DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER Date : 11/22/2006 Duedate: 12/05/2006 SUNSET ARENA DM-21 TURN-548 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS SWIMMING SPORTS (497) (21-5693) [12-6-0,110] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader SWIMMING POSITION IS EMPTY SPORTS (497) (21-5693) [12-6-0,110] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite MUSHIKU BO SHERWOOD KANO CLAN (106) LITERATE LOONS (538) (21-5713) [14-18-0,70] (21-6208) [10-14-0,44] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM NOMADIC TRIBE (160) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. NOMADIC TRIBE (160) 64 2. PHILTHBALLS (554) 51 SPORTS (497) 3. LAKOTA (362) 24 Unchartered Team 4. FORCED VENGEANCE (542) 23 5. FEEBLE LEGION (547) 23 IN MY ROOM (545) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1/ 1 SPORTS (497) 25 14 0 64.1 1/ 1 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) 11 2 0 2/ 3 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) 47 29 0 61.8 2/ 8 LAKOTA (362) 8 1 0 3/ 2 METAL MARVELS (548) 46 29 1 61.3 3/11*PHILTHBALLS (554) 7 8 1 4- 4 AGE OF EMPIRE (376) 83 62 8 57.2 4/10 METAL MARVELS (548) 6 4 0 5/ 0*IN MY ROOM (545) 4 3 1 57.1 5/ 7 GRIM FANDANGO (454) 6 7 0 6/ 5 LAKOTA (362) 245 185 12 57.0 6/ 5 DOC LEGRAND'S AVIAN (57) 6 9 0 7- 6 D.R.I. (536) 69 53 6 56.6 7- 6 EQUITES VIRTUS (535) 5 3 1 8/ 7 GRIM FANDANGO (454) 340 290 8 54.0 8/ 3 LITERATE LOONS (538) 5 10 0 9/ 8*FEEBLE LEGION (547) 15 15 2 50.0 9- 2 D.R.I. (536) 4 5 0 10-11 SONS OF SATAN (20) 344 347 40 49.8 10/14 SPORTS (497) 3 1 0 11/10 DOC LEGRAND'S AVIAN (57) 438 442 38 49.8 11/16 KANO CLAN (106) 3 4 0 12-12 EQUITES VIRTUS (535) 42 43 7 49.4 12/ 4*WARMASTERS (551) 3 8 0 13-13 NASTY MOB (456) 114 129 9 46.9 13- 9 NASTY MOB (456) 2 2 0 14/17*PHILTHBALLS (554) 7 8 1 46.7 14/18*FORCED VENGEANCE (542) 2 4 0 15/14 LITERATE LOONS (538) 55 65 5 45.8 15/15*FEEBLE LEGION (547) 2 4 0 16/ 9*WARMASTERS (551) 13 17 2 43.3 16/12*RAGING LORDS (552) 2 10 0 17-15 K.G.B. (51) 76 100 6 43.2 17-13 AGE OF EMPIRE (376) 1 0 0 18/16 KANO CLAN (106) 177 251 10 41.4 18/ 0*IN MY ROOM (545) 1 0 0 Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 19/19*FORCED VENGEANCE (542) 4 10 0 28.6 19-17 SONS OF SATAN (20) 1 4 0 20/18*RAGING LORDS (552) 6 19 0 24.0 20-19 K.G.B. (51) 0 1 0 '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank DUELMASTER'S COLUMN Notes from the arena champ. Opportunities come and go. Such is the story of how I came to be on the throne of Sunset. After my unlikely Adepts TV this summer, Assur had all but closed the Sports stable. Sure, we were still required to do some training, but the funds to run a full blown outfit had been shifted to Assur's other interests in Talcama. But his eyes had not completely left the arena. Doc Legrand's slasher was on top, and Assur has always liked the Basher-Slasher matchup. Thinking maybe he could take the throne on a random matchup, we were given the opportunity to fight again. And let me tell you, sitting on the throne is a whole lot better than waiting tables. I may be waiting tables again soon, but for now, I will enjoy this opportunity to once again prove myself against you all. The future? I believe I safely can say that I will be fighting three turns here. If I can win out, Assur's decision is made for him. If I should lose one or more of those fights, Assur will decide whether to give me a shot in the Champs tourney. He says I stand no chance, but he said that when he entered me into the Adepts tourney, too. And he wants a Champs TV badly. I suspect if I'm not in ADM, I will fight as a champion. It is Assur's pattern. He agrees with the sport's hero, Wayne Gretzky: "You'll always miss 100% of the shots you don't take." Swimming SPY REPORT Welcome SUNSET. I, Olaf Modeen remember this place well. Many the fights have I fought here. The celebrations, the disappointments... Phhbltt! Too much drinking and too little dodging gave WARMASTERS a 0-5-0! I got a good laugh out of it! Up 'n down. Up 'n down. Rankings always change. Up 'n down. I think I'm gonna be... Well, PHILTHBALLS' 3rd moved them up to 4-1-1 place. LAKOTA showed SUNSET what they were made of as they fought with a vengeance to walk off with 4-1-0. What's with BLACK TIGER? He actually beat DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS' FLAMING FLAMINGO, and walked away with 19 more points from the fight. Try as he might, BONEDUST wasn't good enough at persuading SWIMMING to step down from the Duelmaster's throne... I suppose you want to hear some rumors and dirty gossip about your fellow fighters? Tough! Speaking of cowardly avoiders and unfair challenges... How well I know the feeling of being in the most avoided team! Don't fall out of practive, EQUITES VIRTUS! The bums at WARMASTERS couldn't face the challenges from EQUITES VIRTUS! No excuse for that! How well I know the feeling of being the most challenged warrior, MUSHIKU BO! Don't make idle boasts, they may come back to haunt you. Taunt your opponent HART CRANE! That was my lucky charm when I was unfairly challenged. (and by 32 points!) VOLLEYBALL should have an easy win. VOLLEYBALL's gonna be practicin' hard this week, after HART CRANE, lower ranked by far, mashed it! HAMSUN didn't quite know what to make of a challenge he received from BLESSED BLUEJAY of DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS, who is 20 points below him. BLESSED BLUEJAY perhaps got hers just desserts, seeing as she beat HAMSUN and ended up with 51 recognition points. I hate going to the effort of writing about the kind of fights that CHASSIS gets in. He fights people like RED ROBIN, 8 points below. I thought CHASSIS showed great skill and promise when he lost to RED ROBIN. All right, so I slept through it! Big deal! There have been some calls to lengthen the time limit. Do you want the fighters to walk away, or not? Who will dare fight IDONTWANNALIVE, after he returned from the Dark Arena? (For the record 1-0-1 is 33, and has he points) Is it my imagination, or are fighters getting younger every day? To die so young, so gloriously! Well, I'm pretty much through. You guys need to get back practicing. Are you as tired of reading this as I am of writing it? Actually, I guess I'm writing it before you read it. Oh, well. I don't want to overstay my welcome...-- Olaf Modeen DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME SWIMMING 5693 12 6 0 110 SPORTS (497) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -CALPURNIA 6173 10 7 1 95 EQUITES VIRTUS (535) HART CRANE 6207 11 13 2 92 LITERATE LOONS (538) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -KHORAG 6011 11 5 3 87 AGE OF EMPIRE (376) -JASON 558 9 5 1 86 K.G.B. (51) BONEDUST 6098 19 18 0 85 GRIM FANDANGO (454) SHAMAN 1706 13 2 0 85 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) BLACK TIGER 1705 9 7 0 83 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) VOLLEYBALL 5691 12 6 0 78 SPORTS (497) BULGAKOV 6244 13 6 1 76 LITERATE LOONS (538) -AZRAEL 6076 11 15 0 73 SONS OF SATAN (20) -MATSUDA KAO 5712 15 7 0 72 KANO CLAN (106) -MOMORO WA 5514 20 10 0 70 KANO CLAN (106) MUSHIKU BO 5713 14 18 0 70 KANO CLAN (106) CROW BAR 6332 9 3 0 70 METAL MARVELS (548) WEST WIND 5125 12 6 1 68 LAKOTA (362) FLAMING FLAMINGO 3570 14 11 0 67 DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS (57) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -VIOLENT PACIFICATION 6180 16 8 0 66 D.R.I. (536) -CROUCHING HAMSTER 6184 13 12 1 64 D.R.I. (536) -JACKAL 6193 5 4 1 64 NASTY MOB (456) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME BLESSED BLUEJAY 3633 8 8 0 51 DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS (57) GRAVEYARD TAN 6278 10 4 0 48 GRIM FANDANGO (454) -VERGIL 6169 10 8 0 48 EQUITES VIRTUS (535) -XAPHAN 6126 8 12 1 47 SONS OF SATAN (20) BAD HANDWRITING 6276 5 1 0 46 LAKOTA (362) NERVE RAKER 1874 9 8 0 45 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) SHERWOOD 6208 10 14 0 44 LITERATE LOONS (538) BRAVOS 6368 4 2 0 44 GRIM FANDANGO (454) VINCENT 6324 7 2 0 43 METAL MARVELS (548) VULGE 6260 8 8 0 42 GRIM FANDANGO (454) -BUBBA 626 4 1 0 42 K.G.B. (51) DR. DREAM 1709 8 4 0 41 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) LEAD 6316 7 5 0 40 METAL MARVELS (548) HAMSUN 6289 6 8 0 40 LITERATE LOONS (538) GLASS CEILING 6299 5 3 1 38 FEEBLE LEGION (547) HADRIAN 6361 4 2 0 38 WARMASTERS (551) MOLTEN METAL 6333 6 11 0 37 METAL MARVELS (548) VENGEFUL VULTURE 4604 5 7 0 35 DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS (57) DOILY 6298 5 2 0 34 FEEBLE LEGION (547) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME HOOLIGAN 6374 3 2 0 33 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) IDONTWANNALIVE 6417 1 0 1 33 PHILTHBALLS (554) -BUBONIC BEN 6252 6 3 0 31 NASTY MOB (456) -QUINTUS REX 6243 4 2 2 31 EQUITES VIRTUS (535) CONRAD 6308 4 8 1 31 LITERATE LOONS (538) -JAYNA 6305 4 2 0 30 SONS OF SATAN (20) ROAD RUNNER 6237 5 1 0 28 LAKOTA (362) MEGA ROKU 6091 4 2 2 28 KANO CLAN (106) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -WILLIN POINER 571 5 7 1 27 K.G.B. (51) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -GENGHIS TRON 6311 5 3 1 23 D.R.I. (536) -DIMITRI 613 3 5 1 23 K.G.B. (51) FLOOR 6287 2 0 0 22 IN MY ROOM (545) BRUTUS 6360 5 2 0 21 WARMASTERS (551) LURKER 6264 3 0 0 21 FORCED VENGEANCE (542) THE LEPER 6400 3 0 0 20 PHILTHBALLS (554) TIBERIUS 6357 2 3 1 20 WARMASTERS (551) -KARNAX 6174 1 1 0 20 AGE OF EMPIRE (376) LITTLE FLOWER 6367 2 0 0 18 LAKOTA (362) BLEDD 6351 3 6 0 15 GRIM FANDANGO (454) -BONEFACE 6372 1 4 0 15 RAGING LORDS (552) MISASHI SAN 6084 4 2 0 14 KANO CLAN (106) -VELARIA 6256 3 3 2 14 EQUITES VIRTUS (535) -LIGHT FIXTURE 6286 1 0 1 14 IN MY ROOM (545) VICTOR 6358 2 4 1 13 WARMASTERS (551) GREY GROUSE 4689 2 5 0 13 DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS (57) -ATTILA 6376 2 0 0 13 NASTY MOB (456) -VASE 6362 2 2 0 12 FEEBLE LEGION (547) SEVERO 6359 0 6 0 12 WARMASTERS (551) -SHAKA CONNIE 6381 2 2 0 10 D.R.I. (536) RED ROBIN 6413 1 1 0 10 DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS (57) -DRIVE BY SAMURI 6390 1 0 0 10 D.R.I. (536) NETHERBORN 6407 1 0 0 10 FORCED VENGEANCE (542) SUNSHINE 6414 1 0 0 10 LAKOTA (362) BLOODLUST 6402 2 1 0 9 PHILTHBALLS (554) -FRED 627 1 4 0 7 K.G.B. (51) -ZAN 6304 1 4 0 7 SONS OF SATAN (20) SILVERBLEED 6379 0 1 0 7 FORCED VENGEANCE (542) -CICERO 6262 1 3 0 6 EQUITES VIRTUS (535) CHASSIS 6375 1 3 0 6 METAL MARVELS (548) DARLA 6416 1 0 0 6 PHILTHBALLS (554) -GLEEK 6314 0 4 0 5 SONS OF SATAN (20) -WINDOW 6288 1 1 0 4 IN MY ROOM (545) LACE 6404 0 1 0 3 FEEBLE LEGION (547) -RAGING BULL 6386 0 2 0 2 RAGING LORDS (552) SYENDRAD 6406 0 1 0 1 FORCED VENGEANCE (542) -GRIMLORD 6412 0 1 0 1 RAGING LORDS (552) WICCAN 6415 0 1 0 1 PHILTHBALLS (554) -MOLECULES 6285 0 1 0 1 IN MY ROOM (545) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? SHEWISH GIANT 408 0 1 0 DARK ARENA 0 IDONTWANNALIVE 6417 548 NONE FORGET IT 6405 0 1 0 FEEBLE LEGION 547 ARENAMASTER HARTH 410 548 NONE GANG BANGER 6364 1 2 0 NASTY MOB 456 VICTOR 6358 544 NOT REVE CRAZYSKULL 6369 3 3 0 RAGING LORDS 552 QUICKSILVER 406 548 NONE THE OLD COBBLER 6385 0 3 0 RAGING LORDS 552 SHEWISH GIANT 408 548 NONE SNAKELIP 6370 0 3 0 RAGING LORDS 552 GENGHIS TRON 6311 545 REVENGED HATCHETFACE 6398 0 1 0 RAGING LORDS 552 VELARIA 6256 546 PERSONAL ADS But I like my cage! -- Grey Grouse Bad news dude, Doc LeGrand likes to use the clone tank in sessions, with the Cardinal down, I bet you are next. -- Blessed Bluejay How can a chartered team lead Sunset with no kills?! The tiddly-winks Sports Team at 24-13-0-.649?! Is this the allegedly deadly Delarquan Sunset or a closet namby-pamby Andorian happy hole? -- Sir Steel Matsudo Kao -- You lucky, lazy tortoise shell! Next time you will become my turtle soup for lunch. -- Crow Bar Mr. Stik -- Sunset has a high kill ratio? Oh? Then where are all the deaths? Can an Andorian Sports team run Sunset? Deaths? Check out Ardivent, The Arena Of The Red Sands, (yes, it is in namby-pamby Andoria) where more blood is spilt that in this sunny PG-rated Sunset. Bah, Humbug! -- Sir Steel Mr. Doc LeGrand and Cunning Prince -- It is true that I had 10 arena fights and 39 Tournament fights pre Mailer. It is also true that one of my very favorite moments was showing your prince that he was a worthless old-timer. I am only sorry that I missed the kill. -- Juniper, proud and talented sandbagger extraordinaire What?! Guardian is trying to shut down this and other arenas? What a bum! Come on out and fight, Bully Boy. -- Sir Steel An offering of Mailer luck from all the Con Knights -- "May all your warriors sent have been killed". -- Sir Steel Stik -- Rumor has it that some of the ladies in Chimlevtal thought you looked quite formidable with your panties in a bunch. Were you exhibiting that golden longsword again? -- Sir Steel Bravos and Stik -- Not only did I know it was coming, but I fully and completely deserved it. You Cads! -- Lead (feeling very malleable) Grey Grouse -- It is always a pleasure to take one of Doc's down to size. -- Sir Steel (for Chassis) Mushiku Bo -- Nasty, nasty challenging me like that. But, thanks for the win, Mumble Jumble. -- Crow Bar Doc -- Thank you for the advertisement in the form of a DM Column. (yawn) -- Sir Steel Flamingo -- (A turn late, but...) The oldest Duelmaster ever? In Sunset maybe, but probably not anywhere. Another of Nomad's warriors, Marshal from Bonsur, just graduated to AD after having held the throne for a couple of turns. He fought his first fight in June of '90. Red Lance, another Sentinel from Bonsur, hopes to claim the throne there soon and his first fight was on turn 78 of that fair city--March of '88. 14 years away from the game can have some interesting consequences. -- Shaman, acting historian for Nomad Vincent -- Interesting weapon choice. Not very effective, but interesting. -- Raker Jackal -- After all the effort I went through to challenge, defeat and teach you, and yet you teach me nothing? It almost seems as if you were ungrateful! I'm very disappointed. -- Shaman Hooligan! Hooligan! Now where did that troublemaker go? AWOL. He was supposed to fight. I've never had a warrior oversleep his fight before. Unbelievable! -- Nomad Vergil -- Now that was fun! Tiring, but fun. -- Black Tiger Zan -- I think you are supposed to actually hit someone with that thing your holding. You know, like what I did to you. That was fun. -- Dream Wow. Cordial Cardinal, Zero and Dark Sky all die in one tournament. A harsh day for Sunset. Congrats to Bad Handwriting for upholding some of the cities honor. -- Nomad Assur and Sports -- Welcome back, congrats on the throne! Stay a while, the place grows on you. -- Stik Damion -- Same to you! Care to take up my "Race to 400" challenge yet? I'm almost caught up to you... -- Stik K.G.B. -- Welcome back to you too, Comrade!! Nice to see another double digit team number showing up in town! I used to run the Cripplers here back in the early years, Grim Fandango now. Stop by the Broken Bone, it's still open, drinks on us tonight post-fights! -- Stik and G.F. Doc L. -- Thanks for the informative column. Keep your chin up, tourney wise, it will improve as you shake the rust off! -- Stik Violent P. -- Yep, still my weeyatch. I needed that to get back into the C.C.'s, thanks! -- Bonedust Hamsun -- Damnit, you keep coming out faster than we think. Appreciate the skills, anyhow. -- Bravos The Leper -- (disgustedly) Well, scratch that weapon off the faves list, unfortunately. Beginner's luck! -- Bledd All -- Well, not much of a tourney for us, looks like. Congrats to our one TV, Shaman's Bad Handwriting, well fought! -- Stik and G.F. Doc Legrand -- I feel for you, my friend. Tournaments are pretty much for the elite of the elite. The game was not originally designed for ADM and 20 years of development on a single warrior. Not surprisingly, the game is not balanced. Add in tourney prizes and freaks, and Primus is a joke. However, the game is still fun and even though warrior generation and strategy have become a science to some, that little thing called luck makes the game fun for me. And not everyone who runs warriors has the standards of The Muffin Man. I hope you don't grow so discouraged in your return that you leave us again! You bring a lot to this game. See you on the sands. -- Assur P.S. I trust you to realize that my taking the throne was more about style matchup (and yes, I intentionally returned with your slasher on the throne, hoping for the mismatch) than my warriors being uber godling Tourney warriors. Both my bashers here are good, but they would never have seen the light of day under a tourney manager's ownership. Stik -- Nice name, feeble one. My counterpart and I have come to conquer this repulsive arena and it appears you are at the top of our scroll. I will not say who he is, but he is raging to kill your whole outfit. I didn't ask for a welcome, especially from someone as unknown as you, ye of little intelligence. Go find another arena to play with your tenure here is through, pus brain. -- Philthy Phil, mgr. Philthballs and ninth in command of the Allied Axis Phil -- You do realize that you're trying to have it both ways, don't you? -- NAIEI General Ikillu -- I do not believe my sack of oranges can fight back the scurvy in this sorry city. -- Philthy Doc Le Moron -- You're at the top of my long list, freak boy. -- Philthy Phil, filthiest man...need I stik more. P.S. That's sense of smell uneducated one. Phil -- A nice hot bath, with plenty of soap, will take care of the smell for you. -- NAIEI, the ever helpful Ed. -- could we get a team/manager list printed, please? Thanks. -- Stik Here's what I have. These are teams listed in last turn's newsletter. I'm still recovering from the chaos in my lists, so any corrections are welcome! -- The Saint, keeper of lists AGE OF EMPIRE Doc Steele LITERATE LOONS Sherman D.R.I. Var METAL MARVELS Sir Steel DOC LEGRAND'S AVIANS Doc LeGrand NASTY MOB Papa Bear EQUITES VIRTUS Dark Knight Toker NOMADIC TRIBE Nomad FEEBLE LEGION Seraphim PHILTHBALLS Philthy Phil FORCED VENGEANCE Rosebud RAGING LORDS ? GRIM FANDANGO Stik SONS OF SATAN Damion K.G.B. ? SPORTS Assurnasirbanipal KANO CLAN Doc Miracle WARMASTERS Vanek LAKOTA Shaman 2 November 2006 I received a Gift Certificate from someone. I'm assuming it's for entry into the Turf War 5. Whoever sent this to me...please email me at email@example.com. Thanks. 10 November 2006 The Quest of the Best has come to an end. Dark Knight Toker, host of the Quest, wants to proclaim the Ultimate Victor and give a listing of prize winners. Lady Fern and her Flower Girls of the Consortium are the Ultimate Victors of the Quest. Well fought and there's nothing like coming from behind to leave us all in the dust. Can't wait to see you defend your title! (wink) Here is a complete list of managers who placed in prize positions: 1) Lady Fern, mgr. Flower Girls 2) Le Pentarque, mgr. Blood & Guts! 3) Crip, mgr. Otto's Parts 4) D.K. Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Odin's Chosen 5) Ghab, mgr. Assassin Nation 6) Fanthayne, mgr. Dark Raiders 7) D.K. Toker, mgr. Silver Knights 8) D.K. Wasby, mgr. Bronze Knights 9) The Expatriate, mgr. Bleak Legion 10) Still the Distilled, mgr. Springborne Fair Thanks to all that had the gall to show up, but I really want to thank the managers that had the mettle to survive and not run when they started getting their butt handed to them. Respect to All. Quest #1 host, Dark Knight Toker 14 November 2006 A Tale of Fusion Confusion Delusion Revolution as told by Hammer the WordSmith SomeWhere Beyond ElseWhere and ElseWhen a hooded figure brooded upon the lingering wisps of memory from days gone by. From the howling sands to the sanding howls the streams of thought bubbled and flowed, winding endlessly entwined within the darkest recesses and lightest resources of the learned and unlearned disciplines of managerial mayhem and manipulation. Nameless faces and faceless names floated in the swirling mists of madness embalmed within the memories of one who knew he did not know how far reaching the influences [both positive and negative] had rooted and flowered in the march of time and energy expended in the historical markings of gladiatorial essence and excellence experience. The tamed and the untamed coupled with the named and the unnamed resources that spilt their sweat and blood on the sands of arenas both known and unknown had metamorphosed into the dreamings and the schemings of the fadings of jadings and paradings [in both public and private] amongst the elite and the indiscreet posturings and babblings of managers becoming legends in their own minds and times. Hammer pondered upon beginnings and the seemingly endless myriad of endings possibly possible among the interspersed and intertwined impossible possibilities presently past and future. Echoing and reechoing in the vast depths and countless compartments along the corridors of his mind, Hammer played and replayed the glories shared and dared in the sixty-plus stabled arena on fabled Noblish Island DM 93. The training had been all too brief, but the competition generated by the multi faceted personages inhabiting DM 93 and the sheer multitude of numbers had forever instilled themselves in the heart and soul of the veteran manager [Hammer]; insomuch that the migration to Niatoli Island DM 33 triggered the desire to emulate the glory and the grandeur of the spectacle of stables vying for recognition from among the virtually numberless no-name newbies making names for themselves as they numbered their stables and accomplishments for all to see and behold, to the song and the sound of the sight of clashing cold cruel steel simmering the flesh of gallant gladiators consumed by the gory and the glory of crossing blades with the superior and the inferior within the interior of Greywand's Global Gladiatorial Galaxy. Far far ago and long long away had many abandoned hope for a return to the reminiscences revered by so many managers; predating even the generations of gladiators graduating from Noblish Island and the years of yore and gore and gallantry before. Rumblings and mumblings of a renovation rejuvenating the reflexes of managers numbed by the numberless trysts of tourney tarnished stables began revolutionizing the very fabric of time and space and time-honored tradition throughout the ranks of visionary newbies and volatile veterans alike and dislike. History was being shaken to the core of the gore as glory and grandeur responded to the revelry reverie revelations and reveille revolutionizing the creation of a new arena in the making; populated by No-Tourney Warriors and Full Stable Participants pledging to forge a new vision version of "The Fiercest and Best" for crossing blades and crosser banter in the personal ads and team spotlight tomes. Now was the time for Hammer to emerge and once again merge his talent among the gifted and grifted; answering the call to assemble the drifted [and to directly divulge and converge with the dozens] for the destiny of destructive denizens determined to build a new legacy upon the all-but-forgotten ashes of the old and olden legends of times lost. [TIME JUMP] Hammer sifted the sands in the dead of night in the desert reaches [located SomeWhere BeYond ElseWhere and ElseWhen] to discover 5 gladiators not tourney worthy, yet interesting enough to begin their careers in a No-Tourney Arena! "They need not be dispatched to the Dark Arena," the veteran manager mused as he sorted through paperwork long discarded and vaguely forgotten, "because there is nothing like a good Blood Feud to provide inspiration for writing personal ads in the arena newsletter! Besides, there are times when the replacement for a warrior wounded mortally on the arena sands fares much better than the one exchanged from Torch Light!" Fights by Torch Light were certainly deemed unnecessary as Hammer had already deduced that a number of determined stables would undoubtedly congregate with High Octane Warriors under the guidance of Higher Octane Managers to populate and depopulate the new No-Tourney Arena currently under construction in DM 81. Fortunately his feeble foray into the desert would yield somewhat suitable candidates for the newfound purposes Hammer had in mind. From among the candidates to be found Hammer would be rewarded in time by BLOODFEUDS and REPLACEMENT WARRIORS aplenty! Deep into the night Hammer searched and searched until five not-so-promising stables were uncovered in the waning hours before dawn. Ripper discards were scattered far and wide, but this was not the time or the hour to let sentimental views cloud the issue at hand. Future events would lend themselves to a suitable Ripper replacement, especially with the prospects Hammer was now sorting for his selection decision to dispatch to the Gladiatorial Commission for processing. Most managers have the luxury of selecting the best group [or discarding the worst group!] Hammer had the novelty of rounding up the castaways from the New Stables paperwork accumulated long ago from Maximillian's Morya Madness contest in DM 28 that were deemed below inferior as contest prizes [and thus banished from sight!] Hammer scrutinized and agonized over which group of gladiators were worth the sacks of gold coins he was prepared to release to the Gladiatorial Commission for fees to MAINTENANCE his new stable in the No-Tourney Arena. After what seemed like long hours passing by, Hammer discarded one and then another group of hopefuls. After lengthy debate a third was cast aside. Deciding between the final two groups found Hammer going back to interview the rejected candidates time and time again [until a final decision was made that Hammer could live with and his new stable could die with!] before the final quirks were hammered out and pen put to paper to process the prospective puny stable with the Gladiatorial Commission. The only solace gained from the painful process was the knowledge that other managers would be less tempted to run stables in DM 81 populated by their tourney- worthy warriors [under the penalty of death imposed and enforced upon tourney experienced gladiators by the Committee being formed to police and regulate such matters!] as sworn to and signed in good faith by each registering manager. [TIME JUMP] Hammer had worked long and hard to find suitable candidates for his stable and now it was time to begin their training. The paperwork had been dispatched for registration with the Gladiatorial Commission and now was the hour in which preparation was paramount! Dispatch riders had arrived with the news that Considerable Bounty was being offered as incentive rewards to those managers sending new stables to the No-Tourney Arena. Hammer realized this would Up the Ante [causing greater pause in the managerial community for selecting suitable stables!] as the creative competition was certain to escalate and produce Serious Sword Slinging Stables Staining the Arena Sands Red! Obviously a serious upgrade in the quality of competition migrating to the No- Tourney Arena in DM 81 would definitely work in favor of Hammer; enormously increasing the death toll percentage potential amongst the ranks of his new start-up stable in DM 81 [Sands Running Red and Blood Feuds Running Rampant as Undoubtedly Expected!] Hammer observed the futility of his new warriors training [as well as they could for what they were made from!] while recent memories came to the forefront of his mind! When the paperwork was nearly completed and names were selected for each Gladiator, Hammer decided to name the stable according to what he had discovered in the darkness while searching during the dismal hours of the desert night. These warriors would probably be more well suited to fight by Torch Light had they fallen into the possession of most other managers! Paper Warriors better suited to confronting Dark Arena Monsters [rather than being fed to the Gladiatorial Lions certain to be populating the regular No-Tourney Arena!] Specimens blatantly better suited for feeding upon agitated armadillo ants than for striving to attain recognition and fame in the No-Tourney Arena [or any arena!] Thus was AARDVARK HAMMERZ birthed and born for Greatness or Disgrace! [TIME JUMP] Dispatch riders on winged steeds brought the news Hammer had been awaiting! Not since the days of training on Noblish Island in DM 93 had Hammer encountered such collective enthusiasm for crossing blades in a selected arena such as DM 81 [recalling the time Hammer generated a gathering of newbies to transfer to Niatoli Island in DM 33 to match wits and cross blades with the assembling veterans upon graduation!] The Consortium had represented the veterans well in DM 33 with the SWEETNESS stable managed by Sweety Pie. Now the good news had arrived that The Consortium was seen registering a stable named LIFE IMPACTS in the No-Tourney Arena! Former alliance mates Darque and Kat had reportedly registered DARQUE AGES and KATHOUSE with the Gladiatorial Commission. Morya Madness combatant LePentarque from DM 28 had registered LA PENTARCHIE and longtime fixture Drake in North Fork DM 47 [recently returned from a lengthy hiatus] had been lured by the competition to register DRAKE'S HARDWARE. Deke [at the helm of DOC LEGRAND'S LAB] was instrumental in promoting the No- Tourney Arena by repeatedly negotiating terms with the Gladiatorial Commission. Others had laid the groundwork before him, but Deke raised the banner and carried it the final distance [Supported by Countless Managers too numerous to mention!] Salute Yourselves for Your Efforts are Most Graciously Applauded throughout Alastari! Apex had signed in with CAROLINA BLUE as had Ghab with ASSASSIN NATION. Another familiar name was found on the rolls as DeGotti registered CULT OF BACCHUS followed by DOOM KNIGHTS managed by Blackstorm. Also on the rolls to be noted were AS SEEN ON TV II managed by Indimar and RAGNAROK'S WOLVES by none other than ragnorokwolf. Nomad had signed on with PHANTOM REGIMENT and Silas followed suit with GRIFFONRAWL MMA. Another notable signature was that of MasterBeru with CHILDHOOD HEROES and a penchant for scribing Team Spotlights [A Plus in Any Arena!] Detective Kellumbo had followed the clues and was observed enroute to registering a yet unannounced stable [such are the ways of sleuthhounds and such!] Rumor had it that the manager known as Roadkill was on his way to register a stable after his namesake and Slugbait was close behind [obliviously lost in thought!] Finally [in no particular disorder!] managers Grimm, Woody, Terminator, Den and Bill were also seen elbowing their way through the gathering registration crowd to officially announce their participation in the No-Tourney Arena. COUNTLESS OTHER MANAGERS were known to be pondering the consequences of sending stables to a No-Tourney Arena and had yet to make the commitment public knowledge as to their intentions. Howbeit the Gladiatorial Commission was reportedly swamped with requests for New Stable Registration Forms [whether for the Tempe Facer or No-Tourney Arena was anybody's guess at the present time!] Judging from the furtive figures darting and ducking in the shadows and alleyways throughout Alastari [as well as those huddled in taverns or communicating with one another by various means available!] the success of such a No-Tourney Arena was Ballooning far Beyond the Expectations of the Promoters and Petitioners Bar None! HAMMER WAS UNDERSTANDABLY ENTHUSED BEYOND MEASURE BECAUSE the No-Tourney Arena had the Best Potential for attracting and assembling a congregation of competitors rivaling the numbers of Noblish Island from days gone by! JANUARY 2007 MARKS THE BEGINNING of a Journey where both Newbies and Veterans join together in a Historic Assemblage Celebrating the Crossing of Blades between some of the Best Managed Stables in all of Alastari [Known and Unknown!] "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper" Hammer Minister of War LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS CRAZYSKULL was dealt death by QUICKSILVER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight. THE OLD COBBLER was dealt death by SHEWISH GIANT in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel. IDONTWANNALIVE murdered SHEWISH GIANT in a 1 minute gruesome Dark Arena fight. FORGET IT was butchered by ARENAMASTER HARTH in a 1 minute gory Dark Arena contest. VOLLEYBALL was defeated by HART CRANE in a 1 minute master's Challenge match. BLACK TIGER vanquished FLAMING FLAMINGO in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight. MOLTEN METAL was beaten by BAD HANDWRITING in a 3 minute Challenge brawl. VULGE was handily defeated by MUSHIKU BO in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight. VINCENT outwaited DOILY in a crowd boring 7 minute Challenge duel. BLESSED BLUEJAY won victory over HAMSUN in a action packed 1 minute Challenge fight. BRUTUS was vanquished by BRAVOS in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight. HOOLIGAN overpowered MISASHI SAN in a popular 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee. LITTLE FLOWER luckily beat VICTOR in a 2 minute Challenge match. THE LEPER bested GREY GROUSE in a 2 minute Challenge conflict. CHASSIS was bested by RED ROBIN in a 4 minute novice's Challenge battle. SWIMMING overpowered BONEDUST in a popular 1 minute mismatched Title conflict. BULGAKOV was narrowly defeated by SHAMAN in a action packed 8 minute struggle. CROW BAR handily defeated NERVE RAKER in a 1 minute mismatched bout. WEST WIND devastated VENGEFUL VULTURE in a 1 minute one-sided brawl. HADRIAN was beaten by GRAVEYARD TAN in a 4 minute match. SHERWOOD was narrowly defeated by DR. DREAM in a exciting 7 minute bout. GLASS CEILING savagely defeated ROAD RUNNER in a crowd pleasing 3 minute conflict. LEAD beat MEGA ROKU in a 2 minute fight. TIBERIUS lost to CONRAD in a 2 minute match. SEVERO was savagely defeated by LURKER in a action packed 1 minute gruesome fray. BLEDD was devastated by FLOOR in a 1 minute one-sided bout. BLOODLUST luckily beat SYENDRAD in a exciting 2 minute beginner's fight. LACE was savagely defeated by DARLA in a 2 minute gory novice's duel. SILVERBLEED was demolished by SUNSHINE in a 1 minute one-sided melee. NETHERBORN vanquished WICCAN in a 1 minute one-sided fray. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |LUNGING ATTACK 13 TOTAL PARRY 34 - 16 - 0 68 | |STRIKING ATTACK 8 AIMED BLOW 18 - 13 - 1 58 | |BASHING ATTACK 6 WALL OF STEEL 27 - 23 - 1 54 | |SLASHING ATTACK 6 PARRY-LUNGE 16 - 14 - 0 53 | |TOTAL PARRY 5 BASHING ATTACK 22 - 26 - 0 46 | |PARRY-STRIKE 5 STRIKING ATTACK 29 - 37 - 1 44 | |PARRY-LUNGE 4 LUNGING ATTACK 42 - 54 - 3 44 | |AIMED BLOW 3 PARRY-STRIKE 15 - 20 - 0 43 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 3 PARRY-RIPOSTE 16 - 22 - 1 42 | |WALL OF STEEL 3 SLASHING ATTACK 26 - 37 - 1 41 | Turn 548 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: PARRY-LUNGE 4 - 0 LUNGING ATTACK 6 - 7 3 BASHING ATTACK AIMED BLOW 2 - 1 PARRY-STRIKE 2 - 3 2 LUNGING ATTACK STRIKING ATTACK 5 - 3 PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 2 1 PARRY-LUNGE TOTAL PARRY 3 - 2 BASHING ATTACK 2 - 4 1 SLASHING ATTACK WALL OF STEEL 1 - 2 1 TOTAL PARRY SLASHING ATTACK 1 - 5 1 STRIKING ATTACK 1 WALL OF STEEL 1 AIMED BLOW TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME BASHING ATTACK SWIMMING 5693 12 6 0 110 SPORTS (497) SLASHING ATTACK BONEDUST 6098 19 18 0 85 GRIM FANDANGO (454) TOTAL PARRY SHAMAN 1706 13 2 0 85 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) STRIKING ATTACK BLACK TIGER 1705 9 7 0 83 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) WALL OF STEEL BULGAKOV 6244 13 6 1 76 LITERATE LOONS (538) PARRY-LUNGE GRAVEYARD TAN 6278 10 4 0 48 GRIM FANDANGO (454) AIMED BLOW BRAVOS 6368 4 2 0 44 GRIM FANDANGO (454) PARRY-STRIKE DR. DREAM 1709 8 4 0 41 NOMADIC TRIBE (160) LUNGING ATTACK GLASS CEILING 6299 5 3 1 38 FEEBLE LEGION (547) FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME PARRY-RIPOSTE HADRIAN 6361 4 2 0 38 WARMASTERS (551) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is MUSHIKU BO 5713. The most popular warrior this turn was SHERWOOD 6208. The ten other most popular fighters were CHASSIS 6375, BULGAKOV 6244, GLASS CEILING 6299, SYENDRAD 6406, MOLTEN METAL 6333, LITTLE FLOWER 6367, MEGA ROKU 6091, VICTOR 6358, GREY GROUSE 4689, and SWIMMING 5693. The least popular fighter this week was VINCENT 6324. The other ten least popular fighters were WICCAN 6415, SILVERBLEED 6379, LACE 6404, BLEDD 6351, SEVERO 6359, ROAD RUNNER 6237, VENGEFUL VULTURE 4604, NERVE RAKER 1874, SHAMAN 1706, and BRUTUS 6360.