Date   : 12/30/2003    Duedate: 01/26/2004


DM-47    TURN-206

This Weeks Top Honors


LAND OF OZ (217)
(47-4350) [14-7-0,134]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

STRAW FIRE                     FRUSTRATION
LAND OF OZ (217)               MY DAY (557)
(47-4350) [14-7-0,134]         (47-5067) [5-1-0,38]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

100% COLUMBIAN                 101 PROOF!!
COFFEE RULES! (505)            COFFEE RULES! (505)
(47-4874) [12-7-2,108]         (47-4495) [17-14-0,98]


LAND OF OZ (217)

Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. CARNIVAL (411)              55
2. SPOONERTIKS (523)           42      SPOONERTIKS (523)
3. MY DAY (557)                38      Unchartered Team
4. THE JESUITS (524)           37
5. THE FEDERATION (539)        37      KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)      1   0  0  100   1/ 2 LAND OF OZ (217)         10  4 1
 2/ 1 SPOONERTIKS (523)         74  35  5 67.9   2/ 1 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   10  5 1
 3/ 2 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   215 122 17 63.8   3/ 4 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)     10  5 0
 4/ 6*MY DAY (557)              17  10  0 63.0   4/ 7*MY DAY (557)              9  3 0
 5/ 3 LAND OF OZ (217)         375 262 12 58.9   5/11 CARNIVAL (411)            9  6 0
 6/ 4 DRAKE'S COMICS (463)     127  96  4 57.0   6/ 9 SPOONERTIKS (523)         7  7 1
 7/ 7 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         545 427 29 56.1   7/ 8 ROYAL FLUSH (48)          7  7 0
 8/ 5 COFFEE RULES! (505)       84  66  3 56.0   8/ 6 THE FEDERATION (539)      7  8 0
 9/ 8*BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)  10   8  0 55.6   9/ 5 DRAKE'S COMICS (463)      6  5 0
10/ 9 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)     266 244 26 52.2  10/14 FANTASTIC FIVE (477)      6  9 1
11-10*DREWS CREW (546)          10  10  0 50.0  11/ 3 COFFEE RULES! (505)       6  9 0
12/12 CARNIVAL (411)           139 141  7 49.6  12/20 THE JESUITS (524)         5  5 1
13/13 THE FEDERATION (539)      44  48  1 47.8  13/10 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    4  8 0
14/17 THE JESUITS (524)         38  54  8 41.3  14-12*DREWS CREW (546)          3  2 0
15-14 SCREEN DREAMS (488)       56  81  5 40.9  15/19*BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)  3  5 0
16/15 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    79 120  2 39.7  16-15 SCREEN DREAMS (488)       2  2 0
17/18 PURE POISON (478)         23  39  2 37.1  17-16*AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)     2  3 0
18/19 FANTASTIC FIVE (477)      25  44  2 36.2  18/13 PURE POISON (478)         2 10 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/11*MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)      2   5  0 28.6  19/ 0*KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)     1  0 0
20-20*AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)      4  11  0 26.7  20/17*MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)     1  4 0
21/21*EXALTED PATH (565)         0   6  0  0.0  21/21*EXALTED PATH (565)        0  6 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

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 *          *          *         *  TURF WAR III (Preview)  *          *          *

     Here's the declarations so far, folks:

Vendetta Cartel (Strongarm Senate Branch)
     Leader -- Abraxis/Drews Crew, Kate
          Dr. Mabuse/Bordeaux Saintes, No Champ

     Kinda slack, and as of turn 205 I had no rollup cert from Dr. Mabuse, but
Abraxis is free + clear.
     I've received rollup certs for The Bear's Paw and Mixed-Up Mixers...though no
declarations for either of them.  Rumor has Kat declaring as leader of the Vendetta
Cartel though.

                                             Bloody Sands,
                                                       Asmo Dius, TCB

P.S.  More details on the rules next turn!

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                         North Fork's Swampvivor Competition
                                       Turn 18

     Yeeeeee Haaaaaaaaaaaaw!  Welcome to da Swamp.
     Ye ole Flush may be gone from the competition, but the show must go on.  This
turn, we are down to 3 teams remaining in the competition so the rivalries were
expected to be fierce, however, fans were grossly disappointed, as there was not a
single duel between the remaining Swampvivor teams.  So who would survive for next
turns final showing?  For the Spoonertiks, Mutus Braximus, Ivan Poisy and Stroke
Broker all collected wins, however, Jumbo Mumbo's replacement failed to show.  Over
in the Coffeehouse, only Bombay and Latte managed to keep the patrons awake, while
under the Big Tent, Franc N'Steen was the only Carny who wanted the show to go on.
Well, in one of the biggest surprises of the Swampvivor contest, Carny's 1-4 turn
lets them move on, thanks largely to the 200 point bonus for having written the only
spotlight of the turn, leaving Mr. Coffee and Spawn to fight for the remaining
position.  And in this case, it was the Coffee Maker that came out ahead with a 55
point margin of safety, largely due to a mad influx of Aim blows to the arena, which
actually cost Tent In Quarantino about 60 stylemaster points.
     So now, for Turn 19, it will be all up to Carny and Coffee Rules.  The wise
money is on Coffee Rules, as 100% Columbian will be picking up points, not only as
the likely overall popularity leader, but likely also for garnering a TV on all
hallow's eve.

Team updates:

CARNIVAL - 38 point penalty for biggest avoider, 5 points for short spotlight, 5
points for personal ads, 200 point bonus for best spotlight.
Total score for turn 18 - (148+200 = 348 points)
Bear Keeper - 0 points
Nettles - 0 points
Franc N'Steen - 38 points for win, 30 points for challenge
Perfect Parri - 0 points
Crabbs - 39 points for up and coming adept, 69 points for #4 pop.

COFFEE RULES - 5 points for personal ads.  Total score for turn 18 - (235 points)
Bombay - 38 points for win, 23 point penalty for #2 least populat
101 Proof! - 0 points
Sugar Cube - 53 points for challenge
Latte - 38 points for win
100% Columbian - 15 points for challenge, 20 points for popularity leader, 89 points
for #2 most popular

SPOONERTIKS - 68 points for Top Chartered Team, 5 points for Personal Ads - Total
score for turn 18 (180 points)
Mutus Braximus - 32 points for win
Jumbo Mumbo's Replacement - 0 points.
Ivan Poisy - 32 points for win
Tent in Quarantino - 5 points for aimmaster
Stroke Broker - 38 points for win

SWAMPVIVOR TURN 18 RESULTS (200 point bonuses included in scores)

TEAM Score Bonus
1. CARNIVAL (411)       348 "200"
2. COFFEE RULES! (505)  235
3. SPOONERTIKS (523)    180         ELIMINATED

200 points for best personal ad went to Dr. Mabuse for his scummy frothingsloshers.

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         SWAMP JEOPARDY STANDINGS AFTER TURN 18 (bonus points not included)

TEAM     Score Bonus  Last Turn
 New Total  Previous Rankings
1.  THE BEAR'S PAW (150) 11414552 "600"  1
2.  SPOONERTIKS (523)       17667        2
3.  CARNIVAL (411)          14029 "1800" 3
4.  MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)  11674 "200"  4
5.  COFFEE RULES! (505)      8488 "800"  5
6.  ROYAL FLUSH (48)         8077        6
7.  DRAKE'S COMICS (463)     4968 "400"  7
8.  SCREEN DREAMS (488)      2723 "600"  8
9.  THE FEDERATION (539)     1354 "200"  9
10. THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)  -816 "1000" 10

     No moves in Swamp Jeopardy for the turn.
     Who will now win the swampvivor.  Can Coffee Rules ride 100% Columbian to the
throne, and possibly get an invite to accumulate lots of points and a toast on the
throne.  Will Carny write more entertaining gibberish to claim plenty of bonus
     Stayed tuned to the results of this turn, or possibly read on for another
spotlight if the commision can slip Crip some scouting info ahead of time.

MC of the Swampvivor and Swamp Jeopardy Competitions
Mngr of Royal Flush

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                                SWAMPVIVOR, CARNIVAL

     Yes, it is I the UMBRELLA MAN, bringing you tips and advice from the great
THREEKARD who left here for the Isle and is on a rampage with his streak intact.  I
present to you THREEKARD with his strategy for winning.  Taking notes is advised...

     Thank you.  All in Swampvivor, do not attempt to understand petty details such
as 11 million plus points.  You will only be confused....  The beginner's strategy
after three cards.  Trap or not?  Yes, to trap or not to trap--that is the eternal
question.  By trapping, I mean to call your best opponent's bets and raises with what
you deem is a powerful hand to allow weaker hands to continue.  Jamming with 3, 4, 5
against pocket kings and clearing the field has made it easier for kings to call me
down, and it's hard to scoop kings with 3, 4, 5!!  And jamming with 3, 4, 5 against
A, #6, does not work well either.  It boils down to this:  trapping with powerful low
hands will allow you to lose less when you catch bad and win more when you hit good
ones.  The downside is you will win fewer right away.  Now, when you have a good
high-type like K, K, x.  You should jam it, in order to clear out the weak hands.
With high hands you just want to win, period.  If you have K, 7, K and several have
already called the bring-in then don't bother jamming because you may find yourself
on fifth street folding to two low hands.  REMEMBER JAM WITH YOUR KINGS IN TWO OR
THREE HANDED POTS...I wish you the best of luck and remember a loss is not a
conspiracy against you...THREEKARD, CARNIVAL

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                 The Wall of Steel: a mediocre guide to winning ways

     Well, as promised a while ago to various managers, in delayed celebration of the
graduation of Jumbo Mumbo AND in a blatant attempt to recoup some "bonus" points from
Crip (to counter-balance my poor tourney showing!) for the final turn of the kontest
(assuming I didn't get pushed out into third spot already!)....  Here is a little
diatribe into the style I've had most success with in my almost 10 years of playing.  (Can it really be that long now from Euro Gen-Con, Crip??)
     The Waste, WS or Wall of Steel is, in my opinion, probably the third easiest
style to set up and run in the game (the first two being TP and ST).  They're not too
demanding with stats, though I do have some minimum requirements, as shown below.
Here's what I think you need"

ST -- Min 9, prefer 11+, 15-21 is good if you have the opportunity!
CN -- Need normal damage taking, Good + is even better
SZ -- Whatever.  Need normal damage, prefer good+
WT -- Whatever.  Obviously determines skill learns
WL -- 15+ Prefer 17-21 Needed for all physicals + skills!
SP -- Anything, not needed!  The lower the better to save points for elsewhere!
DF -- 11+ Prefer higher but need the points elsewhere first!

     As you can see, not overly "picky" requirements.  ALL my success with this style
(TCs, TVs, graduates, etc.) has come from the above formula.
     Physicals (Damage doing/taking, endurance & carry capacity):  These are almost
more important than skills for this style.  Don't underestimate them!  My most
successful WS had tremendous carry, great endurance & damage, good damage taking AND
a huge slice of luck in both skills and physicals.
     Skills:  What you need is parry and attack.  Hence the requirements for WL/ST
and DF, don't worry about other skills to begin with.
     Here are a few designs that have made fine WS's.
     ST     17     10     12     21     15     10
     CN     13     14     13     11     12     10
     SZ      7     11      8      4      9      9
     WT      7     15     17     11     15     17
     WL     20     17     17     21     17     17
     SP      5      4      4      3      7      4
     DF     15     13     13     13     11     17
     I have run all of these.  They contain a 2 time TC (Penelopy Pitstop), a champs
TV (Master BVIII), a bloodgames DYO (who died at 3-2-2) and Jumbo Mumbo, who managed
an impressive 19-2 record here on graduation.  As you can see, the only real
requirement I stick to is for high Will.
     So, you have a roll-up that fits the requirements (some all but demand to be WS
in my opinion, Jumbo Mumbo was one such), now what to do to run them & win??
     Well, as you can see from my choice of design style, I like my WS to be able to
take a hit or two AND carry a reasonable amount of armour.  They are a defensive
style, and fight best with this in mind for me.  Put the armour on, give them an off-
hand shield and use those parry skills to good effect!
     That leads us nicely into rhythm.  As for any style, each warrior varies
slightly with favourites and some just seem to be more "knacky" than others, but
generally I try a slow (low-mod offensive effort/ v.low-low activity level),
sometimes parry modified, start followed by a moderate, normally "open" (unmodified)
strategy based on "classic" WS faves (mod/low), tailing off towards min 6 to conserve
endurance (which WS's eat at a frightening rate at times!).  Don't forget that
carrying a heavy loads and parrying lots of attacks is enough to drain even good
endurance warriors running defensively in quickly!!  I won't "spoon feed" too much
info re:  exact strats, rather leave that for your further experimentation.
Desperation strategy, kill desire and attack/protect location are matters of personal
choice.  Sometimes I try an offensive desperation strat, others I will look for faves
or be defensive.
     Why don't I design and run my WS's more offensively??  Well, I've tried but 1)
They don't do as well for me, 2) It's a waste of their natural defensive abilities
(if you excuse the pun!) and 3) If you want an offensive WS, why not make a
     OK, having designed and set strats we need to decide on weapons and armour.
Generally with armour, more is good if you run defensively and have enough endurance/
carry capacity, just pile it on!  Of course, if you're fighting other defensive types
or scum you may need to lighten the load to last longer!  As for weapons, they fall
generally into two categories, slashing (SC, BS, BA, GA) and bashing (WF, QS, MS,
GA).  {Apologies if I miss some, I'm working from the top of my head!}  Against
offensives I generally use a primary weapon and shield, against defensives I may
switch to a single weapon or two handed weapons, SC, BS, BA and QS are generally
regarded to be the better weapons of this selection, but don't be blinkered, Jumbo
Mumbo ran almost exclusively with a WF+ME combo (just to be able to ridicule
opponents, you understand...beaten by a wiffle wielding beast!) and it didn't hurt
the record too much!!
     So...you have design, strategy and equipment sorted, you're just about ready to
go.  As with EVERY warrior, challenges and avoids make a huge difference to your
chances, avoid slashers, aimed blows and scum unless you're ready for them; target
anything with low endurance or poor attack ratings (strikers should be meat and drink
for WS) with decent parry/damage taking ability even some higher attack offensives
(LU/BA/PL) are good prey as they "burn out" more quickly leaving themselves open to
the counter attack.
     Follow this simple guide and, with good challenge/avoids and a slice of luck,
you can turn even "mediocre" roll-ups into arena monsters.  In case you hadn't
already guessed, Jumbo Mumbo is roll-up number 2 above, raw numbers were 10-13-11-10-
12-4-10 I think, hardly awe-inspiring stuff or that hard to find out there, but
helping to turn such a RU into such a success gave me a lot of satisfaction and helps
hold my interest in this fine game!
     Anyway, maybe you'll find this useful, maybe not, just remember one final thing;
there could be a lot of people out there reading this...don't follow too strictly or
be too rigid, for every strategy there's a counter stratagem!!
     Finally, as a last piece of butt-kissing, an acknowledgment to the manager who
led me down the path to enlightenment for this game and this style...you guessed it,
our kontest MC again...Crip.

Spawn, manager Spoonertiks.

     >)]H[(< + -----:----- + >)] The Free Cities #74 [(< + -----:----- + >)]H[(<


     The Prince of Malcorn listened carefully as Fist of Kjarran and his companions
described the monster on the road to Murska, what it had done up till now and how
they had dealt with it.  When Fist repeated Cadal's statement that the matter was not
settled and could not be settled in simple combat, the prince sighed and nodded.
"That's true," he admitted.  "The dregur can be driven off with steel, but they can't
be finally settled that way.  It takes magic to bind and unbind them, because an
essential part of their nature is magical."
     Stiffly, Aghtamar said, "We heard that it was you who set them loose
     "For what I considered good and sufficient reason, yes, I did," Malcorn agreed.
"How many invaders did you encounter on the road here from Korga?"
     "Invaders?"  The Korgan woman shook her head, puzzled.  "None.  I hear they're
pulling out all along the coast, going back to their homelands, I suppose, and about
     "About time," Malcorn agreed.  "It was the dregur who finally convinced them of
that.  Not all dregur are criminals like the one you fought, probably no more than
might be found in a similar group of humans.  I made an agreement, which the
responsible leaders of the dregur entered into fully and fairly.  They will help us
deal with the few among them who are criminal."
     "They'll...help?" Zilla asked faintly.  "Wonderful.  Just wonderful."
     "They said they'd clean up their own snakes."  The gladiators turned to peer
into the dark corner.  The man sitting there, who had been so silent he hadn't been
noticed, was plainly a Karnhorn.  A Karnhorn of a familiar type--by his clothing,
which was fashionable but not highly so, and very plainly made, a man of the lower
ranks of the nobility, and impoverished, Aghtamar decided.  Probably a minor
bureaucrat.  Which made his presence here, on terms of familiarity with the Prince of
Malcorn, a puzzle.  Not her puzzle to solve, she hoped.
     "I know they did, Tiljanz, and I believe they intend to do so," Malcorn replied. 
"But I don't see any harm in providing them with...witnesses to their fulfillment of
the agreement."
     "To make sure they have no second thoughts?" Tiljanz asked.  He sounded a little
amused, but only a little.  "No harm in that," he agreed.  "I shall certainly go
along to see that the terms of the agreement are met."
     "No offense intended," Fist said quickly, "but this will be a job for warriors.
You don't look like--"
     "I am not a warrior," the young Karnhorn answered calmly.  "And I take no
offense at your warning, intended as it is to preserve my life.  But life is not
enough, there must be self-respect, as well."
     "Tiljanz al Burgos is as steady a man as you'll find," Malcorn cut in.  "He
won't run, and he won't get in your way.  We'll take him with us."
     "With...us?" Aghtamar asked faintly.
     "Yes, I'm coming, too," the Prince of Malcorn answered.

     Fist of Kjarran had expected to leave immediately, or at least first thing the
next morning.  But two full days passed before Lord Malcorn and the Karnhorn
bureaucrat were ready to go.  Two days during which he considered going without them.
But there were always several Shews, large, Lord Protector Shews, standing between
him and the door when those thoughts came to him.
     And then when they did finally set out, Fist of Kjarran, Aghtamar, Zilla, Cadal,
Malcorn, and Tiljanz al Burgos, Fist found himself wishing that some of those big,
tough-looking Shews were coming, too.

     >)]H[(< + -----:----- + >)] The Free Cities #75 [(< + -----:----- + >)]H[(<


     Ghenis threw down the handful of papers in disgust.  Invoices for the purchase
of black candles and sacrificial knives, chickens, rabbits...potatoes?  An angry note
from the man in charge of the cult's storeroom, demanding an investigation to
determine what had happened to three yards of black cloth and a pound of onions that
should have been there and weren't.  A requisition for a cushion "to kneel on while
praying"--gods!  Members of dark cults were supposed to be TOUGH.  All these
pettifogging little details were an insult to the whole IDEA of a dark cult.  He had
a dark suspicion that Pelishtekan had deliberately dumped this work on him, this
FILING, to get back at him for something.  The Ferencian was always "getting back at
people," and often for the slightest of slights.  It just showed you what kind of
people Easterners were!
     Ghenis looked at the papers that were now scattered on the floor of his cubicle
and came to a decision.  He had had enough.  He walked out into the hall, taking care
to tread on as many of the papers as he could in the process.  These "administrative
details" were the Ferencian's doing, but there might, still, be a proper dark god at
the head of the cult.  He would find out, and if there was such a deity, he would
give it proper worship, with blood--and not chicken or rabbit blood--and dark deeds.
And if not...Pelishtekan would find out that Hell had NOTHING like the fury of a dark
cultist scorned.
     Ghenis began to consider ways in which he might discover the truth at the heart
of the cult.

Elsewhere in Zukal:

     Jorja rubbed her forehead tiredly, which didn't do a thing to relieve the
headache.  She wasn't sure just how SHE had been appointed to organize the overthrow
of Sekahos, one of Inzolas' men and the current ruler of Zukal.  What business was it
of hers?  She was Adantri, dammit.  She sighed.  Doreg's doing, probably.  Doreg
was--or had been--one of the Bandit Princes of Zukal.  Their association had been
brief; she hadn't even liked the man much.  But apparently that was enough.  By
Mantor's blazing sword, it was MORE than enough.
     If getting rid of Sekahos was what it took to shut up the yammering Bandit
Princes, then she would do it.
     The first thing she needed was information.  Spies.  She began to go over the
list of gladiators she might call on for assistance.

Somewhere between Veastian and North Fork:

     Emir Kyreses of Veastian shrugged and sighed.  "I know.  You meet the Mad
Khaliv's minions on land, and I have no doubt they're a major problem.  But--"
     "AND we shelter YOU from them," Gorich of North Fork cut in.  "WE bear the
burden of his demon soldiers, not--"
     "We meet them at sea," Kyreses countered.  "Most of our ships are destroyed or
dare not return from southern ports, no sailors can be found who will ship out of--or
into--Veastian.  To say nothing of the damage this has done to our economy, we--"
     "Something must be done."  Gorich glared at Kyreses, daring him to counter THAT
     The Karnhorn did not.  "I agree.  But I don't know what will answer our needs
best.  To kill the Mad Khaliv is obvious, and it MAY be enough...or it may simply
free all the demons he's bound to his service."
     "Aye."  The swampman was silent for a moment.  Then he shrugged.  "But at least
it's a place to start.  But to assassinate the Mad Khaliv will take men very nearly
as mad as he is."
     "Gladiators," Kyreses said.  "That is who we must send."

This is a general call for warriors who want to be in adventures.  Any warriors from
any arenas, Basic or Advanced, any region, are welcome.  A personal or a diplo to
Scribe will do the trick.

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                        ---===FREE BLADES REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 481): BLUE GOOSE of BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 479): SNAGGLE PUSS of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 475): MAN O' WAR of TRIPLE CROWN (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 476): ROWARDENN of SAILS OF CHARON (The Sentinel, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 474): GHENGIS KHAN of HEROESANDFOUNDONES (The Judge, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 473): MALKAI of DRAGON JUNKIES (Youngblood, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 236): COA PATTY of KESSEN (Iker, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 465): PYGMY SHREW of SHREW CAN IT BE NOW (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 234): MACIOBELLY of UNFIT TO BE ORCS (Slugbait, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 461): FIZGIGG of FISHERMAN'S WHARF (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 459): MIKE TV of WILLY WONKA INC. (Distorted, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 452): BRAN AP CADAL of CHILDREN OF LLYR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 416): FACE BREAKER of WIDOWMAKERS (Soultender, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 211): SNOWFALL of NORTHERN LIGHTS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 205): STRAW FIRE of LAND OF OZ (Oz the Successful, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 192): IRIADOR of DRUID'S GROVE (Talon Warsmith, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 340): WORMY of BAD APPLES (Uncle Wolf, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 320): SWINGLINED SUE of PISSED AT WORK (Nuln, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 141): PIXIE BLIGHT of DARQUE FORCES VIII (Master Darque, mgr.)
                                (Shadowgate, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 481): DREAM PARK (Zalgor Prigg, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 479): ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 475): TRIPLE CROWN (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 476): BLACKHEART'S AXE (?, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 474): DELTA DOOM (Barnabas, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 473): DRAGON JUNKIES (Youngblood, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 236): none
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 465): EQUESTORS (Spartacus, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 234): WORDS TO THE WISE (Wordsmith, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 461): SARATOGA GLORY (The Trainer, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 459): OBSIDIAN HALL (Dameon Darkheart, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 452): CHILDREN OF LLYR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 416): WIDOWMAKERS (Soultender, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 211): MIKES MORGUE (Mike, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 205): MYSTIC ORC FEAST (Slugbait, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 192): MIDDLE WAY 6 (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 340): BAD APPLES (Uncle Wolf, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 320): FAVORITE GUYS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 141): MAGIC MAYHEM (Fizban, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 366): WENSINWASIN (Youngblood, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 479): DENOGGINIZER of BLOODSUCKERS (Way Cool, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 475): WEDNESDAY of THE DARK TIDES (Diaretic, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 473): FOGGY DEW of KINDRED OF KAOS (PTFT, mgr.)
                            ADOBE of DELTA DOOM (Barnabas, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 465): PYGMY SHREW of SHREW CAN IT BE NOW (The Anarchist, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 234): MACIOBELLY of UNFIT TO BE ORCS (Slugbait, mgr.)
                               GAELIN BLACKTALON of THE NIGHTHAWKS (Firehawk, mgr.)
                   (turn 233): FREY of STORMWATCH (Polar Bear, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 459): MIKE TV of WILLY WONKA INC. (Distorted, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 211): SNOWFALL of NORTHERN LIGHTS (Jorja, mgr.)
                   (turn 210): BINGE N PURGE of EMETICS (Berylstar, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 205): THE MIGHTY SORE of DRAKE'S COMICS (Drake, mgr.)
                   (turn 204): BEAR KEEPER of CARNIVAL (Carny, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 192): IRIADOR of DRUID'S GROVE (Talon Warsmith, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 141): PIXIE BLIGHT of DARQUE FORCES VIII (Master Darque, mgr.)

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Golly, golly, golly.  I have made it!  I am the Duelmaster of North Fork.  Wow!
I am so proud.  I have worked hard for years to put myself in position to deserve a
chance at this title, and finally I reached the epitome.
     Many moons ago I started out in the rookie tournament with a reasonable 4-3
entry.  My very first arena battle was with Doomsinger's King of The Dead where I was
promptly waxed!  I did a little better in the Apprentice Tournament group at 5-3.
From then on it was all pretty mediocre, but I worked my buns off to improve.  This
past Champion's Tournament I was pleased with my 5-3, as I fought 2 strikers, 4
lungers, a piker and a scum.  Tent In Quarantino, a Spoonertics associate helped set
me up, and then it was my majestic battle with 101 Proof of Coffee Rules.  And here I
     Now I have a difficult choice.  The Challenger's Champs is composed of 8 good
friends and fine warriors, 7 who have styles which I feel deficient to.  Oz has
always felt that when one reaches the pinnacle and has the title, first allegiance
for challenges should be to our closest friends--to keep the title in the friendship,
so to speak.  What shall I do?
     A salute to all North Forkers.  We have a great Arena and city.  May you all
prosper to infinity.

          Straw Fire (a hot little bugger)

                                      SPY REPORT

     You elder fighters surely remember me.  The younger ones may call me Olaf 
Modeen.  I return to NORTH FORK once again!  Bein' on top is great while it lasts, 
MYSTIC ORC FEAST.  But how many friends do you have now?  Phhbltt!  Too much drinking 
and too little dodging gave COFFEE RULES! a 1-4-0!  I got a good laugh out of it!  Ya 
gotta be quick on yer feet!  Keep your elbow off the table!  Thrust!  Block out the 
pain!  THE JESUITS is now ranked 12th with a 5-0-1 turn.  It seems so recently people 
were saying CARNIVAL was washed up, finished.  But 4-1-0 moved them up 6.  I guess 
they're washed no more...  What's with PERFECT PARRI?  He actually beat LAND OF OZ's 
AXE, and walked away with 26 more points from the fight.  Major screwup at LAND OF 
OZ.  AXE lost 20 points to PERFECT PARRI.  Some new strategies, perhaps?  Maybe AXE 
will provide more easy wins...  Try as she might, ONE HIT WONDER wasn't good enough 
at persuading STRAW FIRE to step down from the Duelmaster's throne...  I suppose you 
want to hear some rumors and dirty gossip about your fellow fighters?  Tough!   
     Speaking of cowardly avoiders and unfair challenges...  The most avoided team 
was SPOONERTIKS.  The bums at CARNIVAL couldn't face the challenges from SPOONERTIKS! 
No excuse for that!  What do people see in RAINBOW?  Hers 8-7-0?  LAND OF OZ ain't 
talkin', but she's got 66 points.  Maybe COFFEE RULES!'s BOMBAY is one of those gals 
who likes pain, or something.  That's what she'll get next week, after challenging up 
29 to RAINBOW.  As I expected, RAINBOW won BOMBAY.  Not to start anything, but, 
BOMBAY, now that you've faced her and seen hers style, you might try it again!  Keep 
challenging up 50 points, TENT IN QUARANTINO, and I won't have to write about you 
much longer.  UR BRAIN ON EGG always accepts those kind of challenges...  Sometimes 
what you expect to do (like in the fights) doesn't expect to turn out like you 
thought.  TENT IN QUARANTINO subdued UR BRAIN ON EGG.  It don't make sense.  Maybe 
THE FEDERATION's SEVEN OF NINE is one of those gals who likes pain, or something.  
That's what she'll get next week, after challenging up 29 to BEAR ACUDA.  BEAR ACUDA 
must not been fighting well, cause she lost to SEVEN OF NINE of THE FEDERATION.  
Sometimes you just have a bad day where things get, um, mixed up.   
     A fighter's lot is filled with strife, revenge, and killing.  Some fighters 
don't accept this.  The best do.  THE MIGHTY SORE looked pretty sick and surprised 
when he learned DRAKE'S COMICS is sending him to the Dark Arena!  Whadd'he expect 
with a 18-10-0?  Some people are wondering why DRAKE'S COMICS sent THE MIGHTY SORE 
(18-10-0) to the Dark Arena.  Just be glad you're not on their team.  Many a warrior 
has met his fate in a hungover stupor.  You young rapscallions, take note!   
     Well, I'm pretty much through.  You guys need to get back practicing.  NORTH 
FORK is a nice place to live, but I don't like to live in nice places.  I don't want 
to overstay my welcome...-- Olaf Modeen  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 STRAW FIRE 4350              14   7  0   134       LAND OF OZ (217)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HONEY BEAR 3032              21  14  0   126       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 100% COLUMBIAN 4874          12   7  2   108       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 FRANC N' STEEN 4649          18   6  0    99       CARNIVAL (411)
 101 PROOF!! 4495             17  14  0    98       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 TENT IN QUARANTINO 4816      17   5  0    93       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 CAPTAIN MARBLE 4634          14  11  0    92       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
 ONE HIT WONDER 4680          17   7  0    91       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 SUGAR CUBE 4617              15  12  0    91       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 BLACK JACK SHELACK 4850      12   9  0    91       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 SPAWN 4283                    8   6  0    91       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KIRA NERYS 4941               9   5  1    87       THE FEDERATION (539)
 UR BRAIN ON EGG 4703         13   9  1    85       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 CUP OF CAT 4926              11   7  0    85       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 ACE BAILEY 4948               8   8  0    83       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 FOLMOR GRIGG 4501            16  26  0    74       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 BELANNA TORRES 4898           9  10  0    74       THE FEDERATION (539)
 DEEP FRIED LARD 4975         12   1  0    73       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
-SEKA 4612                    11  13  0    68       SCREEN DREAMS (488)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BEARFOOT 4875                10  10  0    66       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 RAINBOW 4553                  8   7  0    66       LAND OF OZ (217)
 LATTE 4667                   16   9  0    65       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 INCREDIBLE HULK 4280          9   5  0    58       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KING CRAB 4983                7   5  0    54       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 SEVEN OF NINE 4940            8   6  0    53       THE FEDERATION (539)
-LARA CROFT 4980               6   4  1    53       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
 QUEEN OF DENIAL 4896          8  11  0    51       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 PERFECT PARRI 4967            6   9  0    50       CARNIVAL (411)
 NEDDIE OGIL 4663             11  15  0    48       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 COURAGE 4552                  7   6  1    47       LAND OF OZ (217)
 CRABBS 5093                   5   1  0    45       CARNIVAL (411)
-ARSENIC 4285                  4   7  1    45       PURE POISON (478)
 BEAR NEKKID 5126              4   0  0    45       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 FRUSTRATION 5067              5   1  0    38       MY DAY (557)
 STRYCHNINE 4838               8   4  0    37       PURE POISON (478)
 BOMBAY 5043                   6   2  0    34       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 BEAR ACUDA 4995               5   5  0    34       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 STROKE BROKER 5094            4   2  0    34       SPOONERTIKS (523)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 AXE 4551                      8   6  1    31       LAND OF OZ (217)
 LEVIATHAN OF LARD 5113        4   1  0    31       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 MASS STUPIDITY 5068           6   0  0    27       MY DAY (557)
 CARNAGE 5069                  2   4  0    27       MY DAY (557)
 DABO GIRL 5023                4   4  0    26       THE FEDERATION (539)
 RONY MARTIAS 5090             2   2  0    26       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
 HENBANE 4289                  4   9  0    25       PURE POISON (478)
 JEAN-LUC DELPECH 5089         3   1  0    24       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 IVAN POISY 5112               3   2  0    23       SPOONERTIKS (523)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-NEER BEAR 5073                2   0  0    23       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
 CYANIDE 4286                  2  11  1    22       PURE POISON (478)
 WOLVERINE 4279                3  11  1    21       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
 MAYHEM 5066                   2   4  0    20       MY DAY (557)
 RONDOL QUIGLO 4978            3  10  0    19       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
-KATE 4992                     3   1  0    18       DREWS CREW (546)
 MUTUS BRAXIMUS 5095           4   2  2    16       SPOONERTIKS (523)
-BUFFY 5086                    2   2  0    16       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
-OSWALD 4991                   2   2  0    15       DREWS CREW (546)
-STINGRAY HAMMER 5064          2   1  0    15       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 HOURGLASS 5127                2   1  0    15       LAND OF OZ (217)
 PING KIN 5174                 1   0  0    15       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 NETTLES 5131                  2   1  0    14       CARNIVAL (411)
-DREW 4993                     2   2  0    14       DREWS CREW (546)
 TEN C-0 METER 5141            2   0  0    13       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 HUGR 5170                     1   0  1    13       THE JESUITS (524)
-SAMANTHA THE WITCH 5128       1   0  0     9       SCREEN DREAMS (488)
-HAWKEYE HAMMER 5061           0   3  0     9       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
-LEWIS 4989                    2   2  0     8       DREWS CREW (546)
 THE PUNISHER 5172             1   0  1     8       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
-IRON MAN HAMMER 5063          1   2  0     7       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
-GOLIATH HAMMER 5060           1   2  0     7       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 RENAUD DION 5088              1   3  0     6       BORDEAUX - SAINTES (561)
 WYRD 5167                     1   0  0     6       THE JESUITS (524)
 RAGNAROK 5169                 1   0  0     6       THE JESUITS (524)
 ART PENDRAGON 5151            1   0  0     6       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 GALDR 5171                    1   0  0     6       THE JESUITS (524)
-MIMI 4990                     1   3  0     6       DREWS CREW (546)
 DISIR 5168                    1   0  0     6       THE JESUITS (524)
 HEX ON THE LEACH 5072         0   1  0     5       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
 LUNIEA MILAND 5147            1   1  0     4       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 THE RAMPAGING BULK 5133       1   1  0     4       DRAKE'S COMICS (463)
-PANTHER HAMMER 5062           0   3  0     3       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 CURARE 5132                   0   2  0     2       PURE POISON (478)
 DAREDEVIL 5173                0   1  0     1       FANTASTIC FIVE (477)
 ROLLO'S GIRL 5164             0   1  0     1       CARNIVAL (411)
-SINISTER 5123                 0   1  0     1       EXALTED PATH (565)
 PUDWEISER 5074                0   1  0     1       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
-PENTACLE SILK 5122            0   1  0     1       EXALTED PATH (565)
-KIA 5125                      0   1  0     1       EXALTED PATH (565)
-DAJA LUST 5121                0   1  0     1       EXALTED PATH (565)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
BEARNAISE 5114         1  4 0 THE BEAR'S PAW 150    BANDIT PRINCE 25      206 NONE    
DELARUE 5091           2  1 0 BORDEAUX - SAINTE 561 AXE 4551              205         
THE MIGHTY SORE 4490  18 11 0 DRAKE'S COMICS 463    STONE GOLEM 26        206 NONE    
VALLET 4963            6  6 0 DRAKE'S COMICS 463    LARA CROFT 4980       203 REVENGED
QUICKSILVER 5029       3  2 0 DRAKE'S COMICS 463    ARSENIC 4285          203 REVENGED
ARTIC PROPHECY 5124    0  2 0 EXALTED PATH 565      THE PUNISHER 5172     206         
EZRI-DAX 5140          1  1 0 THE FEDERATION 539    HUGR 5170             206         
BROOMSTICK 4474        8  8 0 LAND OF OZ 217        100% COLUMBIAN 4874   203         
JEM KATOREH 4499      18 22 1 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 506  UR BRAIN ON EGG 4703  204         
MUDDY BLARIE 5071      0  2 0 MIXED-UP MIXERS 558   MUTUS BRAXIMUS 5095   206         
OPIUM 4287             5  5 0 PURE POISON 478       WOLVERINE 4279        203         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Wow!  Best personal?!  Crip says I had the best personal?  Now THAT is a real Royal
Flush! -- Oz The Educated

All, may your holidays be filled with the cheer of the Munchkins; may your tree be as
beautiful as The Emerald City; and may you give and receive gifts as wonderful as The
Ruby Slippers. -- Oz The All Joyful

101 Proof -- That was a classic battle between two champions, either of which
deserved the title.  Luck was merely on my side.  A salute to you. -- Straw Fire

Renaud Dion -- It may seem as though there is some sort of conspiracy, but that is so
far from the truth.  Oz allows nothing but Health, Humility, and Honor. -- Hourglass

Bear Acuda -- I was not so sure I could do that as you are such a highly skilled and
well-managed warrior.  I feel it was a great accomplishment.  Somewhere, over the...
-- Rainbow

Delarue -- Oh, no!  In no way did I mean to cause your demise.  Even though it was
your challenge, I meant no malice.  May you fight well in that great arena in the
sky. -- Axe

Slugbait and Co -- Congrats on ekeing out my Ozers for the 3-Turn Title.  Your crew
deserved it more. -- Oz The All-Praising

Drake, Crip -- For years North Fork has been known as an arena where managers run
full teams and interact with vigor.  I wholeheartedly support that environment. -- Oz
The All-Reminiscent

A ten-gun salute to Ten L'Chtitlan.  He will be missed, Crip. -- Oz The All-Sorrowful

Dr. Mabuse -- I am truly sorry for the recent death to your stable and the seeming
vendetta that could be interpreted from our recent arena results.  I hope you know
that there is nothing personal, my friend.  Your glory is right around the corner. --
Oz The All-Apologetic

Mr. Coffee -- You have a very intelligent point there, my friend.  Thank you. -- Oz
The All-Appreciative

Slugbait -- On those "very rare" occasions where the Mighty Crip ahs lain in waiting
and tossed those water-laden balloons, he has been far too accurate.  Perhaps, now
that he is aging, his accuracy will falter? -- Oz The All-Knowing

Turf War -- Slugbait...Crip...are we together?  Rumor has it there are lurking
Mannequins and lurking Soultakers who have an interest in a five-some. -- Oz The

Spawn -- Your presence is valued and significant.  We will ask The Good Witches to
send some spells your way so that all will be back to normal soon.  Salute! -- Oz The

Drake -- Of course spy reporters are slickery!  Have you ever tried to grab one and
hold on? -- Oz The Ever-Informative

The Mighty Sore of Drake's Comics is now a Lord Protector!  Amen, we say!  Well
deserved. -- All us Ozers

Asmo -- Alliance still undecided.  I am going to declare/play/etc. -- Mr. Coffee

Exalted Path -- Welcome to the Swamp. -- Mr. Coffee, mgr. Coffee Rules!

Oz -- Thanks for the praise; alas it didn't last (being Champ). -- 101 Proof!!

Rainbow -- Thank you.  There's an orc running arond that didn't recognize I had
fine/colorful skills. -- 100% Columbian

Drake -- That's Crip, convuluted, confusing, corny, complicated, and crazy...are you
sure you didn't mean Carny? -- Mr. Coffee
P.S.  Oh, the contest...but that describes Crip.

31 -- Four awards, a record?  I doubt it.  Ask Drake, Crip, Oz, Slugbait, Kat...
they've been here longer than me.  Thanks for the tourney purse.  2 of 5 was nice. --
Mr. Coffee

31 -- Now that I think about it, seems like Slugbait's Orcs ruled the awards for a
long stretch...seems like they had it all...Chartered AND Unchartered (grin). -- Mr.

The Mighty Sore -- Begone permanently from this place, ye falsely proclaimed 3 named
man. -- Black Jack Shellack

Spawn The Warrior -- Wise challenge, you seem to take after Spawn the Manager. --
Black Jack Shellack

Kira Nerys -- Two can play the challenge game. -- Ace Bailey

Crabbs -- There's only room for one giant crab in the this place, and it be me. --
King Crab

Deep Fried Lard -- Yet another ugly match-up. -- Queen of Denial

Daja Lust -- Odd weapons there, maestro.  If you need/seek advice, feel free to send
a diplo. -- Ten C-0 Meter

Neddie Ogil -- Home is where the heart is, a house is simply a residence. -- The
Kitty of Kominality, Kat

Oz -- Oh-impotent-you.  A belated 'welcome back' is in order.  The swamp definitely
missed your presence! -- The All-knowing Abyssinian, Kat

North Fork -- Best wishes for prosperity in the upcoming New Year! -- The Well-
Wishing Wagtail, Kat
P.S.  That goes for the hard-working staff, also.  Shouldn't you be off celebrating

     Make that sleeping rather than celebrating and I'm there. -- Ed. the very tired

Cup of Cat -- Cat is always lucky with a 'bit o honey. -- The Siamese of Sweetness,

Latte -- It's obvious Bearfoot missed his morning java! -- The Calico of Cappuccino,

Bombay -- Would your middle name be SAPPHIRE by chance?  Your victory sends Biarnaise
to the evening arena to be turned to a yolky sauce. -- The Kitty of Kompasion, Kat

Rondol Quiglo -- I simply was looking for some experience.  I didn't expect you to be
bedazzled by Bear Nakedness! -- The Russian-blue Rumple-teaser, Kat

Asmo Dius -- A roll-up sheet should have arrived by now.  I'm informally announcing
that The Bear's Paw will participate in the upcoming Turf War (simply because it's
unavoidable).  Coincidentally, it seems a hoard of people are hanging around my
residence, speaking of some alliance for the fight.  Seems my stock of Butter-Swamp
Tonic has been discovered.  The house won't be clean for a long, long time.  Out of
respect for Crip's Contest, I'll hold off until next month for the formal announcing.
-- Kat

Straw Fire -- Congrats on taking the DM.  The first DM for your manager, I assume. --

Mystic -- #1.  Amazing! -- Carny

UR Brain -- Looked good.

Folmor Grigg -- Your vehement curses get you a 10 silver fine. -- Franc N' Steen

King Crab -- You ruined my unbeaten record.  Why? -- Crabbs

Strichnine -- Let it be a lesson to you. -- Perfect Parri

All -- Who do you fear the most?  Whose name makes your gums bleed?  Who beat you
down with the scummiest of all the scum?  Who subjected your women to the best wine,
dancing and let them join our glorious harem?  Why does every citizen that lives in
North Fork have a way to feed, bathe and house themselves without the worry of
tyranny!  Three glorious words "the MIGHTY MANIC UNION."  Messengers have been sent
to inquire on the great deeds that these few managers accomplished during, after the
last Turf War.  Are they going to return?  Since my retirement even I wonder. --
Manic Fuhrer

Olaf Modeen -- Can you notify the committee to pick up the required fee for the Turf
War from my account and send it to the Judge of this fine contest. -- Goat

31 -- The Klingons are looking to attack, take your phasers off stun, the title must
be defended at all cost.  Send your emissaries to the Skullagrim and Phat Phat
colonies.  If you can't locate them, there could be a place for your mere warriors, I
will wait to hear from your emissaries before I declare. -- Lil Scotty

All -- "The Jesuits" are an experimental team!  So be prepared for some strange win
and losses.  I will be fighting them in the Turf War.  Nice to see that all the same
managers are still here.  I will enjoy crossing blades with you all once again. --

Dr. Mabuse -- Greetings, do you have any idea who is going to Capt. this Turf War for
the Cartel?  Do you know where C.F.H. is?  Good luck. -- Goat

Perfect Parri -- How perfect are we feeling now? -- Strychnine

Crabbs -- Perhaps a different type of poison needed. -- Cyanide

Axe -- Next time I'll try to show up! -- Henbane

Cpt. Marble -- See you in 3 turns! -- Arsenic

Ace Bailey -- Guess those 26 tourney fights paid off.  Nice challenge. -- Kira Nerys

Cyanice -- I got lucky with that win.  I think I was protecting what you were
attacking in min 1.  Nice try and better luck next time. -- Dabo Girl

Incredibly Damaged ACL -- Better have that looked at. -- Belanna Torres

Crip -- Well, a shame you had to go out of the kontest yourself...but seeing as it
was you or me, I wasn't too upset, sorry!  Whatever happens this turn (and my money
is still on Coffee Rules!) I'd like to thank you for running this over the past
year....  Still don't understand the points scoring as it's certainly the most
complicated system I've ever seen!!  Thanks for all your hard work in keeping up with
it...maybe you'll be doing it again sometime?? -- Spawn the grateful

Straw Fire -- I'm still looking for my bucket of water for you...until then, congrats
on the throne! -- Spawn the envious

Jean-Luc Delpech -- Did someome tell you I was soft or something?? -- Stroke B

Captain Marble -- Go away...I'm just pretending that didn't happen!! -- Tent IQ

Nettles -- You are annoying.  I, on the other hand, am deadly! -- Ivan Poisy

Kia -- Unlucky.  I like your style, but it's no simple thing to master.  Try a bigger
weapon?  It works for me! -- Mutus Braximus

Franc N Steen -- Gods, the ignominy, beaten by a side-show freak. -- Folmor Grigg
P.S.  It's as bad as a Visiting Orc.
P.P.S.  But thanks for teaching me four skills.  I can always use skills, and four is
such a balanced number.

Seven of Nine -- Now that is an UN-balanced number.  That's why I won.  You're off
balance. -- Neddie Ogil

Bear Nekkid -- SURELY this is not the season for that?  I'm shivering in my shews,
myself. -- Rondor Quiglo

Artic Prophecy -- Is that a typo, or something esoteric?  Not that I care one way or
the other, so long as I can win. -- Luniea Miland

Ace Bailey and Ed. -- Yes, a nap IS a good idea!  Thanks for bringing it up. --
Folmor Grigg

     Zzzzzzz.... -- Ed.

Mr. Coffee -- As long as I don't have to write actual physical letters, I'll help all
I can. -- Jorja, not the world's best letter writer but not forgetting that I owe you

2 December 2003
ZalCon2, ZalCon Reloaded
Where:  Jhelum, DM 4
When:  February 9th or 23rd, 2003 (TBA when Mail In date set)
How Long:  20 Turns

Restrictions:  Zero FE at start of contest.  Must announce warrior styles by second
arena fight to receive points.  No prize modified warriors.  No entry to July Face,
No TV Challenges.  All prizes to be used exclusively on warriors from the contest
team only.

     First Initiate Duelmaster (FID):  First warrior announced in the contest to
          reach the throne.
     Prize:  Limited Damage Potion, increasing damage for 1 warrior by one rating to
          max for ST/SZ.
     Warrior MVP:  Top warrior based on MVP points accrued in the contest.
     Prize:  Limited Damage Potion, Favorites Knowledge for any warrior on team, +1
          to bonus in any skill area up to max for style for 1 warrior on team, 2
          nights stay at Winter FTF Hotel.
     Team MVP:  Top Team based on MVP points accrued in contest by all the teams
     Prize:  Limited Damage Potion, Favorites Knowledge, +1 to Bonus, 6 Months Free
          Play, 20 Rollups.
     Warrior MVP Top 11:  Next 10 warriors on MVP list at the end of the contest.
     Prize:  +1 to Bonus
     Style Master:  Top warrior in each style based on Style Master points accrued in
          the contest.
     Prize:  Favorites Knowledge of any warrior on team.
     Iron Manager Award:  Minimum 95 fights in contest by any team.
     Prize:  Choice of free entry for team to 2005 Winter Face or +1 to Bonus for one

MVP Point System:  +1 for Win, Fight, Kill, Recognition Leader (after Round 3), -1
Death, +2 Duelmaster, +2 each 3 Consecutive turns as DM, +1 Quality Win (any win over
opponent with 5 or more Rec), +1 for each 10 Rec points over 5 in win (+1 for 5-14
above, +2 for 15-24 above, +3 for 25-34 above).
Style Master Point System:  +2 Style Master, +1 Win vs. Same Style Opponent, +1 Win
vs. Same Style Master, +1 for 3 Consecutive Turns as Style Master (rolling).

     Please direct any question about rules or clarifications to me, Robert
Occhipinti, via Diplo to DM74, 1988 Dodgers or email to zalgor@hotmail.com.  All
rules decisions made by me are final and binding within the confines of this contest.

8 December 2003
Greetings!  I would like to invite everyone to Jhans (DM 36) for the first annual kLk
St. Valentine's Day Massacre (kill contest).  We will start the contest off with the
ceremonial burning of the Andorian flag on turn 450.  (Six turns away.  Roughly mid-
February.)  The contest will run for 10 turns.  On turn 461, 3 separate victors will
be announced.  Team with the most kills, warrior with the most kills, and alliance
with the most kills.  Prizes will be awarded to the manager of the team with the most
kills and to the manager of the warrior with the most kills.  The prizes will
probably be team roll-ups.  The number of roll-ups has yet to be determined.  The
contest is sponsored by Jhans' newest, (but by the time the contest starts) largest
alliance, the kLk (pronounced "klick"). -- Polarius, mgr. of Blitzkrieg DM 36

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

THE MIGHTY SORE was viciously butchered by STONE GOLEM in a 3 minute Dark Arena fight.
FORBES BUSHMAN was murdered by ARENAMASTER OKEL in a 1 minute Dark Arena melee.
BEARNAISE was dispatched by BANDIT PRINCE in a 2 minute bloody Dark Arena brawl.
MUDDY BLARIE was slain by MUTUS BRAXIMUS in a 1 minute Bloodfeud fight.
100% COLUMBIAN demolished CUP OF CAT in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge competition.
BOMBAY was outlasted by RAINBOW in a tiresome 22 minute Challenge struggle.
101 PROOF!! was unbelievably bested by HONEY BEAR in a 8 minute Challenge competition.
DEEP FRIED LARD outwaited LATTE in a slow 13 minute gruesome expert's Challenge duel.
KIRA NERYS vanquished FOLMOR GRIGG in a 1 minute brutal one-sided Challenge fight.
TENT IN QUARANTINO overcame UR BRAIN ON EGG in a 2 minute veteran's Challenge bout.
BELANNA TORRES was subdued by SPAWN in a 2 minute Challenge competition.
FRANC N' STEEN outwaited SUGAR CUBE in a 7 minute brutal veteran's Challenge contest.
COURAGE was bested by INCREDIBLE HULK in a crowd pleasing 1 minute Challenge bout.
BEARFOOT handily defeated QUEEN OF DENIAL in a 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
DABO GIRL was defeated by CRABBS in a action packed 2 minute Challenge struggle.
SEVEN OF NINE handily defeated BEAR ACUDA in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout.
CARNAGE devastated CYANIDE in a 1 minute brutal one-sided Challenge brawl.
IVAN POISY was subdued by STRYCHNINE in a 3 minute brutal Challenge bout.
RENAUD DION was narrowly defeated by TEN C-0 METER in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
RONY MARTIAS devastated WOLVERINE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
JEAN-LUC DELPECH viciously subdued HOURGLASS in a 6 minute gory Challenge match.
NETTLES overcame LUNIEA MILAND in a 2 minute beginner's Challenge duel.
STRAW FIRE devastated ONE HIT WONDER in a popular 1 minute gory one-sided Title bout.
ACE BAILEY lost to CAPTAIN MARBLE in a 5 minute veteran's match.
BLACK JACK SHELACK vanquished VETERAN MERCENARY in a 2 minute one-sided fight.
STROKE BROKER was subdued by KING CRAB in a exciting 1 minute melee.
AXE was vanquished by PERFECT PARRI in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
NEDDIE OGIL was overcome by BEAR NEKKID in a 2 minute mismatched bout.
FRUSTRATION outwaited THE USEROUS MERCHANT in a tiring 18 minute bout.
MASS STUPIDITY outlasted RONDOL QUIGLO in a 7 minute duel.
HENBANE was overcome by LEVIATHAN OF LARD in a exciting 1 minute brutal fight.
MAYHEM savagely defeated THE RAMPAGING BULK in a exciting 4 minute brutal fight.
ARTIC PROPHECY was savagely slain by THE PUNISHER in a 1 minute bloody novice's fray.
CURARE lost to DISIR in a 1 minute amateur's fight.
EZRI-DAX was killed by HUGR in a 2 minute amateur's match.
HEX ON THE LEACH was savagely defeated by WYRD in a 2 minute brutal novice's fray.
PUDWEISER was narrowly defeated by ART PENDRAGON in a 3 minute novice's conflict.
ROLLO'S GIRL was narrowly defeated by RAGNAROK in a 3 minute gory beginner's bout.
GALDR slimly won victory over DAREDEVIL in a action packed 1 minute amateur's match.
PING KIN overpowered PERSISTENT BEGGAR in a 1 minute one-sided fight.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|LUNGING ATTACK                  16         WALL OF STEEL     69 -  42 -  1      62  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   14         TOTAL PARRY       60 -  40 -  0      60  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     11         STRIKING ATTACK   54 -  47 -  5      53  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 10         LUNGING ATTACK    78 -  75 -  6      51  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   7         PARRY-LUNGE       14 -  16 -  1      47  |
|AIMED BLOW                       4         AIMED BLOW        18 -  23 -  0      44  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     4         BASHING ATTACK    41 -  55 -  4      43  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         SLASHING ATTACK   15 -  24 -  0      38  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  3         PARRY-RIPOSTE      7 -  17 -  1      29  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         PARRY-STRIKE       6 -  20 -  0      23  |

Turn 206 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

LUNGING ATTACK    11 -  5     STRIKING ATTACK    4 -  6         4  TOTAL PARRY    
TOTAL PARRY        7 -  4     WALL OF STEEL      5 -  9         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
BASHING ATTACK     4 -  3     PARRY-RIPOSTE      1 -  2         3  WALL OF STEEL  
AIMED BLOW         2 -  2     SLASHING ATTACK    1 -  2         1  AIMED BLOW     
PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  1     PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  3     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   STRAW FIRE 4350            14   7  0  134 LAND OF OZ (217)
TOTAL PARRY      HONEY BEAR 3032            21  14  0  126 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
WALL OF STEEL    101 PROOF!! 4495           17  14  0   98 COFFEE RULES! (505)
AIMED BLOW       TENT IN QUARANTINO 4816    17   5  0   93 SPOONERTIKS (523)
STRIKING ATTACK  KIRA NERYS 4941             9   5  1   87 THE FEDERATION (539)
SLASHING ATTACK  COURAGE 4552                7   6  1   47 LAND OF OZ (217)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    BEAR NEKKID 5126            4   0  0   45 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is 100% COLUMBIAN 4874.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was 101 PROOF!! 4495.  The ten other most popular fighters were UR BRAIN ON EGG 
4703, CRABBS 5093, MAYHEM 5066, SUGAR CUBE 4617, IVAN POISY 5112, NETTLES 5131, 

The least popular fighter this week was BOMBAY 5043.  The other ten least popular 
4978, AXE 4551, and WOLVERINE 4279.

The following warriors have traveled to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after fighting this turn:



     Beginning at the Winter Face-to-Face in Tempe (January 2004), we will implement 
several changes affecting tournaments.  The tournament announcement for the upcoming 
FTF and future tourneys will reflect these changes.
     First, we will eliminate the tourney freeze for all regular DM warrior classes.  
Regular DM warriors will not be classed ahead of the tournament, but instead will 
fight according to their FE on the date of the tourney.  There will still be a freeze 
for the ADM classes, occurring on the same timeline as before, approximately 6 weeks 
before the tournament.
     In addition to the above change, the warrior classes will be slightly altered.  
The new tourney classes will be as follows:

                DM Tourney Classes                 ADM Tourney Classes
              ======================              ======================
                  0 FE:  Rookies                        Freshmen
                1-4 FE:  Apprentices                    ADM
               5-10 FE:  Initiates                      Eligibles
              11-20 FE:  Adepts                      ---induction---
              21-30 FE:  Champions                      Contenders
                31+ FE:  Challengers                    Primus

     All regular DM tourney classes will remain solely FE based.  All ADM classes will 
now be based on warrior characteristics (i.e., the ADM split algorithm), including the 
Freshmen class.
     The Gateway and Primus arenas will be merging before the FTF to form one top 
arena.  These warriors will be split into two tournament classes, the Contenders and 
the Primus classes, again based upon their characteristics.  More information on this 
will be published in the newsletters for those arenas.
     If you have any questions about the above changes, please contact Customer 
Service.  Good luck in your games.

                                          -- Green Eyes and the RSI staff

                  MAIL-IN TOURNEY XXXII

PRIMUS TOURNEY                         W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
KING KEY 281 (115-91-0)                4  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
KING PIN 282 (112-85-2)                4  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          

ADM TOURNEY                            W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
KING UVDAHELL 1643 (30-12-1)           6  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          

FRESHMEN TOURNEY                       W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
THREEKARD 4600 (14-10-1)               4  3  0         CARNIVAL             

CHAMPIONS TOURNEY                      W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
100% COLUMBIAN 4874 (10-6-2)           8  2  0         COFFEE RULES!        
STRAW FIRE 4350 (11-7-0)               5  3  0         LAND OF OZ           
101 PROOF!! 4495 (16-12-0)             0  2  0         COFFEE RULES!        
LATTE 4667 (15-7-0)                    0  2  0         COFFEE RULES!        
SUGAR CUBE 4617 (14-10-0)              0  2  0         COFFEE RULES!        

ADEPTS TOURNEY                         W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
ACE BAILEY 4948 (7-6-0)                7  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
CUP OF CAT 4926 (11-4-0)               2  3  0         MYSTIC ORC FEAST     
QUEEN OF DENIAL 4896 (8-8-0)           2  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
RAINBOW 4553 (6-6-0)                   2  3  0         LAND OF OZ           
INCREDIBLE HULK 4280 (7-4-0)           1  3  0         FANTASTIC FIVE       

INITIATES TOURNEY                      W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
COURAGE 4552 (6-5-1)                   3  3  1         LAND OF OZ           
KIRA NERYS 4941 (7-4-1)                2  3  0         THE FEDERATION       
TEN O'CHTITLAN 4982 (6-3-0)            1  3  0  DEAD   ROYAL FLUSH          
BEAR ACUDA 4995 (4-3-0)                0  2  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       
LARA CROFT 4980 (6-3-1)                0  2  0         SCREEN DREAMS        

APPRENTICES TOURNEY                    W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
BOMBAY 5043 (5-0-0)                    8  2  0         COFFEE RULES!        
DABO GIRL 5023 (2-3-0)                 5  3  0         THE FEDERATION       

NOVICES TOURNEY                        W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
FRUSTRATION 5067 (2-1-0)               6  3  0         MY DAY               
JUGGLENOUGHT 5111 (1-1-0)              5  3  1  DEAD   DRAKE'S COMICS       
BUFFY 5086 (1-2-0)                     4  3  1         SCREEN DREAMS        
MASS STUPIDITY 5068 (3-0-0)            4  3  0         MY DAY               
LAVERGNE 5092 (2-0-0)                  2  2  1  DEAD   BORDEAUX - SAINTES   
LEVIATHAN OF LARD 5113 (1-1-0)         2  3  0         MYSTIC ORC FEAST     
CARNAGE 5069 (1-2-0)                   1  3  0         MY DAY               
IVAN POISY 5112 (2-0-0)                1  3  0         SPOONERTIKS          
CHAOS 5065 (2-1-0)                     0  2  0  DEAD   MY DAY               
IRON MAN HAMMER 5063 (1-1-0)           0  2  0         AVENGER HAMMERZ      
MAYHEM 5066 (0-3-0)                    0  2  0         MY DAY               
STROKE BROKER 5094 (2-1-0)             0  2  0         SPOONERTIKS          

ROOKIES TOURNEY                        W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
DA TINY 5129 (0-0-0)                   6  3  0         DRAKE'S COMICS       
AUTHORITY 5078 (0-0-0)                 4  3  0         CARTMAN              
BRAD 5058 (0-0-0)                      4  3  0         FASCIST FEW          
HOURGLASS 5127 (0-0-0)                 4  3  0         LAND OF OZ           
TARRED MEANY 5115 (0-0-0)              4  3  1         MIXED-UP MIXERS      
BLOW POP 5109 (0-0-0)                  2  3  0         SWEET DESIRES        
SAMANTHA THE WITCH 5128 (0-0-0)        2  3  0         SCREEN DREAMS        
HEX ON THE LEACH 5072 (0-0-0)          1  3  0         MIXED-UP MIXERS      
BIT O HONEY 5108 (0-0-0)               0  2  0         SWEET DESIRES        
GOOD & PLENTY 5105 (0-0-0)             0  2  0         SWEET DESIRES        
JUICY FRUIT 5107 (0-0-0)               0  2  0         SWEET DESIRES        
SLOW POKE 5106 (0-0-0)                 0  2  0         SWEET DESIRES        

DEAD CHAMPIONS TOURNEY                 W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
BOSS TEN 1988 (11-12-0)                5  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
JACK O'LANTERN 2762 (5-4-0)            2  2  0  DEAD   ROYAL FLUSH          
ACE FREHLEY 3669 (10-9-0)              2  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
JACK EENTHABOCKS 2252 (10-7-0)         2  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
ELLIE MAE 4751 (7-5-1)                 1  3  0         SCREEN DREAMS        
SCORPION KING 4718 (8-3-0)             1  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
CJ 4752 (7-8-2)                        0  2  0         SCREEN DREAMS        
JACK HAMMER 3790 (9-6-0)               0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          

DEAD ADEPTS TOURNEY                    W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
GREEN LATRINE 4160 (2-1-0)             6  3  0         DRAKE'S COMICS       
HEMLOCK 4288 (0-1-0)                   4  3  0         PURE POISON          
KAIN PILLER 4969 (2-4-0)               4  3  0         SPOONERTIKS          
MELCHIZEDEK 4729 (7-10-2)              4  3  0         THE JESUITS          
ACE METRIC 3554 (3-4-0)                1  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
BROOMSTICK 4474 (8-8-0)                1  3  0         LAND OF OZ           
TOP TEN LIST 2953 (3-1-0)              1  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
TEN A. SHUSS 1642 (1-1-0)              0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          

DEAD INITIATES TOURNEY                 W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
ELLIE MAE 4374 (0-1-0)                 3  3  0         SCREEN DREAMS        
LUMBER JACK 2909 (1-1-0)               1  3  1         ROYAL FLUSH          

DEAD APPRENTICES TOURNEY               W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
NORMA JEAN 5017 (2-0-0)                4  3  0         SCREEN DREAMS        
JACK RABBIT 4814 (0-1-0)               2  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
JEANIE 4584 (0-1-0)                    1  3  0         SCREEN DREAMS        
NUZZLY FLAVA 5075 (0-1-0)              0  2  0         MIXED-UP MIXERS