DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER Date : 05/05/2004 Duedate: 05/18/2004 SOLVEN ARENA DM-22 TURN-481 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS SKEEMER KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) (22-5965) [21-13-0,117] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader SKEEMER EASY BREEZE KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) JUST CHILLIN (699) (22-5965) [21-13-0,117] (22-6173) [6-3-1,62] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite RUMSFELD MAYBE LATER THE REPUBLICANS (103) JUST CHILLIN (699) (22-6032) [13-14-0,115] (22-6176) [6-3-1,57] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. DROP THE LEASH (701) 43 2. K FORCE (706) 42 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) 3. JUST CHILLIN (699) 39 Unchartered Team 4. SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) 34 5. THE REPUBLICANS (103) 31 K FORCE (706) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1/ 0*K FORCE (706) 4 1 1 80.0 1/ 1 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) 13 2 0 2/ 2 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) 114 58 4 66.3 2/ 3*JUST CHILLIN (699) 10 5 2 3/ 1 THE POISON CLAN (692) 36 19 1 65.5 3/ 6 SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) 10 5 0 4/ 3*JUST CHILLIN (699) 28 17 3 62.2 4/ 4 THE DEMOCRATS (202) 9 6 1 5/ 4 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) 142 109 10 56.6 5/ 8 BIBLE BELTERS (364) 8 6 0 6/ 6 THE REPUBLICANS (103) 335 311 23 51.9 6/ 2 THE POISON CLAN (692) 8 7 0 7/ 5 THE DEMOCRATS (202) 133 124 9 51.8 7/ 5 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) 5 9 2 8/ 7 BIBLE BELTERS (364) 30 29 1 50.8 8/ 9 THE ZOO (205) 5 10 1 9/ 0*WHY (708) 1 1 0 50.0 9/ 7*CHINESE CONNECTION (700) 5 10 0 10/ 8 THE ZOO (205) 342 460 5 42.6 10/ 0*K FORCE (706) 4 1 1 11/ 9*CHINESE CONNECTION (700) 15 23 0 39.5 11/10 THE REPUBLICANS (103) 4 11 0 12/10 SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) 17 33 1 34.0 12/ 0*WHY (708) 1 1 0 13/ 0*DROP THE LEASH (701) 1 4 0 20.0 13/ 0*DROP THE LEASH (701) 1 4 0 14/ 0*WHITE WOLF (707) 1 4 0 20.0 14/ 0*WHITE WOLF (707) 1 4 0 '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank TEAM SPOTLIGHT + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Out of the Past #7 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ + Andorian Edition Aruak City: "First, gather information," Adeolar muttered. It was one of the basic rules that the more information you had relevant to your problem, the better your chance was of solving it. She frowned at her gilt-framed magic mirror, twisting a lock of hair thoughtfully as she considered how to make best use of it. It was still working, after a fashion, but the reddish film tainting the glass was stronger. It confused the images, and she suspected that it also indicated something more dangerous than misreading a scene: that the spell which it embodied was being contaminated by blood magic, as well. Contaminated, and maybe distorted, maybe even subverted. Did she dare use the mirror spell now? Did she dare NOT use it? She needed information to plan her campaign against Khaldren. She shook her head and wiped at the red-tinged glass once more. She would just have to-- "Ma'am?" She glanced over her shoulder as Segallion Sundancer, one of her warriors, looked into the room. His countrywoman Nila was with him. "Nila and I were wondering if we could help, ma'am. You being a sun priestess, and us being temple staff of the Sun Temple on Korvant Isle, well, we thought we might be...compatible." "Oh. Hmm." Adie frowned, her fingers automatically going to one of her curls and twisting it as she considered the possibilities. The worship of the sun as performed in the western Karian states was not at all like that of her own tradition, but it might work. It might, at least, be worth trying. "Perhaps," she said finally. "Let's set it up this way: I'll start on my own, and if I don't need your help, you keep out of it-- It's too dangerous to mix in if you aren't needed," she added sternly as Segallion opened his mouth to protest. "But you be READY, and if I need help, I'll signal you." Maybe she would, but maybe not. It WAS dangerous, and neither gladiator had achieved Sheila Greywand's immortality yet. But she understood the need to be helpful, and she might not have to make use of their aid. When both gladiators nodded agreement, she turned back to her mirror. Carefully, with every aspect of the spell observed meticulously--something that wasn't necessary under better times, because spells were normally all of a piece and could "take a hint," as it were--she began the incantation that would activate the mirror. The surface shimmered crimson silver, glittering and trembling. This was NOT the normal behavior of a mirror spell! It felt as though she was trying to lift a great weight with her mind. She had never thought of the veil between HERE and THERE as a weight before.... Abruptly the glass cleared, or nearly so, a reddish film remained. And there was risen Krael as she had seen it before. But this time she was not interested in the general view. It was an accepted law of magic that for every strength a magician or wizard had, there was a corresponding weakness. Khaldren had come into the present from Krael, and somewhere in that city she hoped to find a clue to his power and his weakness. There was the ancient city, mud-stained and battered by the centuries it had spent sunk beneath the Trier. There the survivors, moving about their tasks which seemed inexplicable but must be linked in some way to Khaldren. She selected one of the better-dressed men and began to follow him through the ruins. His course was erratic, she thought at first it was to avoid the obstacles presented by the city's decrepit state. But he climbed over the mound of rubble that represented a fallen wall, and splashed through a knee-deep pool of water and mud. There were easier ways to get from one point to another, so why...? The man met up with another, handed over a...she couldn't see what, a crystal of some sort, and sat down on a stone to wring out the hem of his robe. The other man set off across the rubble. With a cold shock, Adie realized that the movement of these men, and others in Krael, were themselves parts of a spell. What kind of spell would be produced by somatic components on such a scale? A very powerful one.... Were the other "risen cities" involved in this? Celestinvael had been mentioned, and Old Valamantis. Adie turned her mirror-sight to the south. She was marginally aware that behind her the two gladiators began to dance and chant. Near Ardivent: Master Cho, former manager of the Bluvalley Warriors of Ardivent and Chan Chi Monastery of Khalhums, sipped his wine and nodded approval. "Very good. Quite drinkable, in fact." Fandil, former manager of the Fandils, laughed and poured wine into his own cup. "Like you wouldn't drink it anyway, you old bandit?" He sobered. "What brings you down from the mountains, Cho? The rumors about Celestinvael?" The ancient city lay in the forested no-man's-land between Ardivent and the Delarquan Federation, and woodsmen had been bringing tales of marvels and minor disasters for weeks now. That it was a matter for concern, a matter that would bear watching, was undeniable, but Fandil had seen nothing to indicate that it was urgent. "Celestinvael is enough to worry about," Master Cho answered, nodding, "and it is indirectly what brought me here. If you think about what the city was like in its last days...! But my immediate concern is young Adeolar up in Aruak City." "I may be retired," old Fandil said stiffly, "but I'm not COMPLETELY out of touch, Cho! Adeolar is a very competent woman, and Kennelworth is not worried about her--he'd have mentioned it in his last letter. She can handle anything she's likely to meet." "No doubt...one on one. But that fool Khaldren has invoked and involved wizards from a dozen centuries. Not all of them will work together--as well try to get cats to run in step! But some will, and can she handle two, or six, or ten, if they're all working together?" "Ah." Fandil was silent for several minutes, stroking his beard slowly as his mind raced. "Ah. That could be...bad. Very bad." He set his wine cup down carefully. "You're quite right. We'll have to assist her, or at least be ready to do so. Now?" "What better time?" * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===--- Duelmasters ----------- DM 8 ARKERS (turn 242): CLOSED MIND of BLACKTHORN ORCS (Slugbait, mgr.) DM 11 ARUAK CITY (turn 487): B.B. KING of THE BLUES (Keldon Blackfang, mgr.) DM 14 TOBIR (turn 487): HYDE of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.) DM 22 SOLVEN (turn 480): SKEEMER of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.) DM 24 ZORPUNT (turn 476): KID ROCK of THE MC5 (Street Legal, mgr.) DM 25 LYRATILAN (turn 476): XYLZ AREE of THE MIDDLE WAY 4 (Leeta, mgr.) DM 26 CALEAM (turn 477): SAPPER of SHERWOOD FOREST (Papaiz, mgr.) DM 30 IAYE (turn 472): CHERKO of RED DOG GANG (Leeta, mgr.) DM 40 ZENSU (turn 438): SUSAN STO HELIT of THE DISC (Technogeek, mgr.) DM 41 KATI-TEI (turn 431): TORA HAMLIN of WANDERERS (Leeta, mgr.) DM 46 ARDIVENT (turn 424): DODGER of HARDTIMESINBABYLON (Technogeek, mgr.) DM 52 FRATSFA (turn 190): GRIM GLADIOLA of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.) DM 60 ARADI (turn 335): GUMMI GHOUL of THE UPSTARTS III (Anti, mgr.) DM 63 AMEN-TEI (turn 325): FREAN of SAFE HAVEN (Keldon Blackfang, mgr.) DM 71 KYR'TERR (turn 145): TOMB of SHADOW GOLD (Shadowgate, mgr.) ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 372): MONICA VIRTUESHIELD of KNIGHTS OF VIRTUE from ARUAK CITY (JRK, mgr.) Top Teams --------- DM 8 ARKERS (turn 242): LA PENTARCHIE (The Pentalque, mgr.) DM 11 ARUAK CITY (turn 487): BULLDOGS (Kennelworth, mgr.) DM 14 TOBIR (turn 487): ALL THE MUN'S MEN (The Mun, mgr.) DM 22 SOLVEN (turn 480): none DM 24 ZORPUNT (turn 476): WATER DECK (Destitute Noble, mgr.) DM 25 LYRATILAN (turn 476): CHAUCERS WORDS (Berylstar, mgr.) DM 26 CALEAM (turn 477): WARCKERS (Papaiz, mgr.) DM 30 IAYE (turn 472): RED DOG GANG (Leeta, mgr.) DM 40 ZENSU (turn 438): WIMPS MOST FOWL (Wimpy, mgr.) DM 41 KATI-TEI (turn 431): MEMPHIS MAFIA (Bookie, mgr.) DM 46 ARDIVENT (turn 424): HARDTIMESINBABYLON (Technogeek, mgr.) DM 52 FRATSFA (turn 190): OHIO (Berylstar, mgr.) DM 60 ARADI (turn 335): LOCK-OUT (Elephant, mgr.) DM 63 AMEN-TEI (turn 325): WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.) DM 71 KYR'TERR (turn 145): CASTLE BLACK (Shadowgate, mgr.) ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 372): SUNNYDALE, etc. (LHI, mgr.) Recent Graduates ---------------- DM 8 ARKERS (turn 242): CLOSED MIND of BLACKTHORN ORCS (Slugbait, mgr.) (turn 241): MELTDOWN of X-FORCE (Savant, mgr.) DM 11 ARUAK CITY (turn 485): CONNOR MACLEOD of SCARLET KNIGHTS II (Talon Warsmith) DM 14 TOBIR (turn 487): HYDE of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.) (turn 486): BLACK HEART SEEKER of CEASE TO EXIST (Sceptre, mgr.) 10% VIGORISH of THE DEATH SQUAD (Street Legal, mgr.) DM 22 SOLVEN (turn 480): MAXIMUS of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.) DM 24 ZORPUNT (turn 476): KID ROCK of THE MC5 (Street Legal, mgr.) DM 25 LYRATILAN (turn 476): XYLZ AREE of THE MIDDLE WAY 4 (Leeta, mgr.) (turn 475): LANCE of POWER AND FATE (Sceptre, mgr.) DM 26 CALEAM (turn 477): SAPPER of SHERWOOD FOREST (Papaiz, mgr.) OMNIBOOK 500 of AT WORK (The Muffin Man, mgr.) DM 30 IAYE (turn 472): CHERKO of RED DOG GANG (Leeta, mgr.) BLOODY MOUTH of BLOOD OATH (Ganolus Oakleaf, mgr.) (turn 471): DUMB, DUMB of RED DOG GANG (Leeta, mgr.) HELL'S WHISPER of PERFECT HARMONY (Sceptre, mgr.) DM 40 ZENSU (turn 437): CMOT DIBBLER of THE DISC (Technogeek, mgr.) JOPHAN of BEYOND THE PALE (Leeta, mgr.) DM 46 ARDIVENT (turn 424): DODGER of HARDTIMESINBABYLON (Technogeek, mgr.) (turn 423): PURPLE SASH of HARDTIMESINBABYLON (Technogeek, mgr.) DM 60 ARADI (turn 335): WINKER X of 4000 BLOWS (Nuln, mgr.) (turn 334): LIGHTNING IX of DEATH STUDS VII (Death Stud, mgr.) DM 71 KYR'TERR (turn 144): LOKI of ARCTIC GUARDS (Yukon Cornelius, mgr.) DUELMASTER'S COLUMN Notes from the arena champ. Hail, Solven! It is I, Skeemer, your humble Duelmaster upon the throne for yet another turn. Kangaroo Kate put up a valiant effort, but it was not quite enough. Perhaps she will get up into the challenger champs before I graduate and have one more shot at the title. Speaking of shots at the title, this week's challenge goes out to Rumsfeld. Here is your shot at the throne, Judge, don't choke on it. If you are avoiding, that means I most likely get matched up with a lunger or parry lunger, and we all know that would be the end of my run on top of Solven. Welp kiddies, looks like there is only one or two more turns up here for me, and then it's off to ADM with my brothers Homeless Prince and Maximus. For any of you who enjoy the back and forth fighting of this arena, I urge you to follow our path to ADM Arena 105, Andorak. I am sure that in no time at all that we could have 105 up to par with 22 as far as the great time that is had in this fine arena. Think about it, ADM does not have to be the vast wasteland it once was. Best of luck in this week's duels, warriors of Solven. I'm off to practice and work on picking up that 4th Master rating. Until next week.... -- Skeemer SPY REPORT Busy, busy, busy, lots of things happening in SOLVEN this turn, and let's start with a look at some of the teams. Now keep the taverns open late tonight, for there are sorrows to drown for THE POISON CLAN, whose 1-4-0 this turn dropped them by 4 into 6th. SAVAGE HEARTS 2 stable has parlayed this turn's 4-1-0 into a 3 space move up the rankings. This brings them up to 3rd place. Good work, guys! The BIBLE BELTERS guild has had a 4-1-0 turn and deserves to be watched in the future. You never know where this kind of thing can lead. On their very first turn, K FORCE had a 4-1-1, and with this kind of luck or skill, should do well. Welcome to SOLVEN. And let's see, EASY BREEZE fought RUFUS and gained 25 points and contributed to JUST CHILLIN's 3-2-1. RUFUS has lost to EASY BREEZE, falling 20 points, while helping make BIBLE BELTERS a 4-1-0 turn. The attempts to dethrone the Duelmaster have failed, and SKEEMER remains SOLVEN's top warrior for another turn. By the way, was that our Duelmaster that I saw last night, cramped under the table at The Victory Tavern? I tell you, a green quarterstaff lasts longer than a seasoned sapling. A basher friend of mine assures me this is true. I also notice that the THE DEMOCRATS stable was the most avoided team this turn. Come on SOLVEN, what are you afraid of? And guess who avoided THE DEMOCRATS stable the most? Believe it or not, it was THE POISON CLAN. Anyone surprised? The most challenged warrior this turn was THE POISON CLAN's warrior THE LIZARD. More fighters challenged him than challenged the Duelmaster! Building dreams on hope, FLAT TAX challenged up 28 points this turn to take on KANGAROO KATE from THE ZOO stable. And now nobody knows where KANGAROO KATE is right now, after giving FLAT TAX 20 points worth of recognition. As quiet chuckles rise behind me. In a brave attempt, HANNAH from BIBLE BELTERS challenged up 22 points to fight THE LIZARD from the THE POISON CLAN stable. HANNAH perhaps got hers just desserts, seeing as she bested THE LIZARD and ended up with 41 recognition points. We only live a short time in this world, so why not take a sharp blade, and shave it close? Whatever bright future PING' LEE may have had, it's all history now. The manager of CHINESE CONNECTION has lost a promising 4-2-0 warrior. Kudos go out to RUMSFELD this turn, for revenging THE REPUBLICANS' bloodfeud against CONSPIRACY INC.'s warrior GEORGE BUSH. Well done. Is it really true that SOLVEN has more dishwashers per capita that fighters? Just thought I'd ask... I like this place, SOLVEN, the taverns have old wine, and young serving girls. Who could ask for more? Well, I'm burning daylight here in SOLVEN and I've a long road ahead of me. Happy Trails. Until you see my quill in SOLVEN again, farewell-- Alarond the Scribe DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME SKEEMER 5965 21 13 0 117 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME RUMSFELD 6032 13 14 0 115 THE REPUBLICANS (103) BLIND GIRL 6041 20 5 0 109 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) ILSA SHE-WOLF 6107 12 3 1 106 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) TURKEY JOE 5825 20 39 0 99 THE ZOO (205) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME KANGAROO KATE 5900 18 34 1 89 THE ZOO (205) GEORGE BUSH 1708 17 9 1 89 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) FLAT TAX 5998 14 19 0 82 THE REPUBLICANS (103) NANCY PELOSI 6076 12 7 1 76 THE DEMOCRATS (202) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME THE TOAD 6121 11 0 0 64 THE POISON CLAN (692) EASY BREEZE 6173 6 3 1 62 JUST CHILLIN (699) TERMINATOR 6158 5 5 0 62 SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) DARRELL ISSA 6108 10 5 2 59 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) WHAT UP 6172 8 1 1 58 JUST CHILLIN (699) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME MAYBE LATER 6176 6 3 1 57 JUST CHILLIN (699) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME ANTHONY SCALIA 6103 11 5 0 46 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) CHUNG' FOW 6184 5 3 0 45 CHINESE CONNECTION (700) GIDEON 3308 7 7 0 42 BIBLE BELTERS (364) HANNAH 6144 6 5 0 41 BIBLE BELTERS (364) RUFUS 6180 7 2 0 38 BIBLE BELTERS (364) THE SCORPION 6117 8 3 0 37 THE POISON CLAN (692) KALAMAZOO 6116 6 7 0 34 THE ZOO (205) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME SNAKE CHARMER 6169 8 3 0 33 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) NO HURRY 6174 5 4 0 33 JUST CHILLIN (699) SAVAGE DRAGON 6155 4 6 1 33 SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) LIA' KIAN 6185 3 5 0 33 CHINESE CONNECTION (700) SAMURIA SAM 6200 4 3 0 32 SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) THE LIZARD 6120 6 5 1 31 THE POISON CLAN (692) JEHORAM 6209 2 4 1 30 BIBLE BELTERS (364) ANN COULTER 6168 6 5 0 27 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) JOSIAH 6201 4 2 0 26 BIBLE BELTERS (364) ROE V WADE 6226 3 1 0 25 THE DEMOCRATS (202) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME CHENEY 6153 6 5 0 23 THE REPUBLICANS (103) ZOOIE 6152 4 8 0 22 THE ZOO (205) THE LOTUS 6208 4 2 0 20 THE POISON CLAN (692) CAROL M. BRAUN 6146 4 8 0 20 THE DEMOCRATS (202) CHARLES RANGEL 6229 2 1 1 20 THE DEMOCRATS (202) 2ND AMENDMENT 6211 1 4 0 15 THE REPUBLICANS (103) AL FRANKEN 6253 2 0 0 14 THE DEMOCRATS (202) ATILLA 6228 2 1 0 14 SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) THE PHOENIX 6227 1 3 0 14 THE POISON CLAN (692) BRUJAH 6237 1 0 0 12 WHITE WOLF (707) IRON MONKEY 6186 2 5 0 11 CHINESE CONNECTION (700) ARISHTARTE 6257 1 0 1 11 THE ZOO (205) JER BER 6235 1 0 1 11 K FORCE (706) LING' LON 6187 1 7 0 10 CHINESE CONNECTION (700) ARLS 6233 1 0 0 10 K FORCE (706) TRADER JACK 6189 1 0 0 10 DROP THE LEASH (701) SHADE 6232 1 0 0 9 K FORCE (706) GIL STAYNE 6234 1 0 0 7 K FORCE (706) GREMMIE 6192 0 1 0 7 DROP THE LEASH (701) WHO ME 6246 1 0 0 6 WHY (708) BOSCOE 6231 0 1 0 5 K FORCE (706) ALIEN 6218 0 5 0 5 SAVAGE HEARTS 2 (697) LASOMBRA 6240 0 1 0 1 WHITE WOLF (707) GANGREL 6238 0 1 0 1 WHITE WOLF (707) ASSAMITE 6239 0 1 0 1 WHITE WOLF (707) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? PING' LEE 6188 4 3 0 CHINESE CONNECTIO 700 WHAT UP 6172 481 VINCE FOSTER 6254 0 1 0 CONSPIRACY INC. 100 MOUNTAIN TROLL 401 481 NONE WESLEY CLARK 6210 0 2 0 CONSPIRACY INC. 100 JEHORAM 6209 477 REVENGED DAYLIGHT COME 6193 0 1 0 DROP THE LEASH 701 SPYMASTER 405 481 NONE GUIDO 6190 0 1 0 DROP THE LEASH 701 WURM KIN 410 481 NONE NO!!! 6191 0 1 0 DROP THE LEASH 701 BLACK ORC 403 481 NONE ICE COLD 6175 3 6 0 JUST CHILLIN 699 SPYMASTER 405 481 NONE THREE STRIKES 6255 0 1 0 THE REPUBLICANS 103 CHARLES RANGEL 6229 481 SCHWARZENEGGER 6050 12 11 1 THE REPUBLICANS 103 GEORGE BUSH 1708 480 JUST REV RAVNOS 6236 0 1 0 WHITE WOLF 707 JER BER 6235 481 THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? COULD BE 6245 0 1 0 WHY 708 ARISHTARTE 6257 481 GIREFFY 6102 4 11 0 THE ZOO 205 MAYBE LATER 6176 480 PERSONAL ADS Skeemer -- Such couth, such courtesy. -- Kangaroo Kate Rumsfield -- I think it's your damned wig. -- Turkey Joe Ann Coulter -- With whom do you conspire, and why? -- Gireffy Maybe Later -- Maybe not. -- Kalamazoo What Up -- I hate it when that happens. -- Zooie P.S. Because it HURTS. Wong Fei Hung -- But it wasn't your culture in the arena with me. -- Zooie Bear Market -- Keep missing me. It hurts less. -- Turkey Joe Kellumbo -- Read the Aradi Spotlights for turn 336. You will find "The Goose Is Loose, Still" interesting. -- Wimpy Silver -- Me get violated? And what may I ask has you in such a dark mood? Been sipping the pig's blood again? I see you've joined the boys of CHAOS. Did they make you the honorary gopher manager. Fetch any coffee and donuts lately? Perhaps you coul Salvaged Dragon -- Listen up pup, you're 16 ounces too cocky for your own good. Keep it up and you find yourself in the underworld. -- Woelfe Silver -- I gotta admit, I was feeling a little unloved there for a while...nice to see you back in your typical tenebrous-self. <chuckles> Must have something to do with winning a few fights. -- Woelfe Savage Dragon -- Who would have thought Rufus would end up rematching you in the tourney. Rufus was on quite the tear until you once again used his head as a human pin-cushion. It was difficult for Rufus to think straight, much less gladiate after such an encounter. -- Rufus, still The Great One Chung-Fow -- Rufus has taken you down...all the way to Chinatown. Whilst there, Rufus would like some pork lo mein and some crab rangoon. And don't forget Rufus' fortune cookie. -- Rufus the Great The Phoenix -- I must say, I've never considered a helm an adequate substitute for a parrying weapon, and after seeing you employ it as such, I'll never try it myself. Repeat after me -- Brains are for thinking, not for parrying large heavy swords. -- Josiah The Lizard -- I think we have danced this dance before, have we not? Don't make me sic my sister on you. <grin> -- Gideon Josiah -- Consider yourself lucky that I stayed out late the night before the fight drinking and debauching with your sister. Otherwise the outcome would have been very different. -- The Phoenix Ping' Lee -- I see the dumplings are working for you. I have lodged a complaint with the commission and asked them to check your urine for drugs. I'm certain that this is the only way I could have lost the fight. -- The Lotus Master Taco -- Hey, check it out: All I need is another 5-0 turn and I take back the best 3 turn record...no sweat! -- Kellumbo Kangaroo Kate -- I must admit, neither fight went as I had expected, but I'll take the results! Turkey Joe -- Thanks for letting a young pup wolf get one in before you head off into the sunset and retire. -- Ilsa She-Wolf Rumsfeld -- Boy, you sure have some nerve making me desperate and all that! -- Blind Girl P.S. You had to see that coming, didn't you? Judge -- Kellumbo's Kids and myself would like to take a minute and send out our sincere condolences on the death of Schwarzenegger. Losing a champion level warrior such as him really sucks. Best wishes on getting back a replacement that numbs the sting some. -- Detective Kellumbo Fellow Solvenites -- Thank you for a great year and a half. The memories that have been forged will last a lifetime. I will never forget where I came from, nor who helped to make me who I am today. Stay strong, and always for Solven! -- Maximus Lia Kian -- Guess you can't avoid random match ups, eh? -- Snake Charmer The Toad -- You still need two more wins to tie my record for best start in Solven at 12-0.... Better be filling out that wish to avoid section for the next couple of turns. -- Maximus Silver Stroker -- You will hardly ever hear me complain about down challenges. I figure if I am going to do it, I should not complain about it. Hopefully you will be gunning for me because my new guys will be needing to pick up wins and skills, which your old losers should have ample supply of ready for them. -- Detective Kellumbo Al Gore -- You are right, that was a fun rematch. I send all of my guys to 105. It's too bad we couldn't convince the managers of this great arena to do the same so that some of the rivalries can be continued into ADM. -- Kellumbo Woelfe -- Ah...just like a good doggie; sit there and be quiet or you're going to get a foot in the bum. -- Silver Stroke Silver Stroke -- My apologies for the non-appearance of your spotlight (I'm assuming it was yours, at any rate). I didn't have time to edit it properly for this turn, but it will definitely appear next turn. -- Ed. P.S. If you want, you can send copies to Livia at reality.com and/or Sue at solberg-mathews.com (just replace the at with @, of course) as well as to the regular ads address. That gives either the Scribe or me the chance to edit in advance. Telldumbo -- Well, I did get the book from Judge. But it has your face on the cover and author was Judge. He told me if I put it in on the walls it will keep rodents and insects from creeping into my tavern and he was right. Unfortunately, it did cause my customers to go into vomit attacks while they are eating so I had to take it down during business hours. (wicked grin) -- Silver Stroke DK -- You still think you're a woman? Just because you wear dresses and hang out at 5th doesn't make you a woman, lol. Does Klinger mean anything to you? Didn't want to be the one who told you this, but you are MAN--but wear the dress if you like it, heheh. -- Silver Stroke P.S. When in doubt reach down and squeeze. ;) Mr. Taco -- You're not a very good liar, are you? When I fight a TP and minute 2 a get the death intent statement and then every other fight in the bloodfeud makes me doubt the truth of your statement. Don't get me wrong, I would have tried to kill in the same situation myself and I respect you for at least trying to, but don't lie to everyone trying to make it sound good, lol. -- Silver Stroke P.S. But I would have got the job done right. :) Got to love experience. You'll get it in time. Scorpion -- Lol. Thanks for your gracious mercy. Let's see how many more I can kill from your team. -- Savage Dragon P.S. Take note: the best enemy is a dead enemy. Ann Coulter -- Nice fight. My momma told me plates were for eating off of not wearing; guess she was right. ;) -- Savage Dragon Anthony -- I said put down the weapon. I meant put it down. -- Terminator Ice Cold -- Fitting name. -- Samauria Sam 2nd -- Haven't you heard of alien rights? I have rights, you know. -- Alien (calling the authorities) Al Frank -- Did you have to make your lawyer make me sign wavier papers? I had a bad feeling about that. -- Attlia Master Wong Fei Hung' -- Don't let the Woelfe bother you. After all, he drinks out of toilet, lol. -- Silver Stroke Woelfe -- Did I spray on your tavern? Or was it my complaining to the commission about the little droppings you leave behind? That wouldn't have been bad but when you started eating them, I drew the line. Ancient Chinese proverb 107, "Don't start anything you can't finish". -- Wong Fei Hung' Master Wong Fei Hung -- But the Woelfe is finishing what he started, heheh. -- Chung Fow Chung Fow -- I see you haven't learned your lesson, you militant whelp.... (proceeds to lay down the smack, old school style) -- Master Wong Fei Hung Lizard -- So you did eat my dumpling! -- Ping Lee Ping -- See, I told you couldn't trust a lizard. -- Chung Pow P.S. The Pow is not a typo; with as many beatings as the master gives me, I decided to change it to Pow. Chung Fow -- Come here, I'll show you pow! -- Wong Fei Hung' (readying a good frying pan) All -- (running though the streets wildly screaming as the master whacks him repeatedly) Sam -- Do not take the challenges with dismay. I was just being friendly. Want to do lunch? (wicked grin) -- Ling' Lon Rufus -- I get enough beatings; I don't need your help. -- Chung Pow Al Gore -- Keep an eye out, he is a swift. -- Chung Pow (looking around wildly) All -- I think I lost him. -- Chung Pow (rubbing his sore head profusely) Chung Pow -- No, he is behind you! -- Ping Lee' (points behind him) All -- (breaks out in a run then stops as he notices no one is there) I'll get you, Ping, if it is the last thing I do! (wipes the sweat from his head and picks up his toothpick) come here, Ping, I've got a surprise for you. (evil grin) -- Chung Pow All -- I told you I get you back, you fat pulcua! (running, hysterically laughing like a hyena) -- Ping' Lee The Lotus -- Black lotus only helps me fight better. (inhales) Ah...nothing like the smell of black lotus in the morning. -- Ping' Lee All -- I must train harder. -- Iron Monkey A lot of personals, including mine, didn't make it last time, but they should be here THIS time. -- Leeta Skeemer -- Those grapes were undoubtedly...um, I mean, I really didn't want to be duelmistress, with the responsibility of writing a column, etc. -- Kangaroo Kate Ilsa She-Wolf -- I've been meaning to ask, shouldn't you be a Narsh Utur Werewolf, rather than an Aruaki Werecat? -- Turkey Joe Maybe later -- Guess not. -- Ghost of Gireffy Carol M. Braun -- I hate you brauny women. -- Zooie Ling'Lon -- Yes, well, as long as Joe has brought up the topic of appropriate races, with a name like that, I'd expect you to be one of the Adantri races. Sendori, maybe, or Mirani. Just wondering. -- Kalamazoo Master Taco -- That's my cologne. -- Al Gore Just Chillin -- Downchallenging isn't something we Andorians approve of. Prepare for some payback. -- Al Gore Zooie -- Thank you for the easy win. -- C. M. Braun Jehoram -- Easy win, good skills. Can't ask for much more. -- Al Gore Flat Tax -- What can I say? You suck. -- Al Gore Atilla -- Nice fight. Could have gone your way. See you around. -- Al Gore Alien -- Looks like you are winning some. Hang in there! -- Al Gore 8 April 2004 CLICK (KLK) -- Remember, you asked for it. Chaos is coming.... 14 April 2004 CHAOS Inc. proudly announces our newest member, Silver Stroke. He becomes the seventh brother of Chaos. We shall indeed be better for his joining. LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS ICE COLD was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight. VINCE FOSTER was slaughtered by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena battle. DAYLIGHT COME was assassinated by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel. GUIDO was dealt death by WURM KIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena contest. NO!!! was slain by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight. RUMSFELD demolished GEORGE BUSH in a 1 minute mismatched Bloodfeud competition. ILSA SHE-WOLF vanquished TURKEY JOE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight. FLAT TAX beat KANGAROO KATE in a 2 minute gory master's Challenge brawl. NO HURRY was overcome by CHUNG' FOW in a action packed 1 minute Challenge melee. EASY BREEZE vanquished RUFUS in a action packed 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel. TERMINATOR vanquished THE SCORPION in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight. ANN COULTER was savagely defeated by KALAMAZOO in a popular 1 minute Challenge melee. HANNAH narrowly defeated THE LIZARD in a 6 minute bloody Challenge match. ROE V WADE was overcome by GIDEON in a 1 minute novice vs. veteran Challenge contest. SAMURIA SAM overpowered IRON MONKEY in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge conflict. PING' LEE was savagely slain by WHAT UP in a 4 minute gory Challenge duel. JOSIAH bested THE LOTUS in a 5 minute gruesome Challenge duel. JEHORAM overpowered CAROL M. BRAUN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl. LING' LON was bested by ATILLA in a 3 minute brutal Challenge fight. SKEEMER subdued NANCY PELOSI in a 2 minute veteran's Title bout. MAXIMUS beat VIRGINAL CONCUBINE in a crowd pleasing 3 minute bloody master's fight. BLIND GIRL overpowered KHALHUMS DWARF in a monotonous 5 minute uneven fight. THE TOAD outlasted ANTHONY SCALIA in a crowd boring 15 minute fray. DARRELL ISSA handily defeated AMBITIOUS GUARD in a 1 minute brutal one-sided contest. MAYBE LATER savagely defeated SNAKE CHARMER in a action packed 4 minute brutal fight. SAVAGE DRAGON overpowered 2ND AMENDMENT in a 2 minute one-sided duel. CHENEY was overpowered by LIA' KIAN in a 1 minute uneven match. ZOOIE savagely defeated THE PHOENIX in a 2 minute gruesome duel. AL FRANKEN beat GANGREL in a crowd pleasing 1 minute novice's fray. ALIEN was outwaited by SHADE in a slow 11 minute novice's bout. CHARLES RANGEL slaughtered THREE STRIKES in a 1 minute one-sided fray. BOSCOE was savagely defeated by WHO ME in a 2 minute gory novice's match. ARLS overpowered GREMMIE in a 1 minute one-sided bout. GIL STAYNE overcame LASOMBRA in a action packed 1 minute amateur's match. JER BER assassinated RAVNOS in a 1 minute one-sided struggle. TRADER JACK demolished ASSAMITE in a 1 minute one-sided struggle. COULD BE was easily killed by ARISHTARTE in a 1 minute one-sided fight. BRUJAH demolished FRIENDLY CONSTABLE in a 4 minute one-sided conflict. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |STRIKING ATTACK 15 TOTAL PARRY 49 - 32 - 0 60 | |LUNGING ATTACK 12 STRIKING ATTACK 55 - 37 - 5 60 | |TOTAL PARRY 10 WALL OF STEEL 30 - 22 - 1 58 | |BASHING ATTACK 8 SLASHING ATTACK 20 - 17 - 1 54 | |SLASHING ATTACK 5 BASHING ATTACK 26 - 28 - 1 48 | |WALL OF STEEL 5 PARRY-STRIKE 14 - 18 - 0 44 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 5 PARRY-LUNGE 15 - 22 - 1 41 | |PARRY-LUNGE 3 LUNGING ATTACK 36 - 54 - 2 40 | |PARRY-STRIKE 2 PARRY-RIPOSTE 18 - 29 - 1 38 | |AIMED BLOW 2 AIMED BLOW 3 - 10 - 1 23 | Turn 481 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: PARRY-STRIKE 2 - 0 STRIKING ATTACK 6 - 9 2 TOTAL PARRY BASHING ATTACK 5 - 3 PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 4 2 LUNGING ATTACK SLASHING ATTACK 3 - 2 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 3 1 WALL OF STEEL TOTAL PARRY 6 - 4 1 PARRY-STRIKE WALL OF STEEL 3 - 2 1 STRIKING ATTACK AIMED BLOW 1 - 1 1 SLASHING ATTACK LUNGING ATTACK 6 - 6 1 AIMED BLOW 1 PARRY-LUNGE 1 BASHING ATTACK TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME WALL OF STEEL SKEEMER 5965 21 13 0 117 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) TOTAL PARRY BLIND GIRL 6041 20 5 0 109 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) STRIKING ATTACK ILSA SHE-WOLF 6107 12 3 1 106 KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) PARRY-LUNGE GEORGE BUSH 1708 17 9 1 89 CONSPIRACY INC. (100) LUNGING ATTACK NANCY PELOSI 6076 12 7 1 76 THE DEMOCRATS (202) BASHING ATTACK EASY BREEZE 6173 6 3 1 62 JUST CHILLIN (699) FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME SLASHING ATTACK MAYBE LATER 6176 6 3 1 57 JUST CHILLIN (699) PARRY-STRIKE HANNAH 6144 6 5 0 41 BIBLE BELTERS (364) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is RUMSFELD 6032. The most popular warrior this turn was MAYBE LATER 6176. The ten other most popular fighters were FLAT TAX 5998, WHAT UP 6172, NANCY PELOSI 6076, SAVAGE DRAGON 6155, AL FRANKEN 6253, WHO ME 6246, LING' LON 6187, SKEEMER 5965, ZOOIE 6152, and CHUNG' FOW 6184. The least popular fighter this week was THE TOAD 6121. The other ten least popular fighters were ANTHONY SCALIA 6103, ALIEN 6218, SHADE 6232, BLIND GIRL 6041, BRUJAH 6237, COULD BE 6245, ASSAMITE 6239, RAVNOS 6236, GREMMIE 6192, and BOSCOE 6231. The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn: SKEEMER (22-5965) KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) BLIND GIRL (22-6041) KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676) TURKEY JOE (22-5825) THE ZOO (205) The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn: MAXIMUS (22-5966) KELLUMBO'S KIDS (676)