Date   : 04/24/2006    Duedate: 05/06/2006


DM-46    TURN-473

This Weeks Top Honors


(46-3404) [13-8-0,95]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

GLOW-ROOM                      POSITION IS EMPTY
FANDILS (75)                   
(46-3404) [13-8-0,95]          

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

(46-3850) [14-18-1,61]         (46-3459) [7-2-2,52]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. FANDILS (75)                36
3. INFERNAL LORDS (8)           5      Unchartered Team
4. RUBY DRAGONS (336)           0
5. DEATH (349)                  0       (129)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1 CYNICAL DELUSIONS (218)  211 131 12 61.7   1/ 1 FANDILS (75)              8  3 2
 2/ 2 FANDILS (75)             772 596 26 56.4   2/ 4 CYNICAL DELUSIONS (218)   6  2 0
 3/ 3 INFERNAL LORDS (8)       166 140 10 54.2   3/ 2 INFERNAL LORDS (8)        5  4 0
 4/ 4 RUBY DRAGONS (336)       107  98  2 52.2   4/ 3 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)   3 12 0
 5/ 5 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)  371 561 11 39.8   5/ 5 RUBY DRAGONS (336)        2  1 0
 6- 6*DEATH (349)                2   8  1 20.0   6- 6*DEATH (349)               1  4 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

              + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Nightfall #19 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

     "Yes...I suppose," Stepharoo answered.  She stared down, then ahead.  "We could
jump."  Her tone was doubtful.
     Eclipse shared her doubt.  This was mythic, and it should be testing qualities
they were supposed to have.  Jumping was not something that had figured in his life,
or he suspected in hers, in any kind of serious way.  It wasn't the nature of humans
to jump broad chasms, and it wasn't part of their training as gladiators, either.  So
jumping was probably not the key here.  "The first test should be a fairly easy one,"
he said after a moment's thought.  "Just to let us know that it is NOT a walk in the
park, but not enough to discourage before we get anywhere.  There is an easy solution
to this, if we apply ourselves to it and use our talents."
     "I don't have a talent for--"
     "And no negative thinking!"
     "Oh...right."  She was silent for a moment.  "This whole thing's about Balance,
isn't it?"
     If he hadn't been wearing a helmet, Eclipse was sure the hair would be standing
straight up on his head.  Because as she spoke, a thin silver line appeared crossing
the chasm.
     As thin as a tightrope.
     They both stared at it in silence for a moment, and while they watched, their
Guiding Footsteps moved forward.  It should have been impossible to see them on such
a narrow rope, but it was not.  They moved steadily ahead, not fast, but never
     "We can't do this holding hands," Eclipse said.
     "True."  She paused.  The footsteps kept going.  "I feel okay about this, so how
about me going first, you coming right behind, close enough to...no, you need your
arms to balance.  Oh, right, lay your staff across my shoulder, that will maintain
the contact."
     Without surprise, Eclipse saw that he was now holding a staff of some medium-
brown wood, smooth except for the leaves sprouting from the tip.  Undoubtedly mythic.
"Right.  Let's do it."
     Stepharoo took a deep breath and stepped out onto the tightrope with one foot.
Eclipse laid the leafy end of his staff on her left shoulder, keeping his right hand
free to help balance.  She took another step, looking straight ahead, both feet over
the chasm now.  A third step.
     Eclipse stepped out onto the rope behind her.  It pressed against the sole of
his foot, toes to heel, and seemed very...thin.  Maybe so, but, he told himself
firmly, it was steady.  Solid.  Not all that tricky, he just had to pay attention and
not get distracted.  He could do this.  His confidence rose.  He COULD do this.
Step, step, step.  Steady did the trick.  He felt like whistling.  Maybe doing a
little jig-step.  No, not that.  But--
     A wind blew.  Where had that come from?  There hadn't been a breath of movement
in the air up until now, but now...it was flowing past him, increasing speed, making
the rope under his feet quiver and hum.  He tensed, then relaxed because tension
would not help him here.  Forced himself to be calm, which is a lot harder than it
sounds like.  Balanced.
     The staff twitched in his hand.  He looked forward quickly.  Stepharoo was
across!  And he only had four feet to go, himself.  Two longish steps--  He stretched
to plant his foot as far ahead as he could.  That made it trickier to balance
himself.  He couldn't shift his weight far enough to take the next step.  Over-
extended.  How dumb could he be?  The staff twitched again.  He looked up.
     Stepharoo had turned to face him, and she was gripping the leafy end of the
staff with both hands.  Her feet were planted in a firm stance.  "I've got it," she
said.  "I can hold this end steady."
     "Right...."  Eclipse steadied himself against her grip, shifted his weight, took
two more careful, unhurried steps.  Made it to the other side of the chasm.  "Thanks.
I got a little impatient there.  Have to watch that."
     Stepharoo shrugged and grimaced.  "I almost did that same thing myself, but you
were holding the staff steady on my shoulder and I would have had to move out from
under it.  And I'd probably have fallen.  Same thing, impatience.  So....  Thanks."
     "Like the Magician said, a winning combination."  He moved up to stand beside
her again, and they leaned shoulder into shoulder for a moment, glad of the
     In front of them, the footsteps flickered.  As though their invisible guide was
tapping his foot.
     Eclipse sighed.  "Onward."
     "We're almost to the mountains," Stepharoo added.
     He looked up.  It was true.  The mountains didn't precisely look close, but the
plain between the chasm and the sawtoothed skyline looked narrow.  "Something to look
forward to," he muttered.

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                          ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 269): INOCHI of YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 539): JEREMIAH JAY COOKE of GERFEL'S FRIENDS (Generalissimo
                               Puerco, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 539): LITTLE DEVIL of PLAYPEN (KAT, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 532): BIFF STREICHER of MEDIEVAL CHAOS (Huckle Cat, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 528): INNY MEANIE of MONEY PIT (Papaiz, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 528): BLOODSHED of MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 526): BALTIMORE of HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 521): PASTOR PENTANE of LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 490): DRIZZT of PHILANTHROPISTS (Aragorn, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 481): 5 GOT PICKED of 072905R (The Muffin Man, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 472): GLOW-ROOM of FANDILS (Wise Old Fandil, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 216): INSOLENT IRIS of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 388): ONE-TIMER of DEATH STUDS VII (Death Stud, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 376): BOUNCING BEA of WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)
                            (JRK, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 269): YAKUZA (Sensei Jan, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 539): JGW EXPIRATION (JGW, mgr.)
 DM  14 TOBIR (turn 539): PLAYPEN (KAT, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 532): JUST CHILLIN (Mr. Freeze, mgr.)
 DM  24 ZORPUNT (turn 528): MONEY PIT (Papaiz, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 528): MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 526): HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 521): LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 490): DI$C0MBU1@TED (Valamond, mgr.)
 DM  41 KATI-TEI (turn 481): WANDERERS (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  46 ARDIVENT (turn 472): FANDILS (Wise Old Fandil, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 216): SILVER KNIGHTS (Dark Knight Toker, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 388): SILENT WARRIORS (Ganolus Oakleaf, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 376): THE SUN CULT (Noachian, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 171): HAZAARDS OF CLONING (Crip, mgr.)
ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 424): KNIGHTS OF VIRTUE, etc. (JRK, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 268): TOM SAWYER of SMITHSONIAN (The Curator, mgr.)
 DM  11 ARUAK CITY (turn 538): JO MOONCATCHER of KRILL CAVALRY (Leeta, mgr.)
 DM  22 SOLVEN (turn 532): ZEBROE of THE ZOO (Leeta, mgr.)
               (turn 531): BLIZZARD of JUST CHILLIN (Mr. Freeze, mgr.)
 DM  25 LYRATILAN (turn 528): BLOODSHED of MADTOWN (Namenlos, mgr.)
 DM  26 CALEAM (turn 526): BALTIMORE of HERE TO PHOENIX (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  30 IAYE (turn 521): PASTOR PENTANE of LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.)
             (turn 520): STEINBACH of THE A'S -- LOSERS II (Malaquar, mgr.)
 DM  40 ZENSU (turn 490): DRIZZT of PHILANTHROPISTS (Aragorn, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 216): TORMENT of ASSASSIN NATION (Ghab, mgr.)
 DM  60 ARADI (turn 387): HEADROCK of OGRES ARE US (Ghoti, mgr.)
 DM  63 AMEN-TEI (turn 376): HITCH HIKER of WAYFARERS (Leeta, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     What luck!  I, the Duelmaster, draw an NPC--Khalhums Dwarf--for my title
defense.  Cool!  A freebie!  I can dig it!
     I am strong, starting with six straight swipes with a crit.  I do some kind of
bounding forward for five straight times.  Another crit, breaking his morning star.
Two more swipes, one a crit, to finish him.  But wait!  Somehow he pulls out his
whiffle, pounds on me, and barrels me with a finishing medium shield!  The
    I am so bad.  What am I doing up here?  I don't deserve the title, because I
stink.  Yet, I have it.  I am Duelmaster.  (Did somebody take a vote?)
     So, Break Point and Temptation and Lori Collin, come on out and play.  I am
easy.  (Not like Mary Catherine!)  The pickin's is easy.  All I can hope for is luck.
Like this time.
     Glow Room, Duelmaster (sort of)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Welcome ARDIVENT.  I, Olaf Modeen remember this place well.  Many the fights 
have I fought here.  The celebrations, the disappointments...  What's with 
SPARROW-BLASTER?  He actually beat BLUVALLEY WARRIORS' COOLIN SCOT, and walked away 
with 15 more points from the fight.  Laughs were big at CYNICAL DELUSIONS while they 
watched SPARROW-BLASTER clobber COOLIN SCOT.  He lost 10 points and got bruised from 
objects thrown from the stands.  Try as she might, LORI COLLIN wasn't good enough at 
persuading GLOW-ROOM to step down from the Duelmaster's throne...  Wouldn't it be 
nice to have live subjects to practice on?  I hear some team is looking into the uses 
of convicted prisoners.   
     Speaking of cowardly avoiders and unfair challenges...  How well I know the 
feeling of being in the most avoided team!  Don't fall out of practive, INFERNAL 
LORDS!  Management must be dealin', as the boys at FANDILS ain't reelin'!  INFERNAL 
LORDS' mad!   
     Warriors of ARDIVENT unite.  You have only your games to lose!  MARY CATHERINE 
larned hers lesson (BREAK POINT taught it well), and we right likely won't be seein' 
'im fight any CYNICAL DELUSIONS members with the same gusto.  Is it my imagination, 
or are fighters getting younger every day?  To die so young, so gloriously!   
     Well, I'm pretty much through.  You guys need to get back practicing.  ARDIVENT 
is a nice place to live, but I don't like to live in nice places.  I don't want to 
overstay my welcome...-- Olaf Modeen  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GLOW-ROOM 3404               13   8  0    95       FANDILS (75)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BREAK POINT 2741             22  13  0    89       CYNICAL DELUSIONS (218)
 DR STEINBURGER 3442          13   2  0    78       FANDILS (75)
-TEMPTATION 3314               8   5  0    75       INFERNAL LORDS (8)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LORI COLLIN 3888              9   6  0    64       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
 BECKER COLLIN 3850           14  18  1    61       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 AZGUD 3253                    9  13  0    54       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 MARY CATHERINE 3459           7   2  2    52       FANDILS (75)
-IRONWOLF 274                  5   1  0    42       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DAVY PRIVETTE 3447            7   1  0    34       FANDILS (75)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SMILING MOUNTAIN 3896         4   2  0    31       RUBY DRAGONS (336)
 RYTHYM WIZARD 3357            4   1  0    28       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 SPARROW-BLASTER 3900          2   0  0    28       CYNICAL DELUSIONS (218)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-UG 271                        4   2  1    19       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
-KROKUS 272                    4   2  0    19       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
-TARAMON 270                   3   3  0    18       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
 DEBRA CONKLIN 3890            3   7  0    16       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
-WEASEL 273                    4   2  0    15       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
-FIIZ 3332                     2   5  0    15       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 JACINTHE 3892                 2   6  0    12       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
-THORN 3904                    1   1  0    12       DEATH (349)
 COOLIN SCOT 3897              2   4  0    10       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
 EARL & SISSY 3478             1   1  1     7       FANDILS (75)
 GALOOT 3907                   1   0  0     7       CYNICAL DELUSIONS (218)
-DREAD 3902                    1   1  1     5       DEATH (349)
 QUAR-RAL 3898                 1   0  0     3       CYNICAL DELUSIONS (218)
-HELLSPAWN 3903                0   2  0     2       DEATH (349)
 EUROQ 3901                    0   1  0     1       INFERNAL LORDS (8)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
QUARANTEEN 3899        0  1 0 CYNICAL DELUSIONS 218 EARL & SISSY 3478     473         
PUNISHMENT 3895        1  1 0 RUBY DRAGONS 336      MARY CATHERINE 3459   469 NOT REVE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

All -- Not to blame anything on bad luck but that's what happened to me.  I know some
of you were waiting on the sands ready to fight members of my team and were let down
because we ended up being no shows, however due to circumstances that crippled our
caravan we were unable to attend.  A band of murderous outlaws attacked us on the way
to Ardivent.  We were surrounded but managed to fight our way free and slaughter the
lot of them.  I hope you will understand, and we will definitely be there waiting for
any challenges.  Thanks for the apology, Fandil the Wise; we are all warriors and
mishaps happen.  Blood and Glory to all. -- Eclipse

As usual, Stepharoo seems to be having more fun that the rest of us Fandils. --
Fandil The Wise

Eclipse -- What's a damage match? -- WOF

DeGotti -- My friend, some day we must compare our puds.  It is inconceivable for me
to think your would be worse. -- Fandil

Debra Conklin -- Yeah, I know.  I didn't want to kill those junks.  Don't know what
got into me.  I like guys!  I do feel bad about it.  I will try harder. -- Mary

Becker Collin -- Thanks for being there.  Not many others were. -- Dr Steinburger

Fiiz -- Whew!  It has been a while since I have won without killing.  I feel clean!
Let's go have a beer and really cut loose.  You think? -- Mary Catherine

Death -- Welcome to the "Arena of the Red Sands." -- DeGotti

Glow-Room -- Sorry, Temptation is surrounded by really bad match ups.  She will be
sitting out until there is more of a variety for her to challenge. -- DeGotti

Eclipse -- Team of our nightmares, huh?  Well, that sounds like a fun challenge. --

Mary Catherine -- You are a mean one! -- Fiiz

WOF -- I remember Tiger Lily & Sir Smythe.  Wow, that was a long time ago.  Thanks
for keeping up with writing the DM column. -- DeGotti

Leeta/Judith -- I must say that I am enjoying the story of Eclipse and Stepharoo.
Thanks for adding to this fine arena's flair. -- DeGotti

Dr Steinburger -- Hey, doc, as long as you're here handy...I've got this ache in my
hip, you know?  Some days it's so bad I can hardly sit or stand.  Any idea what I
should do for it? -- Becker Collin

Azgud -- But not as good as me.  And you taught me six skills!  Amazing!  I really
appreciate that. -- Lori Collin
P.S.  Would you rather I brought you flowers in the Infirmary, or candy?

Smiling Mountain -- More of a smirk, if you ask me. -- Debra Conklin

Thorn -- Gosh, but you're prickly! -- Jacinthe

Dread -- Doesn't that make it hard to get a date? -- Coolin Scot, not averse,
exactly, but distinctly wary

Mary Catherine -- Oh, I do!  Honest. -- Debra Conklin

Break Point -- You are probably correct, unless one of us encounters sudden death. --
Becker Collin

DeGotti -- I thought it was Snotman that ran Wild Cards in Aradi, but I could be
wrong.  It's all a blur, especially with TOGS going on again. -- Leeta

Ed. -- Yes, and that. -- Leeta

Dr Steinburger -- (consulting his flat-rate manual)  Merely $140, unless you want the
prescription also. -- The Honest (but not cheap) merchant

28 March 2006
We of the Desolate Empire Alliance want to welcome two managers to our fold.  Kon of
the Empire Rising, and Osiris!  May they be blessed with the blood of their enemies,
and give no quarter in War! -- Dark Knights of the Desolate Empire

11 April 2006
To all those lookin' for some easy pickins:  I, Elfwine, manager of The Shallowship,
the most feared team in all of Jhelum, invite all who seek wide open spaces for pubs
and other such establishments of limited debauchery, to visit this deserted city and
help me clear up some of the dust.  I'm just about ready to have my guys face off
against each other to get some new action.  Guess I'd better join a tournament or
something...hmmmm, there's a thought.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

BREAK POINT slimly won victory over MARY CATHERINE in a 3 minute Bloodfeud fight.
GLOW-ROOM demolished LORI COLLIN in a popular 1 minute one-sided Title melee.
DR STEINBURGER vanquished BECKER COLLIN in a 3 minute mismatched brawl.
AZGUD defeated SMILING MOUNTAIN in a exciting 1 minute fight.
RYTHYM WIZARD viciously subdued JACINTHE in a 2 minute gruesome brawl.
DAVY PRIVETTE savagely defeated DEBRA CONKLIN in a 5 minute brutal struggle.
COOLIN SCOT was devastated by SPARROW-BLASTER in a 1 minute one-sided competition.
EARL & SISSY dispatched QUARANTEEN in a 2 minute gruesome beginner's duel.
QUAR-RAL outlasted EUROQ in a slow 12 minute beginner's duel.
GALOOT defeated POLITE BEGGAR in a tiring 5 minute beginner's match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         PARRY-STRIKE       3 -   0 -  0     100  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  3         TOTAL PARRY       17 -   5 -  0      77  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         BASHING ATTACK     8 -   4 -  2      67  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  2         AIMED BLOW         3 -   2 -  0      60  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   2         LUNGING ATTACK     3 -   2 -  1      60  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    2         SLASHING ATTACK   11 -   8 -  0      58  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         PARRY-LUNGE        8 -  10 -  0      44  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   1         STRIKING ATTACK   11 -  16 -  1      41  |
|AIMED BLOW                       1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      3 -   7 -  0      30  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         WALL OF STEEL      3 -   7 -  0      30  |

Turn 473 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  0     AIMED BLOW         0 -  1         2  BASHING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     1 -  0     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         2  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        4 -  0     STRIKING ATTACK    0 -  3         2  PARRY-LUNGE    
PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  1                                       2  STRIKING ATTACK
SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  1                                       1  LUNGING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     1 -  1                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL      1 -  1                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
BASHING ATTACK   GLOW-ROOM 3404             13   8  0   95 FANDILS (75)
TOTAL PARRY      BREAK POINT 2741           22  13  0   89 CYNICAL DELUSIONS (218)
SLASHING ATTACK  LORI COLLIN 3888            9   6  0   64 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
WALL OF STEEL    DAVY PRIVETTE 3447          7   1  0   34 FANDILS (75)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is BECKER COLLIN 3850.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was MARY CATHERINE 3459.  The ten other most popular fighters were RYTHYM WIZARD 

The least popular fighter this week was QUAR-RAL 3898.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were GALOOT 3907, DEBRA CONKLIN 3890, QUARANTEEN 3899, EUROQ 3901, COOLIN 
3478, and DAVY PRIVETTE 3447.