DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER

Date   : 01/03/2004    Duedate: 01/30/2004

XOCHITHLAN ARENA

DM-39    TURN-190

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

ZOOLANDER
WITLESS WONDERS (419)
(39-3523) [11-6-1,130]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

ZOOLANDER                      EYE RAISE
WITLESS WONDERS (419)          CHEAP SHOTS (426)
(39-3523) [11-6-1,130]         (39-3604) [5-0-0,33]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

MYRON NAGEL                    PANTHER
THE MIDDLE WAY (385)           THE CATS (427)
(39-3316) [23-19-0,88]         (39-3618) [0-3-0,3]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

CHEAP SHOTS (426)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)      39
2. OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)        34      CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)
3. WITLESS WONDERS (419)       20      Unchartered Team
4. BLUE DIAMONDS (237)         11
5. FIVE FELINES (190)          10      CHEAP SHOTS (426)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*CHEAP SHOTS (426)         19   3  0 86.4   1/ 1*CHEAP SHOTS (426)        10  2 0
 2/ 2 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)   130  76  7 63.1   2/ 2 WITLESS WONDERS (419)     8  1 0
 3/ 3 WITLESS WONDERS (419)     37  25  1 59.7   3/ 5*FIVE FELINES (190)        7  3 0
 4/ 5 OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)     133 104  6 56.1   4/ 3 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)    7  8 0
 5- 6 DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)    115  97  9 54.2   5/ 7 ATMAN PROJECT (391)       5 10 1
 6/ 8 BLUE DIAMONDS (237)       29  31  4 48.3   6/ 8 BLUE DIAMONDS (237)       3  0 1
 7/ 7 THE MIDDLE WAY (385)     123 141  5 46.6   7/11 OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)      3  2 0
 8/ 9*FIVE FELINES (190)        20  25  1 44.4   8/ 6 THE MIDDLE WAY (385)      3 12 0
 9/11 ATMAN PROJECT (391)       32  47  2 40.5   9- 4 DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)     2  3 0
10/10 THE CATS (427)            25  37  3 40.3  10/ 9 THE CATS (427)            1  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Dark Federation #2 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Jhans:

     "That is a fight you cannot win, Princess Morra," Chancellor Ethylbyrr said.  He
leaned forward to emphasize his point, one hand on the report that had sparked the
discussion.  "It is better not to enter a battle you cannot win."
     "Darron wouldn't--"
     "Princess, your brother is no longer a boy, he is a young man now," the old man
said.  "He will not be pleased to receive...advice from his older sister, much less
commands.  Even without his new friends, he would be reluctant to--"
     "All right, you've made your point."  She looked away.  Looked out the window
across the city of Jhans, but she didn't really see it.  Didn't want to see it, if
the truth be told.  She was surprised to realize that what she really wanted to see
at this moment was her husband, Gryzash the Golden.  She had not felt strongly about
him one way or the other, theirs had been a marriage of political expediency.  But
Gryzash was--had been--a confident, decisive man.  One whose very presence would awe
these quarreling nobles of Jhans into obedience.  Unfortunately, Gryzash was dead.
Her thoughts shifted briefly to their son, Gorris.  She might have stayed in Jhans to
fight the treacherous 'advisors' of her brother, except...it was her first duty to
protect her son and defend HIS heritage.  Let Prince Darron worry about Jhans now.
It was time for her to leave him to it, for good or ill.
     "I must take Gorris to Sibikhas," she said finally.  "That is where my duty lies
now.  That city is his to rule, by rights, but it is easier to hold onto power than
to win it back after it's been lost.  Will you stay here and advise Darron?"
     Ethylbyrr laughed sadly and shook his head.  "The boy--the young man--wouldn't
have me," he said.  "His new friends won't want to share the influence, and...I am a
reminder of his youth.  Which he would prefer to forget as he strives to become a man
in his own eyes."
     "If you remain in Jhans without a royal post, your life won't be worth--"
     "It will be worth nothing at all," the old man said.  "I will be dead by the
time you clear the city's gates."
     She nodded.  There was no mercy in the Delarquan Federation for someone who fell
from power.  "Come with me to Sibikhas, then.  It would be a shame to waste your wit
and experience, old friend."
     The old man half rose from his seat across the table and bowed.  "I would be
honored to serve you in Sibikhas or elsewhere, Princess."  Seating himself again, he
said, "But you cannot simply decide to leave Jhans and then go.  You will need, at
the very least, bodyguards.  The Jhans Royal Guard you cannot take with you--they
belong here and will provide some protection from Darron, if he does not run
completely mad and dismiss them.  So you will need--"
     "Gladiators," she said firmly.  "Two or three, at least, as many as half a dozen
perhaps.  They are--"
     "They are crude men, for the most part," Ethylbyrr protested.
     "So?  They are less likely than any others to have political axes of their own
to grind.  I will have gladiators for bodyguards."  She grimaced.  "I will need
them."

This is a call for volunteers.  A personal, or an email to Livia@reality.com will do
it.

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Dark Federation #3 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Rodeki:

     "Princess?  I didn't know she was a princess," Tolugat muttered.  "Princess
Tirisha?  This changes everything!"
     "Yeah."  Adabemis & Balmador nodded with satisfaction.  "This gives us, you
know, whatchit.  Not just a back-street cult.  We've got a princess."
     "She'll be picky," the priest objected.  "She'll want velvet cushions to kneel
on.  Good wine.  All that fancy stuff we can't afford--"
     "Hey, it makes a good show!" the gladiator protested.  "People like a good show.
Velvet cushions, okay, maybe not, but we have to have good wine.  And blood
sacrifices.  Lots of them."  His eyes glittered.  "Lots of blood...."
     Tolugat began to look uneasy.  "That could attract unfavorable attention.
Rulers don't like that, they shut down cults that do a lot of sacrificing, they--"
     "But Princess Tirisha's going to be the ruler," the gladiator pointed out.
"She's one of us.  She's on OUR side.  She LIKES a good bloody cult, I can tell."  He
grinned, the glitter in his eye becoming more pronounced.
     "Oh.  Oh, of course," the priest said faintly.  "Why didn't I think of that...."
     "And we'll have lots of gladiators," Adabemis & Balmador went on.  "Gladiators
like blood, too.  Gladiators are INTO dark cults, after all.  It'll be great!"
     "Right... great.  Of course," Tolugat muttered.  "Lots of...," he swallowed
hard, "lots of blood."

Mordant, the royal palace:

     Talissen, Queen of Mordant, threw down the spy's report and glared across the
breakfast table at her husband, King Samir of Trocar.  "You see!  I told you that if
we didn't deal with Sibikhas and Rodeki, there would be trouble."
     Samir shrugged and cut himself another slice of ham.  "If it gets out of hand,
you can crack down on things, but I like the idea of letting the contenders for
Overlord of Sibikhas fight it out among themselves.  Fewer discontented challengers
left around to make trouble later."
     "And I told you I thought it was a bad idea, on several counts," she snapped
back.  "That kind of chaos is not good for the nation, in the first place.  Second,
the winner could end up being TOO strong, and everyone knowing it.  Third, it ignores
the legal solution, that Morra of Jhans, as Gryzash's wife, should be regent until
his son is old enough to take the rule--"
     "She's got experience at being a regent," Samir remarked, frowning thoughtfully.
"Rather convenient, isn't it, that just when her job ends in Jhans, here comes
another one in Sibikhas...."
     "Coincidences DO happen sometimes.  That's why we have a name for them," the
Queen replied.  "And the fourth reason is that if there is to be some new rulers
among my vassals, *I* should be the one to choose them."
     "That's the best reason," Samir agreed.  He shrugged again.  "So choose one.
But if it isn't someone with the strength to defend the position, you'll have to
commit YOUR army to supporting him.  And if your army's not at home, then you could
be vulnerable."
     After a moment's thoughtful silence, Talissen said, "I need more information.
And I need some warriors to be bodyguards for whoever I do choose.  Gladiators, I
think.  Very useful people, gladiators."

This is a call for volunteers.  A personal, or an email to Livia@reality.com will do
it.

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 485): WISPER of SWEORDMASTERS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 371): BIG RED of BIG COUNTRY (Wally The Wacko, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 490): MARY RETZLAFF of AMERICAN APPRAISAL (?, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 486): LYSISTRATA of DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 485): SUX0R of MORE NEW TEAMS 2 (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 489): SPONGEBOB of BATTLE BEASTS (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 487): RAISON D'ETRE of BATHTUB ARMADA (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 481): AERYN SUN of FARSCAPE (Keldon Blackfang, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 473): CADEX CFM of THE BIKE SHOP (Malaquar, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 472): TSUNAMI of STORM WARNING (Abarsis, the Slaughter Priest)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 446): MAC of BLITZKRIEG (Polarius, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 437): NUTCRACKER of ALL FINESSE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 189): ZOOLANDER of WITLESS WONDERS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 423): SNAPPY GEORGE of COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 372): DROGOI of DARK HORSEMEN (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 176): RUBBER BULLET of USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 164): MACAULIFFE of THE EXPLORERS (Kellog, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 321): BLACK WIDOW of SLAUGHTERHOUSE 5 (Soultaker, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 141): 2 PHAT of VERMIN (Sultan, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 365): MAUI WAUI of TACO GODS from ZENSU (The Sentinel, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 485): SOUL HAREM (Saucy Jack, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 371): BIG COUNTRY (Wally The Wacko, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 490): SIMPLY DESSERTS (Sweet Tooth, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 486): DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 485): I'M HISTORY (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 489): DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 487): NINJAS (Shocking Toad, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 481): THE MENTORS (Dr. Feelgood, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 473): BIG MEAN FISH (Big Wave Dave, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 472): RAGE (Myrrdin, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 446): BLITZKRIEG (Polarius, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 437): EAGLES CLAW (Talon Volksie, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 189): CHEAP SHOTS (?, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 423): COLOR ME SUAVE (Suave, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 372): ALL-UGLY TEAM (The Sentinel, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 176): DREIHDENWALD (Dreihdenflahg, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 164): THE EXPLORERS (Kellog, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 321): SAMURAI KIDS II (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 141): EPOCHOLYPSE (Brewmaster, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 365): DARK PANTHEON (Doc Steele, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 370): MORADOR of RESURRECTION (Shocking Toad, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 489): GO FISH of GAMES LIBRARY (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 486): LYSISTRATA of DOGS OF WAR (Nick, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 485): AUTOMATON of TECHNOLOGY (Otto X. Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 488): IVANMOE of SOUL STRIPPERS II (Saucy Jack, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 487): ALOHA ALICE of BEACH BABES (Nick, mgr.)
                           BUBBA of MORGAN'S BOYS (A-Sop, mgr.)
               (turn 486): POPCORN MACHINE of WASTELAND II (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
                           SATOSHI KUNO of NINJAS (Shocking Toad, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 481): KEPLER of THE MOONDOGS (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 473): VIGO of ALCHEMY (Otto X. Frothingslosh, mgr.)
                (turn 472): PROVIDENCE of SUPERIOR FORCES 6N (Manager, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 437): 2 + 2 = 4 of JUST BECAUSE (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 175): BIRAN of THE WHITE COMPANY (Silverstroke, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 163): LUCIA of ISLANDERS (Nick, mgr.)
                          GHASTLY MIGRAINE of HANGOVERS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 321): BLACK WIDOW of SLAUGHTERHOUSE 5 (Soultaker, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings, warriors of XOCHITHLAN!  Once again I've been called out of 
retirement for my abilities and insights into Spyreporting.  Hmmmph!  I always 
thought DUCKS UNLIMITED was an over-rated team and they proved it with a 0-0-0!  Up 
'n down.  Up 'n down.  Rankings always change.  Up 'n down.  I think I'm gonna be...  
Well, OPHIDIAN ORDER's 7th moved them up to 3-1-0 place.  It seems so recently people 
were saying WITLESS WONDERS was washed up, finished.  But 3-0-0 moved them up 0.  I 
guess they're washed no more...  What's with LAHRS ENNY?  He actually beat THE MIDDLE 
WAY's MYRON NAGEL, and walked away with 16 more points from the fight.  Laughs were 
big at WITLESS WONDERS while they watched DAMOK clobber LUMINOUS NIGHT.  He lost 9 
points and got bruised from objects thrown from the stands.  Try as he might, TIGER 
wasn't good enough at persuading ZOOLANDER to step down from the Duelmaster's 
throne...  Wouldn't it be nice to have live subjects to practice on?  I hear some 
team is looking into the uses of convicted prisoners.   
     If at first you don't succeed, avoid.  That'll get you in the Spyreports.  The 
most avoided team was THE MIDDLE WAY.  The bums at CHEAP SHOTS couldn't face the 
challenges from THE MIDDLE WAY!  No excuse for that!  How well I know the feeling of 
being the most challenged warrior, SHIFTING LION!  Don't make idle boasts, they may 
come back to haunt you.  EYE RAISE expects the easy win by going 24 points down.  GIB 
HOLGIN will find this a hard lesson!  EYE RAISE bested GIB HOLGIN.  I bet EYE RAISE 
could beat two-year-olds, too.  Well, THE MIDDLE WAY knows who to set their sights 
on.  LATE KNIGHT didn't quite know what to make of a challenge he received from 
WARRIOR NO of ATMAN PROJECT, who is 19 points below him.  WARRIOR NO perhaps got his 
just desserts, seeing as he was bested by LATE KNIGHT and ended up with 12 
recognition points.   
     There have been some calls to lengthen the time limit.  Do you want the fighters 
to walk away, or not?  CRIMINAL ELEMENT's boys should be laying low.  Now that 
CRIMINAL ELEMENT's manager has gone and let ZOOLANDER kill BERG, LORI unchallenged, 
CRIMINAL ELEMENT's fighters are fair game.  Here's some advice:  study your opponent, 
master many skills, fight dirty.   
     Many other cities have retirement homes for aged warriors.  Any plans here?  
XOCHITHLAN is a nice place to live, but I don't like to live in nice places.  
Remember--a good fighter needs both good skills and good luck.  Until next time,-- 
Olaf Modeen  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ZOOLANDER 3523               11   6  1   130       WITLESS WONDERS (419)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-MISS CON DUCK 2344           16  15  1   108       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
 LAHRS ENNY 3400              15  10  0    99       CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)
 TAMMY FAYE 3520              12   5  0    99       WITLESS WONDERS (419)
 TIGER 3629                    9   6  0    93       THE CATS (427)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-DUCK TAPE 3283               10   9  2    90       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
 MYRON NAGEL 3316             23  19  0    88       THE MIDDLE WAY (385)
 DAMOK 3538                    9   8  0    74       WITLESS WONDERS (419)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MYSTI MIENER 3578             7   5  1    60       CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LUMINOUS NIGHT 3340           8  10  1    54       ATMAN PROJECT (391)
 SILVERTOOTH 3360              7   3  2    51       BLUE DIAMONDS (237)
-ANACONDA 3382                 7   2  0    50       OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)
-HOT AIR DUCK 3451             8   5  0    45       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
 HOMEY CIDE 3594               6   3  1    42       CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)
-SKULK 3603                    3   0  0    42       CHEAP SHOTS (426)
 LATE KNIGHT 3359              5   5  1    39       BLUE DIAMONDS (237)
 BLACK ADDER 3373              7   3  0    38       OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)
 ULRIK VORN 3556               9   8  0    35       THE MIDDLE WAY (385)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 EYE RAISE 3604                5   0  0    33       CHEAP SHOTS (426)
-SMIRK 3606                    3   1  0    33       CHEAP SHOTS (426)
-IRONWOLF 1845                 5   9  0    30       BLUE DIAMONDS (237)
-QUICKSTRIKE 3380              6   4  0    29       BLUE DIAMONDS (237)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 IGNORE 3605                   4   1  0    29       CHEAP SHOTS (426)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SHIFTING LION 3427            4   1  1    23       ATMAN PROJECT (391)
 CHUCKLE 3602                  4   1  0    21       CHEAP SHOTS (426)
 PROUD PANTHER 1454            3   4  0    21       FIVE FELINES (190)
 BIG BOBCAT 3614               2   0  0    13       FIVE FELINES (190)
 PYTHON 3608                   1   0  0    13       OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)
 SEA SNAKE 3609                1   0  0    13       OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)
 WARRIOR NO 3417               3   3  0    12       ATMAN PROJECT (391)
-DUCK A L'ORANGE 3607          0   4  0    12       DUCKS UNLIMITED (143)
 LARGE LYNX 3613               2   0  0    10       FIVE FELINES (190)
 A. SALT 3610                  1   2  0    10       CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)
 STREET SCUM 3633              1   1  0     9       CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)
 CUNNING COUGAR 3615           1   1  0     8       FIVE FELINES (190)
 BOA 3595                      1   3  0     6       OPHIDIAN ORDER (328)
 GIB HOLGIN 3611               1   3  0     6       THE MIDDLE WAY (385)
 SPOKEN SECRET 3634            1   0  0     6       ATMAN PROJECT (391)
 JUST JAGUAR 3616              1   1  0     6       FIVE FELINES (190)
 YOLANA X 3631                 1   2  0     5       THE MIDDLE WAY (385)
 COCONUT COOLY 3428            0   5  0     5       ATMAN PROJECT (391)
 PANTHER 3618                  0   3  0     3       THE CATS (427)
-TYSON 3592                    0   1  0     1       WITLESS WONDERS (419)
 QUIA RAYNE 3636               0   1  0     1       THE MIDDLE WAY (385)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
BERG, LORI 3554        8  4 1 CRIMINAL ELEMENT 379  ZOOLANDER 3523        186 NOT REVE
SELA TIMM 3537         9  9 0 THE MIDDLE WAY 385    LUMINOUS NIGHT 3340   189         
WALLEN YO 3576         5  6 0 THE MIDDLE WAY 385    HOMEY CIDE 3594       187 REVENGED

                                     PERSONAL ADS

A Witless Wonder for Duelmaster!  Woo, woo, Xochithlan!  Gotta love it!  So cheap! --
All Us Cheap Shots

Ducks and Crip -- Sorry to see you go.  We had some really, really cheap stuff lined
up for you. -- Us conniving Cheap Shots

Gilo Holgin -- And there was more where that came from, Bud! -- Eye Raise

Shifting Lion -- Perhaps you needed a little less shift, and a whole lot more Lion?
I enjoyed it immensely, nonetheless. -- Smirk

Yolana X -- How's that for putting you in the middle?  Since I couldn't possibly
ignore you, I decided to have a Merry Christmas and have my way with you.  Happy
Holidays! -- Ignore

A. Salt -- Oh, gee, that was just too bad. -- Chuckle

All -- May the peace and prosperity of The New Year be forever lost to you and yours.
-- The Cheap Shots

Luminous Night -- You do realize what you have unleashed?  You kill an elf under a
full moon, you turn loose a very dangerous spirit.  VERY dangerous. -- Ghost of Sela
Timm

Eye Raise -- That was a damned cheap shot, man!  Er, golem! -- Gib Holgin

Zoolander -- So why did you bring your whole zoo, huh?  And why did Arenamaster
Xoron, curse him, LET you? -- Myron Nagel

Damok -- Because you taught me well, I will forgive you your victory--this time.  But
next time, you lose. -- Ulrik Vorn
P.S.  Or else.

Ignore -- I'd like to. -- Yolana X

Crip -- I sympathize with you, if that is what is called for, regarding the Canadian
winter.  I just wish you hadn't exported it. -- Nick, The Middle Way

8 December 2003
Greetings!  I would like to invite everyone to Jhans (DM 36) for the first annual kLk
St. Valentine's Day Massacre (kill contest).  We will start the contest off with the
ceremonial burning of the Andorian flag on turn 450.  (Six turns away.  Roughly mid-
February.)  The contest will run for 10 turns.  On turn 461, 3 separate victors will
be announced.  Team with the most kills, warrior with the most kills, and alliance
with the most kills.  Prizes will be awarded to the manager of the team with the most
kills and to the manager of the warrior with the most kills.  The prizes will
probably be team roll-ups.  The number of roll-ups has yet to be determined.  The
contest is sponsored by Jhans' newest, (but by the time the contest starts) largest
alliance, the kLk (pronounced "klick"). -- Polarius, mgr. of Blitzkrieg DM 36

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

LAHRS ENNY devastated MYRON NAGEL in a 1 minute gruesome mismatched Challenge fight.
LUMINOUS NIGHT was demolished by DAMOK in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
HOMEY CIDE savagely defeated ULRIK VORN in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Challenge duel.
EYE RAISE overpowered GIB HOLGIN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight.
WARRIOR NO was devastated by LATE KNIGHT in a 1 minute uneven Challenge brawl.
A. SALT defeated YOLANA X in a 4 minute novice's Challenge struggle.
BIG BOBCAT bested COCONUT COOLY in a 1 minute novice's Challenge competition.
LARGE LYNX won victory over BOA in a 2 minute beginner's Challenge duel.
JUST JAGUAR was vanquished by SHIFTING LION in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
ZOOLANDER defeated TIGER in a 1 minute Title fight.
TAMMY FAYE overpowered ELITE ASSASSIN in a 2 minute gory one-sided melee.
MYSTI MIENER was subdued by COLLABORATOR in a crowd pleasing 1 minute bloody match.
SILVERTOOTH viciously subdued IGNORE in a exciting 4 minute bloody battle.
BLACK ADDER beat PROUD PANTHER in a 3 minute conflict.
CHUCKLE unbelievably bested CUNNING COUGAR in a 5 minute gruesome fight.
PANTHER was luckily beaten by STREET SCUM in a 8 minute beginner's struggle.
SEA SNAKE devastated RIRORNI LOOTER in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
PYTHON overpowered RIRORNI LOOTER in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
SPOKEN SECRET beat QUIA RAYNE in a 2 minute gory novice's bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                  6         TOTAL PARRY       15 -   5 -  0      75  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         STRIKING ATTACK   28 -  21 -  1      57  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      5         BASHING ATTACK    18 -  14 -  1      56  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         PARRY-RIPOSTE     10 -   8 -  1      56  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         LUNGING ATTACK    19 -  17 -  0      53  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         WALL OF STEEL     17 -  16 -  1      52  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   3         PARRY-LUNGE        9 -  10 -  0      47  |
|AIMED BLOW                       2         PARRY-STRIKE      14 -  16 -  2      47  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         SLASHING ATTACK   10 -  13 -  1      43  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         AIMED BLOW         2 -   4 -  0      33  |

Turn 190 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

BASHING ATTACK     3 -  0     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  2         3  STRIKING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL      4 -  1     LUNGING ATTACK     0 -  3         3  PARRY-STRIKE   
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    0 -  2         2  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  1                                       1  PARRY-LUNGE    
TOTAL PARRY        3 -  2                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
AIMED BLOW         1 -  1                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  3     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  ZOOLANDER 3523             11   6  1  130 WITLESS WONDERS (419)
PARRY-STRIKE     LAHRS ENNY 3400            15  10  0   99 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)
PARRY-LUNGE      MYRON NAGEL 3316           23  19  0   88 THE MIDDLE WAY (385)
BASHING ATTACK   DAMOK 3538                  9   8  0   74 WITLESS WONDERS (419)
SLASHING ATTACK  MYSTI MIENER 3578           7   5  1   60 CRIMINAL ELEMENT (379)
WALL OF STEEL    SILVERTOOTH 3360            7   3  2   51 BLUE DIAMONDS (237)
LUNGING ATTACK   ULRIK VORN 3556             9   8  0   35 THE MIDDLE WAY (385)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is MYRON NAGEL 3316.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was PANTHER 3618.  The ten other most popular fighters were SILVERTOOTH 3360, 
HOMEY CIDE 3594, ULRIK VORN 3556, TAMMY FAYE 3520, CUNNING COUGAR 3615, BOA 3595, 
BLACK ADDER 3373, SPOKEN SECRET 3634, LAHRS ENNY 3400, and YOLANA X 3631.

The least popular fighter this week was STREET SCUM 3633.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were CHUCKLE 3602, IGNORE 3605, JUST JAGUAR 3616, A. SALT 3610, 
WARRIOR NO 3417, LUMINOUS NIGHT 3340, MYRON NAGEL 3316, PYTHON 3608, SEA SNAKE 3609, 
and PROUD PANTHER 1454.

                       TOURNEY FREEZE CHANGE -- ADVANCE NOTICE

     Beginning at the Winter Face-to-Face in Tempe (January 2004), we will implement 
several changes affecting tournaments.  The tournament announcement for the upcoming 
FTF and future tourneys will reflect these changes.
     First, we will eliminate the tourney freeze for all regular DM warrior classes.  
Regular DM warriors will not be classed ahead of the tournament, but instead will 
fight according to their FE on the date of the tourney.  There will still be a freeze 
for the ADM classes, occurring on the same timeline as before, approximately 6 weeks 
before the tournament.
     In addition to the above change, the warrior classes will be slightly altered.  
The new tourney classes will be as follows:

                DM Tourney Classes                 ADM Tourney Classes
              ======================              ======================
                  0 FE:  Rookies                        Freshmen
                1-4 FE:  Apprentices                    ADM
               5-10 FE:  Initiates                      Eligibles
              11-20 FE:  Adepts                      ---induction---
              21-30 FE:  Champions                      Contenders
                31+ FE:  Challengers                    Primus

     All regular DM tourney classes will remain solely FE based.  All ADM classes will 
now be based on warrior characteristics (i.e., the ADM split algorithm), including the 
Freshmen class.
     The Gateway and Primus arenas will be merging before the FTF to form one top 
arena.  These warriors will be split into two tournament classes, the Contenders and 
the Primus classes, again based upon their characteristics.  More information on this 
will be published in the newsletters for those arenas.
     If you have any questions about the above changes, please contact Customer 
Service.  Good luck in your games.

                                          -- Green Eyes and the RSI staff