Date   : 12/06/2006    Duedate: 12/19/2006


DM-29    TURN-542

This Weeks Top Honors


(29-4427) [15-11-0,113]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

SOLAR FLARE                    TOMO-CHAN
VENUSIANS (321)                WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)
(29-4427) [15-11-0,113]        (29-2928) [3-0-0,33]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

SNOWSHOE                       DIRTY SANCHEZ
(29-4712) [15-12-0,57]         (29-4802) [1-2-0,5]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. CROC FILES (374)            45
2. THE VENOM DIVINE (419)      37      STREET WALKERS (97)
3. ESCAPADE (417)              30      Unchartered Team
4. MEN (356)                   29
5. WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)      24      THE VENOM DIVINE (419)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 STREET WALKERS (97)      376 249 31 60.2   1/ 1 FORCE OF NATURE (312)    11  4 1
 2/ 0*THE VENOM DIVINE (419)     3   2  2 60.0   2/ 3 STREET WALKERS (97)       8  7 1
 3/ 6*WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)     8   7  0 53.3   3/ 4 MEN (356)                 8  7 1
 4/ 3 BLACK SAMURAI (166)      308 290 20 51.5   4/ 7*WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)    8  7 0
 5/ 4 CROC FILES (374)         320 303 20 51.4   5/ 2 CARDOW HUNTERS (359)      7  8 1
 6/ 5 KNIGHTMARE (103)          63  61  1 50.8   6/ 9 CROC FILES (374)          6  9 0
 7/ 7 VENUSIANS (321)          150 158  9 48.7   7/ 8*ESCAPADE (417)            6  9 0
 8/ 8 FORCE OF NATURE (312)    190 207 13 47.9   8/ 6 KNIGHTMARE (103)          5  5 0
 9/10 MEN (356)                124 155  9 44.4   9/10 VENUSIANS (321)           5 10 1
10/ 9 CARDOW HUNTERS (359)     325 407  8 44.4  10/ 5 BLACK SAMURAI (166)       4  3 0
11/11*ESCAPADE (417)             6   9  0 40.0  11/ 0*THE VENOM DIVINE (419)    3  2 2
12/12*ARMY OF DARKNESS (283)     9  23  0 28.1  12/12*ARMY OF DARKNESS (283)    3  6 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

     We open at the Albino Dragon Tavern in the degraded slums of Lapur.  The air is
thick with the smell of fresh froth and urine.  The lodge teems with the usual day to
day occurrence of pathetic somber souls drowning themselves quietly in a frosty
     ????:  "WWAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!"
     ...except for one soul who vocals her displeasure with a little louder
reverberation than most.  The sobs echo throughout the establishment as their waves
bounce off the moss covered walls.  The other patrons muffle their discontented quips
and avert their gaze from the cries' source out of fear.  For doing so could result
in, shall we say 'accidental repercussions'.
     As we shift ever so closer to the shrieks of discontent, there standing next to
the bar is a stalky looking fellow.  With the 3 week old 3 o'clock stubble on his
chin, the sagging shape of fifty kilo bags under his eyes, and the morning star
hangover he must have by the particular grimace on his face.  The man leans over with
one hand firmly planted against the wall in front of him, like he was gripping it for
dear life.  Seemingly blocking the cries of sorrow that are plaguing everyone else,
he arches on his toes and lets out a sigh of relief.
     Unknown man:  "Haaaaaaaaaaaa...."
     ...as he relieves himself in the pissing trough next to the bar.  The man is
none other than Rewrite of Will Duel 4 Mead.  With a smile on his face that could
make children run, and visions of a bard in his head, he starts swaying side to side
while gently singing a little tale to tat.
     Rewrite:  "I once met a sweetie in Aruak City.  Who on this poor soul she took
pity.  She could clamp down like a vice.  She did a really niftum trick with some
mice.  And boy could she ever...."
     The sobs halt but for a moment as they are replaced with a thundering boom of
dissatisfaction that cuts our hero's song short....
     Rewrite squeaks a little yelp as he jumps at his critic's response.  As the
crying returns he quickly gives two or three shakes, yanks up his trousers, and wipes
his hands with the moist bar sponge next to him.  This incidentally is also used to
clean the bar's surface and drinking mugs to boot.  He moseys with his insolent
stride to a table and sits down to the source of the whimpering, a young girl with
her face planted face down on the table.
     Rewrite:  "Now, now, brown cow.  It ain't like itism the end of the world or
     The young woman lifts her head from the puddle of tears that has formed between
her arms.  With her cheeks flushed, faint strands of hair covering her face, and a
single strand of goo that stretches from her nose past her chin, which is quickly
snuffed back in.  Her usual brilliant luster of perfection personified beauty is
waning...Kyoko of Will Duel 4 Mead has seen better days.
     Rewrite:  "Theres'em my girl."
     With a quick wipe of the eyes, sad puppy dog look quickly fades from Kyoko's
face and is replaced with a burning fire of destruction that would make Arenamaster
Kryall crap in his armor.
     Rewrite:  "Ut-oh!"
     Rewrite flails in an effort to flee from the in depending doom that is about to
befall him, but only manages to tip over backwards in his stool.  Before his
shambling body can splat against the floorboards below, he is halted in midair by a
soft white skinned yet very intimidating fist grasping his shirt.  His gaze slowly
moves from the hand of his temporary savior, up the arm to its owner standing above
him.  The blood trickles out of Kyoko's lower lip as she bites down.  The left side
of her face twitches uncontrollably as if she has lost total control of it.  In an
effort to regain her compose, she heaves a deep breath.
     Kyoko:  "Who...are...you...calling...a....cow...YOU SON OF A B$@%*!!!"
     She bellows out a war cry like that of a valkyrie in the midst of battle, and
drives her fist downward towards her target.  Rewrite can only smirk in denial with a
look on his face like his life was flashing before his eyes.  The clash of the
unstoppable force and the immovable object commences as Kyoko's fist makes connect
with Rewrite's grimacing mug.  The crinkle and crack of bone shattering echoes
throughout the hall.  The impact sends our brigand crashing like a rag doll to the
wooden floor below.  A cloud of dust ascends from a bellowing hole where his skull
first made contact.
     Kyoko:  "And I am definitely not 'Your Girl'!"
     She spouts as a debilitating kick to the groin is delivered for good measure.
Rewrite curls up in the fetal position and contemplates his now defunct dreams for
any children in the future.
     Rewrite:  "AHHHH!!! YOU BROKEM DA NOSE!!!  YOU CRAZY B$...."
     He stops short as he realizes by the intense flame burning out of control in
Kyoko's eyes that if he finishes his sentence death on the sands would no longer be a
concern for him.
     Rewrite:  "Uhh...never minds...sorry Kyo..I mean Miss Manager."
     Kyoko:  "You're damned right you are!"
     Kyoko marches back to her stool, puts her elbows on the table and places her
chin in her hands.  Rewrite slowly but surely picks his mangy carcass off the floor
and joins her back in his spot and just kind of peers downward in possible shame or
remissness at his crotch wishing he had some ice, while stuffing some loose cloth up
his nose to stop the bleeding.  The two sit in silence for a minute or so in quiet
contemplation.  After a while Rewrite lifts his gaze upward and over to Kyoko who is
still pouting just a little less vocally.
     Rewrite:  ".....Look manager you can do the crying all you want."
     She tries to blow the strands of hair covering her face back over her head.
     Kyoko:  "Naa...I don't feel like it anymore.  What I could use now is a drink."
     She motions her hand in the air over to the bar.
     Kyoko:  "HEY!  BARKEEP!  Two Froth & Slosh Slurpies!  NOW!"
     Rewrite:  "You know you shouldn't beat'em yourself up about it.  It was just a
loss.  Hell I loss my firsts match and look how I bounced'em back this week."
     She turns and looks at Rewrite, who is still holding his crotch and whose nose
is bleeding and gives him the one two.
     Kyoko:  "...yeah...bags of sh*@ don't bounce, they just flop."
     Rewrite hangs his head in shame.
     Kyoko:  "Besides I don't lose!  I win, kill, and drink!  And on occasion wake up
in an unfamiliar bed.  BUT I DON'T LOSE!!"
     The waitress then puts down two bucket size mugs of mead on the table.  Kyoko
grabs one and immediately knocks half of it back in one gulp.  As Rewrite reaches for
the other mug, Kyoko spots him, grabs a thick wooden spoon at her side and breaks it
over his hand.
     Rewrite quickly yanks his hand away to count if his all of his fingers are still
there, as Kyoko slams her mug down on the table.
     She grabs the other frosty mug gulps a load back as well then wipes the froth
away covering almost all of her face.
     Kyoko:  "You know what pisses me off the most though!?  The fact I had that
s.o.b. Red Tiger literally by the skin of his back!  Begging for his momma and then
AHHH DAM IT!!!  I don't want to talk about it anymore!"
     Rewrite:  "Wells you have to give em some credit.  I mean he did beat Fluffy the
weeks earlier."
     Kyoko:  "He didn't beat Fluffy!  Fluffy passed the hell out halfway through,
because he was loaded going into the match!  Hell he's always loaded and everyone
knows he can't hold his spirits!"
     She knocks back the last of her frosty goodness and motions to again to the bar.
     She starts to fumble out of her seat, but Rewrite quickly motions her back into
     Rewrite:  "Calm downs, Calm downs.  You know the boss ain'ts going to be happy
if he has to bails you out jail agains."
     Kyoko:  "I don't give a diseased rat's hairy ass!  AARRHHHH...."
     She smacks her face down on the table in dismay.  Rewrite checks once again if
fingers are all still there, since he remember he can't count.  The waitress comes
over and places two more drinks on the table.  Kyoko still with her face down grasps
the handle of one.  Rewrite motions for the other again, but then stops and pulls his
hand back figuring he might lose a finger or thumb and be left with only with five
digits this time...again he can't count people.  Kyoko with her face still kissing
the table mumbles some words that are incomprehensible.
     Rewrite:  "Say whats?"
     Kyoko rolls her head to the side so she can be understood.
     Kyoko:  "I said..."
     Her words are cut short as the floor starts to rumble of giant footsteps.  Kyoko
lifts her head off the table and the two look at each other with a look of disgust.
     Kyoko & Rewrite in unison:  "Crap.  It's Goo."
     And with that an unsightly glob of half naked fat in a set of homemade set of
armor consisting of a loin cloth and a trash can lid, waddles over to the table and
just plops on the floor across from them.  With a bulbous pinky finger up its nose,
and drool streaming by the buckets out of the side of its mouth, it blurts out a cry.
     Goo:  "...heeeeeeeee....haaaaaaaaaa....teeeeeeee."
     Another bucket of drool escapes its mullet mouth.
     Rewrite:  "Hi Goo."
     The pile of lard pulls its finger out of its nose and offers 'the trophy' prize
on its end to Kyoko.
     Kyoko:  "Uh...no thanks Goo.  You keep it."
     A look of simple puzzlement falls over the creature's eyes for a moment, then
turns to delight and proceeds to lick its finger clean.
     Goo:  "...mmmmmmmm...tasty...."
     Kyoko and Rewrite both cringe at the horror they just witnessed.  Goo unfazed by
its on lookers goes about its business and moves the said finger now in its ear and
borrows around for desert.
     Kyoko:  "Ewww...I may be drunk by now, but not drunk enough for that.  BARKEEP
     Rewrite:  "Make itis three.  That's even grosses me oust, and I've seen a troll
     Kyoko:  "Well, Goo's here that means just Fluffy, Tomo, the boss, and the band
we'll be back together."
     At that moment a strange looking girl wearing a very skimpy set of armor with
bandages covering numerous lacerations enters the bar.  As they make their way over
to the table, Kyoko spots her and just shakes her head at the sight.  The girl walks
up to the table seemingly preoccupied by carving a doodle into her hand with a
     Kyoko:  "Geesh.  Don't you have any shame Tomo?  You look like you're in your
undergarments for Pete's sake.  Beside isn't it cold in that?"
     Tomo:  "Heeeeheheheheahahahahahehehehe...."
     Tomo then snaps out of her little trance and pulls herself way from her art
project and glances up at the trio at the table.
     Tomo:  "Oh, Hiiiaayaaa manager!!  What are you doing here?"
     Kyoko just stares at Tomo for an instant with a look of disbelief, then picks
her jaw up off the floor and continues her usual belittlement of her teammates.
     Kyoko:  "...you really are deficient aren't you?  The boss told us to come here
for the team meeting remember?  Goo remembered and he or she has the brain the size
of a pea."
     Tomo rests her upper lip on her dagger for a moment in contemplation.
     Tomo:  "...Uhhhh...oh that's right!  Silly me I forgot."
     A frustrated look crosses Kyoko's face.
     Tomo:  "Sorry manager, but you know me.  The sight of blood makes me all tingly
and I just kind of lose track of time."
     Tomo looks back down at her hand which is now gushing with her own blood.
     Tomo:  "Heheheheeeeeheheehheheheheheheheeeeeeeehhehehe...."
     Kyoko facial expression remains unchanged.
     Kyoko:  "...Sit your butt down Tomo."
     Tomo goes to take the seat next to Kyoko.
     Kyoko:  "Not next to me dammit!  I don't need any more 'accidental' stabbings
today thank you!  Thank god that they don't let you carry anything bigger than a
dagger.  Go sit next to Goo, I sure he...err...her...umm whatever...IT won't mind."
     Tomo takes the seat next to Goo and continues to work on her masterpiece on her
     Tomo:  "Heheheheheheeeeee...."
     Rewrite leans over to Kyoko and whispers.
     Rewrite:  "Say what's is Goo anyhows?"
     Kyoko:  "I have no dam idea.  They say it just scribbled circles over the entry
papers to the arena when the boss signed us up to fight.  So the officials just
decided to mark it as female because one of the lines went through the box.
     Rewrite:  "Wells didn't it haves to take a physical or somethings.  I dids, I
had to turn my head and cough while some guy grouped me nutzake.  I thinks the limey
bastard enjoyed its."
     Kyoko:  "He did enjoy it.  That wasn't the arena psyching that was just some guy
in front of the gate.  You were walking around bewildered and loaded with your paints
around your ankles again."
     Rewrite:  "...oh...."
     Rewrite just shrugs it off and goes back to drinking his mead.
     Kyoko:  "Ok that's four, where's Fluffy?"
     Rewrite eagerly raises his hand like he was back in grade school...if he ever
went to school in the first place that is.
     Rewrite:  "I knows I knows.  He's at the hiss usual place."
     Kyoko:  "The usual place?"
     Rewrite:  "Yep, hes...."
     The scene quickly flashes to a visual representation of Rewrite's story.  We see
the stable of the Street Walkers, and more so Miss Conduct II's room.  Where we seen
Fluffy asleep upside-down next to her in a bed, the sheets barely covering his naked
shame....  You also can't help notice the array of whips, chains, the wiffle bat, the
midget jester from the town square, and the miniature donkey covered in honey....
But that's a story for another time.  The scene quick flashes back to the bar, and
words cannot describe the look on Kyoko's face, repulsed and disgusted could come
close, but you could swear there was a hint of curiosity for a moment.
     Kyoko:  "Ugghhh...those women...No self respect."
     Rewrite:  "Yeah a mans can dos with his hard earns moneys whats hes wants to
manager.  Besides I'ves seen worsts."
     Kyoko:  "Why is it I'm not finding that hard to believe?  HEY BARWENCH!!  WE
     The ahem...waitress brings the order and rounds for everyone at the table over.
As she sets them down on the table you can see Kyoko leaning back in her stool and
glancing at the waitress's rear extremities.  Then as she turns to walk away Kyoko
deliver a harsh slap to her ass which causes her to yelp.
     Kyoko:  "Nice *hic*."
     Kyoko with a grin she turns back to her comrades, who are all staring at her,
wide eyed and pale in disbelief.  Their jaws hugging the table surface.  Kyoko's eyes
widen and look from side to side in a panic.
     Kyoko:  "What?!  What are you all looking at?!?"
     She blushes and twiddles her index fingers together.
     Kyoko:  "It's nothing, nothing...I just tend to get a little bit freaky when I
get wasted that's all...*hic*"
     She shakes her head rapidly to return her color to normal.
     Kyoko:  "Back to business!  Now that everyone is more or less accounted for,
where is the boss?"
     She looks to Rewrite who shrugs an I don't know.  Then to Goo who now is eating
its own fist.  Then over to Tomo who is repeatedly stabbing Goo over and over again
in the side, but the lummox doesn't seem to notice.  The veins on Kyoko's forehead
begin to pop out and throb.  She slams her fist down on the table.
     Everyone stops and dons a puzzled look.  Then Tomo's eyes sudden gleam and she
starts to bob up and down in her seat.
     Tomo:  "Oh!  Oh!  Oh!  I remember now manager!"
     She reaches into her breastplate and pulls out a couple of notes scribbled on
some paper and throws them down on the table.
     Tomo:  "The boss gave me these and said, 'Don't f*** things up.' "
     Kyoko grabs the notes from the table and looks them over.
     Kyoko:  "Seems to be our match up for this week...and...SON OF A B****!!"
     She vaults up and crinkles the note in her hand.
     Rewrite:  "Whats?!  Whats a matters?!"
     Kyoko:  "He didn't put me in a rematch with that s.o.b DAM IT!!"
     Rewrite grabs the note from her hand and Kyoko starts rampaging back and forth.
     Rewrite:  "It says, 'Kyoko all things come in good time, I have other concerns
for you to deal with other than Red Tiger.  Deal with it.'"
     Kyoko:  "DAMMIT!!!!!"
     Kyoko by now is bright red with the blood rushing through her veins.  She grabs
an unfortunate passer by and head butts him knocking him out.  Apparently his friend
didn't appreciate that and takes a swing at Kyoko, who catches his fist with one palm
grabs the poor soul by the collar and tosses him across the room into a group of
rather large individuals.  One incident leads to another and the entire bar erupts
into a riot scene.  Some time later after the Lapur guards have arrived on the scene
and broken most the fighting up.  We see Kyoko being hauled off, hog-tied, by several
guards screaming at the top of her lungs.
     We see Rewrite on the floor unconscious with his paints around his ankles and
several foot prints on him.  Tomo is spotted sneaking in the shadows with her blade
ready following the guards hauling Kyoko off.  And Goo, our beloved Goo is still
sitting in the same place trying to eat his hand, with the same blank look on his
face like nothing ever happened....

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                                    SHEILA'S GIFT
                                   By:  Master Beru

     The gates to the Army of Darkness compound stood open to the public with two
hired thugs to guard against anyone who might disturb the somber occasion.  Within
the walled compound, music woefully pulled people to the middle of the handful of
dark stone buildings.  In the midst of a crowd of about twenty people, every head was
bowed as the final notes were played.
     The mournful sounds of the small group of musicians faded slowly and deftly as
they closed out the "Dirge for the Dead."  The crowd watched as Rosemary, Jason, and
Paul AKA Energizer Bunny lifted their fallen comrade off the altar on the Team
Shield.  Two others with hair closely cut and nondescript uniforms could have been
men or women or one of each, but they fell in behind the other three warriors.
Guiding their steps around the altar, the three solemnly walked to the open grating
of the catacombs which would turn them back under their training site to the burial
     As the stone swallowed them from sight, mourners dispersed in quiet
conversation.  Most had already forgotten the half-known warrior who had suddenly
shown up and died just as quickly.  Their interest was in figuring out this strange
manager who seemed to have some rank, but acted like any minor manager.  Little did
they know that the very person they wanted to get to know had stood in their midst,
listening to their whispers and forming his opinions about who to approach afterward.
If any had looked back, they would have seen him standing there still once the last
visitors left.
     Watching their forms receding out the gate, Master Beru shook his head ruefully.
His face was a study in a man holding his anger in check....  Barely!  Letting out a
deep breath, he looked again at the gateway and then walked to the grate entrance,
following his team.
     The path was direct with doors along either side made of different materials and
with different locking mechanisms as security required.  He normally would check
those doors absent-mindedly, but today was different.  His steps were purposeful and
his gaze driven to the end of the hallway where voices were barely audible.  He
almost entered when his attention became piqued and he stopped short of the final
     <Rosemary> "...just is not right!  She deserves better than the worms!!  And I
don't care what Greywand ordered!"
     <Jason> "Shh!!  Keep quiet you nit-wit!"
     <R> "I am not a NIT-WIT!"
     <J> "You keep talking that loud about Greywand and we will be discussing this in
the afterlife.  NOW SHUT IT!"
     Master Beru shook his head at the disrespect from one of his officers, but
understood her perspective.  Jason's ability to calm Rosemary was almost legendary
among those who had survived their journey.  Only Freddie....
     Master Beru shook his head as he stepped toward the room, purposefully stepping
hard to make a small footfall echo ahead of him.  A slight rush of air ahead of him
was like a beacon that his signal had been heard.  He had a moment to wonder how they
would prepare themselves before he entered the room.
     Rosemary stood in front of the door glowering and his peripheral vision told him
Paul was to his right just beside the doorframe with something heavy in his hands.
Turning to his left, he smiled as Jason straightened, tucking his belt knife back
into its sheath.  A nod to Jason and the others brought grim grins from each.  Old
habits died hard after almost fifteen years.
     "Thank you for allowing me to feel out the crowd.  It was
quite...informative....  I will have some house calls for you three after this.  Now,
come here."
     Stepping to Ms. Leprechaun's still form, Master Beru drew his belt knife as he
looked down at her face.  The head wound had made it hard to make her face
presentable which brought a frown to his face.  Reaching up to her left shoulder, he
lifted the fabric of the silk shirt and slid his knife through it revealing the
graying flesh beneath.  Still respectful of her privacy, he was careful not to pull
the shirt back any further than necessary to find the Blue Falcon tattoo on her left
     How long ago since it had been the marking of those who would follow him
anywhere?  How many of those tattoos had he burnt or abandoned over the years?  How
many faces?  How many names?
     Looking up at Rosemary, he realized tears streamed down his cheeks.  His mind
had clicked over to a list of names long enough now that it took him over three
months of nights to list them all.  When had he slipped into his grief?  He pulled
the curtain in his mind that barely hid his memories of those lives HE had been
unable to prevent and all too often had sealed with his orders.
     "Ah-hem....  Yes, the falcon.  You note how Sheila ordered the three circles
added to each of your symbols?  I only told half their story when I said it was a
mark of our journey.  The other half is that this is the key to Sheila's gift, but it
has a catch."
     Looking at each in turn to be sure he had their attention, he continued, "I
warned that fifteen years of fighting experience was more than Sheila could bear
within the arenas, so she blocked your minds with one of the rings so that you fought
with the same skill as when we left.  The other two rings hold her second and third
gifts.  The second ring here allows any who are marked to be resurrected as long as
the mark is intact.  But, it also compels the person to travel to a secret location
where I have the 'prizes' training.  Once there the third circle will give its gift
as well.  The third varies according to each person and what they wanted most at the
point of her marking."
     Taking in their expressions, Master Beru continued, "The compulsion is so great,
that they will immediately leave after the fifteen minutes is up.  I am told that
they will leave in the middle of a conversation while stark naked with no supply, so
this time limit is important.  After that time, they will have no desire to face the
arena again, unless it is with those who are dead.  Then they must abide by the same
strictures of the dead and Sheila will have their fight experience shielded again to
their level at death if they choose to fight with the dead."
     Rosemary had an expression which started grim and grew to a slightly pleasant
look as her thoughts caught up to the words he had said.  Jason's carefully schooled
face took on its mischievous air again.  Paul's face held a rage initially at the
violation of Ms. Leprechaun's person, but as recognition sunk in his face held a
hopeful light.  Master Beru noted his response with interest, realizing that he had
lost a bet to one of his other captains.
     "Now, I will show you how to activate the spell, so watch carefully.  For now
Greywand has granted me time to reestablish my affairs, but this may not always be
     Reaching down, his palm rested on the tattooed Falcon and he pressed down firmly
three times before saying some words of power.  Moving his hand to Ms. Leprechaun's
head, he tilted her head back and then leaned over her mouth and breathed his breath
into her three times slowly.  On the third time, her chest rose and her skin began to
take on color again.
     A nervous laugh broke from Paul's lips behind Master Beru as Ms. Leprechaun's
form changed.  Standing back so that all could see, Master Beru and the five warriors
watched in amazement as blood flowed black and then redder until it looked like blood
again.  The blood then stopped flowing as the wound in Ms. Leprechaun's face knit
back together without so much as a scar.  The growing spots on her shirt grew more
slowly as well, with no new blood to add to their growth.  With a gasp, Ms.
Leprechaun suddenly sat up, her torn blouse falling to reveal her healed skin beneath
to match the bald area on her head where the gaping wound had once been.
     Paul crossed the room with a speed that would have bested any Striker in the
arena, but instead of attacking her, he threw his arms around her.  Crushing her body
against him their eyes found each other and they leaned together in a kiss.  As they
separated Jason and Rosemary moved in to share their joy and poke some fun at her
     Master Beru smiled and pulled Paul aside long enough to point out a bag of
rations and supplies which he had brought down earlier and set by the doorway with a
warning to be sure she left with them in hand.  Then, turning on his heel, he walked
out of the reunion with his mind on what he must do now.  So much still needed to be

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Well, what can I say, this is another pleasant surprise.  Not only did I retain the
throne, but I did it against a fine warrior who far outclasses me.  Thank you, Lapur,
for the time you have allowed me to grace your sands.  I now must humbly retire on
the Isle.

Sue Nami

                                      SPY REPORT

     It's me, The Unknown Spymaster, back to give you this week's Spy Report.  Sit 
back in your seats and we'll have more fun than a barrel of Zontanis.  It was a tough 
week for BLACK SAMURAI, to drop 5 places in the rankings.  Coming up with a solid 
3-2-0 outing, WILL DUEL 4 MEAD has advanced 3 places in the rankings.  It looks like 
the guys(?) at MEN had a good week as they went 4-1-1 to put them in 3rd place.  I 
guess steroids help!  Hey everybody, watch out for MURRY, who flew up 19 points in 
the rankings after mashing FLINT like a melon.  Keep your eye on this guy.  And 
falling like a basher in the top ten was WHIRLWIND, who dropped 13 points after a 
disappointing (to say the least) bout with KOJIRO.  Our battling duelmaster SUE NAMI 
has managed to hold the title, fending off LADYBUG's none too subtle advances.  
Better luck next time, CARDOW HUNTERS.  4 out of 5 gladiators surveyed protect the 
body, so try and avoid aiming at that location.   
     But enough of that bunch, let's get on to the wimps who like to avoid battle!  
Did you hear that VENUSIANS was most avoided team this week?  Well, knowing the 
personal hygiene of VENUSIANS' warriors, I'm not surprised!  Okay, so I may not be 
funny, but catch BLACK SAMURAI's act in the arena.  Those acrobats seem to be fairly 
deft at running from VENUSIANS.  Well dang howdy, but if challenges were votes, JASON 
would be president.  Although it may be a contest he doesn't want to win.  In a 
touching display by a 'touched' warrior, AMIE went after SNOWSHOE, who was higher by 
24 points.  Well, when the dust settled, AMIE overcame SNOWSHOE.   
     Remember that an arena is not always a safe place to be, but it is one of the 
most interesting, though!  Ask not the elves for counsel, for they will say both yes 
and no.  Silly buggers, eh?   
     Well, that wasn't too bad; Alarond told me that the people in LAPUR have no 
sense of humor.  Or maybe that they were senseless.  C'mon, Leadfoot, let's make some 
tracks.  Hasta la bye-bye.  (Loud choruses of 'Beat it, ya bum!')-- The Unknown 

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SOLAR FLARE 4427             15  11  0   113       VENUSIANS (321)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DOWN POUR 4323               14  15  2   100       FORCE OF NATURE (312)
 MACHIGAI 4506                22   7  0    94       BLACK SAMURAI (166)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CONNIE 4716                  13  10  1    82       CROC FILES (374)
 KOJIRO 4456                  17  12  1    77       BLACK SAMURAI (166)
 LADYBUG 4709                 16  11  1    71       CARDOW HUNTERS (359)
 WHIRLWIND 4325               12  18  0    68       FORCE OF NATURE (312)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MURRY 4755                    4   3  0    66       CROC FILES (374)
 FLINT 795                    18   9  0    65       KNIGHTMARE (103)
 AMIE 4718                     7  12  1    63       CROC FILES (374)
 SNOWSHOE 4712                15  12  0    57       CARDOW HUNTERS (359)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-JUNIBAN 4599                 17   4  0    56       BLACK SAMURAI (166)
 HOGUN 963                    10   3  0    53       KNIGHTMARE (103)
 ZERO VISABILITY 4495          8  11  0    52       FORCE OF NATURE (312)
 STICKET 4751                 10   2  0    50       FORCE OF NATURE (312)
 YOUR MAMA 4115                6   5  1    47       STREET WALKERS (97)
 MENSA 4442                    9  15  1    43       VENUSIANS (321)
 BRICKHOUSE 4131               7   1  0    38       STREET WALKERS (97)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CEZZARO 4719                  7  12  0    33       CARDOW HUNTERS (359)
 TOMO-CHAN 2928                3   0  0    33       WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)
 CARINA 4749                   5   7  1    31       VENUSIANS (321)
 JON 4764                      4   2  2    31       MEN (356)
 MISS CONDUCT II 4156          4   2  0    28       STREET WALKERS (97)
 DON 4767                      4   2  0    26       MEN (356)
 S'TOU 4801                    3   0  0    24       ESCAPADE (417)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 RED TIGER 4796                4   0  0    23       CARDOW HUNTERS (359)
 REWRITE 2926                  2   1  0    22       WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)
-DAIHACHI 4750                 3   2  0    21       BLACK SAMURAI (166)
 KYOKO 2929                    2   1  0    19       WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)
 TYORL 1240                    2   4  0    17       KNIGHTMARE (103)
-AKUMU 4674                    4   4  0    16       BLACK SAMURAI (166)
 GOLDIE 4805                   2   0  1    16       STREET WALKERS (97)
 JASON 2985                    3   4  0    14       ARMY OF DARKNESS (283)
 VICOTHNIC 4817                1   0  0    13       THE VENOM DIVINE (419)
 BILL 4766                     3   3  0    12       MEN (356)
 ROSEMARY 2984                 1   6  0    12       ARMY OF DARKNESS (283)
 HOFFA 4763                    2   4  0    11       MEN (356)
 KHORMASHRA 4814               1   0  1    11       THE VENOM DIVINE (419)
 BIG MOLLY 4822                1   0  0    11       ESCAPADE (417)
 LANCE 4765                    2   4  0    10       MEN (356)
 WEIPA 4793                    1   2  0    10       CROC FILES (374)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ENERGIZER BUNNY 3196          2   3  0     9       ARMY OF DARKNESS (283)
 ANKAA 4806                    1   1  0     8       VENUSIANS (321)
 HEARTWOOD 4815                1   0  1     7       THE VENOM DIVINE (419)
 SIREN 4820                    1   0  0     6       ARMY OF DARKNESS (283)
 DIRTY SANCHEZ 4802            1   2  0     5       STREET WALKERS (97)
 LUCY 4821                     1   0  0     5       CROC FILES (374)
 GOO 2927                      1   2  0     5       WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)
 FLUFFY 2930                   0   3  0     3       WILL DUEL 4 MEAD (282)
 KEETHOS 4824                  0   1  0     3       KNIGHTMARE (103)
 LITTLE MILLY 4823             0   1  0     1       ESCAPADE (417)
 SYRMA 4818                    0   1  0     1       VENUSIANS (321)
 TEALVIN 4813                  0   1  0     1       THE VENOM DIVINE (419)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
DROUGHT 4819           0  1 0 ARMY OF DARKNESS 283  KHORMASHRA 4814       542         
MS LEPRECHAUN 2988     2  4 0 ARMY OF DARKNESS 283  CARINA 4749           541         
RED TARMAHK 4795       2  2 0 CARDOW HUNTERS 359    JON 4764              542         
TIGER LILY 4732        7  6 0 CARDOW HUNTERS 359    YOUR MAMA 4115        538 REVENGED
WEIPA 4726             5  8 1 CROC FILES 374        DOWN POUR 4323        538 REVENGED
LUCY 4754              5  4 0 CROC FILES 374        DOWN POUR 4323        541         
RUFF-STUFF 4800        1  2 0 ESCAPADE 417          ARENAMASTER KYALL 388 542 NONE    
ROZ 4799               1  2 0 ESCAPADE 417          WYVERN 392            542 NONE    
ANARCHY 4825           0  1 0 KNIGHTMARE 103        HEARTWOOD 4815        542         
DA BAIT 4816           0  1 0 THE VENOM DIVINE 419  DUSKBLOOD TROLL 383   542 NONE    
ASTRIAL 4328          12 14 1 VENUSIANS 321         LADYBUG 4709          540 REVENGED
ALYA 4807              0  1 0 VENUSIANS 321         GOLDIE 4805           541         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

All -- Greetings fellow managers, arena caretaker.  I am Scion and run stable
Escapade.  Note last cycle how the fighter Goo got gooed, and think on it...your
fighters too, could get gooed. -- Scion, mgr. Escapade of Lapur

Red Tarmahk -- Gracious greetings and good-byes. -- Mr. Dollar

Goo -- No freebies here...good whip-out, though.  And I'd lift one to you for it,
buuuuut.... -- S'tou

Sue Nami -- Congrats on the invite. -- Roadkill and all the Street Walkers

Master Beru -- Welcome back!!!!  It's nice to see Lapur growing each turn. --

Mensa -- Won't be so generous???  Guess you won't be over for tea and crumpets later
then. -- Your Mama

Cezzaro -- Hon', it's not just a name...it's an attitude. ;) -- Miss Conduct

Snowshoe -- May the sun shine and the rain fall, because in order to beat you, my
only hope is you get stuck in the mud. -- Your Mama

Akuma -- Thanks for the win and the skills...please, please, please keep challenging
me. -- Miss Conduct

Daihachi -- Even though I'm pathetic...very impressive win.  Whatever strategy you
were using, keep it up and you'll go far. -- Dirty Sanchez

Amie -- Thought you had me for sure after the knockdown.  Do you think the bulls-eye
is on my forehead yet? -- Brickhouse

Venus -- Sorry about Alya but when the commission shortened my name to just Goldie I
lost my head, and tried to take yours off.  I await your bloodfeud. -- Goldie Powers,
maybe that will not cross the line :)

Red Tiger -- Then I don't bother getting out of Your Mama's bed, let alone show up
for the fight. --Fluffy

Roz -- Oh thank god, I remember to put my helmet on the right way this week. --

Street Walkers -- On behalf of my team thank you for the welcome.  Might I ask how
far would a Raspberry Sundae run up my tab?
P.S.  I didn't know I had to take the donkey with me when I left last time. Sorry. --

S'Tou -- ....*drools*.........*drools some more*.. -- Goo

Cardow Hunters -- Two turns, two losses.  While we are not the type to give up, we
have some other concerns to deal with this round.  We will meet again though.  And
tell Red Tiger that Kyoko acknowledges his skills in the sands. -- Manager of Will
Duel 4 Mead

LIKE HELL I DO!! -- Kyoko

Don -- Well fought!!  Unfortunately we appear to have fought too fast to learn much.
-- Jason

Red Tarmahk -- A hint from a friend...you don't have to just stand there.  I
appreciate it and all, but you can attack also. -- Rosemary <gloating over her first

Ankaa -- We might have to try that again soon.  I thought for sure that I had that
wrapped up.  But I think I will try my fortunes against Carina first. -- Energizer

(see spotlight for more clarification...)

Venus -- Hmm...two fights and two losses, including a death.  We'll have to watch our
step around you, it seems. -- Master Beru

All -- Please welcome Siren and Drought.  Fresh from the farm as it is, so show them
around and try not to give them too many scars in the first fights. -- Master Beru

Sue Nami -- Sorry!  Not even making the attempt on you.  Your point total is just too
high.  It's unfortunately RSI's primary determining factor in winning or losing your
fights. -- Machigai

Miss Conduct II -- A total stroke of LUCK and good fortune for you to have scored
that blow.  It most certainly wasn't due to any form of skill whatsoever.  I'm sure
one of our samurai will get to you eventually. -- Akumu

Street Walkers -- The samurai dressed completely in black attire believe it's a
pleasure to see you actively return to Lapur.  But I've got to inform you that your
team is being specifically targeted by them.  May you always fail your saving throw
upon the sands. -- An informant for the Black Samurai

Solar Flare -- Ack!  Sunburn!  Where's the aloe? -- Ladybug
P.S.  No wonder I'm red, eh?

Murry -- I don't see how a damned furry alligator can be that fast! -- Cezzaro

Kyoko -- You must be ready for a lot of mead!  I'll buy. -- Red Tiger

Your Mama -- Yours, maybe, but not MINE. -- Snowshoe

Rosemary -- You're on the side of darkness?  Granted, defeating ME is a Dark Thing to
do, but generally speaking, you don't look all that dark to me.  How about a glass of
wine? -- Red Tarmahk

Master Beru -- "Talk in theaters"?  Oooo-kay.  We won't.  We promise. -- the Cardow
P.S.  We never go to theaters anyway.

Miss Conduct -- It would be my honor and pleasure, ma'am. -- Cezzaro
P.S.  I know where to find the BEST pizza.
P.P.S.  And dress shops, if this is an issue.
P.P.P.S.  But beware that being seen in my company may lead to inclusion in an

Ghost of Astrial -- Ah, but think what you could be missing!  All the calories you
want, and never full. -- Ladybug the mournful

Our congratulations to Sue Nami, Lord Protector! -- the Cardow Hunters

Whirlwind -- Expect my bill. -- M. Granvar Chardinee

Zero -- Tell your manager that I am no normal, worthless standby, I am as bad as it
gets before the Dark Arena.  It is no sign of extraordinary weakness to lose to me,
everybody does it.  I am superior. -- Horrocksen the Terrible, Dangerous Criminal

Goldie -- I guess I was the one that needed a gentle hand. -- Ghost of Alya

Ladybug -- Wow nice skills!  Why can't you teach me that much every time? -- Solar
P.S.  Astrial sends her regards.
P.P.S.  I must have missed the bathtub comment can you tell me what turn that was?

Ghost of Ms. Leprechaun -- I apologize.  I figured you must be a mighty warrior
indeed to fight without armor and so I put all I had into the fight. -- Carina

Energizer Bunny -- Thank the gods I got your battery out when I did or that might
have been the end of me! -- Ankaa

Sticket -- One of these days I WILL take you down...and not in a good way. -- Mensa

Street Walkers -- Do not fear a reprisal for Alya's death...if a warrior can't make
it through at least one fight they are not worthy of revenge. -- Venus

Army of Darkness -- I am sorry for your loss.  Carina is prepared for any and all
Bloodfeuds. -- Venus

Connie -- Well, I am happy leaving with a .500 record against you....  I never would
have thought I could achieve a win against you after the very first one. -- Sue Nami

Juniban -- Two minutes!  I made it two minutes!  YEAH!...oh yea, well fought. -- Zero

Deadly Assassin -- Not so deadly, huh? -- Whirlwind

Mensa -- Another Venusian down...oh wait, never mind, that was just you twice. --

Ghost of Lucy -- Dang it!  A bloodfeud loop...someone get me out! -- Down Pour

Croc Files -- Sorry for the death of Lucy.  I await your next bloodfeud.

10 November 2006
     The Quest of the Best has come to an end.  Dark Knight Toker, host of the Quest,
wants to proclaim the Ultimate Victor and give a listing of prize winners.
     Lady Fern and her Flower Girls of the Consortium are the Ultimate Victors of the
Quest.  Well fought and there's nothing like coming from behind to leave us all in
the dust.  Can't wait to see you defend your title! (wink)
     Here is a complete list of managers who placed in prize positions:

1)  Lady Fern, mgr. Flower Girls
2)  Le Pentarque, mgr. Blood & Guts!
3)  Crip, mgr. Otto's Parts
4)  D.K. Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Odin's Chosen
5)  Ghab, mgr. Assassin Nation
6)  Fanthayne, mgr. Dark Raiders
7)  D.K. Toker, mgr. Silver Knights
8)  D.K. Wasby, mgr. Bronze Knights
9)  The Expatriate, mgr. Bleak Legion
10) Still the Distilled, mgr. Springborne Fair

     Thanks to all that had the gall to show up, but I really want to thank the
managers that had the mettle to survive and not run when they started getting their
butt handed to them.
                                                           Respect to All.
                                                           Quest #1 host,
                                                           Dark Knight Toker

14 November 2006
                                      A Tale of
                        Fusion Confusion Delusion Revolution
                                     as told by
                                Hammer the WordSmith

     SomeWhere Beyond ElseWhere and ElseWhen a hooded figure brooded upon the
lingering wisps of memory from days gone by.
     From the howling sands to the sanding howls the streams of thought bubbled and
flowed, winding endlessly entwined within the darkest recesses and lightest resources
of the learned and unlearned disciplines of managerial mayhem and manipulation.
     Nameless faces and faceless names floated in the swirling mists of madness
embalmed within the memories of one who knew he did not know how far reaching the
influences [both positive and negative] had rooted and flowered in the march of time
and energy expended in the historical markings of gladiatorial essence and excellence
     The tamed and the untamed coupled with the named and the unnamed resources that
spilt their sweat and blood on the sands of arenas both known and unknown had
metamorphosed into the dreamings and the schemings of the fadings of jadings and
paradings [in both public and private] amongst the elite and the indiscreet
posturings and babblings of managers becoming legends in their own minds and times.
     Hammer pondered upon beginnings and the seemingly endless myriad of endings
possibly possible among the interspersed and intertwined impossible possibilities
presently past and future.
     Echoing and reechoing in the vast depths and countless compartments along the
corridors of his mind, Hammer played and replayed the glories shared and dared in the
sixty-plus stabled arena on fabled Noblish Island DM 93.
     The training had been all too brief, but the competition generated by the multi
faceted personages inhabiting DM 93 and the sheer multitude of numbers had forever
instilled themselves in the heart and soul of the veteran manager [Hammer]; insomuch
that the migration to Niatoli Island DM 33 triggered the desire to emulate the glory
and the grandeur of the spectacle of stables vying for recognition from among the
virtually numberless no-name newbies making names for themselves as they numbered
their stables and accomplishments for all to see and behold, to the song and the
sound of the sight of clashing cold cruel steel simmering the flesh of gallant
gladiators consumed by the gory and the glory of crossing blades with the superior
and the inferior within the interior of Greywand's Global Gladiatorial Galaxy.
     Far far ago and long long away had many abandoned hope for a return to the
reminiscences revered by so many managers; predating even the generations of
gladiators graduating from Noblish Island and the years of yore and gore and
gallantry before.
     Rumblings and mumblings of a renovation rejuvenating the reflexes of managers
numbed by the numberless trysts of tourney tarnished stables began revolutionizing
the very fabric of time and space and time-honored tradition throughout the ranks of
visionary newbies and volatile veterans alike and dislike.
     History was being shaken to the core of the gore as glory and grandeur responded
to the revelry reverie revelations and reveille revolutionizing the creation of a new
arena in the making; populated by No-Tourney Warriors and Full Stable Participants
pledging to forge a new vision version of "The Fiercest and Best" for crossing blades
and crosser banter in the personal ads and team spotlight tomes.
     Now was the time for Hammer to emerge and once again merge his talent among the
gifted and grifted; answering the call to assemble the drifted [and to directly
divulge and converge with the dozens] for the destiny of destructive denizens
determined to build a new legacy upon the all-but-forgotten ashes of the old and
olden legends of times lost.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer sifted the sands in the dead of night in the desert reaches [located
SomeWhere BeYond ElseWhere and ElseWhen] to discover 5 gladiators not tourney worthy,
yet interesting enough to begin their careers in a No-Tourney Arena!
     "They need not be dispatched to the Dark Arena," the veteran manager mused as he
sorted through paperwork long discarded and vaguely forgotten, "because there is
nothing like a good Blood Feud to provide inspiration for writing personal ads in the
arena newsletter! Besides, there are times when the replacement for a warrior wounded
mortally on the arena sands fares much better than the one exchanged from Torch
     Fights by Torch Light were certainly deemed unnecessary as Hammer had already
deduced that a number of determined stables would undoubtedly congregate with High
Octane Warriors under the guidance of Higher Octane Managers to populate and
depopulate the new No-Tourney Arena currently under construction in DM 81.
     Fortunately his feeble foray into the desert would yield somewhat suitable
candidates for the newfound purposes Hammer had in mind.
     From among the candidates to be found Hammer would be rewarded in time by
     Deep into the night Hammer searched and searched until five not-so-promising
stables were uncovered in the waning hours before dawn.
     Ripper discards were scattered far and wide, but this was not the time or the
hour to let sentimental views cloud the issue at hand.  Future events would lend
themselves to a suitable Ripper replacement, especially with the prospects Hammer was
now sorting for his selection decision to dispatch to the Gladiatorial Commission for
     Most managers have the luxury of selecting the best group [or discarding the
worst group!] Hammer had the novelty of rounding up the castaways from the New
Stables paperwork accumulated long ago from Maximillian's Morya Madness contest in DM
28 that were deemed below inferior as contest prizes [and thus banished from sight!]
     Hammer scrutinized and agonized over which group of gladiators were worth the
sacks of gold coins he was prepared to release to the Gladiatorial Commission for
fees to MAINTENANCE his new stable in the No-Tourney Arena.
     After what seemed like long hours passing by, Hammer discarded one and then
another group of hopefuls.  After lengthy debate a third was cast aside.  Deciding
between the final two groups found Hammer going back to interview the rejected
candidates time and time again [until a final decision was made that Hammer could
live with and his new stable could die with!] before the final quirks were hammered
out and pen put to paper to process the prospective puny stable with the Gladiatorial
     The only solace gained from the painful process was the knowledge that other
managers would be less tempted to run stables in DM 81 populated by their tourney-
worthy warriors [under the penalty of death imposed and enforced upon tourney
experienced gladiators by the Committee being formed to police and regulate such
matters!] as sworn to and signed in good faith by each registering manager.
         [TIME JUMP]
     Hammer had worked long and hard to find suitable candidates for his stable and
now it was time to begin their training.  The paperwork had been dispatched for
registration with the Gladiatorial Commission and now was the hour in which
preparation was paramount!
     Dispatch riders had arrived with the news that Considerable Bounty was being
offered as incentive rewards to those managers sending new stables to the No-Tourney
     Hammer realized this would Up the Ante [causing greater pause in the managerial
community for selecting suitable stables!] as the creative competition was certain to
escalate and produce Serious Sword Slinging Stables Staining the Arena Sands Red!
     Obviously a serious upgrade in the quality of competition migrating to the No-
Tourney Arena in DM 81 would definitely work in favor of Hammer; enormously
increasing the death toll percentage potential amongst the ranks of his new start-up
stable in DM 81 [Sands Running Red and Blood Feuds Running Rampant as Undoubtedly
     Hammer observed the futility of his new warriors training [as well as they could
for what they were made from!] while recent memories came to the forefront of his
     When the paperwork was nearly completed and names were selected for each
Gladiator, Hammer decided to name the stable according to what he had discovered in
the darkness while searching during the dismal hours of the desert night.
     These warriors would probably be more well suited to fight by Torch Light had
they fallen into the possession of most other managers!
     Paper Warriors better suited to confronting Dark Arena Monsters [rather than
being fed to the Gladiatorial Lions certain to be populating the regular No-Tourney
     Specimens blatantly better suited for feeding upon agitated armadillo ants than
for striving to attain recognition and fame in the No-Tourney Arena [or any arena!]
     Thus was AARDVARK HAMMERZ birthed and born for Greatness or Disgrace!
         [TIME JUMP]
     Dispatch riders on winged steeds brought the news Hammer had been awaiting!
     Not since the days of training on Noblish Island in DM 93 had Hammer encountered
such collective enthusiasm for crossing blades in a selected arena such as DM 81
[recalling the time Hammer generated a gathering of newbies to transfer to Niatoli
Island in DM 33 to match wits and cross blades with the assembling veterans upon
     The Consortium had represented the veterans well in DM 33 with the SWEETNESS
stable managed by Sweety Pie.  Now the good news had arrived that The Consortium was
seen registering a stable named LIFE IMPACTS in the No-Tourney Arena!
     Former alliance mates Darque and Kat had reportedly registered DARQUE AGES and
KATHOUSE with the Gladiatorial Commission.
     Morya Madness combatant LePentarque from DM 28 had registered LA PENTARCHIE and
longtime fixture Drake in North Fork DM 47 [recently returned from a lengthy hiatus]
had been lured by the competition to register DRAKE'S HARDWARE.
     Deke [at the helm of DOC LEGRAND'S LAB] was instrumental in promoting the No-
Tourney Arena by repeatedly negotiating terms with the Gladiatorial Commission.
Others had laid the groundwork before him, but Deke raised the banner and carried it
the final distance [Supported by Countless Managers too numerous to mention!] Salute
Yourselves for Your Efforts are Most Graciously Applauded throughout Alastari!
     Apex had signed in with CAROLINA BLUE as had Ghab with ASSASSIN NATION.
     Another familiar name was found on the rolls as DeGotti registered CULT OF
BACCHUS followed by DOOM KNIGHTS managed by Blackstorm.
     Also on the rolls to be noted were AS SEEN ON TV II managed by Indimar and
RAGNAROK'S WOLVES by none other than ragnorokwolf.
     Nomad had signed on with PHANTOM REGIMENT and Silas followed suit with
     Another notable signature was that of MasterBeru with CHILDHOOD HEROES and a
penchant for scribing Team Spotlights [A Plus in Any Arena!]
     Detective Kellumbo had followed the clues and was observed enroute to
registering a yet unannounced stable [such are the ways of sleuthhounds and such!]
     Rumor had it that the manager known as Roadkill was on his way to register a
stable after his namesake and Slugbait was close behind [obliviously lost in
     Finally [in no particular disorder!] managers Grimm, Woody, Terminator, Den and
Bill were also seen elbowing their way through the gathering registration crowd to
officially announce their participation in the No-Tourney Arena.
     COUNTLESS OTHER MANAGERS were known to be pondering the consequences of sending
stables to a No-Tourney Arena and had yet to make the commitment public knowledge as
to their intentions.
     Howbeit the Gladiatorial Commission was reportedly swamped with requests for New
Stable Registration Forms [whether for the Tempe Facer or No-Tourney Arena was
anybody's guess at the present time!]
     Judging from the furtive figures darting and ducking in the shadows and
alleyways throughout Alastari [as well as those huddled in taverns or communicating
with one another by various means available!] the success of such a No-Tourney Arena
was Ballooning far Beyond the Expectations of the Promoters and Petitioners Bar None!
had the Best Potential for attracting and assembling a congregation of competitors
rivaling the numbers of Noblish Island from days gone by!
       JANUARY 2007 MARKS THE BEGINNING of a Journey where both Newbies and Veterans
join together in a Historic Assemblage Celebrating the Crossing of Blades between
some of the Best Managed Stables in all of Alastari [Known and Unknown!]
                 "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper"
                                          Minister of War

30 November 2006
NEED A TURF WAR ALLIANCE??  Master Beru, Wretch, Reaper, and Xoan have come together
to form an Alliance for the TURF WAR in DM47 with no regards for experience in
competitions or even the game.  If you want to enjoy the thrills of the competition,
we have space for up to three more managers.  Contact Master Beru at
d_spinella@msn.com for more information or send a note to Master Beru at DM 29--Army
of Darkness.  If you are interested, we need to move quickly, since the contest
starts in January and there are a few requirements to meet to participate.  May your
blades find the chinks in your enemy's armor. -- Master Beru

6 December 2006

As an American I honor my cultural heritage by stealing any good idea.  This idea was
originally proposed by Lord Xiang in November 2005.  RSI will be opening the arena
(81) for teams willing to sign the following pledge:

*  I pledge that I will not send warriors from this arena to a Tournament, nor will I
   use a Tournament prize on a warrior from this arena.
*  I pledge to run a full team when I run turns in this arena.  If circumstances
   preclude my running less than a full team I will notify the Player Committee.
*  I agree to abide by the decisions of the Player Committee.
*  I understand that any warrior that participates in a Tournament shall be sent to
   the Dark Arena until they are dead.
*  I understand that any warrior that receives a Tournament prize shall be send to
   the Dark Arena until they are dead.

The following are the rules for joining this No-Tournament arena
1.  No tournament play for warriors in this arena (Dead tournament or otherwise).
2.  One team per manager.
3.  Teams start with new rollup (or a zero fight equivalent team is transferred into
    this arena.)
4.  No tourney prizes allowed to modify warriors in the arena.
5.  Twenty teams required, per RSI.
6.  Waivers are required to allow self-regulation on tourney ban, granting RSI
    authority to Dark Arena any warrior that participates in a Tournament (until the
    warrior is dead).
7.  Rotating council to enforce tourney ban and maintain arena integrity.

The main purpose of the Player Committee is to maintain fair play in the arena:
*  Warriors that participate in Tournaments will be sent to the Dark Arena until they
   are dead.  This means that the Player Committee has the power to send another
   player's warrior to the Dark Arena
*  Managers that abuse the rules of the Arena may be banned/transferred from the

The player with the most votes for Chairman will fill slot 1 [Chairperson] and that
term expires end of March 2007.
The player with the most votes overall will fill slot 5 and that term expires end of
November 2007.
The player with the second most votes overall will fill slot 4 and that term expires
end of September 2007.
The player with the third most votes overall will fill slot 3 and that term expires
end of November 2007.
The player with the fourth most votes overall will fill slot 2 and that term expires
end of May 2007.

During the month that the chairperson's term expires the Player Committee will select
one of the remaining 4 players to be the next chairperson.  During the month that any
member's term expires the arena will vote for a different player to join the Players'

If you want to be a candidate for the player committee:
1.  Post a message in the Duel2 Forum at
2.  E-Mail Deke at DekeYoung@Comcast.NET
3.  Send a Diplomatic Note to Doc LeGrand's Lab [ARENA 81]

There are 4 steps to joining this arena
1) Send in a new team rollup to RSI with the following pledge taped/stapled to the
rollup sheet, or transfer a ZERO FIGHT EQUIVALENT TEAM to Arena 81 and send RSI the
following form.

No-Tournament Arena (81)
*  I pledge that I will not send warriors from this team to a Tournament, nor will I
   use a Tournament prize on a warrior from this team.
*  I pledge to run a full team when I run turns in this arena.  If circumstances
   preclude my running less than a full team I will notify the Player Committee.
*  I agree to abide by the decisions of the Player Committee.
*  I understand that any warrior that participates in a Tournament shall be sent to
   the Dark Arena until they are dead.
*  I understand that any warrior that receives a Tournament prize shall be send to
   the Dark Arena until they are dead.

[Sign your name here ..............................................................]

2) [Optional] post a message on the Duel 2 Forums in the Creating a No-Tournament
   Arena thread
3) [Optional] send an e-mail to DekeYoung@Comcast.NET with your team name
4) [Optional] Send a Diplomatic Note to Doc LeGrand's Lab in Arena 81 with your team
   name and intent to join Arena 81 and abide by the Arena rules.

     RSI will be processing overviews for this arena as soon as you send them into
     The first turn will run in January 2007.  This will be a normal speed arena.
     While I am encouraging everyone to use TEAM MAINTENANCE it is not mandatory.
The intent is that players that run turns will run a full team.  One warrior teams
are discouraged and will a topic for the Player Committee to resolve.
     I also encourage players to join the Duel2 Yahoo Group for faster updates and
feedback.  http://games.groups.yahoo.com/group/duel/

There are already 29 managers already committed to the project
x    Apex = CAROLINA BLUE -- Cf PC -- Cf PCC
x    Bill (I think this is the same person) = CLUB CUTTHROAT
x    Blackstorm = DARK ENCLAVE -- Cf PC
     Master Darque = DARQUE AGES
x    DeGotti = CULT OF BACCHUS
x    Drake = DRAKE'S HARDWARE -- Cf PC
     Grimm = FURRY FURY
     Ikillu = BATTLE GRUNTS
x    Indimar = AS SEEN ON TV II
x    Kat = KATHOUSE
x    Kellumbo = KELLUMBO'S KIDS
x    Le Pentarque = LA PENTARCHIE
x    Master Beru = CHILDHOOD HEROES -- Cf PC
x    Pauly = ALE HOUSE MERCS
     Ragnarokwolf = RAGNAROK'S WOLVES
x    Rillon = THE DRAUGS
x    Roadkill = STREET WALKERS
     Seraphim = LEGION OF SOLITUDE
x    Terminator = WARMASTERS
x    The Consortium = LIFE IMPACTS -- Cf PC -- Cf PCC

X  = 17 Team Rollups received by RSI as of 29 November 2006
Cf = Candidate for
PC = Player Committee
PCC = Player Committee Chairperson

     Deke Young will not be part of the inaugural Player Committee, maybe later once
the Arena direction has been developed.
     Any questions can be directed to DekeYoung@Comcast.NET
     I will track Awards in Arena 81, which will be posted on a web site and included
in the following turn's newsletter.

The Honor of Sunset Award:
     The first team to reach 10 Team Kills.  In the case that there is more than one
team that achieves 10 Team Kills on the same turn, I will pay the Award to the team
with the most kills.  If two or more teams are tied for Team Kills, I will prolong
the contest until one team has the most Kills in the Arena (it does not have to be
one of the teams that first reached 10 Team Kills.)

The Race to Victory Award:
     The first team to reach 75 Team Wins.  In the case that there is more than one
team that reaches 75 Team wins on the same turn, I will pay the Award to the team

with the most wins.  If two or more teams are tied for Team Wins, I will prolong the
contest until one team has the most wins in the Arena (it does not have to be one of
the teams that first reached 75 Team Wins.)

The Commitment to Change Award:
     The first team to reach 125 Team Fights.  In the case that there is more than
one team that reaches 125 Team Fights on the same turn, I will pay the Award to the
team with the most fights.  If two or more teams are tied for Team Fights, I will
prolong the contest until one team has the most fights in the Arena (it does not have
to be one of the teams that first reached 125 Team Fights.)  I hope I never give out
this award {figure it out on your own.}

The Team Advancement Award:
     The first team to graduate 5 warriors to ADM.  In the case that there is more
than 1 team that graduates 5 warriors on the same turn, I will pay the Award to the
first team to graduate 6 warriors.  In the case that there is more than 1 team that
graduates 6 warriors on the same turn, I will pay the Award to the first team to
graduate 7 warriors, and so on.

The Iron Throne Award:
     The first team to hold the Duelmaster for 10 turns STARTING ON TURN 11.

The Stylemaster Award.
     The first team to hold the Stylemaster Award in 7 different styles, STARTING ON
TURN 11.  If two teams obtain Stylemaster Awards in 7 styles on the same turn, the
goal will be increased to 8 Styles.

Team Recognition Points:  The total recognition points for all warriors in the arena
The Iron Throne Ledger:  We will track who has been the Duelmaster every turn in
     Arena history.
Iron Throne Counter:  The total number of times a team has been the Duelmaster.
Composite Team Stylemaster awards:  The number of times a team has had any of the 10
     Stylemasters.  Having 2 Stylemasters = 2 points that turn.
Challenge win percentage:  How often your warriors win when they challenge.
Challenge Defender rate:  How often your warriors win when they WERE challenged.
Team Invitations:  Number of warriors graduated to ADM.
Team Graduation Rate:  Total team fights/Graduated Warriors.
Team Kill Percentage:  Total of team Kills/Team Fights
Team Death Percentage:  Total of Team Deaths/Team Fights
Team Revenge Rate: Number of Deaths/BloodFeuds Revenged (Note that the Dark Arena
     will be counted as not-revenged.)  You only get credit for one successful
     BloodFeud per death (though I encourage you to BloodFeud all 4 turns.)
Current Win Streaks:  Warriors that have gone the most turns without losing or
     missing a turn.
Team Yahtzee counter:  Number of times a team has gone 5-0 in a turn.
Team Bagel counter:  Number of times a team has fought without a win.
Team Dark Arena counter:  Number of times each team has used the Dark Arena.
The Most Feared (avoided) Team counter:  Number of turns that team was the most
     avoided team.

     We will create a web page just for Arena 81 category leaders.
     Hope to see you there. -- Deke

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

RUFF-STUFF was butchered by ARENAMASTER KYALL in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
ROZ was slaughtered by WYVERN in a 1 minute gruesome Dark Arena battle.
DA BAIT was luckily killed by  DUSKBLOOD TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
CONNIE lost to DOWN POUR in a 1 minute master's Bloodfeud brawl.
ENERGIZER BUNNY was overpowered by CARINA in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud fight.
MACHIGAI was bested by SOLAR FLARE in a 2 minute gory expert's Challenge Title brawl.
AMIE devastated SNOWSHOE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
STICKET viciously subdued BRICKHOUSE in a dull 27 minute gruesome Challenge fight.
YOUR MAMA vanquished CEZZARO in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
FLUFFY was defeated by BILL in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
KYOKO won victory over ANKAA in a 2 minute brutal novice's Challenge fight.
TOMO-CHAN handily defeated JASON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
WEIPA was subdued by RED TIGER in a 2 minute amateur's Challenge match.
REWRITE overcame ROSEMARY in a 2 minute Challenge contest.
GOLDIE luckily beat LANCE in a 2 minute bloody Challenge match.
SUE NAMI overpowered LADYBUG in a popular 1 minute gruesome mismatched conflict.
WHIRLWIND was defeated by KOJIRO in a 2 minute expert's struggle.
FLINT was overcome by MURRY in a 2 minute bout.
HOGUN viciously subdued MENSA in a 3 minute bloody brawl.
MISS CONDUCT II was overpowered by ZERO VISABILITY in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
TYORL savagely defeated GOO in a tiresome 11 minute gory bout.
HOFFA unbelievably bested DIRTY SANCHEZ in a crowd pleasing 4 minute gory competition.
JON assassinated RED TARMAHK in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
DON overpowered CULT MEMBER in a 1 minute uneven fray.
S'TOU slimly won victory over KEETHOS in a 3 minute brutal novice's contest.
KHORMASHRA assassinated DROUGHT in a 1 minute brutal uneven fight.
HEARTWOOD savagely slew ANARCHY in a 2 minute gory novice's duel.
TEALVIN was savagely defeated by SIREN in a crowd boring 10 minute novice's melee.
VICOTHNIC overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
SYRMA was handily defeated by BIG MOLLY in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
LUCY defeated LITTLE MILLY in a 4 minute gruesome beginner's fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   9         TOTAL PARRY       26 -  20 -  0      57  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   8         AIMED BLOW        20 -  16 -  0      56  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  8         SLASHING ATTACK   20 -  17 -  1      54  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      8         WALL OF STEEL     29 -  26 -  3      53  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    7         BASHING ATTACK    22 -  20 -  5      52  |
|AIMED BLOW                       5         STRIKING ATTACK   21 -  21 -  1      50  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     5         PARRY-STRIKE      13 -  15 -  1      46  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  4         PARRY-LUNGE        3 -   4 -  0      43  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    2         LUNGING ATTACK    25 -  34 -  1      42  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -   4 -  0      33  |

Turn 542 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

BASHING ATTACK     6 -  2     LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  6         3  WALL OF STEEL  
AIMED BLOW         3 -  2     TOTAL PARRY        2 -  6         2  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       3 -  2     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         2  STRIKING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL      4 -  3                                       2  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  1                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    4 -  4                                       1  TOTAL PARRY    
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  2     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
SLASHING ATTACK  SOLAR FLARE 4427           15  11  0  113 VENUSIANS (321)
TOTAL PARRY      MACHIGAI 4506              22   7  0   94 BLACK SAMURAI (166)
STRIKING ATTACK  CONNIE 4716                13  10  1   82 CROC FILES (374)
LUNGING ATTACK   KOJIRO 4456                17  12  1   77 BLACK SAMURAI (166)
WALL OF STEEL    LADYBUG 4709               16  11  1   71 CARDOW HUNTERS (359)
BASHING ATTACK   MURRY 4755                  4   3  0   66 CROC FILES (374)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is SNOWSHOE 4712.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was DIRTY SANCHEZ 4802.  The ten other most popular fighters were HEARTWOOD 4815, 
SOLAR FLARE 4427, KOJIRO 4456, MURRY 4755, HOGUN 963, KEETHOS 4824, AMIE 4718, FLUFFY 
2930, ANKAA 4806, and TOMO-CHAN 2928.

The least popular fighter this week was BRICKHOUSE 4131.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were STICKET 4751, GOO 2927, TEALVIN 4813, TYORL 1240, SYRMA 4818, ANARCHY 
4825, DROUGHT 4819, RED TARMAHK 4795, FLINT 795, and JASON 2985.

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

SUE NAMI (29-4097) FORCE OF NATURE (312)

                            JANUARY FACE-TO-FACE IN TEMPE!

Our next winter FTF will be held in Tempe, Arizona, January 12-14, 2007.  It will be 
held at the Embassy Suites Hotel in Tempe, Arizona (480-894-7444), the same hotel as 
last year by popular request.  Room rates are $149.00 per night, 1-4 occupancy, which 
includes full cooked breakfast, complimentary manager's reception (yes, really!), free 
airport shuttle, free parking, high speed internet (for extra charge), fitness center, 
jacuzzi, and pool.  The rooms are blocked--please make your reservation by December 15 
before the block is released!  (This is prime season for Phoenix, and several people 
were unable to book rooms last year because they waited too long.)  Look for 
transportation info in the tournament information sheet.  We hope you're all looking 
forward to it and that we will see you there!