Date   : 05/16/2003    Duedate: 05/29/2003


DM-40    TURN-414

This Weeks Top Honors


(40-3921) [11-3-0,111]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

BIRDBRAIN                      POSITION IS EMPTY
WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)          
(40-3921) [11-3-0,111]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

TERIS                          SIANNA
BEYOND THE PALE (337)          BEYOND THE PALE (337)
(40-3895) [11-15-1,49]         (40-3914) [12-7-0,52]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. CARNIVAL (379)              48
2. WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)       19      CARNIVAL (379)
3. BEYOND THE PALE (337)       19      Unchartered Team
4. RELIGIOUS HERALD (306)       0
5. SUNNYLAND (382)             -3       (79)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2 CARNIVAL (379)            59  39  2 60.2   1/ 3 CARNIVAL (379)           10  5 0
 2/ 4 WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)    305 236 16 56.4   2/ 1 WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)     8  7 0
 3/ 3 THAT 80'S METAL (394)     51  40  1 56.0   3/ 2 THAT 80'S METAL (394)     6  3 0
 4- 5 RELIGIOUS HERALD (306)    20  25  2 44.4   4/ 4 SUNNYLAND (382)           4  2 0
 5/ 7 BEYOND THE PALE (337)    269 404  7 40.0   5/ 5 BEYOND THE PALE (337)     3 12 0
 6/ 6 SUNNYLAND (382)           15  24  1 38.5   6- 6 RELIGIOUS HERALD (306)    1  0 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

           + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Andorians Abroad #6 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +


     Tankesh didn't waste time cursing, he had a decision to make, and fast:  fight 
or flight.  He could take the two men that were supposed to "teach him better 
manners," and their captain and the rest of his men as well, come to that.  He wanted 
to.  But would it forward his mission, which was to get into the Kashka, kill the 
traitor, restore Kasarya to her rightful position, make sure the Andorian League came 
out of the whole mess looking good, and get out safely himself?  Or run, change his 
appearance yet again, and try a different approach?  Prudence said he should run, but 
he didn't want to.
     "You leave him alone!" Kasarya screeched.
     Tankesh half sighed, half grinned.  That would do it!  No guard liked taking 
orders from a civilian, and damned few Karnhorns could bear to take orders from a 
woman, and then when you throw in the apparent difference in class....  He turned, 
dropping into a hand-to-hand fighting stance.  No point in killing these men if he 
didn't have to; they were just doing their jobs.
     Party of five, two men dismounted and carrying clubs.  Okay, clubs he would 
fight bare-handed until he could grab one and turn it on the other.  But if either 
one drew a sword, they were dead men.  He feinted to the left, wove right, and then 
darted toward the left-hand man and grappled briefly, seizing his club in time to 
turn and parry the other fellow.  The right-hand man staggered a little when his blow 
met unexpected resistance, but he recovered fast.  So did the one Tankesh had 
disarmed, grabbing him from behind in a bear hug.  Tankesh slammed his head back, 
butting the bear-hugger in the face, stamped on the man's foot, and twisted free.
     By this time, the other two guardsmen had gotten their mouths closed and were 
dismounting, drawing swords.  So much for Mr. Nice Guy.  His sword slid into his hand 
as he turned and moved to put the wall at his back.  If the women had any sense--and 
Kasarya, at least, should--they'd get out of the way.
     Taynisya took a step forward and said, "Do not kill him!  This is the man for 
whom the Vizier has been searching, and he must be delivered to the Kashka alive."
     Tankesh took note, in the back of his mind, that this had been a trap all along.  
Taynisya would pay for that, but later.  Right now... nobody told him that he had to 
keep these Karnhorn Palace Guards alive.  Especially not that captain, sitting on his 
horse and waiting for his men to "teach the peasant manners."  Afraid to do his own 
dirty work?  Or did he just feel that he was above such things?  Whichever, he was 
going to find himself in trouble soon enough....
     Tankesh took out the first swordsman before the man could get set, with a 
slashing sweep to the sword arm that crippled it.  Then spun back to drive off one of 
the club-wielders he'd fought first, back to the second swordsman....  The action 
flowed into a blur guided by instinct and years of training, years that even the best 
of these guardsmen couldn't match.  They were probably good enough to dominate 
peasants, but that wasn't good enough to take HIM.
     Which the captain seemed to recognize, finally.  He drew his own sword and 
leaped down from his horse.  Off-hand shortsword for parrying, Tankesh noted, and 
steel back- and breast-plates instead of the leather worn by his men.  The captain 
moved like a man who knew what he was doing, too, probably trained in one of the 
better local schools, maybe even a local duelist... but could he equal a gladiator?  
And would the other men, the two that weren't badly hurt, stay out of it?  He heard 
the sounds of a scuffle off to the side, and Kasarya cursing, but couldn't turn to 
look.  With luck, she had taken out one of the guardsmen; at the least, she was 
keeping the man busy.

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 230): DOMINO of BONDAGE (Spawn, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 462): SHAIRLINDRIA of TUFT TUGGERS (Tankesh Dushanbe, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 462): CRAIG of OLYMPIANS (?, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 455): TOE-PAZ #2 of ROCK ETTS (Pie-Rite, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 451): JEHANNUM of THE ASININE (Philthy Phil, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 452): VAMPIRE of BARHOPPERS (Apex, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 452): R'AKA of THE DREADLANDS (LHI, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 448): THE FRATSFAN CHEF of ANDORIAN UNIVERSITY (Generalissimo
                         Puerco, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 413): JUDAS PRIEST of THAT 80'S METAL (Street Legal, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 407): GWYN AP NUDD of CAER SIDHE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 399): LH PUTTGRASS of DEATHTONGUE (Technogeek, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 178): LONGARMOFTHELAW of OTTO'S PARTS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 311): CROW of SHADOW SIGNS (Shadowgate, mgr.)
                            Ivy, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 230): BONDAGE (Spawn, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 462): TUFT TUGGERS (Tankesh Dushanbe, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 462): THE DOGHOUSE (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 455): THE ZOO (Morris, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 451): AUSSIE KILLERS (THawk, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 452): CARNIVAL (Carny, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 452): MENAGERIE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 448): RED DOG GANG (Goff, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 413): WIMPS MOST FOWL (Wimpy, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 407): WANDERERS (Schendirk, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 399): DEATHTONGUE (Technogeek, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 178): IRON CATHEDRAL (Dameon Darkheart, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 311): NATURAL DISASTERS (Soultaker, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 301): WHY KNOT (Clove-Hitch, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 132): SHADOW GOLD (Shadowgate, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 347): BOXES (Doc Steele, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 462): SHAIRLINDRIA of TUFT TUGGERS (Tankesh Dushanbe, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 462): CRAIG of OLYMPIANS (?, mgr.)
                          ESOX LUCIUS of DELIVERANCE (Lance Turbo, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 455): TOE-PAZ #2 of ROCK ETTS (Pie-Rite, mgr.)
                           COLOSSUS of BLADES OF WONDER (The Sandman, mgr.)
               (turn 454): SARU SKINK of THE ZOO (Morris, mgr.)
                           TAXES of THE DEMOCRATS (Al Gore, mgr.)
                           NEBUCHADNEZZAR of BLADES OF WONDER (The Sandman, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 451): JEHANNUM of THE ASININE (Philthy Phil, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 452): VAMPIRE of BARHOPPERS (Apex, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 451): COTTONMOUTH of VENOM (Lord Fang, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 406): SMASHNGRAB of FIST OF FIVE (Stik, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 310): HURFOON of SWIFT CURRENT (Barnabas, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 131): RAVEN of 2ND ARCTIC GUARDS (Yukon Cornelius, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Welcome ZENSU.  I, Olaf Modeen remember this place well.  Many the fights have I 
fought here.  The celebrations, the disappointments...  Bein' on top is great while 
it lasts, WIMPS MOST FOWL.  But how many friends do you have now?  What's with BIG 
BOP?  He actually beat BEYOND THE PALE's TERIS, and walked away with 23 more points 
from the fight.  Laughs were big at THAT 80'S METAL while they watched QUEENSRYCHE 
clobber YARDBIRD.  He lost 7 points and got bruised from objects thrown from the 
stands.  WIMPS MOST FOWL's hatred of THAT 80'S METAL surfaced again as BIRDBRAIN 
challenged ZENSU's top dog.  I can barely restrain my enthusiam for WIMPS MOST FOWL's 
outstanding member, Duelmaster BIRDBRAIN.  Advice to fighters with a 1 will--give up 
     No matter the time or place, men will always duel.  The most avoided team was 
CARNIVAL.  Management must be dealin', as the boys at WIMPS MOST FOWL ain't reelin'!  
CARNIVAL's mad!  How well I know the feeling of being the most challenged warrior, 
ONE-MAN BAND!  Don't make idle boasts, they may come back to haunt you.  ONE-MAN BAND 
didn't quite know what to make of a challenge he received from JIMMY CRICKET of 
SUNNYLAND, who is 25 points below him.  JIMMY CRICKET perhaps got his just desserts, 
seeing as he was bested by ONE-MAN BAND and ended up with 33 recognition points.   
     A fighter's lot is filled with strife, revenge, and killing.  Some fighters 
don't accept this.  The best do.  Many a warrior has met his fate in a hungover 
stupor.  You young rapscallions, take note!   
     Who knows what the future holds for a warrior.  More fights, there's no doubt.  
All work and no play makes Olaf a dull fighter.  Work and play no fighter dull Olaf.  
Olaffighterwork and no play.  Remember--a good fighter needs both good skills and 
good luck.  Until next time,-- Olaf Modeen  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BIRDBRAIN 3921               11   3  0   111       WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JUDAS PRIEST 3869            16  11  0    88       THAT 80'S METAL (394)
 DEAD DUCK 3911               12   6  2    87       WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)
 KLUMSY TUMBLES 3918           8   0  0    83       CARNIVAL (379)
 DESPICABLE DUCK 3915         11   6  0    80       WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)
 FOIL D'AGEN 3909              6   6  0    77       CARNIVAL (379)
 KING LOVE 3748                8   8  1    73       SUNNYLAND (382)
 JOPHAN 3846                  13  29  0    68       BEYOND THE PALE (337)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ONE-MAN BAND 3841            14   9  0    58       CARNIVAL (379)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SIANNA 3914                  12   7  0    52       BEYOND THE PALE (337)
 TERIS 3895                   11  15  1    49       BEYOND THE PALE (337)
 BIG BOP 3935                  5   1  0    47       CARNIVAL (379)
 WARRANT 3920                  6  10  0    44       THAT 80'S METAL (394)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-ENOCH 2814                    5   8  0    33       RELIGIOUS HERALD (306)
 JIMMY CRICKET 3744            5   8  0    33       SUNNYLAND (382)
 QUAKY ASP 3919                6   2  0    32       CARNIVAL (379)
 QUEENSRYCHE 3942              4   1  0    31       THAT 80'S METAL (394)
-SPIRITED 3766                 3   1  1    27       RELIGIOUS HERALD (306)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FLUSTER 3933                  3   5  1    20       WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)
 ARNIE EL SHEW 3930            2   8  0    19       BEYOND THE PALE (337)
-LEADFOOT 3516                 2   0  0    14       TACO GODS (152)
 YARDBIRD 3934                 3   4  0    13       WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)
-B 3746                        2   6  0    12       SUNNYLAND (382)
-IRON MAIDEN 3872              1   3  0     6       THAT 80'S METAL (394)
 TIGER ELF 3941                0   6  0     6       BEYOND THE PALE (337)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Jimmy Cricket -- How would you like to go fishing with me?  With you along I won't 
need to bring any bait. -- Yardbird

Jophan -- You are beyond pale.  But you are a good teacher.  Did you like my twisting 
thrust and my wall of blades? -- Birdbrain

Foil D'Agen -- I tried to swing, honest I did.  You fell down before I could really 
get going.  Next time I will be smarter. -- Dead Duck

Spirited -- What can I say?  Wimpy tells me that I am really smart and should learn a 
lot every fight.  I guess he is wrong. -- Fluster

Judas -- Matched up again?  Thanks a lot for the tummy tuck.  I needed that. - 
Despicable Duck

Tiger Elf -- You challenged me again!  Okay, this means war!  War, I say! -- Big Bop

Dead Duck -- Your style should use a halberd. -- Foil D'Agen

Mad Carrot -- Congrats on tourney. -- Carny

Enoch -- Not too shabby yourself. -- Carny

King Love -- You again!  Are you crazy? -- One-Man Band

Big Bop -- No!  The war is against Sianna. -- Quaky Asp

Sianna -- Never grin at a weapon. -- Klumsy

Big Bop -- You are both pop and least pop. -- One-Man

Religious Herald -- Welcome back!  Missed ya! -- Carny

Warrant -- (frowning)  When someone teaches you five skills, you're SUPPOSED to 
either let them win, or teach them something back. -- Teris

Queensryche -- I always have trouble with you little guys. -- Arnie El Shew

Birdbrain -- Damn, where do you PUT all those skills? -- Jophan

Klumsy Tumbles -- Not quite yet, but soon, really soon, I will get the positions JUST 
right and when you fall down, you'll end up in the old well.  Soon.... -- Sianna

Big Bop -- You think you're so smart, making COMMENTS about my name and the 
Commission's idiotic idea that I'm a Dwarf.  Well, you'll get yours, just wait! -- 
Tiger Elf

30 April 2003
All -- Remember to put your arena number on your strategy sheets.  Strategies turned
in without an arena number run the risk of missing the turn. -- NAIEI

10 May 2003
To All -- Fellow managers, I humbly request your help.  My team (Ex Oblivione) was
started in Monuntial (DM 34) back in '92.  They were active for seven months.  I have
lost all early traces of them.  If any of you can help with copies of relevant
newsletters or, if you fought one of my warriors, copies of the fights, I would
greatly appreciate it.  I only have one of my original warriors left from the early
team now active in DM 60.  You can diplo me with any info here in the wonderful city
of Aradi.  Thank you in advance. -- Enigma, manager Ex Oblivione

15 May 2003
Assurnasirbanipal invites all to use his computerized warrior management tool.  The
program is the most extensive management tool ever created.  It was meant to run on a
PALM OS PDA, but will run (emulated) on a PC or MAC.  You can get this program on the
web at: http://www.geocities.com/assurnasir

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

BIRDBRAIN devastated JUDAS PRIEST in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge Title fight.
FOIL D'AGEN vanquished JOPHAN in a 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.
QUAKY ASP was savagely defeated by SIANNA in a action packed 4 minute Challenge fight.
JIMMY CRICKET was bested by ONE-MAN BAND in a 4 minute Challenge fight.
YARDBIRD was overpowered by QUEENSRYCHE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
DESPICABLE DUCK was unbelievably bested by KHALHUMS DWARF in a 2 minute gory duel.
DEAD DUCK outwaited VETERAN MERCENARY in a crowd pleasing 7 minute match.
KING LOVE was overcome by KLUMSY TUMBLES in a 1 minute fight.
WARRANT was overcome by DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute melee.
TERIS was vanquished by BIG BOP in a 1 minute uneven duel.
FLUSTER overpowered TIGER ELF in a 1 minute uneven duel.
ARNIE EL SHEW overpowered MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   3         BASHING ATTACK    11 -   2 -  1      85  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         AIMED BLOW        14 -   8 -  0      64  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         TOTAL PARRY       16 -  10 -  0      62  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         LUNGING ATTACK    17 -  11 -  0      61  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         WALL OF STEEL      4 -   4 -  1      50  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  2         PARRY-RIPOSTE     12 -  13 -  0      48  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   1         SLASHING ATTACK   12 -  14 -  1      46  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-STRIKE       5 -   6 -  0      45  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  11 -  0      27  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         PARRY-LUNGE        0 -   6 -  0       0  |

Turn 414 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

LUNGING ATTACK     3 -  0     AIMED BLOW         1 -  2         3  AIMED BLOW     
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  2         2  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  1     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  2         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  1     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         2  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
                              PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                              WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0         1  STRIKING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       BIRDBRAIN 3921             11   3  0  111 WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)
SLASHING ATTACK  JUDAS PRIEST 3869          16  11  0   88 THAT 80'S METAL (394)
TOTAL PARRY      DEAD DUCK 3911             12   6  2   87 WIMPS MOST FOWL (355)
LUNGING ATTACK   KLUMSY TUMBLES 3918         8   0  0   83 CARNIVAL (379)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    SIANNA 3914                12   7  0   52 BEYOND THE PALE (337)
BASHING ATTACK   BIG BOP 3935                5   1  0   47 CARNIVAL (379)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is TERIS 3895.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
SIANNA 3914.  The ten other most popular fighters were BIRDBRAIN 3921, FOIL D'AGEN 

The least popular fighter this week was TIGER ELF 3941.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were TERIS 3895, WARRANT 3920, KING LOVE 3748, DEAD DUCK 3911, YARDBIRD 
3934, JIMMY CRICKET 3744, QUAKY ASP 3919, JOPHAN 3846, JUDAS PRIEST 3869, and ARNIE 
EL SHEW 3930.