Date   : 06/20/2008    Duedate: 07/03/2008


DM-40    TURN-547

This Weeks Top Honors



Chartered Recognition LeaderUnchartered Recognition Leader

                               MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)
                               (40-4278) [3-0-1,43]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

DACEANA LINZ                   GRUNT 4
BEYOND THE PALE (337)          MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)
(40-4244) [16-21-1,70]         (40-4275) [2-1-0,14]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)    25
2. MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)     17      MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)
3. NEUROMANCERS (404)           7      Unchartered Team
4. BEYOND THE PALE (337)        6
5. GUARDIANS II (247)         -16      MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 2 MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)  54  23  6 70.1   1/ 1*MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)  11  4 2
 2/ 1*MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)   11   5  2 68.8   2/ 2 MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)  6  2 2
 3/ 3 NEUROMANCERS (404)        55  45  6 55.0   3/ 3 BEYOND THE PALE (337)     6  9 0
 4/ 4 BEYOND THE PALE (337)    566 735 21 43.5   4/ 4 NEUROMANCERS (404)        3  3 0
 5/ 5 GUARDIANS II (247)        42  67  4 38.5   5/ 5 GUARDIANS II (247)        2  5 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

        + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Andorian Succession #7 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

On the Isle of the Eye:

     "Four steps and we're lost," Senator Sedalia muttered.  "This is worse than
     "They do say that the Isle is larger than the Lake and touches other waters,"
Gissanniah answered.  "What do we do?  Just start walking until we get somewhere--
     "It may come to that, but I'm not ready to give up yet."  The senator looked
around again.  "Hmm.  How about if I stand still, right here, and we hold hands--no,
that might not give us enough distance."  He undid his necktie and handed one end to
his companion.  "I'll stand here and hold my end, you go out to the farthest end of
the tie and your arm--no fear of it breaking, silk is very strong--and walk around me
in a wide circle.  We haven't come so far as all that.  You should be able to reach
the edge of the woods at some point on that circle.  Then you stand still and tug on
the tie until I join you."  Of course, it was possible that the edge of the woods was
no longer four steps away, or that any edge they found would be the one they'd come
from.  You could never tell, with magic.  But since neither he nor Gissanniah could
do anything about those possibilities, the senator saw no point in mentioning them.


     "That's a big fire," Lenpro said.
     Fandil squinted ahead.  It was certainly a lot of smoke.  "Maybe... they're
burning brush in the fields before planting?" he suggested.
     "Late in the season to plant."
     "It's been a wet spring, planting has been delayed in a lot of places."
     "Maybe," Lenpro said, "but that smoke is rising over the city of Tarrgir.  It
might be buildings burning, instead of brush."
     "If that's so, perhaps we can help them put the fire out," Fandil said.  He
urged his horse to a faster pace.
     "If they want the fires put out," Lenpro muttered.  "I have a feeling about


     Herlas backed up two steps before he even thought about it.  "You can't parade
that golem through the streets and claim it's the king!"
     Hesselbod raised his eyebrows.  "Of course we can."  He gestured at the golem
who stood obediently, dressed in royal garments and awaiting a command.  "The artist
who modeled the face and figure has caught the appearance of the last king quite
well, the artificer who constructed the golem was the best Lord Korneth could hire,
and with your magic to cast a glamor over the whole, no one will doubt that this
truly is the king."
     Herlas gaped in silence for a moment, stunned by the magnitude of Lord Korneth's
ambition and of the royal scribe's misunderstanding.  "The best illusions will not
fool everyone," he said, "and without illusion, that is obviously a golem.  You'll
have a firestorm of outraged citizens--"
     "That is not your concern," Lord Korneth said coldly, entering the room.  He
dismissed the scribe with a flick of his eyes.
     Herlas turned to face him squarely.  He was not afraid of Korneth of Sengir, who
had come from nowehre and styled himself Chief Minister of Andoria, but he was deeply
wary.  There was too much unknown about this man for anyone to feel relaxed around
him, starting with where Sengir might be found and what Korneth wanted with the
Andorian states.  Herlas had thought, originally, that Korneth was driven by a simple
ambition to rule.  Ambition, he could understand, and as the man was no magician,
their goals should not conflict.  Now, though... he wasn't sure.  Ambition, yes, but
not simple.  "Why not produce the real king?" he asked.  "Even drugged or enspelled
to be your puppet, he would be more convincing than that golem."
     Korneth's lip curled in a sneer.  "The 'real king' no longer exists, and he was
pathetic to begin with."  He dismissed the point with a wave of his hand.  "And it is
not your concern.  Do not think to usurp authority to question or command.  Your only
business is to do as you are told.  In this case, to cast the glamor."

On the Isle of the Eye:

     Sedalia waited, holding one end of his tie and turning slowly in place.  He was
fairly sure he was still in the same place.  And beginning to suspect that he had
made more than one complete turn.  Blast these trees!  They all looked alike.
Somewhere out of sight, Gissanniah hesitated.  Not the first time.  What was she
seeing?  The young woman was observant and intelligent, but he wanted to be seeing
for himself.  Still, he shifted his grip to accomodate another turn, she was the more
nimble of the two of them and better suited to dodging around trees.
     Two definite tugs.  The signal.  Senator Sedalia began to follow his silk tie
through the trees.


     Half the city was in flames.  The two managers sat their horses on the rise at
the edge of the river valley, looking down at smoke and ruin.
     "At this point, there isn't a thing we could do," Fandil said.  He shook his
head.  "Not even with magic.  They seem to have it under control--not spreading
further, at least--but I can't imagine how it spread so fast!"
     "Arson," Lenpro said.  "Fires started in several places at once."  He squinted
down at the city.  "Looks like the Military Academy was about in the center of the
burned area; it's all gone now."
     "I don't understand how people can do that," Fandil muttered.  "Arson--blind
     Lenpro was silent for a long moment, then started his horse forward and down the
slope.  "Maybe not so blind," he said over his shoulder.  "If someone wanted to
destroy the Andorian League, it looks like there's been a good beginning made."
     Fandil urged his horse to catch up.  "Just burning down the Academy won't--"
     "And driving a wedge between the Aruaki and the normal humans," Lenpro reminded
him.  "And more things, I have no doubt, that we haven't found yet."
     "Who would want to destroy the League, and why?" Fandil demanded.  "Surely even
the Delarquans or the Karnhorns wouldn't--"
     "Why not?" Lenpro asked.  "And there are probably other enemies out there that
we don't happen to know about."

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 297): UNHOLY TERROR of BLOOD RITES (Wretch, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 595): CHIEF SITTING BULL of BULLDOGS (Kennelworth, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 595): STEWART of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 588): DONDRIC of KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 584): MORLIN POOLE of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 584): KEG STAND of BARHOPPERS (Apex, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 581): IRIS of MENAGERIE (Ichabod Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 577): IRISH CREAM of RED DOG GANG (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 546): LON CHANEY JR. of MEN OF 1,000 FACES (Mad Max, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 537): RAMBLING OX of WANDERERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 528): BANNIR PARK of BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 244): PAINFUL PANSY of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 430): DIMAGGIO oF 1949 YANKEES (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 198): TRYPTOPHAN of SUPERIOR FORCES (Manager, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 480): AXLY HIMSELF of GERFEL'S FRIENDS (Generalissimo Puerco)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 297): CONSANGUINEOUS (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 595): BULLDOGS (Kennelworth, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 585): ALL THE MUN'S MEN (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 588): KELLUMBO'S KIDS (Detective Kellumbo, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 584): MEDAL OF HONOR F3 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 584): BARHOPPERS (Apex, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 577): RED DOG GANG (Jojra, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 546): MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 537): WANDERERS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 528): FANDILS (Wise Old Fandil, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 244): FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 430): 1949 YANKEES (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 198): THE ZOO (Jorja, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 480): SUPERIOR FORCES (Manager, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 296): HAMMURABI of SMITHSONIAN (Curator, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 594): WALK THE LINE of ELFQUEST (Armalias, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 594): MOLYNEUX of OTAGO HIGHLANDERS (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 587): CHUCKER ISTTA of MIDDLE WAY 15 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 583): MIRESSEA POOLE of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 576): PRIVATE PERNA of LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 243): IGOR MALMORT of BLOOD AND GUTS! (Le Pentarque, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Lords and Ladies of Zensu, I, Lon Chaney Jr, your Duelmaster, salute you.  I have
successfully defended my title again, against my style mate, Chuck Elvis.  I must
apologize to you all as this is my third straight turn as Duelmaster and I haven't
written a column.  I consider it an honor to write a Duelmaster column and not a
burden.  I know I have not shown that as of late but that is how I feel.

I will be sitting out now until my manager deems me worthy of entering a tournament.
I will receive my invite upon my next arena fight so I shall wait until the turn
before the tournament is to occur then I will fight in the arena so I can be immortal
for the Champions tourney.  While I don't have a chance to TC or probably even TV my
manager feels this strategy is for the best.  Unless due to some unforeseen
circumstance, I will be a rare warrior of my style to run in Advanced.

I am hoping that in my absence that my guildmate and colleague Bela Lugosi can attain
the throne of Duelmaster.  The odds of Bela defeating either Chuck Elvis or Daceana
Linz are not very good however so we all need to keep our fingers crossed for that to

I hope that when I next fight in Zensu that I will be able to reclaim my title.  If
that does not happen I want you all to know what an honor it has been to be
Duelmaster in this fine city.  I shall make you all proud when and if I make it to
the Isle.

Lords and Ladies of Zensu, I, Lon Chaney Jr, your Duelmaster, salute you!!!!

Lon Chaney Jr.

                                      SPY REPORT

     If you were disturbed from your beauty rest only to have to watch a bunch of 
ZENSU brutes like you, you'd be grouchy, too.  Of course, we're all terribly 
impressed to see CHRISTOPHER LEE win a fight and gain 21 points, terribly.  Tsk, tsk, 
GRUNT 5 beat LADY TIFF and LADY TIFF lost 11 points.  You're breakin' my heart.  Due 
to absence, and inability to defend the throne, LON CHANEY JR. has lost the Title of 
Duelmaster.  Start setting that alarm earlier!  I'm not in a very good mood today, 
but why am I telling you this?  You want to know what's new, don't you, ZENSU?   
     My mother always told me, 'If you don't have anything nice to say, start 
talking.' I loved that woman.  GUARDIANS II, I suppose you'll be glad to know you 
were this turn's most avoided team.  Care to know who is the most afraid of you?  And 
it looks like MEN OF 1,000 FACES avoided them the most this turn.  What a pack of 
would be losers, if you ask me.  Hmph.  Ooh, I'm frightfully impressed, CADDIS DEANE 
was this turn's most challenged warrior.  Watch that ego swell, sports fans.  I 
notice BELA LUGOSI challenging down 22 points to fight PARTICLE MAN, MEN OF 1,000 
FACES doubtless has some rotten excuse for such an insult to honor.  Ha ha aha ha aha 
ha!!!  BELA LUGOSI was was overcame by by NEUROMANCERS' warrior!  Thank the gods for 
big favors!  ha!  And we have NORM THE GNOME in a challenge, going down 10 points for 
the fight.  Guess what?  I thought NORM THE GNOME showed great skill and promise when 
he was overcame by CHUCK ELVIS.  All right, so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     Ah, now we come to my favorite part, where we see all the guys who are dead and 
gone, and get to see if their team cared.  Ya gotta go sometime, and CADDIS DEANE's 
time was this time.  Hmmm, not a bad fighter, had he lived... (what?  me pity?).  
Nipped in the bud, you might say, was WHITE NOISE of NEUROMANCERS this turn.  Course, 
I wouldn't say that, so much as have a belly laugh.  Heh heh.  We're all going to die 
in the end, so why worry if the fate catches up with you sooner that later?   
     What does the ZENSU arena have in common with the inns?  It's just as 
comfortable to sleep in either place.  Ha ha ha ha!  Just wait 'till next time I show 
up here, I won't be so nice!  So nyaaah!  Glad to see the back of this place-- Snide 

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-LON CHANEY JR. 4116          16   3  2   146       MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)
 CHUCK ELVIS 4235             22  19  0   102       BEYOND THE PALE (337)
 PARTICLE MAN 4100            14  11  1   102       NEUROMANCERS (404)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 NORM THE GNOME 2377          11   3  2    88       GUARDIANS II (247)
-TINY GREENLEAF 2393           7   4  1    85       GUARDIANS II (247)
 BELA LUGOSI 4114             11   5  0    79       MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)
 DACEANA LINZ 4244            16  21  1    70       BEYOND THE PALE (337)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CHRISTOPHER LEE 4139          4   2  2    51       MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)
 GRUNT 5 4278                  3   0  1    43       MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DAY TURNER 4279               2   2  0    25       MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)
 GRUNT 3 4277                  3   0  1    24       MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TERILEE LINZ 4273             5   3  0    22       BEYOND THE PALE (337)
 LADY TIFF 2666                4   3  0    21       GUARDIANS II (247)
 PETER CUSHING 4280            2   0  0    18       MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)
 CLAUDE RAINS 4283             1   0  1    16       MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)
 GRUNT 4 4275                  2   1  0    14       MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)
-ABSOLUTE ZERO 4031            1   3  0    14       NEUROMANCERS (404)
 TAHKASIS 2665                 1   6  0     9       GUARDIANS II (247)
 BECKER MAINZ 4284             0   2  0     2       BEYOND THE PALE (337)
 SLOWBURN 4282                 0   1  0     2       GUARDIANS II (247)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
CADDIS DEANE 4272       6  3 0 BEYOND THE PALE 337  CHRISTOPHER LEE 4139  547   
DA1 4276                1  2 0 MEDAL OF HONOR G 439 CLAUDE RAINS 4283     547   
WHITE NOISE 4274        4  1 0 NEUROMANCERS 404     CAPTURED ORC          547  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Caddis Deane -- A lady always likes compliments, but I want another try at you first.
The way it's going, if my career does not take a turn for the better, I will have
plenty of free time on my hands. -- Tahkasis

Dacena Linez -- Don't mind the bathtub comment....  Of course I would take you out in
our fine city and treat you like the lady you are.  And of course I keep my beard
neatly trimmed.  Besides, the finches won't be back to nest until the spring. --
Norme The Gnome

Lon Chaney Jr -- You haven't left yet?  I am waiting for my turn up there, but I
don't want to go through you or your head shots again to get it! -- Norme the

Lon Chaney Jr. -- You're nothing but a hound dog, dammit. -- Chuck Elvis
P.S.  At least you're not a bulldog.  Those are UGLY.

Convicted Assassin?  What a waste of my time and effort, because it's a sure thing
that someone will patch him up and send him out to assassinate more. -- Daceana Linz

DA1 -- I believe you may have showed up too early for your proper fight?  Unless your
designation is supposed to be read as Da 1, meaning, THE one.  I hope not. -- Caddis

Day Turner -- What do you turn days into? -- Terilee Linz

Grunt 4 -- Are you saying that I should grunt more if I want to win?  One grunt not
enough?  Huh.  My momma always told me grunting was a sign of being low and animal-
like, but maybe that's what gladiating takes. -- Becker Mainz

31 May 2008
Any and all who live in the 805 area, I would like for you to call me so we can get
together for BBQ's, softball games, and so on.  It has been a while since the last
get together (several years).  It was a blast and I am sure the next one will be
also.  We just have to do it.  All alliances are welcome.  Just because my warriors
leave your warrior beaten and bloody in defeat does not mean we can't have a beer or
five together.  I'll even buy the first round.  So call 805-588-3419 and ask for Dave
a.k.a. Misfit, former member of the Green and Purple Polka Dot Alliance (GAPPDA).

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

NORM THE GNOME was bested by CHUCK ELVIS in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
BELA LUGOSI was devastated by PARTICLE MAN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
CHRISTOPHER LEE easily killed CADDIS DEANE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
PETER CUSHING vanquished BECKER MAINZ in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
DACEANA LINZ was overpowered by KUNG-FU MASTER in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
WHITE NOISE was butchered by CAPTURED ORC in a 1 minute uneven brawl.
LADY TIFF was overpowered by GRUNT 5 in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
TAHKASIS was devastated by DAY TURNER in a 1 minute one-sided competition.
TERILEE LINZ slimly won victory over GRUNT 4 in a action packed 4 minute melee.
DA1 was slaughtered by CLAUDE RAINS in a 1 minute uneven fight.
GRUNT 3 viciously subdued SLOWBURN in a 2 minute brutal novice's fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   5         PARRY-LUNGE        2 -   0 -  0     100  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         SLASHING ATTACK   12 -   5 -  2      71  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         PARRY-STRIKE       6 -   3 -  0      67  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -   1 -  0      67  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         AIMED BLOW         8 -   5 -  1      62  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         BASHING ATTACK     9 -   8 -  0      53  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         TOTAL PARRY       10 -   9 -  0      53  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         LUNGING ATTACK     9 -  14 -  1      39  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  0         WALL OF STEEL      0 -   0 -  0       0  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    0         STRIKING ATTACK    0 -   1 -  0       0  |

Turn 547 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  4         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         2  BASHING ATTACK 
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  AIMED BLOW     
AIMED BLOW         2 -  2     STRIKING ATTACK    0 -  0         2  SLASHING ATTACK
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  1     WALL OF STEEL      0 -  0         1  TOTAL PARRY    

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
BASHING ATTACK   CHUCK ELVIS 4235           22  19  0  102 BEYOND THE PALE (337)
TOTAL PARRY      PARTICLE MAN 4100          14  11  1  102 NEUROMANCERS (404)
LUNGING ATTACK   NORM THE GNOME 2377        11   3  2   88 GUARDIANS II (247)
AIMED BLOW       BELA LUGOSI 4114           11   5  0   79 MEN OF 1,000 FACES (420)
SLASHING ATTACK  GRUNT 5 4278                3   0  1   43 MEDAL OF HONOR G1 (439)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is DACEANA LINZ 4244.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was GRUNT 4 4275.  The ten other most popular fighters were CHUCK ELVIS 4235, 

The least popular fighter this week was SLOWBURN 4282.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were DA1 4276, TAHKASIS 2665, LADY TIFF 2666, WHITE NOISE 4274, BECKER MAINZ 

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn: