DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 05/23/2015    Duedate: 06/19/2015

CHIMLEVTAL ARENA

DM-31    TURN-383

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

PRIVATE LAPDANCE
MILITARY MAYHEM (89)
(31-5656) [17-3-1,115]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

PRIVATE LAPDANCE               POSITION IS EMPTY
MILITARY MAYHEM (89)           
(31-5656) [17-3-1,115]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

ARSON                          FHTAGN
THE CANUCKS (58)               WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U! (378)
(31-6439) [16-14-0,76]         (31-6516) [7-15-0,43]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

JUST DESSERTS (569)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. JUST DESSERTS (569)         50
2. MILITARY MAYHEM (89)        40      USEFUL WEAPONS (636)
3. WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U! (378)   21      Unchartered Team
4. OTTOBAHN (639)               0
5. THE STORM REAVERS (408)      0      BLANK (123)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 USEFUL WEAPONS (636)      93  44  3 67.9   1/ 5 JUST DESSERTS (569)       8  5 2
 2/ 2 BASH BROS OCEAN (627)     68  42  5 61.8   2/ 1 BASH BROS OCEAN (627)     8  6 1
 3- 3 DEVIL'S MAYHEM (580)      52  36  1 59.1   3/ 2 THE CANUCKS (58)          7  6 0
 4- 4 NUMBERS GAME (403)       354 290 25 55.0   4/ 3 AVENGERS (146)            7  8 1
 5- 5 OTTOBAHN (639)            40  34  3 54.1   5/ 4 USEFUL WEAPONS (636)      5  3 1
 6/ 6 WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U (378) 374 323 15 53.7   6/ 0 MILITARY MAYHEM (89)      3  2 0
 7/ 0 MILITARY MAYHEM (89)     300 262 19 53.4   7/ 8 WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U (378)  3  7 0
 8- 7 LANGUAGE BARRIER (646)    33  29  2 53.2   8- 6 OTTOBAHN (639)            3  7 0
 9/ 8 AVENGERS (146)           345 355 27 49.3   9-11 NUMBERS GAME (403)        2  1 0
10/ 9 JUST DESSERTS (569)       79  83  5 48.8  10- 7 LANGUAGE BARRIER (646)    2  2 0
11-10 THE STORM REAVERS (408)  201 230 20 46.6  11- 9 THE STORM REAVERS (408)   1  1 0
12/11 THE CANUCKS (58)         333 400 28 45.4  12-12 DEVIL'S MAYHEM (580)      0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

I'm off to the Dark Arena, then retirement (hopefully without a resurrection in 
between).
                                          -- Mr Freeze

Notes from Assur:
Mr. Freeze graduates 11(1)-10(1)-8-21-17-8-11 TP Good/Good
Skills: 8/25/20/28/22/16
Faves: MO/VL GS Parry tactic Riposte Learn

                                      SPY REPORT

     It is I, Novgorodny Vir, Spymaster of Spymasters.  Look on my work, ye mighty, 
and despair!  BASH BROS OCEAN?  Who?  JUST DESSERTS is the top team these days, 
buddies!  Nothing works for a team like victory (How's that for a perceptive 
observation?) as JUST DESSERTS can attest...  JUST DESSERTS had cause to celebrate, 
after MOTHER LODE got 19 points by beating ODACHI.  A certain someone should cut down 
on the drinking and practice more, after losing 15 points to DR. SOX.  (Discrete 
enough, PRAIRIE FIRE?) Well, Duelmaster MR. FREEZE Dark Arena Challenged DARK ARENA's 
ARENAMASTER LEVTANI.  Is a 16-5-0 good enough?  The crowds were amazed this turn, as 
ARENAMASTER LEVTANI killed the Duelmaster, MR. FREEZE, leaving BASH BROS OCEAN in 
mourning.  Even 90 points weren't good enough to save MR. FREEZE from PRIVATE 
LAPDANCE.  CHIMLEVTAL welcomes PRIVATE LAPDANCE as the new Duelmaster!  So who was 
the warrior seen charging into immovable walls and challenging dead trees?  Someone's 
got a basic problem...   
     So much to report, so little time!  Like the noble eagle soaring amongst the 
mountaintops, so stand the warriors of OTTOBAHN, alone and unchallenged.  The 
warriors of OTTOBAHN found their efforts at combat frustrated as WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U! 
apparently had more important things to do than fight.  If challenges were horses, 
MOTHER LODE could open up a fast food joint!   
     Ah, the duel!  The roar of the oppenent, the smell of the crowd!  You've heard 
about SOJUTSU of AVENGERS.  Death plays no favorites, and neither do I.  What was a 
12-12-1 doing on the fields in the first place?  I get a special thrill from seeing 
innocent boy like CAPTAIN MORGAN from MILITARY MAYHEM get pointlessly killed.  Good 
show, CHOCO TACO!  (No mercy.) Never one to advocate diplomacy and restraint, I was 
pleased to see USEFUL WEAPONS retaliate against BASH BROS OCEAN in bloodfeud!  Oh 
hard!  that to strike a flame, the match itself must needs be wasting!   
     All good things must come to an end.  As the seasons change, and the creatures 
of the wild change also, so do I feel a yearning to leave this place.  Like a mixed 
metaphor, and an overtaxed simile, I now bid CHIMLEVTAL farewell-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PRIVATE LAPDANCE 5656        17   3  1   115       MILITARY MAYHEM (89)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-STRATOS 6499                 10   4  0   110       OTTOBAHN (639)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 RYO 6470                     12  14  1    90       AVENGERS (146)
 ISHIBO 6441                  11  21  1    90       AVENGERS (146)
-COBOL 6617                   11   3  1    87       LANGUAGE BARRIER (646)
-NINE-TAILED FOX 6359         11   7  0    86       NUMBERS GAME (403)
-CANDLESTICK 6623              6   1  0    84       USEFUL WEAPONS (636)
-INFERNO SERPENT 5662          9   6  0    77       DEVIL'S MAYHEM (580)
 ARSON 6439                   16  14  0    76       THE CANUCKS (58)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DR. SOX 6488                 11  12  0    66       WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U! (378)
 PUMPKIN ROLL 6431             8   2  1    66       JUST DESSERTS (569)
-BRUTALIX 6646                 5   0  0    66       WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U! (378)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-HUAYRA 6501                   8   7  1    64       OTTOBAHN (639)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MOTHER LODE 6454              8   2  0    56       JUST DESSERTS (569)
 WAVES TOO BIG 6659            5   0  0    55       BASH BROS OCEAN (627)
 QUEEN OF THE NORTH 6466      14   9  0    54       THE CANUCKS (58)
 SHARK 6525                   11  11  0    51       BASH BROS OCEAN (627)
-HAJJ'IL THAN'NI 5664         10   7  0    50       DEVIL'S MAYHEM (580)
 ODACHI 6569                   7   9  1    50       AVENGERS (146)
 PRAIRIE FIRE 6527            11   9  1    47       THE CANUCKS (58)
-YETI 6497                     9   8  1    44       OTTOBAHN (639)
 CHOCO TACO 6390               4   2  1    44       JUST DESSERTS (569)
 FHTAGN 6516                   7  15  0    43       WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U! (378)
-ELUSIVE 12TH 6432             5   2  0    42       NUMBERS GAME (403)
-C++ 6619                      8   6  0    40       LANGUAGE BARRIER (646)
-ARNAGE 6563                   6   5  0    40       OTTOBAHN (639)
 THE KITCHEN SINK 6388         4   3  0    34       JUST DESSERTS (569)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ADIOS AMIGO 6634              4   5  3    33       AVENGERS (146)
 WET NOODLE 6556               5   4  0    32       USEFUL WEAPONS (636)
-BASIC 6627                    5   2  0    31       LANGUAGE BARRIER (646)
-DENTARG 6621                  5   3  0    28       THE STORM REAVERS (408)
-DRANOSH 6631                  3   2  1    24       THE STORM REAVERS (408)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PRIVATE PLACE 6522            2   1  0    23       MILITARY MAYHEM (89)
-WHIP 6629                     3   2  0    21       USEFUL WEAPONS (636)
-ENSLAVED ANGEL 5660           5   4  0    19       DEVIL'S MAYHEM (580)
-FORTRAN 6656                  3   0  0    18       LANGUAGE BARRIER (646)
 BOMBARDIER JET 6528           1   0  0    17       MILITARY MAYHEM (89)
 SEAGULL 6649                  2   4  2    16       BASH BROS OCEAN (627)
-311 6576                      2   2  0    16       NUMBERS GAME (403)
-MERAK 6600                    2   3  0    13       OTTOBAHN (639)
 KLONDIKE 6632                 2   5  0    11       THE CANUCKS (58)
-FJOLNIR 6660                  1   1  1     8       LANGUAGE BARRIER (646)
 HAT PIN 6666                  1   1  1     5       USEFUL WEAPONS (636)
 DA1 6674                      0   1  0     1       WHAMMO & THUDDA 4U! (378)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
SOJUTSU 6482           12 12 1 AVENGERS 146         PUMPKIN ROLL 6431     383   
MR. FREEZE 6524        16  6 0 BASH BROS OCEAN 627  ARENAMASTER LEVT      383  NONE
NUDIST 6650             1  3 0 BASH BROS OCEAN 627  DRANOSH 6631          380  REVENGED
SUNK 6673               0  1 0 BASH BROS OCEAN 627  WURM KIN              383  NONE
CAROL COOKIE 6668       0  1 0 JUST DESSERTS 569    WURM KIN              383  NONE
CAPTAIN MORGAN 6283     4  2 0 MILITARY MAYHEM 89   CHOCO TACO 6390       383   
RAW RECRUIT #4 6622     0  1 0 MILITARY MAYHEM 89   THE RAGE MAN          383  NONE
MAPLE LEIF 6662         1  2 0 THE CANUCKS 58       ADIOS AMIGO 6634      381  JUST REVENGED
KRAGOSH DRAGONBL 6661   0  1 0 THE STORM REAVER 408 SEAGULL 6649          379  REVENGED
WALKING CANE 6645       1  4 0 USEFUL WEAPONS 636   SEAGULL 6649          382  JUST REVENGED

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Mr. Freeze, you're graduating?  What?!  I didn't get to have my way with you yet, you 
shifty sidestepper.  I wanted to light you up and melt you like wax, with a light tap 
on your head with my heavy end.  Lucky you. -- Candlestick, Useful Weapons

Mr. Freeze, bye bye.  We glad yu go.  Yup. -- Smithy, Useful Weapons

Huarya, that was kinda easy, but then, as the "spymaster said", strikers always beat 
slashers.  Be it known, though, that one cannot always trust what this spymaster says.  
Can one? -- Candlestick, Useful Weapons

Convicted Thief, it was nice meeting you, nice beating you, and nice killing you.  
Veni. Vidi. Vici. -- Hat Pin, Useful Weapons

Seagull? Seagull of Bash Bros Whatever? You broke our Walking Cane?  You lout! He was 
a beautiful basher at 16(+1)-3-8-7(+1)-21(+1)-12-21(+1). May I be the first to thank 
you. -- Lady Smith, Useful Weapons Publicist, Interpreter, Admin Assistant, et al

Me git yuh, Seagull. Yuh poop on me walk cane? Me eet gull on turkey day. -- Smithy

A note to all from Smithy (interpreted): We Useful Weapons never bloodfeud unless we 
want to. -- Lady Smith (certain she got that word for word)

I want to fight! I do! Whip Wilson and Lash Larue were my heroes! -- Whip, Useful 
Weapons

Dranosh -- That'll teach you. -- Shark

Arnage -- Come back when you grow up and can handle the big boy waves. -- Waves too 
Big

Smithy -- Part of me hopes that the Walking Cane had one of those two sets of numbers.  
The other part regrets that my Seagull once again took a life. -- Assur

LG -- My apologies for a pretty rude personal ad last time.  I don't know what I was 
thinking (actually I do, I was still mourning the loss of Litter on the sands). -- 
Assur

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

MR. FREEZE was butchered by ARENAMASTER LEVTANI in a 2 minute Dark Arena fight.
CAROL COOKIE was murdered by WURM KIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena melee.
RAW RECRUIT #4 was narrowly killed by THE RAGE MAN in a 2 minute Dark Arena fight.
SUNK was slaughtered by WURM KIN in a crowd pleasing 3 minute gory Dark Arena brawl.
ARSON savagely defeated ADIOS AMIGO in a 2 minute mismatched Bloodfeud match.
WET NOODLE defeated SEAGULL in a 2 minute Bloodfeud struggle.
PUMPKIN ROLL savagely slew SOJUTSU in a 2 minute bloody Challenge brawl.
DR. SOX overpowered PRAIRIE FIRE in a 1 minute uneven Challenge melee.
FHTAGN was unbelievably bested by QUEEN OF THE NORTH in a 8 minute Challenge duel.
PRIVATE LAPDANCE won victory over RYO in a 2 minute veteran's Title fight.
ISHIBO overpowered VENOMOUS CONCUBINE in a 1 minute one-sided melee.
ODACHI was luckily beaten by MOTHER LODE in a exciting 4 minute bloody match.
CAPTAIN MORGAN was barely slain by CHOCO TACO in a exciting 1 minute brutal contest.
SHARK bested DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute bout.
WAVES TOO BIG overcame THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a 2 minute gory conflict.
THE KITCHEN SINK won victory over KLONDIKE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute gruesome bout.
PRIVATE PLACE handily defeated HAT PIN in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
BOMBARDIER JET unbelievably bested DA1 in a tiring 6 minute brutal brawl.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         TOTAL PARRY       41 -  17 -  0      71  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   5         PARRY-RIPOSTE      5 -   3 -  0      63  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      5         SLASHING ATTACK   28 -  25 -  2      53  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  4         WALL OF STEEL     12 -  12 -  0      50  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         STRIKING ATTACK   22 -  22 -  1      50  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         AIMED BLOW        22 -  25 -  5      47  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         LUNGING ATTACK    37 -  45 -  7      45  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         PARRY-LUNGE       10 -  13 -  2      43  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-STRIKE       8 -  11 -  0      42  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         BASHING ATTACK    22 -  34 -  4      39  |

Turn 383 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

WALL OF STEEL      2 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  2         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  2     AIMED BLOW         0 -  3         3  STRIKING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     3 -  2     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  2         1  WALL OF STEEL  
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  2     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         1  PARRY-LUNGE    
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  2     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                                                                1  SLASHING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    PRIVATE LAPDANCE 5656      17   3  1  115 MILITARY MAYHEM (89)
STRIKING ATTACK  ARSON 6439                 16  14  0   76 THE CANUCKS (58)
LUNGING ATTACK   PUMPKIN ROLL 6431           8   2  1   66 JUST DESSERTS (569)
TOTAL PARRY      MOTHER LODE 6454            8   2  0   56 JUST DESSERTS (569)
SLASHING ATTACK  WAVES TOO BIG 6659          5   0  0   55 BASH BROS OCEAN (627)
BASHING ATTACK   THE KITCHEN SINK 6388       4   3  0   34 JUST DESSERTS (569)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is ARSON 6439.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
FHTAGN 6516.  The ten other most popular fighters were ARSON 6439, ODACHI 6569, WET 
NOODLE 6556, PRIVATE LAPDANCE 5656, WAVES TOO BIG 6659, RAW RECRUIT #4 6622, PUMPKIN 
ROLL 6431, THE KITCHEN SINK 6388, PRIVATE PLACE 6522, and SUNK 6673.

The least popular fighter this week was BOMBARDIER JET 6528.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were DA1 6674, HAT PIN 6666, PRAIRIE FIRE 6527, KLONDIKE 6632, 
ISHIBO 6441, RYO 6470, QUEEN OF THE NORTH 6466, CAROL COOKIE 6668, SHARK 6525, and 
CHOCO TACO 6390.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

PRIVATE LAPDANCE (31-5656) MILITARY MAYHEM (89)

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

MR. FREEZE (31-6524) BASH BROS OCEAN (627)

                             * * * * *   MEMO  * * * * *

From:       The Office of Accurate Census Reporting, Gladiatorial Commission
To:         All Managers

In the interest of preserving our natural resources and preventing managerial writer's 
cramp, the census form has been eliminated, effective immediately.  Managers may 
register their warriors' races and/or favorite sayings by simply writing them on a 
separate piece of paper and submitting them to the Commission.  Each warrior may have 
up to 15 favorite sayings.  Each saying must be categorized Jeer, Gloat, Boredom, Ouch, 
Victory and may be up to 70 characters long.  For any questions, please contact the 
Gladiatorial Commission.