DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 06/04/2007    Duedate: 06/16/2007

ARDIVENT ARENA

DM-46    TURN-502

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

JHEZRA STEELBLADE
TUFT-TASTIC! (265)
(46-3017) [15-11-0,119]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

JHEZRA STEELBLADE              CROSSEYED MARY
TUFT-TASTIC! (265)             SONS OF TULL (360)
(46-3017) [15-11-0,119]        (46-3999) [3-2-0,33]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

JUANITA                        HAIRY BEAR
FANDILS (75)                   THE BEARS II (355)
(46-3926) [16-8-0,90]          (46-3939) [6-2-0,72]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

FANDILS (75)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. RIVER WARDENS (184)         32
2. FANDILS (75)                28      TUFT-TASTIC! (265)
3. WILD OATS (248)             27      Unchartered Team
4. SONS OF TULL (360)          24
5. BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)     23      SONS OF TULL (360)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 1*BLACK COLOSSUS (359)       2   0  0  100   1/ 1 FANDILS (75)              9  4 0
 2/ 2 TUFT-TASTIC! (265)       114  79  2 59.1   2/ 2 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)   8  7 0
 3/ 3 FANDILS (75)             849 637 27 57.1   3/ 3 WILD OATS (248)           7  7 0
 4/ 5 INFERNAL LORDS (8)       202 173 12 53.9   4/ 5 TUFT-TASTIC! (265)        5  8 0
 5/ 4 THE BEARS II (355)        18  16  3 52.9   5/ 6*SONS OF TULL (360)        5 10 0
 6/ 6 WILD OATS (248)           32  30  1 51.6   6- 4*WOE TO WHITECHAPEL (358)  4  4 0
 7/ 0 RIVER WARDENS (184)       76  92  8 45.2   7- 7*BLACK COLOSSUS (359)      2  0 0
 8/ 7*SONS OF TULL (360)        11  14  0 44.0   8/ 0 RIVER WARDENS (184)       2  2 0
 9- 8*WOE TO WHITECHAPEL (358)  16  25  0 39.0   9/ 8 INFERNAL LORDS (8)        2  3 0
10/ 9 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)  416 656 13 38.8  10/ 9 THE BEARS II (355)        1  5 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

         + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ Cities by the Shore #16 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Aruak City, the Bulldog Inn:

     "Things are worse than they look," Kennelworth said.  The old innkeeper rubbed
his forehead.  "I don't know where to start in telling you--"
     "Start with the plague," Fandil suggested.  "We've heard that has reappeared."
     Kennelworth shrugged.  "Something LIKE the plague, but I'm not sure it's the
same."
     "Unintended shape-change, with the Aruaki being unable to change back?" Adie
asked.
     "That, yes, but that's the least of it.  A lot of the people who change die
immediately, sometimes in the process of changing."  He grimaced.  "Very...
unpleasant to clean up after.  The ones who survive either go on a bloody rampage--"
     "Instinctively seeking the power of blood magic to restore themselves?" Fandil
theorized.
     "How should I know?  The ones that don't go all-out for blood fade away, wither,
as though they were aging fifty years in an hour, and they die of it.  This is not a
good time to be Aruaki."
     "And probably no better a time to be Narsh Utur, even though their origin is a
little different," Fandil said.  "I wonder if it would help to know exactly what the
old magicians put into their spells when they were creating the Aruaki?"
     "Maybe," Adie said, "but that's a project for a different year.  It could take
months to find out, *IF* it is possible at this late date, and we have more urgent
problems."
     "The alligators," Fandil said, nodding.  "Is there any pattern to this version
of the plague?  Does it hit only people who are already functional shapechangers?
People of a given clan, age, gender...?"
     "The closer they are to an arena, the greater the risk," Kennelworth said.  "But
everything's worse near the arena, and worst of all on or right after fight days.
Hatred expressed between Aruaki and non-Aruaki.  Casual violence, and not just by,
well, thugs and the like.  Last week I saw a woman, a genuine lady--I won't tell you
her name--kick a man in, ah, the lower body because he didn't get out of her way fast
enough.  I've seen children pushed under carriage wheels to get them out of someone's
way.  Nobody CARES about anything except themselves these days.  If this is
Khaldren's doing, then the sooner we take him down, all the way down, the better.
Anything it takes to defeat him, I say we do it.  Whatever the cost.  Or there won't
be anything left here worth having."
     Adie stood, eyes blazing and jaw set.  "We have to go after Khaldren.  Now."
     "We're not ready, Adie," Fandil protested.
     "If we follow Cho's advice and WAIT--" she spat the last word, "we'll waste our
energies fighting the damned alligators and have no strength LEFT when it comes time
to tackle Khaldren.  If he ever decides it is time."
     "Cho is honest," Fandil said, "and I know he's being straight with us in his
advice.  It really would be a bad idea to ignore--"
     "I'm tired of going around in circles, poking at the edges of the problem with a
long stick.  I'm starting now, and I'm going to move fast and act with all my
strength, whether you will help me or not.  This has got to stop!"
     "I think you're making a mistake," Fandil said, "or at least taking bigger risks
than you realize.  But if you're determined to do it, I'll help you any way I can."
     "Good."  She took a deep breath and sat down again.  "I'm not going to take of
without a thought, you know.  I realize we need a plan of some kind.  BUT!  We don't
need an elaborate, every I crossed and every T dotted plan.  I say we start at the
arena here.  Find, again, that device or talisman that collects the blood-power and
stores it and transmits it to Khaldren.  Destroy it--cut its connections, drain it of
power, and destroy it, as a first step.  Yes?"  She looked at Fandil and Kennelworth.
     Fandil exhaled noisily, stared at the ceiling for a moment, then looked back
down.  "Okay."
     "Better to do it now, before the fights, then," Kennelworth said.

Below Point or Krael:

     This new tunnel had none of the polish of the ones they'd started with.  It was
naked rock with exposed tool marks (though nothing crude), and it seemed to
Gissanniah that it was, in some way she couldn't define, more "dwarven."  Okay, she
could define the low ceiling, but other than that...she could almost see the dwarves
working here.  In fact, she could see them, shadowy ghosts moving about their ancient
business.  How odd.  Could they be ghosts?  And if they were ghosts of the builders,
why should they be HERE?  She wished Kegrald, the Khalhums Dwarf of Iaye who had
first told them about the tunnels, was here.  Kegrald had said his grandfather (some
ancestor, she couldn't remember now if it was his father or his great-grandfather or
some other) had told about the building of these tunnels.  Which must mean he hadn't
died here.  But maybe some of the others had?  It was not unknown for powerful men to
kill the people who had prepared secret places, in order to keep the secrets.  If
some of the dwarves had been killed to keep the secret of these tunnels--and others
had escaped in time to take it out into the world--then that must prove the tunnels
were important?  At least, that they had been important once.
     She bumped into Old Doc Circ and stopped, blushing a little.  At least no one
would be able to see her blushes in this murky underground place!  "What?"
     "First power node," the alchemist said, steadying her with one hand and
gesturing upward with the other.
     A sigil had been carved into the arched ceiling of the passage.
     "Oh...good.  That means we're on the right track, then?  Do we destroy it now,
or what?"
     "Or what, I believe," Senator Sedalia said.  "How does this sound as a plan:  We
will penetrate to the heart of this place, marking the nodes as we pass them.  Devise
the destruction to work by a remote signal after we're out again--"
     "GOOD idea!"
     "But in any case, move quickly," the senator finished.
     "Right."  Circ removed his backpack and began to take out small bottles, half of
them round, the other half cubical.  He passed the round ones to Gissanniah, the
square ones to Sedalia.  "These potions are inert by themselves," he said.  "Poured
together, one bottle of each, onto a double handful of lamb's wool," which he also
pulled from his pack, "they turn it into a clay-like mass that can be molded and
stuck to walls or ceilings.  Ten minutes after mixing, the result becomes rather
drastically explosive and should be enough to muck up any magical sigils they're
stuck to."
     Sedalia looked at one of the square bottles dubiously.  "I'm not sure I like the
sound of this procedure."
     "You'd be strange if you did," Cho answered.  "But it'll work, and everything
else I can think of would take longer to set up."  He unrolled the map and held it
against the wall so they could all see it.  "We're here."  He pointed to a node at
the edge of the pattern of tunnels.  "This node over here is the central one.
Blowing it is necessary but not sufficient to destroy Krael again.  For sufficiency,
for certainty, we need to take out at least three other nodes as well."  He traced a
route with his finger.  "We'll go in this way and come back out by the same path.  I
know that isn't the wisest thing, but some the tunnels may be impassable.  The ones
we've already been through, we know will be open."
     "We aren't going to argue," Sedalia said.  "Let's do it and get out."

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Ardivent,

Oh yeah!  Still here!  How sweet it is!  That makes me a three time Duelmistress with
one TV (ok, so it was ages ago) to boot.  Now I'm outta he...hey, wait a minute.  No
invite?  Hey Adie, check your records, what's the deal!?  Jeez, some people.  I'll
have to get back to ya'll on this one, but for now it looks like I need to defend
this comfy beanbag I've installed for the 'throne'.  <looks at the newsletter>  Say
what?  Earl?  Aw crap, maybe I'll sit this one out.  I'm not stupid...or, maybe I am,
we'll see.

Good luck (to me especially),
Jhezra

                                      SPY REPORT

     Good day, in ARDIVENT a quiet thief gets rich, but a quiet spymaster gets poor.  
So bring me ale and harken to my tidbits of news.  And let's see, TATER TOT fought 
CADDO SCOT and gained 16 points and contributed to WILD OATS' 2-2-0.  LOTHAR 
LIGHTSWORD has lost to LIBERTINE, falling 12 points, while helping make TUFT-TASTIC! 
a 2-3-0 turn.  Defending hers title for another turn, JHEZRA STEELBLADE kept FANDILS' 
warrior, DAVY PRIVETTE, from claiming the throne.  Can someone confirm a rumor for 
me?  I hear the top team makes their losing fighters do dishes at The Seaside Manor 
until they win.  Maybe?   
     The crowd's roar, the smell of iron and leather, mixed with sweat, what more 
could a warrior ask of life?  Well, besides that.  I also notice that the INFERNAL 
LORDS stable was the most avoided team this turn.  Come on ARDIVENT, what are you 
afraid of?  And avoiding INFERNAL LORDS more than any other team we find FANDILS.  
ARDIVENT, are we going to accept, or respect this sort of thing?  Well, sports fans, 
take notice that LIBERTINE from WILD OATS was ARDIVENT's most challenged warrior this 
turn.  In a brave attempt, ANNETTE TEVERLY from TUFT-TASTIC! challenged up 19 points 
to fight EARL from the FANDILS stable.  ANNETTE TEVERLY perhaps got hers just 
desserts, seeing as she lost to EARL and ended up with 69 recognition points.   
     The Dark Arena is for those who cannot win, not who cannot lose with grace.  
Dignity in life or death is the warrior's creed.  Kudos go out to CROSSEYED MARY this 
turn, for revenging SONS OF TULL's bloodfeud against WILD OATS' warrior SMASH HIT.  
Well done.  We'd like to remind certain teams not to rob the graves of their enemies. 
You know who you are; and it's considered rude.   
     Thought for the day, a new sword shines bright, but the notched sword sings the 
sweetest.  It's been nice chatting with you, until we meet again, keep your swords 
sharp and your hammers heavy.  Until the sun next rises and my pen sets to paper-- 
Alarond the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JHEZRA STEELBLADE 3017       15  11  0   119       TUFT-TASTIC! (265)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 EARL 3951                    13   5  0    99       FANDILS (75)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JUANITA 3926                 16   8  0    90       FANDILS (75)
 DAVY PRIVETTE 3447           21  12  0    85       FANDILS (75)
-TEMPTATION 3314               9   6  0    83       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 HAIRY BEAR 3939               6   2  0    72       THE BEARS II (355)
 TUVOLD 3946                   9   1  0    70       TUFT-TASTIC! (265)
 ANNETTE TEVERLY 3651          9   5  1    69       TUFT-TASTIC! (265)
 LIBERTINE 2597                7   7  0    69       WILD OATS (248)
 DEBRA CONKLIN 3890            9  30  0    67       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-BROQUS 3947                   8   4  1    62       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 LOTHAR LIGHTSWORD 3650        7   8  0    59       TUFT-TASTIC! (265)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-EUROQ 3901                    8   7  0    53       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 TERRENCE WYCLIFF 3433         8   5  0    51       TUFT-TASTIC! (265)
 JACINTHE 3892                 7  30  0    51       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
-BONE MILL 3977                6   3  0    48       WOE TO WHITECHAPEL (358)
 BERNICE 3996                  4   1  0    48       FANDILS (75)
 TATER TOT 3995                3   1  0    46       WILD OATS (248)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-IRONWOLF 274                  5   1  0    42       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CROSSEYED MARY 3999           3   2  0    33       SONS OF TULL (360)
 BANNIR PARK 3981              8   3  0    31       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
 CADDO SCOT 3975               9   3  0    30       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
-REAPER 3991                   2   0  0    30       BLACK COLOSSUS (359)
 SHANDRA 2259                  4   4  1    29       RIVER WARDENS (184)
 DECKER COBB 3992              3   2  0    29       BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74)
 BUNKER 4005                   2   1  0    24       SONS OF TULL (360)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MEMNOCK 3982                  3   4  1    22       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 SMASH HIT 4002                3   1  1    20       WILD OATS (248)
-UG 271                        4   2  1    19       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
-KROKUS 272                    4   2  0    19       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
 NIVIX 3986                    3   3  0    19       INFERNAL LORDS (8)
 GODZILLA 3969                 1   1  1    19       THE BEARS II (355)
-UP FROM THE SEA 3979          3   5  0    18       WOE TO WHITECHAPEL (358)
-TARAMON 270                   3   3  0    18       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
-FEAR VECTOR 3978              3   5  0    18       WOE TO WHITECHAPEL (358)
 AZURE 2335                    3   3  0    18       RIVER WARDENS (184)
 DOANE 3997                    3   2  0    16       SONS OF TULL (360)
 MIKE MILLER 4006              1   1  0    16       FANDILS (75)
-WEASEL 273                    4   2  0    15       BARBARIAN HORDE (47)
 CRISCO 2498                   1   0  0    13       RIVER WARDENS (184)
-MELON 4007                    1   0  0    12       WOE TO WHITECHAPEL (358)
-BORN OF THE DARK 4004         1   1  0     8       WOE TO WHITECHAPEL (358)
 ANDERSON 3998                 1   4  0     7       SONS OF TULL (360)
 BARRE 4001                    1   4  0     7       SONS OF TULL (360)
 MOMMA BEAR 3983               1   2  0     5       THE BEARS II (355)
 VAL 3815                      0   1  0     5       RIVER WARDENS (184)
-JESENTA 2492                  0   3  0     3       RIVER WARDENS (184)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
WOOLY 3993             0  1 0 THE BEARS II 355      MOUNTAIN TROLL 18     502 NONE    
CORNICK 4000           1  1 0 SONS OF TULL 360      SMASH HIT 4002        499 JUST REV
MORE JUNK 4009         0  1 0 WILD OATS 248         SPYMASTER 22          502 NONE    
WISP IN DARKNESS 3984  1  4 0 WOE TO WHITECHAPE 358 MEMNOCK 3982          498 REVENGED

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Congratulations to Jhezra Steelblade, Duelmistress Of The red Sands. You did, indeed,
knock Davy around. Salute.
     Fandil The Wise

Jhezra, I DO want you!
     Earl

Special Turn 500! Tuftastics on TOP! What's new? Congrats, Lady Adie.
     WOF

Well, now, Lady Adie, surely you know that the few growing-amount of grey hairs are
not as "cute" as the natural color? (wink)
     WOF

Cadmus, Juanita is not at all tired of Libertine's advances. The easy wins are
ingratiating.
     Fandil The Wise

Libertine, you Stud! Where are you .........?
     Juanita (looking everywhere)

Cadmus, not only do you match up often with Jorja, but you match up often with my
Consortium compadres -- in 46 (me), 60 (The Creepster), 78 (Houdini), and 82 (many,
many). You should get out of 100 and 102 and come to slow 106 where all the action
is.
     Fandil The Wise

Cadmus -- tufts -- lawns? Turf -- hair? There are a lot of things that the two of us
"pull" on each other.
     WOF

Jhezra, I bow to your superiority.
     Davy Privette

Lothar Lightsword, your tuft is a little thin but a tuft is a tuft is a tuft! (wink)
     Earl

Decker Cobb, whammo! I lose. You win. Salute.
     Mike Miller

Health. Humility. Honor. Life in the Arena Of The Red Sands can be precarious, but it
is home!
     Fandil The Wise

Smash Hit -- Ok, this whole bloodfeud thing isn't going my way (much to your delight,
I've no doubt!). Cornick's widow asked that we keep trying, so here we go again... --
Gerald Bostock (manager, Sons of Tull)

Fear Vector -- Well fought! How you withstood the initial fury of my attack is a
testament to your worth in the arena. -- Bunker

Born of the Dark -- Let me tell you the tales of your life, of your love and the cut
of the knife. The tireless oppression, the wisdom instilled, the desire to kill or be
killed. -- Anderson

Born of the Dark -- In other words, we fought one devil of a fight. You withstood my
unrelenting barrage for five rounds and I ran out of steam. Once I was punched out,
you came in and sntached victory. Well played, my friend! -- Anderson

Tater Tot -- Sadly dwarfed by her weapon? Bloody hell! Two criticals was more than
enough to finish off the likes of me. -- Crosseyed Mary

I'm telling you, the Trustworthy Scribe is a duelmaster in hiding. He lacked the
deftness to use two daggers at the same time, yet his first blow (to the forehead no
less!) nearly did me in. Keep your eyes peeled for this charlatan. -- Doane

Bannir Park -- Thanks for the advice. I must have grabbed the wrong one on the way to
the arena. -- Barre

Davy Privette -- Thank you for giving me another stab at you.  Get it, stab?  Heh
heh... -- Jhezra
ps. Weren't you like 12-1 at one point?

Ardivent -- It has been a while, but I was quite accustomed to receiving and taking
in good stride poor turns such as last turn's 1-4.  But I have to say, this one is
difficult to take.  I expect my warriors to beat the stand-ins, and they lost to TWO
of them.  Looks like it's back to the training room for my 'gladiators'. -- Adie
ps. At least we gained a Fandil tuft to offset the one they earned.  ;)

Earl -- Hmmph! -- Lothar

I've never seen an assassin, noble or otherwise, take such a beating and not drop
dead, let alone turn such a fight around.  He sure earned his pay this time. --
Tuvold (little apprentice boy at the magic shop)

Khalhums Dwarf -- Same as Tuvold said.  Not that I'm much better of a gladiator
considering the original crafts I was trained in... magic. -- Annette (going back to
her shop for the night)

Debra Conklin -- Well fought, if you can say that's what that was... a fight. --
Terrence

Fandil -- Aruak had turn 500 a while ago, imagine how old I feel.  I remember when
Deke of Wolfriders/Howling Den proposed the round-robin spot for turn 300! -- Adie
ps. Soultaker?  Speaking of which, he made a cameo in Aruak I hear last turn.
Amazing.
pps. Falconier?  Who's that.
ppps. Technogeek?  I wish.  The book was big, maybe it was just Annette behind it.

DeGotti -- We'll be here when you get back, good luck.  Return soon. -- Adie

Cadmus -- LOL!  Lawn grass, that's a new one.  I like it.  But I can explain.  I have
this habit of twirling my hair around my fingers, hence the name of my first team,
tuft tuggers.  As for Fandil and I, we have a kind of 'tradition' of collecting locks
of hair from those gladiators ours defeat.  I keep more a vague mental count, but
sometimes the arena looks like a barber shop.  Consortium warriors get too excited
sometimes about the idea... -- Adie

Jacinthe -- Sorry, I don't normally do that.  You know, the tuft thing... -- Tuvold

Adie -- Of course I like to be social, but not at hairstylist shops. I prefer to be
social in a more party type atmosphere! -- DeGotti

WoF -- I am glad you enjoyed the 500th turn celebration. Yes just about everyone who
ever ran a team here in Ardivent was here. It was a grand event to say the least. --
DeGotti

Adie -- Any time you hold the throne it's a great thing. And when you hold it on such
a monumentous turn it makes it even more special! -- DeGotti

Juanita -- It's been fun but, ifyou've nothing more to teach, I'm gone. -- Libertine

Decker Cobb -- Pocket Venus, eh?  I like it.  I think I like pocket fantasy better.
Work on that for a few weeks and maybe I'll stop by to see if you're ready. -- Tater
Tot

Crosseyed Mary --Keying on your eyes is difficult but shifts in your weight are hard
to miss. -- Tater Tot
PS -- Down challenges, evern little ones, are taboo 'round here.

Barre -- You would do well to heed Master Jorja's advice.  Had I sprayed a shot to
your head... -- Smash Hit

Gerald Bostock -- May I call you GB?  I admire your passion and wish you well.  As
for attack locations, some of my guys will occasionally attack vitals but only wiht a
Kill Desire of one.  They've never killed anyone doing so.  That's the goal.  The
vast majority of my fighters, including my strikers, can't get it done with a KD that
low so they aim for limbs. -- Cadmus

Adie -- You are most gracious, m'lady.  Nevertheless, with respect, I must disagree.
Ya pays yer nickel, ya takes yer ride.  In my considered opinion, every manager's
approach to the game is valid.  The responsibility for settin parameters falls upon
Lee's narrow shoulders.  My goal has always been Primus.  Basic has always been a
means to that end.  Know that I enjoy good company; friendly rivalries add a lot.
Still, I imagine most players like me are long gone.  Something about the spirit of
competition, that try your best against the best stuff, being castrated.  I make a
lousy eunuch. -- Cadmus

Reaper -- Okay, I'm embarrassed.  Just don't "reap" me, okay? -- Bannir Park

Terrence Wycliff -- That is, like, totally a weird name for a gladiator.  I mean,
Terrence?  It just doesn't have the right FEEL to it, you know?  How can you get your
mind straight for the fight, when people are all the time calling you Terrence?  It's
almost as bad as, well, Perceval, or Marmaduke, or Artie! -- Debra Conklin
P.S.  Besides, I needed the win.

Bone Mill -- I've heard ground bone has been used in making face powder.  Kind of
scary now that so many things can be carried by so many other things.  Blood, spit,
or even, who knows, bone powder!  It's enough to make people stop painting their
faces. -- Jacinthe
P.S.  Not that painting your face with white lead, or red lead, or antimony powder,
or any of those things was actually SMART, of course.

Up from the Sea -- Actually, I never go DOWN to the sea in the first place.  I'm
subject to Mal de Mer.  And don't you LAUGH about that, either.  It's a prefectly
respectable problem, just darned inconvenient. -- Caddo Scot
P.S.  Though not as inconvenient as if we lived on an island.

Mike Miller -- Funny, you don't LOOK like an elf.  But then, neither do I.  Sometimes
I wonder how the Commission figures these things out. -- Decker Cobb

Dead Duck -- Alas, we feared for your life when we saw what your manager chose to
call you, and now we see that it was a well-founded fear.  Rest in pieces, Dead Duck.
-- Bannir Park and the Bluvalley Warriors

Wise Old Fandil -- If that's what it takes to get him to leave, we'll cheer at the
stage station. -- the Bluvalley Warriors

Barre -- So long as it's our lot in LIFE, okay, no problem.  Just don't want it to be
our lot in death, you know? -- Bannir Park

Tater Tot -- Er, yeah. -- Decker Cobb
P.S.  With catsup?

Cadmus -- Six:  12, 22, 46, 60, 78, and 100. -- Jorja
P.S.  A shoe woven of thin leather strips.

Doane -- You need to work on your handwriting. -- Findiellisthin, Trustworthy Scribe

Bernice -- That was unkindly done, but with great skill.  I salute you. -- Harbad
Kore, Ambitious Guard

Annette Teverly -- My dear lady, perhaps you are not cut out for this work? --
Korbold Stonebender, Khalhums Dwarf

Tuvold -- Do not believe the things you hear about me.  I am not an "assassin," a
crude human concept.  I prefer to be considered in the light of a "population
adjustor" and an "inheritance facilitator." -- Ternas d'Aleen, Noble "Assassin"

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

MORE JUNK was dealt death by SPYMASTER in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
WOOLY was dispatched by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a action packed 1 minute Dark Arena battle.
CROSSEYED MARY subdued SMASH HIT in a action packed 1 minute Bloodfeud fight.
ANNETTE TEVERLY was devastated by EARL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge contest.
LIBERTINE defeated LOTHAR LIGHTSWORD in a 1 minute Challenge match.
BERNICE was bested by DEBRA CONKLIN in a popular 1 minute uneven Challenge brawl.
TATER TOT devastated CADDO SCOT in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
JHEZRA STEELBLADE overcame DAVY PRIVETTE in a 1 minute expert's Title fight.
JUANITA won victory over VETERAN MERCENARY in a action packed 1 minute gruesome duel.
TUVOLD overpowered JACINTHE in a 1 minute uneven duel.
HAIRY BEAR savagely defeated TERRENCE WYCLIFF in a exciting 2 minute gruesome fight.
BUNKER was beaten by BANNIR PARK in a 2 minute novice vs. veteran fight.
AZURE overcame GODZILLA in a 2 minute contest.
SHANDRA was demolished by DECKER COBB in a 1 minute mismatched match.
MEMNOCK overpowered MOMMA BEAR in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
NIVIX overpowered BARRE in a crowd pleasing 1 minute one-sided duel.
MIKE MILLER vanquished POLITE BEGGAR in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
DOANE devastated VAL in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
ANDERSON was luckily beaten by CRISCO in a 4 minute brutal bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                   9         TOTAL PARRY       23 -  10 -  1      70  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  5         BASHING ATTACK    15 -   9 -  2      63  |
|TOTAL PARRY                      4         AIMED BLOW        16 -  10 -  0      62  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  4         LUNGING ATTACK    24 -  19 -  1      56  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    4         STRIKING ATTACK   21 -  18 -  1      54  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   3         SLASHING ATTACK   12 -  15 -  1      44  |
|AIMED BLOW                       2         WALL OF STEEL     16 -  22 -  0      42  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         PARRY-RIPOSTE      6 -  18 -  0      25  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         PARRY-LUNGE        1 -   5 -  0      17  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     1         PARRY-STRIKE       0 -   1 -  0       0  |

Turn 502 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         2 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  3         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  0     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  3         2  BASHING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     2 -  1     PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  1         1  AIMED BLOW     
STRIKING ATTACK    3 -  2     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  1         1  STRIKING ATTACK
LUNGING ATTACK     5 -  4                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY        2 -  2                                       1  WALL OF STEEL  
                                                                1  PARRY-RIPOSTE  

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       JHEZRA STEELBLADE 3017     15  11  0  119 TUFT-TASTIC! (265)
STRIKING ATTACK  EARL 3951                  13   5  0   99 FANDILS (75)
SLASHING ATTACK  JUANITA 3926               16   8  0   90 FANDILS (75)
WALL OF STEEL    DAVY PRIVETTE 3447         21  12  0   85 FANDILS (75)
LUNGING ATTACK   HAIRY BEAR 3939             6   2  0   72 THE BEARS II (355)
BASHING ATTACK   TUVOLD 3946                 9   1  0   70 TUFT-TASTIC! (265)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is JUANITA 3926.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was HAIRY BEAR 3939.  The ten other most popular fighters were BUNKER 4005, GODZILLA 
3969, ANDERSON 3998, JUANITA 3926, NIVIX 3986, WOOLY 3993, CROSSEYED MARY 3999, 
BERNICE 3996, TATER TOT 3995, and JHEZRA STEELBLADE 3017.

The least popular fighter this week was CRISCO 2498.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were VAL 3815, BARRE 4001, MOMMA BEAR 3983, SHANDRA 2259, JACINTHE 3892, 
DAVY PRIVETTE 3447, CADDO SCOT 3975, ANNETTE TEVERLY 3651, TERRENCE WYCLIFF 3433, and 
DEBRA CONKLIN 3890.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

JHEZRA STEELBLADE (46-3017) TUFT-TASTIC! (265)