DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER

Date   : 11/04/2003    Duedate: 12/01/2003

NORTH FORK ARENA

DM-47    TURN-204

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

101 PROOF!!
COFFEE RULES! (505)
(47-4495) [17-12-0,116]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

THE MIGHTY SORE                NEER BEAR
DRAKE'S COMICS (463)           MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
(47-4490) [17-10-0,139]        (47-5073) [2-0-0,23]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

100% COLUMBIAN                 100% COLUMBIAN
COFFEE RULES! (505)            COFFEE RULES! (505)
(47-4874) [11-6-2,88]          (47-4874) [11-6-2,88]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

COFFEE RULES! (505)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. THE BEAR'S PAW (150)        54
2. LAND OF OZ (217)            52      SPOONERTIKS (523)
3. CARNIVAL (411)              49      Unchartered Team
4. MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)      44
5. THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)      26      MY DAY (557)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 2*BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)   7   3  0 70.0   1/ 2 COFFEE RULES! (505)      11  4 1
 2/ 1 SPOONERTIKS (523)         68  32  4 68.0   2/ 4 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   10  5 1
 3/ 3 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   209 118 17 63.9   3/ 8 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)      9  6 1
 4/ 4 LAND OF OZ (217)         369 259 11 58.8   4/ 1 SPOONERTIKS (523)         9  6 1
 5/ 5 COFFEE RULES! (505)       81  59  3 57.9   5/ 9 LAND OF OZ (217)          9  6 0
 6/ 6 DRAKE'S COMICS (463)     123  92  4 57.2   6/12*DREWS CREW (546)          8  7 0
 7/ 7 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         539 423 29 56.0   7/ 5 DRAKE'S COMICS (463)      7  6 0
 8/ 8*MY DAY (557)              10   9  0 52.6   8/ 6*MY DAY (557)              7  7 0
 9/ 9 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)     261 239 26 52.2   9/ 3 ROYAL FLUSH (48)          7  7 0
10/14*DREWS CREW (546)          10  10  0 50.0  10/10 THE FEDERATION (539)      7  7 0
11/10*MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)      2   2  0 50.0  11/11 CARNIVAL (411)            7  8 0
12/11 CARNIVAL (411)           134 136  7 49.6  12/13 SCREEN DREAMS (488)       6  5 2
13/13 THE FEDERATION (539)      39  43  1 47.6  13/14 PURE POISON (478)         4  5 1
14/17 SCREEN DREAMS (488)       56  81  5 40.9  14/17 FANTASTIC FIVE (477)      4  6 1
15/18 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    77 114  2 40.3  15/16 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    4  8 0
16-19 THE 7TH ORDER (294)       50  75  6 40.0  16/18*AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)     4 11 0
17/16 PURE POISON (478)         21  33  2 38.9  17- 7*BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)  3  2 0
18/20 FANTASTIC FIVE (477)      21  38  1 35.6  18/19*MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)     2  2 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/21*AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)      4  11  0 26.7  19-21 THE 7TH ORDER (294)       1  4 0
20/ 0*SWEET DESIRES (563)        1   4  0 20.0  20/ 0*SWEET DESIRES (563)       1  4 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

     The managers sat in the well worn wooden seats of the stands.  Carny, Crip,
Drake, Mr. Coffee, and Spawn all sat patiently watching, waiting.  At last the girl
arrived with the refreshments.
     Carny took his cup and turned to Crip.  "What is this crap, Crip?  Coffee?
What?  You and Mr. Coffee in cahoots in this competition?"  Carny twisted in his seat
his free hand waving wildly, coffee spilling from his theatrical tantrum.
     Spawn leaned close to Crip and said in a low voice, "You did get him decaf,
didn't you?"
     Crip smiled a thin, worn smile.  The crap was growing burdensome and even the
FLUSHLORD had had his fill.
     Carny, seeing the exchange, grew even more animated.  "What are you whispering
about?  It's a conspiracy!" he proclaimed.  "Drake, they are in it together!"
     Drake took his cup and turned to Carny.  "Would you calm down?"
     Carny spit out a mouthful of coffee in a fine spray.  "Not you too?" he asked.
He finished his coffee in two gulps and then began staring perplexedly at the grounds
at the bottom of the cup.  "Starry Gaze!"
     The purple clad psychic extraordinaire stepped forward.  "Sir?"
     "A reading!" Carny proclaimed, shoving the cup at his far-seeing minion.
     Starry Gaze poked at the grounds for a moment with a well sculpted nail that
would make Debbie Tonte anxious.
     "Well?  Well?" Carny asked anxiously.  Even the other managers leaned forward
for this fortuitous tidbit.
     Starry Gaze cleared her throat.  "...a refill..." she said.
     "Of course!" Carny said, snatching the cup away from Starry Gaze.  "More
coffee!"
     Mr. Coffee nodded at the hostess and she poured decaf for the Carnival Lord.
     The Swampvivor Five sat sipping their coffee as they watched their warriors
compete.  Would they do as well in the next contest?  Could they repeat their
success?  Only time would tell.

                                   (Coffee Rules!/Mr. Coffee, Mgr.)

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         North Fork's Swampvivor Competition
                                       Turn 16

     Yeeeeee Haaaaaaaaaaaaw!  Welcome to da Swamp.
     Turn 16, and this turn, we were riding on a prediction by Crip that if Carnival
did not succeed in bloodfeuding Jumbo Mumbo, then Carny would be facing serious
penalty points, and in dire risk of elimination from Swampvivor.  Well, as we know,
Jumbo Mumbo staved off the bloodcurdling screams of Threekard yet again, and made his
way to ADM with an impressive 19-1-1 record (Of course that means no WAK award from
Carny, and I've heard Spawn is seriously depressed over that consequence of events).
However, the Mystic Carnival works its magic in wonderful ways, and the stars were
definitely not aligned the way astronomers had predicted.  No it wasn't Carnival with
their unrevenged bloodfeud opportunity that were eliminated from Swampvivor, but
rather Drake's Comics, who contributed two of their own souls to Ahrighol's army who
endured the more trying turn, and are thus eliminated from the Swampvivor
competition.  Spoonertiks look like the odds on favourite, while Royal Flush, Coffee
Rules, and Carnival compete to try and push the spawny Spooners off of the inside
track.
     Swampvivor competition is now down to the fabulous four.

Team updates:

CARNIVAL - 5 points for spotlight.  5 Points for personal ads, 200 bonus points for
team spotlight, 34 points for most avoided, 270 point penalty for unrevenged
bloodfeud.  Total score for turn 16 - ( -29 points)
Bear Keeper - 12 Points for Bashmaster
Threekard - 110 points for challenge
Franc N'Steen - 18 points for challenge
Perfect Parri - 0 points.
Crabbs - 29 points for win, 28 points for up and coming challenger init

COFFEE RULES -5 points for personal ads.  29 points for TOM#4.  Total score for turn
16 - (417 points)
Bombay - 30 points for win, 42 point penalty for least popular
101 Proof! - 60 points for win, 17 points for challenge
Sugar Cube - 0 points
Latte - 30 points for win
100% Columbian - 30 points for win, 21 points for challenge, 219 points for kill, 18
points for popularity leader

DRAKE'S COMICS - 5 points for personal ads, odd thing here, in the tally worksheet, I
have Drake's comics down for 10 points, but no note as for what the 10 points are
for.  I will award the 10 points anyway (Crip note:  10 points for Spaz Ghost's
tourney), - Total score for turn 16, ( -90 points)
Quicksilver - 76 point penalty for getting killed
Juddlenaught - 29 points for win
The Mighty Sore - 60 points for win
Vallet - 24 points for challenge, 133 point penalty for getting killed
Captain Marble - 29 points for win, 38 point penalty for #2 least popular

ROYAL FLUSH - 30 point penalty for biggest avoider, 25 points for long spot, 170
points for various tourney warriors,  5 points for Personal ads, 30 points for TOM
#3,  Total Score for turn 16 -  (709 points)
King Crab - 30 points for win, 15 points for challenge, 70 points for tourney.
Ten O'Chtitlan - 30 points for win, 20 points for challenge
Black Jack Shelack - 51 points for challenge, 30 points for tourney
Ace Bailey - 30 points for win, 34 points for challenge, 93 points for up and coming
champion, 70 points for tourney
Queen of Denial - 36 points for challenge

SPOONERTIKS - 71 points for Top Chartered Team, 5 points for Personal Ads, 5184
points for current top team, 420 points in penalties for tourney performances - Total
score for turn 16 (6213 points)
Mutus Braximus - 0 points
Jumbo Mumbo - 62 points for win, 155 points for DM, 78 points for chartered
recognition leader, 12 points for wastemaster, 27 points for most challenged, 270
points for unrevenged bloodfeud, 25 points for #8 popular, 516 points for graduating.
Ivan Poisy - 30 points for win, 17 points for challenge
Tent in Quarantino - 58 points for win, 106 points for aimmaster
Stroke Broker - 17 points for challenge

SWAMPVIVOR TURN 16 RESULTS (200 point bonuses included in scores)

TEAM Score Bonus
1. SPOONERTIKS (523)       6213
2. ROYAL FLUSH (48)         709
3. COFFEE RULES! (505)      417
4. CARNIVAL (411)           171 "200"
5. DRAKE'S COMICS (463)     -90  ELIMINATED

200 points for best personal ad went to Rondol Quiglo

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

SWAMP JEOPARDY STANDINGS AFTER TURN 16 (bonus points not included)

TEAM      Score Bonus  Last Turn
1.  THE BEAR'S PAW (150)   11413771 "600"  1
2.  SPOONERTIKS (523)         17252        2
3.  MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)    10063 "200"  3
4.  ROYAL FLUSH (48)          7720         4
5.  COFFEE RULES! (505)       7256 "400"   5
6.  CARNIVAL (411)            4184 "1600"  6
7.  DRAKE'S COMICS (463)      3888 "400"   7
8.  SCREEN DREAMS (488)       3636 "600"   8
9.  THE FEDERATION (539)      1118 "200"   9
10. THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    -610 "1000" 10

     No change in the Swamp Jeopardy standings this turn
     Turn 17 has a few things to look out for in Swampvivor.  Spoonertiks seem set to
collect large points if Jumbo Mumbo wins again, and Tent In Quarantino keeps the
title of Aim Blow stylemaster (as long as there is no mad influx of new aim blows.)
so they seem to be relatively safe.  Coffee Rules have a couple of veterans emerging,
perhaps just a little late, to control the challenger champs.  If Mr. Coffee can
control enough challenges in the champions class, he could be sitting pretty to the
end.  Royal Flush seem to have some up & comers at the upper end, but are their
youngsters ready to compete with North Fork's veteran gladiators?  And speaking of
veteran gladiators, Bear Keeper just crossed 50 arena fights.  If he can take the
throne this turn, he will graduate (so too would The Mighty Sore), and those 2 Carny
kills on his record (No WAK for you Bear Keeper) are looming large for graduation
points.
     All these details, and many other mysteries, will be solved based on the results
of this turn.

Crip
MC of the Swampvivor and Swamp Jeopardy Competitions
Mngr of Royal Flush

     >)]H[(< + -----:----- + >)] The Free Cities #71 [(< + -----:----- + >)]H[(<

Riztab:

     "There was something out there," Tillouisa whispered, squinting into the moonlit
distance.  "I SAW it moving across the water."
     "Somebody night-fishing in a rowboat," Song of Summer said in a normal voice.
"Everything isn't monsters, Til."
     "Ha!  That just shows how much YOU know."  Tillouisa abandoned her whisper and
scowled at her teammate triumphantly.  "I've SEEN monsters, Summer.  I know what I'm
talking about.  There are ALWAYS monsters around water--"
     "In the Shagornan Desert, maybe, but--"
     "Everywhere!  Water's tricky, Summer.  You can't TRUST it," the Rirorni woman
stated positively.
     Before Song of Summer could reply to that, a cry floated to them from the dark
lake.  Not a human cry, nor the call of any nightbird that either woman had heard
before.  There was a little of the wolf howling in it, but what wolf would be in the
middle of miles of water?  And even the howl of a wolf did not chill the blood quite
so effectively.
     After a moment, Song of Summer swallowed twice and said, "It might not be a
monster even so."  She didn't sound like she believed that.  "It might be...just some
strange creature out there."
     There was another cry from the lake, this time all too human, shrill with terror
and despair.  Splashes accompanied it.
     "I guess there was a night-fisherman out there, after all," Tillouisa noted.
     "You don't have to sound so cheerful about it!  That poor man probably died
horribly."
     "He would've heard the rumors of monsters same as we did," Tillouisa said,
shrugging.  "If he chose to risk the lake anyway, well, what did he expect?"  She
turned away from the waterfront.
     "I don't suppose there's anything we could do to help him?"
     "I don't suppose so.  He's probably dead by now.  Come on."  Tillouisa grabbed
her teammate's arm and started towing her back up the sloping street.
     "Where are we going?"
     "Around this block of buildings.  They're all collapsed, and we couldn't get
through them.  I want to check out the old records building now while the monster's
out on the lake."
     "Til!  You're INSANE!  We don't know there's only ONE monster."
     "We can find out, then."

Malcorn:

     "It looks like somebody laid a plate, or a shield, or, I dunno, a cartwheel or
something on the field," Blacklock said doubtfully.
     "If plates, shields, or cartwheels came twenty feet across, yes, it surely
does," Birdsong agreed.
     Blacklock moved to study the circle of flattened grain--which was to have been
cut today--from another angle.  Not that there was anything different to see.
Perfectly circular, perfectly flat.  "It'd be hard to cut grain that's been trampled
down like that, wouldn't it?"
     "Yeah, really hard--like impossible, and that's a lot of grain.  It isn't like
we've got so much to spare, you know."  Birdsong knelt and touched the smashed
stalks, drawing her hand back quickly.  "They're frozen!"
     "A twenty-foot cartwheel of ice?" Blacklock speculated doubtfully.  "Well,
anyway, it's too bad, but it happened.  What caused it, and what do we do about it?"
     "I don't know to both, but I think..." Birdsong stood and frowned at the ruined
grain.  "I think we tell Lord Malcorn."
     "Oh, SH-- uh, shoot!  You think he's been dabbling in magic and did this?"
     "Of course not!  Lord Malcorn isn't careless or destructive," Birdsong stated
positively.  "But he'll know what to do."
                       ***     *****     ***     *****     ***
     Lord Malcorn, Blackie in more informal situations, was staring at another circle
of smashed crops.  Hay, this time, and a couple of rabbits who had been so unlucky as
to be inside the circle when disaster fell.  He knew, in a general sense, what had
caused it--when he had loosed the Dregur from the Silent Place, other things had
escaped also.  From the Silent Place, and from other restraints elsewhere.  He didn't
know exactly which "other things" had caused this, but he was sure that the ultimate
blame attached to him.  That was the trouble with taking drastic measures to counter
drastic problems.  You never knew what secondary effects might occur.  Or what kind
of measures would be required to deal with the secondary problems, and what tertiary
problems might arise from THAT.  He could spend the rest of his life cleaning up
after the results of releasing the Dregur....  But then, he could have spent the rest
of his life cleaning up after the invaders, too.
     He sighed and turned to the farmer.  "Keep your livestock and your workers out
of the fields," he directed.  "There may be more of these, and it will require a
complicated bit of work to put a stop to it."

Warriors and managers of the Free Cities, your participation in these events is
invited.  An email to Livia@reality.com or a personal is all it takes. -- the Scribe

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                        ---===FREE BLADES REGIONAL NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 477): GWEN RYDER of DREAM PARK (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 475): CUNNING CALICO of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 471): MAN O' WAR of TRIPLE CROWN (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 471): PERSIFLAGE of SHROUD IN MYSTERY (Noachian, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 469): ASH of DELTA DOOM (Barnabas, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 468): ADARA AL ZAHRA of JAGUAR WARRIORS (Noachian, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 234): TERRIBLE TOTOMAC of IDIOTIC ICCERS (THawk, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 460): BUZZARD of THE TAKEN (Stillgard, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 232): GAELIN BLACKTALON of THE NIGHTHAWKS (Firehawk, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 457): STARBREAKER of CALL THE PRIEST (Destitute Noble, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 455): WILD CARD HAMMER of CASINO HAMMERZ (Hammer, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 448): KING BEAR of THE BEARS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 411): HEMERA AHKISAR of TERMAGANT VOTARY (Noachian, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 209): BINGE N PURGE of EMETICS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 203): JUMBO MUMBO of SPOONERTIKS (Spawn, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 190): MAEGOLOS of DARK SIDHE (Daehir, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 336): ROYCE GRACIE of SADISTS-OCTAGON (SunGod, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 316): ALPHABETIZED AL of PISSED AT WORK (Nuln, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 139): MONGOL HORDE of WORLDWIDE GORE (Crip, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 361): NEMESIS of CHAMPIONS from JHELUM (Shadowgate, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 477): BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 475): ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 471): none
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 471): BLACKHEART'S AXE (?, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 469): SPECIAL ED (PTFT, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 468): NATURE'S WRATH (?, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 234): KESSEN (Iker, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 460): CROC FILES (THawk, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 232): WORDS TO THE WISE (Wordsmith, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 457): DEVIL ADVOCATES (Dark One, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 455): CASINO HAMMERZ (Hammer, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 448): THE BEARS (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 411): MEDS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 209): MIKES MORGUE (Mike, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 203): SPOONERTIKS (Spawn, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 190): MIDDLE WAY 6 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 336): REDHORSE (Mila, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 316): FAVORITE GUYS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 139): DHOOMZDEY (Fizban, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 361): MEOW MIX, etc. (Ultraist, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                  -----------------
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 474): MIKE BELIEVE of POWERPUFF GIRLS (The Narrator, mgr.)
                           EQUALIZER of THE LAWMEN (?, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 469): INBRED FRED of SPECIAL ED (PTFT, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 233): LUCKY LUCIEN of CANADIAN BACON (Firehawk, mgr.)
                          POLARIS of ASTRONOMY DOMINE (Razorback, mgr.)
                          RAPAX of THE PENTARCHY (The Pentalque, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 231): DELWYNNDWN of THE NIGHTHAWKS (Firehawk, mgr.)
                               GILGAMESH of THE STORMBRINGERS (High Lord Bosk, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 411): HEMERA AHKISAR of TERMAGANT VOTARY (Noachian, mgr.)
                 (turn 410): SUNGOD DESIGNED ME of WENSINWASIN (Youngblood, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 208): IPECAC of EMETICS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 203): JUMBO MUMBO of SPOONERTIKS (Spawn, mgr.)
                   (turn 202): THREEKARD of CARNIVAL (Carny, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 189): MR. HOOPER of OPEN SESAME (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 335): DUMPLING of BAD APPLES (Uncle Wolf, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 139): SUNGLASSES of FOUND IN THE SAND (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
                (turn 138): I.O.U. of ALPHABET SOUP (Crip, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

Greetings, Forkers!!

Well, as expected my one way ticket to the Isle has arrived and so I'm off into
retirement, at least for now....

The boss has promised a fitting epitaph for my leaving, prompted by two (yes, twice
one!) diplomatic notes received in the same envelope last month...hand written notes
too...wonderful...truly the best (if slowest) form of communication available in this
world!!  I promise to return those treats very soon....

Anyway, a little about me.  I am, despite my record, quite unremarkable in most ways.
I was the boss' fourth favorite raw recruit on the 'team sheet'...though it was
admittedly a fantastic sheet!  Solid but unspectacular, he thought.  Well, I fought
hard, challenged hard and avoided wisely to gain the (even if I say it myself!)
spectacular record of 19-1-1 at graduation.  I'm not a tourney monster either, just
the three entered, all returning solid (but unspectacular!) performances for a total
of 13 additional FE.  I have learnt *very* well.  70 skills and 2 stat raises in 33
FE.  Rude really when you consider I'm a 15 Wit/17 Will creation!!  (See, I said I
was unspectacular!)

More about my design, set up and strategy ethos another time maybe.

It has certainly been great fun for me here.  Wildly exceeding any and all
expectations.  My fave's are also 'above average' mod/mod rhythm, quarterstaff and
learns decise (I have an Ad Ex that I never use!).

Au Revoir, Forkers!

Jumbo Mumbo.

P.S.  My only worry is who will now look after you now your fave mumbo is leaving
you??

_________________________________________________________________
It's fast, it's easy and it's free. Get MSN Messenger today!
http://www.msn.co.uk/messenger

                                      SPY REPORT

     Ready for some action-packed adventure, some thrills, chills and spills?  Well 
fergit it, cause this is the Spyreport for NORTH FORK.  Like, SPOONERTIKS had to be 
so embarrassed when they got kicked off #1 spot by COFFEE RULES!!  Way to go COFFEE 
RULES!!  DREWS CREW like really fought hard to move up to 6th from 12th.  Way to go!  
One team deserves special mention 'cause they moved up 4 after going 4-1-0.  Keep it 
up, LAND OF OZ!  MVP award for UR BRAIN ON EGG?  MYSTIC ORC FEAST's proud of him 
after beating JEM KATOREH and getting 31 points.  Talk about yer big time losers!  
QUEEN OF DENIAL got smashed by KIRA NERYS, and lost 19 points!  Was that a tear I saw 
in 101 PROOF!!'s eye, as he took over Duelmastership?  And wasn't JUMBO MUMBO fit to 
be tied!  Is the Duelmaster really being a real snob to his teammates?  Don't ask me! 
     AAARRGH!!!  I HATE SPYREPORTING!!!  Sorry.  I just had to say it.  CARNIVAL was 
NORTH FORK's most avoided team.  Is there some award for that?  Hhmph!  What kind of 
warriors are MYSTIC ORC FEAST?  CARNIVAL, an easy team to beat if I ever saw one, 
can't get them to accept an invitation!  Can THE BEAR'S PAW's HONEY BEAR be more 
popular than me?  He was challenged the most, but is that really the same?  I'm not 
so sure BEARNAISE knew all the facts when he challenged WOLVERINE of FANTASTIC FIVE.  
I saw BEARNAISE stumbling and dribbling at The Welcome Wench last week...  Like, was 
that some fighting on BEARNAISE's part, or what?  And he got 26 points out of it!  
(besides getting in my report)  Poor WOLVERINE.  For sure, I was holding my breath 
when I found out STRAW FIRE challenged TENT IN QUARANTINO.  After all, haven't LAND 
OF OZ and SPOONERTIKS had a long standing duel in NORTH FORK?  It wasn't a 
spectacular fight, or anything, but TENT IN QUARANTINO wants me to write about it 
since it was overcame by STRAW FIRE.  Satisfied?  LEVIATHAN OF LARD must not be a 
good enough fighter to get in fair fights.  He challenged CARNAGE.  10 is a big 
difference.  (Well, that's what they tell me.) I thought LEVIATHAN OF LARD showed 
great skill and promise when he overcame CARNAGE.  All right, so I slept through it!  
Big deal!   
     What does a fighter fight for?  I mean, the crowds don't give a hoot if someone 
gets killed.  Not after four more fights.  I hear THE FEDERATION sent JADZIA-DAX to 
the Dark Arena.  What, is that like not well-lit, or what?  It was kind of sad, 
seeing old JEM KATOREH stumbling around the arena, before UR BRAIN ON EGG finished 
him off.  Oh well!  THE MIGHTY SORE bloodfeuded (is that a word?) LARA CROFT for 
revenge over some guy's bad fortune.  Was it really worth it?  CAPTAIN MARBLE really 
fought hard against ARSENIC.  That'll teach PURE POISON not to go and kill any of 
DRAKE'S COMICS' guys again, huh!  Like was that some Bloodfeud, or what?  (NEER BEAR 
vs. MUTUS BRAXIMUS, that is.) Fight, fight, fight.  Is that all you guys can do?   
     Remember, blood on a purple robe may stain.  Soak it in cold water, and hand 
wash.  I know how much you like reading this stuff, but I really should stop.  Its 
been really albendranius!  Later, guys-- Debby Tonte  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 101 PROOF!! 4495             17  12  0   116       COFFEE RULES! (505)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 THE MIGHTY SORE 4490         17  10  0   139       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
 HONEY BEAR 3032              19  14  0   114       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 UR BRAIN ON EGG 4703         12   8  1   110       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 STRAW FIRE 4350              12   7  0   107       LAND OF OZ (217)
 SUGAR CUBE 4617              15  10  0   100       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 CUP OF CAT 4926              11   5  0    99       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 BEAR KEEPER 3782             21  30  2    95       CARNIVAL (411)
 BLACK JACK SHELACK 4850      11   8  0    91       ROYAL FLUSH (48)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FOLMOR GRIGG 4501            16  24  0    90       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 ONE HIT WONDER 4680          16   6  0    89       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 100% COLUMBIAN 4874          11   6  2    88       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 TENT IN QUARANTINO 4816      16   4  0    87       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 KIRA NERYS 4941               8   4  1    82       THE FEDERATION (539)
 ACE BAILEY 4948               7   7  0    76       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 FRANC N' STEEN 4649          16   6  0    74       CARNIVAL (411)
 SPAWN 4283                    6   6  0    73       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
 SEKA 4612                    11  13  0    68       SCREEN DREAMS (488)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-ASOKA 2922                   10   7  0    66       THE 7TH ORDER (294)
 LATTE 4667                   15   8  0    65       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 BELANNA TORRES 4898           8   9  0    64       THE FEDERATION (539)
 QUEEN OF DENIAL 4896          8   9  0    63       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 DEEP FRIED LARD 4975         10   1  0    61       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 BEAR ACUDA 4995               5   3  0    60       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 CAPTAIN MARBLE 4634          12  11  0    59       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 RAINBOW 4553                  6   7  0    56       LAND OF OZ (217)
 LARA CROFT 4980               6   4  1    53       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 INCREDIBLE HULK 4280          8   4  0    52       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
 BEARFOOT 4875                 9   9  0    51       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 COURAGE 4552                  7   5  1    50       LAND OF OZ (217)
-SAMMEL 2952                  12   6  3    49       THE 7TH ORDER (294)
-TARRANT 3012                  8   7  2    45       THE 7TH ORDER (294)
 ARSENIC 4285                  4   7  1    45       PURE POISON (478)
 NEDDIE OGIL 4663             10  14  0    44       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 CRABBS 5093                   4   0  0    42       CARNIVAL (411)
 KING CRAB 4983                5   5  0    41       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 AXE 4551                      7   5  0    38       LAND OF OZ (217)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SEVEN OF NINE 4940            7   5  0    33       THE FEDERATION (539)
 PERFECT PARRI 4967            5   8  0    33       CARNIVAL (411)
 BOMBAY 5043                   5   1  0    33       COFFEE RULES! (505)
-DELARUE 5091                  2   0  0    33       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
 BEARNAISE 5114                1   2  0    28       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 RONDOL QUIGLO 4978            3   8  0    27       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 STROKE BROKER 5094            3   1  0    25       SPOONERTIKS (523)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HENBANE 4289                  4   7  0    23       PURE POISON (478)
 NEER BEAR 5073                2   0  0    23       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
 STRYCHNINE 4838               6   4  0    22       PURE POISON (478)
 CYANIDE 4286                  2   9  1    21       PURE POISON (478)
 MASS STUPIDITY 5068           4   0  0    20       MY DAY (557)
 DABO GIRL 5023                3   3  0    20       THE FEDERATION (539)
 FRUSTRATION 5067              3   1  0    20       MY DAY (557)
 WOLVERINE 4279                3   9  1    19       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
 KATE 4992                     3   1  0    18       DREWS CREW (546)
 LEVIATHAN OF LARD 5113        2   1  0    18       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
-JEAN-LUC DELPECH 5089         2   0  0    17       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
-RENAUD DION 5088              1   1  0    17       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
 BUFFY 5086                    2   2  0    16       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 OSWALD 4991                   2   2  0    15       DREWS CREW (546)
 STINGRAY HAMMER 5064          2   1  0    15       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 THE THING 4927                3   5  0    14       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
 DREW 4993                     2   2  0    14       DREWS CREW (546)
 NETTLES 5131                  1   0  0    13       CARNIVAL (411)
 BEAR NEKKID 5126              2   0  0    12       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 WARLOCK 4837                  1   9  0    12       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
 IVAN POISY 5112               2   1  0    11       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 HOURGLASS 5127                1   0  0    11       LAND OF OZ (217)
 CARNAGE 5069                  1   3  0    10       MY DAY (557)
 MUTUS BRAXIMUS 5095           2   2  1     9       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 SAMANTHA THE WITCH 5128       1   0  0     9       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 HAWKEYE HAMMER 5061           0   3  0     9       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 LEWIS 4989                    2   2  0     8       DREWS CREW (546)
 IRON MAN HAMMER 5063          1   2  0     7       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 GOLIATH HAMMER 5060           1   2  0     7       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 BLOW POP 5109                 0   1  0     7       SWEET DESIRES (563)
 GOOD & PLENTY 5105            1   0  0     6       SWEET DESIRES (563)
 MIMI 4990                     1   3  0     6       DREWS CREW (546)
 MAYHEM 5066                   0   4  0     6       MY DAY (557)
 JUICY FRUIT 5107              0   1  0     3       SWEET DESIRES (563)
 PANTHER HAMMER 5062           0   3  0     3       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 SLOW POKE 5106                0   1  0     3       SWEET DESIRES (563)
 BIT O HONEY 5108              0   1  0     3       SWEET DESIRES (563)
-RONY MARTIAS 5090             0   2  0     2       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
 MUDDY BLARIE 5071             0   1  0     1       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
 FORBES BUSHMAN 5130           0   1  0     1       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
VALLET 4963            6  6 0 DRAKE'S COMICS 463    LARA CROFT 4980       203 JUST REV
QUICKSILVER 5029       3  2 0 DRAKE'S COMICS 463    ARSENIC 4285          203 JUST REV
JADZIA-DAX 4900        6 11 0 THE FEDERATION 539    SPYMASTER 22          204 NONE    
BROOMSTICK 4474        8  8 0 LAND OF OZ 217        100% COLUMBIAN 4874   203         
JEM KATOREH 4499      18 22 1 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 506  UR BRAIN ON EGG 4703  204         
NUZZLY FLAVA 5075      0  1 0 MIXED-UP MIXERS 558   MUTUS BRAXIMUS 5095   202 JUST REV
OPIUM 4287             5  5 0 PURE POISON 478       WOLVERINE 4279        203         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

All -- Welcome to the upcoming Third Annual Turf War!  I *am* "here" to record
declarations (yes, I've noted yours, Abraxis) so you can declare freely now--though
I've only received the entry donation from Abraxis and declarations won't be
*officially* recorded until I get a roll-up cert from the manager declaring.  Bloody
sands. -- Asmo Dius -- TCB

Asmo -- How about confirmation that you got my $5.00 cert as a rollup. -- Abraxis

All -- Kate will be my champion in the Turf War!  I have spoken, so mote it be! --
Abraxis, mgr. Drews Crew

Kat -- I accept your leadership for the Turf War! -- Abraxis

Hammer -- Welcome to North Fork.  I guess we split last turn. -- Abraxis

Drake -- Sorry about the loss but you have only yourself to blame by picking on the
Tomb Raider.  She'll fight at least one more turn before resting for the Turf War.
After that we'll see.  Probably depends on the dead tourney. -- Fizban

Mr Coffee -- Way to represent, brother.  Will fly a kite soon.  See you in the Turf
War.  We placed second in the Turf War II and believe it or not I pulled in more
points than any other manager.  Who'd have thought it. -- Fizban

Oz -- Don't know if I said so or not but if not, welcome back.  Always good to see
Consortium teams around.  You were missed. -- Fizban

Oswald -- Thank you, sweetie, for all those wonderful skills.  The win was nice too.
-- Buffy

The Land of Oz welcomes Hourglass, a lovely lady not at all shaped like Broomstick
whom she replaces, our newest recruit.  Please give her your full attention. -- Oz,
The All-Praising

My, oh my, Coffee Rules!  Did they have to end poor Broomstick's days?  She was a
fun-loving 9-10-12-17-21-10-5 warrior.  She will be missed. -- Oz, The All-Mourning
P.S.  On YOUR challenge?  How sad.

Mr. Bailey -- I must admit that you aced me.  You may be royal, but you should be
flushed down the sewage!  So, there! -- Straw Fire

Kira -- Turnabout is fair play.  Well challenged and well executed. -- Courage

Stroker Broker -- It must have been my day.  Life is sweet! -- Axe

Sammel -- You were my pot of gold.  "Somewhere, over the..." -- Rainbow, Way Up High

Congratulations to Jumbo Mumbo, a Lord Protector who can fight in The Mailer as an
immortal champion well deserved. -- Oz The All-Praising (and Covetous)

Ah, Dr. Mabuse -- I understood your intelligent words.  "Aruak City which currently
has more scum than this here swamp."  I presumed you were using scum and
Frothingslosher as synonyms. -- Oz The Well-Educated

King Crab -- The point end of Broomstick is six feet under in the local graveyard. --
Oz The All-Sorrowful

Mr Coffee -- I don't have any bags of coffee with which to pay, but I do have one
well-used limp broomstick. -- Oz The Great And Wonderful

Drake -- You are slicker than a spymaster!  Information galore! -- Oz The All-In-Awe

Slugbait -- Have you been partying at any zoos lately? -- Oz The All-Knowing

Mr. Mighty Sore -- If you are going to keep insisting on 'The' counting as a word,
then I insist, by the rules of Warner Brothers cartoon enterprises, that you be
banished from this place to a desolate isle. -- Black Jack Shellack

Slugbait -- It is actually a very rare occasion that I challenge either of the
Consortium Orcs, but rather, I will lie in waiting, trying the occasional water
balloon assault from afar. -- Crip

Ur Brain -- I consider the Medium Shield as the closest thing to a Cast Iron Skillet.
If you were to use it for the rest of your dueling career, I wouldn't dare consider
lodging an official complaint with the commission. -- Black Jack Shellack

Straw Fire -- I've been burnt many times before.  Now I feel I won't be prepared for
what's to come. -- Ace Bailey

Cup of Cat -- Didn't think you would be so runny. -- Queen of Denial

Bearfoot -- I don't think I want to do that again. -- King Crab

Neddie Ogil -- Quit ogling the girls. -- Ten O'Chtitlan

Deep Fried Lard -- Belanna is a connoisseur of bloodwine and loves fatty foods, grub
worms in particular.  Congratulations on the 9-0 and thanks for that parry skill.  It
may come in handy one day. -- 31

Perfect Parri -- Your designation is now tertiary adjunct JDM-61463.  Your quest of
perfection has been hastened by your assimilation.  You too will now serve The Borg.
-- Seven of Nine

Frank N Steen -- After DNA testing, the brain maker matched that of Captain Marble.
Please excuse the mix-up. -- Section 31 Operative

Crip (& all) -- Ok, before I call out the, "I was robbed!" police, I'll just say that
it was an interesting contest.  Besides, I'd have to eventually bow out to keep from
looking greedy!   Seven points though?  Ouch. -- The Calico of Cool, Kat

Jumbo Mumbo -- Congrats on your invite.  Honey finally got in position to give you
loss #2, and you decide bigger and better things await.  Represent us well! -- The
Congratulatory Kitty, Kat

All -- Due to an oppressing lack of time, I'm only sending one warrior from the 'Paw
to the tourney.  Hopefully Bear Acuda sees his way to a winning record. -- Kat

Latte -- Great fight and kudos to you, though you teach like crap. -- Kat

Near Beer -- You're making Bearnaise look like blood-Flownaise. -- Kat

Threekard -- Rough justice that, especially if you drop out of the Crip's contest as
a result.  Even I think you deserved to win!  Unlucky. -- Jumbo M

Sugar Cube -- I've been trying to taste a chunk of your sweet self for a while now.
All the waiting only made the result even more appetizing, thank you! -- Tent IQ

Axe -- I had thought one of your experience would be sure to teach better than
average.  Obviously, unlike the keen edge on your blade, you're not a sharp teacher!
-- Stroke B

Mimi -- My my...that was all you you! -- Mutus Braximus

Dabo Girl -- If you taste me, I will overcome you! -- Ivan Poisy

Dr. Mabuse -- Welcome back.  Sorry about the 'distinctive smell'.  I've been trying
to convince Carny that he needs to hose down the cages more than once every other
month. -- Drake
P.S.  Glad you enjoyed the review.  Only about 9 months or so until the next one.

Crip & Spawn -- Yeah, but then you'd have someone with a 6-7-0 record outranking
someone with a 5-0 record.  That hardly seems appropriate either. -- Drake

Black Jack Shellack -- You're just jealous because I'm a better 3-word name warrior
than you are. -- TMS
P.S.  Been feeling gluttonous for that punishment?

Spawn -- Nope, never did burn to a 21 STR.  The only reason I'd put it at 20 was in
case he'd gotten hosed on his damage roll.  Since I felt he did plenty of damage
(once I got the overview), I left it alone. -- Drake

Lara Croft & Arsenic -- Four turns and counting. -- Drake

Captured Orc -- That'll teach you to get captured. -- Cpt. Marble

Carnage -- Man, you're quick.  It's a good thing I'm the robust individual that I am.
-- Jugglenought

Frank N' Steen -- Another scar or two for your collection. -- Jem Katoreh

Ur Brain On Egg -- Is that Gaelic or something? -- Folmor Grigg

Ten O'Chittlan -- I like chittlins, but not ten at once.  Too greasy. -- Neddie Ogil

Mayhem -- But it's not May. -- Rondol Quiglo

Queen of Denial -- The possibility of you doing what I say for ANY reason so dazzles
me that I can't think of anything to say....  No, wait.  How about, "Come here,
wench"? -- Folmor Grigg
P.S.  Simon says, though what HE has to do with anything I can't imagine.

Queen of Denial -- Yep, and I'm counting on that to keep me alive.  When I think of
how many great teachers I've seen killed by their best students, well, it just makes
me shake in my boots.  Unless we're having an earthquake. -- Jem Katoreh

Mr. Coffee -- I'm a basher myself.  My weapon works just as well either way. -- Jorja

Cup of Cat -- No you do NOT go down smoothly.  You go down with your claws out, and
your tail tickling my tonsils, and just generally rough and gnarly. -- Jem
P.S.  Assuming you're the Cup I was talking to.  I wouldn't swear to it (Jorja
doesn't like it when we swear)

31 October 2003
     Come one, come all, to the greatest contest in Alastari!  The Third Annual Turf
War will be in North Fork (DM 47) starting in about 6-7 turns....  C'mon and get your
team some experience, and get declared!
     More info available in North Fork's newsletter.
     Bloody Sands. -- Asmo Dius, TCB

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

JADZIA-DAX was butchered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
THE MIGHTY SORE devastated LARA CROFT in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud duel.
CAPTAIN MARBLE defeated ARSENIC in a crowd pleasing 3 minute Bloodfeud duel.
RAINBOW was viciously subdued by 100% COLUMBIAN in a 4 minute Bloodfeud fight.
NEER BEAR devastated MUTUS BRAXIMUS in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud duel.
HONEY BEAR unbelievably bested CUP OF CAT in a 3 minute master's Challenge match.
BEAR KEEPER was defeated by SUGAR CUBE in a 2 minute expert's Challenge melee.
SEKA was vanquished by ONE HIT WONDER in a 3 minute uneven Challenge fight.
STRAW FIRE viciously subdued TENT IN QUARANTINO in a 3 minute Challenge fight.
UR BRAIN ON EGG executed JEM KATOREH in a 1 minute brutal one-sided Challenge fight.
KIRA NERYS devastated QUEEN OF DENIAL in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge conflict.
BEARFOOT subdued NEDDIE OGIL in a crowd pleasing 3 minute gory Challenge match.
CRABBS handily defeated CYANIDE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge conflict.
BOMBAY was viciously subdued by BEAR ACUDA in a action packed 3 minute Challenge duel.
HENBANE was devastated by AXE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
MASS STUPIDITY savagely defeated LEWIS in a 4 minute brutal Challenge bout.
LEVIATHAN OF LARD luckily beat CARNAGE in a 2 minute brutal Challenge bout.
DABO GIRL defeated IVAN POISY in a 2 minute Challenge conflict.
THE THING was devastated by RONDOL QUIGLO in a 3 minute one-sided Challenge contest.
STRYCHNINE was demolished by PERFECT PARRI in a 1 minute uneven Challenge bout.
STROKE BROKER vanquished MIMI in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fray.
BEARNAISE overpowered WOLVERINE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
JUMBO MUMBO was narrowly defeated by 101 PROOF!! in a 3 minute veteran's Title duel.
ACE BAILEY was savagely defeated by FOLMOR GRIGG in a 4 minute veteran's bout.
BLACK JACK SHELACK viciously subdued KHALHUMS DWARF in a 2 minute veteran's fray.
BELANNA TORRES was narrowly defeated by SPAWN in a action packed 4 minute competition.
LATTE was savagely defeated by FRANC N' STEEN in a 11 minute gruesome veteran's fight.
KING CRAB was handily defeated by DEEP FRIED LARD in a 9 minute one-sided fight.
COURAGE overpowered FRATSFA SLAVE in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
INCREDIBLE HULK beat SEVEN OF NINE in a 2 minute gruesome bout.
BUFFY narrowly defeated WARLOCK in a 3 minute contest.
FRUSTRATION outwaited HAWKEYE HAMMER in a unpopular 13 minute fight.
GOLIATH HAMMER savagely defeated FORBES BUSHMAN in a 1 minute amateur's match.
PANTHER HAMMER was overpowered by OSWALD in a 1 minute one-sided match.
IRON MAN HAMMER was overcome by NETTLES in a 2 minute beginner's match.
STINGRAY HAMMER beat PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 2 minute beginner's bout.
MAYHEM was overpowered by DREW in a 1 minute one-sided competition.
KATE handily defeated BIT O HONEY in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
BEAR NEKKID defeated SLOW POKE in a 2 minute beginner's battle.
BLOW POP was unbelievably bested by HOURGLASS in a 4 minute novice's struggle.
JUICY FRUIT slimly lost to SAMANTHA THE WITCH in a 5 minute novice's conflict.
GOOD & PLENTY slimly won victory over MUDDY BLARIE in a 2 minute amateur's match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  15         WALL OF STEEL     66 -  39 -  1      63  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   13         TOTAL PARRY       53 -  41 -  0      56  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  11         STRIKING ATTACK   58 -  46 -  4      56  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     10         PARRY-LUNGE       16 -  14 -  4      53  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                  9         LUNGING ATTACK    82 -  76 -  4      52  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  6         AIMED BLOW        21 -  24 -  0      47  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    5         SLASHING ATTACK   18 -  23 -  0      44  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      4         BASHING ATTACK    42 -  58 -  3      42  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     4         PARRY-RIPOSTE      7 -  14 -  1      33  |
|AIMED BLOW                       3         PARRY-STRIKE       5 -  18 -  0      22  |

Turn 204 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

TOTAL PARRY        7 -  3     LUNGING ATTACK     7 -  8         4  LUNGING ATTACK 
STRIKING ATTACK    5 -  4     PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  3         3  WALL OF STEEL  
BASHING ATTACK     6 -  5     AIMED BLOW         1 -  2         2  TOTAL PARRY    
WALL OF STEEL      7 -  6     SLASHING ATTACK    2 -  4         1  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  2                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  2     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    101 PROOF!! 4495           17  12  0  116 COFFEE RULES! (505)
TOTAL PARRY      HONEY BEAR 3032            19  14  0  114 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
STRIKING ATTACK  UR BRAIN ON EGG 4703       12   8  1  110 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
LUNGING ATTACK   STRAW FIRE 4350            12   7  0  107 LAND OF OZ (217)
AIMED BLOW       TENT IN QUARANTINO 4816    16   4  0   87 SPOONERTIKS (523)
PARRY-LUNGE      BEAR ACUDA 4995             5   3  0   60 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
SLASHING ATTACK  COURAGE 4552                7   5  1   50 LAND OF OZ (217)
BASHING ATTACK   AXE 4551                    7   5  0   38 LAND OF OZ (217)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is 100% COLUMBIAN 4874.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was 100% COLUMBIAN 4874.  The ten other most popular fighters were STRAW FIRE 
4350, CUP OF CAT 4926, BEAR ACUDA 4995, BELANNA TORRES 4898, FOLMOR GRIGG 4501, 
BEARFOOT 4875, BLOW POP 5109, ARSENIC 4285, BEAR KEEPER 3782, and RONDOL QUIGLO 4978.

The least popular fighter this week was KING CRAB 4983.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were FRUSTRATION 5067, DEEP FRIED LARD 4975, HAWKEYE HAMMER 5061, FRANC N' 
STEEN 4649, SAMANTHA THE WITCH 5128, BIT O HONEY 5108, PANTHER HAMMER 5062, WOLVERINE 
4279, MIMI 4990, and STRYCHNINE 4838.

The following warriors will travel to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after next turn:

BEAR KEEPER (47-3782) CARNIVAL (411)

The following warriors have traveled to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after fighting this turn:

JUMBO MUMBO (47-4714) SPOONERTIKS (523)

                       TOURNEY FREEZE CHANGE -- ADVANCE NOTICE

     Beginning at the Winter Face-to-Face in Tempe (January 2004), we will implement 
several changes affecting tournaments.  The tournament announcement for the upcoming 
FTF and future tourneys will reflect these changes.
     First, we will eliminate the tourney freeze for all regular DM warrior classes.  
Regular DM warriors will not be classed ahead of the tournament, but instead will 
fight according to their FE on the date of the tourney.  There will still be a freeze 
for the ADM classes, occurring on the same timeline as before, approximately 6 weeks 
before the tournament.
     In addition to the above change, the warrior classes will be slightly altered.  
The new tourney classes will be as follows:

                DM Tourney Classes                 ADM Tourney Classes
              ======================              ======================
                  0 FE:  Rookies                        Freshmen
                1-4 FE:  Apprentices                    ADM
               5-10 FE:  Initiates                      Eligibles
              11-20 FE:  Adepts                      ---induction---
              21-30 FE:  Champions                      Contenders
                31+ FE:  Challengers                    Primus

     All regular DM tourney classes will remain solely FE based.  All ADM classes will 
now be based on warrior characteristics (i.e., the ADM split algorithm), including the 
Freshmen class.
     The Gateway and Primus arenas will be merging before the FTF to form one top 
arena.  These warriors will be split into two tournament classes, the Contenders and 
the Primus classes, again based upon their characteristics.  More information on this 
will be published in the newsletters for those arenas.
     If you have any questions about the above changes, please contact Customer 
Service.  Good luck in your games.

                                          -- Green Eyes and the RSI staff