DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER
Date : 03/04/2004 Duedate: 03/17/2004
JHANS ARENA
DM-36 TURN-452
This Weeks Top Honors
THE DUELMASTER IS
HALO 14
BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
(36-5711) [12-9-1,93]
Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader
HALO 14 OBLIVIOUS
BLIND HYPOCRISY (504) KAMIKAZI (533)
(36-5711) [12-9-1,93] (36-6101) [4-0-0,43]
Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite
KERRY BEAR KERRY BEAR
BLITZKRIEG (271) BLITZKRIEG (271)
(36-3994) [8-6-0,55] (36-3994) [8-6-0,55]
THE CURRENT TOP TEAM
KAMIKAZI (533)
TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team
1. STDS (534) 44
2. THE FALLEN (524) 40 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
3. SHADOW SOLDIERS (530) 36 Unchartered Team
4. VAGRANT REGIME (539) 32
5. LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (515) 26 THE CRIMSON TIDE (426)
The Top Teams
Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K
1- 1*SUPERIOR HORDE 196 (528) 1 0 0 100 1/ 4*KAMIKAZI (533) 10 4 0
2/ 0*THE CRIMSON TIDE (426) 3 1 1 75.0 2/ 1 BLITZKRIEG (271) 10 5 1
3/ 0*VAGRANT REGIME (539) 3 2 0 60.0 3/ 3 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525) 9 6 3
4/ 2 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504) 43 30 5 58.9 4/ 6 THE FALLEN (524) 8 7 0
5- 4*THE BREW CREW (526) 8 7 0 53.3 5- 7 ANARKYSTS (341) 6 4 0
6/ 5 BABES (416) 204 183 6 52.7 6/10 BABES (416) 6 5 0
7/ 6 BLITZKRIEG (271) 131 123 13 51.6 7/12 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504) 6 7 0
8/ 7 HELTER SKELTER (256) 493 471 29 51.1 8/ 2 SECTION HATE (491) 6 9 1
9/ 8 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525) 25 25 4 50.0 9/ 9*SHADOW SOLDIERS (530) 5 10 0
10/14*KAMIKAZI (533) 12 12 1 50.0 10/13 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE. (515) 4 7 1
11/11*THE MATRIX (531) 6 6 0 50.0 11/ 0*THE CRIMSON TIDE (426) 3 1 1
12/ 9 THE FALLEN (524) 24 26 1 48.0 12/ 0*VAGRANT REGIME (539) 3 2 0
13-10 ANARKYSTS (341) 301 353 33 46.0 13-11*THE BREW CREW (526) 3 2 0
14-12 IRON TIGERS (484) 107 129 16 45.3 14- 5 IRON TIGERS (484) 3 3 1
15/15 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE. (515) 51 65 8 44.0 15/18 HELTER SKELTER (256) 2 1 0
16/ 3*STDS (534) 5 7 1 41.7 16/16*THE MATRIX (531) 2 1 0
17/13*THE DREAMING (529) 10 15 1 40.0 17-14*ABYSMAL BEHAVIORS (538) 2 3 1
18-16*ABYSMAL BEHAVIORS (538) 2 3 1 40.0 18/15*STDS (534) 2 7 1
Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K
19/17 SECTION HATE (491) 86 138 12 38.4 19/ 8*THE DREAMING (529) 2 8 0
20/18*SHADOW SOLDIERS (530) 7 13 0 35.0 20-17*SUPERIOR HORDE 196 (528) 1 0 0
21-19*SHATTERED DREAMS (527) 5 20 2 20.0 21-19*SHATTERED DREAMS (527) 0 5 0
'*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn
(###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank
TEAM SPOTLIGHT
+ ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Out of the Past #3 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +
Valamantis:
Hallie O'Dene did not stay in Valamantis. She hadn't been able to get an
audience with the ruler of the city-state, Garlor Shanmarrik, and the clerk to whom
she had given her warning had been...disbelieving. Had, in fact, threatened her with
imprisonment if she "stirred up unrest." A very proper bureaucrat, he'd been.
Hallie considered slicing off his ears and nailing them to the wall, or possibly
nailing the man's ears to the wall without slicing them off, but such action would
serve no purpose but to express her anger, so she didn't. There really wasn't any
point in that. She gave her warning to Arenamistress Sitalva, who was at least
polite, and then went on her way. Carefully circling wide around the ruins of Old
Valamantis and ghosts of the ancient city that came and went unstably above them.
The people of Valamantis, in the person of the Lord's clerk, had chosen to ignore her
warning, and there were others she had to find and warn, others who might listen.
Arenamistress Sitalva did not exactly believe Hallie's warning about the danger
from the Bloodgames, but she didn't disbelieve, either. She had already seen the
mirage-like ancient towers above the bloody ground. She had seen those ghostly
towers before, after other Bloodgames, had accepted them as a normal illusion there.
Maybe she needed to re-think "normal."
She couldn't imagine anyone resurrecting Old Valamantis for any kind of GOOD
reason.
The oldest levels of the city were Folstrom.
And saturated with dark magic.
Mordant:
Mordant was like a stirred up hive of bees, full of activity, and hostile to any
stranger who had the misfortune to get in the way. She guessed that she wouldn't
have any more luck getting in to see Queen Talissen of Mordant than she had in
Valamantis. Which was frustrating, since it was a serious warning she had to
deliver. Well, she hadn't expected this to be easy....
After a moment's thought, she headed straight for the arena, bypassing the
palace entirely. There would be people who'd listen to her at the arena, because she
was one of them. Kakar was arenamaster in Mordant, she'd met him once. A grim man,
but who wouldn't be if they had to live in Mordant? She avoided looking at the
pitted black stone that most of the city was built of, and the windowless
architecture. The Mordanti were a grim people all around.
The arena was seething with activity and speculation, though it wasn't fight
day. Rumors were flying; before she managed to locate the arenamaster, Hallie heard
seven different versions of "an attack on the Queen!" which had been foiled by a
gladiator, or maybe more than one gladiator, or maybe it had been made by a
gladiator, or only reported by a gladiator, or.... The attack on the Queen, if it
had happened at all, was the main topic, but there was a froth of other rumors in the
background: monsters in various likely or unlikely places, out in the swamp, down in
Valamantis, in the Syrinwald lake, or up in the mountains. A war that might or might
not be happening between two different kingdoms in the south, and even the supposed
participants kept changing--Trocar, Rocanis, Xochithlan, the wild Rirorni. Banditry
around Tricorus; she shrugged that one off. There was always banditry around
Tricorus.
Arenamaster Kakar was closeted with a sober looking man, tall for a Kannar, and
richly dressed. Kakar didn't actually refuse to listen to Hallie, but he made it
clear that he didn't have much time to spare.
Hallie shrugged. The way things had been going since she'd set out to spread
the warning, his attitude was no surprise. She wondered in passing whether Khaldren
could have managed some kind of spell that made people unwilling to listen. Not that
it mattered at the moment. "I bring word of a powerful wizard who has come out of
the past to spread disaster in our time," she began. "He is a wizard from drowned
Krael, and he claims the intention to resurrect Celestinvael and other lost cities
and build a new empire in Alastari."
The tall man leaned forward, suddenly frowning. "Celestinvael is five hundred
years dead," he stated. "How can this be 'resurrected'?" Celestinvael was also,
Hallie knew, the closest of the dangerous ruins to Mordant, unless you counted Old
Valamantis--which Khaldren hadn't mentioned.
"I'm no wizard," she answered. "I don't know. But he stated his intention to
use 'blood magic' to do it, which he believes will work even with the Arcanum in
flux." She shrugged. "I don't know about magic, but he seemed confidant, and I saw
him work spells of great power."
"No doubt we've mages around who can confirm or deny this possibility," the tall
man said. "I will carry the warning to Queen Talissen and set our magicians to
work." Seeing her surprise, he added, "I am Allech Rabo, Her Majesty's Herald. I
have the authority to take these steps."
"Good! You might pass word to Valamantis, too--I couldn't get to see anyone but
a damned clerk. If it's blood magic at work, well, there was a lot of blood spilled
in Old Valamantis just over a month ago--"
"Mordan!" The Herald leaped to his feet. "The Bloodgames! If blood magic
still works, then the danger is extreme! I must go to the Queen at once!"
"And I will speak to the gladiators of this city about the dangers ahead," Kakar
said when the Herald had gone. "Doubtless they will be called upon to take arms
against enemies of Mordant."
Iaye:
The first ground tremors made people uneasy, but no more than that. There had
been small earthquakes for months now, mostly centered on Seam and its underground
disturbances. They posed no threat to the island, except in the case of those boats
who were just coming into the docks when tremor-waves hit. And even that...the
sailors of Iaye were skilled, and they had learned to deal with it.
But the mild tremors didn't stop, they were replaced by serious jolts, and the
ground underfoot shivered like jelly in a bowl. All the sailors who could took their
ships out of the harbor and around the island toward the center of the Trier. No one
wanted to get caught by a bigger wave than usual and shoved onto a rocky shore.
Once the ships were safely away from the land, alarm turned to eager
speculation. Did this herald new geysers for Seam? Would a volcano erupt and
destroy the town entirely? Bets were placed. After all, Seam wasn't THEIR town....
Or maybe this quake would strike a little closer to home, like the one that had
cracked open the Ogre's Tomb in Point. That thought sobered people. There had
been...things in the Tomb, and it had taken all the warriors who could reach Point to
deal with them. What else might be down there, to be released by a fresh earthquake?
They didn't really want to know.
Most of the ships were strung out parallel to the coast north of Point and Iaye.
Far enough apart not to damage each other if something went wrong, close enough to
pass messages along. The message that came up from the southern end of the line near
sunset was unexpected, and more than a little alarming. Everyone knew there were
ruins under the lake between Point and the island of Iaye. But nobody had expected
them to rise.
And none of the half-remembered stories of Krael made people happy about the
great city's reappearance.
SPY REPORT
Oh, hi. Its just little 'ol Debby Tonte. Thought I'd check out JHANS to see
what's new. Too bad, BLITZKRIEG, but KAMIKAZI was just too good to be stopped. See
if I even talk to any of those losers in THE DREAMING again! Didja see where they
got 1-4-0? Somebody musta won a lotta fights! BLIND HYPOCRISY like really fought
hard to move up to 7th from 12th. Way to go! Cut this out and put it in your
scrapbooks, KAMIKAZI! 'Cause they got 3-1-0 and moved up to 1st! I talked to THE
CRIMSON TIDE's manager before the fights. He said, "We're gonna do good." And look
at this: 3-1-1! Psychic, or what! MVP award for DEVASTATOR? THE FALLEN's proud of
him after beating BROWN KITTY TOO and getting 14 points. Talk about yer major
upsets! ARACHNE's match with DONNA cost him a loss of 10 points! And I was just
getting used to the ex-Duelmaster's habit of...(!) Oh well, welcome HALO 14. Aren't
BLIND HYPOCRISY proud. (Oh, my.) I hear the top team insists all their warriors get
nine hours sleep. They want photogenic fighters for PR photos.
I gotta admit I haven't been in "deep con caves" with any spies. Really, I just
wing this stuff. The warriors of SECTION HATE must be getting lonely. They were the
most avoided team. Do you guys know something that I don't? Is there some deep dark
secret why THE DREAMING's been avoiding SECTION HATE so much? Or is it just that
they're too scared? Can LITTLE GIRLS LIKE...'s ANOTHER BLANKEE be more popular than
me? She was challenged the most, but is that really the same? CONFESSION is being
unfair. He's challenged down 28 against SYPHILIS. I don't know why they let this
stuff go on. (I'd better shut up) Is this how BLIND HYPOCRISY advances, by having
their members (CONFESSION) fight people that are really below them (SYPHILIS)? See
if I ever talk to CORINTHIAN again! DEL MONTE was so low when He challenged he.
Hhmph! DEL MONTE is a real man! He was challenged by CORINTHIAN, 21 points above,
and BEAT him! Dark Arena, anyone? Some fights are really unfair. How do you think
ANOTHER BLANKEE feels about being challenged by SUBZERO, 25 points above her?
SUBZERO beat ANOTHER BLANKEE. No surprise about that. Really I'm not surprised
SUBZERO would do such a scummy thing, either.
Man, all these warriors dying and killing each other! Don't you guys ever give
it a break? Like, who is this gal??? BIG BED gets sent to the Dark Arena, battles
SUPERIOR MANAGER, and returns to tell of it!!! I bet LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... manager is
surprised! Pinch me, I must be dreaming!!! 'E' COLE I returns from the Dark Arena,
maybe a "little upset" at its STDS teammates... That was so totally rude when
BIBIDY-BOBIDY-BOO wasted RAIMONDO. I think all you warriors in JHANS should gang up
on SUICIDAL DREAMS! FRANCOIS bloodfeuded (is that a word?) STRIKER for revenge over
some guy's bad fortune. Was it really worth it? What if they had a fight and nobody
showed up? I'd be out of a job, that's what!!!
I really didn't, you know, study when I was a kid. Who would've guessed I'd be
a famous Spyreporter? I gotta leave. JHANS is like such a dump, and you guys smell
too much! Remember you guys, ease up sometimes! Chill out! Later, Debby Tonte
DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
HALO 14 5711 12 9 1 93 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
-POSTMASTER P 5182 20 11 0 133 HELTER SKELTER (256)
CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
PINK BEAR 5883 16 8 1 83 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (515)
KATHLEEN 5865 16 9 0 78 BABES (416)
MAC 3965 8 9 2 73 BLITZKRIEG (271)
CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
SKIRZA SLAPSTIK 5996 8 2 0 63 THE FALLEN (524)
ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
KERRY BEAR 3994 8 6 0 55 BLITZKRIEG (271)
DONNA 5966 6 5 0 54 BABES (416)
UNION JACK 6015 9 0 0 51 BLITZKRIEG (271)
RAVAGE 5993 7 3 0 47 THE FALLEN (524)
OBLIVIOUS 6101 4 0 0 43 KAMIKAZI (533)
MARCIE 6076 3 2 0 42 BABES (416)
-MAZRIM 5911 6 1 0 38 IRON TIGERS (484)
DRIPS 6066 4 2 0 38 STDS (534)
ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
BRICKHOUSE 5960 8 1 0 35 SECTION HATE (491)
CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
TROJAN MAN 5710 7 4 2 33 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
'E' COLE I 6065 1 0 1 33 STDS (534)
BIG BED 6088 1 3 1 33 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (515)
BIBIDY-BOBIDY-BOO 6085 4 1 2 32 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
CONFESSION 6003 4 1 0 32 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
HUGGY BEAR 6002 6 4 0 31 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
-SLAYIN STAYNER 5891 4 0 0 31 ANARKYSTS (341)
ARACHNE 5712 3 1 0 31 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
FRANCOIS 6038 3 1 0 30 SHADOW SOLDIERS (530)
SUBZERO 6120 3 0 0 28 KAMIKAZI (533)
TIKI BOB 6004 8 3 0 27 BLITZKRIEG (271)
CLURACAN 6035 4 1 0 26 THE DREAMING (529)
-SLASHIN' SPECK 5854 5 9 1 25 ANARKYSTS (341)
-KILL'EM KREPP 5892 4 0 0 25 ANARKYSTS (341)
DEL MONTE 6115 2 1 0 25 SHADOW SOLDIERS (530)
TANTRIC 6036 4 4 1 24 BLITZKRIEG (271)
-KANE 6020 3 0 0 24 THE BREW CREW (526)
INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
MR. ANDERSON 6043 3 2 0 22 THE MATRIX (531)
DEVASTATOR 6079 2 4 0 22 THE FALLEN (524)
SHADOW STARR 5999 5 5 1 21 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
BADDA BAMM 6075 3 3 0 21 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
JEALOUSY RAINS 5995 3 7 1 20 THE FALLEN (524)
SHAWNDA 6032 3 2 0 19 THE DREAMING (529)
FROSTY MCCLOUD 6086 2 3 0 18 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
CLUTCH SHUTTLE 6060 3 1 0 17 HELTER SKELTER (256)
-PIGFEED PICKTAN 6124 2 0 0 17 ANARKYSTS (341)
BADDA BANG 6013 2 7 0 16 THE FALLEN (524)
-BASHFUL COMPLEX 6113 1 0 0 15 ABYSMAL BEHAVIORS (538)
-BLUEBEARD 6029 1 0 0 13 SUPERIOR HORDE 196L (528)
DRIVER 6055 3 2 1 12 KAMIKAZI (533)
-DEWCLAW 6100 1 0 0 12 IRON TIGERS (484)
-FRANKENSLOSH 5901 3 1 0 11 HELTER SKELTER (256)
-THE ONE 6046 2 0 0 11 THE MATRIX (531)
-ENVIOUS KING 6109 1 0 1 11 ABYSMAL BEHAVIORS (538)
-PSYCHO 6017 1 2 0 11 THE BREW CREW (526)
LEOTSU 4655 1 0 0 11 THE CRIMSON TIDE (426)
CORINTHIAN 6034 2 3 1 10 THE DREAMING (529)
HOPE DESTRUCTOR 6131 1 0 0 10 VAGRANT REGIME (539)
BRAIN COLLECTOR 6134 1 0 0 10 VAGRANT REGIME (539)
DUSTY CHERUB 6135 1 0 0 10 VAGRANT REGIME (539)
STRIKER 6093 2 2 1 9 SECTION HATE (491)
-KRAZY KLOWN 6023 2 3 0 9 SHATTERED DREAMS (527)
SCORPINE 6119 2 1 0 9 KAMIKAZI (533)
-NIGHTWING 6092 1 0 0 9 THE BREW CREW (526)
MOGASH 6037 2 2 0 8 SHADOW SOLDIERS (530)
DEFIANCE 6122 1 2 0 8 SECTION HATE (491)
-AGENT SMITH 6042 1 1 0 8 THE MATRIX (531)
-LUCIFERI 6018 2 1 0 7 THE BREW CREW (526)
-BUDDHA/NEW 6058 1 3 1 7 SHATTERED DREAMS (527)
JACK RIPPER 4651 1 0 1 7 THE CRIMSON TIDE (426)
-LIL' DEAD GIRL 6081 1 2 0 6 SHATTERED DREAMS (527)
CAIN 6073 1 3 0 6 THE DREAMING (529)
LUCA 4653 1 0 0 5 THE CRIMSON TIDE (426)
-DARK ANGEL 6025 0 5 0 5 SHATTERED DREAMS (527)
-WASTEM WUORNOS 6123 0 2 0 5 ANARKYSTS (341)
BROWN KITTY TOO 6118 1 1 0 4 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (515)
-DYNIT 6083 1 1 0 4 IRON TIGERS (484)
-DEATH STRYKE 6019 0 3 0 3 THE BREW CREW (526)
INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME
-BADDA BLING 6080 0 3 0 3 SHATTERED DREAMS (527)
ANOTHER BLANKEE 6117 0 2 0 3 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (515)
CHIEF BLING-BLING$ 6091 0 3 0 3 THE DREAMING (529)
SYPHILIS 6129 0 2 0 2 STDS (534)
WRETCHED WIGHT 6132 0 1 0 1 VAGRANT REGIME (539)
-PROMISCUOUS QUEEN 6112 0 1 0 1 ABYSMAL BEHAVIORS (538)
KILROY WUZ HERE 6139 0 1 0 1 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
-POLITE BEGGAR 6111 0 1 0 1 ABYSMAL BEHAVIORS (538)
CRACKED DOLL 6133 0 1 0 1 VAGRANT REGIME (539)
CAVEMAN 4652 0 1 0 1 THE CRIMSON TIDE (426)
'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.
THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge?
HELENA 6128 0 1 0 BABES 416 HIGH ELF 19 452 NONE
SUPERIOR MANAGER 22 0 1 0 DARK ARENA 0 BIG BED 6088 452 NONE
RILLION 21 0 1 0 DARK ARENA 0 'E' COLE I 6065 452 NONE
CHAOS TUESDAY 6121 0 1 0 HELTER SKELTER 256 BLACK ORC 20 452 NONE
STARK 5905 6 7 1 IRON TIGERS 484 MAC 3965 450 REVENGED
SILVER KITTY 6116 0 1 0 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE 515 ENVIOUS KING 6109 451
NEO 6045 0 1 0 THE MATRIX 531 DRIVER 6055 448 NOT REVE
HATRED 5938 4 6 1 SECTION HATE 491 RILLION 21 452 NONE
ERRUPTION 6094 0 4 0 SECTION HATE 491 SHADOW STARR 5999 452
RAIMONDO 6114 0 3 0 SHADOW SOLDIERS 530 BIBIDY-BOBIDY-BO 6085 452
PHOENIX 6138 0 1 0 SHADOW SOLDIERS 530 JACK RIPPER 4651 452
PAPI 6039 0 1 0 SHADOW SOLDIERS 530 STRIKER 6093 449 JUST REV
MAREK 6041 0 3 0 SHADOW SOLDIERS 530 BIBIDY-BOBIDY-BO 6085 451
DARK WONDER 6062 0 1 0 STDS 534 BLACK ORC 20 452 NONE
DARK FINK 6064 0 1 0 STDS 534 BANDIT PRINCE 25 452 NONE
PERSONAL ADS
Bookie -- You just don't matter enough for me to pay attention to your team name. I
also thought rather than ASS-U-ME, I would show you the courtesy of asking your team
name. Finally, as I mentioned in Osksi, I'll leave it to you to name call as you
have nothing intelligent to offer. -- Shocking Toad
Kathleen -- Well fought. Kayla's sad but it was a great fight. -- Pink Bear
Drips -- My Mother and Grandmother do frequent the streets and back alleys of Jhans.
They, and other members of their church, often try to provide food and counseling to
the scum and trash who live (and in your family's case work) in the streets. --
Polarius (smile)
Drips -- Hey, I just had a thought. If Bookie were elected Mayor of Jhans he would
probably raise all of our taxes and provide services to your mother, grandmother, and
sister who work the streets of Jhans. Don't worry though, I'm sure he wouldn't make
them prove they are trying to find respectable work to continue receiving benefits.
In fact, they would be able to retire from their work in the streets. No more back
and knee scratches/injuries. -- Polarius
Jhans -- I see that Superior Manager was killed last turn. No big loss. He was a
whining Andorian anyway. -- Polarius
Silver Stroke -- Welcome to Jhans. Which alliance's banner do you fight under? --
Polarius
Bookie -- Adam Sandler playing LaMa$e??? I was thinking more like Don Knotts! --
Polarius
Targen -- Congrats. I must say I enjoyed our fight. You have honorably avenged your
teammate's death and graduated like a true champion. -- MAC
P.S. Of course I'd love a rematch but I guess that will have to wait!
Corinthian -- Sorry man, bad match up. -- Kerry Bear
Confession -- I must confess...I almost broke a sweat fighting you! -- Union Jack
P.S. Please tell your manager to keep Arachne away from me!
Arachne -- Come on, was all that necessary? Not only did you kick my tail but you
broke my new shield. -- Tiki
Donna -- Hmm...I was almost ready to quit taking advantage of your lack of skills. I
guess I'll have to start challenging you again. -- Blitzkrieg
Jhans -- WTF? I have the highest attack on my team and I am freaking 3-4!!!! --
Tantric
Bookie -- Very good job on the story. I eagerly await the next installment! --
Polarius
P.S. What about a cameo role for LaMa$e? You could have him shining shoes or
scrubbing floors!
Bookie -- I am sure you will blast me for my political comments last turn! I guess
it was a low blow. In fact I am gonna try to look at it from your liberal view
point. OK...hmmm...let's cut the defense and intelligence budget and give that money
to those poor unfortunates who don't want to work. Ok...let's go to the UN and ask
them for forgiveness for wanting to protect our interests from brutal dictators. In
fact...let's drop our embargo against a certain harmless brutal dictator only 90
miles off our coast. Oh yeah, and now that the economy is starting to rebound let's
raise taxes...yeah...that'll really spur the stock market! And, and, we can donate
that money to the UN. (An organization that has a total disregard for human rights.)
YEP, I can see it now, we can have an summit with Bin Laden to ask him to forgive us
and to please quit attacking us. NO, I think I like my ideas better. I'd rather
life in a safe nation and be thought of as arrogant. (Not that anyone would think I
am arrogant!) -- Polarius
Silver Stroke -- Welcome to Jhans! It's a city with a storied history. Perhaps
you'll find it to your liking. Be warned, though, the competition is FIERCE. So
bring your "A" game and your best personals (creativity counts!). Swords high and
welcome to the kill contest! -- Bookie, Suicidal Dreams
P.S. Silver Stroke? Sounds like a bad cross-over episode between Silver Spoons and
Different Strokes. At least that's what your name reminds me of. Guess I'm showin'
my age. (shrug)
Woelfe -- You challenge the host of the contest...you die. (grin) Puh-puh please
bloodfeud with Mogash. Bibbidi really wants some of Mogash. -- Bookie
Marck -- Challenge by you. You thought I was screwed. Bibiby-Bobidy-Boo. Crit to
the head and you fell dead. Bibidy-bobidy, flippidy-floppidy, ha-ha I killed you! --
(curtsy, exit stage left) Bibidy-Bobidy-Boo
Woelfe -- Seriously, with as much sympathy as I can have for an adversary in the
contest I feel for ya. Losing a four size Slasher. Ouch! Hang in there, dude. --
Bookie
Did Jinx graduate Targen and go inactive? I thought he had bigger juevos than that.
Guess I was wrong. -- Bookie
Silver Stroke -- You killed Silver Kitty last turn. GOOD JOB! Welcome to the
"Little Girls Like...having their asses handed to them club." The whole arena's in
it already but so nice of you to join us. Shocking Toad hands out wins like they
were Snickers at Halloween. Enjoy it! -- Bookie
In my neighborhood, no one gets Snickers for Halloween. They never make it past
the door.... -- Ed.
Silver Kitty -- Here Kitty-Kitty! Here Kitty-Kitty! -- The Morgue
Blind Hypocrisy -- Naming a DA warrior after me? Awwww, how sweet. What I ever do
to get on your radar? (laugh) If that's your way of saying you got an issue with
me: Don't sing it; BRING IT!!! -- Bookie
Drips -- Happy now? You got a loss. (evil grin) Nice rating you got too. Now I
think I know why you've been on a tear lately (you came expert on the rollup didn't
you?). Nice. Very nice. -- Bookie
P.S. As a public service the KLK is trying to bury the Aimed blows in here so if you
see Arachne or Del Monte...you know what to do. (evil grin)
P.P.S. Your grandma came got her teeth. It's cool. She was worth every penny. ALL
BOTH of them. (grin)
Drips -- Let's talk over drinks. I'd like to talk about your "best wishes." (wink)
-- Shadow
Shocking Toad -- Thanks for the challenge. Thanks for the win. Thanks for the four
skills. You're easier than Drips' Grandma. -- Bookie
P.S. That's 5-1....
Sir Chester -- Thick skin and a nasty fighter too? (evil grin) I hate to say this...
but you really do fit the group. Your mouth just has that "KLK" flair for the
insult. You wanna wear a KLK t-shirt? (evil grin) Man, feels like nWo all over
again. (laugh) -- Bookie
P.S. If you listen close you can almost hear "Voo-Doo Child" starting to play in the
background. (grin)
Polarius and Turtle -- G'luck. Looks like one of us will have top team (unless
Filthy Phil steals it). May the best managed named Bookie win. (evil grin) -- Bookie
Iver -- Talk, you vibrator-seller. -- Bookie
This is one weird insult! -- Ed.
Geezus Christ look at all the lungers! (laugh) The kill contest is really starting
to pick up and with the prize of getting to name a DA warrior thrown in maybe it'll
keep improving. Swords high! -- Bookie
Manager -- Is that you? "Superior Hordes" sounds like you. If you think we're going
to let an ANDORIAN waltz in here and win, you're crazy. Sorry, bro', but you got to
go. -- Bookie
Jealousy -- Ya think it be alright if I just crashed here tonight? See, I'm in no
shape for drivin'. Anyway, I got nowhere to go. Hey, Jealousy! -- Huggy Bear
Toad -- You gonna name a warrior "Other Girls" or not? It'd be the coolest thing you
ever did. (grin) -- Bookie
P.S. Froth you!
Editor -- No prob on the last personals. It cool. -- Bookie
Azrael -- Bibidy offered Marek "Cake or Death." Guess he wasn't hungry. (shrug) --
Bookie
Slashin' Speak -- That's why they call me... -- Badda BAMM
Big Bed -- You jumped me but just like your manager's sex life you couldn't finish
what you started. Weak. -- Frosty McCloud
Brew-ha -- Nice 3-2. Almost there, dude. -- Bookie
Shawnda -- Jump on the lilypad, huh? How many people can you fit on that thing?
(evil grin) -- Bookie
Hoss -- Hang in there, boss. Just hang in there. -- Bookie
Psycho -- After that fight or should I say...embarrassment...I had to invoke my deity
for some prayer! I will recover and when I do...I'll give you some Syphilis for
sure. -- Syphilis/STDS
All -- I have sent three more to the Dark Arena this time around and hope for
something better. -- Up-In-Ya/STDS
Slapstik Sleeze -- (grin) Cognrats on your win...keep in mind that it's not over
until I say it's over. I have challenged you this turn #452 and hope you're up for
another duel? Hope our manager isn't the "AVOIDING" type? I know for sure that my
manager will never avoid anyone and has no regard for my life. We went eight
minutes...so...expect more of the same, you stinkin Kannar!!! -- Drips/STDS
Bookie -- Be impressed of me all you wish...for I could die in any of my fights and
while I'm here...you can be impressed and honor me. (smile) No, I'm not taking what
you have said as any sign of weakness nor do I have any expectations of you being
easy of me and not try to put me in a box! My manager doesn't respect me as much as
you do and that's why he has sent you something in the mail that you may share with
your pals!!! So bring on the pain...grin.... -- Drips
Polarius -- Fight under the KLK banner...I would love to...that is...if you are not
upset after my last personals? (grin) I already know that you do not take these
things personally like some I have known in the past!!! (big grin!) Yes, if you
will take me aboard...I'd be more than happy to fight under that KLK banner. I
really do not see the other banners (Andorian, etc...) if they are here I hope you
will direct me towards them. Or maybe they could just speak up and get what's coming
to their stables. Hell, I just want to duel and that's all there is to that! --
Drips
Azrael -- OH! I see you have me figured out all wrong...I'll be the one who wears
that protection when the time comes...don't really know where all those epee holes
came from, but maybe it's just me? -- Drips
Bookie -- I really had a good gut-busting laugh when I had seen your personal ad
concerning the bounty on Drips...I thought I was the only one who did that type of
thing??? Hey!!! If someone kills Drips...I will hire another gladiator in his
place...can I get 7 to 1 odds on who kills who first??? -- Up-In-Ya
Bookie -- My mouth and back side are off limits.... As far as my mother is
concerned...well...you might have a good chance with getting with her...get with
Polarius. He has the address/town in which you will find her. -- Up-In-Ya!
Kerry Bear -- Thanks for the whipping. -- Corinthian
Brickhouse -- Next time I'll go 22 min. -- Chief Bling-Bling$
All -- I'm not out of the kill contest yet. KLK-KLK BOOM! -- P-Diddy
Francois -- You may have whipped my butt but you still fight like my sister. --
Shawnda
All KLK Members -- In the end all the sun shines on will be ours. -- P.Diddy
P.S. I thought I told you we won't stop.
Bookie -- That was a great story. Keep 'em coming. -- P-Diddy
Polarius -- Loved your column. Well written and informational, but I'm still not
voting for Bush. -- P-Diddy
25 February 2004
Readers, and especially those who volunteered warriors -- My apologies for the sudden
lack of episodes. I've been sick, but expect to be back at the keyboard soon. -- the
Scribe
3 March 2004
MONGO'S MARDI GRAS MADNESS DUELMASTERS AUCTION
Mongo, aka Matt McIntosh and ex-Warden of the Dark Circle, is auctioning off his
entire collection of Duelmasters warriors and stables. Don't miss out on this chance
to own some fantastic warriors! There are ADM warriors available in every class from
Primus to Freshmen, as well as over a dozen Basic stables.
Does a Slasher with +4 attack, +4 decisiveness, +3 initiative and +2 riposte
sound good? How about a Lunger who received the benefit of a TC prize, has TVed
three times after graduating--and still hasn't maxed out his skills!? How about a
Striker in the Freshmen class who has decisiveness for a favorite learn and the MAUL
for a favorite weapon!?
Or perhaps you prefer playing in Basic. Then how does a stable with four Adept
class warriors who have a combined record of 41-19-9 sound? Or maybe a stable with
three 21-Will warriors? Or perhaps a stable with four Initiates and a Rookie who
have a combined record of 23-6-1?
The quality of the lots is excellent. All you need to view and bid on the lots
is go to:
http://members.aol.com/jvmerlino/mardigras.html
If you want to be on the mailing list to receive regular updates on the auction,
just send an e-mail to JVMerlino@aol.com. Merlin, aka John Merlino and also an ex-
Warden of the Dark Circle, will be running this auction for me. I just moved to New
Orleans and am likely currently stumbling around the French Quarter...because it's
Mardi Gras! So I have named my auction in honor of this occasion.
The auction will start on Saturday, March 13th, 2004, and will continue for
several weeks. But you should get your bids in early if you want your best chance at
owning any of these fantastic warriors and stables.
Many thanks to all for your interest and your bids,
Mongo
5 March 2004
Style Masters Symposium
Hosted by Hammer
The years have slipped by and many DM Managers have come and gone since the last
Hammer's Handbook was compiled and printed.
There is now a stirring within me to begin writing and editing yet another
Handbook with a distribution date sometime in 2005.
This Handbook will be made available via Email with a possibility of burning the
info to a CD for distribution.
Special arrangements will be made to provide the information via printed page to
those contributors who are serving sentences behind bars.
The working title of this new Handbook is "Style Masters Symposium Hosted by
Hammer".
Distribution of this Handbook is projected to be MAINLY for those DM Managers
who contribute information/articles to Hammer by June 2004.
Informative and entertaining articles should focus on insights regarding Any or
All 10 Style Masters for both the Basic and ADM arenas as well as Tourney
competition.
Articles focusing on Weapons/Armor are also encouraged for inclusion.
Whether you are a Newbie Manager without a clue or a Jaded Veteran; everyone has
discovered something about this gaming experience that is both Insightful and
Entertaining.
Email Your Articles to HammerDM@fastermail.com or send them via Diplo to either
Flower Hammerz (372) in DM 28 or Casino Hammerz (576) in DM 33.
Length and Content of the Style Masters Symposium Hosted by Hammer will be
Determined by the Quality and Quantity of Contributors Combined with the Literary
Efforts of Hammer who is currently overseas for an indefinite period of time.
Articles Contributed for this Project should be of Sufficient Length and Content
to Warrant being Included to Receive the Finished Document when Hammer has completed
this literary work to His satisfaction.
Managers contributing articles are also requested to include a DM Bio of
Themselves along with any Notable Successes and/or Failures during Their DM Career in
Basic, ADM and/or Tourney Play.
A listing of Active Stables would also be Helpful for Anyone Seeking to Reply to
Contributors via Diplo, Email or Snailmail.
May Your Blades Be Sharp And Your Wits Sharper!
-- Hammer of Flower Hammerz (372) DM 28 and Casino Hammerz (576) DM 33
18 March 2004
St. Valentine's Day Massacre Update
We are pleased to announce that the kLk sponsored St. Valentine's Day Massacre
kill contest in DM 36 is off to a great start. We are also pleased to announce that
in addition to the 10 team rollups we are also able to offer the renaming of a dark
arena warrior as a prize to the manager with the most kills. The contest is only 2
turns old and is still wide open. There are currently 5 managers tied with one kill
each. Anything can still happen so hurry up and get into the arena.
On a personal note, no other alliances have entered the arena in force to
challenge the kLk dominance. We were expecting The Firm to put up a fight for their
supposed home arena. But, they were a no show. Guess they proved what they are
really made of. *evil grin*
Perhaps another alliance would like to step in to give us a challenge. We are
throwing down the gauntlet. Perhaps the Chaos Inc. boys I keep hearing about would
like to step in and challenge the kLk for arena dominance. If you don't show up,
Chaos, don't feel bad. FAR better managers than you have been invited into Jhans but
have chosen to pass on the offer.
So if you consider yourself worthy to compete, like fierce competition, and
enjoy arenas where the personals are as fierce as the fighting, come visit JHANS DM
36. We're already planning our next contest, "Capture the Flag," and have a
storyline being actively worked on in the arena. Whatever you like about DM you can
find it in JHANS.
Bookie
mgr. of Suicidal Dreams
and Director Jhans Board of Tourism
kLk Alliance
LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS
HATRED was dealt death by RILLION in a 2 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
BIG BED viciously butchered SUPERIOR MANAGER in a 2 minute gruesome Dark Arena battle.
HELENA was murdered by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
CHAOS TUESDAY was dispatched by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
'E' COLE I assassinated RILLION in a exciting 2 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
DARK WONDER was butchered by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
DARK FINK was savagely slain by BANDIT PRINCE in a 2 minute Dark Arena struggle.
FRANCOIS devastated STRIKER in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud competition.
RAIMONDO was easily killed by BIBIDY-BOBIDY-BOO in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud melee.
MAC lost to PINK BEAR in a action packed 1 minute expert's Challenge fight.
DRIPS was luckily beaten by RAVAGE in a exciting 3 minute gruesome Challenge fight.
DONNA overpowered ARACHNE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
CONFESSION demolished SYPHILIS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition.
CORINTHIAN was devastated by DEL MONTE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge battle.
SUBZERO bested ANOTHER BLANKEE in a 1 minute amateur's Challenge bout.
TROJAN MAN overcame FROSTY MCCLOUD in a 2 minute expert vs. novice Challenge fight.
MARCIE devastated BADDA BAMM in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
SHADOW STARR narrowly killed ERRUPTION in a 2 minute bloody Challenge brawl.
MOGASH was devastated by SHAWNDA in a 1 minute brutal one-sided Challenge fight.
CLUTCH SHUTTLE beat DRIVER in a 3 minute novice's Challenge bout.
DEFIANCE was defeated by MR. ANDERSON in a 2 minute Challenge conflict.
KATHLEEN was bested by HALO 14 in a 1 minute gory veteran's Title contest.
KERRY BEAR was unbelievably bested by SKIRZA SLAPSTIK in a popular 6 minute match.
UNION JACK outwaited CLURACAN in a unpopular 14 minute fray.
OBLIVIOUS defeated HUGGY BEAR in a popular 6 minute match.
BRICKHOUSE defeated JEALOUSY RAINS in a exciting 3 minute duel.
TIKI BOB defeated BADDA BANG in a 2 minute duel.
TANTRIC overpowered MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
DEVASTATOR vanquished BROWN KITTY TOO in a 1 minute uneven bout.
CAIN was outwaited by SCORPINE in a tiresome 17 minute beginner's bout.
CHIEF BLING-BLING$ was viciously subdued by HOPE DESTRUCTOR in a 3 minute duel.
LEOTSU vanquished WRETCHED WIGHT in a exciting 1 minute brutal one-sided fray.
LUCA savagely defeated CRACKED DOLL in a 1 minute brutal novice's fight.
CAVEMAN was overpowered by DUSTY CHERUB in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
JACK RIPPER delivered the death blow upon PHOENIX in a 2 minute bloody novice's duel.
BRAIN COLLECTOR demolished KILROY WUZ HERE in a 1 minute mismatched match.
BATTLE REPORT
MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS
|FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK 22 WALL OF STEEL 24 - 11 - 0 69 |
|BASHING ATTACK 11 TOTAL PARRY 33 - 18 - 0 65 |
|TOTAL PARRY 10 STRIKING ATTACK 35 - 36 - 6 49 |
|STRIKING ATTACK 8 LUNGING ATTACK 72 - 96 - 9 43 |
|WALL OF STEEL 5 AIMED BLOW 7 - 10 - 0 41 |
|SLASHING ATTACK 5 BASHING ATTACK 22 - 32 - 2 41 |
|AIMED BLOW 2 PARRY-LUNGE 2 - 3 - 0 40 |
|PARRY-STRIKE 1 SLASHING ATTACK 12 - 24 - 2 33 |
|PARRY-LUNGE 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 1 - 3 - 0 25 |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 9 - 0 0 |
Turn 452 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are:
WALL OF STEEL 3 - 2 BASHING ATTACK 5 - 6 3 WALL OF STEEL
LUNGING ATTACK 12 - 10 SLASHING ATTACK 2 - 3 2 LUNGING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW 1 - 1 STRIKING ATTACK 3 - 5 2 STRIKING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY 5 - 5 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 0 2 TOTAL PARRY
PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 1 1 AIMED BLOW
PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 1 SLASHING ATTACK
TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
LUNGING ATTACK HALO 14 5711 12 9 1 93 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
WALL OF STEEL PINK BEAR 5883 16 8 1 83 LITTLE GIRLS LIKE... (515)
STRIKING ATTACK KERRY BEAR 3994 8 6 0 55 BLITZKRIEG (271)
TOTAL PARRY UNION JACK 6015 9 0 0 51 BLITZKRIEG (271)
SLASHING ATTACK RAVAGE 5993 7 3 0 47 THE FALLEN (524)
FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.
The overall popularity leader is KERRY BEAR 3994. The most popular warrior this turn
was KERRY BEAR 3994. The ten other most popular fighters were HUGGY BEAR 6002, HOPE
DESTRUCTOR 6131, 'E' COLE I 6065, DRIPS 6066, JEALOUSY RAINS 5995, HATRED 5938,
FROSTY MCCLOUD 6086, BADDA BANG 6013, TROJAN MAN 5710, and DRIVER 6055.
The least popular fighter this week was CAIN 6073. The other ten least popular
fighters were SCORPINE 6119, CLURACAN 6035, UNION JACK 6015, KILROY WUZ HERE 6139,
PHOENIX 6138, CAVEMAN 4652, CRACKED DOLL 6133, BROWN KITTY TOO 6118, OBLIVIOUS 6101,
and KATHLEEN 5865.