Date   : 12/10/2008    Duedate: 12/23/2008


DM-32    TURN-591

This Weeks Top Honors


(32-4767) [14-6-1,143]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

WAR EAGLE                      EAST TO WEST
(32-4767) [14-6-1,143]         (32-4929) [3-2-0,35]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

(32-4706) [11-6-1,118]         (32-4853) [9-11-0,56]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. ANGELS OF PAIN (360)        47
2. SARATOGA GLORY (352)        42      SARATOGA GLORY (352)
3. WAX HOSTILE (399)           32      Unchartered Team
4. DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)       11
5. RILL'S GCSC2 (370)           5      CHRISTIAN ROCK (415)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 SARATOGA GLORY (352)     220 125 20 63.8   1/ 4 SARATOGA GLORY (352)     10  5 2
 2/ 2 DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)    %1061 635 54 62.6   2/ 3 ANGELS OF PAIN (360)      9  5 4
 3/ 3 ANGELS OF PAIN (360)     235 156 14 60.1   3/ 1 DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)     9  6 0
 4/ 4 BARN OF HORRORS (358)    100  79  6 55.9   4/ 2 ROMAN HEROES (73)         8  7 0
 5/ 5 ROMAN HEROES (73)        637 515 69 55.3   5/ 5 BARN OF HORRORS (358)     5 10 1
 6/ 6 RILL'S GCSC2 (370)       151 151  5 50.0   6/ 9*CHRISTIAN ROCK (415)      2  2 0
 7/ 8*CHRISTIAN ROCK (415)       3   4  0 42.9   7/ 8 WAX HOSTILE (399)         1  9 0
 8/11 WAX HOSTILE (399)         20  56  0 26.3   8/11 RILL'S GCSC2 (370)        0  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

          The Caesar Chronicles:  Observations from the Pinnacle of Greatness
                        A Day in the Life of an Arvat Legend...

     The site was something to behold, vast and teeming with the activity of
thousands.  The Arvat morning sun burned brightly in a cloudless sky.  Large plumes
of black smoke rose through the air, caused by the large scale burning of fresh cut
wood.  The Arvat Riverfront was undergoing major development from Caesar Industries,
LLC.  Large tracts of forest were being hacked down and burned by large coolie work
gangs bearing axes and saws.  Logs drifted down the river and huge areas of wetlands
were under fire, torched by the coolies in an effort to quickly clear the area.  A
true ecological disaster was well underway....  Only Treebeard and a marauding group
of Ents were missing from this picture....
     Nearby, in the massive construction headquarters, Caesar and his henchmen
surveyed the site.  Roman engineers filled the building, leaning over scrolls and
blueprints of the site.  These engineers, considered amongst the finest in Alastari,
were also responsible for the construction of the Temple of Caesar, Caesar's Country
Club, Caesar's Pool Hall over in Chimlevtal and many other feats of construction
brilliance.  They were the brains behind the operation and they commanded a virtual
unlimited labor pool.  Thousands of coolies swarmed the riverfront area, digging,
hacking, draining, sawing, burning and clearing the land.  Giant boulders were being
dragged away by coolie laborers with large harnesses and much sweat.  The occasional
shrill scream of terror broke through the sounds of industry as a giant alligator or
legendary Arvat supersized anaconda snatched an unsuspecting coolie from the marsh or
river area.  Yet, he would be quickly replaced by an alternate coolie, emboldened and
willing to accept the risk for the reward.  Giant mosquitoes buzzed about, some the
size of small birds.  The smoke provided temporary relief to the coolies, although a
mass fever of West Arvat Virus had already stricken many.  In all, the site emanated
     "It is pretty funny how they are building their own slums!" roared Trebonius the
     "This flood magic was well worth the coin we had to pay that conjurer.  The
damage caused to the coolie shanty towns was devastating." stated Darius the Great.
"You are indeed brilliant, sire!"
     "That flood washed away most of the shanty town, leaving a huge housing problem
in Arvat." mused Caesar.  "A perfect opportunity for us to buy up land on the cheap,
before real estate takes off."
     "The Dark One has come through on the million gold pieces.  The last shipment
arrived at our compound yesterday by armored rickshaw and under heavy guard." stated
     "The Arvat puppet government has agreed to our plan to buy, develop and lease
back the riverfront area." chuckled Darius.  "They are pleased that we will provide
much needed employment and also assist with the housing crisis."
     "And don't forget, Darius." smiled Caesar.  "With one million in new reserves,
Roman Pillars Bank & Trust can begin lending at breakneck pace.  Those all knowing
economists at the Arvat Central Bank have left rates very low and have agreed to
continue to do so.  In addition, the politicians are worried that raising rates may
shatter an already fragile economy.  They have chastised the banks for not making
more loans available to the poor so that everyone can achieve the Arvat dream of home
ownership.  Everything is coming together.  Stocks will rise and the bulls will
charge forward!"
     "My lord, I have instructed our mortgage bankers to ease lending standards and
make loans readily available to all." stated Darius.  "These coolies can now borrow
with no money down, using interest only and adjustable rate mortgages and at subprime
levels!  The price of real estate will skyrocket and we will fuel the buying with our
aggressive lending."
     "Everyone will owe us a mortgage and we will sell off all of that land we have
been quietly buying up on the cheap!" exclaimed Trebonius.  "Profits will soar and we
will fuel an economic boom that lines our pockets."
     "But what if these filthy coolies don't pay us back?" asked Darius, suddenly
apprehensive.  "The Dark One will want his cut....  Mad Max controls the building
inspectors....  There are many wheels to grease!"
     "Everyone will have money in their pockets since they will all be working, so
what does it matter?" stated Caesar.  "And once they build up equity in their homes,
we will provide them with the means to cash it out and borrow even more.  The Dark
One is aware and a willing partner on this historical endeavor."
     "Brilliant, sire!" shouted Darius.
     The three men stared out at the sprawling site.  Black smoke filled the air,
trees fell and the sounds of "heave, ho, heave, ho" could be heard everywhere as
coolies labored in the morning sun.  The construction of the Arvat Coolie Housing
Projects was underway, the Arvat Historical Society visited by Caesar's Thugs and
nothing remained to stand in the way of ushering in a new era of Arvat prosperity....

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                        ---===FREE BLADES REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 606): BLHU MURTHER of BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 608): CAELUM of FORCE OF FIVE (Doctor Doom, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 602): LYLYANNA of DARK CREATION (H.P.L. West, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 604): GOLD BULLION of GOLDEN GLADIATORS (Midas, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 603): YAREK ZURN of MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 601): BART SIMPSON of CUNNING RUNTS (Deep Thought, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 300): YAU (DARKFACE) of ZULU NATION (?, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 594): PLATINUM PEENER of METAL MINCERS (Oremaster, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 298): BEDLAM of CHAOS (Lord of Chaos, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 590): LUCRETIUS of ROMAN HEROES (Caesar, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 588): THE MONK of RAVAGING HORDES (General Ikillu, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 579): KNUCKLE of LOST CAUSE (Vol, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 542): HAWK NELSON of POSITIVE ALTERNATIVE (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 276): BOLI of OF WOLF & MAN (Tripwire, mgr.)
 DM  47 DOUBLE X (turn 270): SISTER MERCY of OLD HABITS (Soultaker, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 257): DOMJON of DRUID'S GROVE (Armalias, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 469): TWIG LITE ZONE of INCONSISTENT FURY (Banthius, mgr.)
 DM  60 COLLUSION COVE (turn 456): STITCHES of CHILDHOOD TRAUMA (Samwise the Bald)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 442): XAVAN YOLE of MIDDLE WAY 16 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  65 DAL SHANG (turn 433): ROPE MAN of MIGHTY HEROES (Hombre, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 205): SKIN PEELER of BLACKMAIL (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  74 DAYLA KIV (turn 401): GOOGLE of CORPS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 397): FOOTSTEPS of PARANOID ASYLUM (Jekyll, mgr.)
 DM  78 LIN TIRIAN (turn 379): SHANA TWO-KNIVES of SAND DANCERS (Jorja, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 495): GOLEM of THE PHILANTROPHISTS (Aragorn, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 606): BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 608): DREAMERS (Sleepy, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 602): GREENWARDENS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 604): PUNNY ANIMALS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 603): MIDDLE WAY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 601): CUNNING RUNTS (Deep Thought, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 300): THE ANIMALS (The Zoo Keeper, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 594): MID EARTH (Visionist, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 298): LORDS OF VALHALLA (High Lord Bosk, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 590): DEVIL ADVOCATES (Dark One, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 588): RAVAGING LORDS (General Ikillu, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 579): CHILDREN OF LLYR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 542): LUROICIAN ROYALTY (The Greek Guy, mgr.)
 DM  47 DOUBLE X (turn 270): DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 257): LIFE IMPACTS (Smitty, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 469): INCONSISTENT FURY (Banthius, mgr.)
 DM  60 COLLUSION COVE (turn 456): HIT ME WITH... (PTFT, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 442): MIDDLE WAY 16 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  65 DAL SHANG (turn 463): MIGHTY DUCKS (Woody, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 205): MONGOL HORDE (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  74 DAYLA KIV (turn 401): CORPS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 397): SAND DANCERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  78 LIN TIRIAN (turn 379): SAND DANCERS (Jorja, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 495): DO IT AGAIN et al (The Dark One, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 608): BIG SHRIMP of ICE AGE (Wali Kharif, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 604): GOLD BULLION of GOLDEN GLADIATORS (Midas, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 593): HULIK of MID EARTH (Visionist, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 276): AUNTY ENTITY of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
                               YUFFIE of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  47 DOUBLE X (turn 269): THE RON of WARHAMMERS (Coyote, mgr.)
                             FOLMOR GRIGG of THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 256): CANTEX of LIFE IMPACTS (Smitty, mgr.)
 DM  60 COLLUSION COVE (turn 456): STITCHES of CHILDHOOD TRAUMA (Samwise the Bald)
                                   FLICKED BOOGERS of HIT ME WITH... (PTFT, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 205): SKIN PEELER of BLACKMAIL (The Mun, mgr.)
                            HAWTHORN of BAD APPLES (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  75 JADE MOUNTAIN (turn 397): FOOTSTEPS of PARANOID ASYLUM (Jekyll, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Hail Warriors of the Top Ten!  Your Duelmaster bids you greetings!  It has been a
long time since a Roman has sat atop the heap here in Arvat and it is always a good
feeling....  We have certainly encountered our fair share of experienced fighters
being killed off, both here and abroad, over recent times.  Perhaps this unfortunate
streak is coming to an end.  Last turn, we bid farewell to Marcus (13-6-1), a
21-11-6-17-9-9-11 Lunger with -2 Init, +1 Riposte, +1 Attack and +2 Defense.
NORM/GOOD with Experts in Initiative, Riposte, Attack and Defense.  R.I.P.

Congratulations to Angels of Pain on their 4-1-3 last turn!  Tremendous!!!  Also,
thanks to Undead Duck for extending a title shot to me!  It is much appreciated and I
hope it helps propel me to Free Blades very, very soon.  I see the tourney results
were posted on the coliseum billboard.  Congratulations to Madness on his victory and
also to Ted D. Seaver on a decent showing.

As you may have noticed, we Romans are scaling down operations here in Arvat for the
time being.  Until some new teams show up, there is not much point in randoming up
against our allies each and every turn....

Now what do we do about this War Eagle scoundrel?  Send me in?  The Duelmaster takes
the Bloodfeud into his own hands?  An Arvat Bloodfeud of the Ages???  Duelmaster
versus Mad Max nightmare warrior???  Or perhaps my head on a silver platter?!?  Do we
send in Lucius?  Perhaps he might be able to accomplish the mission....  He plucked
the Eagle's feathers in one minute back on Turn 583, only to lose to him the
following three turns straight.  So perhaps not a good choice after all....  Or do I
go with the safe ploy and call in the Fighting Artemidorii?  Artie Iv lost to him
back on Turn 578 in five brutal minutes, but went on to beat him in three minutes on
Turn 588, only to lose to him again on Turn 589, also in three minutes.  Artie V, who
once went 91 minutes in a tourney (yes, we got a little carried away and ran him in a
tourney!) might be tasked with the job as the "unknown quantity."  Both he and I (me)
have never faced the Eagle.  Or do we simply let 'ol Marcus go unavenged?  Can't do
that because we also need to knock the Eagle down a few pegs since he has more
recognition points than I do!  Can't have some upstart challenger Eagle with more
points than the Duelmaster!  Points he received as a result of the loss of our
teammate!!!  Decisions, decisions....  And you thought it was easy being

If the Bloodfeud does not happen, that leaves Dee T. Emeter, Mountain General and
Easter Guardian.  Dee polished me off in two minutes in a random on Turn 583 and has
been crushing the Fighting Artemidorii at will (and like beer cans), so he gets
avoided.  I did narrowly defeat Easter Guardian back on Turn 585 in three bloody
minutes, but that fight could have gone either way, although on Turn 588, I did make
swift work of him.  I've never faced Mountain General before and wouldn't mind a TP
"Scumdown of the Ages and Bloodfeud Barbeque Chicken Beerfest."  So perhaps that is
the best way to go?  The General can go the distance, as was the case versus Artie IV
on Turn 587 when he scummed his way to victory in 21 long, long, long minutes....  If
no Bloodfeud, I hope we match up and Dee gets Convicted Assassin or Venomous
Concubine.  I've always entertained the thought of a concubine, but perhaps without
the venom....  Could we substitute vodka instead?

Anyway, not much arena activity these days.  We applaud the arrival of Wax Hostile as
some new blood (no pun intended) for Arvat.  We are sort of sorry to see your team
lose three guys last turn.  Good luck on your three replacements!  Ours was yet
another dud....  And what happened to Team Symbi?  They really fizzled quick.  Too
bad....  Welcome also to Christian Rock managed by the legendary Zalgor Prigg!  We
are certain you will make a fine addition to this ancient and time honored arena!

No parry lungers or parry strikes here and only one waste and ripper.
Interesting....  Everyone else is a frustrated offensive fighting the number one
ranked style (yes, scum always rises to the top!) and the most successful over the
past ten turns by four percentage points at 45-36-1.  Strikers come in second with a
narrow break even margin at 23-22-3.  Aimers break even at 17-17-1 and everyone else
is below the dreaded fifty percent mark....

That's a wrap for this turn!  A brick in the face to the Eagle!  The Eagle has
Landed?  Or has he???  The Arvat hands of time tick away at all of us....

May Caesar's putter always ring true and his driver strike biblical distances!

Hail Arvat!  I Remain...

Lucretius (32-4687)
Duelmaster and Bloodfeud Champion
Roman Heroes (73)

                                      SPY REPORT

     If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of 
ARVAT brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too.  Later days, DEVIL ADVOCATES, since 
SARATOGA GLORY took top team from you this turn, you guys are old news.  SARATOGA 
GLORY turned their 4-1-0 turn into a 1st place rank in the listings this turn.  Any 
better than this, and you get put on hit lists.  Gee, I'm impressed, a 3-1-1 is nice, 
but don't get cocky, ANGELS OF PAIN, the Fates teach humility, and the Fates are 
proud.  Of course, we're all terribly impressed to see MYSTIC MIRAGE win a fight and 
gain 19 points, terribly.  Tsk, tsk, MYSTIC MIRAGE beat DEE T. EMTER and DEE T. EMTER 
lost 15 points.  You're breakin' my heart.  Looks like ARVAT has some guts at least, 
LUCRETIUS the Duelmaster was this turn's most-challenged warrior.  LUCRETIUS 
Bloodfeuded WAR EAGLE for ARVAT's Title this turn, and guess what happened?  And it's 
out with the old, in with the new, as WAR EAGLE takes the Title and last week's bar 
tab from the old Duelmaster.  Heh, heh.  I'm not in a very good mood today, but why 
am I telling you this?  You want to know what's new, don't you, ARVAT?   
     Well, let's take a look at some more misdeeds of you miserable sword-boys.  
ROMAN HEROES, I suppose you'll be glad to know you were this turn's most avoided 
team.  Care to know who is the most afraid of you?  And it looks like SARATOGA GLORY 
avoided them the most this turn.  What a pack of would be losers, if you ask me.  
Hmph.  And we have MOUNTAIN GENERAL in a challenge, going down 15 points for the 
fight.  Guess what?  I thought MOUNTAIN GENERAL showed great skill and promise when 
he overcame SNOWFLAKE.  All right, so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     Ah, now we come to my favorite part, where we see all the guys who are dead and 
gone, and get to see if their team cared.  We're all going to die in the end, so why 
worry if the fate catches up with you sooner that later?   
     There's got to be a better place in ARVAT to get a drink than The Swinging 
Aardvark!  Any suggestions?  Phlllt!  Just had to do that before I leave the fine 
city of ARVAT.  I feel much better now.  Glad to see the back of this place-- Snide 

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WAR EAGLE 4767               14   6  1   143       SARATOGA GLORY (352)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 EASTER GUARDIAN 4706         11   6  1   118       SARATOGA GLORY (352)
 MYSTIC MIRAGE 4635           15  11  1   107       SARATOGA GLORY (352)
 UNDEAD DUCK 4612              8   3  0    99       BARN OF HORRORS (358)
 MOUNTAIN GENERAL 4634        23   4  1    96       SARATOGA GLORY (352)
 ARTEMIDORUS IV 4663          18   7  2    92       ROMAN HEROES (73)
 LUCRETIUS 4687               16   8  2    92       ROMAN HEROES (73)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SNOWFLAKE 4689               15  15  1    84       RILL'S GCSC2 (370)
 DEE T. EMTER 4860            10   7  0    84       DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)
 LUCIUS 4620                  17  12  0    68       ROMAN HEROES (73)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ARTEMIDORUS V 4686           18   5  0    64       ROMAN HEROES (73)
 AWE 4861                      7  10  1    64       ANGELS OF PAIN (360)
 ESTHER ROTHE 4962             5   3  0    57       DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LOU C. FIRR 4853              9  11  0    56       DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)
 MADNESS 4980                  4   0  1    46       ANGELS OF PAIN (360)
 PANIC 4947                    4   0  1    46       ANGELS OF PAIN (360)
 THE SCOUSER 4858              9   8  0    41       SARATOGA GLORY (352)
 EAST TO WEST 4929             3   2  0    35       CHRISTIAN ROCK (415)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BRAVE DAVE 4964               4   2  0    29       WAX HOSTILE (399)
 S. MOE DEUS 4999              2   0  0    29       DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-AGONY 4944                    2   1  1    22       ANGELS OF PAIN (360)
 MAD COW 4976                  3   1  0    15       BARN OF HORRORS (358)
 BUSY LIZ 4982                 1   3  0     9       WAX HOSTILE (399)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
FRATSFA SLAVE           0  0 0                      MADNESS 4980          591  NONE
STUPIDITY 5004          0  1 0 ANGELS OF PAIN 360   BANDIT PRINCE         591  NONE
DA MEAT 1 5000          1  1 1 BARN OF HORRORS 358  DARK CHAMPION         591  NONE
DR CHICKEN 5005         0  1 0 BARN OF HORRORS 358  MOUNTAIN TROLL        591  NONE
DR GOAT 5006            0  1 0 BARN OF HORRORS 358  SHEWISH GIANT         591  NONE
N.Q. BUSS 4946          4  5 0 DEVIL ADVOCATES 105  SPYMASTER             591  NONE
BELLIGERENT COOL 5007   0  1 0 ROMAN HEROES 73      SPYMASTER             591  NONE
MARCUS 4850            13  6 1 ROMAN HEROES 73      WAR EAGLE 4767        590   
BAAAD BOB 4681          7  7 0 WAX HOSTILE 399      EASTER GUARDIAN 4706  590   
BOLD N COLD 4981        0  3 0 WAX HOSTILE 399      AGONY 4944            590   
MR JUNK I 5010          0  1 0 WAX HOSTILE 399      ARENAMISTRESS SU      591  NONE
MR JUNK II 5009         0  1 0 WAX HOSTILE 399      BANDIT PRINCE         591  NONE
MR JUNKY ENOUGH 5008    0  1 0 WAX HOSTILE 399      BANDIT PRINCE         591  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

All -- And that's the last of the Bobs.  I remember their creation like it was
yesterday...I was traversing my garden path, in search of Flora and fauna (Flora's my
cook don't you know) well I must have been dri...uh, thinking...because next thing I
knew I found myself face-first on terra firma.  Which was not unusual in itself, but
gave me pause to consider that new horrible roll-up sheet I'd recently received.  I'd
make them an all female squad named Bob.  (WC) -- Scion, mgr. Wax Hostile

Wax Hostile -- Sorry about the loss of Bold N Cold.  It was certainly unintentional.
Unfortunately I'm now at 4FE and being held for the FTF, so there will be no chance
to let you bloodfeud. -- Agony

Lucretius -- I am coming! -- Dee T. Emter

NQ Buss -- Enough of your losing and poor learning!  Dark Arena! -- Your Teammates

RUMOR OF THE WEEK:  Apparently a new coolie leader has arisen and is talking sedition
and rebellion.  This "Spartacus" seems to be driving his fellow to attack the
establishment and create a new coolie government!  Beware!

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DA MEAT 1 was butchered by DARK CHAMPION in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
N.Q. BUSS was butchered by SPYMASTER in a exciting 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
MR JUNK II was easily killed by BANDIT PRINCE in a 1 minute Dark Arena match.
MR JUNKY ENOUGH was assassinated by BANDIT PRINCE in a 2 minute Dark Arena duel.
BELLIGERENT COOLIE was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena contest.
STUPIDITY was savagely slain by BANDIT PRINCE in a 2 minute brutal Dark Arena fight.
MR JUNK I was butchered by ARENAMISTRESS SUGAR in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
DR GOAT was dispatched by SHEWISH GIANT in a 2 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
DR CHICKEN was executed by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
LUCRETIUS was handily defeated by WAR EAGLE in a 1 minute Bloodfeud Title melee.
MOUNTAIN GENERAL outwaited SNOWFLAKE in a 10 minute gruesome veteran's Challenge duel.
BRAVE DAVE won victory over MAD COW in a popular 2 minute Challenge fight.
S. MOE DEUS overpowered BUSY LIZ in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
ARTEMIDORUS IV was savagely defeated by EASTER GUARDIAN in a 2 minute veteran's match.
DEE T. EMTER was devastated by MYSTIC MIRAGE in a 1 minute one-sided battle.
UNDEAD DUCK devastated LUCIUS in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
AWE handily defeated EAST TO WEST in a 1 minute uneven fight.
ARTEMIDORUS V luckily beat LOU C. FIRR in a action packed 4 minute expert's struggle.
THE SCOUSER was bested by PANIC in a 2 minute master vs. novice upset brawl.
ESTHER ROTHE overpowered AMBITIOUS GUARD in a exciting 1 minute one-sided match.
MADNESS executed FRATSFA SLAVE in a 1 minute mismatched fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|TOTAL PARRY                      8         STRIKING ATTACK   25 -  19 -  3      57  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  7         TOTAL PARRY       44 -  40 -  1      52  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         LUNGING ATTACK    47 -  52 -  4      47  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  4         SLASHING ATTACK   26 -  29 -  0      47  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         AIMED BLOW        16 -  18 -  1      47  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    3         BASHING ATTACK     7 -   9 -  1      44  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         WALL OF STEEL      4 -  15 -  1      21  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   2 -  0       0  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   6 -  0       0  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-LUNGE        0 -   3 -  0       0  |

Turn 591 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

BASHING ATTACK     1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         1 -  2         5  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  2     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  3         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  3     TOTAL PARRY        2 -  6         2  STRIKING ATTACK
                              PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                              PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         1  AIMED BLOW     
                              PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0     
                              WALL OF STEEL      0 -  3     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   WAR EAGLE 4767             14   6  1  143 SARATOGA GLORY (352)
TOTAL PARRY      MOUNTAIN GENERAL 4634      23   4  1   96 SARATOGA GLORY (352)
SLASHING ATTACK  DEE T. EMTER 4860          10   7  0   84 DEVIL ADVOCATES (105)
AIMED BLOW       LUCIUS 4620                17  12  0   68 ROMAN HEROES (73)
BASHING ATTACK   MADNESS 4980                4   0  1   46 ANGELS OF PAIN (360)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is EASTER GUARDIAN 4706.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was LOU C. FIRR 4853.  The ten other most popular fighters were BRAVE DAVE 4964, 

The least popular fighter this week was THE SCOUSER 4858.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were EAST TO WEST 4929, LUCIUS 4620, DEE T. EMTER 4860, BUSY LIZ 
COOLIE 5007, and MR JUNKY ENOUGH 5008.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:


                        WINTER FACE-TO-FACE IN SUNNY ARIZONA!

Our next Winter FTF will be held in Tempe, Arizona, January 16-18, 2009.  It will be 
held at the Fiesta Resort in Tempe, AZ at 2100 South Priest Drive, Tempe, 85282
(480-967-1441).  Rooms are only $139.00 per night, 1-2 occupancy.  There is a free 
24-hour shuttle from the airport, free parking, free high-speed wireless internet
in all guest rooms.  There is a fitness center with cardiovascular and weight-lifting 
equipment, a heated swimming pool and jacuzzi, with poolside beverage delivery.  They 
have a bustling happy hour in the Kachina lounge, with complimentary hors d'oeuvres.
There are tons of restaurants nearby at the Mall, a Denny's across the street, and 
several fast food options nearby as well, as well as a restaurant in the hotel with 
room service.  

If you arrive early or stay late, don't forget that there is excellent golfing in 
the Phoenix area, with several championship courses nearby.  Winter is an excellent 
time to explore Arizona with a trip to the Grand Canyon or Sedona or any of our 
other scenic sites across the state.  

Hotel info:  http://www.fiestainnresort.com

The rooms are blocked--ask for the "Reality Simulations" room block.  

The tournament information sheet will be out imminently.  We hope you're all looking 
forward to the tournament and that we will see you there!