVERAGE, my attractiveness and courage are LOW, but I'm very TRUSTWORTHY? Gee, thanks, Commish. At least you recognized that I'm Cool. Mystic -- That's the way it goes out west. Dry-gulched by mistake. Oh, well. -- Ghost of Wild West Ryan -- It was just one of those things. No hard feelings then or now. -- Jorja Citizens of Alastari -- Like a mace to the back of the head, like a sudden shift of wind coming down from the outhouse, like an unexpected visit from the tax man, like a toothless smile of a 9 month-old who knows he just did a stinky in his diaper and YOU have to change it, I, Overlord Odin, oh so unexpectedly have returned to ruin your otherwise enjoyable pathetic lives!!! Hope you all enjoyed the lengthy reprieve from my ill temper, evil tongue, and wicked warriors. Because as of today, YOUR REPRIEVE IS OVER!!!! Gentlemen of this quaint village, say hello to your old buddy HAN SOLO. Because of now, all the lovelies will spending their evenings at the Halls Of Valhalla. Fathers, don't bother locking your daughters up cause they'll escape anyway. BECAUSE I, OVERLORD ODIN, HAVE RETURNED!!!! BBBWWWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! -- Odin, Valhalla Please note, while Jekyll may have been more lenient in his rule of this pathetic plane, I will not be so. I am here by reinstating all of the LAW OF THE OVERLORD. All filth ridden species on this plane will follow the following rules or forfeit their meaningless lives: Rule #1 -- When an Overlord or a Disciple comes within a person's eyesight, all beings must bow down on their knees. There is to be no more then a 3 inch space between the person's face and ground. Bowing too low or not low enough by even half an inch to the ground will result in a swift mace to the back of the head. Rule #2 -- All whiskey that has been aged beyond twenty years but not more then thirty-five years will be delivered to the Halls Of Valhalla immediately. The same goes for all wenches between those ages as well. Defiance of this rule will result in a swift mace to the back of the head. Rule #3 -- All cattle of good health, all hogs of good girth, and all fruit of good quality (I dislike vegetables, especially squash) will brought forth to the Halls Of Valhalla as tribute to your new rulers. Defiance of this rule will result in a swift mace to the back of the head. Rule #4 -- None shall speak, address, or even so much as breathe in the presence of an Overlord or a Disciple unless so commanded. Defiance of this rule will result in a swift mace to the back of the head. Rule #5 -- On the rare privilege that your worthless carcass is commanded to speak, you WILL address your superiors in this matter "Thank you for allowing me to speak oh magnificent one, he who has killed a thousand by sun-up and will have killed a thousand more before breakfast, he who has spilled enough blood to fill an ocean, he whose loins have fathered a million children, he who I thank for the very privilege of drawing my next breath, he who has command over my every movement, I, your worthless, pathetic excuse for a living thing, thank you for the opportunity to speak." Having said this, the person commanded to speak will shut up and your majestic superiors will then tell you what you were going to say. Defiance of this rule will result in a swift mace to the back of the head. Rule #7 -- No sorry excuse for a waste of living tissue will so much as look, touch, kick, spit or fart in the direction of my ex-wife. Defiance of this rule will result in...a reward of 1000 gold coins. Gods she's annoying!!!!! And the final and most important rule, Rule #8 -- All bunny rabbits are to be banned from the land immediately. They will be hunted until every last one has been wiped from the face of this puny planet. All will take part in this noble effort. Why must this be undertaken? Have you seen their demonic noses? Their beady little eyes? Their monstrous long ears? They are to be feared above all creatures, yeah, the rumors of even Overlords fearing these ghastly, horrifying beasts is rumored to be true. Again, all people of the land will take part in the obliteration of the bunny rabbits!!! Defiance of this rule will result in a...yep, you guessed it!...a swift mace to the back of the head. Wait, did I just hear something? Did some one utter the name of that worthless prattle Kjarran? WHO SAID THAT? WHO THE FUDGE SAID THAT? WHO'S THE SLIMEY LITTLE TWINKLE TOES COMMUNIST KJARRAN SUCKER WHO JUST SIGNED HIS OWN DEATH WARRANT?!??!? NOBODY, HUH? THE FAIRY FRIGGIN GOD-MOTHER SAID IT!! OUT-FUDGING-STANDING!!! I WILL WHIP YOU ALL TILL ALL YOU FRIGGIN DIE!!! I WILL WHIP TILL YOUR BUTTCHEEKS ARE SUCKING BUTTERMILK!!! WAS IT YOU, Noachian, YOU SCROUNGE LITTLE Servant of the long- dead-and-not-of-much-use-when-he-was-alive Kjarran? I'LL BET IT WAS YOU!! YOU LOOK LIKE A FRIGGIN WORM!!!! -- Odin You may all now go back to your meaningless, pathetic, worthless, unimaginative, repulsive, demeaning, pointless, of no value, insignificant, useless, rubbish, empty, hollow, meaningless lives. Thank you and have a rotten evening! -- Odin I suppose it's rather out of place to welcome you back after all that.... *grin* -- Ed. 15 January 2005 BR 4 is upon us! First turn is due on 1/29/05. Many thanks to RSI for helping supply a great prize for the winner and those who meet the 90% endurance criteria. Winning prize: 6 months free play, a +1 bonus potion, a limited damage potion, a favorites knowledge potion, a minor stat-switch prize, and renaming a Dark Arena creature. Endurance prizes: a +1 bonus potion to all teams that fight 90% of the possible fights during the contest. For details, visit Talcama's newletter or http://www.geocities.com/assurnasir/br4 To join, simply bring a team to DM 18, announce your entry in the personals, and follow the very simple rule of not avoiding! 31 January 2005 My fellow duelists I come before you bearing a sad and unfortunate message. Several months ago our group, the Vendetta Cartel, had lost contact with one of our friends. Since he was in contact or correspondence on an almost daily basis there was concern amongst us. With some research two of our members discovered why contact was lost with him. On November 10, 2004, Richard Hammes was taken from us in a senseless act of violence during a robbery attempt at a friend's store where he sometimes worked. He was watching the store so his friend could go home to tend to his son who had taken ill. You may have known Rich as Abarsis, The Slaughter Priest ; richh10 on the RT; or gameogre on the Duel2 messageboard. You may not have known that he spent 13 years serving the United States in the Navy. Rich dearly loved this game and all it encompassed. He may not have been the best or most experienced manager but he loved to interact with others and was quick to offer advice whenever anyone asked for help. He was always kind and gracious and tried to strengthen our game, often by helping new players feel welcome or give them a chance to compete. With his prolific posting I know that I am simply speaking the obvious about what he did for our game. Many, like me, were drawn to him, perhaps for his kind nature or his sense of humor, and it appears he lived his life as he played this game. Always willing to help or do right by others. I realize that he had many friends outside the VC so I will include the link to the news story in case any of his other friends would like to know more of what happened. We're all dealt a hand in life but it's not the strength of the hand you're dealt but rather how you play it that really matters. Rich played his hand to the very best of his human ability and for this I admire him greatly. I know we all choose to like or dislike managers but I believe deep down we are all good and decent, in this game, and will drop party (alliance) lines and will show the proper respect. http://www.signonsandiego.com/uniontrib/20041112/news_7m12clerk.html Rich was taken from us all to soon and with so much left to offer the community around him. He spoke of a desire to run a contest on the Duel2 site which I hope to uphold in his name. Some of the people I have spoken with think it would be a nice gesture to do one final good act in Rich's name, though it could never match what he would've done within his community, for his community of San Diego. I hope that with this contest we might raise a little money to donate to an appropriate charity within San Diego in his name. In conclusion I send a message to Rich: "Rich, though I'm sure you gathered this I never really told you how much I admired you and what a friend I considered you. I thank you for being my voice of reason and always reminding me of why we both loved this game so much! You have taught me one final valuable lesson in learning more of you. There are things far more valuable in life than material possessions such as character and kindness. That nothing going on in your life means that you cannot find a way to be kind and giving to others. We always spoke of meeting someday and until we finally do know that you will live on in with me and the rest of your brothers and sisters in the Cartel: Master Darque, Kat, Bum, Sensei Jan, Maximillian, Hammer, Fizban, Firehawk, Phat Phat. You increased all of our enjoyment of this game, you were a true ambassador of Duelmasters, and the game will not be quite the same without you. A farewell battle cry from the ZalCon: 'Confusion to our enemies'. May your soul rest in peace, my friend." Should anyone wish to correspond about Rich feel free to contact myself, or anyone else within the Vendetta Cartel. Street Legal Jeff Bura The Death Squad(63) in Tobir or triumph1971@hotmail.com 31 January 2005 Be it known throughout Alastari that Hammer is no longer a member of the Vendetta Cartel alliance. A difference of opinion with another highly respected member of the VC due to my recent vocal actions in DM 47 can only be resolved by my resignation from the VC as of January 29, 2005. I leave of my own accord, in good standing with all members and with no hard feelings towards anyone in the Vendetta Cartel. There was a time when I felt that my membership in the VC made the alliance stronger. I know that my resignation today makes the Vendetta Cartel a stronger alliance with my absence. -- Hammer 1 February 2005 St. Valentine's Massacre update My apologies, the Kill Contest starting on turn 476 in Jhans will run for 10 (ten) turns ending on turn number 486. Azrael 5 February 2005 On behalf of the ILLUMINATI Confederation of Alliances (The kLk, CHAOS, Inc. and The Company of Brothers) I would like to express our sympathies concerning the tragic loss of Rich Hammes to both the DM community and to the real life world. Surely our loss has been Heaven's gain. -- Talon Darkhart, deeply sorrowful kLk God of War, Illuminati Alliance, Puppetmaster LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS VALTRON was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight. LEE VIATHON was barely slain by SHEWISH GIANT in a exciting 1 minute Dark Arena duel. JERRY ATTRICKS viciously subdued DEO VOLENTE in a 1 minute gory Challenge match. ADARA AL ZAHRA lost to SIT in a 1 minute master's Title brawl. DYER, RHEA was overpowered by DING HAO in a 1 minute one-sided fight. BHAGWANDASS devastated WHITE WOLF in a 1 minute uneven brawl. TRAVEL HOLIDAY was assassinated by VED BUENS ENDE in a 1 minute one-sided struggle. (PLAIN WRAPPER) was devastated by AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 1 minute one-sided competition. SFORNO OBADJA was handily defeated by ELLE in a 1 minute uneven melee. SPORTS III was vanquished by SANDY BEECH in a 1 minute one-sided duel. B lost to LIZA LOTT in a 1 minute novice's duel. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |LUNGING ATTACK 5 BASHING ATTACK 8 - 1 - 1 89 | |SLASHING ATTACK 4 TOTAL PARRY 12 - 6 - 0 67 | |AIMED BLOW 3 AIMED BLOW 9 - 7 - 1 56 | |STRIKING ATTACK 3 LUNGING ATTACK 20 - 19 - 0 51 | |PARRY-STRIKE 1 WALL OF STEEL 1 - 1 - 0 50 | |BASHING ATTACK 1 STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 4 - 0 43 | |TOTAL PARRY 1 SLASHING ATTACK 12 - 16 - 4 43 | |WALL OF STEEL 1 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 2 - 0 0 | |PARRY-LUNGE 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 - 0 0 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 0 - 0 0 | Turn 503 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: SLASHING ATTACK 3 - 1 AIMED BLOW 1 - 2 5 LUNGING ATTACK LUNGING ATTACK 3 - 2 STRIKING ATTACK 1 - 2 3 AIMED BLOW PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 0 1 SLASHING ATTACK PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 1 1 STRIKING ATTACK PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 1 TOTAL PARRY BASHING ATTACK 0 - 1 TOTAL PARRY 0 - 1 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 1 TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME SLASHING ATTACK SIT 4228 14 11 2 96 VALHALLA (344) STRIKING ATTACK DING HAO 4750 9 3 2 91 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) TOTAL PARRY ADARA AL ZAHRA 3989 22 13 0 87 JAGUAR WARRIORS (296) LUNGING ATTACK DYER, RHEA 4181 7 3 0 69 BAD YEARBOOK NAMES (364) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is WHITE WOLF 3878. The most popular warrior this turn was SIT 4228. The ten other most popular fighters were BHAGWANDASS 4595, ELLE 4003, SANDY BEECH 4811, LEE VIATHON 4810, JERRY ATTRICKS 4797, DING HAO 4750, VED BUENS ENDE 4749, LIZA LOTT 4813, DYER, RHEA 4181, and B 4182. The least popular fighter this week was SPORTS III 4812. The other ten least popular fighters were SFORNO OBADJA 4662, (PLAIN WRAPPER) 4004, TRAVEL HOLIDAY 3992, WHITE WOLF 3878, ADARA AL ZAHRA 3989, DEO VOLENTE 4751, VALTRON 4648, B 4182, DYER, RHEA 4181, and LIZA LOTT 4813. Name-Change-O-Rama The winter tourney brought a lot of people to the Isle who didn't appear there normally. This included Commission employees. Half a dozen arenamasters regarded each other warily in the mirror behind the bar at the Pig in a Haystack. The Pig was obscure and mediocre, drawing few gladiators, which is what they had all been looking for. They saw gladiators every day. Most arenamaster were convinced that this was some kind of punishment. You could always pick out the arenamasters in a crowd. There were superficial differences: One of these had clearly Adantri features, one wore an eye-patch, two were female. But there were, in significant ways, alike. The same size, the same hair-trigger alertness, the same deadliness. The one-eyed man broke the ice, raising his beer mug in salute. "I'm Zrof One- Eye from Zukal. Sugar of Arvat--" One of the women bowed slightly. "I know Sugar. The rest of you...?" The Adantri matched his salute. "Dernal of Dayla Kiv." "Daiyla Kiv? Ah...." "No, without the 'I' in it. These damned bureaucrats can't spell, and they thought adding an unnecessary vowel was exotic." Disgust dripped from his voice. "Tell me about it!" another man growled in agreement. "Khagal of Niatoli, and what they do to the spelling of THAT simple word--!" "I thought Daiyla, I mean Dayla Kiv had a different name right now," Arenamistress Sugar said. "The arena, at least, because of a contest?" "Chavez Ravine." Dernal's tone was the one that substituted in polite company for spitting on the floor. Zrof blinked, taken aback by the bitterness. He wouldn't have minded a contest in Zukal, and damn what they called the place. "It's only temporary, though." "Temporary, shmiperary," another man muttered. He seemed well into his drinking, although, like all arenamasters, he carried his liquor well. "They do it all the time in Aradi. No reshpect. Go around changing thish, changing that. I wish I could change shome thingsh." He signalled the bartender for a refill. The second woman put her hand over his mug. "You've had enough, Harkon. Try the coffee, instead." "You should be mad, too, Ripplesh," Harkon said. "They're going to do shtuff like that in Jahnsh, aren't they?" Ripples Dorrigan shrugged. All the men paused, some with glasses half raised, to watch. "It's the way things are," she said. "Not much we can do about it." "You know," Khagal of Niatoli said, "maybe we could make a few changes. Fix the spelling of Arena 33, for one, change a few standby titles--" "The Commission hates changes." Dernal of Dayla Kiv topped up his glass and drained it gloomily. "Yes, but if we disguise it," Sugar of Arvat said, excited, "make it... maybe a general Name-Change-O-Rama! Then we could slip OUR changes through and no one would notice or mind." *-------*-------*-------*-------*-------*-------* By popular demand, we are holding a Name-Change-o-Rama during the month of March. If you wish to change the name of your warriors or teams, please contact RSI Customer Service. The charge for a name change is $1, unless you're in DOOMCorps, in which case you take your chances. (Just kidding, guys! *snicker*)