DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER

Date   : 08/12/2003    Duedate: 09/08/2003

NORTH FORK ARENA

DM-47    TURN-201

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

JUMBO MUMBO
SPOONERTIKS (523)
(47-4714) [17-1-1,138]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

JUMBO MUMBO                    POSITION IS EMPTY
SPOONERTIKS (523)              
(47-4714) [17-1-1,138]         

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

THREEKARD                      THREEKARD
CARNIVAL (411)                 CARNIVAL (411)
(47-4600) [13-8-1,102]         (47-4600) [13-8-1,102]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

COFFEE RULES! (505)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)    67
2. ROYAL FLUSH (48)            52      SPOONERTIKS (523)
3. COFFEE RULES! (505)         35      Unchartered Team
4. CARNIVAL (411)              32
5. SPOONERTIKS (523)           29      BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)   4   1  0 80.0   1/ 5 COFFEE RULES! (505)      11  4 0
 2/ 1 SPOONERTIKS (523)         59  26  3 69.4   2/ 1 SPOONERTIKS (523)        10  3 2
 3/ 4 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   199 113 16 63.8   3/ 4 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         10  5 0
 4/ 0*MY DAY (557)               3   2  0 60.0   4/ 6 DRAKE'S COMICS (463)      9  6 1
 5/ 5 LAND OF OZ (217)         360 253 11 58.7   5/ 2 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)    9  6 0
 6/ 6 DRAKE'S COMICS (463)     116  86  4 57.4   6/ 7 CARNIVAL (411)            8  7 0
 7/ 7 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         532 416 29 56.1   7/ 3 WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE (541)  8  7 0
 8/ 9 COFFEE RULES! (505)       70  55  2 56.0   8/10 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)      7  8 0
 9/10 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)     252 233 25 52.0   9/11 MEL'S DRAGOONS (553)      6  8 0
10/11 CARNIVAL (411)           127 128  7 49.8  10/ 9 SCREEN DREAMS (488)       5  8 0
11/13 WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE (541)  25  26  1 49.0  11/ 0*BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)  4  1 0
12/12 THE FEDERATION (539)      32  36  1 47.1  12/ 0*MY DAY (557)              3  2 0
13/14 MEL'S DRAGOONS (553)      61  71  2 46.2  13/ 8 THE FEDERATION (539)      3  7 0
14-15*FALLEN SHADOWS (495)       4   5  0 44.4  14/20 LAND OF OZ (217)          2  3 0
15-16 WARHAMMERS (75)          214 275 12 43.8  15-13*SLITHER (554)             2  3 0
16/17 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    73 106  2 40.8  16/16 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    2 10 0
17-19*SLITHER (554)              2   3  0 40.0  17-18*FORLORN HOPE (78)         1  0 0
18/18 SCREEN DREAMS (488)       50  76  3 39.7  18-15*DARK MATTER (550)         1  3 1

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19-21*FORLORN HOPE (78)          8  13  1 38.1  19-21 WARHAMMERS (75)           0  3 0
20-22*DARK MATTER (550)          2   7  1 22.2  20-12*FALLEN SHADOWS (495)      0  2 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

All right, here we go with the new Annual format.  It'll make comparisons to previous
records a tad awkward, but a year seems a more logical break point for a slow arena
than ten turns, plus it means I have to write these that much less often.  So, with
no further boring explanations that you don't care about, I give you:

                            THE NORTH FORK ANNUAL REVIEW
                                 (Turns 188 to 200)

Back on turn 187, we had 44 teams in the arena, and as of turn 200, we've dropped all
the way down to 22!  That's a 50% reduction.  See what your convoluted contest has
created, Crip?  Next time stick to rules people can understand!  My head still hurts
from reading that mess, and I haven't looked at them since the contest started!

                      THE TOP 5 TEAMS OF THE LAST YEAR
             Team                      W   L   K   Rec  Percent
             ----                     --  --  --   ---  -------
             SPOONERTIKS              41  21   1   332   66.12%
             MYSTIC ORC FEAST         42  23   1   259   64.61%
             COFFEE RULES!            38  26   1   206   59.37%
             CARNIVAL                 37  28   0   151   56.92%
             DRAKE'S COMICS           33  29   0   205   53.22%
             * - Only currently listed teams with at least 25 fights were considered.
                 The field consisted of  13  eligible teams.

Once again, Mystic Orc Feast appears in the top 5.  In fact, they're the only team to
have appeared in the top 5 on every single report I've done.  All I can say to that
is:  Stop it!  You're making the rest of us look bad.  Also, even though they've
dropped off the top 5 list, Royal Flush still holds the best ever win/loss percent at
66.66% set last year.

                       THE BOTTOM 5 TEAMS OF THE LAST YEAR
               Team                      W   L   K   Rec  Percent
               ----                     --  --  --   ---  -------
               THE MIDDLE WAY 3         18  44   0    71   29.03%
               WARHAMMERS               13  26   0    43   33.33%
               ARGOSSEANS               24  27   1    81   47.05%
               WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE       22  24   1   236   47.82%
               THE BEAR'S PAW           31  31   2   143   50.00%

All of three teams and 3% separate the Top 5 from the Bottom 5 this time around.  In
case I haven't said it before, I'll say it again:  We need more teams!  Time to start
a recruitment drive.  In any case, it's Jorja's Middle Way 3 at the bottom of the
heap this time around.  Just how many Middle Way's are there, anyway, and which one
is truly the center?  Right, back to the topic at hand.  Well, Jorja, you'll be glad
to know that your performance still wasn't lower than our worst ever (from 3 years
ago) of 13.79% held by Wolfe Pack (I think it was the extra 'e' that did them in).

                           THE ANNUAL ALLIANCE RECORD
                                       Kills    Rec /
         Alliance              W    L  / Team    Team  Percent  FpTpT(*)
         --------            ---  ---  ------   -----  -------  --------
         D.O.C.S.             75   55    0.33  165.33   57.69%      4.81
         MOTO                 71   55    0.50  205.50   56.34%      4.84
         DOC                  31   31    1.00  260.00   50.00%      4.76
         Independent         207  222    0.40   83.20   48.25%      4.37
         Crimson Vengeance    24   27    1.00   81.00   47.05%      6.37
         * = Fights per Team per Turn
Crimson Vengeance:  ARGOSSEANS, CON'S CREW
D.O.C.S.:  LAND OF OZ, MYSTIC ORC FEAST, ROYAL FLUSH
DOC:  SCREEN DREAMS
MOTO:  COFFEE RULES!, DRAKE'S COMICS

Okay, D.O.C.S. and MOTO are now defunct, but I left them in because I find it amusing
that two disbanded alliances out-performed any of the other alliances and did it
while managing a higher Fight Per Turn average.  Why do you folks do alliances again?
BTW, the alliance record of 60.6% (set by D.O.C.S. last year) still stands as our
best ever.

Other than D.O.C.S. and MOTO, if any of my alliance info is out of date, let me know
so I can update it.

                           THE TOP 10 WARRIOR RECORDS
              Name                    ID   W   L   K   Rec  Percent
              ----                  ----  --  --  --   ---  -------
              DEEP FRIED LARD       4975   7   0   0    43  100.00%
              JUMBO MUMBO           4714  12   1   1    98   92.30%
              TENT IN QUARANTINO    4816  12   1   0    84   92.30%
              INCREDIBLE SULK       4511  10   3   0    58   76.92%
              ZEEL BEBUB            4713   9   4   0    88   69.23%
              ONE HIT WONDER        4680   9   4   0    70   69.23%
              LATTE                 4667   9   4   0    36   69.23%
              FRANC N' STEEN        4649   9   4   0    35   69.23%
              CUP OF CAT            4926   8   4   0    79   66.66%
              ELLIE MAE             4751   6   3   0    78   66.66%
              * - Only warriors with at least 5 fights and on currently listed teams
                  were considered.
              The field consisted of  68  eligible warriors.

Finally!  We don't have a 5-fight wonder topping the list.  Deep Fried Lard's 7 fight
undefeated streak gives it the record, beating out Asphalt Aster's 5-0-1 61 from last
year.  Much better.

                          THE BOTTOM 10 WARRIOR RECORDS
              Name                    ID   W   L   K   Rec  Percent
              ----                  ----  --  --  --   ---  -------
              OLGON PUY             4968   0   7   0     7    0.00%
              RONDOL QUIGLO         4978   1   6   0     9   14.28%
              SUPPER MAN            4950   1   4   0     7   20.00%
              GABHAN                4817   1   4   0     7   20.00%
              ANGIE PURELOVE        4895   1   4   0     7   20.00%
              SULLA                 4977   1   4   0     7   20.00%
              FOLMOR GRIGG          4501   3  10   0    19   23.07%
              JEM KATOREH           4499   4   9   0    21   30.76%
              HARRA INSIL           4500   2   4   0   -17   33.33%
              TEMPUS                4635   4   8   0     9   33.33%

In a similar yet opposite feat, Olgon Puy's 7 fight winless streak sets a new record.
So, it's no longer Daisy Duke's 0-6-0 6 that I get to make fun of.  I'm sure Fizban's
breathing a sigh of relief.

                           TOP FIVE TEAM RECOGNITION
                    TEN TURN TOTAL       |       SINGLE TURN
            Team                   Rec   |  Team                  Rec
            ----                   ---   |  ----                  ---
            SPOONERTIKS            332   |  SPOONERTIKS            65
            SCREEN DREAMS          260   |  SPOONERTIKS            58
            MYSTIC ORC FEAST       259   |  DRAKE'S COMICS         58
            WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE     236   |  CARNIVAL               55
            ROYAL FLUSH            225   |  WARHAMMERS             55

Okay, Spoonertiks managed an impressive recognition gain.  However, their average of
25.5 rec per turn isn't quite enough to beat out Royal Flush's record of 27.4 per
turn.  As far as single turns go, Spoonertiks managed to top that list as well but
fell far short of the Flush's 87 point record.

                           TOP TEN WARRIOR RECOGNITION
                 TEN TURN TOTAL         |           SINGLE TURN
       Name                    ID  Rec  |  Name                    ID  Rec
       ----                  ----  ---  |  ----                  ----  ---
       JUMBO MUMBO           4714   98  |  HONEY BEAR            3032   31
       UR BRAIN ON EGG       4703   89  |  THE MIGHTY SORE       4490   30
       ZEEL BEBUB            4713   88  |  JUMBO MUMBO           4714   29
       TENT IN QUARANTINO    4816   84  |  BEAR KEEPER           3782   27
       CUP OF CAT            4926   79  |  GALLIENUS             4956   26
       ELLIE MAE             4751   78  |  THREEKARD             4600   26
       ONE HIT WONDER        4680   70  |  THE CAPTAIN           4856   25
       SEKA                  4612   66  |  FRANK HOJ             4861   24
       CJ                    4752   64  |  ESPRESSO              4556   24
       100% COLUMBIAN        4874   63  |  KING CRAB             4983   24

Jumbo Mumbo made a worthy effort, but 7.5 rec per turn isn't enough to beat the best
average of 9.7 held by Wolfgang Duck (which seems to have stood forever).  Also,
Honey Bear's 31 points in a single turn is 10 points shy of Steve McQueen's record.

                         BOTTOM TEN WARRIOR RECOGNITION
                 TEN TURN TOTAL         |           SINGLE TURN
       Name                    ID  Rec  |  Name                    ID  Rec
       ----                  ----  ---  |  ----                  ----  ---
       INSOLENT IDIOT        4387  -19  |  RING D'BELL           4300  -66
       ELIA ANINUS           4222  -18  |  VULPECULA             4648  -60
       BORUS GALARGUS        4224  -17  |  ESPRESSO              4556  -50
       HARRA INSIL           4500  -17  |  BEAR KEEPER           3782  -46
       MRS. HOWELL           4611  -12  |  ELIA ANINUS           4222  -44
       THE IMPERATOR         4585   -9  |  BORUS GALARGUS        4224  -41
       SPAM THING            4216   -8  |  SCORPION KING         4718  -39
       ELEN B'TON            4815   -8  |  INSOLENT IDIOT        4387  -35
       BULFUR                5041   -7  |  INCREDIBLE SULK       4511  -30
       ESPRESSO              4556   -6  |  SEPTIC SOCK           4563  -30

Well, Insolent Idiot's loss of 1.46 recognition per turn isn't even in the parking
lot of the same ballpark as King Uvdahell's 7.9 per turn drop record.  Also, Ring
D'Bell just barely managed to lose half as much as King U.'s -112 in a single turn
record.

                               RULERS OF THE RING
                                  Chartered            Unchartered
       Turn  Duelmaster           Recognition Leader   Recognition Leader
       ----  ----------           ------------------   ------------------
       188   CINCINATTUS          BORUS GALARGUS       TOONERSPIK
       189   WOLB DEMIA           WOLB DEMIA           JUSTICE
       190   BORUS GALARGUS       BLACK FLAG           JUSTICE
       191   ESPRESSO             ESPRESSO             JUMBO MUMBO
       192   ESPRESSO             ESPRESSO             ZEEL BEBUB
       193   ESPRESSO             ESPRESSO             POSITION IS EMPTY
       194   INCREDIBLE SULK      BEAR KEEPER          BELANNA TORRES
       195   MARY ANN             MARY ANN             BELANNA TORRES
       196   ZEEL BEBUB           ZEEL BEBUB           KENTSUI FURY
       197   RING D'BELL          RING D'BELL          POSITION IS EMPTY
       198   RING D'BELL          RING D'BELL          HUMUNGOUS
       199   JUMBO MUMBO          JUMBO MUMBO          JIAN
       200   JUMBO MUMBO          JUMBO MUMBO          ARISTON

It looks like Espresso was the longest running DM and Chartered Rec Leader this time
out.  Of course, at only 23% of the available turns, it falls short of Ten
Commandments DM record of 40% and the 30% CRL record jointly held by King Uvdahell,
Apple Jack and Ten Commandments.  Is it me, or is there a theme among the CRL record
leaders?  There's a 3-way tie on the Unchartered Recognition Leader front between
Justice, Belanna Torres and that mysterious Position Is Empty person.  Of course,
Wolb Demia's 50% of available turns as URL (performed last year) keeps him as the
record holder.

                                 THE FANS SPEAK
               Popularity           This                 This Week's
         Turn  Leader               Week's Favorite      Least Favorite
         ----  ------               ---------------      --------------
         188   INSOLENT IDIOT       ARSENIC              SAL CRUSHTOOTH
         189   INSOLENT IDIOT       ARSENIC              KILL ME
         190   INSOLENT IDIOT       UR BRAIN ON EGG      CAPTAIN MARBLE
         191   INSOLENT IDIOT       WOLB DEMIA           TONYA PHARDING
         192   INSOLENT IDIOT       SEKA                 THE THING
         193   INSOLENT IDIOT       ROLF ALDAG           CAPTAIN MARBLE
         194   INSOLENT IDIOT       BELANNA TORRES       TCHMIL
         195   INSOLENT IDIOT       GRINNON BEARIT       HONEY BEAR
         196   INSOLENT IDIOT       JOHAN MUSEEUW        CAPTAIN MARBLE
         197   INSOLENT IDIOT       SEKA                 SULLA
         198   RING D'BELL          100% COLUMBIAN       FRANC N' STEEN
         199   MARY ANN             THREEKARD            BOMBAY
         200   GRINNON BEARIT       SORN THE BALD        DEEP FRIED LARD

A strong 10 turn showing as Popularity Leader by Insolent Idiot (77% of this past
year's turns) makes him the new record holder by solidly passing Wehr Macht's old 60%
record.  Arsenic was our only repeat as This Week's Favorite, which isn't enough to
match Insolent Idiot's 20% record from last year.  Captain Marble going 3 turns (23%)
as Least Favorite, isn't quite enough to beat Biblish's 40% hated-by-the-fans record.

                                POPULARITY LISTS
      Most                                     Least
      Popular List         ID    Score* | Popular List         ID    Score*
      ------------         ----  ------ | ------------         ----  ------
      100% COLUMBIAN       4874      58 | CAPTAIN MARBLE       4634    -58
      THREEKARD            4600      39 | FRANC N' STEEN       4649    -44
      GRINNON BEARIT       2955      39 | DEEP FRIED LARD      4975    -42
      SEKA                 4612      35 | TCHMIL               4435    -39
      ARSENIC              4285      32 | RONDOL QUIGLO        4978    -38
      PROBUS               4910      31 | SUCULANT             3589    -37
      ROLF ALDAG           4436      28 | OLGON PUY            4968    -27
      YRRAP LATOT          4464      27 | THE THING            4927    -26
      BELANNA TORRES       4898      27 | VALLET               4963    -25
      RING D'BELL          4300      24 | HONEY BEAR           3032    -24
      UR BRAIN ON EGG      4703      24
      * - Scores derived from position in Most Popular and Least Popular Lists

Okay, we've got a new way of tracking popularity this time around.  A warrior gets 11
points for being This Week's Favorite.  After that, going down the 'other ten most
popular fighters' list, the first on that list gets 10, the second gets 9, etc.  The
least popular works the same way but with negative points.  Of course, this makes it
impossible to compare with previous reports, but too bad.  I like it this way and
you'll just have to live with it unless you want to start writing your own reports.
So, nyah!

                            THE FEARD AND THE AFRAID
                    Turn  Most Avoided         Most Avoiding
                    ----  ------------         -------------
                    188   SRETSAMLEUD          THE CORPS
                    189   SUPERIOR FORCES 6K   MYSTIC ORC FEAST
                    190   SCREEN DREAMS        SRETSAMLEUD
                    191   ROUBAIX PELETON      SRETSAMLEUD
                    192   ROYAL FLUSH          SCREEN DREAMS
                    193   FANTASTIC FIVE       THE FEDERATION
                    194   THE BEAR'S PAW       SCREEN DREAMS
                    195   COFFEE RULES!        DON'T PLAY...
                    196   COFFEE RULES!        CARNIVAL
                    197   ROYAL FLUSH          ROUBAIX PELETON
                    198   COFFEE RULES!        THE BEAR'S PAW
                    199   MYSTIC ORC FEAST     SPOONERTIKS
                    200   ROYAL FLUSH          THE FEDERATION

For once, I am on neither the Most Avoided nor Most Avoiding lists.  So, I have
apparently achieved a state of ambivalence among the other managers here in North
Fork.  Cool.  In other news, both Royal Flush and Coffee Rules! managed to be most
avoided 3 times (23%), making them the new record holders (over the old 20% record
jointly held by 6 different teams).  On the side of 'tucking their tail and running',
we have Sretsamleud, Screen Dreams and The Federation all showing up twice.  However
it's Mystic Orc Feast that holds the shyness record at 30%.

                      THE 5 LONGEST FIGHTS OF THE LAST YEAR
TCHMIL slimly won victory over HONEY BEAR in  34  minutes
TCHMIL savagely defeated CAPTAIN MARBLE in  23  minutes
REHSAB luckily beat FRANC N' STEEN in  23  minutes
SAL CRUSHTOOTH was outlasted by MOTO RULES YOU in  22  minutes
KILL ME was out waited by THE THING in  22  minutes
* - The average fight length was 2.86 minutes.

Manic Fuhrer still holds the longest fight record at 43 minutes.  Also, our average
fight time is down from the 3.61 minutes of last year.  Those would be the positive
aspects of the Scum War, er, I mean, Turf War ending here in NF.

                THE 5 HIGHEST FIGHT TIME TOTALS OF THE LAST YEAR
                        Name                  Total Time
                        ----                  ----------
                        TCHMIL                   106
                        CAPTAIN MARBLE           104
                        HONEY BEAR                95
                        ONE HIT WONDER            95
                        FRANC N' STEEN            87

An average of 8.15 minutes per turn is an impressive feat there, Tchmil.  However,
it's only about half what you did last year with 16.2 minutes per turn on average.
Slowing down in your old age (or is that speeding up?).

                            THE TOP 10 UPCHALLENGES
Challenger          Challenged           Rec
----------          ----------           ---
TRITON              INSOLENT IDIOT       109 (Not even close to Sir Lancelot's 154 pt
                                             record.)
ACE RELIEVER        BEAR KEEPER           78
SPAM THING          BORUS GALARGUS        59
ACE BAILEY          100% COLUMBIAN        54 (Talk about a serious jonesin' for
                                             java.)
ZEEL BEBUB          BEAR KEEPER           51
ACE BAILEY          100% COLUMBIAN        48 (All that caffeine isn't good for you.)
HONEY BEAR          JOHAN MUSEEUW         46
KAIN PILLER         CJ                    42
INCREDIBLE SULK     ESPRESSO              41 (As I can well attest to.)
WOLB DEMIA          INSOLENT IDIOT        41

                           THE WORST 10 DOWNCHALLENGES
Challenger           Victim               Rec
----------           ------               ---
PROPHET              THE CAPTAIN          -29 (Bad, but not as bad as Wolfgang Duck's
                                              -60 point down challenge record.)
THE CAPTAIN          MR CROWLEY!          -28 (I guess Cap. wanted to see what it was
                                              like on the other side.)
CHARITY              THE GENERAL          -26
INSOLENT IDIOT       MONGOOSE             -24 (Now that's just mean, not dumb.)
'BOUT MY TIME!       HADES                -19 (Okay, now there's just something
                                              appropriate about this particular down
                                              challenge.)
CHAKOTAY             GANYMEDE             -18
FAITH                'BOUT MY TIME!       -16
LATTE                GABHAN               -16
YRRAP LATOT          MOTO JOJO            -14
CHAKOTAY             'BOUT MY CAR!        -13
* - Bloodfeuds and challenges by the Chartered Recognition Leader were excluded.
* - The average recognition difference for a challenge was 6.39 points.

Our average challenge difference is slightly down from last year's 6.43 points.

                                  KILLS REPORT
     Total Kills:  10 (Wow, that's a whopping average of .77 kills per turn.  People
are going to start thinking we're Andorian over here.  Our record is 4.1 per turn
from 2 years ago.)
          Team                 Kills | Warrior              ID    Kills
          ----                 ----- | -------              ----  -----
          THE BEAR'S PAW           2 |

Kat was the only one managing more than 1 kill this past year.  None of our warriors
got past one.  That's kind of sad.  I guess I'll have to reminisce about our records
held by Mystic Orc Feast (7 kills in 10 turns or .7/turn) and the warrior Pacifism (3
in 10 or .3 per turn).

                                 TOURNEY REPORT
          Tournament       Level          Warrior              Record
          ----------       -----          -------              ------
          Summer Face      Primus         King Pin             9-3-0
          Summer Face      Champions      Cincinattus          8-3-0
          Summer Face      Apprentice     Scorpion King        11-3-2
          Summer Face      Apprentice     Ur Brain On Egg      11-3-0
          Fall Mail-In     Primus         King Pin             9-3-1
          Fall Mail-In     Initiates      Zeel Bebub           8-2-0
          Winter Face      Initiates      Ellie Mae            9-3-1
          Spring Mail-In                  None

Wow, this past spring sucked.  We're going soft around here.

                                    GRADUATES
BEARNICE (2847), BORUS GALARGUS (4224), CINCINATTUS (4356), ELIA ANINUS (4222),
ESPRESSO (4556), INSOLENT IDIOT (4387), and PERFECT TEN (4218)

7 total graduates for an average of .54 per turn.  That's well below our record 1 per
turn average.

                                    NEW TEAMS
BLACK JACK HAMMER, DARK MATTER, DEAD GAWDS, DON'T PLAY..., DREWS CREW, FEMME FATALE,
SLITHER, and WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE

Welcome to the handful of new teams we picked up.  Our record, set during last year's
Turf War was a whopping 19 in 10 turns!  That's going to be tough to beat.

Well, there you have it.  A year's worth of worthless data.  If that hasn't numbed
your senses and dulled your mind, then next year should do the trick when I add a new
category.  What, you want to know what it is?  Well, I guess you'll just have to
stick around and read it next year, won't you.

Good bye and someone change Carny's medication 'cause I don't think the current stuff
is working.

                    --Drake

                         North Fork's Swampvivor Competition
                                     Turn 13

Yeeeeee Haaaaaaaaaaaaw!  Welcome to da Swamp.

Turn 13, and a few surprises, as a couple of warriors received early invites, and a 
we find a few others not making the return trip back from the Philly Phacer.   And 
add to this, with only 8 Swampvivor teams active going into the turn, it was expected 
that the results would start to get a lot tighter.  Well, there was certainly no 
disappointment in this last respect, as the difference between which team was 
eliminated and not, came down to participation in the personal ads, and writing a 
reasonably good spotlight.  How did this happen you say, well, before personal ads 
and spotlights were accounted for, our beloved Carnival was at 169 points, while 
Screen Dreams were at 171, and Coffee Rules were at 194.  But with Carny's personal 
ads, he passed Fizban's Screen Dreams, and then blew by the field with the 200 point 
bonus for having the only non-Crippian spotlight.

So we now have to bid adieu to the Screen Dreams, and the Swampvivor competition is 
now down to a magnificent seven.

Team updates:

CARNIVAL - 5 points for spotlight.  5 Points for personal ads, 200 bonus points for 
spotlight, Total score for turn 13 - (179 points)
Bear Keeper - 50 points for win, 2 points for #11 Pop
Threekard - 15 points for challenge, 34 points for #2 Pop
Franc N'Steen - 26 points for win
Perfect Parri - 52 points for win
Foggy - 10 point penalty for getting killed

COFFEE RULES - 25 points for TOM#4.  Total score for turn 13 - (194 points)
Bombay - 52 points for win, 38 points for challenge, 65 point penalty for second 
least popular.
101 Proof! - 0 points
Sugar Cube - 21 points for challenge
Latte - 26 points for win, 15 points for challenge,
100% Columbian - 52 points for win, 30 points for #3 most popular.

DRAKE'S COMICS - 5 points for personal ads - Total score for turn 13, (406 points)
Quicksilver - 40 points for challenge, 15 points for #7 pop.
Incredible Sulk -52 points for win, 120 points for graduation
The Mighty Sore - 66 points for win, 81 points for challenge.
Vallet - 13 points for challenge
Captain Marble - 14 points for challenge.

MYSTIC ORC FEAST - 96 points for Team on Move,   Total score for turn 13 - (345 
points)
Fat Back Frag - 23 points for challenge, 22 point penalty for #8 unpopular.
Deep Fried Lard - 52 points for win, 72 point penalty for least popular.
Ur Brain on Egg - 52 points for win, 9 points for Strike master, 8 points for #9 Pop
One Hit Wonder - 52 points for win, 21 points for challenge, 7 points for Scummmaster
Cup Of Cat - 26 points for win, 14 points for challenge, 79 points for up & coming 
champion.

ROYAL FLUSH - 25 points for long spot.  5 points for Pads, 33 points for TOM #2,  
Total Score for turn 13 -  (230 points)
King Crab - 26 points for win, 14 points for challenge, 42 points for up & coming 
adept, 2 point penalty for #11 Unpop
Ten O'Chtitlan - 26 points for win
Black Jack Shelack - 34 points for challenge
Ace Bailey - 0 Points
Queen of Denial - 25 points for win.

SCREEN DREAMS -  Total score for turn 13 - (171 points) - Eliminated from Swampvivor
Mary Ann - 18 points for challenge, 103 points for Graduation
Seka - 26 points for win, 16 points for challenge
Norma Jean - 0 points
Lara Croft - 12 points for challenge, 4 point penalty for #10 Unpop.
CJ - 0 points

SPOONERTIKS - 69 points for Top Chartered Team, 242 points for current top team, 5 
points for Personal Ads - Total score for turn 13 (870 points)
Toonerspik - 0 points
Jumbo Mumbo - 25 points for win, 129 points for DM, 65 points for chartered 
recognition leader, 10 points for wastemaster
Zeel Bebub - 52 points for win, 10 points for bashmaster, 264 points for graduation.
Tent in Quarantino - 25 points for win, 3 points for aimmaster, 29 point penalty for 
#7 Unpopular
Kain Pillar - 0 points

THE BEAR'S PAW - 26  points for TOM#3, 5 points for Personal Ads, 200 bonus points 
for best personal ad.  Total score for turn 13 - (271 points)
Grinnon Bearit - 52 points, 36 points for pop leader, 15 points for Lungemaster, 11 
points for #8 Pop
Can't Bearit - 0 points
Honey Bear - 0 points
Bear Acuda - 25 points for win, 24 points for up & coming C.Init, 2 points for 
Plungemaster
Bearfoot - 52 points for win, 23 points for #5 Pop

SWAMPVIVOR TURN 13 RESULTS (200 point bonuses included in scores)

TEAM Score Bonus
1. SPOONERTIKS (523)  870
2. THE BEAR'S PAW (150) 471 "200"
3. DRAKE'S COMICS (463) 406
4. CARNIVAL (411)  379 "200"
5. MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416) 345
6. ROYAL FLUSH (48)  230
7. COFFEE RULES! (505) 194
8. SCREEN DREAMS (488) 171 ELIMINATED

SWAMP JEOPARDY STANDINGS AFTER TURN 13 (bonus points not included)

TEAM      Score Bonus  Last Turn
 1. THE BEAR'S PAW (150)  11404171 "400" 1
 2. MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)  9747 "200" 2
 3. SPOONERTIKS (523)   8010   3
 4. ROYAL FLUSH (48)   6354   4
 5. COFFEE RULES! (505)  5987 "400" 5
 6. SCREEN DREAMS (488)  3685 "600" 6
 7. DRAKE'S COMICS (463)  3413 "200" 7
 8. CARNIVAL (411)   3145 "1200" 8
 9. ARGOSSEANS (468)   1048   9
10. THE FEDERATION (539) 848 "200" 10
11. THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506) -465 "600" 12

I believe this is the first time that there was no exchange of positions in the 
rankings in Swamp Jeopardy.  Roubaix Peleton dropped out from the #11 spot, which 
allowed the Middle Way 3 to move up by one.  Also, noted was the fact that the Middle 
Way did not contribute personal ads this turn.  Is this one of the signs of the 
forthcoming apocalypse?

Crip
MC of the Swampvivor and Swamp Jeopardy Competitions
Mngr of Royal Flush

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                                SWAMPVIVOR, CARNIVAL

     "HURRY!  HURRY!  STEP RIGHT OVER HERE!  'Tis I, The Button's Pitch.  Have I 
ever?  I repeat!  Yes, I repeat, have I ever misled you?  Of course not, I agree.  I 
have her right here.  The one you have waited all night for, born seven miles from 
land and seven miles from sea, all the way from Andoria's fair cities, the lovely and 
mysterious one  herself, I GIVE YOU... FORTUNE TELLER!!!"
     "Thank you, Buttons, thank you!  You know I do not shirk delicate questions, but 
some have brought up the subject of 11 million points.  I will not discuss this 
question.  Also, I do not advise this, but perhaps at midnight taking up pitchforks 
and burning torches and attacking Crip's castle might bring an anwer... NO, NO do not 
applaud, I do not advise such action.....
     Now I've been asked for the secret of winning in SWAMPVIVOR.  There is no 
secret, only steps to be taken to protect yourself.  I will give you some secret and 
arcane wisdom they do not wish you to know.  The fainthearted should leave now... 
Putting on ring armor wrong side out will bring you luck against slashers... Beware 
of any warrior who carries a lump of coal and has doubled up letters in their name.  
They tend to be very superstitious...  If you see a rooster and hen sitting side by 
side on the morning of a fight it is a sure sign of good luck...  Carrying the 
knucklebone of a sheep when fighting a PR brings good luck...  Remember this, a 
twisted quarterstaff seldom breaks...  Seeing three crows together is good luck, one 
crow is bad luck...  If a cuckoo bird flies over the arena while you are fighting, 
avoid stepping on a hair you chance to see on the sand.  Dropping your weapon during 
a fight has been studied but not proven to bring very bad luck...  If you have lost 
two fights in a row, write this on the handle of your sword, "Be the elf what it may, 
this is mighty to amend,"... If your fire is still burning when you wake in the 
morning do not fight that day...  Do not sharpen a knife after sunset or put bread on 
a knife to be toasted in a fire on a Friday morn--brings very bad luck...  Sneezing 
on an opponent at desperation will add attack skills...  I can confirm that it is a 
silly superstition to think that weighing a goose or a gander before fighting an AB 
will increase your riposte skills, although many will tell you exactly that...  If 
you meet a pair of white horses before fighting a lunger it is not wise to spit in 
the wind."
     "I thank you, FORTUNE TELLER, CARNIVAL!"

     >)]H[(< + -----:----- + >)] The Free Cities #66 [(< + -----:----- + >)]H[(<

Ibizond, Korga, and in between:

     Fist of Kjarran strode briskly along the road that ran east from Ibizond.  It
would eventually reach Malcorn and then Zuwayza, but that was several days away even
if nothing came of this effort to catch the killer.  What kind of man, he wondered
would haunt a lonely stretch of road and kill only single travelers after dark?  A
coward, for one thing.  But it might be useful to consider the other factors; after
all, the ambush ahead that was supposed to catch the killer might fail.  He could end
up fighting alone.  His hand caressed the hilt of his sword.  And he'd do very well
by himself, if he had to.
     The Murskan, Cadal, believed the killer was a non-human monster of some sort,
perhaps a demon.  It would be a feather in his cap to kill a demon....  But he had to
remember that he wasn't out here for glory, even when the glory would honor mighty
Kjarran, and his daughter Jayde, too, of course.  He was here to rid the area of a
killer.  He peered sharply into the trees on either side of the road.  Though the sun
had not yet vanished behind the western hills, the woods were already filled with
shadow.  Anything could be hiding there.
     In fact, Aghtamar, Zilla, and Cadal were hiding there, somewhere a little
farther ahead.  No human would detect them, Fist believed.  Cadal might be a semi-
barbarian, as all the Murskans were, and a second-rate gladiator (for a Lord
Protector), but he knew what he was doing in the woods.  Fist sighed and shook his
head.  What the Murskans should be doing in the woods was cutting down the trees and
planting beans.  Oh, well.  Doubtless that would come in time, as they absorbed
civilization from their more enlightened neighbor, the Glorious Empire.
     Meanwhile, there was the killer.  The sun was balanced on the rim of the hills,
and the shadows were stretching out of the forest and across the road.  It was time 
for the killer to appear.
     As though his thought had conjured the sound, he heard hoofs on the road ahead
of him.  No one had mentioned the killer being mounted.  Could this be a chance
victim?  Some unfortunate traveler from the east who didn't know the risk he was
taking?  The rider was still out of sight, as the road ahead curving and slanting
into a valley dark with trees.  That valley would be a good place for the killer to
set his ambush....  Or for Cadal to set his!  Fist had a sudden vision of the killer
and the gladiators facing each other across the road, waiting for a victim to walk
into their trap.  He resisted the urge to laugh; after all, it could be true!  He
also resisted the urge to break into a run, which would tire out him right when he
might be needing his full strength.
     Somewhere ahead, but farther away than the horseman, a hound bayed, answered by
two more.  At least, Fist of Kjarran was fairly sure they were hounds, and not
wolves.  But it was enough to make anyone's blood run cold, and that alone might have
scared a timid traveler to death.  And who would be hunting with hounds along this
road at night?  Fist wasn't a country boy, but something seemed out of step in this.
Maybe the killer used the hounds to terrify his victims?  In any case, the horsemen
in the valley was in danger.
     Fist paused to listen.  He had lost track of the hoofbeats when he'd heard the
baying, but now he picked them up again.  They were faster-paced, but...they didn't
seem to be getting any closer.  He shuddered in sympathy for the rider as he hurried
ahead.  It must be like one of those nightmares where you run and run and can't
escape.
     Darkness filled the little valley like a pool of water.  Fist had the
unreasonable feeling that he should hold his breath as he descended.  There was a
thin wail from below, then shouts and the clangor of swords.  He broke into a trot.
Some other traveler must have drawn the killer and sprung the ambush before he got
there!
     At the bottom of the valley, the road crossed a stream.  The woods were broken
there so that some moonlight came down onto the bridge and the struggle going on
there.  Swords flickered in reflected moonlight, and shadows surged back and forth.
Fist drew his sword.  One shadow detached itself from the struggle.  It was
silhouetted briefly against the white foam of the stream: a gigantic hound, black as
hate except for crimson ears and eyes that burned like fire.  It bayed as it raced
along the road toward Fist of Kjarran.
     Fist shuddered.  You didn't have to be timid for that sound and sight to freeze
your blood!  But he was a gladiator, a Lord Protector, a faithful follower of Kjarran
and Jayde.  No dog was going to intimidate him.  He steadied his sword to receive the
charge.

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                        ---===FREE BLADES REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 471): BLUE DUCK of BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 469): EQUALIZER of THE LAWMEN (?, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 465): DIRT KNAP of UNKNOWNS XX (Dark Spirit, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 466): PA ELL of WAY OF THE SWORD (? mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 464): DUSK of DELTA DOOM (Barnabas, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 463): KANDY KANES of CARNIVAL (Carny, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 231): RAPAX of THE PENTARCHY (The Pentalque, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 455): MR. YUCK of THE TAKEN (Stillgard, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 229): DELWYNNDWN of THE NIGHTHAWKS (Firehawk, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 451): PICKLED PIGSKIN of BUFFY'S DINER (Alfredo Frothingslosh)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 449): APATHY of WHEN DOGMA FAILS (Prophet, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 442): KING BEAR of THE BEARS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 406): SUNGOD DESIGNED ME of WENSINWASIN (Youngblood, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 206): SUNFLASH of NORTHERN LIGHTS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 200): JUMBO MUMBO of SPOONERTIKS (Spawn, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 187): CLOUDS AWAY of OPEN SESAME (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 330): 4-0 PROLENE of GENERAL SURGERY (Darkfist, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 310): ON MY WAY of SADISTS F2F (SunGod, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 136): JUSTICE of PEACE MAKERS (Solomon, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 356): NEMESIS of CHAMPIONS from JHELUM (Shadowgate, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 471): DARK TOADS (TigToad, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 469): BLOODSUCKERS (Way Cool, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 465): UNKNOWNS XX (Dark Spirit, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 466): WYLDERNESS WYLD (?, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 464): KINDRED OF KAOS (PTFT, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 463): CARNIVAL (Carny, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 231): UGLY URBAN ORCS (Slugbait, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 455): DEATH THREAT (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 229): UNFIT TO BE ORCS (Slugbait, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 451): DEVIL ADVOCATES (Dark One, mgr.)
 DM  33 ANASAZI (turn 449): WHEN DOGMA FAILS (Prophet, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 442): COMIC MAYHEM (Phantasm, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 406): THE FAMILY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 206): DYNASTIC (Jack Wolfspider, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 200): SPOONERTIKS (Spawn, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 187): DARK SIDHE (Daehir, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 330): GENERAL SURGERY (Darkfist, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 310): FAVORITE GUYS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 136): WAY TO GO! II (Spawn, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 356): MEOW MIX, etc. (Ultraist, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 471): BLUE DUCK of BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 468): LIFE SENTANCE of THE LAWMEN (?, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 464): MALASION of THE BLACKHEARTS (Nunzio Frothingslosh, mgr.)
                           N.D. GRASSE of PUNNY AMINALS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 464): KILLIN' STU of MINIONS OF MILO (Kleptov Grenufelbitz)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 463): KANDY KANES of CARNIVAL (Carny, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 231): BATMANNING (28-3402) CANADIAN BACON (Firehawk, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 229):ODYSSEUS of OVERLORDS (The Icelord, mgr.)
                               KRAC D'CHEVALIERS of THE STORMGUARDS (The Icelord)
                               BABBS BUNNY of LOONY TOONS (Rascally Rabbit, mgr.)
                   (turn 228): SIR YDER of WILLBENDERS (Abraxis, mgr.)
                               BONEGRIN DEVAR of BUSHMASTERS (Tripwire, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 450): LIGHTNING of HARBINGERS (High Lord Bosk, mgr.)
 DM  33 ANASAZI (turn 448): RYANATOR of OBSIDIAN HALL (Dameon Darkheart, mgr.)
                            LEMON DROP of JOYS OF BOOZE (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 205): DEBBIE DAHMER of MORDRED'S MADMEN (Abraxis, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 200): ZEEL BEBUB of SPOONERTIKS (Spawn, mgr.)
                               INCREDIBLE SULK of DRAKE'S COMICS (Drake, mgr.)
                               MARY ANN of SCREEN DREAMS (Fizban, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 187): CLOUDS AWAY of OPEN SESAME (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 135): PUNCH DRUNK of WAY TO GO! II (Spawn, mgr.)
                            MOONSTONE of FLAMING FIST (Firehawk, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Greetings Forkers...

A brief chat this time, as the boss is v v busy... and still bemoaning the 
unexpectedly early departures of Zeel Bebub (early invite), Toonerspik and Kain 
Piller (face to face deaths)... number wise these three were the pick of the team 
(two 21/17 and a 17/21 WIT/WILL !!)... *sigh*... Still Zeel makes my first BA 
graduate, and takes my total to 8/10 styles.. still need a PS and PL to round off all 
10...

What with all these new invites going around I expect I'll get the call if I win this 
cycle... that'll just upset the boss a little more.. oh well...

Wonder if Drake has done his review this turn?? Am looking forward to it!!

Laters.... Jumbo M.

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings, Warriors of NORTH FORK.  Allow this humble servant Novgorodny Vir to 
give you a respite from the fights in the form of this Spyreport.  Nothing is certain 
in NORTH FORK, with changing loyalties, changing Duelmasters.  Write this down:  new 
top team--COFFEE RULES!.  Those betting on FALLEN SHADOWS lost their shirt, as FALLEN 
SHADOWS lost their fighting abilities:  0-0-0.  What's a move up by 6 you ask?  
(alright, maybe you didn't ask)  Cause for celebration, according to LAND OF OZ.  Say 
what you will about blind luck and dirty fighting, but COFFEE RULES! will tell you 
70-55-2 is nothing to laugh at...  Like a new team fighting for the first time and 
entering the official rankings, BORDEAUX - SAINTES got 4-1-0 to come in 11th.  Well, 
MY DAY, you can show this to your parents.  But you'll have to do better than 3-2-0 
if you want your names in this space again...  Practice pays for ACE BAILEY, who 
pummelled 100% COLUMBIAN, to pocket 23 points.  SEKA certainly had a baffled 
expression on hers face, after losing to SUGAR CUBE and losing 15 points in the 
process!  You could cut the tension with a scimitar as THREEKARD of CARNIVAL met the 
Duelmaster.  Those who hoped for a new Duelmaster were disappointed by THREEKARD, of 
CARNIVAL, who despite a 13-8-1 couldn't overcome NORTH FORK's Number 1.  So who was 
the warrior seen charging into immovable walls and challenging dead trees?  Someone's 
got a basic problem...   
     So much to report, so little time!  Perhaps the warriors of THE BEAR'S PAW 
should take up some hobbies, as they are the most avoided team...  As a woman of good 
breeding scorns the "warriors" of ROYAL FLUSH, so did that sorry team shy from THE 
BEAR'S PAW If challenges were horses, CAN'T BEARIT could open up a fast food joint!  
Place your bets!  BLACK JACK SHELACK is the long shot of the week:  they challenged 
UR BRAIN ON EGG, up by 35.  The gods smiled upon BLACK JACK SHELACK, in his upset 
fight against UR BRAIN ON EGG.  BLACK JACK SHELACK gets a win, 26 points, and a free 
drink on me.  (Next week, OK?) QUICKSILVER challenged RAINBOW!  Who says DRAKE'S 
COMICS are just a bunch of wimps!  QUICKSILVER of DRAKE'S COMICS kept his wits as he 
beat RAINBOW.   
     Like the wind whispering among the pines, do hearest I many disquieting rumors.  
Those who owe ZEEL BEBUB of SPOONERTIKS money and had written him off, take note:  
he'S BACK FROM THE DARK ARENA!!!  AND he'S MAD!!!  DARK CHAMPION in the Dark Arena 
wasn't enough for INCREDIBLE SULK of DRAKE'S COMICS.  Maybe that certain serving 
girl(?) at The Warty Toad will be!  Ask not a spymaster for counsel, for he will 
pontificate long after you have fallen into an unconscious stupor.   
     Leave me now, you base fools!  More important duties call me.  Do not despair!  
I shall return!-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JUMBO MUMBO 4714             17   1  1   138       SPOONERTIKS (523)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 GRINNON BEARIT 2955          21  14  2   124       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 THE MIGHTY SORE 4490         14  10  0   115       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
 THREEKARD 4600               13   8  1   102       CARNIVAL (411)
 BLACK JACK SHELACK 4850      10   6  0    99       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 SUGAR CUBE 4617              13   9  0    98       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 ONE HIT WONDER 4680          14   5  0    94       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 BEAR KEEPER 3782             21  27  2    92       CARNIVAL (411)
 TENT IN QUARANTINO 4816      14   3  0    92       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 CUP OF CAT 4926               9   4  0    91       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 101 PROOF!! 4495             15  11  0    90       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 STRAW FIRE 4350              10   6  0    90       LAND OF OZ (217)
-BIBASH 4338                  11   5  1    88       THE BIB BOYS (481)
 HONEY BEAR 3032              17  13  0    81       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 SEKA 4612                    11  11  0    77       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 UR BRAIN ON EGG 4703         10   7  0    77       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 JEM KATOREH 4499             17  20  1    72       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 BULFUR 5041                  18  13  0    71       MEL'S DRAGOONS (553)
 FOLMOR GRIGG 4501            15  22  0    67       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FRANC N' STEEN 4649          14   5  0    66       CARNIVAL (411)
-BIBER 4310                   11   5  0    66       THE BIB BOYS (481)
 QUEEN OF DENIAL 4896          7   7  0    66       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 BROOMSTICK 4474               7   7  0    65       LAND OF OZ (217)
 PROBUS 4910                   6   4  0    62       WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE (541)
 LATTE 4667                   13   7  0    61       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 BELANNA TORRES 4898           7   7  0    58       THE FEDERATION (539)
 ACE BAILEY 4948               5   6  0    57       ROYAL FLUSH (48)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 100% COLUMBIAN 4874           8   6  1    55       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 VESPASIAN 4932                6   6  0    54       WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE (541)
 LICINIUS 4912                 5   4  0    54       WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE (541)
 CAPTAIN MARBLE 4634          10  10  0    52       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
 NEDDIE OGIL 4663             10  11  0    48       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 DEEP FRIED LARD 4975          8   0  0    48       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
-BIBLISH 4309                  6  10  0    48       THE BIB BOYS (481)
 KIRA NERYS 4941               6   4  1    47       THE FEDERATION (539)
 COURAGE 4552                  5   4  1    47       LAND OF OZ (217)
 KING CRAB 4983                4   3  0    44       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 BEAR ACUDA 4995               3   2  0    44       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
-SUCULANT 3589                11  10  0    43       WARHAMMERS (75)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BEARFOOT 4875                 8   7  0    43       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 GALLIENUS 4956                4   5  1    41       WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE (541)
-TEMPUS 4635                   7  12  1    40       WARHAMMERS (75)
-DALE DROMMON 4262             5   1  0    39       CON'S CREW (474)
 AUGUSTUS 4909                 3   6  0    37       WHOLY ROMAN EMPIRE (541)
 SORN THE BALD 5037            9   9  0    36       MEL'S DRAGOONS (553)
-SNAKETONGUE SAM 4263          4   1  1    36       CON'S CREW (474)
 RAINBOW 4553                  5   5  0    34       LAND OF OZ (217)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 QUICKSILVER 5029              2   1  0    33       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
 VALLET 4963                   6   4  0    30       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
 PERFECT PARRI 4967            4   6  0    29       CARNIVAL (411)
-FINAL PRAYER 790              3   0  1    29       FORLORN HOPE (78)
 JADZIA-DAX 4900               6   8  0    28       THE FEDERATION (539)
 LARA CROFT 4980               4   3  0    27       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 BORN LOSER 5032               4   1  0    25       MEL'S DRAGOONS (553)
 SEVEN OF NINE 4940            5   4  0    24       THE FEDERATION (539)
 TEN O'CHTITLAN 4982           4   3  0    24       ROYAL FLUSH (48)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BOMBAY 5043                   3   0  0    22       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 DELARUE 5091                  1   0  0    20       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
 RENAUD DION 5088              1   0  0    20       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
 AXE 4551                      5   4  0    19       LAND OF OZ (217)
-BIBLUNG 4420                  1   1  1    19       THE BIB BOYS (481)
-ARISTON 508                   2   2  0    17       FORLORN HOPE (78)
-SIR ROMANOWSKI 4265           2   4  0    14       CON'S CREW (474)
-JIAN 4428                     2   1  0    14       FALLEN SHADOWS (495)
 FRUSTRATION 5067              1   0  0    14       MY DAY (557)
 LAVERGNE 5092                 1   0  0    13       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
-COTTONMOUTH 3 5050            1   0  0    13       SLITHER (554)
 JEAN-LUC DELPECH 5089         1   0  0    13       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
-THE PRESIDENT 4266            1   4  0    11       CON'S CREW (474)
-GALENIUM 5015                 2   0  1    10       DARK MATTER (550)
 MUTUS BRAXIMUS 5095           1   0  0    10       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 STROKE BROKER 5094            1   0  0    10       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 CRABBS 5093                   1   0  0    10       CARNIVAL (411)
 RONDOL QUIGLO 4978            1   7  0    10       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
-LAST GOOD GUY 792             1   2  0     7       FORLORN HOPE (78)
 CHAOS 5065                    1   0  0     6       MY DAY (557)
-ADDER 5051                    1   0  0     6       SLITHER (554)
-DEATHSTORM 791                1   2  0     6       FORLORN HOPE (78)
-ZILIN SHI 4430                1   0  0     6       FALLEN SHADOWS (495)
 DABO GIRL 5023                1   2  0     5       THE FEDERATION (539)
-SHAN 4431                     1   2  0     5       FALLEN SHADOWS (495)
 TOE FOO 5054                  1   1  0     4       MEL'S DRAGOONS (553)
 MASS STUPIDITY 5068           1   0  0     3       MY DAY (557)
-ANGEL HEART 5014              0   2  0     2       DARK MATTER (550)
-JAMESINFREE 5011              0   2  0     2       DARK MATTER (550)
-SCOLLMORE 5012                0   2  0     2       DARK MATTER (550)
 JILL KELLY 5087               0   1  0     1       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 RONY MARTIAS 5090             0   1  0     1       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
-LUCIFERETTE 5053              0   1  0     1       WARHAMMERS (75)
-ANACONDA 5048                 0   1  0     1       SLITHER (554)
-COBRA 3 5047                  0   1  0     1       SLITHER (554)
 BUFFY 5086                    0   1  0     1       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 CARNAGE 5069                  0   1  0     1       MY DAY (557)
-HARPY 5013                    0   1  0     1       DARK MATTER (550)
 MAYHEM 5066                   0   1  0     1       MY DAY (557)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
CAN'T BEARIT 4994      1  4 1 THE BEAR'S PAW 150    MOUNTAIN TROLL 18     201 NONE    
RING D'BELL 4300      16 11 0 CARNIVAL 411          JUMBO MUMBO 4714      199         
FOGGY 5070             0  1 0 CARNIVAL 411          GALENIUM 5015         200         
DARK CHAMPION 24       0  1 0 DARK ARENA 0          ZEEL BEBUB 4713       201 NONE    
DARK CHAMPION 24       0  1 0 DARK ARENA 0          INCREDIBLE SULK 4511  201 NONE    
STRETCH RICHARDS 5016  0  1 0 DRAKE'S COMICS 463    CAN'T BEARIT 4994     197 REVENGED
LADY FIST 5031         0  4 0 MEL'S DRAGOONS 553    SHEWISH GIANT 21      201 NONE    
OLGON PUY 4968         0  7 0 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 506  GALLIENUS 4956        198         
FAT BACK FRAG 5052     0  3 0 MYSTIC ORC FEAST 416  SPYMASTER 22          201 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Spawn -- Missing some bodies?  Looks like a rough tournament.  -- Crip

Fizban -- You too appear to have some M.I.A.  If only the car hadn't broken down -- 
Crip

Kat -- What are you smoking?  Can I get some?  4 TV's, but none from North Fork = not 
as good a tourney as I would have liked.  But my stables in 21, 50, 54 and 60 aren't 
complaining.  Still Ace Bailey and King Crab both came close at 7-3.  Sneeze away. -- 
Crip

31 -- Sorry to hear of the misstimed event. -- Crip

31 -- A smell gift?  Is that like a bottle of perfume, or is it a caged skunked being 
courierred to Starry Gaze? -- Ace Bailey

Incredible Sulk-- Time to take your deep green hide out of the pouting corner and off 
to ADM. -- Black Jack Shellack

Neddie Ogil -- Although the skills weren't plentiful, I am sure they will be helpful.  
You certainly weren't what I was expecting, but I certainly won't complain. -- King 
Crab

Bombay -- If you are going to challenge the helpless old types, you should at least 
attempt the skill rape -- Ace Bailey

Dabo Girl -- Perhaps if you'd explain the rules to me first.  I mean other than 
having everyone jump up and down yelling DABO -- Ten O'Chtitlan

Gallienus -- We scouted you out during the tournament, of course, I couldn't put my 
anti-gallienus strategy to the test in a random match-up now could I -- Queen of 
Denial

Jumbo-Mumbo -- It's the biz. -- Carny

Zeel Bebub -- Ah, you teach initiative. -- Threekard

Belanna Torres -- A bold challenge, but a word of advice:  Never challenge anyone who 
stands with 12 wins.  No idea why, but now that you know you have an edge. -- Franc N 
Steen

Fat Back -- How can you challenge perfection? -- Perfect Parri

Honey Bear -- My apologies, but too much experience for you. -- Bear Keeper

Galenium -- Why?  Why?  Foggy had potential. -- Carny

All -- Welcome to Zensu.  All the way from Lyratilan, the ultra-modern en-passant 
style AB, Crabbs. -- Carny

Drake -- You?  Challenge me?  Don't you know?  Coffee Rules! -- Mr Coffee

One Hit Wonder -- I was starting to turn the fght but endurance previals.  I 
appreciate the learns. -- 101 Proof!!

Ace Baile -- 4 spoons instant Koolaid (fruit punch or lemonade works good), 4 spoons 
instant coffee, enough hot water to mix it together, add ice...then pour and mix I 
can soda (BOMBAY). -- Bombay

Crip -- HA!  Used your strategy on you.  Really didn't want to run this style but 
tired of wall of steel (or I should say, tired of making mothing but wall of steel 
warriors). -- Mr Coffee

Your Brain on Egg -- And your sword all over!  You thrashed me! -- Sugar Cube

Acinius -- Nothing personal. -- Latte

Crip -- And the competition gets better.  Down to the "best" now.  No more "free 
rides."  May the best manager win. -- Mr Coffee

It has taken a while, but finally I maintained control over the hot-air balloon, and 
therefore I have returned to accept the glory and honor due to the...Great And 
Wonderful Oz

Sir Crip -- You are running a tournament and not winning?  Perhaps you need some 
lessons. -- Oz The All-Knowing

I see that those Orcs are continuing to cause trouble to all.  Perhaps there is now 
some female influence? -- Oz The All-Amused

All -- I have missed you, and I regret my time away from the swamp.  Salute. -- Oz 
The All-Friendly

Drake -- I was indeed sorry to hear about your faulty compu-golem.  I shall send some 
geeky munchking to your aid. -- Oz The All-Helpful

Congratulations to Zeel Bebub, Incredible Sulk, and Mary Ann.  Some of North Fork's 
finest! (Especially that Mary Ann -- wink) -- The The Amazing

Frank n Stein -- Failing to pull the backup must mean she just had the need to punch 
you.  Can't help but admire a woman like that. -- 31

Ten O'Chtitlan -- I liked you better with the SM.  You got a permit to carry that 
thing? -- 31

Vespasian -- Great fight! -- Kira Nerys

Rondol Q -- We gotta quit meeting like this.  People will talk. -- Seven of Nine

Carny -- Thanks.  Hope to get the honor of battling you on the sands.  Good luck, -- 
Mel

Crip -- How does one enter the Swampivor comptition?  Is it too late to enter? -- Mel

North Fork -- Greetings and other pleasantries!  After much promotion by the oh-so-
loveable persian of persuasion on many forums, I've come to test my mettle in your 
charming arena.  I've brought the colorful "My Day" stable and will be entertaining 
interesting challenges while I learn my way around and prepare for the up-coming Turf 
War.  Life to you, warriors.  And everlasting glory. -- Slaughter Priest

All -- Now, let's see how you deal with My Day! -- Slaughter Priest

Jem Katoreh -- Didn't expect to survive that onslaught!! Good effort... -- Jumbo 
Mumbo

Threekard -- And I thought you'd be after Jumbo's blood... think I can see why you 
didn't though... thanks for letting me get up and pound you!! -- Zeel B

Carny -- You're as obscure as ever.  Care to share whatever it is you're taking? -- 
The Calico of Confusion: Kat

Asmo -- You just HAD to bring that darned contest here, didn't you.... -- The 
Mumbling Mancoon:  Kat

Mary Ann -- Sweetie...um.....no.  -- The Puddy Tat of Tsk Tsk, Kat

Mighty Sore -- Sorry, the punching bag has retired. -- The Kitten of Kornermen, Kat

Lady Fist -- Pardon last months fight, but Bear Acuda was late for a date. -- The 
Feline of Funtime;  Kat

Popularity Leader?  I'll never get that grin off his face... -- The Abyssinian of 
Awards;  Kat

Okay, these personals are late,  Sue me.  I couldn't get at a computer in time to do 
'em.

Captain Marble -- I was simply "marbelous" in that fight, wasn't I? -- Folmor Grigg
P.S.  Well, *I* liked it.

Bulfur -- (sneezing)  I think I'm allergic to dragoons. -- Jen Katoreh

Frank N'Steen -- Darn.  It was YOU who needed more stitches, not ME.  Darn. -- Neddie 
Ogil
P.S.  Will you feed my Orc while I'm in the hospital?

Deep Fried Lard -- Ah, but so tasty! -- Rondol Quiglo

We now return you to your regularly scheduled personals.  Thank you.

Cup Of Cat -- That's what Orcs like?  No wonder Neddie's is looking peaked. -- Folmor 
Grigg

King Crab -- Are those claws allowed? -- Neddie Ogil

Jumbo Mumbo -- A title match for me?  (sigh)  Always the bridesmaid.... -- Jem 
Katoreh

Seven of Nine -- Actually, that was only two.  If you'd hit me seven times, much less 
the full nine, I wouldn't have survived. -- Rondol Quiglo

18 July 2003
To All Managers -- I would like to take this time to announce that my alliance, The
Association, is no more.  Due to the dead weight managers of the alliance and their
lack of participation, DarkSpirit and I have formed a new alliance:  The Firm.  We
have taken on two members so far and are looking for a few more.  If you would like
to find out more about The Firm, you can diplo Dark Spirit, Unknowns XX in arena 15
or myself, Sungod, Sadists F2FII in arena 62.
                               --*  The Firm *--
                    Sungod -- Sadists F2FII -- 62
                    Dark Spirit -- Unknowns XX -- 15
                    Youngblood -- Wensinwasin -- 43
                    Tripwire -- Of Wolf and Man -- 1

26 July 2003
     Citizens of Alastari, a bright dawn has risen.  While you slept, a pernicious
force has entered the once-fair City of Aruak.  It fought alongside their treasured
warriors, it drank with their fans, and it slept with their women.  Now the masks are
coming off.
     Warriors, be afraid...be very afraid.  After years of Andorian managers ranting
that Aruak is the safest city in Alastari, the Frothingslosh Syndicate has selected
Aruak City as the home for its next epic 'contest'--Murder by Numbers II.  Our spies
have selected the warriors for extermination, and the executioners have had several
months to prepare.  Now a new age of darkness will descend upon Aruak, as the
Syndicate and its allies bring an entirely new level of competition to the arena!
Downchallenges!  Assassinations!  Small poodles as hors d'oeuvres!
     The Murder by Numbers II 'rules' will be announced next cycle.  However, we
invite all managers, from all corners of Alastari, to come to Aruak City and take
part...in one way or another.  Help defend the honor of a long heralded haven for the
pure, or join the forces of change in their siege of the ice-cream and cake
stronghold of the Dukes of Nerf-Dueling!
     This exercise is not for either the faint of heart or the weak willed.  Blood
will flow, brains will leak, and beer will be chugged.  Either way, we welcome you
with open arms and gleaming blades.
     This public service announcement has been brought to you by Frothingslosh Epic
Contests (tm), the number 86, and the letter 'K'.

The Frothingslosh Syndicate

29 July 2003
           *     *     *     *The Third Annual Turf War*     *     *     *
     Yes, it's time again for alliances to go to war!  TW3 will be held in DM 47
(North Fork) at a date to be  specified later--right after Crip's Incomprehensible
Contest is over...but I'm sure everyone wants to get their teams there soon!  Here
are the rules:

1.  Each alliance must have a leader declare the arrival of his alliance.  The leader
    will be responsible for verifying any and all teams/managers who declare to the
    alliance he/she is leading.
2.  Each manager, team declaring for the contest must have approval of the leader,
    donate one Roll-up Certificate ($5) to the prize pot (send it to me by diplo, by
    snail, or a note to customer service), and declare his/her team by diplo, p-ad or
    snail.
3.  Each team may declare one warrior as champion.  All points scored by a champ are
    double!
4.  Prizes are as follows (mostly...there WILL be some things added as the prize pot
    grows with entry donations--this list is not final!)
    *  Highest scoring alliance -- Rename Arena 47 for a period of 6 months, one half
       of the total prize pot donated; roll-up certs.
    *  The Alliance with the most returns from the DA will get to re-name the DA
       monsters for a period of 6 months.
    *  The alliance with the most warriors listed as style masters will get to pick
       the Alastari city/arena to host the next Grand Tournament.
    *  The warrior with the most front page honors/awards will have the Arenamaster
       named after him for a period of 6 months.
    *  The Alliance with the most front page Honors/Awards will have the honor of
        picking the *slow* arena to host the Fifth Annual Turf War.
    *  The team with the most listings as Style Master will find out the favorites of
       one of their warriors.
    *  The warrior with the most listings as Style Master will fight at my expense
       for five turns (I will transfer to the manager's account).
    *  The Alliance with the most kills will be able to re-name the stand-in warriors
       for a period of 6 months.
    *  The warrior that scores the most total points will fight at my expense for 5
       turns (I will transfer $7.50 to the manager's account).
    *  The team that scores the most total points will receive an extra share of
       roll-up certs from the prize pot.
     There may be more categories to come, and the prize pot still has to be
divided...I'm open to category/prize ideas--and further donations to the prize pot.
     The contest will run for *TEN* turns; prizes will be awarded at the end of the
11th turn.
     Scoring will be as follows:
* 5 points per fight, doubled for each of the following conditions met:
     -- Two Alliance     -- Champion
     -- Challenge        -- Two Champions
     -- Bloodfeud        -- Challenger losing
     -- Kill
     (Note:  DA losses are exempt, but DA wins will be *tripled*!!!  Ex:  Happy
Slasher goes to the DA and dies, no points are lost.  If he wins, his team scores 60
points!  If he was a champ, he scores 120 points!)
     Use the following chart to calculate scores:
Conditions Met:       0     1     2     3     4     5     6     7
Points Per Fight:     5    10    20    40    80   160   320   640
* Awards/Honors and Style Masters will each be awarded points also.  Find the total
number of each (do note add Awards and Style Masters together) and consult the graph
below.  Champs that score an award or style master count as two.
     1 --   5      7 --  320
     2 --  10      8 --  640
     3 --  20      9 -- 1280
     4 --  40     10 -- 2560
     5 --  80     11 -- 5280
     6 -- 100     (x2 for each extra)
Note -- These categories *count as "triple"*--they will be figured for each team,
*AND* again for each alliance *as well as* for each warrior!
*  Each and every mention in the Spy Report is worth 5 points...period.
*  TVs will be scored on the same scale as Awards/Style Masters, but the total points
will be x10.  TC's will be scored as TV's, but x10 more.
Number of TV/TC's          Points Scored (TV/TC)
     1      50/ 500
     2     100/1000
     3     200/2000
     4     400/4000
     +     x2/ x2 (for each extra)
     Each alliance will start with 5000 points, scores for *fights* will be added to
the winner's total *AND* deducted from the losers.
     Come  one and all, defend your turf and the honor of your alliance...or your
own!
                    Asmo Dius, TCB
                    Arenas, DM 47, DM 73

1 August 2003
     Assurnasirbanipal invites you to Talcama to participate in the third BATTLE
ROYAL contest.  It is a Delarquan contest so brutal that even some of Talcama's most
notable managers will refuse to participate.  The rules are simpler than any other
contest:  You may not avoid any other contest team.  There are no silly rules for who
can and can't compete.  Any team in Talcama is eligible to compete.  The scoring is
also quite simple (+1 for a win, +1 for a kill (+1 for the win), -1 for a loss) and
the first team to reach 25 points is the winner.
     Scoring will be live--the results for the turn posted in the newsletter.  The
winner will be able to fight their contest team in Talcama for free for 6 months but
more importantly will win a contest against some of the best managers who play the
game in one of the hardest contests in the game.
     First turn for BATTLE ROYAL 3 is Talcama Turn 465, which is due August 30.

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

ZEEL BEBUB butchered DARK CHAMPION in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
INCREDIBLE SULK slaughtered DARK CHAMPION in a 1 minute Dark Arena battle.
FAT BACK FRAG was assassinated by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
CAN'T BEARIT was dealt death by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena contest.
LADY FIST was narrowly killed by SHEWISH GIANT in a 2 minute Dark Arena match.
THREEKARD was bested by JUMBO MUMBO in a 4 minute expert's Bloodfeud Title brawl.
TENT IN QUARANTINO was savagely defeated by THE MIGHTY SORE in a 4 minute brawl.
101 PROOF!! unbelievably bested BEAR KEEPER in a 2 minute expert's Challenge duel.
SUGAR CUBE overpowered SEKA in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
CUP OF CAT overpowered JEM KATOREH in a 1 minute gruesome one-sided Challenge fight.
ONE HIT WONDER luckily beat MARY ANN in a exciting 3 minute veteran's Challenge fight.
BLACK JACK SHELACK handily defeated UR BRAIN ON EGG in a 1 minute Challenge contest.
KIRA NERYS was demolished by FRANC N' STEEN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge brawl.
VALLET was handily defeated by LICINIUS in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge conflict.
DEEP FRIED LARD defeated GALLIENUS in a 2 minute Challenge struggle.
BELANNA TORRES viciously subdued CAPTAIN MARBLE in a exciting 3 minute Challenge fray.
QUEEN OF DENIAL viciously subdued FOLMOR GRIGG in a popular 2 minute Challenge brawl.
KING CRAB was savagely defeated by PROBUS in a exciting 3 minute Challenge bout.
BEAR ACUDA overpowered AUGUSTUS in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge conflict.
SEVEN OF NINE was devastated by NEDDIE OGIL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
QUICKSILVER vanquished RAINBOW in a 1 minute gruesome one-sided Challenge match.
DABO GIRL lost to BORN LOSER in a popular 3 minute amateur's Challenge fray.
GRINNON BEARIT demolished STRAW FIRE in a action packed 1 minute one-sided fight.
BULFUR was luckily beaten by HONEY BEAR in a popular 3 minute gory expert's fight.
100% COLUMBIAN was luckily beaten by ACE BAILEY in a exciting 4 minute gruesome melee.
SORN THE BALD was handily defeated by COURAGE in a 1 minute brutal uneven bout.
LATTE handily defeated THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a 3 minute gory one-sided duel.
BEARFOOT was overpowered by BROOMSTICK in a 1 minute uneven duel.
VESPASIAN overpowered TEN O'CHTITLAN in a 1 minute one-sided match.
JADZIA-DAX was savagely defeated by PERFECT PARRI in a 1 minute brutal fight.
LARA CROFT beat AXE in a 1 minute bout.
RONDOL QUIGLO was outwaited by BOMBAY in a unpopular 7 minute match.
TOE FOO was vanquished by FRUSTRATION in a exciting 6 minute mismatched fight.
DELARUE demolished EMBEZZLING SCRIBE in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
MAYHEM was handily defeated by MUTUS BRAXIMUS in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
MASS STUPIDITY outlasted JILL KELLY in a 9 minute novice's conflict.
CARNAGE was vanquished by CRABBS in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
BUFFY lost to CHAOS in a 2 minute amateur's bout.
RENAUD DION demolished EMBEZZLING SCRIBE in a 1 minute uneven competition.
JEAN-LUC DELPECH overpowered CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
RONY MARTIAS was vanquished by STROKE BROKER in a 1 minute mismatched duel.
LAVERGNE demolished MORDANT DESERTER in a 1 minute uneven conflict.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  18         WALL OF STEEL     69 -  50 -  1      58  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 15         TOTAL PARRY       58 -  43 -  0      57  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   10         LUNGING ATTACK    88 -  76 -  3      54  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     10         STRIKING ATTACK   54 -  55 -  1      50  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   8         AIMED BLOW        28 -  30 -  0      48  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      4         PARRY-LUNGE       13 -  15 -  4      46  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         BASHING ATTACK    45 -  52 -  4      46  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         SLASHING ATTACK   15 -  25 -  0      38  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     2         PARRY-RIPOSTE      6 -  11 -  0      35  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    1         PARRY-STRIKE       4 -  17 -  0      19  |

Turn 201 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

WALL OF STEEL      8 -  2     BASHING ATTACK     3 -  5         4  WALL OF STEEL  
TOTAL PARRY        7 -  3     AIMED BLOW         1 -  2         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    8 -  7     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  2         1  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  2     PARRY-STRIKE       0 -  2         1  BASHING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     9 -  9     PARRY-RIPOSTE      0 -  1         1  AIMED BLOW     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    JUMBO MUMBO 4714           17   1  1  138 SPOONERTIKS (523)
LUNGING ATTACK   GRINNON BEARIT 2955        21  14  2  124 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
TOTAL PARRY      ONE HIT WONDER 4680        14   5  0   94 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
AIMED BLOW       TENT IN QUARANTINO 4816    14   3  0   92 SPOONERTIKS (523)
STRIKING ATTACK  UR BRAIN ON EGG 4703       10   7  0   77 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
BASHING ATTACK   BULFUR 5041                18  13  0   71 MEL'S DRAGOONS (553)
SLASHING ATTACK  COURAGE 4552                5   4  1   47 LAND OF OZ (217)
PARRY-LUNGE      BEAR ACUDA 4995             3   2  0   44 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is THREEKARD 4600.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was THREEKARD 4600.  The ten other most popular fighters were 100% COLUMBIAN 4874, 
BULFUR 5041, PROBUS 4910, THE MIGHTY SORE 4490, BORN LOSER 5032, BELANNA TORRES 4898, 
TOE FOO 5054, QUEEN OF DENIAL 4896, JUMBO MUMBO 4714, and ACE BAILEY 4948.

The least popular fighter this week was MASS STUPIDITY 5068.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were FRUSTRATION 5067, BOMBAY 5043, RONDOL QUIGLO 4978, BUFFY 5086, 
CARNAGE 5069, MAYHEM 5066, JADZIA-DAX 4900, TEN O'CHTITLAN 4982, BEARFOOT 4875, and 
SORN THE BALD 5037.

The following warriors will travel to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after next turn:

GRINNON BEARIT (47-2955) THE BEAR'S PAW (150)

The following warriors have traveled to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after fighting this turn:

MARY ANN (47-4378) SCREEN DREAMS (488)
INCREDIBLE SULK (47-4511) DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
ZEEL BEBUB (47-4713) SPOONERTIKS (523)