DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 08/17/2006    Duedate: 08/30/2006

CLIFFHOME ARENA

DM-38    TURN-505

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

ZIPPO
U.A.K. (92)
(38-4254) [14-8-0,122]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

ZIPPO                          POSITION IS EMPTY
U.A.K. (92)                    
(38-4254) [14-8-0,122]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

BALLOU YS                      BALLOU YS
JINDA-BAN (198)                JINDA-BAN (198)
(38-4539) [13-36-0,83]         (38-4539) [13-36-0,83]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

U.A.K. (92)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. BATTLE BLADES (420)         70
2. INQUISITION CLONES (416)    43      ARENA FELINES (374)
3. U.A.K. (92)                 22      Unchartered Team
4. ARENA FELINES (374)         14
5. JINDA-BAN (198)              2      THE ALTERNATIVE (195)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2 ARENA FELINES (374)      152  60 12 71.7   1/ 1 U.A.K. (92)              11  4 0
 2/ 1 INQUISITION CLONES (416)  20   8  2 71.4   2/ 3 INQUISITION CLONES (416)  6  3 0
 3/ 3 EAGLES CLAW (47)         673 573 56 54.0   3/ 4 EAGLES CLAW (47)          5  3 0
 4/ 0 BATTLE BLADES (420)       83  74  2 52.9   4/ 5 ARENA FELINES (374)       4  1 0
 5/ 4 U.A.K. (92)              282 266 16 51.5   5/ 2 JINDA-BAN (198)           3 11 0
 6/ 5 JINDA-BAN (198)          385 519  9 42.6   6/ 0 BATTLE BLADES (420)       2  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ A Dark and Stormy Night ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

     Lady Protector Runabout, a small horseless carriage graduated from Jinda-Ban,
crept forward slowly, mindful of the dangers of wet pavement.  The rain had reduced
visibility to the point where driving was unsafe, but it also provided a screen,
hiding her presence.  As long as she didn't hit the brakes and flash her tail lights,
she would be safe from observation.
     And being unobserved was important.  Her manager had banished her to the Isle of
the Eye, a place where the roads were bad and the traffic impossible.  Further than
that, he had appointed Lord Protector Dingil Bill to make sure she stayed there.  But
she had bribed a jehu to park in her garage and given him the slip.  At least, she
thought she had given him the slip, although she'd lately had the sense of headlights
that vanished from her mirror just as she turned her attention to them.  They'd been
set high off the ground and close together, just like Bill's.  If there had actually
been anyone behind her.  Maybe it was her imagination.  Or a chance reflection off
the rain-wet pavement.
     Or maybe not.
     Lights again, blinding in the mirror.  So bright!  What was Bill trying to do?
     No, not Bill--this was a triple light, three side by side by side.  Halogens,
almost red, low to the ground and coming fast.  Too fast for the road conditions, and
especially for this road:  there was a curve just ahead, and a drop-off on the
outside of the arc.  If that fool wasn't careful, someone would go through the
guardrail!
     Someone wanted her to go through the guardrail.
     Ha.
     And they said she was paranoid, did they?  But she had REAL enemies.  She'd
known that all along.
     She could hear the growl of a powerful engine coming up behind her.  More power
than she had, but with a little luck, she was more maneuverable, and she knew the
area (she hoped) better than her enemy.
     Runabout headed into the turn at reckless speed, then tapped the brakes and
skidded sideways, fishtailing on the flagstones, just grazed the guardrail, and
zoomed down the next stretch.
     Behind her the red lights veered and jerked sideways, and something large and
dark went off the road.

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Didn't want to disappoint Ballou Ys again by not having a DM column.  Welcome back to
Garfield and Talon's warriors.  The ranks were getting a little thin.  Now there are
more warriors in line to challenge me than there are initiates in the arena.
Hopefully with all of these fine warriors at the top I can survive and win one more
fight which should mean I'll receive my invite.  Not that I am worthy but it seems I
have quite a few of these Political Points from being DM way before I should have.
Paws, you get my challenge this turn, seems I match up well with you.

Until next turn,
Zippo

                                      SPY REPORT

     Busy, busy, busy, lots of things happening in CLIFFHOME this turn, and let's 
start with a look at some of the teams.  And let's see, SCROD BOY fought FUZZY BUNNY 
SLIPPERS and gained 27 points and contributed to INQUISITION CLONES' 2-1-0.  FUZZY 
BUNNY SLIPPERS has lost to SCROD BOY, falling 24 points, while helping make EAGLES 
CLAW a 2-3-0 turn.  Well done, CLIFFHOME, the Duelmaster was this turn's most 
challenged warrior.  Perhaps ZIPPO is not as thrilled, being challenged 3 times.  
ROBERT GERMAN challenged for the Duelmastership this turn, attempting to dethrone 
U.A.K.'s warrior.  The attempts to dethrone the Duelmaster have failed, and ZIPPO 
remains CLIFFHOME's top warrior for another turn.  Can someone confirm a rumor for 
me?  I hear the top team makes their losing fighters do dishes at The Choking Ogre 
until they win.  Maybe?   
     The crowd's roar, the smell of iron and leather, mixed with sweat, what more 
could a warrior ask of life?  Well, besides that.  NICKELBACK of EAGLES CLAW had 
better have a good reason for challenging down 10 points in a challenge which he won. 
I thought NICKELBACK showed great skill and promise when he defeated BENT FENDER.  
All right, so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     The Dark Arena is for those who cannot win, not who cannot lose with grace.  
Dignity in life or death is the warrior's creed.  Is it really true that CLIFFHOME 
has more dishwashers per capita that fighters?  Just thought I'd ask...   
     I like this place, CLIFFHOME, the taverns have old wine, and young serving 
girls.  Who could ask for more?  Well, I'm burning daylight here in CLIFFHOME and 
I've a long road ahead of me.  Happy Trails.  Until the sun next rises and my pen 
sets to paper-- Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ZIPPO 4254                   14   8  0   122       U.A.K. (92)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PAWS 4342                    17   9  2   103       ARENA FELINES (374)
 SIR LICKSALOT 4341           24   4  0    98       ARENA FELINES (374)
-LEE LEE LO LEE 4653           6   0  2    93       INQUISITION CLONES (416)
-HELLO KITTY 4600             13   5  0    91       ARENA FELINES (374)
 ROBERT GERMAN 4521            9   3  1    91       EAGLES CLAW (47)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BALLOU YS 4539               13  36  0    83       JINDA-BAN (198)
 CPT. CRUNCH 4244             11  12  2    83       U.A.K. (92)
-FRZNGRMDBEEFPATTIES 4652      5   2  0    82       INQUISITION CLONES (416)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 AVERAGE JOE 4677              6   0  0    51       U.A.K. (92)
 SCROD BOY 4675                3   4  0    51       INQUISITION CLONES (416)
 THWDGRNDBEEFPATTIES 4651      4   0  0    43       INQUISITION CLONES (416)
 POULAN 4331                   6   6  1    36       U.A.K. (92)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-FRANKEN FELINE 4399           2   0  0    32       ARENA FELINES (374)
 FUZZY BUNNY SLIPPERS 4549     4   1  0    28       EAGLES CLAW (47)
 RUNNA DAMILL 4676             3   3  0    26       U.A.K. (92)
 NICKELBACK 4567               2   0  0    26       EAGLES CLAW (47)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DA9965439564 4650             1   2  0    23       INQUISITION CLONES (416)
 BERANNE 4697                  1   0  0    21       BATTLE BLADES (420)
 LOMBER BOS 4670               5   5  0    20       JINDA-BAN (198)
 TERDA 4700                    1   0  0    19       BATTLE BLADES (420)
 RIQUETTIE 4672                4   6  0    18       JINDA-BAN (198)
 MALEVOLENCE 4569              1   0  0    11       EAGLES CLAW (47)
 SWITCHFOOT 4568               0   1  0     7       EAGLES CLAW (47)
 DASHER 4685                   1   2  0     5       JINDA-BAN (198)
 BENT FENDER 4702              1   1  0     4       JINDA-BAN (198)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
DEXDOZ 4699            0  1 0 BATTLE BLADES 420     ARENAMASTER ERLYAI 23 505 NONE    
CALDOZ 4698            0  1 0 BATTLE BLADES 420     DARK CHAMPION 24      505 NONE    
ELTER 4701             0  1 0 BATTLE BLADES 420     MOUNTAIN TROLL 18     505 NONE    
ARTICULATE LORI 4620  14  9 1 JINDA-BAN 198         LEE LEE LO LEE 4653   502         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Robert German -- Yikes!  I won't get those bloodstains out in a hurry.  Next time,
just use your weapon and not your claw. -- Ballou Ys

Average Joe -- You keep SAYING that, but I can TELL you aren't average.  You're one
of those disgusting "superior specimens."  I hate that in a man.  It makes it so HARD
to feel superior to him. -- Riquettie

Thwdgrndbeefpatties -- And what a mess you are, too!  Oozing all over, and not really
an appealing color.  Or smell.  I think you've got freezer burn. -- Lomber Bos

Nickelback -- Huh, you probably got a whole QUARTER back out of me.  Ouch. -- Dasher

I curl my bumper in scorn at this "Mordant Deserter."  I will flatten him, if he'll
just stand still long enough.  He will be mud beneath my wheels! -- Bent Fender the
bloodthirsty
P.S.  Besides, he didn't teach me anything worth knowing.

11 August 2006
All -- I support Vendetta Cartel's observation of The Dark Knights!  If war is
declared on V.C. by The Dark Knights, then war is also declared on The Dark Knights
of the Desolate Empire by The Avengers of Light!  We have been quietly awaiting such
a chance to expose ourselves (all interested parties contact me c/o The Barbarians:
DM 31, Attn: Timothias)!  Come, Vendetta Cartel, let us show these broke-down
"Knights" what true warriors are! -- Gemini Goldphoenix, Overlord of The Avengers of
Light

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DEXDOZ was butchered by ARENAMASTER ERLYAIN in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
CALDOZ was dispatched by DARK CHAMPION in a 2 minute gruesome Dark Arena battle.
ELTER was killed by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
ROBERT GERMAN lost to ZIPPO in a 1 minute Challenge Title brawl.
PAWS devastated CPT. CRUNCH in a exciting 1 minute bloody one-sided Challenge fight.
NICKELBACK devastated BENT FENDER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
SIR LICKSALOT unbelievably bested BALLOU YS in a 4 minute master's match.
AVERAGE JOE handily defeated DA9965439564 in a 1 minute uneven melee.
FUZZY BUNNY SLIPPERS was vanquished by SCROD BOY in a 2 minute one-sided duel.
POULAN won victory over LOMBER BOS in a 2 minute duel.
THWDGRNDBEEFPATTIES defeated THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a exciting 2 minute fight.
RUNNA DAMILL handily defeated RIQUETTIE in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
DASHER was subdued by MALEVOLENCE in a 2 minute amateur's match.
BERANNE handily defeated SWITCHFOOT in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
TERDA demolished CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided brawl.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|AIMED BLOW                       6         PARRY-LUNGE        1 -   0 -  0     100  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  5         TOTAL PARRY        4 -   1 -  0      80  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         STRIKING ATTACK   14 -   4 -  3      78  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         LUNGING ATTACK    24 -  14 -  0      63  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         SLASHING ATTACK    9 -   7 -  0      56  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      2         WALL OF STEEL      5 -   5 -  1      50  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         AIMED BLOW        14 -  16 -  1      47  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    1         BASHING ATTACK     9 -  16 -  0      36  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     0         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    0         PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -   0 -  0       0  |

Turn 505 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         2 -  4         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  0     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  0         3  STRIKING ATTACK
STRIKING ATTACK    2 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  0         2  BASHING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    3 -  2     BASHING ATTACK     0 -  3         1  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  2                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        1 -  1                                       1  AIMED BLOW     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   ZIPPO 4254                 14   8  0  122 U.A.K. (92)
STRIKING ATTACK  PAWS 4342                  17   9  2  103 ARENA FELINES (374)
TOTAL PARRY      SIR LICKSALOT 4341         24   4  0   98 ARENA FELINES (374)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is BALLOU YS 4539.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was BALLOU YS 4539.  The ten other most popular fighters were THWDGRNDBEEFPATTIES 
4651, DASHER 4685, PAWS 4342, SCROD BOY 4675, POULAN 4331, CALDOZ 4698, ZIPPO 4254, 
NICKELBACK 4567, SIR LICKSALOT 4341, and AVERAGE JOE 4677.

The least popular fighter this week was SWITCHFOOT 4568.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were RIQUETTIE 4672, DA9965439564 4650, BENT FENDER 4702, DEXDOZ 4699, TERDA 
4700, LOMBER BOS 4670, CPT. CRUNCH 4244, ROBERT GERMAN 4521, ELTER 4701, and BERANNE 
4697.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

ZIPPO (38-4254) U.A.K. (92)