Date   : 01/22/2007    Duedate: 02/03/2007


DM-26    TURN-546

This Weeks Top Honors


(26-4657) [13-10-1,100]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

PHILANTHROPISTS (467)          
(26-4642) [16-4-0,121]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

SVEN BLUETOOTH                 PIKE
STEEL CRUSADE (477)            GOLDEN CANYON (290)
(26-4729) [16-32-0,86]         (26-4708) [5-6-0,22]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. GOLDEN CANYON (290)         16
2. STEEL CRUSADE (477)         10      PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
3. PHILANTHROPISTS (467)        8      Unchartered Team
4. MEDAL OF HONOR VI (468)      0
5. DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)      0      THE IRON HORDE (205)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 2*DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)   11   4  0 73.3   1/ 1 GOLDEN CANYON (290)       9  6 0
 2/ 3 PHILANTHROPISTS (467)     39  25  0 60.9   2/ 3 STEEL CRUSADE (477)       7  8 0
 3- 4*MEDAL OF HONOR VI (468)    3   2  0 60.0   3- 2*DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)   4  1 0
 4/ 5 GOLDEN CANYON (290)      528 702 20 42.9   4- 6*MEDAL OF HONOR VI (468)   2  0 0
 5/ 6 STEEL CRUSADE (477)       99 136  6 42.1   5/ 5 PHILANTHROPISTS (467)     2  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Well, that was interesting.  One minute I'm conking sweet Loris on the noggin
and the next thing you know, they tell me I'm Duelmaster.  Go figure.  But that's how
it is in showbiz, I guess.  At least that's what old Calvata says, and he ought to
know.  He's been managing teams since way back when.
     At any rate, now that I'm here it gives me this chance to put a few things
right.  First off, about the name.  You might find this hard to believe, but Cap'n
Crunch isn't my real name.  That's just a stage name old Cassius Calvata thought up
because he didn't think my real name sounded "warriorish enough".  So, Golderie, all
that cereal humor, while it was well intended, I'm sure, was lost on me.  Actually,
my real name is Winstead Swizzle III.  And given your culinary bent, that no doubt
rings a bell, eh?  That's right, my grandfather was THE Winstead Swizzle, master chef
to the Andorian Kings.  Cooking is in my blood, so to speak.
     So naturally when Maureen inquired about the crystallized syrup, it certainly
piqued my curiosity.  I keep hearing hints about the great cook-off, and can't wait
to discover your own entry.  Figs are so difficult to work into any decent dish, but
I think you're on the right track with the venison.  If I may be so bold, I'd suggest
butterflying a hind quarter roast, preferably from a young doe, then filling it with
a stuffing of chopped figs, finely diced shallots, four or five cloves of roast
garlic, and half a cup of chopped pistachios, seasoned with a tiny bit of cinnamon
and allspice with just a bit more of ground cumin and coriander.  I'm sure you can
work out the proper measurements...that's where the art is anyway, isn't it.  Roll as
for a rolled roast, and top with a nice apple smoked bacon.
     But enough of that.  Time to prepare for the next challenge, eh?  Onward and
upward as they say....

     Cap'n Crunch

                                      SPY REPORT

     It's me, The Unknown Spymaster, back to give you this week's Spy Report.  Sit 
back in your seats and we'll have more fun than a barrel of Zontanis.  Hey everybody, 
watch out for CAYLON MCCANN, who flew up 23 points in the rankings after mashing 
LORIS KEY like a melon.  Keep your eye on this guy.  Ya know, some days it doesn't 
pay to walk out on the sands.  LORIS KEY was beat by CAYLON MCCANN and drops 18 
points.  It's a proud day for the GOLDEN CANYON stable, as their warrior, GOLDERIE, 
ascended the Duelmaster's throne.  An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but an onion 
a day keeps T.P.s at bay.   
     Let's dig a little deeper into what's happening in the CALEAM arena.  Here's a 
song for you:  Who's afraid of the big, bad MEDAL OF HONOR VI?   Big bad MEDAL OF 
HONOR VI.  Big bad MEDAL OF HONOR VI.  CALEAM's afraid of the big bad MEDAL OF HONOR 
VI.  Tra la la la la!  And you guys like to boo me?  Well, unsling your rasberries, 
cause STEEL CRUSADE beats feet every time MEDAL OF HONOR VI smiles at them.  Try 
farming, eh?  Well dang howdy, but if challenges were votes, LORIS KEY would be 
president.  Although it may be a contest she doesn't want to win.  In a touching 
display by a 'touched' warrior, SVEN BLUETOOTH went after ENLIGHTENED BEING, who was 
higher by 23 points.  Well, when the dust settled, SVEN BLUETOOTH was defeated by 
     Remember that an arena is not always a safe place to be, but it is one of the 
most interesting, though!  Remember:  alliances are great, but try and take your ally 
in the arena with you and see what happens.   
     Well, there's the manager of the CALEAM giving me the 'cut' sign (or is that 
'They're going to strangle you in the alley?).  Okay, so I may not be the world's 
best comedian, but then you guys aren't the world's best warriors.  Hasta la bye-bye. 
(Loud choruses of 'Beat it, ya bum!')-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GOLDERIE 4657                13  10  1   100       GOLDEN CANYON (290)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ENLIGHTENED BEING 4642       16   4  0   121       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SVEN BLUETOOTH 4729          16  32  0    86       STEEL CRUSADE (477)
 CLEMMIE 4630                 16  14  1    85       GOLDEN CANYON (290)
 CAYLON MCCANN 4728           12  17  1    80       STEEL CRUSADE (477)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CAP'N CRUNCH 4724            10   4  1    76       STEEL CRUSADE (477)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LORIS KEY 4706                9   3  1    54       GOLDEN CANYON (290)
-ARTHUR BEYER 4648             3   0  0    54       MEDAL OF HONOR VI (468)
 MAUREEN 4702                  9   5  0    37       GOLDEN CANYON (290)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-PLEXIGLASSJAWJOE 4650         6   5  0    31       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
-ORTH 4643                     7   3  0    30       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
-SCARLET SKINK 4713            3   0  0    27       DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)
-SMAYNURN 4656                 6   3  0    25       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
-IRON FORGE 4707               3   4  0    25       PHILANTHROPISTS (467)
-SPECKLED GECKO 4711           3   0  0    24       DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)
 UP-CHUCKY 4722                3   2  0    24       STEEL CRUSADE (477)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PIKE 4708                     5   6  0    22       GOLDEN CANYON (290)
-GUARDIAN NAGA 4712            2   1  0    18       DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)
-IVORY IGUANA 4714             2   1  0    17       DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)
 CALONYMUS 4721                1   2  0     5       STEEL CRUSADE (477)
-TIMBER RATTLESNAKE 4710       1   2  0     5       DOC LEGRAND'S LAB (475)
-SOLDIER 1 4649                0   1  0     1       MEDAL OF HONOR VI (468)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
SOLDIER 3 4645         0  1 0 MEDAL OF HONOR VI 468 PINK PANTHER 4733     543         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Clemmie, m'dear, I wouldn't put too much stock in that star business.  Sven says it's
just a scam used by old fakes looking to scrounge a few free drinks.  Anyway, I think
I ran into that same guy over at the "Twisted Lemming", and he gave me the same spiel
about the stars that he gave you, only he tried to tell me that it was YOU that was
doomed by the heavens.  Just goes to show you, huh? -- Caylon

Golderie -- I do hope you'll not hold my beating you against the Cap'n.  He can't
stop talking about the cook-off.  We all hope you'll invite him so he'll shut up
about it and give the rest of us a break. -- Sven

Caylon McCann -- You know, I could DO something with that.  I'm not sure yet whether
a "caylon" is a kind of melon or a tropical shellfish.  Or... yes!  It's a melon-
colored shellfish.  One must be SURE that the color is pure, because any darkening or
dulling would indicate that the shellfish wasn't FRESH, and one KNOWS how important
freshness is in such matters.  Maybe...lightly washed with one of Golderie's herbed
vinegars and then stir-fried?  That might do it.  I'll have to test this at once!  It
could be a key entry in the cook-off.  Do say you'll stop by and have a taste!
You've been such a help already. -- Clemmie

Calonymus -- Perfect!  If we're going to get into shellfish, as Clemmie seems to be
thinking of, your suggestion of REAL fish is just EXACTLY the right idea.  Sealed in
a sheath of metal foil with my secret seasonings, baked in a slow oven, not too
long--don't want it tough, the meat should just fall apart at the touch of a fork--
and it will be PERFECT. -- Pike
P.S.  But I must have shallots, and a morsel of lemon honey.

Cap'n Crunch -- I don't think a granola recipe will get me into the cook-off, but
thanks anyway.  It wasn't a bad suggestion, just...not the kind of thing my
teammates, or the judges, dammit, would consider "serious" cooking. -- Loris Key

Sven Bluetooth -- (recoiling in revulsion)  They can't expect ME to cook shellfish!
YOU can't expect it, surely?  I mean, very pretty shells and all, but....  Wait,
those SHELLS.  I could DO something with those shells.  Are there more where you got
these?  Hmm.  I suppose in the spirit of "waste not, want not" I should do SOMETHING
with the contents of the shells.  Maybe if I chopped them fine, sauteed them with
scallions and herbs, made them into a sauce, and served them over toast.... --
Golderie, deep in thought

Arthur Beyer -- I suppose that as a golem you can't be expected to enter into the
spirit of the cook-off, but seriously, what can I do with a name like that?  All it
suggests to me is crackers.  ...Crackers?  Maybe herbed crackers intended to be eaten
with a simple cheese spread as an appetizer, yes, maybe I could do something with
that.... -- Maureen

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

SVEN BLUETOOTH was devastated by ENLIGHTENED BEING in a 1 minute Challenge fight.
CAYLON MCCANN handily defeated LORIS KEY in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
CAP'N CRUNCH was vanquished by GOLDERIE in a 1 minute mismatched Title brawl.
CLEMMIE defeated M. CHARDINEE in a exciting 1 minute fight.
MAUREEN devastated FRATSFAN NOBLE in a 1 minute uneven brawl.
PIKE defeated CALONYMUS in a 2 minute veteran vs. amateur struggle.
UP-CHUCKY handily defeated POLITE BEGGAR in a 1 minute uneven fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|PARRY-LUNGE                      4         LUNGING ATTACK    18 -   3 -  0      86  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         SLASHING ATTACK    5 -   1 -  1      83  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         AIMED BLOW        11 -   3 -  0      79  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   1         PARRY-LUNGE       19 -  14 -  0      58  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         BASHING ATTACK    11 -   9 -  0      55  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         STRIKING ATTACK    6 -   5 -  0      55  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         TOTAL PARRY        7 -  11 -  0      39  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  0         PARRY-STRIKE       1 -   2 -  0      33  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      0         WALL OF STEEL      2 -   4 -  0      33  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 546 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     BASHING ATTACK     1 -  2         3  BASHING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  1         2  PARRY-LUNGE    
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  AIMED BLOW     
PARRY-LUNGE        3 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  0         2  TOTAL PARRY    
                              TOTAL PARRY        0 -  0         1  LUNGING ATTACK 
                              WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0         1  PARRY-STRIKE   

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-LUNGE      GOLDERIE 4657              13  10  1  100 GOLDEN CANYON (290)
BASHING ATTACK   CLEMMIE 4630               16  14  1   85 GOLDEN CANYON (290)
AIMED BLOW       LORIS KEY 4706              9   3  1   54 GOLDEN CANYON (290)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is SVEN BLUETOOTH 4729.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was PIKE 4708.  The ten other most popular fighters were ENLIGHTENED BEING 4642, 

The least popular fighter this week was CAP'N CRUNCH 4724.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were LORIS KEY 4706, SVEN BLUETOOTH 4729, MAUREEN 4702, UP-CHUCKY 
BEING 4642, and PIKE 4708.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn: