Date   : 05/08/2004    Duedate: 05/21/2004


DM-42    TURN-433

This Weeks Top Honors


(42-3984) [22-12-0,123]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

DELVERS (154)                  MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)
(42-3984) [22-12-0,123]        (42-4113) [3-2-1,56]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

GUNSLINGER                     ANN ARTICHOKE
KING'S KREW (151)              DELVERS (154)
(42-1587) [16-20-2,96]         (42-3984) [22-12-0,123]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. HIGHER PURPOSE (363)        24
2. KING'S KREW (151)           24      COLOR ME SUAVE (322)
3. CLOWNING AROUND (354)       15      Unchartered Team
4. COLOR ME SUAVE (322)        12
5. DELVERS (154)                8      HIGHER PURPOSE (363)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 COLOR ME SUAVE (322)     269 189 16 58.7   1/ 2 COLOR ME SUAVE (322)     10  3 0
 2/ 2 CLOWNING AROUND (354)     33  26  0 55.9   2/ 1 DELVERS (154)            10  5 1
 3/ 3 FLAGG'S FIVE (213)       159 169  9 48.5   3/ 3 FLAGG'S FIVE (213)        7  8 0
 4/ 0*HIGHER PURPOSE (363)       7   8  2 46.7   4/ 0*HIGHER PURPOSE (363)      3  2 0
 5/ 4 DELVERS (154)            332 455  6 42.2   5/ 5 CLOWNING AROUND (354)     3  4 0
 6/ 5*MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)        8  14  3 36.4   6/ 4*MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)       3  9 2
 7/ 6 KING'S KREW (151)         61 113  2 35.1   7/ 6 KING'S KREW (151)         2  8 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

     Flagg paced nervously back and forth in his guild house.  How had it come to 
this?  People trying to kill HIM?  He had been walking the back alleyway behind 
Rodeki's arena when he was struck in the neck by a dart tipped with black lotus.  He 
had two things going for him: He was tolerant to black lotus, thanks to a misspent 
youth, and he had reserved enough magic to teleport him back to the guild house.  
Unfortunately, if his assailant tracked him back to the guild house he would be 
defenseless, at least until his magic regenerated.
     Almost on cue with the thought, he was tugged back by his hair and a blade was 
put to his throat.  Flagg could feel the heat coming from the attacker's breath and 
he could smell a stench, faintly familiar as if from a distant memory.  The attacker 
spun him around and he stood face to face with him.  Then he realized what the stench 
was.  Doone's eyes were ablaze, literally, with fire.  Something Flagg hadn't seen in 
     "What are you doing here?  I thought you were still on the Isle?" Flagg asked.
     "I retired.  At least for now, I retired." Doone answered simply enough.
     "I appreciate you coming back, it couldn't be at a bett..." Flagg was 
interrupted by Doone signaling for him to be quiet.
     Quietly Doone whispered, "The hunt is on."  Doone spun silently on his heels and 
effortlessly drew his longsword.  There was the sound of a foot dragging in the dirt 
and Flagg turned to see where it came from. No one was to be seen.  Flagg looked back 
to gesture for Doone, but he had disappeared.  No flames, no smoke, nothing.  He was 
     In the next instant a shriek was heard from behind the guild house.  Flagg burst 
out of the front door of the guild house and ran to the rear.  Doone was standing 
over the very dead body of an Arukai Werecat.  Doone looked at Flagg, "It is not safe 
for you here.  We must head to the caves."


     The Lady In Black turned from her viewing sphere disappointed.  "Go to the 
caves, my dear.  I'll have some friends waiting for you there as well.  And this time 
they'll make sure you don't disrupt my plans again."
     She motioned for the thing behind her to come forward.  The Iron Golem 
responded, tugging at the reigns of the Great White Wyrm he had mastered.  She 
pointed at the fading image of Flagg.  "Find that Dwarf we befriended and then take 
your pet and KILL HIM!"

            + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Out of the Past #7 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +
                                   Delarquan Edition

Old Valamantis:

     The group of gladiators moved toward the edge of the risen city as slowly and 
carefully as they would have approached a sleeping dragon... that maybe wasn't 
sleeping after all.  There was a partial wall separating the buildings from the 
countryside around them, but it must be outside the area of effect, because it was 
not in good condition.  There were gaps and fallen stones, even trees growing between 
them where the ages had trapped dirt.
     Smeds of Mordant patted one of the stones thoughtfully.  "Honest stonework 
here," he murmured.
     "And more recent than the ruins," Shamu of Cliffhome agreed.  "Six hundred 
years, I'd say."  He glanced at Smeds, and the other Dwarf nodded agreement.
     "Built just before the most recent Chaos War," the Silver Mage said, "to keep 
things in the ruins from getting out.  Brought down by that war, at least in part.  
But..." he touched several stones lightly and smiled a little, "not completely 
useless even now and against this enemy.  Honest stonework, as you say, but there is 
a barrier spell bound within the stones, and it remains."
     "If the spell is still working, why are we worrying about the ruins?" Smeds of 
Mordant demanded.
     "Because the spell will not keep working much longer."  Tensekai frowned across 
the wall into the city.  "It was a good wall and a good spell, but it won't hold 
Folstrom forever.  Nothing--"  He stopped and looked uncomfortable.
     "You were going to say that nothing will hold the Folstrom forever?" Sputter of 
Dwes Eg asked.
     Tensekai shrugged.  "No absolute statement like that should be trusted, but I 
can honestly say that nothing we've found so far, except raw Chaos, will stop them.  
We have new spells, of course, but what was there to test them on?  We don't know."
     "Yes, okay, but what are we supposed to be DOING here, then?" Lavender Lance of 
Illis asked.
     "You must observe," the Silver Mage answered promptly.  "And I must go with you, 
because there are some things ONLY a mage can observe.  If we can find the keystone 
of the spell that holds the towers up, we could destroy it, yes, and it might be a 
good thing to do so, but the towers are just a symptom.  There are more dangerous 
things in Old Valamantis than just the towers."
     "Those things being?" Smeds cut in.
     "The wizards, obviously," Lavender Lance snapped.
     "Again, just a symptom," Tensekai said.  "Dangerous, yes, very dangerous, 
     Ka D'Argo, who had never been described as stupid, even by his enemies, nodded 
slightly.  "The wizards in Old Valamantis were resurrected along with the city," he 
said slowly.  "You think there might be some way for them to reach other wizards, 
other Folstrom, of THIS time, don't you?  That's what we have to prevent."
     Tensekai nodded.
     "How?" Smeds demanded.
     "I'm not sure," the Silver Mage admitted.  "Killing the resurrected wizards 
might do it."
     "But you don't think that's enough, do you?" Goblin said.
     "No.  I think we'll have to destroy the old city again," Tensekai answered.  
"And that won't be easy with all the blood that's been spilled there.  Not when blood 
magic is at its strongest, as now."
     "But it can be done?" Smeds asked.
     "To get rid of bloodstains, soak in cold water and hand-wash," Lavender Lance 
     Tensekai turned toward her slowly, eyes wide.  "WHAT did you say?"
     The Illisni gladiator backed up a couple of steps in the face of his intensity.  
"It's how you get bloodstains out of cloth.  Soak it in cold water--"
     "Yes!"  The mage stared around almost feverishly.  "We'll need a LOT of cold 
     "Ice," Smeds suggested.  "From the mountains above Khalhums.  Dwarves can do 
that."  He glanced at Shamu, who nodded.  "We're on it."  The two Dwarves stepped 
aside, muttering together about sledges and sawdust.
     "If the wizards now in Old Valamantis realize we're trying to... quench the 
blood magic, they'll move to stop us," Ka D'Argo said.  "So securing the arena and a 
route of access will be our job."
     "And if any wizards get killed in the process..." Goblin bared his fangs, "too 
bad for them."

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         ---===DELARQUAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 495): SMEDS of THE BLACK COMPANY (Darkfist, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 380): TOOFLESS of GLORY BOUND TROLLS (DeGotti, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 500): HARALDUR of AESIR (Buri, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 496): MARCH MADNESS of SPORTZ! (Guardian, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 495): FRIED TWINKIE of MORE NEW TEAMS 2 (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 499): ZEP of IRON BROTHERS (?, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 496): GOOBATRON of FLOWER CHILDREN (Ebenezer Frothingslosh)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 491): VAPID VANNA of SPRINGBORN (Still, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 482): PARALLAX of MAD SCIENTISTS (Neon Necromancer, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 481): MR. TWISTER of IRONIC TAILS (Mr. Twister, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 455): HALO 14 of BLIND HYPOCRISY (Jekyll, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 446): UHLEK of DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 194): SKULK of CHEAP SHOTS (?, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 432): ANN ARTICHOKE of DELVERS (Nick, mgr.)
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 381): APPLE of FRUITS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 181): MOUSETRAP of USELESS TOOLS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 169): MACAULIFFE of THE EXPLORERS (Kellog, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 146): 2 PHAT of VERMIN (Sultan, mgr.)
ADM 104 DARKHOLM (turn 374): LARGE SPINNY GUY of DIABLO TOO from TI (The Muffin Man)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   1 MORDANT (turn 495): KING'S TEN (?, mgr.)
 DM   2 NIANIA (turn 380): GLORY BOUND TROLLS (DeGotti, mgr.)
 DM   3 OSKSI (turn 500): SIMPLY DESSERTS (Sweet Tooth, mgr.)
 DM   4 JHELUM (turn 496): SUPERIOR FORCES ZC2 (Manager, mgr.)
 DM   5 KALTOS (turn 495): THE TAKEN (Silver Stroke, mgr.)
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 499): BATTLE BEASTS (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 496): FLOWER CHILDREN (Ebenezer Frothingslosh, mgr.)
 DM  10 KOLACT (turn 491): DEVIL'S ADVOCATE (Assamite, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 482): BIG MEAN FISH (Big Wave Dave, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 481): COSMIC FREAK OUT (Floyd, mgr.)
 DM  36 JHANS (turn 455): KAMIKAZI (Turtle, mgr.)
 DM  38 CLIFFHOME (turn 446): DENNY'S BKFAST (T'Loi, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 194): CHEAP SHOTS (?, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 432): none
 DM  51 TRICORUS (turn 381): FRUITS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 181): PLAGUES (Abarsis, the Slaughter Priest, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 169): THE EXPLORERS (Kellog, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 331): SRETSAMLEUD (Phat Phat, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 146): X-POSSE (Savant, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM   6 TRANSEL (turn 499): MEDUSA of BATTLE BEASTS (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
                (turn 498): RED FUSION of IT'S NEW! (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM   7 BONSUR (turn 496): GOOBATRON of FLOWER CHILDREN (Ebenezer Frothingslosh)
                           SUGARBEET of SUGAR AND SPICE (Mannequin, mgr.)
               (turn 495): HOOSIER DADDY of FLOWER CHILDREN (Ebenezer Frothingslosh)
                           JERICO of MORGAN'S BOYS (A-Sop, mgr.)
 DM  18 TALCAMA (turn 482): MORROCCO MOLE of BEAST MASTERS (The Druid, mgr.)
                            TALON of GET OUTTA MY WAY (Floyd, mgr.)
                            HO HUM HO of CENTER FOR OLDS (Suave, mgr.)
                (turn 481): DALLAS of SUPERIOR FORCES 6N (Manager, mgr.)
 DM  21 SUNSET (turn 480): GLIMMOR of GRIM FANDANGO (Stik, mgr.)
                  (turn 445): NUTCRACKER of ALL FINESSE (Mannequin, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 194): TAMMY FAYE of WITLESS WONDERS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  42 RODEKI (turn 432): GATE WITCH of FLAGG'S FIVE (Flagg, mgr.)
 DM  62 VALAMANTIS (turn 331): SPENCER of THE BOLT (Hombre, mgr.)
                   (turn 330): AKLAR of MITHRAL HALO (Barnabas, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Well, I'm impressed with myself, Yankee Dan.  But... maybe next time you should 
leave off the over-sized shoes, hmm?

                                        Ann Artichoke

                                      SPY REPORT

     It's me, The Unknown Spymaster, back to give you this week's Spy Report.  Sit 
back in your seats and we'll have more fun than a barrel of Zontanis.  We now have a 
new top team for all of you guys to dogpile on.  COLOR ME SUAVE now holds the crown 
and they are betting they can keep it.  Hey everybody, watch out for VIRTUOS VIXEN, 
who flew up 23 points in the rankings after mashing DANGEROUS CRIMINAL like a melon.  
Keep your eye on this gal.  Ya know, some days it doesn't pay to walk out on the 
sands.  EL RIPPOFF lost to GUNSLINGER and drops 19 points.  YANKEE DAN got through to 
the Duelmaster this turn.  No doubt he was more than anxious to kick ANN ARTICHOKE's 
tail out of the throne!  Well, everybody's pal ANN ARTICHOKE moved hers record to 
22-12-0 by defeating YANKEE DAN in the Duelmaster's Title Bout and gaining 13 
recognition points.  4 out of 5 gladiators surveyed protect the body, so try and 
avoid aiming at that location.   
     Let's dig a little deeper into what's happening in the RODEKI arena.  And hey, 
kiddies, those of you who didn't avoid FLAGG'S FIVE, please raise you hand.  Wow.  
Does RODEKI really have that many liars?  And you guys like to boo me?  Well, unsling 
your rasberries, cause MEMPHIS MAFIA beats feet every time FLAGG'S FIVE smiles at 
them.  Try farming, eh?  Well dang howdy, but if challenges were votes, SUSHEE SU 
would be president.  Although it may be a contest she doesn't want to win.  In a 
touching display by a 'touched' warrior, MASUMII went after 1977 AMC MATADOR, who was 
higher by 21 points.  Well, when the dust settled, MASUMII was defeated by 1977 AMC 
     Being a spy is great--other people die and you spend the rest of the day 
drinking to their memory.  Better tanked than dead!  Big deal, so GATE WITCH got 
mashed in the Dark Arena.  With hers face she was more at home with the trolls than 
with us. (Waka waka).  GATE WITCH says to hers dog--'Who should I fight this week?'.  
Dog says 'MOUNTAIN TROLL'.  So the gal dies.  Moral?  Put lying dogs to sleep.  
Congrats to FUZZY BUZZCUT for revenging the death of its teammate (but more 
importantly, feeding NEON NECROBOOKIE a bit of dirt).  Here's some advice:  warriors 
with little wit and will may encounter problems on the trail to the Isle.   
     I think I had better cut this one short.  It's been nice chatting to those of 
you whom I have not offended yet.  C'mon, Leadfoot, let's make some tracks.  And 
remember, you can pick your friends and you can pick your--(loud boos), oh, you've 
heard that one already!-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ANN ARTICHOKE 3984           22  12  0   123       DELVERS (154)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LIMPY TWO-SCREWS 4048        14   7  0   102       COLOR ME SUAVE (322)
 GUNSLINGER 1587              16  20  2    96       KING'S KREW (151)
 YANKEE DAN 4019              20   8  0    94       CLOWNING AROUND (354)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FUZZY BUZZCUT 4024           17   9  0    88       COLOR ME SUAVE (322)
 GEORGE STARK 1589            17  22  0    84       KING'S KREW (151)
 EL RIPPOFF 3992              17  15  0    83       DELVERS (154)
 SUSHEE SU 3983               13  21  0    70       DELVERS (154)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BOZO 4016                    11  17  0    62       CLOWNING AROUND (354)
 JOHN ROSE 3985               11  23  0    60       DELVERS (154)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 NEON NECROBOOKIE 4113         3   2  1    56       MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)
 1977 AMC MATADOR 4116         6   0  0    52       COLOR ME SUAVE (322)
 VIRTUOS VIXEN 4092            6   2  0    49       FLAGG'S FIVE (213)
 CRIX BREMOORE 4091            5   3  1    39       FLAGG'S FIVE (213)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ADASHIR 4088                  2   1  0    32       HIGHER PURPOSE (363)
-BREW-HA-HA 4114               2   2  1    31       MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)
-RIGHT-WING PIMP 4111          2   2  1    29       MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 THE MOLE 4118                 5   0  1    25       DELVERS (154)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BEN MEARS 3280                6   5  0    23       KING'S KREW (151)
 MASUMII 4117                  3   2  0    22       FLAGG'S FIVE (213)
 NESSA 4090                    2   1  1    14       HIGHER PURPOSE (363)
 ALARIC 4086                   2   1  0    14       HIGHER PURPOSE (363)
 RONALD MCDONALD 4041          1   0  0    13       CLOWNING AROUND (354)
-J.T. MONEY$$ 4110             1   3  0     6       MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)
 BADUNKADUNK 4119              0   4  0     4       MEMPHIS MAFIA (367)
 DR. HOOK 4125                 0   2  0     2       KING'S KREW (151)
 TORTURE KING 4128             0   1  0     1       FLAGG'S FIVE (213)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
HAIRLIP BOMBSHEL 4067  3 10 1 COLOR ME SUAVE 322    BREW-HA-HA 4114       432         
GATE WITCH 3953       22 10 0 FLAGG'S FIVE 213      MOUNTAIN TROLL 18     433 NONE    
ERGOE 4127             0  1 0 HIGHER PURPOSE 363    WURM KIN 27           433 NONE    
DARIUS 4087            1  2 1 HIGHER PURPOSE 363    THE MOLE 4118         433         
GERALD 3281            3  8 0 KING'S KREW 151       HIGH ELF 19           433 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Ann Artichoke -- Thanks for helping me look like a world class clown! -- Yankee Dan, 
P.S.  I thought we were supposed to be using rubber weapons.  Those real Scimitars 
really hurt!  Really Really Hurt!

Bookie -- The only thing better than the personalized quotes is having a warrior that 
actually uses them!  Hope you enjoyed the act. -- Assur

Hopefully this actor won't quit on me, but the Clowning Around management is proud to 
introduce perhaps the single most famous clown in the world, Ronald McDonald!

John Rose -- Well hopefully that Dan guy will graduate real soon and neither one of 
us will have to put up with him any longer! -- Bozo

Suave -- My condolences!  Maybe if I somehow get mine out, I can give him to you to 
play with in ADM... -- Assur

Bookie -- You're a bad man!  Looks like you were going for at least 3, too.  Lucky 
for me Bozo can take a couple head shots and not crumple.  You  realize, of course, 
that because you killed Golden Boy, Suave is gonna give you the business! -- Assur

The Mole -- As you can tell by now, I am significantly shorter. -- Ghost of Verus

Assurbloodinbloodoutbashermaniacburpenheimer -- I think Flagg set me up to challenge 
Bozo again this turn. All in the name of skills, of course. -- Crix

J.T. Money$$ -- That was fun, we'll have to do it again in a couple of turns. -- Crix

All -- I would like to thank all of you for the fun I had while here in town. I think 
I'm off to Isle obscurity now, but Flagg hasn't made up his mind for sure. -- Gate 
Witch #2, who dearly misses her twin.

Gerald -- Send me a lightning pigeon... flagg_dragonsreign@yahoo.com . I have some 
things to discuss with you and your manager. It might be worth your time. -- Masumii

     "Lightning pigeon"?  I LIKE that. -- Temp Ed.

Badunkadunk -- Sheesh, that was an ugly win for me -- Virtuos Vixen

Harby -- Send me a lightning pigeon too, same address as above. I've got some stuff 
to discuss with you as well. -- Flagg

Suave -- Something's not right around here when you or I don't have a warrior on the 
throne.  I think Harby has something up her sleeve. -- Flagg

Farnham -- WELCOME!!!  Glad to have you here!  May my home be your home and may the 
rollup gods bless your team for the next year (or so, depending on how fickle they 
are). -- Flagg

Suave -- Wait a minute!!! I just noticed the two major losses you had last turn! Dude 
that sucks!  I was rooting for Golden Boy of Bass! -- Flagg

Ben Mears -- Phhhhhhbbbbbblllllllttttt!!! -- Virtuos Vixen

Editor -- Duel2???  Duel2???  I think we can do better than that!  The forum boards 
have been lit up with discussion as to a different name.  For me, it shall always be 

Suave -- Well damn.  I know this won't bring them back but I didn't mean to kill 
those two.  In fact I'm mad about it myself.  Those two were teaching quite well.  So 
you know Brew-ha-ha just reached 4 FE so he's sitting out.  However, Necrobookie 
needs 4 more fights so he will be3 available for you to bloodfeud.  If he likes he 
should learn well.  Here's your chance...come and get him. -- Bookie

Flagg -- Did you apologize for a 14 point downchallenge. (snicker)  Oh it's ok.  I'd 
downchallenge my own mamma so how can I take offense? -- Bookie

Fuzzy Buzzcut -- Yah!  Yer mother dresses you funny! -- El Rippoff

George Stark -- That was starkly something-or-other. -- John "call me professor" Rose

Who let that silly concubine loose? -- Sushee Su

Dr. Hook -- (surprised look)  Gotcha! -- The Mole

Flagg -- You've got reason to feel anxious!  I'm sure your good Lady Flagg would not 
turn against you, but if that madman Adabemis & Balmador thinks she MIGHT... well, 
I'd watch out for dark alleys and so on. -- Harby
P.S.  I will try to get some kind of a report on the "plot"--if a madman can plot at 
all--but there seems to be a problem with my scribing device.  The suggestion is 
"intermittent failure of the cpu fan," whatever that means.  I don't understand these 
complicated machines.  Give me a pickaxe, and I know where I am.

14 April 2004
CHAOS Inc. proudly announces our newest member, Silver Stroke.  He becomes the
seventh brother of Chaos.  We shall indeed be better for his joining.

6 May 2004
                                     DEATH FEST

     The ferocious ghosts of former glories whispered across the wind swept sands of
DM 59; agonizing incessantly due to the diminutive demise of the Delarq arena known
as Illis.
     Tattered banners and forgotten memories wailed in the wind for a dynamic death
march to dawn once more upon the blood stained sands of the Delarq slow arena.
     The distant call crying for  a declaration of restoration amidst the ruin of the
all but forgotten Delarq arena carried to the far corners of Alastari; drawing the
Devious, the Diabolical, the Dangerous and the Down Challenging to cross blades and
wage warfare among an assemblage of new stables managed by the Known and Unknown;
willing to spill fresh blood, while carving their destiny during 15 Rounds of contest
driven combat to be known as the "Illis Incredibly Diabolical Delarq Death Fest".
     A lone cloaked figure huddled by lamplight in a remote outpost near the
crossroads of ElseWhere and ElseWhen; feverishly formulating the foundational
framework for the dawning of the Delarq Death Fest in DM 59, complete with
Gladiatorial Commission sanctioned prizes to promote the growing thirst for a Delarq
Slow Arena Death Festival.

     Delarq Death Fest Opening Round debuts the first turn immediately following the
Summer 2004 F2F Tourney and continues through the completion of 15 consecutive
     Death Fest points are Won or Lost ONLY in the DM 59 Delarq Slow Arena [Tourneys
DO NOT Add or Subtract from the Death Fest Point Scoring System]:

Death Fest Scoring Format:
Win =3D +2 pts
Loss =3D -1 pt
Kill =3D +5 pts [in addition to +2 pts for Win]
Death =3D -3 pts [in addition to 1 pt for Loss]
Dark Arena Kill =3D +10 pts [in addition to +2 pts for Win]
Dark Arena Death =3D -5 pts [in addition to 1 pt for Loss]
Revenged Blood Feud =3D +5 pts [successful Revenged Blood Feud provides Death Fest
contestants the opportunity to cancel out 3 pts for Death and 1 pt for Loss; while
gaining +1 pt overall for the Revenged Blood Feud in addition to the +2 pts for Win]

    DEATH FEST PRIZES will be awarded to the Top Ten Death Fest Stables on the basis
of Total Points*** accumulated during the 15 rounds of competition as follows:

1.  Favorite Weapon Knowledge for 1 (one) warrior ranked Initiate or higher on the
Final Round to be revealed by RSI to each of the Top Ten Death Fest Stables
2.  Renaming of Dark Arena Monsters and NPCs [yet to be determined according to how
many DA Monsters and NPCs are available in DM 59 for Renaming]
3.  The Top Five Death Fest Stables will receive New Team Rollup Certificates as
follows:  1st (10), 2nd (8), 3rd (6), 4th (4) and 5th (2)
4.  Renaming Illis Arena for 6 months plus Receiving 6 months Free Play courtesy of
RSI will be awarded to the manager of the 1st Place Death Fest Stable
5.  Discussions are underway regarding a possible Special Award granted to the Illis
Iron Stable qualifiers who compete in 67 of a possible 75 fights during the course of
the 15 consecutive rounds of the Death Fest [Key Factor is How Many (?) stables will
be competing in the Death Fest without drawing away participation by current managers
in the remaining slow arenas!]  Therefore, it is important for all managers entering
stables in DM 59 for the upcoming Death Fest to contact RSI as soon as possible
regarding their participation in this contest so that a Final Ruling on the proposed
Illis Iron Stable Award can be issued by RSI.

***TieBreaker is determined on the Final Round by the DM 59 Newsletter Recognition
Rankings.  The stable with the Highest Ranked Active Gladiator is granted the
decision.  [Example: Warrior A and Warrior B are both listed in the Recognition
Rankings with 87 pts; however, because Warrior A is listed in the Recognition
Rankings ahead of Warrior B, then Warrior A is granted the TieBreaker Decision for
His/Her stable!]

     Opening Round Team Spotlight Bonus [minimum 15 paragraphs!]  Each Delarq Death
Fest competitor who writes a Team Spotlight featuring their Stable (Name) and
Managerial Alias [Gladiatorial Names Optional] in regards to competing in the Delarq
Death Fest will receive 25 pts added to His/Her opening round score.
     Illis Iron Stable Bonus [in addition to the proposed award awaiting RSI
approval!]  Any manager whose stable competes in at least 67 of the possible 75
fights during the 15 rounds of Death Fest receives 25 points added to His/Her final
overall score [this allows each stable the cushion of missing one round of
competition; plus up to 3 additional fights due to waiting for replacement rollups
from Deaths suffered either in Tourneys or during the Death Fest contest in DM 59
over the course of 15 rounds of competition!]

Delarq Death Fest
Hosted by Hammer
[Who Else?]

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

GATE WITCH was unbelievably slain by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 3 minute Dark Arena fight.
GERALD was murdered by HIGH ELF in a 1 minute brutal Dark Arena melee.
ERGOE was assassinated by WURM KIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
FUZZY BUZZCUT slimly won victory over NEON NECROBOOKIE in a 3 minute contest.
YANKEE DAN was viciously subdued by ANN ARTICHOKE in a 5 minute Challenge Title brawl.
GEORGE STARK was savagely defeated by LIMPY TWO-SCREWS in a 3 minute Challenge brawl.
BOZO was viciously subdued by SUSHEE SU in a 1 minute expert's Challenge duel.
MASUMII was vanquished by 1977 AMC MATADOR in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
EL RIPPOFF was defeated by GUNSLINGER in a popular 1 minute expert's match.
JOHN ROSE defeated CRIX BREMOORE in a crowd pleasing 2 minute one-sided match.
VIRTUOS VIXEN handily defeated DANGEROUS CRIMINAL in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
BEN MEARS was devastated by ADASHIR in a 1 minute bloody mismatched bout.
NESSA savagely defeated DR. HOOK in a 2 minute bloody novice's duel.
ALARIC vanquished TORTURE KING in a 2 minute one-sided fray.
DARIUS was barely slain by THE MOLE in a 2 minute amateur's brawl.
BADUNKADUNK was overpowered by RONALD MCDONALD in a 1 minute one-sided bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         PARRY-STRIKE       8 -   2 -  1      80  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   5         TOTAL PARRY       16 -  13 -  0      55  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   4         AIMED BLOW         6 -   5 -  0      55  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  4         PARRY-RIPOSTE     15 -  13 -  0      54  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         WALL OF STEEL     18 -  17 -  0      51  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      3         BASHING ATTACK    20 -  19 -  0      51  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         STRIKING ATTACK    1 -   1 -  0      50  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         LUNGING ATTACK    21 -  21 -  3      50  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  1         SLASHING ATTACK   12 -  16 -  3      43  |
|AIMED BLOW                       0         PARRY-LUNGE        7 -  13 -  0      35  |

Turn 433 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  2         3  BASHING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    1 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  3         2  PARRY-RIPOSTE  
WALL OF STEEL      4 -  1     AIMED BLOW         0 -  0         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     3 -  2     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  2         2  TOTAL PARRY    
LUNGING ATTACK     2 -  2     TOTAL PARRY        0 -  3         2  WALL OF STEEL  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
PARRY-RIPOSTE    ANN ARTICHOKE 3984         22  12  0  123 DELVERS (154)
LUNGING ATTACK   LIMPY TWO-SCREWS 4048      14   7  0  102 COLOR ME SUAVE (322)
TOTAL PARRY      YANKEE DAN 4019            20   8  0   94 CLOWNING AROUND (354)
BASHING ATTACK   FUZZY BUZZCUT 4024         17   9  0   88 COLOR ME SUAVE (322)
WALL OF STEEL    1977 AMC MATADOR 4116       6   0  0   52 COLOR ME SUAVE (322)
SLASHING ATTACK  CRIX BREMOORE 4091          5   3  1   39 FLAGG'S FIVE (213)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is GUNSLINGER 1587.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was ANN ARTICHOKE 3984.  The ten other most popular fighters were LIMPY TWO-SCREWS 

The least popular fighter this week was BADUNKADUNK 4119.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were DR. HOOK 4125, BOZO 4016, ERGOE 4127, GERALD 3281, THE MOLE 
4118, BEN MEARS 3280, EL RIPPOFF 3992, RONALD MCDONALD 4041, TORTURE KING 4128, and 
ALARIC 4086.

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

GATE WITCH (42-3953) FLAGG'S FIVE (213)