DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER Date : 10/08/2003 Duedate: 10/21/2003 SOLVEN ARENA DM-22 TURN-466 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS HOMELESS PRINCE KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) (22-6012) [15-2-0,157] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader HOMELESS PRINCE MCGRORY KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) BREMEN SIX DAY (678) (22-6012) [15-2-0,157] (22-5976) [4-1-1,46] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite MORGAN WOF-A-MIT WOMEN OF REALITY (669) ROCK ETTS (595) (22-5915) [13-13-1,83] (22-5639) [19-17-0,100] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM SERPENTINE INC. (85) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. SERPENTINE INC. (85) 31 2. ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) 27 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) 3. THE REPUBLICANS (103) 24 Unchartered Team 4. THE ZOO (205) 23 5. BREMEN SIX DAY (678) 224-LETTER CURSE WORDS (663) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1/ 1*4-LETTER CURSE WOR (663) 2 0 0 100 1/ 2 SERPENTINE INC. (85) 11 4 1 2/ 2*BREMEN SIX DAY (678) 5 2 1 71.4 2/ 3 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) 9 5 1 3/ 3 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) 63 35 3 64.3 3/ 1 THE DEMOCRATS (202) 9 6 0 4/ 4 ROCK ETTS (595) 396 273 7 59.2 4/ 6 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) 8 3 0 5/ 5 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) 103 74 6 58.2 5/ 4 THE ZOO (205) 7 8 0 6/ 0*SAVAGE HEARTS (358) 9 7 2 56.3 6/ 9 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) 6 4 0 7/ 6 SERPENTINE INC. (85) 119 93 6 56.1 7/ 5 THE REPUBLICANS (103) 6 9 1 8/ 7 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) 97 86 2 53.0 8/ 7 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) 6 9 0 9/ 8 THE REPUBLICANS (103) 296 276 23 51.7 9- 8*DUNCES UNITED (687) 3 7 1 10/ 9 THE DEMOCRATS (202) 93 89 7 51.1 10/11 ROCK ETTS (595) 3 8 0 11/11 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) 43 44 1 49.4 11/12*4-LETTER CURSE WOR (663) 2 0 0 12/10 OLD MCDONALD (621) 253 263 13 49.0 12/13*BREMEN SIX DAY (678) 2 1 1 13-12 SWEET MARINES (325) 91 111 5 45.0 13/ 0*SAVAGE HEARTS (358) 1 4 1 14/13 THE ZOO (205) 319 409 4 43.8 14/10 OLD MCDONALD (621) 1 8 1 15-14*DUNCES UNITED (687) 10 20 3 33.3 15-14 SWEET MARINES (325) 0 2 0 16/ 0*WAY OF THE SWORD C (688) 0 1 0 0.0 16/ 0*WAY OF THE SWORD C (688) 0 1 0 17/ 0*BLOOD OF THE RAT (690) 0 1 0 0.0 17/ 0*BLOOD OF THE RAT (690) 0 1 0 Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank TEAM SPOTLIGHT + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Aruaki Clanhold #119 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ + Tobir: Karanjal of Zorpunt held the invitation to adventure while Daisy January swung the hammer with more determination than skill. He would have felt safer if HE had been the one with the hammer, but there was no arguing with a determined woman who didn't want to listen. But if "safe" had been something that really mattered to him, he'd never have become a gladiator. "You really expect someone to respond to this...invitation to disaster?" he asked. "Not anyone with YOUR attitude. It's an invitation to ADVENTURE. To explore the whole issue of why Krael is attacking coastal towns. And yes," Daisy said calmly, "I DO expect people to respond." She glanced over her shoulder at him, then stepped away from the wall. "You should know how bored warriors can get on the Isle, after all. Karanjal shrugged, but he could hardly argue with that. "You'd better have a definite plan," he warned her. "I do. I'll tell you about it over lunch." She set off briskly toward a small cafe the gladiators in Tobir favored. "Tell me while we walk," he suggested. "I can't bear to wait that long." "Ha ha. Like this was some huge city that it would take more than ten minutes to walk across." She frowned straight ahead, then shrugged slightly. "Okay. This won't be the first time gladiators have investigated Krael, you know. There was a group from Point and Iaye that set out to do that several years ago--" "I don't think I ever heard of that," Karanjal admitted. "What happened?" "It was hard to find out." She ducked under the awning that protected the front of the cafe and made for a booth against the far wall. When Karanjal slid in across from her, she said, "I had a hard time finding any information about it--" To the waiter she said, "Pizza with everything, I don't want to piss off the pizza guys." Her companion frowned. "Is this a joke?" "Hey, the Pizza Guys here in Tobir carry swords! I don't want them mad at me!" "If you say so. What about Krael?" "I did manage to find one of the gladiators that went on that expedition, and he said--well, he said a lot of stuff, but the important thing was that some kind of time shift occurred, and when they came back to OUR time from the last days of Krael, someone from then came too." "Oh...shoot," Karanjal said softly. "I don't like where I think this is going. There were a lot of wizards in Krael, especially in the 'last days'. If one of THEM came to our time...." "Exactly. Quite a possible adventure, don't you think?" + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Andorians Abroad #16 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ + Possibly Zuwayza: It seemed to take Tankesh forever to fall out of the Gate, his motion slowed to the point where he wasn't even sure he was moving at all. And then there was a sort of soundless click, and the floor came up fast and hard, knocking the breath out of him as he hit and rolled. Voices speaking akkhadic, upper-class accents. Shouting. No time to sort things out. Gasping for breath but too well-trained to pause, he rolled to his feet with his sword out, ending crouched and ready for anything. By the grace of all the gods, he was face to face with the Karnhorn vizier, Khannarth. The man who had betrayed his city and his ruler, plotted with the Satrap's First Wife to turn over the Zuwayza to the minions of Inzolas, tried to have the Satrap's Second Wife and Tankesh killed..... Ah, it was GOOD to be here, now, and ready. The Vizier was looking past him and commanding someone to "get him!" Right, voices, plural. Other people in the room. Probably guards. Tankesh took a quick slash at the retreating Vizier; not a killing blow, but he felt the resistance of clothing and flesh. Continued the motion into a turn. Right, guards. Two...three. Startled by his arrival out of nowhere, not expecting him to come around so fast. The first man would never have a chance to adjust his thinking; the slash aimed at HIM gutted him and nearly cut him in two. The second was a little farther back. He might recover, if he got the bleeding stopped in time. But with only one hand left to use, that wasn't likely. Shocked by the unexpected and extreme violence, he was out of the fight. Khannarth was screaming orders behind him, and the third man was leveling his spear for a charge. Stupid weapon to carry indoors, maybe it was tradition, maybe it was just ornamental, didn't matter. Tankesh edged to the right, drawing the spearman's attention with him. When the man was fully committed, all his momentum focused into the charge, Tankesh ducked to the left. Tripped over his first victim but rolled and came up again, whacked the spear in two in passing, kicked the man in the belly as his charge brought him within range, and turned to face Khannarth again. The Vizier was holding his robes against a bleeding chest wound with one hand and tugging on a bell-pull with the other. Tankesh lunged closer and cut through bell rope. And then froze as a man with a cocked and ready crossbow appeared in the doorway behind the Vizier. More than one man, and several with crossbows. Karnhorns, of course. Damn. They were all dressed alike, no doubt a uniform, but not the same as worn by the three guards he'd just dealt with. Khannarth began babbling out accusations and orders. The first of the newcomers silenced him with a curt word. "You will BOTH explain yourself to the Exalted Satrap, may His justice be swift and sure," the man said. He gestured them out into the hallway with his crossbow. "Now." DUELMASTER'S COLUMN Notes from the arena champ. Gather 'round, gather 'round. Don't be shy. The fire is warm and cozy and the keg has just been tapped. Help yourself. The leaves are just starting to fall, and I know you all can feel the crisp fall air calling out "tourney time, tourney time." Your humble Duelmaster, Homeless Prince, here for yet another biweekly fireside chat. Old business first. Sorry Al, but Gary Condit put up just the amount of fight I was hoping for. I was really hoping he would teach me a bit more, but, ah well, I suppose bashers only know so much. Kudos last turn go out to Monty Python for his decisive victory over Pishtush. That is a great win in my book. Good enough to deserve a shot at the title? You'll just have to read on a bit to find out. This week's Boos and Hisses go out to, how ironically, Hiss. Can you fight anyone but Platinum? I am starting to wonder. Lastly, on the topic of old business, did you notice Conspiracy Inc. showing up out of nowhere? Welcome back to the arena! Too bad it looks like Edwin Meese just mistimed the upcoming tourney. Maybe some of your other warriors are better timed. On to the new business. This week's avoids look a little different than the past few weeks. One goes out to Serpentine Inc. on the strong showing of Snake in the Grass (Ok, beating Turkey Joe isn't that strong, but it sounds good) and especially Monty Python. Hopefully I will graduate and be gone before I have to dance with either of you two. The other avoid goes out to that new wildcard of a team, Conspiracy Inc. Luckily Pishtush dropped down out of the CC's, or I would have had a bit of a dilemma. Of course, if there are avoids, there are challenges! This weeks TV challenge goes out to...How--Lite. Sorry How--Lite, if you are not avoiding, you should be. The rest of the CC's are looking mighty tough these days. A graduating (sandbagged?) lunger, another lunger who did well in the same tourney as me last time, a PR who kicked major butt last turn, just to name a few. That only leaves Judge's guy (never, in a million years will you get a shot at the throne if we can help it), and a few bashers. Hate to pick on you again How--Lite, but the choices are slim.... Hopefully the results will be the same as last time. Well, this turn is a big one for me. If I win, I tie the record for most consecutive turns as Duelmaster, with five. I am thinking I will be outta here with 20 fights, so I don't have much time left to sit on this throne. Gotta make the most of it. Who knows, with a little luck, six or seven turns as DM is not out of the question. Well Solven, gotta run. And how's this for a change, instead of shout out's to all the things that make this a great arena, how about a short list of what really irks me. 1) People who sign their name to personal ads, who we have no idea who they are. Is it so hard to sign your team name after your manager name if it is not obvious (like Andorian Wimps being run by Wimpy)? 2) People whining about downchallenging. It is part of the game. Be a man like Judge said, and do something about it. Nothing is stopping you from doing the same. 3) Serpentine Inc. getting a free pass from the verbal abuse from the arena on down- challenging just because they don't talk in the personal ads. 4) Wimpy, and that knife in my back. 5) The Democrats having such a darn good run lately... Well, that is enough for now. Looking forward to this little chat with you all again next turn. -- Homeless Prince SPY REPORT Hail and well met warriors of SOLVEN! Know me for who I am, Zontani Sharp Eyes, Spymaster extraordinaire of all Alastari. Former top team THE DEMOCRATS was unseated this week as SERPENTINE INC. moved up from 2nd ranking to take the top spot with a 4-1-0 record for the round. Fortune did not smile upon OLD MCDONALD this time out who this turn suffered a fall into 14th position in the wake of a 0-4-0 round. Warriors--remember that glory waits always around the corner! Witness how this week CONSPIRACY INC. went 3-2-0 to move up 3 in the rankings. My praise to SERPENTINE INC. for their 4-1-0 week this time out. Indeed, it was a skillfully fought round deserving of notice! BEAR MARKET caught the eye of many in the gladiatorial commission as she skillfully bested ROBERT BORK and was awarded 25 points in recognition. Most watched of the fights this week, the spotlight was on HOW--LITE as she bore arms against the TV challenge of reigning Duelmaster HOMELESS PRINCE. Although HOW--LITE made a valiant effort, it did not suffice to topple the reign of victorious HOMELESS PRINCE. Heed this! A seer has warned that if exactly 6 die in duels this week, the whole city shall perish! Just remember...5 or 7! Many and various are the arts of battle. In SOLVEN "art" is a word that has long since passed from the language! I saw one fighter that warriors avoided when this week's challenge seeking began. KELLUMBO'S KIDS is feared. This much I can say. Methinks more than a few here could name the guild it was that spent the better part of last week avoiding KELLUMBO'S KIDS. Indeed it was THE REPUBLICANS. Loose talk at the arena has reached my ears and it but confirms the knowledge that many fighters are after ROBERT BYRD. Watch your back! A match that raised a few eyebrows at the games this week, it seems that JUDITH posted a challenge against the more highly recognized JFK. The results, you ask? Well, the firebrand JUDITH won victory over JFK. Remember warriors, this is the discipline of steel. I can not but mention with disdain the name of HISS who this week posted a TV challenge to a warrior a full 14 points below in the rankings. I thought HISS showed great skill and promise when it defeated PLATINUM. All right, so I slept through it! Big deal! Is not Death a warrior's foremost adviser? Warriors, may this counselor stand ready at your right hand forever! Some guilds are strict but few are as heartless as SAVAGE HEARTS. Witness, last turn they sent TERMINATOR, a 2-0-0 fighter, to the Dark Arena! Was I the only one shocked to see the well respected fighter PREDATOR (2-0-0) appear on the sands of the Dark Arena? It is now dead. ALIEN has sworn to take up religion upon living to tell of its recent bout with the Dark Arena horrors. A rare thing indeed! Perhaps even the strong cannot escape the vagaries of this world. This week arena veteran BLIND BOY was slain, despite a 6-4-0 record. Some say a warrior is judged by the way he bears arms. One thing is sure, better a dagger in hand then a sword on the belt! The girls are as pretty in SOLVEN as ever I remembered them....and the fighters as ugly! Don't let your reputation slip! Sadly warriors, now longer can I keep thy company nor savor the ale of thy fine city. Depart I must and soon! Till we meet again, remember: a turtle walks slow, hides head in a shell, and harms no one; a lion runs to slay its prey.-- Zontani Sharp Eyes DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME HOMELESS PRINCE 6012 15 2 0 157 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME GUANTANAMO BAY 5826 22 18 0 145 THE REPUBLICANS (103) MONTY PYTHON 5939 16 6 0 121 SERPENTINE INC. (85) SNAKE IN THE GRASS 5952 15 4 0 111 SERPENTINE INC. (85) JUDITH 5832 21 17 0 108 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) EDWIN MEESE 828 23 15 4 100 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) WOF-A-MIT 5639 19 17 0 100 ROCK ETTS (595) BEAR MARKET 6010 8 9 1 100 THE DEMOCRATS (202) HOW--LITE 5635 21 16 1 96 ROCK ETTS (595) PISHTUSH 5651 15 3 0 91 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME JFK 1660 18 18 1 87 THE DEMOCRATS (202) TOYS 5679 19 24 5 86 OLD MCDONALD (621) JUSTICE 5949 14 8 0 84 THE REPUBLICANS (103) GARY CONDIT 5914 13 16 1 84 THE DEMOCRATS (202) BISCUIT 5678 20 22 1 83 OLD MCDONALD (621) MORGAN 5915 13 13 1 83 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) DARKLE 5709 10 3 0 83 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) MAXIMUS 5966 16 3 3 80 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) TURKEY JOE 5825 16 28 0 80 THE ZOO (205) ROBERT BYRD 6039 7 4 0 80 THE DEMOCRATS (202) TWO PLUS TWO 5910 13 9 1 78 OLD MCDONALD (621) LEE 5831 14 23 0 72 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) HISS 6017 12 1 0 70 SERPENTINE INC. (85) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME KANGAROO KATE 5900 14 23 1 66 THE ZOO (205) SKEEMER 5965 12 8 0 57 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME FLAT TAX 5998 8 10 0 55 THE REPUBLICANS (103) PLATINUM 5677 9 21 1 54 ROCK ETTS (595) MCGRORY 5976 4 1 1 46 BREMEN SIX DAY (678) RUMSFELD 6032 4 8 0 46 THE REPUBLICANS (103) BLIND GIRL 6041 9 1 0 44 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) GEORGE BUSH 1708 7 4 0 44 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) -RECON ROSE 5293 7 8 0 44 SWEET MARINES (325) SCHWARZENEGGER 6050 4 5 1 37 THE REPUBLICANS (103) MACRIBSI 6024 6 4 0 34 OLD MCDONALD (621) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME DIDILY SQUAT 6066 4 2 0 33 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) ALIEN 3265 2 1 1 33 SAVAGE HEARTS (358) -MAJOR DAISY 5943 7 3 0 31 SWEET MARINES (325) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -IGNATIUS 6092 1 0 0 23 DUNCES UNITED (687) NANCY PELOSI 6076 3 1 0 22 THE DEMOCRATS (202) ZELORA 6068 3 2 0 22 THE ZOO (205) GARDEN GNOME 6095 2 0 0 20 THE ZOO (205) BARB 6060 3 3 0 19 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) RATTLER 6075 2 1 1 19 SERPENTINE INC. (85) SHUX 5788 2 0 0 17 4-LETTER CURSE WORDS (663) -NONSENTIA 6062 2 4 1 11 DUNCES UNITED (687) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -DORKUS MAJORUS 6074 2 2 1 11 DUNCES UNITED (687) -SIMPLISSITUS 6061 2 4 1 11 DUNCES UNITED (687) VENOM 6059 2 4 0 10 SERPENTINE INC. (85) MARIE 6077 2 0 0 10 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) ELAINE CHAO 6104 1 0 0 10 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) BORENSEN 6091 0 1 0 9 BLOOD OF THE RAT (690) SAVAGE DRAGON 3263 2 2 0 8 SAVAGE HEARTS (358) SANDSTONE 6056 2 1 0 8 ROCK ETTS (595) -COLONEL HUGS 6000 1 3 1 8 SWEET MARINES (325) ANTHONY SCALIA 6103 1 0 0 5 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) -NOTHSTEIN 5977 1 1 0 4 BREMEN SIX DAY (678) SNARF 6093 0 2 0 2 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) NERF 6105 0 1 0 1 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) -PRIVATE ROOM 6086 0 1 0 1 SWEET MARINES (325) STAEL 6071 0 1 0 1 WAY OF THE SWORD C5 (688) GIREFFY 6102 0 1 0 1 THE ZOO (205) -PRIVATE KISS 6085 0 1 0 1 SWEET MARINES (325) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? KORGE, SHEWISH GI 404 0 1 0 DARK ARENA 0 ALIEN 3265 466 NONE DEMENTIA 6067 2 2 0 DUNCES UNITED 687 RATTLER 6075 464 REVENGED BLIND BOY 6042 6 4 0 KELLUMBO'S KIDS 676 MCGRORY 5976 466 MISTER SINISTER 3266 1 2 1 SAVAGE HEARTS 358 STONE GOLEM 409 466 NONE TERMINATOR 3262 2 1 0 SAVAGE HEARTS 358 WURM KIN 410 466 NONE PREDATOR 3264 2 1 0 SAVAGE HEARTS 358 MOUNTAIN TROLL 401 466 NONE INARINDA 5913 8 21 1 THE ZOO 205 MAXIMUS 5966 465 VILMA 6040 3 6 0 THE ZOO 205 SCHWARZENEGGER 6050 464 PERSONAL ADS Shux -- A curse on you. Also a pox. -- Snarf Monty Python -- Boy, after the workout you gave me, I believe that you are the Full Monty. -- Pishtush Flat Tax -- It would have been nice if you could have taught a few skills to your manager's TOGS partner's fighter. Say again? -- Darkle Dorkus Majorus -- While it doesn't mean <my name> to me but Wimpy thinks you belong on the Wimps. Your name and lack of talent are two of the reasons he thinks so. -- Didily Squat All -- I guess I should have included Serpentine in the love note I sent to Killumbo last turn. Down 7 and 27 even surpasses what Killumbo can do. You guys are sure strange. A little like Miami challenging The Little Sisters of the Poor. Really honorable. -- Wimpy Rude Buddha -- Scare you? I don't even know who you are. And for that matter, I think everyone in the arena should fight how they want. I certainly wouldn't get in your way. Unless you happened to be challenging me...then that is a different story. Happy hunting. -- Detective Kellumbo Schwarzenegger -- Ah, but you made that close. Too many more fights like that and the Blind Twins won't stand a chance. Gotta get you while I can. -- DK Kangaroo Kate -- Why did you have to go and get my hopes up like that, getting desperate and all? Maybe next time. -- Blind Boy Ghost of Inarinda -- Sorry about that. Maximus seems to have a certain bloodlust to him. I hope her replacement is more to your liking. -- Detective Kullumbo Wimpy -- There is an old saying: Don't insult the alligator until after you have crossed the bridge. How convenient of you to lay the verbal smackdown just before you are getting ready to leave. I at least thought you had enough guts to say what you thought all along, and not wait until you are getting ready to run out of the arena. Good thing for you, because if you stick around, you just jumped way to the top of the list of people whose ass I am going to kick. -- Kellumbo With all the hate talk of me lately, has anyone else noticed the challenging tendencies of Serpentine Inc., or is it OK because they are quiet in the arena? -- DK Judge -- Hey, check it out, the Blind Twins both challenged UP last turn. At this rate I only need about 9 months or so to come out even. :) -- Kellumbo Snake in the Grass -- I hope you fare better than a distant colleague of mine who shared your, er, inspiration. I refer to the late and lamented N.D. Grasse of Punny Animals in Willaf. He was game but somebody scotched him. Why the should do that rather than, for instance, Irish him, I don't know, but so it was. -- Turkey Joe, just rambling P.S. I never beg for mercy in the autumn. Don't want to draw attention to myself, you know. It's a risky season. Blind Boy -- "See" that you mind your manners, boy, or next time I won't whisper skills in your flapping ears. -- Kangaroo Kate Maximus -- Heck. -- Ghost of Inarinda P.S. There's too much death going around lately. Sandstone -- Us gnomes have no trouble with sandstone. An easy job. Granite, now, is another matter. -- Garden Gnome Robyn -- I was, er, trying to make you red-breasted. Yeah, that was it, just a sartorial statement. -- Zelora Rude Buddha -- It's possible to have a lot of fun while lying down. -- Zelora How-Lite -- Speed versus speed. I feel lucky to have won. -- Guantanamo Bay Darkle -- Good fight, and good victory. You made Wimpy proud. -- Flat Tax The Zoo -- Our condolences to Inarinda. She was executed by a cancer in our arena. -- The Republicans P.S. Sorry about Vilma two turns ago. Schwarzenegger got confused and thought you were Gray Davis' wife. Bear Market -- I call that victory the "Running of the Bulls." -- Justice Wimpy -- Don't leave before getting your pound of flesh. You have support here, use it. -- Al Gore Dorkus -- That was a good fight though. -- Nancy Pelosi Justice -- Good matchup. See you around. -- B.M. Mcgrory -- No perfect record for you. Ha ha! Thanks for the skills also. -- Al Gore Lee -- Awesome fight! If Byrd was as smart as he is old he would have pulled his backup and won. Maybe next time. -- Al Gore Conspiracy Inc. -- Welcome back! -- Al Gore Welcome to the new teams! Fight well and often. -- Al Gore 9 September 2003 WE'RE LOOKING FOR A FEW GOOD MANAGERS! If you think you have what it takes to match wits and blades with some of the best managers in Alastari, then WE WANT YOU! The Tournament Of The Golden Scrod #4 will begin in Aradi (DM 60) the turn after the Fall Mail-In. It's not too late for you to sign up. I realize that many of you may be hesitant after seeing that myself and Hombre have teamed up again, but we'll try to take it easy on you guys a little bit. For more information on T#%S IV, please contact me at ganolus@aol.com. We're looking for a few good managers...the few, the proud, the TOGS! -- Ganolus Oakleaf, T#%S IV Commish 15 September 2003 An Announcement Concerning the Brotherhood of the Blade Alliance: I have chosen to withdraw my membership from the Brotherhood of the Blade alliance. The years I have spent in the alliance have been the best of my DM career. I leave the alliance with many great friends and will always remain close to my former brethren. The Brotherhood of the Blade will not skip a beat without my membership. It remains in very capable hands and its roster is among the strongest in the game. With the return on some of its founding members to DM, I know the BOB will continue to grow in strength and prestige in the years to come. -- The Sandman 29 September 2003 All -- Let it be known that the Firm accepts SOL into its ranks. The Firm is: SunGod, Dark Spirit, Youngblood, Tripwire, and SOL. LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS MISTER SINISTER was butchered by STONE GOLEM in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight. TERMINATOR was butchered by WURM KIN in a 2 minute brutal Dark Arena duel. PREDATOR was easily killed by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a popular 2 minute Dark Arena match. ALIEN viciously butchered KORGE, SHEWISH GIANT in a 1 minute Dark Arena contest. HOMELESS PRINCE demolished HOW--LITE in a 1 minute Challenge Title competition. HISS viciously subdued PLATINUM in a crowd pleasing 4 minute bloody Challenge match. GUANTANAMO BAY overpowered EDWIN MEESE in a 1 minute uneven Challenge melee. JUDITH vanquished JFK in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel. JUSTICE was savagely defeated by WOF-A-MIT in a 5 minute expert's Challenge duel. BEAR MARKET savagely defeated ROBERT BORK in a popular 3 minute gory Challenge melee. GARY CONDIT was demolished by SNAKE IN THE GRASS in a 1 minute Challenge match. ROBERT BYRD handily defeated SKEEMER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest. BLIND GIRL luckily beat SCHWARZENEGGER in a 4 minute Challenge conflict. RUMSFELD vanquished NANCY PELOSI in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout. SHUX savagely defeated VENOM in a crowd pleasing 1 minute bloody Challenge brawl. DIDILY SQUAT overpowered MACRIBSI in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge bout. SNARF was overpowered by GARDEN GNOME in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout. MONTY PYTHON overpowered TOYS in a 2 minute bloody mismatched conflict. LEE was beaten by DARKLE in a exciting 3 minute uneven fight. MORGAN beat KANGAROO KATE in a action packed 1 minute expert's fray. TURKEY JOE devastated FLAT TAX in a 1 minute one-sided bout. TWO PLUS TWO was outlasted by PISHTUSH in a tiresome 16 minute expert's fight. BISCUIT was narrowly defeated by MAXIMUS in a 7 minute gory veteran's duel. GEORGE BUSH demolished BARB in a 1 minute one-sided melee. BLIND BOY was viciously butchered by MCGRORY in a 1 minute gory fray. SAVAGE DRAGON was overcome by RATTLER in a action packed 3 minute amateur's bout. ZELORA overpowered SHIFTYEYED VOLUNTEER in a 1 minute one-sided fight. MARIE won victory over STAEL in a 2 minute novice's fray. SANDSTONE beat NERF in a 5 minute novice's match. BORENSEN was defeated by ANTHONY SCALIA in a 3 minute gory novice's bout. GIREFFY was handily defeated by ELAINE CHAO in a 1 minute mismatched match. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |LUNGING ATTACK 12 STRIKING ATTACK 39 - 25 - 1 61 | |TOTAL PARRY 11 TOTAL PARRY 45 - 30 - 3 60 | |STRIKING ATTACK 7 PARRY-RIPOSTE 14 - 10 - 0 58 | |PARRY-LUNGE 6 AIMED BLOW 16 - 13 - 1 55 | |WALL OF STEEL 5 LUNGING ATTACK 41 - 41 - 2 50 | |AIMED BLOW 4 PARRY-LUNGE 29 - 32 - 3 48 | |BASHING ATTACK 4 WALL OF STEEL 15 - 19 - 0 44 | |SLASHING ATTACK 3 BASHING ATTACK 25 - 35 - 3 42 | |PARRY-STRIKE 3 PARRY-STRIKE 6 - 9 - 0 40 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 SLASHING ATTACK 10 - 21 - 0 32 | Turn 466 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 - 0 TOTAL PARRY 5 - 6 2 STRIKING ATTACK AIMED BLOW 3 - 1 LUNGING ATTACK 5 - 7 2 LUNGING ATTACK STRIKING ATTACK 5 - 2 PARRY-STRIKE 1 - 2 2 BASHING ATTACK SLASHING ATTACK 2 - 1 BASHING ATTACK 1 - 3 2 SLASHING ATTACK PARRY-LUNGE 3 - 3 WALL OF STEEL 1 - 4 1 PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 PARRY-LUNGE 1 TOTAL PARRY TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME STRIKING ATTACK HOMELESS PRINCE 6012 15 2 0 157 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) PARRY-RIPOSTE MONTY PYTHON 5939 16 6 0 121 SERPENTINE INC. (85) LUNGING ATTACK SNAKE IN THE GRASS 5952 15 4 0 111 SERPENTINE INC. (85) BASHING ATTACK JUDITH 5832 21 17 0 108 WOMEN OF REALITY (669) PARRY-LUNGE WOF-A-MIT 5639 19 17 0 100 ROCK ETTS (595) SLASHING ATTACK HOW--LITE 5635 21 16 1 96 ROCK ETTS (595) TOTAL PARRY PISHTUSH 5651 15 3 0 91 ANDORIAN WIMPS (651) WALL OF STEEL JUSTICE 5949 14 8 0 84 THE REPUBLICANS (103) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is MORGAN 5915. The most popular warrior this turn was WOF-A-MIT 5639. The ten other most popular fighters were BEAR MARKET 6010, SCHWARZENEGGER 6050, JUSTICE 5949, DARKLE 5709, RATTLER 6075, HISS 6017, HOMELESS PRINCE 6012, BISCUIT 5678, MARIE 6077, and ROBERT BYRD 6039. The least popular fighter this week was TWO PLUS TWO 5910. The other ten least popular fighters were PISHTUSH 5651, GIREFFY 6102, SANDSTONE 6056, BLIND BOY 6042, BARB 6060, FLAT TAX 5998, TOYS 5679, SNARF 6093, MACRIBSI 6024, and SKEEMER 5965. The following warriors have traveled to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after fighting this turn: ROBERT BORK (22-920) CONSPIRACY INC. (100) NEW GRADUATES--FROM ALL ARENAS (INCLUDING CLOSED ARENAS) For those of you who keep track of such things, 18 additional warriors graduated from regular DM arenas (including closed arenas) since the last tournament: CAFFEINE JUNKIE (3-6110) ADDICTED CATFISH HUNTER (5-3315) PARTY ANIMALS MATTAHOOPLE (16-4203) GIFTED GODS SWEET JANE (53-6535) THE DARK TEMPLE LIL NOIR (62-3311) ENIGMA NARCISSISTIC NUN (69-8644) ODD SQUAD LEGION '8' (71-2369) D.O.A. RAW SEX APPEAL (82-1331) WHY WE LOVE TUM ZOMBIE STOMP (82-2617) NO MORE TEARS VIOLENT VOLE (82-4565) MAMMAL MILITIA LADY OF THE MOON (82-5481) HARM NONE KAMIKAZI GNAT (82-6073) DEADLY ATTACKS II THE 13TH WARRIOR (82-6346) STOOPID MOVIES SIRTON (82-9190) I AM SUCK DUNE (82-10414) 4-LETTER EPICS FLEM (82-12614) 4-LETTER FLUIDS GREENHOUSE EFFECT (82-12996) GLOBAL WARMING UGLY (82-14501) 4-LETTER DESCRIPTION -- Green Eyes