DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER Date : 06/11/2012 Duedate: 06/23/2012 ARDIVENT ARENA DM-46 TURN-633 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS THE COOK MESSED UP BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) (46-3919) [9-2-0,111] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader THE COOK MESSED UP ANTI-LEAP YEAR BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) THE 27 CLUB (374) (46-3919) [9-2-0,111] (46-4255) [3-2-0,30] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite MARCI FOOTE UNCLE JUNIOR BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) FANDILS (75) (46-4202) [22-26-1,107] (46-4300) [2-6-0,26] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM THE 27 CLUB (374) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. THE 27 CLUB (374) 27 2. BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) 19BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) 3. SUPERHEROS (379) 19 Unchartered Team 4. BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) 13 5. AZURE CLOUDS (183) 7 SUPERHEROS (379) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1/ 1 BASH BROS. WAITRES (351) 17 5 0 77.3 1/ 5*THE 27 CLUB (374) 8 5 0 2- 3 ERRATA (357) 45 27 0 62.5 2/ 2 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) 8 7 0 3/ 4 FANDILS (75) %1199 819 41 59.4 3/ 1 AZURE CLOUDS (183) 6 3 0 4- 5 24 HOURS OF DOOM (298) 19 14 1 57.6 4/ 3 BASH BROS. WAITRES (351) 5 1 0 5- 6*EXOTIC BLADES (373) 4 3 1 57.1 5- 4 ERRATA (357) 5 1 0 6/ 7 AZURE CLOUDS (183) 77 64 3 54.6 6- 7*EXOTIC BLADES (373) 4 3 1 7/ 8*SUPERHEROS (379) 8 7 0 53.3 7/ 8 FANDILS (75) 3 7 0 8/ 9*THE 27 CLUB (374) 11 11 0 50.0 8/10*SUPERHEROS (379) 2 3 0 9/10 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) 679 %1039 20 39.5 9- 6 24 HOURS OF DOOM (298) 1 4 0 '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank TEAM SPOTLIGHT NOT MUCH TIME IS LEFT to ENTER THE TURF WAR COMPETITION and TEAMS ARE NEEDED The Turf War is coming. The Turf War is coming. TW8 will begin in DM47 the first turn following the Philadelphia Face. Mark July 27 on your calendar. There is only one turn left between now and The Wars -- the one on July 3. Sign up. Find a team. Choose a captain. Get confirmed. And send in your two rollup certs. You can do it all in the July 3 newsletter. DO NOT MISS OUT ON THIS COMPETITION AND THE PRIZES! The status of the current entries (as of June 5) is as follows: M*MBO (Master Darque) Dec Conf CertsIn Ottodrome (Otto X) y y y Bubba's TW Army (Bubbagnoosh) y y y Darque Forces (Master Darque) y y y Fast Food (Madwand) y y y OZ FEAST LE BANANA (Mannequin) Dec Conf Certs In Second Bananas (Mannequin) y y y Mystic Orc Feast (Slugbait) y y y Land of Oz (Oz) y y y Les Turfistes (Le Pentarque) y y y CLUB FED (Vae Victus) Dec Conf CertsIn In Qeternum (Vae Victus) y y y Obsidian Order (Skaven) y y y Devil's Rejects (Lucifer) N N y Real Men Wear Pink (Glitter Boy) y y N LBA (Assur) Dec Conf CertsIn Bash Bros Park (Assur) y y y Shewish Buffet (OAB) y y y Horny Goat -X (Grimm) N N N Perhaps you have not seen the rules for TW8, which has been posted in all newsletters? Here they are. *TURF WAR 8 RULES* Starting July 30 2012 (12 turns) Bring acclaim and glory to the North Fork (DM47) arena. Anyone may participate; known alliances, new alliances, or temporary alliances created solely to compete in the Turf War! To participate, each alliance must: 1. Announce the Captain of the alliance in the North Fork (DM 47) newsletter. 2. Indicate in the newsletter which Captain/alliance you will join. 3. Announcements made on the D2 Forums or elsewhere will not be accepted. Captains are responsible for: 1. Verifying/authorizing, in the North Fork newsletter those who wish to participate under the banner of their alliance. The confirmation/verification must occur after, or in the same newsletter, but not before, the participants declaration. (Lack of participant indication of joining and/or subsequent lack of Captain confirmation will delay a team's participation in the Turf War.) 2. Distribution of prizes should their alliance win the Turf War. 3. Submit two (2) RSI Roll-Up Certificates to participate. (Note: Captains may, if they wish, submit certs for all potential members of their alliance.) Participating managers who are not Captains must: 1. Submit two (2) RSI Roll-Up Certificates to participate (Unless already submitted by Captain. Note: extras will not be returned, but will go into the winning pool of prizes.) 2. Announce their intent to compete with manager name, team name, and alliance they will represent in the North Fork (DM 47) newsletter. Announcement made on the D2 Forums will not be accepted. a. No scores will be tabulated until an RSI Gift Certificate is received, and participant indication and captain confirmation are posted in the North Fork newsletter. NO EXCEPTIONS. b. Before a manager can compete, he/she must declare themselves in the North Fork (DM 47) newsletter as stated above AND be verified in the same or subsequent newsletter by the alliance Captain they will represent. c. Only one (1) team per player may compete. No arena multiple teams or aliases will be allowed. Violations will result in immediate manager disqualification (including team point adjustments) from the Turf War (so be sure to take any multiple teams OFF of Team Maintenance and be certain not to run any other team warriors). d. Scoring will NOT be retroactive for teams/alliances that do not properly declare or get captain confirmation or fail to send a Gift Certificate by Turn 1. In other words, if your Gift Certificate is not received until Turn 3 of the Turf War, and you have fought on Turns 1 and 2, your score will not begin until Turn 3. All conditions must be met before scoring will begin--declaration, verification, and Gift Certificate received. e. No declarations or verifications will be accepted after Turn 3 of the Turf War. f. For purposes of scoring, the moderators will score the Turf War and settle any and all disputes as they arise. Their decisions will be final. (Note: the intent is to have a very thorough set of rules so that few decisions, if any, are required from the moderators.) Scoring will be as follows for Fights: Win Loss Kill Die Challenge (up or within same class) +2 -2 +5 -5 Down Challenge "Challenger" -2 -2 -5 -5 Down Challenge "Challenged" +2 0 +5 -5 Match Up +1 -1 +1 -5 Bloodfeud Challenge (Up or Down) +2 -5 +5 -10 Champion ** x2 x2 x2 x2 Dark Arena* +10 -5 xx xx Tournament Death*** -3 Halfway (6 round total) best alliance win/loss percentage **** Final (12 round total) alliance w/l% percentage **** * After 2nd win in DA, warrior scores no additional points for wins. ** Champions double applies to his score only - not to opponent. *** No warrior may be substituted without the proper use of the DA or arena death or death in a tournament or graduation. There must be a maximum of five only on a team at any point and time. (The penalty for such substitution is -10 points.) Points awarded for team tournament participation are 1 for 1 entrant, 3 for 2 entrants, 6 for 3 entrants, 10 for 4 entrants, and 15 for 5 entrants. A TV scores 7 points or a TC scores 15 points. Death in a tournament results in a -3 score. ***** Halfway points scored are 25, 20, 15, 10, 5, 5, 5 (etc) for 1st, 2nd, 3rd (etc). (To qualify for any of these points the alliance must have fought 75% of its possible fights.) Final 12 Round points scored are 40, 30, 20, 15, 10, 5, 5, 5 (etc) for the 1st, 2nd, 3rd (etc). (To qualify for any of these points the alliance must have fought 75% of its possible fights.) Special Scoring Considerations for the Turf War are as follows: Full Team: +1 1. A team which fights 4+ warriors (Includes DAing) gets a point Full Alliance +1 2. An alliance were ALL teams get a Full Team point earns a point Full Team/Alliance scores 3. Will double for the last half (6 rounds) of TW8. Style Master: +2 1. No matter how many stylemasters, an individual team can score only +2 per round. Duelmaster: +2 1. Duelmaster points shall be earned separate of stylemaster points. Champions: 1. A Champion may be declared, but one is not mandatory. 2. Only one Champion allowed per manager at any given time. 3. Champions that graduate or are killed by another warrior in the arena, but not the Dark Arena, may be replaced. 4. Champions must have fought at least one previous fight in the North Fork (DM47 arena) to be able to be declared a champion. 5. A Champion can be declared on any round and point factors will begin that same turn. (Must meet above 4 conditions prior to declaring.) Bloodfeuds: 1. Bloodfeuds will score points on all four (4) turns. 2. There is no limit to which warrior may bloodfeud or how often. 3. To score as a bloodfeud, then feud/death must have occurred totally within the TW8. (E.g. Feuds created prior to TW8 will not be deemed or scored as a bloodfeud, but rather as a challenge or downchallenge. Downchallenges: 1. A downchallenge occurs when a warrior challenges a warrior in a lower class. (Lower class is defined as lower than the identical class. E.g. A challenger champion class challenging a champion class is a down challenge.) 2. In TW8 a standard challenge is up (in recognition points), parallel or within the identical class but lower recognition. 3. No challenge by The Duelmaster shall be deemed a downchallenge. (This rule supersedes all other downchallenge rules.) Tournament Considerations: 1. Tournament participation is allowed and ENCOURAGED as a great form of recognition for North Fork. 2. Tournament Victors (live only) won during the course of the contest will gain a one (1) time bonus of 7 points. This bonus will apply EACH time a warrior(s) wins such status. 3. Tournament Champions (live only) won during the course of the contest will gain a one (1) time bonus of 15 points. This bonus will apply EACH time a warrior(s) win such status. 4. Points awarded for tournament participation are are 1 for 1 entrant, 3 for 2 entrants, 6 for 3 entrants, 10 for 4 entrants, and 15 for 5 entrants. A TV scores 7 points additional or a TC scores 15 points additional. Death in a tournament results in an additional -3 score. 5. Points for entrants, TVs, TCs, and tournament deaths will be applied the Turn after RSI posts tournament results in the North Fork (DM 47) newsletter (i.e., if the results post on North Fork turn 300, points will be credited on North Fork turn 301 to the applicable teams). Special Considerations: 1. Each alliance begins the Turf War with zero (0) points. 2. There will be NO alliance or team changes once the contest has begun. If you begin the Turf War with Alliance A, you must end the Turf War with Alliance A. If you begin the Turf War with Team A, you must end the Turf War with Team A. 3. There will be a maximum of four (4) teams/managers allowed per alliance for the Turf War VII. The minimum is two (2). 4. The Dark Arena may be used on the first FE turn (e.g. no arena or tournament fights) only, of every warrior, without penalty. 5. If at any time, the Moderators determine that any non-TW team in the arena is aiding and/or abetting any TW alliance or team, the affected points won by the gifted team/alliance will be disallowed and the aiding non-TW team will be asked to desist from play in the arena until after the Turf War concludes. Prizes: The Turf War is meant to be a "winner takes all" contest. However, for TW8, a prize (RU cert) will be awarded each of the twelve turns to the individual team/manager that fights five fights and has the best w/l record that turn. (Tiebreakers are in this order -- kills, recognition points earned.) All prizes and 100% of the Gift Certificates will be awarded to the Captain of the winning alliance at the end of the competition. It is the responsibility of the Captain to distribute Gift Certificates. Moderators will submit a list of each manager on the winning alliance to RSI at the completion of the contest for the non-Certificate prizes. All entry fees (rollup certs) are awarded to the winning alliance, except for the twelve reserved for the individual winning manager each week.) The following prizes have been secured from RSI: 1. Renaming of the North Fork (DM 47) arena; 2. Renaming of all Dark Arena Monsters (two for each manager in the winning alliance, and two additional for the captain of the alliance). 3. Known Favorites for one DM47 warrior on each team of the winning alliance (warrior must be ranked Initiate or above, must be alive, and must have at least one DM47 arena fight to receive this award). 4. +1 Skill bonus (three) for each manager on the winning alliance. Bonus potions must be applied to living warriors from DM 47, no more than two skills per warrior. 5. +1 Skill bonus potion (one) for each and every individual manager who fights in all 12 rounds AND 54 fights of the Turf War. Bonus potion must be applied to a living warrior from (DM 47) 6. Two additional rollup certs for each manager of the winning alliance from RSI. These RSI awards will be listed by the Moderator for claiming from RSI (Lee) within 4 turns of the end of TW VI. The certs will be mailed to the winning alliance by the Moderators within two weeks of the end of the TW. Moderators: The Moderators for this event will be Oz and Master Darque. They will arbitrate all dealings during the course of the contest. Their decisions will be final. All questions, comments, and scoring disputes may be directed to Land of Oz or Darque Forces via diplo in DM 47. Managers with internet access may send a private message to [The Consortium] or [Darque] on the Duel2 Forums. Lastly, you may also email questions, comments, and scoring disputes to rebelnerfherder at yahoo dot com or wfms101 at aol dot com. Please note there have been rule changes from the last Turf War. Please read them carefully! This contest will begin in late July 2012 following the Summer FTF. **TW8 Revision 06-05-12** * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * ---===ANDORIAN REGIONAL NEWS===--- Duelmasters ----------- DM 8 ARKERS (turn 349): IMA SLAYER of YOU PAY I SLAY (Khisanth, mgr.) DM 11 ARUAK CITY (turn 699): SLARTIBARTFAST of THE HITCHHIKERS (Deep Thought, mgr.) DM 14 TOBIR (turn 699): VLAD THE IMPALER of THE DEATH SQUAD (Street Legal, mgr.) DM 22 SOLVEN (turn 684): ROMO of SERPENTS HOLD (Khisant, mgr.) DM 24 ZORPUNT (turn 686): TARANA STONE of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.) DM 25 LYRATILAN (turn 683): RAGDOLL of ERRATA (JE, mgr.) DM 26 CALEAM (turn 680): SEETHER of WENSINWASIN 5.5.2. (Khorvinus, mgr.) DM 30 IAYE (turn 681): EMERICA of RESCUE RANGERS II (Rascally Rabbit, mgr.) DM 40 ZENSU (turn 644): LINAEA DEANE of BEYOND THE PALE (Jorja, mgr.) DM 41 KATI-TEI (turn 641): JACK DANIELS of I C DRUNK PEOPLE (Floyd, mgr.) DM 46 ARDIVENT (turn 632): THE COOK MESSED UP of BASH BROS. WAITRESS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.) DM 52 FRATSFA (turn 295): SAVAGE SNOWBALL of FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.) DM 63 AMEN-TEI (turn 526): KUNG PAO KOLACTAN of SHEWISH BUFFET (One Armed Bandit) DM 71 KYR'TERR (turn 250): POSITION IS EMPTY ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 584): COYOTE of BUGS, SLUGS & THUGS (A-Sop, mgr.) Top Teams --------- DM 8 ARKERS (turn 649): YOU PAY I SLAY (Khisanth, mgr.) DM 11 ARUAK CITY (turn 699): THE ASSEMBLY (Froot E. Bowl, mgr.) DM 14 TOBIR (turn 699): THE DEATH SQUAD (Street Legal, mgr.) DM 22 SOLVEN (turn 684): MIDDLE WAY 15 (Jorja, mgr.) DM 24 ZORPUNT (turn 686): KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.) DM 25 LYRATILAN (turn 683): ANDROID DUNGEON 010 (Floyd, mgr.) DM 26 CALEAM (turn 680): WRATHMEN (Kharadmon, mgr.) DM 30 IAYE (turn 681): LENPROS (Lenpro, mgr.) DM 40 ZENSU (turn 644): BEYOND THE PALE (Jorja, mgr.) DM 41 KATI-TEI (turn 641): WANDERERS (Jorja, mgr.) DM 46 ARDIVENT (turn 632): AZURE CLOUDS (slugbait, mgr.) DM 52 FRATSFA (turn 296): FLOWER GIRLS (Lady Fern, mgr.) DM 63 AMEN-TEI (turn 526): WRATHMEN (Kharadmon, mgr.) DM 71 KYR'TERR (turn 250): WRATHMEN XIV (Kharadmon, mgr.) ADM 105 ANDORAK (turn 584): SUPERIOR FORCES et al (Manager, mgr.) Recent Graduates ---------------- DM 11 ARUAK CITY (turn 698): BERLAM FOOTE of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.) DM 24 ZORPUNT (turn 686): TARANA STONE of KRILL CAVALRY (Jorja, mgr.) (turn 685): RINGWORM of WRESTLING (Sherlock, mgr.) DM 25 LYRATILAN (turn 683): WAIT of ERRATA (JE, mgr.) DM 30 IAYE (turn 681): EMERICA of RESCUE RANGERS II (Rascally Rabbit, mgr.) (turn 680): DREAM OF DAY of RANDOM (JE, mgr.) DM 40 ZENSU (turn 644): LORIS DEANE of BEYOND THE PALE (Jorja, mgr.) DM 52 FRATSFA (turn 295): AREOPOLITE of BLOOD AND GUTS! (Le Pentarque, mgr.) DM 71 KYR'TERR (turn 250): RAPUNZEL of DARQUE FORCES V (Master Darque, mgr.) (turn 249): SUGAR HILL GANG of RAP ATTACKS (Marma Duke, mgr.) DUELMASTER'S COLUMN Notes from the arena champ. Sandbagger?!? I'm hurt. I'm just a gal trying to make a living, waiting on tables, fighting on the side. I've fought in only two tourneys and Assur says I can quit my day job when I get immortality and be a full time gladiator. In the meantime, you'll see me fighting by day, waiting tables by night. Too many bills! This time, our fight was much different, but unfortunately the cook messed up Shelley's order again. I do not understand what our cook's problem is. It is surprising I get tips at all. But people are sometimes kind. Not always, but sometimes. My challenges go out to the strikers, my avoid to the slasher. -- The Cook Messed Up SPY REPORT Well, what are you looking at, ARDIVENT? Ain't you never seen Snide Clemens before? Ah, shaddup and listen to my news. Later days, AZURE CLOUDS, since THE 27 CLUB took top team from you this turn, you guys are old news. THE 27 CLUB turned their 3-1-0 turn into a 1st place rank in the listings this turn. Any better than this, and you get put on hit lists. Of course, we're all terribly impressed to see KURT COBAIN win a fight and gain 14 points, terribly. Tsk, tsk, MARCI FOOTE beat SHELLEY ANN and SHELLEY ANN lost 7 points. You're breakin' my heart. And if variety is the spice of life, ARDIVENT may be getting bland, as THE COOK MESSED UP stays top dog in the city. I'm not in a very good mood today, but why am I telling you this? You want to know what's new, don't you, ARDIVENT? Well, let's take a look at some more misdeeds of you miserable sword-boys. What's the big D? ERRATA was the most avoided team? Bunch of lily livered... grumble... mumble... curse... And who led the way in this mass act of cowardice? Let's see, well, whatcha know? It was AZURE CLOUDS. Ha ha ha ha! MARCI FOOTE was challenged more times this turn than the Duelmaster. Now was the DM insulted or feared? Heh, heh. I guess I can give a little credit to BLACK BILE of AZURE CLOUDS for challenging up by 24 to LONG BIGGAR. BLACK BILE lost to get 63 points of recognition. And we have VIOLENT ORANGE in a challenge, going down 15 points for the fight. Guess what? I thought VIOLENT ORANGE showed great skill and promise when she won victory over CORBIN ROSS. All right, so I slept through it! Big deal! Death and Taxes. The less death I see, the more it taxes my patience. Let's see if anyone's dead or dying. Titanium shields and bamboo daggers, guess what brave team is developing these kinds of weapons? I was about to buy a new quill pen the other day, but some fighter took it for an epee. Forgive me for writing with a dagger. Just wait 'till next time I show up here, I won't be so nice! So nyaaah! Paste this one in your scrapbooks, you'll need the kindling come this winter-- Snide Clemens DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME THE COOK MESSED UP 3919 9 2 0 111 BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME MARCI FOOTE 4202 22 26 1 107 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) LONG BIGGAR 4228 19 15 0 99 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) -BAXTER 3970 13 9 0 99 ERRATA (357) -RON BURGUNDY 3974 9 4 0 99 ERRATA (357) VIOLENT ORANGE 1893 13 7 2 91 AZURE CLOUDS (183) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME SHELLEY ANN 4234 9 11 1 81 FANDILS (75) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME CORBIN ROSS 4250 9 8 0 65 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) WHAT WATER? 3917 8 3 0 64 BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) BLACK BILE 1868 16 7 0 63 AZURE CLOUDS (183) -CLARA ROSE 4256 6 1 1 57 FANDILS (75) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME JOUBERT KLEE 4249 11 6 0 39 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) NO NAME 2933 8 2 0 34 AZURE CLOUDS (183) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME ARLENE ROSS 4302 6 3 0 33 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) IRVIN 4257 4 7 0 31 FANDILS (75) ANTI-LEAP YEAR 4255 3 2 0 30 THE 27 CLUB (374) KURT COBAIN 4253 2 3 0 27 THE 27 CLUB (374) UNCLE JUNIOR 4300 2 6 0 26 FANDILS (75) -AEON 4248 2 0 0 25 EXOTIC BLADES (373) -DEW 4216 2 4 0 25 ERRATA (357) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME STORM 4306 5 4 0 23 SUPERHEROS (379) JIM 4315 4 0 0 23 THE 27 CLUB (374) -SNUFFY 4263 3 7 0 23 FANDILS (75) JIMI HENDRIX 4251 2 3 0 17 THE 27 CLUB (374) NOVA 4308 2 1 0 16 SUPERHEROS (379) -ZANTAK 4322 1 0 0 16 24 HOURS OF DOOM (298) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -MAY 4317 1 1 0 15 24 HOURS OF DOOM (298) -ETERNITY 4244 1 0 0 13 EXOTIC BLADES (373) -SPIDERMAN 4303 1 0 0 12 SUPERHEROS (379) -SLAYER 4247 1 1 1 9 EXOTIC BLADES (373) -RASTUS 4318 1 1 0 9 24 HOURS OF DOOM (298) -BLUE NOTE 4301 1 3 0 6 AZURE CLOUDS (183) -FUTTERBINGER 4319 1 1 0 4 24 HOURS OF DOOM (298) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? MORRISON 4316 0 1 0 THE 27 CLUB 374 SLAYER 4247 631 REVENGED PERSONAL ADS The Cook Messed Up -- Well, you didn't mess up in our fight. You plastered me with sloppy sushi and sticky sugary stuff, and took advantage of me. Meany! -- Shelley The Cook Messed Up and Assur -- Congrats again on the DM Title in The Red Sands. -- Fandil The Wise No Name -- I couldn't hit you hard and enough because you had no name. Unfair! -- Uncle Junior Slugbait -- Aha! Moving up to mediocrity! Almost there! Well done. -- A smiling Fandil The Wise Ophers hurt! 0-3 is demoralizing! -- An old, depressed, Fandil The Wise What Water? -- I just want to say that I hate you and wish to treat you like my litter box! -- Irvin Really loving the personals, Everyone. Kudos. -- WOF Indeed. It's an art. Health. Humility. Honor. The Red Sands await. -- Fandil The Wise Irvin -- I'm a much better waitress than my teammate. Maybe not a better fighter, but definitely a better waitress. Luckily I'm a good enough fighter to get past you! -- What Water? Fandil -- 2-3. You must be slipping. Too much of that sleepy pain medicine for your back? I'll take it since it's the only way I'll get ahead. -- your pal sluggy Marci -- Sigh. I thought I had you but not mean old you. Got a little red blood over my nice new Orange armor. Now slugbait is going to have to clean up after me again. -- Violent Orange Uncle Junior -- Looks like you can say Uncle after all. -- No Name Longer -- My guess is that if we had gone a bit longer I'd have learned big skills. - my Bile is up and Black Uncle Junior -- Of course we're respectful. You're so old and decrepit and all. -- Arlene Ross Vi Orange -- More like sherbet than a highway worker's safety vest. Rather tasty, sherbet.... -- Marci Foote What Water? -- Ah... okay. Thanks. -- Joubert Klee Violent Orange -- Or how about what Jorja calls a Marmalade Cat (don't ask me why!)? Vanilla ice cream floated in orange juice, chunky orange juice for choice. -- Marci Foote P.S. Jorja says, "It's like a Purple Cow but better." I gather from her further comments that a Purple Cow involves floating the ice cream in grape juice. Weird stuff here. Black Bile -- Mashed potatoes. -- Long Biggar P.S. That's just what I happened to think of. I know it doesn't make sense. P.P.S. Jorja says on no account should you allow the Infirmarians to "bleed you to balance the humors." Doesn't sound humorous to me! Happy Peasant? Say better, Idiot Peasant. -- Corbin Ross Dew -- Foggy, foggy dew? Mountain dew? Department of Education and Welfare? Idle minds are vaguely curious. -- Joubert Klee Jimi Hendrix -- It wasn't luck, it was the incredible rush that came from realizing that if I won, we would have a five-oh turn. And we DO. That's a rush, and it doesn't happen often for us. -- Arlene Ross LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS VIOLENT ORANGE devastated CORBIN ROSS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight. SHELLEY ANN was vanquished by MARCI FOOTE in a 1 minute uneven Challenge battle. BLACK BILE was vanquished by LONG BIGGAR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl. THE COOK MESSED UP overpowered NOBLE ASSASSIN in a 1 minute mismatched Title match. JOUBERT KLEE was devastated by WHAT WATER? in a 1 minute one-sided duel. NO NAME unbelievably bested UNCLE JUNIOR in a crowd pleasing 7 minute bloody match. IRVIN was overpowered by ARLENE ROSS in a action packed 4 minute uneven melee. JIMI HENDRIX lost to NOVA in a action packed 4 minute gruesome fight. STORM outlasted TRUSTWORTHY SCRIBE in a tiresome 7 minute fight. KURT COBAIN handily defeated TRUSTWORTHY SCRIBE in a 1 minute one-sided bout. ANTI-LEAP YEAR demolished TRUSTWORTHY SCRIBE in a 1 minute mismatched match. JIM unbelievably bested FRIENDLY CONSTABLE in a tiresome 3 minute novice's contest. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |STRIKING ATTACK 5 AIMED BLOW 23 - 13 - 0 64 | |AIMED BLOW 4 WALL OF STEEL 7 - 4 - 0 64 | |SLASHING ATTACK 2 PARRY-STRIKE 7 - 5 - 0 58 | |TOTAL PARRY 2 LUNGING ATTACK 14 - 10 - 1 58 | |LUNGING ATTACK 2 TOTAL PARRY 17 - 13 - 0 57 | |PARRY-LUNGE 1 SLASHING ATTACK 9 - 8 - 0 53 | |PARRY-STRIKE 1 STRIKING ATTACK 26 - 28 - 0 48 | |BASHING ATTACK 1 BASHING ATTACK 8 - 12 - 0 40 | |WALL OF STEEL 1 PARRY-LUNGE 1 - 2 - 0 33 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 1 - 0 0 | Turn 633 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: PARRY-LUNGE 1 - 0 STRIKING ATTACK 2 - 3 4 STRIKING ATTACK PARRY-STRIKE 1 - 0 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 2 LUNGING ATTACK SLASHING ATTACK 2 - 0 LUNGING ATTACK 0 - 2 1 AIMED BLOW BASHING ATTACK 1 - 0 WALL OF STEEL 0 - 1 1 SLASHING ATTACK TOTAL PARRY 2 - 0 1 PARRY-STRIKE AIMED BLOW 3 - 1 1 BASHING ATTACK 1 WALL OF STEEL TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME AIMED BLOW THE COOK MESSED UP 3919 9 2 0 111 BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) STRIKING ATTACK LONG BIGGAR 4228 19 15 0 99 BLUVALLEY WARRIORS (74) PARRY-STRIKE VIOLENT ORANGE 1893 13 7 2 91 AZURE CLOUDS (183) BASHING ATTACK WHAT WATER? 3917 8 3 0 64 BASH BROS. WAITRESS (351) WALL OF STEEL BLACK BILE 1868 16 7 0 63 AZURE CLOUDS (183) TOTAL PARRY NO NAME 2933 8 2 0 34 AZURE CLOUDS (183) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is MARCI FOOTE 4202. The most popular warrior this turn was UNCLE JUNIOR 4300. The ten other most popular fighters were JIMI HENDRIX 4251, ARLENE ROSS 4302, NOVA 4308, MARCI FOOTE 4202, THE COOK MESSED UP 3919, VIOLENT ORANGE 1893, LONG BIGGAR 4228, WHAT WATER? 3917, KURT COBAIN 4253, and ANTI-LEAP YEAR 4255. The least popular fighter this week was JIM 4315. The other ten least popular fighters were STORM 4306, IRVIN 4257, NO NAME 2933, JOUBERT KLEE 4249, BLACK BILE 1868, CORBIN ROSS 4250, SHELLEY ANN 4234, ANTI-LEAP YEAR 4255, KURT COBAIN 4253, and WHAT WATER? 3917.