DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER Date : 10/11/2003 Duedate: 10/24/2003 RODEKI ARENA DM-42 TURN-418 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS PUDDING PARADE COLOR ME SUAVE (322) (42-3902) [18-2-0,126] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader PUDDING PARADE SOUPLE COLOR ME SUAVE (322) WAY OF THE SWORD A3 (356) (42-3902) [18-2-0,126] (42-4030) [4-1-0,61] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite PROBLEMATIC PUDDING PARADE FLAGG'S FIVE (213) COLOR ME SUAVE (322) (42-3928) [14-14-0,56] (42-3902) [18-2-0,126] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM COLOR ME SUAVE (322) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. FLAGG'S FIVE (213) 39 2. WAY OF THE SWORD A3 (356) 29 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) 3. CLOWNING AROUND (354) 18 Unchartered Team 4. COLOR ME SUAVE (322) 13 5. DELVERS (154) -13WAY OF THE SWORD A3 (356) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1/ 1 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) 226 160 15 58.5 1/ 1 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) 9 6 0 2/ 2 CLOWNING AROUND (354) 15 13 0 53.6 2/ 3 CLOWNING AROUND (354) 6 0 0 3/ 3*WAY OF THE SWORD A (356) 12 13 0 48.0 3/ 4 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) 5 5 0 4/ 4 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) 115 140 7 45.1 4/ 2 DELVERS (154) 4 11 0 5/ 5 DELVERS (154) 296 418 5 41.5 5/ 5*WAY OF THE SWORD A (356) 2 3 0 '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank TEAM SPOTLIGHT + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Delvers ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ + "It's a treasure map," Ann Artichoke explained helpfully. "X marks the spot." "I can see what it is," Harby muttered. "And it's a snare and a delusion is what it is. A treasure hidden in Sibikhas? And nobody who lives there has found it?" "Sibikhas is deserted," Sushee Su cut in. "Just because the arena is closed doesn't mean the TOWN is closed," Harby argued. "And there are some mighty tough nuts still hanging around there, so even if there WAS a treasure, and you could find it, your chances of getting out of town with both your life and the treasure are not good." "You are such a spoil-sport," John Rose murmured, shaking his head sadly. "You worry and fret because we're short on cash, and then Ann finds this very possible treasure map, and you don't want us to go looking?" "I've been over the mountain a few times," the manager retorted. "I'm not so naive any more as some people I might mention." "What if we get some of the other gladiators to go along?" Ann suggested. "That would spread the risk around more, and the expense of outfitting the expedition, and--" "And mean smaller shares for everyone who FINDS anything," Sushee Su cut in again. "I don't like that idea." "You never like ideas that mean sharing," John Rose noted. "So what? And also, who asked you? Ann's the one who found the map, and if SHE is willing to share, then we share. I bet Yankee Dan or one of his teammates might come along. Or what about one of Flagg's warriors? There've got to be other people here in Rodeki as bored and broke as we are." "But are they as dumb and gullible?" Harby muttered. He sighed and looked at his gladiators mournfully. "You're going to do this, aren't you? No matter what I say." John Rose nodded. "Yeah, I think we are." SPY REPORT Hail and well met warriors of RODEKI! Know me for who I am, Zontani Sharp Eyes, Spymaster extraordinaire of all Alastari. DRAXUS BREMOORE caught the eye of many in the gladiatorial commission as he skillfully bested ANN ARTICHOKE and was awarded 20 points in recognition. In one of the week's more notable duels, DRAXUS BREMOORE put down ANN ARTICHOKE, causing her to lose 14 points of recognition in the process. Not for nothing has PUDDING PARADE in the past laid claim to the Duelmaster's throne, and this week he's proven his combat skill yet again. Informants "close" to the city champion have told me that he never fights without pantyhose on beneath his armor. Watch out! I have been in deep conclave with my spies who watched all that has recently transpired. Indeed there is much I would report. My inside sources tell me that the team to beat in RODEKI these days is COLOR ME SUAVE. At least, most blades in town are looking to avoid them. If you didn't look down dark alleys you'd have been hard pressed to find any of FLAGG'S FIVE last week. Busy avoiding COLOR ME SUAVE? Mighty fighters cannot but expect competition from those below. ANN ARTICHOKE take warning! You have more than a few enemies in RODEKI. I can not but mention with disdain the name of BOZO who this week posted a challenge to a warrior a full 12 points below in the rankings. I thought BOZO showed great skill and promise when he beat LIMPY TWO-SCREWS. All right, so I slept through it! Big deal! What warrior does not hone his years, impatiently waiting for the moment of his foe's mortality? Dark alleys may hide both secrets and assassins. In the arena there is only the brightness of steel. Keep vigil always! The girls are as pretty in RODEKI as ever I remembered them....and the fighters as ugly! Don't let your reputation slip! Ahh, but I can hear the spires of a far off city calling to me. I must away! Till next we meet remember: a fool flies into a rage quickly and often. The wise are angered by the same thing only once. Zontani Sharp Eyes DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME PUDDING PARADE 3902 18 2 0 126 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME DRAXUS BREMOORE 3980 9 4 0 99 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME RUBBER BUMPER 3903 18 26 0 84 DELVERS (154) SNAPPY GEORGE 4015 10 4 0 77 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) ANN ARTICHOKE 3984 14 5 0 75 DELVERS (154) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME GATE WITCH 3953 13 4 0 63 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) STERLING 3950 12 10 3 61 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) SOUPLE 4030 4 1 0 61 WAY OF THE SWORD A3 (356) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME PROBLEMATIC 3928 14 14 0 56 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) YANKEE DAN 4019 9 4 0 53 CLOWNING AROUND (354) FUZZY BUZZCUT 4024 8 3 0 46 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) EL RIPPOFF 3992 9 8 0 45 DELVERS (154) ARERIS 4035 3 1 0 39 WAY OF THE SWORD A3 (356) OSTMAN 4034 3 2 0 38 WAY OF THE SWORD A3 (356) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME JOHN ROSE 3985 7 12 0 33 DELVERS (154) BOZO 4016 5 8 0 32 CLOWNING AROUND (354) SUSHEE SU 3983 5 14 0 30 DELVERS (154) SOUFFLE GUFFAW 4023 5 6 0 29 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME LIMPY TWO-SCREWS 4048 2 4 0 17 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) LYRIA ADLER 4065 1 0 0 15 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? GITH 4033 2 3 0 WAY OF THE SWORD 356 SPYMASTER 22 418 NONE PERSONAL ADS Guys and gal -- Hopefully, if everything went well, you'll see my guys grace the sands here again this turn. -- Flagg Ann -- And what does a girl like you know so much about tatting for? When your personal was published, we wondered about your ability with grammar, until I finally broke down and opened up a dictionary. Perhaps you're the one who taught the Veteran Mercenary all his skills!?! -- Assur Sushee Su -- Never mind about the anger thing. I can see that I was mistaken. But perhaps you'd like to talk to a friend of mine. He is a very nice gentleman and might be able to help you with your problem...er um...I mean I think he could, uh, be a good friend for you at this time in your life. He knows all sorts of stuff and is a doctor, too. Not that you need a doctor, but I think you and he would hit it off great.... -- Yankee Dan John Rose -- Thanks! I know you appreciate me. After all, you come to see my act every night.... But you're too kind, with the awe and amazement you have with my act. I even drove you to curse last week. You're the best! I appreciate you, too! -- Yankee Dan Limpy -- How about one more for the road? -- Bozo I'm baaaaaack! -- Flagg Souffle Guffaw -- Not too shabby for some one with only a third of my fights. -- Problematic Snappy George -- That was so fun, I am asking Flagg to let me challenge you again! -- Sterling El Ripoff -- Hmmmmmm...where's the ripoff part...wait a minute.... Where'd my steel cap go? -- Gate Witch #2 (who's greatly missing #1) Ann Artichoke -- Bah! I get you all desperate and everything and then you go and do that to me! Do you know my kidneys still hurt? -- Draxus Bremoore All -- Any of you guys plan on running any dead dudes this tourney? I've got a couple that I am going to try to bring back. I'm still trying to figure out why I DA'd a sz 3 +4 Def LU. I am kicking myself in the arse repeatedly for that. -- Flagg Yankee Dan -- You laughed. The audience laughed. (I wouldn't call him a crowd.) (sigh) What can I say, your final joke and the pratfall you induced me to take were probably hilarious from the stands. I hate that. -- John Rose Pudding Parade -- What could we say about such a short fight? -- Harby Draxus Bremore -- It's a reflex, I see a man shorter than I am, and I pound him into the ground. I hate short men. I hate them more if they're Dwarves, but I hate short men anyway. -- Ann Artichoke Gate Witch 3953 -- Skill-rape! -- El Ripoff Gate Witch -- Amazing the amount of hypocrisy he can get into a single compound word, isn't it? -- Ann Artichoke Fuzzy Buzzcut -- I itch just looking at you. And you're ugly, besides. -- Sushee Su Managers of Rodeki -- Are you as tired as I am of seeing a one-page newsletter? Would you like to see it padded with a little meaningless fiction? Do you warriors want to see their names in print? Etc. If the answers to any of these questions are yes, contact me at Livia@reality.com or put a personal or a diplo in this newsletter, and we'll see what happens. -- Harby, Delvers 15 September 2003 An Announcement Concerning the Brotherhood of the Blade Alliance: I have chosen to withdraw my membership from the Brotherhood of the Blade alliance. The years I have spent in the alliance have been the best of my DM career. I leave the alliance with many great friends and will always remain close to my former brethren. The Brotherhood of the Blade will not skip a beat without my membership. It remains in very capable hands and its roster is among the strongest in the game. With the return on some of its founding members to DM, I know the BOB will continue to grow in strength and prestige in the years to come. -- The Sandman 29 September 2003 All -- Let it be known that the Firm accepts SOL into its ranks. The Firm is: SunGod, Dark Spirit, Youngblood, Tripwire, and SOL. LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS GITH was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight. DRAXUS BREMOORE devastated ANN ARTICHOKE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel. STERLING was overcome by SNAPPY GEORGE in a popular 1 minute Challenge match. BOZO unbelievably bested LIMPY TWO-SCREWS in a 1 minute Challenge brawl. PUDDING PARADE overpowered RUBBER BUMPER in a 6 minute mismatched Title match. GATE WITCH defeated ARERIS in a exciting 1 minute struggle. PROBLEMATIC slimly lost to YANKEE DAN in a popular 6 minute competition. FUZZY BUZZCUT unbelievably bested SUSHEE SU in a 2 minute gruesome melee. EL RIPPOFF won victory over SOUFFLE GUFFAW in a 6 minute duel. SOUPLE overpowered DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute uneven duel. JOHN ROSE was overpowered by OSTMAN in a 1 minute one-sided fight. LYRIA ADLER handily defeated PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 1 minute one-sided bout. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |SLASHING ATTACK 3 AIMED BLOW 1 - 0 - 0 100 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 3 PARRY-LUNGE 3 - 1 - 0 75 | |TOTAL PARRY 3 PARRY-RIPOSTE 20 - 10 - 0 67 | |LUNGING ATTACK 3 SLASHING ATTACK 6 - 3 - 0 67 | |WALL OF STEEL 3 TOTAL PARRY 19 - 13 - 0 59 | |BASHING ATTACK 2 BASHING ATTACK 12 - 10 - 0 55 | |STRIKING ATTACK 2 STRIKING ATTACK 10 - 11 - 0 48 | |PARRY-LUNGE 1 LUNGING ATTACK 9 - 13 - 0 41 | |PARRY-STRIKE 1 PARRY-STRIKE 2 - 3 - 0 40 | |AIMED BLOW 0 WALL OF STEEL 13 - 21 - 1 38 | Turn 418 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: PARRY-LUNGE 1 - 0 AIMED BLOW 0 - 0 3 TOTAL PARRY SLASHING ATTACK 3 - 0 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 1 2 SLASHING ATTACK BASHING ATTACK 2 - 0 LUNGING ATTACK 0 - 3 2 PARRY-RIPOSTE PARRY-RIPOSTE 2 - 1 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 3 1 PARRY-LUNGE TOTAL PARRY 2 - 1 1 LUNGING ATTACK STRIKING ATTACK 1 - 1 1 PARRY-STRIKE 1 BASHING ATTACK TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME TOTAL PARRY PUDDING PARADE 3902 18 2 0 126 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) SLASHING ATTACK DRAXUS BREMOORE 3980 9 4 0 99 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) PARRY-RIPOSTE SNAPPY GEORGE 4015 10 4 0 77 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) PARRY-LUNGE GATE WITCH 3953 13 4 0 63 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) LUNGING ATTACK STERLING 3950 12 10 3 61 FLAGG'S FIVE (213) BASHING ATTACK FUZZY BUZZCUT 4024 8 3 0 46 COLOR ME SUAVE (322) STRIKING ATTACK OSTMAN 4034 3 2 0 38 WAY OF THE SWORD A3 (356) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is PROBLEMATIC 3928. The most popular warrior this turn was PUDDING PARADE 3902. The ten other most popular fighters were PROBLEMATIC 3928, YANKEE DAN 4019, GATE WITCH 3953, EL RIPPOFF 3992, STERLING 3950, LIMPY TWO-SCREWS 4048, SUSHEE SU 3983, DRAXUS BREMOORE 3980, SNAPPY GEORGE 4015, and BOZO 4016. The least popular fighter this week was RUBBER BUMPER 3903. The other ten least popular fighters were JOHN ROSE 3985, ARERIS 4035, ANN ARTICHOKE 3984, GITH 4033, SOUPLE 4030, LYRIA ADLER 4065, OSTMAN 4034, SOUFFLE GUFFAW 4023, FUZZY BUZZCUT 4024, and BOZO 4016. The following warriors will travel to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after next turn: PUDDING PARADE (42-3902) COLOR ME SUAVE (322) NEW GRADUATES--FROM ALL ARENAS (INCLUDING CLOSED ARENAS) For those of you who keep track of such things, 18 additional warriors graduated from regular DM arenas (including closed arenas) since the last tournament: CAFFEINE JUNKIE (3-6110) ADDICTED CATFISH HUNTER (5-3315) PARTY ANIMALS MATTAHOOPLE (16-4203) GIFTED GODS SWEET JANE (53-6535) THE DARK TEMPLE LIL NOIR (62-3311) ENIGMA NARCISSISTIC NUN (69-8644) ODD SQUAD LEGION '8' (71-2369) D.O.A. RAW SEX APPEAL (82-1331) WHY WE LOVE TUM ZOMBIE STOMP (82-2617) NO MORE TEARS VIOLENT VOLE (82-4565) MAMMAL MILITIA LADY OF THE MOON (82-5481) HARM NONE KAMIKAZI GNAT (82-6073) DEADLY ATTACKS II THE 13TH WARRIOR (82-6346) STOOPID MOVIES SIRTON (82-9190) I AM SUCK DUNE (82-10414) 4-LETTER EPICS FLEM (82-12614) 4-LETTER FLUIDS GREENHOUSE EFFECT (82-12996) GLOBAL WARMING UGLY (82-14501) 4-LETTER DESCRIPTION -- Green Eyes