Date   : 11/13/2006    Duedate: 11/25/2006


DM-26    TURN-541

This Weeks Top Honors


(26-4642) [12-4-0,97]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

PHILANTHROPISTS (467)          
(26-4642) [12-4-0,97]          

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

GOLDERIE                       GOLDERIE
GOLDEN CANYON (290)            GOLDEN CANYON (290)
(26-4657) [10-8-1,55]          (26-4657) [10-8-1,55]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. PHILANTHROPISTS (467)       10
2. GOLDEN CANYON (290)          6      PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
                                       Unchartered Team

                                       THE RED REAVERS (265)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 PHILANTHROPISTS (467)     33  23  0 58.9   1/ 1 GOLDEN CANYON (290)      12  3 0
 2/ 2 GOLDEN CANYON (290)      513 692 20 42.6   2/ 2 PHILANTHROPISTS (467)     4  5 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                      SPY REPORT

     Thankyouthankyou.  It's great for me, The Unknown Spymaster to be back in 
CALEAM.  Hope you enjoy the show.  Oh, who am I kidding?  I already got paid!  Hey 
everybody, watch out for MAUREEN, who flew up 7 points in the rankings after mashing 
IRON FORGE like a melon.  Keep your eye on this gal.  And falling like a basher in 
the top ten was CLEMMIE, who dropped 13 points after a disappointing (to say the 
least) bout with RUTHLESS JAYWALKER.  Our battling duelmaster ENLIGHTENED BEING has 
managed to hold the title, fending off VIRGINAL CONCUBINE's none too subtle advances. 
Better luck next time, CALEAM.  An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but an onion a 
day keeps T.P.s at bay.   
     But enough of that bunch, let's get on to the wimps who like to avoid battle!   
     Being a spy is great--other people die and you spend the rest of the day 
drinking to their memory.  Better tanked than dead!  Remember:  alliances are great, 
but try and take your ally in the arena with you and see what happens.   
     Well, there's the manager of the CALEAM giving me the 'cut' sign (or is that 
'They're going to strangle you in the alley?).  Okay, so I may not be the world's 
best comedian, but then you guys aren't the world's best warriors.  And remember, you 
can pick your friends and you can pick your--(loud boos), oh, you've heard that one 
already!-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ENLIGHTENED BEING 4642       12   4  0    97       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LORIS KEY 4706                7   0  1    64       GOLDEN CANYON (290)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GOLDERIE 4657                10   8  1    55       GOLDEN CANYON (290)
 CLEMMIE 4630                 11  14  1    48       GOLDEN CANYON (290)
 MAUREEN 4702                  6   3  0    34       GOLDEN CANYON (290)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-PLEXIGLASSJAWJOE 4650         6   3  0    33       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
-ORTH 4643                     6   3  0    27       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
-SMAYNURN 4656                 6   3  0    25       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PIKE 4708                     3   3  0    21       GOLDEN CANYON (290)
 IRON FORGE 4707               2   4  0    16       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?

                                     PERSONAL ADS

The Kung-Fu Master.  What a...thrill it was to be matched against him.  How
unutterably nasty he was, ungentlemanly, violent, even brutal, and so stingy with the
skills.  I can hardly contain my joy anent that match. -- Clemmie the marginally

     My sarcasm sense is tingling. -- Ed.

Ah, and the (oh, HA!) "Honest" Merchant.  You KNOW nobody has the cognomen "honest"
if he really IS honest.  It's all a vicious and underhanded trick. -- Golderie

I wouldn't want to appear to slavishly echo the statements of my teammate Clemmie, a
bit of a peasant, Golderie is, but in this, she is right.  The Honest Merchant is not
somebody any honest gladiator wants to know.  And, as Clemmie said, stingy with the
skills. -- Loris Key

Iron Forge -- I salute you for being a real opponent, even though you're too short
for most kinds of dating.  In fact, now that I look closely, why aren't you a dwarf?
You'd make a great dwarf, and then I could ask you to help me upgrade my armor and
you'd have a clue what to do.  Think about getting a race change! -- Maureen

That beggar was NOT polite.  He made snide remarks, had bad breath, and hit me up for
a "loan" on his way to the Infirmary.  What are beggars coming to these days?  He was
a disgrace to all beggars in the city. -- Pike
P.S.  Of course, having a substantial body of beggars in the city is a disgrace to
all the hardworking Caleamites in the city, so who cares about disgracing the

Well, it seems that we didn't get a chance for Cooking with Smaynurn this cycle.
Unfortunate, because I believe Clemmie had some ideas involving pasta and persimmons.
I guess we'll just have to wonder. -- Pike
P.S.  No, really, she says if Smaynurn isn't going to be active, she isn't going to
cook in public.  Or even in the privacy of our guildhouse, so even WE don't know what
she had in mind.

20 October 2006
In accordance with those rules set forth by the Lady of the Realm, I hereby announce
the formation of a small group of managers calling themselves "The Outsiders".  The
group consists of the following members:
     Doc LeGrande
     Street Legal
     This group has only one rule.  Respect the play of the managers of this
alliance.  We have no worries about not playing by the rules set forth by others.  We
fight the way we like, and all those in this group appreciate what tools each manager
brings.  We have managers from the Delarquan, Andorian and Free Blade regions.  We
have managers that focus on the tournament arenas, and we have those that focus on
the regular city arenas.  We have those in our ranks that fight with honor and
respect for all, and we have those that have a bloodlust that cannot be quenched.
     Our goal is simple.  To create a ensemble of managers that will show their
prowess in the land of Alastari, and to bring a new level of competition to all those
that share the sands with our warriors.  Our warriors are many throughout the land.
We have no home arena.  We have no pacts we abide by.  Our fighters range from
Mordant to Talcama, from Lapur to Lyratilan, Aruak City to Valamantis, the Primus
arena to Talahya, and many more arenas throughout the land.
     Whether we are sought out or ignored makes no difference to us.  We are what we
are.  We fight how we fight.  And we do it however we wish.  We have no rules.  We
have no leader or ruler.  Be prepared.  We are.

20 October 2006
The Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire respond thus to the Avengers of the Light:
Where are you?  EACH AND EVERY Dark Knight can be found in arenas 31 and 52.  Your
pretty words mean less than nothing if you won't fight.  EVERY Dark Knight is more
than willing to back up their talk.  So...we give you three turns in either 31 or 52,
REPEAT 31 or 52 to show up or shut up.  If you don't show we'll let all of Alastari
know the Avengers are indeed cowards! -- Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire

2 November 2006
I received a Gift Certificate from someone.  I'm assuming it's for entry into the
Turf War 5.  Whoever sent this to me...please email me at rbaphomets@yahoo.com.

10 November 2006
     The Quest of the Best has come to an end.  Dark Knight Toker, host of the Quest,
wants to proclaim the Ultimate Victor and give a listing of prize winners.
     Lady Fern and her Flower Girls of the Consortium are the Ultimate Victors of the
Quest.  Well fought and there's nothing like coming from behind to leave us all in
the dust.  Can't wait to see you defend your title! (wink)
     Here is a complete list of managers who placed in prize positions:

1)  Lady Fern, mgr. Flower Girls
2)  Le Pentarque, mgr. Blood & Guts!
3)  Crip, mgr. Otto's Parts
4)  D.K. Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Odin's Chosen
5)  Ghab, mgr. Assassin Nation
6)  Fanthayne, mgr. Dark Raiders
7)  D.K. Toker, mgr. Silver Knights
8)  D.K. Wasby, mgr. Bronze Knights
9)  The Expatriate, mgr. Bleak Legion
10) Still the Distilled, mgr. Springborne Fair

     Thanks to all that had the gall to show up, but I really want to thank the
managers that had the mettle to survive and not run when they started getting their
butt handed to them.
                                                           Respect to All.
                                                           Quest #1 host,
                                                           Dark Knight Toker

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

ENLIGHTENED BEING devastated VIRGINAL CONCUBINE in a 1 minute mismatched Title fight.
LORIS KEY vanquished VISITING ORC in a 1 minute uneven battle.
CLEMMIE was demolished by RUTHLESS JAYWALKER in a 1 minute uneven fight.
GOLDERIE viciously subdued THE HONEST MERCHANT in a 3 minute gory contest.
MAUREEN overpowered IRON FORGE in a 2 minute mismatched match.
PIKE bested SHIFTYEYED VOLUNTEER in a 2 minute duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|PARRY-LUNGE                      3         AIMED BLOW        11 -   0 -  2     100  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         STRIKING ATTACK    9 -   1 -  1      90  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   1         LUNGING ATTACK    14 -   3 -  0      82  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         SLASHING ATTACK    8 -   4 -  0      67  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         PARRY-LUNGE       14 -  11 -  0      56  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         TOTAL PARRY       19 -  20 -  0      49  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         WALL OF STEEL      4 -   7 -  0      36  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  0         BASHING ATTACK     6 -  11 -  0      35  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 541 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         3  PARRY-LUNGE    
PARRY-LUNGE        3 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         3  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  0         1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                              STRIKING ATTACK    0 -  0         1  AIMED BLOW     
                              BASHING ATTACK     0 -  1         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                              TOTAL PARRY        0 -  0         1  WALL OF STEEL  
                              WALL OF STEEL      0 -  1     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       LORIS KEY 4706              7   0  1   64 GOLDEN CANYON (290)
PARRY-LUNGE      GOLDERIE 4657              10   8  1   55 GOLDEN CANYON (290)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is GOLDERIE 4657.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was GOLDERIE 4657.  The ten other most popular fighters were ENLIGHTENED BEING 4642, 
PIKE 4708, LORIS KEY 4706, MAUREEN 4702, CLEMMIE 4630, IRON FORGE 4707,  0,  0,  0, 
and  0.

The least popular fighter this week was IRON FORGE 4707.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were CLEMMIE 4630, MAUREEN 4702, LORIS KEY 4706, PIKE 4708, ENLIGHTENED 
BEING 4642, GOLDERIE 4657,  0,  0,  0, and  0.