DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 07/23/2015    Duedate: 08/05/2015

JHANS ARENA

DM-36    TURN-740

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

CHEETAH VON TEESE
FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)
(36-6298) [16-6-0,101]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

CHEETAH VON TEESE              POSITION IS EMPTY
FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)       
(36-6298) [16-6-0,101]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

RITA HAYBURNER                 THIS CAMEL
FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)       STILLMATIC (630)
(36-6580) [9-9-0,95]           (36-7710) [18-16-0,86]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

STILLMATIC (630)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)    26
2. STILLMATIC (630)             1      STILLMATIC (630)
3. PHILANTHROPISTS 2 (624)      0      Unchartered Team
4. DEVIATION (632)              0
5. FERMENTED (651)              0      HONEST MAN! (306)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 1 ORDER (635)               15   4  1 78.9   1/ 1 STILLMATIC (630)          9  4 0
 2- 2 MIDNIGHT GREMLINS (631)   46  21  1 68.7   2- 2 PHILANTHROPISTS 2 (624)   4  2 1
 3- 3 PHILANTHROPISTS 2 (624)   15   8  1 65.2   3- 5 VOW TO DESTROY (601)      2  0 1
 4- 5 DEVIATION (632)           65  47  3 58.0   4- 7 DEVIATION (632)           2  1 1
 5/ 6 STILLMATIC (630)         176 129 12 57.7   5- 6*FERMENTED (651)           2  1 0
 6/ 0 FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)  53  50  1 51.5   6/ 0 FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)  2  2 0
 7- 8*FERMENTED (651)            4   5  0 44.4   7- 3*WEIRD STUDENTS (656)      2  3 0
 8- 9 VOW TO DESTROY (601)      98 141 15 41.0   8- 8 ORDER (635)               1  0 0
 9-10*WEIRD STUDENTS (656)       8  12  0 40.0   9-11*BOOK STORE (650)          1  4 0
10-11 BIG LAKE BULLIES (488)    54  91  5 37.2  10-12 BIG LAKE BULLIES (488)    0  4 0
11-12*BOOK STORE (650)           1   4  0 20.0  11-13*WASTED MONEY (648)        0  2 0
12-13*WASTED MONEY (648)         0   2  0  0.0  12- 9 MIDNIGHT GREMLINS (631)   0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                      SPY REPORT

     Good day, friends and fiends, welcome to your friendly neighborhood spyreport.  
I doubt JHANS will ever be the same.  Now keep the taverns open late tonight, for 
there are sorrows to drown for WEIRD STUDENTS, whose 0-0-0 this turn dropped them by 
4 into 7th.  DEVIATION stable has parlayed this turn's 0-0-0 into a 3 space move up 
the rankings.  This brings them up to 4th place.  Good work, guys!  And let's see, 
CHEETAH VON TEESE fought MAIN EVENT and gained 10 points and contributed to FUR YOUR 
EYES ONLY's 2-2-0.  MAIN EVENT has lost to CHEETAH VON TEESE, falling 5 points, while 
helping make STILLMATIC a 2-2-0 turn.  Due to his absence and inability to defend the 
throne, KERN has lost the title of Duelmaster.  We should ask CHEETAH VON TEESE about 
the thrill of victory, and what being the new Duelmaster does for a warrior, she's 
now the one to ask.  Can someone confirm a rumor for me?  I hear the top team makes 
their losing fighters do dishes at Lucas Lounge until they win.  Maybe?   
     The crowd's roar, the smell of iron and leather, mixed with sweat, what more 
could a warrior ask of life?  Well, besides that.   
     A coward dies a thousand deaths, a brave man only once.  Wise men know this to 
be true.  Is it really true that JHANS has more dishwashers per capita that fighters? 
Just thought I'd ask...   
     Remember, blood on the purple robe does not change it from a purple robe.  Dare 
to fight bravely.  Always good to rest in JHANS, but never good to wear out my 
welcome.  Look for me in future turns.  Until the sun next rises and my pen sets to 
paper-- Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CHEETAH VON TEESE 6298       16   6  0   101       FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-KERN 7601                    15   1  1   155       ORDER (635)
-EDGECRUSHER 7765             12   7  1   121       VOW TO DESTROY (601)
-SILVERBLEED 7720             11   6  1    96       VOW TO DESTROY (601)
 RITA HAYBURNER 6580           9   9  0    95       FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-AKILAY 5392                  16  17  0    87       BIG LAKE BULLIES (488)
 THIS CAMEL 7710              18  16  0    86       STILLMATIC (630)
 MAIN EVENT 7845               9   6  1    79       STILLMATIC (630)
-SUN MOON STAR 7848            6   0  1    70       VOW TO DESTROY (601)
-MEGATRON 7568                11  10  0    68       DEVIATION (632)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DENMON 7494                   7   3  0    62       PHILANTHROPISTS 2 (624)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 NOT POSITIVE 7844            12   3  0    56       STILLMATIC (630)
 NO BEST 7846                 11   4  0    55       STILLMATIC (630)
-KULICK 5728                   6   5  1    50       BIG LAKE BULLIES (488)
-KINETIC PROVOCATION 7644      5   4  0    49       DEVIATION (632)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DOOBY DOOBY DOO 7576          3   1  0    30       MIDNIGHT GREMLINS (631)
-CINDER WAVE 7493              4   0  0    29       PHILANTHROPISTS 2 (624)
-IMMATURE IVAN 7901            3   1  0    29       WEIRD STUDENTS (656)
-FRANTIC FRED 7904             2   2  0    29       WEIRD STUDENTS (656)
 PAMELA GANDERSON 7707         2   4  1    28       FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)
-FIONN MACCOOL 7860            2   4  0    28       MIDNIGHT GREMLINS (631)
-EARTHA KITTEN 7738            3   1  0    25       FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-STUMBLE STALKER 7497          3   0  0    22       PHILANTHROPISTS 2 (624)
-TOLSTOY 7865                  1   0  0    21       BOOK STORE (650)
-RUNNING DOWNHILL 7758         4   0  0    19       DEVIATION (632)
-DESOLACE 7921                 2   1  1    19       VOW TO DESTROY (601)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-SOUL KITCHEN 7743             2   6  2    18       DEVIATION (632)
-ANGRY ORCHARD 7868            2   2  0    16       FERMENTED (651)
-BUD 7869                      1   1  0    16       FERMENTED (651)
-INTENSE IAN 7903              2   2  0    15       WEIRD STUDENTS (656)
-ARM FALL 7926                 1   1  1    14       PHILANTHROPISTS 2 (624)
-OLD MIL 7906                  1   0  0    14       FERMENTED (651)
-BULLSEYE 7839                 0   2  0     8       WASTED MONEY (648)
-KOONTS 7862                   0   1  0     5       BOOK STORE (650)
-HELPFUL HANK 7913             0   4  0     4       WEIRD STUDENTS (656)
-CROMWELL 7864                 0   1  0     1       BOOK STORE (650)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
FUZZY NAVEL 7910        0  1 0 FUR YOUR EYES ON 546 WURM KIN              740  NONE
ENGALS 7925             0  2 0 PHILANTHROPISTS  624 DESOLACE 7921         738   
MELLOW MANNY 7905       1  3 0 WEIRD STUDENTS 656   SOUL KITCHEN 7743     739   

                                     PERSONAL ADS

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

FUZZY NAVEL was butchered by WURM KIN in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
CHEETAH VON TEESE vanquished MAIN EVENT in a 1 minute uneven Title battle.
THIS CAMEL narrowly defeated ENEMY SABOTEUR in a 3 minute expert's fight.
RITA HAYBURNER devastated NOT POSITIVE in a exciting 1 minute bloody one-sided fight.
NO BEST viciously subdued PAMELA GANDERSON in a 3 minute gory duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -   0 -  0     100  |
|AIMED BLOW                       2         PARRY-STRIKE       5 -   4 -  0      56  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         AIMED BLOW        22 -  18 -  1      55  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         WALL OF STEEL      8 -   7 -  1      53  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         LUNGING ATTACK    31 -  29 -  1      52  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         STRIKING ATTACK   14 -  14 -  1      50  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  0         TOTAL PARRY        7 -  10 -  0      41  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  0         SLASHING ATTACK    4 -   7 -  0      36  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   0         BASHING ATTACK     6 -  12 -  3      33  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      0         PARRY-LUNGE        1 -   6 -  0      14  |

Turn 740 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

WALL OF STEEL      1 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  3         4  STRIKING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW         1 -  1     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0         3  AIMED BLOW     
                              PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
                              PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         1  WALL OF STEEL  
                              SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  0         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                              STRIKING ATTACK    0 -  0     
                              BASHING ATTACK     0 -  0     
                              TOTAL PARRY        0 -  0     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       CHEETAH VON TEESE 6298     16   6  0  101 FUR YOUR EYES ONLY (546)
WALL OF STEEL    THIS CAMEL 7710            18  16  0   86 STILLMATIC (630)

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   NOT POSITIVE 7844          12   3  0   56 STILLMATIC (630)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is RITA HAYBURNER 6580.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was THIS CAMEL 7710.  The ten other most popular fighters were RITA HAYBURNER 
6580, NO BEST 7846, CHEETAH VON TEESE 6298, PAMELA GANDERSON 7707, FUZZY NAVEL 7910, 
MAIN EVENT 7845, NOT POSITIVE 7844,  0,  0, and  0.

The least popular fighter this week was NOT POSITIVE 7844.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were MAIN EVENT 7845, FUZZY NAVEL 7910, PAMELA GANDERSON 7707, 
CHEETAH VON TEESE 6298, NO BEST 7846, RITA HAYBURNER 6580, THIS CAMEL 7710,  0,  0, 
and  0.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

KERN (36-7601) ORDER (635)
WHISKERS (36-6701) PORN IN A BARN (551)

                                CHALLENGES AND AVOIDS

To clarify:  You issue Challenges to warriors, but Avoid teams.  
To Challenge, write that warrior's name and ID# in the space provided. 
To Avoid, write the team's name and Team ID in that space. 
Make sure you include the ID!

                             * * * * *   MEMO  * * * * *

From:       The Office of Accurate Census Reporting, Gladiatorial Commission
To:         All Managers

In the interest of preserving our natural resources and preventing managerial writer's 
cramp, the census form has been eliminated, effective immediately.  Managers may 
register their warriors' races and/or favorite sayings by simply writing them on a 
separate piece of paper and submitting them to the Commission.  Each warrior may have 
up to 15 favorite sayings.  Each saying must be categorized Jeer, Gloat, Boredom, Ouch, 
Victory and may be up to 70 characters long.  For any questions, please contact the 
Gladiatorial Commission.