DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 01/20/2005    Duedate: 02/02/2005

JHANS ARENA

DM-36    TURN-474

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

TIMBER LION
WOLFCATS (556)
(36-6370) [13-0-0,142]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

TIMBER LION                    AUGUST
WOLFCATS (556)                 CHOP'S PRIDE (573)
(36-6370) [13-0-0,142]         (36-6659) [4-0-0,25]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

KERRY BEAR                     WHIPLASH
BLITZKRIEG (271)               BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
(36-3994) [21-13-1,118]        (36-6664) [3-1-0,20]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

THE DREAMING (529)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. SPACE WOLVES (523)          48
2. PORN IN A BARN (551)        45      WOLFCATS (556)
3. THE DREAMING (529)          42      Unchartered Team
4. HELTER SKELTER (256)        42
5. REVELATION (543)            35      CHOP'S PRIDE (573)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 WOLFCATS (556)            35  13  1 72.9   1/12 THE DREAMING (529)        9  6 0
 2- 2 THE CHADS (482)          111  69  6 61.7   2/ 2 WOLFCATS (556)            7  6 1
 3/ 4 SKATE DRAGONS (500)       43  29  4 59.7   3/ 4 THE FALLEN (524)          7  8 1
 4/ 5 REVELATION (543)         127  88  8 59.1   4/ 3 BLITZKRIEG (271)          6  7 0
 5/ 7 5440 OR FIGHT! (336)     243 209 35 53.8   5/10 PORN IN A BARN (551)      6  8 1
 6/ 8 KAMIKAZI (533)            67  59  4 53.2   6/16*CHOP'S PRIDE (573)        6  8 0
 7/ 6 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)     77  68  5 53.1   7/ 1 KAMIKAZI (533)            6  8 0
 8/10 THE DREAMING (529)        56  50  4 52.8   8/ 6 ANARKYSTS (341)           6  9 0
 9/ 9 LEGENDARY BASTARDS (259) 307 276 21 52.7   9/ 8 SKATE DRAGONS (500)       5  1 0
10-11 BABES (416)              231 216  9 51.7  10/ 5 MEMPHIS MAFIA II (542)    5  5 1
11/12 HELTER SKELTER (256)     531 500 33 51.5  11/ 9 SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)     5  5 0
12/13 BLITZKRIEG (271)         178 172 14 50.9  12/22 REVELATION (543)          5  6 0
13/ 0 STDS (534)                21  21  2 50.0  13/11 LEGENDARY BASTARDS (259)  5  8 0
14/14 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)     68  73  9 48.2  14-13*THE BEARS (565)           4  1 1
15/15 THE FALLEN (524)          72  79  5 47.7  15/24 5440 OR FIGHT! (336)      4  1 0
16/18 PORN IN A BARN (551)      39  44  3 47.0  16/19 HELTER SKELTER (256)      4  4 1
17/17 ANARKYSTS (341)          353 411 37 46.2  17/17 BOOKIE'S BROTHEL (554)    4  6 0
18/19 MEMPHIS MAFIA II (542)    37  45  9 45.1  18- 7 THE CHADS (482)           4  6 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/20*CHOP'S PRIDE (573)         7   9  0 43.8  19/18*COLONY (575)              4  6 0
20-23*THE BEARS (565)           16  21  3 43.2  20-14 BABES (416)               3  2 0
21/24 BOOKIE'S BROTHEL (554)    27  36  2 42.9  21/21 BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)     3  5 1
22-25*ILL INVADERS (7)          12  17  0 41.4  22/25*TEAM SKARABRAE (571)      3  5 0
23-26*RAW SEWAGE (559)           7  10  0 41.2  23/20 SCARRY TEAM (325)         3  6 0
24/27 SCARRY TEAM (325)        144 211  4 40.6  24/29 SPACE WOLVES (523)        3  7 0
25/ 3*COLONY (575)               4   6  0 40.0  25-23*ILL INVADERS (7)          2  1 0
26/30*TEAM SKARABRAE (571)       4  14  0 22.2  26-15*RAW SEWAGE (559)          2  2 0
27/31 SPACE WOLVES (523)         3  18  0 14.3  27/ 0 STDS (534)                0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 513): GOOEYDUCK of LAB EXPERIMENTS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 398): PROWESS of KNOT WHOLE (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 518): WOLF SPIDER of SIMPLY DESSERTS (Sweet Tooth, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 514): DREAMER of DREAMERS (Sleepy, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 513): FREDERICK DOUGLASS of I'M HISTORY (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 517): STEAL SHANK of DARK PENNACLE (Dincuru Feadagnor, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 514): BENDER of BLADES OF ICE (Lord Andarus, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 509): LADY DIVAN of SPRINGBORN (Still, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 500): MEET DEATH of INANIMATE TOFU (Talon Volksie, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 499): MINOS of SONS OF SATAN (Damion, mgr.)
 DM  36 COSMOWORLD (turn 473): TIMBER LION of WOLFCATS (Ultraist, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 464): BOB, ETERNAL, of SANDS OF TIME (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 203): HOMEY CIDE of CRIMINAL ELEMENT (Fizban, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 450): BOZO of CLOWNING AROUND (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 399): HANNAH of AMAZON ELITE (Doc Miracle, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 190): DAROSHTAN of TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jinda, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 178): LONDON QUIREBOY of CHAPEL ROCK (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 349): BUS of PUBLIC TRANSIT (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 155): ORPHAN of X-POSSE (Savant, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 392): DARK GUMBY of WASTELAND II from BONSUR (The Muffin Man)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 513): MANNEQUIN'S BEST (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 398): THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 518): OUR HIGHEST HONOR (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 514): PURPLE AND GOLD (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 513): I'M HISTORY (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 517): BATTLE BEASTS (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 514): WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 509): TERRAPIN STATION (Floyd, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 500): PENTARCHIE-18 (The Pentalque, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 499): none
 DM  36 COSMOWORLD (turn 473): KAMIKAZI (Turtle, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 464): BOY O'S (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 203): CRIMINAL ELEMENT (Fizban, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 450): COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 399): DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 190): TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jinda, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 178): SEA DOGS (One-Armed Bandit, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 349): MIDDLE WAY 10 (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 155): X-POSSE (Savant, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 392): ODD SQUAD, etc. (Doc Steele, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 513): GOOEYDUCK of LAB EXPERIMENTS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 398): FORMIDABLE of KNOT WHOLE (Sultan, mgr.)
                           YELLOW PIKE of THE GOLDEN FISH (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 517): DEWEY of GAMES LIBRARY (Nick, mgr.)
                          FROSTY of THE NUKES (Fusion, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 516): THIRD OMEN of DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 499): MARY of SHEPHERDS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 499): MINOS of SONS OF SATAN (Damion, mgr.)
                           I SEE SOUNDS of COSMIC FREAK OUT (Floyd, mgr.)
               (turn 498): GINA TAILIA of FEVER PITCH (Alfredo Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  36 COSMOWORLD (turn 473): DONNA of BABES (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 462): KORRIBIE of JINDA-BAN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 177): SVAD BONEGRIN of DAMAGE INC. (Tripwire, mgr.)
                          SLIPPERY NIPPLE of HANGOVERS (Crip, mgr.)
                          FLAMING DRAMBUIE of HANGOVERS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 349): BUS of PUBLIC TRANSIT (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 155): CANNONBALL of X-POSSE (Savant, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Last turn's column, I think:

Jhans,

     Another turn and another victim....  When will it stop?  Certainly not at the
hands of puppet Skirza or its diminutive manager Azreal.  And looking over the
challenger champions, I really don't see any there that deserve notice other than my
alliance mates.  And now we have this Baphomet character running his mouth.  Who is
he?  Anyone ever heard of him?  Surely he must be some great manager that we should
cower before his wit?  Didn't think so, just a fool to be ignored.

Timber Lion,
DOOMcorps

This turn's column:

Jhans -- Yet again I sit here undefeated....  Can anyone beat me?  Hopefully the dark
arena will provide us with some worthy recruits to use the favorite potions we won so
Ultraist doesn't transfer us out and a new team in.  Either way, once I graduate I
suspect this team (or whichever the boss has here) will be mostly for tournament
prepping anyway so....
     Skirza, sometimes weapon penalties are a necessary evil.  I mean you wouldn't
want to go against an undefeated TP wielding a war flail would you?  Oh wait, never
mind. -- Timber Lion, DOOMcorps

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings warriors!  It is I, Zontani Sharp Eyes, here to bring report of the 
clash and bustle of the weekly JHANS games.  Former top team KAMIKAZI was unseated 
this week as THE DREAMING moved up from 12th ranking to take the top spot with a 
3-2-0 record for the round.  I have begun to suspect trickery on the part of THE 
DREAMING.  How else weeks like this one's 3-2-0?  How else the sudden move to 1st 
team?  Did only my eyes note the 4-1-0 record which 5440 OR FIGHT! managed to post 
this round?  I don't doubt that such a record will draw challengers!  SANDPAPER 
CONDOM caught the eye of many in the gladiatorial commission as he skillfully bested 
PIGFEED PICKTAN and was awarded 26 points in recognition.  In one of the week's more 
notable duels, BOARDSLIDE put down DEVASTATOR, causing him to lose 18 points of 
recognition in the process.  Who here was not present for the title fight this week 
as BADDA BAMM boldly challenged TIMBER LION in order to strive for the Duelmasters 
honors?  Not for nothing has TIMBER LION in the past laid claim to the Duelmaster's 
throne, and this week she's proven hers combat skill yet again.  Heed this!  A seer 
has warned that if exactly 6 die in duels this week, the whole city shall perish!  
Just remember...5 or 7!   
     Many and various are the arts of battle.  In JHANS "art" is a word that has long 
since passed from the language!  JHANS, city of gladiators!  Mighty among the names 
of thy guilds is LEGENDARY BASTARDS, a guild shunned and avoided by many in the 
weekly duels.  If you didn't look down dark alleys you'd have been hard pressed to 
find any of MEMPHIS MAFIA II last week.  Busy avoiding LEGENDARY BASTARDS?  Mighty 
fighters cannot but expect competition from those below.  DONNA THE HUNTRESS take 
warning!  You have more than a few enemies in JHANS.  REAPER must really be harboring 
a grudge against the ANARKYSTS guild!  Merciless, 25 challenged down SLASHIN' SPECK 
points this week to duel with she.  Surprising everyone, SLASHIN' SPECK won victory 
over REAPER, earning 23 points of recognition in the process!  A knave's just 
desserts are the sweetest victory.  At the gambling halls I have started to bet money 
on THE LOVE BELOW.  He has got the courage it takes.  Witness his challenge this turn 
against OBLIVIOUS!  The THE DREAMING stable will be up late tonight, for indeed it 
was THE LOVE BELOW who claimed victory in the contest, ascending 29 in recognition!  
For some warriors honor is not important--only empty victory.  See, gladiators, how 
SUBZERO of KAMIKAZI challenged down 25 points to SASQUATCH COWBOY.  Few would not 
have guessed the outcome of the bout as SASQUATCH COWBOY was overcame by SUBZERO.  Is 
this what passes for courage in JHANS?  A match that raised a few eyebrows at the 
games this week, it seems that BETA posted a challenge against the more highly 
recognized ARACHNIA.  The results, you ask?  Well, the firebrand BETA was subdued by 
ARACHNIA.  Remember warriors, this is the discipline of steel.   
     Vendettas.  Bloodied blades and broken spears.  Indeed the city has seen more 
than its fair share of red in recent times.  Look no more for TIGERWOLF in the arena 
or on the streets of JHANS.  His fate was sealed in the Dark Arena.  Inevitable for 
one at 8-4-1.  Was I the only one shocked to see the well respected fighter TIGERWOLF 
(8-4-1) appear on the sands of the Dark Arena?  He is now dead.  Some guilds are 
strict but few are as heartless as BLITZKRIEG.  Witness, last turn they sent JOLLY 
ROGER, a 4-1-0 fighter, to the Dark Arena!  HEAVY MENTAL has sworn to take up 
religion upon living to tell of its recent bout with the Dark Arena horrors.  A rare 
thing indeed!  My hearty congratulations UNION JACK, for thy revenge upon HAIL MARY, 
slayer of thy fallen comrade.  Next time he will know better, eh?  Dark alleys may 
hide both secrets and assassins.  In the arena there is only the brightness of steel. 
Keep vigil always!   
     If it were not for my skills as a spy I would have been mugged three times 
already in JHANS.  Nice atmosphere you have here!  More than a sharp eye must I keep, 
indeed a stout pair of legs must I keep as well!  The endless paths of Alastari await 
me!  Till next we meet remember:  a fool flies into a rage quickly and often.  The 
wise are angered by the same thing only once.  Zontani Sharp Eyes  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TIMBER LION 6370             13   0  0   142       WOLFCATS (556)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KERRY BEAR 3994              21  13  1   118       BLITZKRIEG (271)
-50/50 5603                   14   4  0   111       SKATE DRAGONS (500)
 SANDPAPER CONDOM 6311         9   6  2   110       MEMPHIS MAFIA II (542)
 CLURACAN 6035                17   5  0   106       THE DREAMING (529)
 BOARDSLIDE 5608              13   8  4   105       SKATE DRAGONS (500)
 KILL'EM KREPP 5892           18   8  1   102       ANARKYSTS (341)
 THE LOVE BELOW 6187          10   4  2    99       THE DREAMING (529)
 BADDA BAMM 6075              14  12  0    98       SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
 SKIRZA SLAPSTIK 5996         18  13  1    96       THE FALLEN (524)
 SHAWNDA 6032                 12  10  1    93       THE DREAMING (529)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-MARCIE 6076                  13  11  1    92       BABES (416)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SLASHIN' SPECK 5854          15  21  2    90       ANARKYSTS (341)
 UNION JACK 6015              22   6  0    88       BLITZKRIEG (271)
-WHIRLING MIST 5026           21  12  0    87       LEGENDARY BASTARDS (259)
 PIGFEED PICKTAN 6124         18   6  0    83       ANARKYSTS (341)
 OBLIVIOUS 6101               17   7  0    82       KAMIKAZI (533)
 DEVASTATOR 6079              15  12  2    81       THE FALLEN (524)
 HAY RIDE 6305                13   3  0    81       PORN IN A BARN (551)
-RECOUNT 6333                  9   1  0    80       THE CHADS (482)
 REAPER 6150                  12   9  0    74       KAMIKAZI (533)
 SUBZERO 6120                 15   8  2    69       KAMIKAZI (533)
 FRANKENSLOSH 5901            12   5  0    68       HELTER SKELTER (256)
-RAKAR 5307                   11   6  1    68       IRON TIGERS (484)
 MONKEY SHINE 5927            10   4  0    67       HELTER SKELTER (256)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BENANDANTI 6467               9   2  1    66       HELTER SKELTER (256)
 DONNA THE HUNTRESS 6307       7   9  0    66       THE FALLEN (524)
 BADDA BANG 6013              10  18  0    65       THE FALLEN (524)
 RAVEN DARKHART 6465           5   5  1    61       BOOKIE'S BROTHEL (554)
 RIZZLE-DIZZLE 5923            8   3  0    58       5440 OR FIGHT! (336)
 SHADOW STARR 5999            13  17  1    57       SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BLACKJACK 6163                9   7  4    55       MEMPHIS MAFIA II (542)
 SLAYIN STAYNER 5891          13  13  1    53       ANARKYSTS (341)
 SPATHIC 6189                  6   5  0    52       5440 OR FIGHT! (336)
 THE BEAST 6296               10   5  0    51       REVELATION (543)
 PIXIE DUST 6308              10   5  1    48       MEMPHIS MAFIA II (542)
 NEON'S MAMMA 6376             6   5  0    48       BOOKIE'S BROTHEL (554)
 APOCALYPSE 6633               4   1  0    46       REVELATION (543)
 KIZZY LYNNE 6375              7   4  0    45       BOOKIE'S BROTHEL (554)
-DRIPS 6066                    6   5  0    43       STDS (534)
-ELECTRONIC 6562               5   4  1    41       THE CHADS (482)
 ELIZABETH RABBIT 6425         5   9  0    40       SCARRY TEAM (325)
 T'HAEL 6581                   6   2  0    36       THE FALLEN (524)
 SASQUATCH COWBOY 6491         7   4  1    35       LEGENDARY BASTARDS (259)
 ARACHNIA 6613                 5   3  0    35       KAMIKAZI (533)
 ONE TRICK PONY 6589           4   5  1    35       PORN IN A BARN (551)
-GROUCHO 6636                  4   0  1    35       THE BEARS (565)
 I.B. KLONIN 6408              3   7  1    35       HELTER SKELTER (256)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SYPHILIS 6129                 6   4  0    33       STDS (534)
 HEAVY MENTAL 6457             5   6  2    33       HELTER SKELTER (256)
 OLD DIRT MCGIRT 6601          5   4  1    33       LEGENDARY BASTARDS (259)
-ZEPPO 6638                    1   3  1    33       THE BEARS (565)
 GAMBIT 6161                   6  11  2    32       MEMPHIS MAFIA II (542)
-DEAD GOLDFISH 6419            2   2  0    31       RAW SEWAGE (559)
 MAVERICK 6608                 4   3  0    30       BLITZKRIEG (271)
-HARPO 6637                    3   1  0    29       THE BEARS (565)
 KALISTA J'NAE 6631            4   0  0    28       SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
 PIMP BEEFAROONY 6579          7   1  0    27       THE DREAMING (529)
 GITO GITO HUSTLER 6291        5   5  0    26       5440 OR FIGHT! (336)
 HELIX PRIME 6344              2   0  0    26       SPACE WOLVES (523)
 AUGUST 6659                   4   0  0    25       CHOP'S PRIDE (573)
 KATH AERIS 6381               1   1  0    25       SPACE WOLVES (523)
-POUNCE 6624                   1   1  0    25       WOLFCATS (556)
 SALLY 6426                    5   9  0    24       SCARRY TEAM (325)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-HOMOCIDAL 6640                2   2  0    24       THE BEARS (565)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KILL-KID FIZZLE 6646          4   0  0    23       SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
 HAIL MARY 6389                3   5  1    23       BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
 'WERD 3870                    3   2  0    23       5440 OR FIGHT! (336)
 SCRATCH FURY 6647             3   0  0    22       5440 OR FIGHT! (336)
 BANANA GORILLA 5276           2  12  0    22       SCARRY TEAM (325)
 SAVOIR FAIRE 6656             2   1  0    21       CHOP'S PRIDE (573)
-GEORGE W 6420                 4   0  0    20       RAW SEWAGE (559)
 WHIPLASH 6664                 3   1  0    20       BLIND HYPOCRISY (504)
 EPSILON 6676                  2   0  0    16       COLONY (575)
-HIV 6591                      1   0  0    16       STDS (534)
-MAJOR MISTAKE 54              4   2  0    15       ILL INVADERS (7)
 COSMOWORLD CARNIE 6623        2   2  0    15       SUICIDAL DREAMS (525)
-NADYA 6586                    2   1  0    15       TEAM SKARABRAE (571)
-MAJOR DILEMMA 319             2   1  0    15       ILL INVADERS (7)
 JIGSAW KILLER 6627            3   4  1    14       LEGENDARY BASTARDS (259)
-NIKITA 6639                   3   1  0    13       BABES (416)
-CLAP 6151                     2   1  0    13       STDS (534)
 ALPHA 6675                    1   1  0    13       COLONY (575)
 BEAUTIFUL SADNESS 6558        2   5  0    11       MEMPHIS MAFIA II (542)
 FROSTY FROTHINGSLUSH 6684     2   1  0    11       LEGENDARY BASTARDS (259)
 SERPENT OF OLD 6696           1   0  0    11       REVELATION (543)
-GENERAL ANARCHY 53            2   4  0    10       ILL INVADERS (7)
 BETA 6677                     1   1  0    10       COLONY (575)
 WHISKERS 6701                 1   0  0    10       PORN IN A BARN (551)
 PLEASURE SPOTS 6707           1   0  0     8       WOLFCATS (556)
-CORP. PUNISHMENT 57           1   3  0     7       ILL INVADERS (7)
-TRICH 6604                    1   0  0     7       STDS (534)
 AYLA SECURA 6661              0   1  0     7       SPACE WOLVES (523)
 IKTHANUS 6691                 0   1  0     7       SPACE WOLVES (523)
-DON'T ASK 6418                1   3  0     6       RAW SEWAGE (559)
-DIEBOLD 6645                  1   3  0     6       THE CHADS (482)
 ALENDAR 6708                  1   0  0     6       TEAM SKARABRAE (571)
 TRA'SHELLE XANIA 6630         1   3  0     6       BOOKIE'S BROTHEL (554)
-TSLOTHA GARNATH 6634          1   1  0     6       TEAM SKARABRAE (571)
 BRILHASTI 6584                0   4  0     6       TEAM SKARABRAE (571)
 SLAM-BANG 6658                1   2  0     5       CHOP'S PRIDE (573)
 DHAMPIRA 6703                 0   1  0     5       SPACE WOLVES (523)
 PRINCE OF LIES 6697           0   1  0     5       REVELATION (543)
-YESTERDAY'S TACO 6417         0   4  0     4       RAW SEWAGE (559)
 PUNDIT 6655                   0   4  0     4       CHOP'S PRIDE (573)
 OMEGA 6678                    0   2  0     2       COLONY (575)
 DELTA 6674                    0   2  0     2       COLONY (575)
-USED CATHETER 6416            0   1  0     1       RAW SEWAGE (559)
 AEMILIUS PAULUS 6692          0   1  0     1       CHOP'S PRIDE (573)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
DA18 6625              1  6 0 ANARKYSTS 341         RILLION 21            474 NONE    
JOLLY ROGER 6626       4  2 0 BLITZKRIEG 271        STONE GOLEM 26        474 NONE    
COBRA COMMANDER 6592   3  5 0 BLITZKRIEG 271        HAIL MARY 6389        473 JUST REV
SQUEAKY FROMME 6622    1  3 0 BOOKIE'S BROTHEL 554  HIGH ELF 19           474 NONE    
MISCOUNT 6090          9  6 0 THE CHADS 482         DEVASTATOR 6079       473         
SLIPPERS MCGHEE 24     0  1 0 DARK ARENA 0          HEAVY MENTAL 6457     474 NONE    
WHOAMI? 6711           0  1 0 THE DREAMING 529      STONE GOLEM 26        474 NONE    
SEXY COW 6699          0  1 0 PORN IN A BARN 551    SLIPPERS MCGHEE 24    474 NONE    
GOAT CHEESE 6700       0  1 0 PORN IN A BARN 551    RIPPLES DORRIGAN 23   474 NONE    
HOUND OF SATAN 6610    3  4 0 REVELATION 543        BLACKJACK 6163        474         
GOTTERDAMURUNG 6585    0  4 0 TEAM SKARABRAE 571    BLACK ORC 20          474 NONE    
TIGERWOLF 6366         8  5 1 WOLFCATS 556          WURM KIN 27           474 NONE    

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
BOOKIE 6706            0  1 0 WOLFCATS 556          HIGH ELF 19           474 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

     Everyone -- You may have noticed there are no spotlights in this turn's
     newsletter.  They didn't get lost, they're just on hold.  If you don't want your
     manager or warriors featured in other peoples' spotlights, now is your chance to
     say so, and I'll do my best to enforce it (barring major brain fades, which have
     been known to happen).  Then you can all get back to abusing one another--minus
     those who have opted out. -- Ed.

Bookie -- Don't impose upon anyone's intelligence and feign as though we are friends,
I properly dislike you.  As far as bowing down to you I think you must be using the
wrong search criteria, for that is never the answer to any truth you seek with me.
Your fixation with other peoples' mothers, your long term sociopathic tendencies,
your constant social indiscretions, your deeply personal contempt for everyone around
you and your overall lack of respect for anything that anyone may hold dear or find
joyous makes me want to disassociate from you.  It's nothing personal but I'd prefer
not to even duel on the same sands as you much less apply pointless wear to my
claid's edge while chopping you down.  Let it be known in the clearest and most level
of tones that I have nothing for you.  Not even the spirit of competition.  Say what
you will in response to me and then listen closely because all you will hear are the
echoes of loneliness.  Let there be no mistaking, you will not find my blades vacant.
You will find them deeply stained by the blood of your kin yet they will forever be
wielded in apathy. -- !ll.kid.k, Warlord of DOOMcorps, Guildmaster of Legendary
Bastards

Baphomet -- Thanks for ousting the truth of that encounter at the Palpitating Pig.  I
guess that imposter looked more like me than I thought if he fooled you.  If I'd
known he treated Iver, that way I wouldn't have cut off his hands. -- Azrael

Ill Kid -- Nice try and thanks for all the learns. -- Pdiddy

Doom -- If this is all you guys have, I'm not impressed. -- Pdiddy

Baphomet -- Welcome to Jhans.  Make yourself at home. -- PdiddykLk

Az -- Nice stories, keep it up. -- PdiddyKlK

Bookie -- They can't stop us (dusts shoulder off). -- PdiddyKLK

Turtle (until the name change) -- Keep up the good work, sir. -- Pdiddyklk

Rillion -- What have we said about tourney prepping in OUR arena?  Had to DEVASTATE
you and remind you, I guess. -- Azrael

Mordraith -- Just trying to get those little dashes off your team.  Don't take it
personally.  (the story that is) -- Azrael

Saint, Keeper of Lists -- I am changing my manager name from TURTLE to NEMESIS. --
Nemesis, whose nemesis? (looks at Jekyll) that's right

     Got it. -- The Saint, keeper of lists

Donna -- Congrats on getting your call!  Way to go out in style. -- Union Jack

Arachnia -- Thanks a lot.  My manager told me that since I lost to someone with as
few skills as you, I didn't deserve to live. -- Jolly Roger

The Love Below -- What a terrible match up.  I got me some of that love below and
didn't like it! -- The Beast

Baphomet -- I saw that you signed up for the Duel 2 site.  Do you ever have access to
email?  If so post your email address and I'll send you something that may change the
way you view DOOMcorps and the KlK. -- Polarius

Ultraist & Timberlion -- Congratulations again! -- !

Ultraist & Wolfcats -- You sent three to the Dark Arena and you're still holding it
down in the arena.  I thought you were supposed to have been taken down turns ago?
Ah, well, some folks just have no work ethic whatsoever, eh? -- !

Cosmo & Benandanti -- Congratulations on your spectacular performance!  Benandanti,
watching you fight was truly amazing and I was most impressed by the skill you
showed. -- !

Angus -- Nice to see you here, my friend.  You are always welcome in Jhans: City of
DOOM. -- !ll.kid.k

Baphomet -- Golden Hippogriff Quill, eh?  Yeah, you are definitely not the alpha-male
on your block.  Despite Azrael being a new manager he is the only of his newbie
cohorts under 500.  So for me to give credit to him for his lousy performance would
be a slap in the face to half the arena.  Besides, we all know it's easy to go above
500 with a new team and much harder to keep that team above 500 as it matures.  Not
to mention that Azrael is constantly coached by a veteran, so thanks for running your
mouth but your point is moot as are all your other mindless ramblings.  Oh, and as
far as your trailer trash rant, I don't think you want to get personal, do you?  Now
that I've given you that little bit of attention you were dying to have, let me set
some things straight.  You are of so little significance to me that anything you
write to me in the future will be a waste of your precious ink.  Furthermore, for you
to even be here in Alastari and participating in the duels disgusts me and I find it
unacceptable that someone in your position is allowed to do these things.  And last
but definitely not least, I do not associate with your kind and for you to have
already made personal attacks towards me in the newsletter shows me that you are far
from being rehabilitated.  You may want to work on that good behavior some more,
skippy. -- !ll.kid.k, Warlord of DOOMcorps, Guildmaster of Legendary Bastards

Talon Darkhart -- Of course I know who I am.  The *REAL QUESTION* is...do they want
to find out? -- Baphomet

klk -- WOW!  The rookies showed off last turn.  8-2-1 vs. DOOMCorps.  The beer is on
me!!! -- Baphomet, TCB, Illuminati Confederation of Alliances

Azrael -- Thanks for your most warm welcome.  I look forward to fighting beside all
my hillbilly brethren. -- Baphomet

Ultraist -- Don't know if I could or not.  But, I'll let you know how I fare running
a team much like that, created by a rookie as his first team, and with absolutely no
tourney experience.  Now or ever.  You might want to see a medic for that strain in
your shoulder.  You know, the one you got from patting yourself on the back. --
Baphomet

!.kid.k -- I'm not klk...but...count *THIS!* (sticking up that most special and
distinct digit) -- Baphomet

Jigsaw Killer -- Looked like a puzzle with a couple pieces gone! -- August

Frosty Frothingslush -- Man, you're cold. -- Pun -- dit intended

Gotterdamurung -- Gott dang I rung and u suck! -- Savoir Faire

Tslotha Garnath -- Whoa!  Who'da thunk it? -- Slam-Bam (thank you ma'am)

24 December 2004
Due to requests, the Turf War IV will be postponed until turn 225 (approx May/June
2005).  Sorry about the inconvenience. -- Baphomet, host of TW 4

12 January 2005
On Jhans turn number 476 (due on Feb. 16, 2005) the Second Annual kLk St. Valentine's
Massacre Kill Contest will begin.  The rules are simple; the team with the most kills
on the last turn wins.  Last year's winner was Shocking Toad.  Can he repeat?  Could
DOOMcorps crush all challengers?  Will the kLk prevail?  Or will you be the
independent manager to show that alliances aren't all that?  Come on to Jhans and
let's find out!
     Prizes are:  1st.  Renaming of a Dark Arena monster and five roll-up
                        certificates or $25.00 deposited in your account.
                  2nd.  Renaming of a Stand-In monster.
     Come on and celebrate the Delarquan way!
                                                                   Azrael

15 January 2005
     BR 4 is upon us!  First turn is due on 1/29/05.  Many thanks to RSI for helping
supply a great prize for the winner and those who meet the 90% endurance criteria.
     Winning prize:  6 months free play, a +1 bonus potion, a limited damage potion,
a favorites knowledge potion, a minor stat-switch prize, and renaming a Dark Arena
creature.
     Endurance prizes:  a +1 bonus potion to all teams that fight 90% of the possible
fights during the contest.
     For details, visit Talcama's newletter or http://www.geocities.com/assurnasir/br4
     To join, simply bring a team to DM 18, announce your entry in the personals, and
follow the very simple rule of not avoiding!

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

TIGERWOLF was butchered by WURM KIN in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Dark Arena fight.
JOLLY ROGER was killed by STONE GOLEM in a 3 minute brutal Dark Arena melee.
DA18 was assassinated by RILLION in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
HEAVY MENTAL butchered SLIPPERS MCGHEE in a 1 minute gory Dark Arena contest.
GOTTERDAMURUNG was assassinated by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena match.
SQUEAKY FROMME was butchered by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
SEXY COW was slaughtered by SLIPPERS MCGHEE in a 2 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
GOAT CHEESE was executed by RIPPLES DORRIGAN in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena brawl.
BOOKIE was assassinated by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute Dark Arena melee.
WHOAMI? was dispatched by STONE GOLEM in a 2 minute Dark Arena duel.
UNION JACK won victory over HAIL MARY in a 5 minute one-sided Bloodfeud duel.
BENANDANTI vanquished PIXIE DUST in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
REAPER was savagely defeated by SLASHIN' SPECK in a 2 minute expert's Challenge match.
BADDA BAMM was subdued by TIMBER LION in a 2 minute master's Challenge Title match.
SANDPAPER CONDOM handily defeated PIGFEED PICKTAN in a 1 minute Challenge contest.
THE LOVE BELOW savagely defeated OBLIVIOUS in a 3 minute veteran's Challenge brawl.
KILL'EM KREPP defeated SHAWNDA in a 1 minute veteran's Challenge duel.
HAY RIDE devastated BADDA BANG in a exciting 3 minute bloody uneven Challenge duel.
SUBZERO devastated SASQUATCH COWBOY in a exciting 1 minute one-sided Challenge brawl.
SLAYIN STAYNER was demolished by DONNA THE HUNTRESS in a 2 minute Challenge bout.
SPATHIC overpowered GAMBIT in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
RIZZLE-DIZZLE unbelievably bested SHADOW STARR in a 3 minute Challenge contest.
MAVERICK was vanquished by RAVEN DARKHART in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
GITO GITO HUSTLER lost to T'HAEL in a 2 minute bloody Challenge fray.
'WERD defeated BEAUTIFUL SADNESS in a 2 minute Challenge match.
TRA'SHELLE XANIA was savagely defeated by WHIPLASH in a 4 minute Challenge fight.
SCRATCH FURY won victory over BRILHASTI in a 1 minute novice's Challenge fight.
KALISTA J'NAE demolished JIGSAW KILLER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
ALPHA lost to ONE TRICK PONY in a exciting 1 minute novice vs. expert Challenge fray.
PUNDIT was overcome by FROSTY FROTHINGSLUSH in a 6 minute novice's Challenge duel.
BETA was defeated by ARACHNIA in a action packed 1 minute gory Challenge duel.
DEVASTATOR was overpowered by BOARDSLIDE in a popular 2 minute one-sided match.
SKIRZA SLAPSTIK was narrowly defeated by CLURACAN in a 6 minute veteran's bout.
KERRY BEAR handily defeated MONKEY SHINE in a 2 minute mismatched match.
FRANKENSLOSH vanquished KIZZY LYNNE in a 4 minute mismatched fight.
THE BEAST narrowly defeated ELIZABETH RABBIT in a unpopular 13 minute brutal match.
BLACKJACK easily killed HOUND OF SATAN in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
NEON'S MAMMA narrowly defeated CAPTURED ORC in a 9 minute conflict.
SYPHILIS was beaten by APOCALYPSE in a 2 minute bout.
COSMOWORLD CARNIE lost to HELIX PRIME in a 1 minute bout.
I.B. KLONIN was handily defeated by OLD DIRT MCGIRT in a 1 minute mismatched match.
PIMP BEEFAROONY won victory over SALLY in a popular 4 minute match.
BANANA GORILLA demolished OMEGA in a crowd pleasing 1 minute uneven duel.
KATH AERIS demolished BOOKIE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute gory uneven conflict.
SLAM-BANG was bested by PLEASURE SPOTS in a 2 minute gruesome amateur's match.
AUGUST unbelievably bested AYLA SECURA in a popular 4 minute brutal novice's match.
DELTA was defeated by SERPENT OF OLD in a 2 minute novice's duel.
KILL-KID FIZZLE outlasted PRINCE OF LIES in a unpopular 18 minute novice's fray.
EPSILON won victory over DHAMPIRA in a 2 minute novice's match.
SAVOIR FAIRE handily defeated CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
IKTHANUS was demolished by WHISKERS in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
ALENDAR overcame AEMILIUS PAULUS in a 1 minute amateur's contest.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|TOTAL PARRY                     19         TOTAL PARRY      107 -  78 -  2      58  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  19         WALL OF STEEL     34 -  29 -  0      54  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  11         BASHING ATTACK    56 -  54 -  6      51  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 11         AIMED BLOW        51 -  50 -  2      50  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                 10         LUNGING ATTACK   129 - 158 - 14      45  |
|AIMED BLOW                       8         PARRY-LUNGE        7 -   9 -  0      44  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     5         STRIKING ATTACK   53 -  71 -  2      43  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         PARRY-STRIKE      19 -  28 -  0      40  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    2         SLASHING ATTACK   41 -  66 -  5      38  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      5 -  12 -  0      29  |

Turn 474 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

TOTAL PARRY       12 -  7     BASHING ATTACK     5 -  6         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       3 -  2     LUNGING ATTACK     8 - 11         2  TOTAL PARRY    
WALL OF STEEL      3 -  2     AIMED BLOW         3 -  5         2  STRIKING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    5 -  5     STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  7         2  WALL OF STEEL  
                              PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         2  BASHING ATTACK 
                              PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  2     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
TOTAL PARRY      TIMBER LION 6370           13   0  0  142 WOLFCATS (556)
STRIKING ATTACK  KERRY BEAR 3994            21  13  1  118 BLITZKRIEG (271)
LUNGING ATTACK   BOARDSLIDE 5608            13   8  4  105 SKATE DRAGONS (500)
BASHING ATTACK   THE LOVE BELOW 6187        10   4  2   99 THE DREAMING (529)
WALL OF STEEL    SKIRZA SLAPSTIK 5996       18  13  1   96 THE FALLEN (524)
AIMED BLOW       MONKEY SHINE 5927          10   4  0   67 HELTER SKELTER (256)
PARRY-STRIKE     SPATHIC 6189                6   5  0   52 5440 OR FIGHT! (336)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is KERRY BEAR 3994.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was WHIPLASH 6664.  The ten other most popular fighters were THE LOVE BELOW 6187, 
SHADOW STARR 5999, PUNDIT 6655, AYLA SECURA 6661, SLASHIN' SPECK 5854, BADDA BANG 
6013, BOARDSLIDE 5608, SALLY 6426, GITO GITO HUSTLER 6291, and KERRY BEAR 3994.

The least popular fighter this week was PRINCE OF LIES 6697.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were KILL-KID FIZZLE 6646, THE BEAST 6296, NEON'S MAMMA 6376, 
AEMILIUS PAULUS 6692, IKTHANUS 6691, DELTA 6674, SLAM-BANG 6658, PIMP BEEFAROONY 
6579, I.B. KLONIN 6408, and HOUND OF SATAN 6610.

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

DONNA (36-5966) BABES (416)