Date   : 12/28/2004    Duedate: 01/24/2005


DM-47    TURN-219

This Weeks Top Honors


LAND OF OZ (217)
(47-4552) [16-10-1,129]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

COURAGE                        GREEDY
LAND OF OZ (217)               RAT SALAD (577)
(47-4552) [16-10-1,129]        (47-5223) [5-2-0,44]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

LEPPADA                        KENSAI
TREBORS (232)                  RAT SALAD (577)
(47-2257) [13-19-0,58]         (47-5267) [2-4-0,17]


LAND OF OZ (217)

Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)       58
2. TOMBSTONE (555)             51      MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
3. LAND OF OZ (217)            48      Unchartered Team
4. NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)  38
5. NEMESIS (32)                38      TOMBSTONE (555)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*TOMBSTONE (555)            4   1  0 80.0   1/ 1 LAND OF OZ (217)         13  2 0
 2/ 2 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   250 151 20 62.3   2/ 4 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)   9  5 0
 3/ 8*FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)     19  12  3 61.3   3/ 6*FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)     8  5 1
 4/ 4 SPOONERTIKS (523)        102  65  7 61.1   4/ 5 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)    8  6 1
 5/ 1 OLD HABITS (566)          23  15  1 60.5   5/ 2 SKELETON KEY (493)        8  7 0
 6/ 3 ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)     38  25  4 60.3   6/ 9 COFFEE RULES! (505)       8  7 0
 7/ 7 LAND OF OZ (217)         422 279 13 60.2   7/ 3 OLD HABITS (566)          6  4 0
 8/ 9 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)   27  18  1 60.0   8/14 DARQUE FORCES (396)       6  9 0
 9/11 COFFEE RULES! (505)      120  94  5 56.1   9/ 7 ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)     6  9 0
10-10 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         573 455 30 55.7  10/16*NATURAL B. KILLERS (584)  5  4 3
11/12 LIFE'S LESSONS (562)      88  74  5 54.3  11- 8 DUR EDHEL (579)           5  5 1
12/14 NEMESIS (32)             134 120 13 52.8  12/22 THE JESUITS (524)         5  5 0
13/13 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)     300 269 30 52.7  13/21*VINCERE AUT MORI (588)    5  5 0
14/ 0*RAT SALAD (577)           19  18  0 51.4  14/26 NEMESIS (32)              5  7 0
15/16 DARQUE FORCES (396)       84  81  5 50.9  15/15 KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)     5  9 1
16/20*NATURAL B. KILLERS (584)  14  14  3 50.0  16/11 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)      5  9 0
17/ 6*VINCERE AUT MORI (588)     5   5  0 50.0  17/ 0*TOMBSTONE (555)           4  1 0
18-19*CYNICAL DELUSIONS (586)    2   2  0 50.0  18/18 LIFE'S LESSONS (562)      4  5 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/17 SKELETON KEY (493)        75  76  3 49.7  19/23 TREBORS (232)             4  5 0
20/21 BLACK STORM (171)         56  63  8 47.1  20/17 BLACK STORM (171)         4  5 0
21/22 SECOND BANANAS (573)      24  30  2 44.4  21-10 ROYAL FLUSH (48)          4  6 0
22/23 THE JESUITS (524)         59  76 12 43.7  22/20*SOULFORGE (587)           3  7 2
23/24 TREBORS (232)             79 106  8 42.7  23/12 SPOONERTIKS (523)         3  9 0
24/ 0 KELLY'S HEROES (202)      27  37  5 42.2  24/13 SECOND BANANAS (573)      3 12 1
25/26 KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)     24  34  2 41.4  25-24*CYNICAL DELUSIONS (586)   2  2 0
26-25 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    98 148  2 39.8  26/ 0*RAT SALAD (577)           2  3 0
27-27 DUR EDHEL (579)           17  33  2 34.0  27-19 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)    2  5 0
28/ 5*SOULFORGE (587)            3   7  2 30.0  28/29 AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)     1  1 0
29/29 AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)     11  28  0 28.2  29/27 MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)     1  1 0
30/30 MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)      8  30  0 21.1  30/ 0*ADULT SWIM (589)          1  4 0
31/ 0*ADULT SWIM (589)           1   4  0 20.0  31/ 0 KELLY'S HEROES (202)      0  2 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

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                                 The Quest of Hammer
                                      by Hammer

gladiators who had assembled themselves together for an audience with the Veteran
Manager in their new guild house in North Fork Arena.
     The Ripper known as HAWKEYE HAMMER had been an experimental disappointment in
many respects, but Hammer was willing to give the underachieving gladiator one more
shot at glory in North Fork Arena before transferring his AVENGERZ HAMMERZ stable to
DM 73 to make room for a permanent stable in DM 47 that suited the Veteran Manager's
purposes for the coming New Year!
     "You have served me well," stated Hammer to the battle worn Ripper who stood
before him with the greatest of respect, "and you shall continue to do so for as long
as you manage to survive the rigors of the arena!"
     Tears welled up in the eyes of the Ripper as Hammer explained that the newcomers
were to begin fighting in North Fork the first cycle of the coming New Year; whereas,
should HAWKEYE HAMMER manage to survive yet another bout on the sands of DM 47, the
Ripper would then migrate with his teammates to the Free Blades Slow Transfer Arena
known as Erinika to continue his career until Graduation or Death claimed his life!
     Hammer fixed his gaze upon the five Red Eyed/Green Haired Karragit Swamp
Dwellers that were assembled before him.
     "You shall be known to all in North Fork as ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ for it suits my
purpose well to enlist you five to aid me in my Quest to Graduate at least one of
every Style Master from among my famed stables!" declared the Veteran Manager.
     "Now that you have broken the silence," continued Hammer unfazed by the
suppressed giggles rippling throughout the guild house, "it is only fitting to
register you with the Gladiatorial Commission as SWAMP BURPS HAMMER in honor of your
Male tendency to assert yourself in public thusly!"
     "Thank you [BURP!] sir! It is a Great Honor Indeed to [BURP!] serve you in your
[BURP!] Quest, sir!"
     Hammer nodded as his gaze fell upon the shapely form of an attractive Karragit
Swamp Dweller who continually blushed as she stood before the famous Hammer.
     "Such beauty in contrast to the testosterone of your team captain," Hammer
stated matter of factly, "you shall be known as SWAMP ROSE HAMMER, my lovely!"
     "Why thank you ever so kindly sir," she blushed a deeper Crimson for all to
notice her loveliness, "I shall try my best to serve you in your Quest, sir!"
     "Team [BURP!] Captain?  [BURP!] Me?"
     Hammer nodded again in the direction of the newly anointed team captain.
     "What a [BURP!] honor, sir!  Thank [BURP!] you, sir!"
     Hammer grinned as he motioned to the other brooding Karragit Swamp Dweller Male
who bristled at the thought of being passed over for the team captaincy.
     "As you all well know," answered Hammer to the unspoken questions of the
bristling brooding gladiator, "I am launching a Quest for the coming New Year and
you, my friend, are an important part of the fulfillment of my Quest!"
     The brooding bristling gladiator arched an eyebrow in response.
     "I have but three Style Masters to Graduate to accomplish the feat of Graduating
at least one of every Style Master from among my countless stables throughout
Alastari," Hammer continued as he pointed to each of the three remaining Karragit
Swamp Dwellers, "and you my friends may very well be the fulfillment of my Quest
before I consider retiring from the managerial mayhem in this realm!"
     The three remaining gladiators shifted uneasily under the gaze of Hammer.
     Returning his attention to the bristling brooding gladiator, Hammer fixed his
eyes upon him with a stare that drilled its way to the very core of the gladiator's
     "Your Style is the one I have come closest to graduating," stated Hammer with a
far away look in his eyes, "but Death has claimed your fallen comrades of the art in
a most heart wrenching way!  You must find a way to claw your way to graduation!
Therefore, you shall be known in North Fork as SWAMP CLAW HAMMER, my friend!"
     "As you wish, sir," brooded the gladiator as the importance of the Quest of
Hammer began sinking deeper into his psyche.  "I will do my best, sir!"
     "The three of you must understand," continued Hammer as he paced the floor in
deepest thought, "that others of your like Styles have been activated in other arenas
to aid me in my Quest to Graduate All Ten Styles before I Retire...If Ever I Retire!"
     Hammer stopped his pacing as he stood before yet another lovely flower in his
newly assembled stable.
     "I have not had much success with your particular Style as well," Hammer
admitted as the female shivered under the Veteran Manager's gaze, "which is why I
have hand picked another Flower in another arena to aid me in my Quest for the New
Year in case Death claims the Chosen One who is already active elsewhere."
     "You are such a lovely flower of gladiatorial potential," continued Hammer as he
licked his lips in anticipation of the Quest fulfilled, "so it is only fitting to
register you with the Gladiatorial Commission as SWAMP LILY HAMMER to represent me in
my Quest in North Fork Arena!"
     "My desire is to serve you and fulfill your Quest, sir!"
     Hammer smiled warmly as he directed his attention to the final Karragit Swamp
Dweller who winked with a mischievously wicked smile all her own.
     "What would my stables be without an experiment," questioned Hammer to no one in
particular, "and who better to serve as that experiment than you, my dear?"
     The deliciously attractive female gestured playfully as she slowly moved her
body in time to the beat of an unheard siren song.
     "You will do perfectly my dear in spite of my history of having Death claim your
Style in one form or another," stated Hammer with an eye of indifference to the
seductive sway of the sensuous female writhing before him.  "You shall be known in
the Gladiatorial Commission Registry for North Fork as SWAMP TRAP HAMMER due to the
Dance of Death beating in your breast!"
     "Whatever you say, sir," breathed the hot blooded female in a huskiness that
drew men to her like moths are drawn to the flame.  "It will be an honor to serve you
in whatever manner you desire, sir!"
     Hammer eyed her evenly until the brazen beauty turned away from the fire blazing
within the Veteran Manager who was consumed by his Quest for the coming New Year!
     "I have others of your Style active as well in other arenas," cautioned Hammer
as the brazen beauty ran the tip of her tongue slowly across her upper lip.
"Seemingly better equipped warriors of your Style have fallen to Death's Crushing
Blow over the years!"
     The brazen beauty swayed her body in answer to Hammer's words.
     "But the uniqueness of your creation may very well propel you in time to
fulfilling the goal of Graduating your Style in my Quest for the coming New Year!"
     Hammer turned his attention once again to the all but forgotten HAWKEYE HAMMER
who was discreetly studying each of the new recruits who would be replacing AVENGERZ
HAMMERZ the first cycle of the coming New Year.
     The Ripper instinctively knew what Hammer was requiring next!
     Hammer had deliberately and purposely chosen North Fork as the Ultimate Stage
upon which to succeed in his Quest; not only in the presence of his Vendetta Cartel
alliance mates, but also by Matching Wits and Crossing Blades with the likes of Crip,
Oz, Drake, Mr Coffee and in her very own unique way Jorja; Veteran Managers who had
helped to shape and define the competition in DM 47 in recent years.
     Toss into the mix Baphomet [plus the other assorted gang of misfits and idiots
running rampant in North Fork during the recent Turf War battles!] and it was plain
to see that the Quest of Hammer for Graduating the Remaining 3 Styles from the ranks
of his newly formed ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ stable was a Challenge of Epic Proportions!
     HAWKEYE HAMMER had but one remaining cycle to do his part to aid Hammer in
helping to train and season these new recruits to fulfill their part in the Quest of
Hammer; before being banished to Erinika Arena in DM 73, Unless Death Claimed the
Hammer Ripper During His Final Act in North Fork Arena!


     SWAMP BURP HAMMER marched into the ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ new guild house to the beat
of his own unique drummer cadence
     He was seeking the still-brooding, still-bristling Karragit Swamp Dweller who
Hammer had passed over to anoint SWAMP BURP HAMMER as the Team Captain of the Veteran
Manager's newly formed ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ, who were due to debut on the North Fork
sands next cycle.
     Ignoring the seductive sway of the brazen beauty SWAMP TRAP HAMMER, the newly
anointed Team Captain of ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ side stepped the experimental warrior as
if she had no influence upon his testosterone levels.
     He merely motioned for her and her stable mates SWAMP ROSE HAMMER and SWAMP LILY
HAMMER to follow him to the VC Council Chamber in their quarters.
     Inside the well lit room they found SWAMP CLAW HAMMER studying the various
parchments and maps that promised to unlock the dark secrets of North Fork's
     SCH glowered at his team mates for the unexpected interruption.
     "As you may well have [BURP!] heard," began SWAMP BURP HAMMER as the ladies made
themselves comfortable in various positions around the room, "we have arrived in
[BURP!] North Fork just in time to [BURP!] compete in [BURP!] Baphomet's TW4 [BURP!]
contest as Hammer's newest North Fork Arena stable!"
     SWAMP CLAW HAMMER continued to bristle, brood and glower as he picked up a newly
deposited parchment containing the TW4 rules and regulations, waving it wildly!
     "Yeah, I Heard!"
     "What you may not have [BURP!] heard," continued SBH as the ladies giggled and
jiggled during the testosterone exchange, "is that I have [BURP!] registered [BURP!]
our own [BURP!] SWAMP CLAW HAMMER as our [BURP!] Champion!"

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

     Ever see someone go postal?  Here we are in a freakin contest and someone
decides not to print our major source of news.  Okay, it's slanted, twisted and maybe
a little biased.  But...someone's gotta do it.  Otherwise, The Swamp would dry up and
become desert.
     Well, I guess it doesn't matter as this is my last issue of the North Fork
Yellow Rag.  Turf War 3 has ended.  And, we're a bit disappointed, but not surprised
that The Fellowship of the SCOMSS won.  Disappointed only because it wasn't us.
Howsomever, we are good sports and wish a heartfelt congratulations to Slugbait,
Crip, Oz, Mannequin, Soultaker and Spawn.
     Now, for a bit of news....

     Turf War 4 will commence on Turn 225, right here in North Fork.  We'll run until
Turn 237.  The host will be...none other than...me.
     I've placed an all-arena ad with rules, scoring, etc.  I'll be beginning to post
them on T224.
     **Notable Note** -- Due to the Turf War 4 beginning so quickly, I'll run scores
for teams and alliances posted on T225, and Turn 226.  After that, you will have to
wait a turn to receive scores for your team.

     Okay...now on to my awards:

Host With The Most -- Asmo Dius!  Congrats my friend on an extraordinary job of
running the Turf War!

Most Confused Manager -- Barnabas of Feathers Flying.  He dont' seem to know where he
is or what he's doing!

Most Verbose -- Oz, naturally. (grin!)  Always a pleasure reading his p-ads.
Sometimes...they're even funny!

Angriest Manager -- Myself!  My spots and p-ads didn't get printed!

Welcome Wagon -- To Toker and Wasby.  You're a little late for TW3 and just a tad
early for TW4.  Stick around.

     Well folks...there ya have it.  Just remember...it ain't personal, just

Baphomet, TCB

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        *          *          *  TW3 #10...The End!  *          *          *

     Well folks, it's over...so here are the results.

A*  The highest scoring alliance was...SCOMSS!  So they'll be able to rename North
Fork for six months, and there are 15 rollup certs on the way to their leader, Oz the

B*  Two alliances tied for the most DA returns:  SCOMSS once again, and Beverages,
Inc.  There is one rollup cert going to each Oz and Mr. Coffee, and the two alliances
will split the DA monsters to be renamed (for six months).

C*  SCOMSS also had the most Awards/Honors, so they'll get four more rollup certs!
(Remember, this prize was changed.)

D*  The Vendetta Cartel had the most stylemasters, so will name the arena to host the
April '05 Grand Tournament and will receive three rollup certs.

E*  The Vendetta Cartel had to most kills too, so will have the honor of renaming the
arena stand-ins (for six months).  And they'll receive three more rollup certs.

     Now, the team awards...we'll start with the Mr. Coffee awards:

     *          *          *  Highest W/L/K, Team:  *               *          *

1)  Land of Oz                         36-13-1
2)  All-Star Nana's                    32-17-3
3)  Mystic Orc Feast                   30-20-3
4)  Coffee Rules!                      24-25-2
5)  Second Bananas                     23-26-1
6)  Skeleton Key                       21-29-1
7)  Dur Edhel                          17-33-1
     So, Oz will receive five MORE rollup certs!

F*  The highest scoring team was...Land of Oz.  Again...so that's three more rollup
certs to add to their pile!

G*  The team with the most stylemasters was The Bear's Paw -- hey, that's not SCOMSS!
Anyhow, Kat gets to discover the Faves for one warrior.

H*  The Bear's Paw also had the most Awards/Honors of all the teams, so will get one
free entry in the next Grand Touranment, which equates to $7.00 transferred from my

I*  Kat also had the most kills, so Bear's Paw also gets their rollup cert refunded!

     Now, the Mr. Coffee awards, with Mr. Coffee once again coming in first:

*          *          *  Most Kills, warrior:  Leviathan of Lard
     So, Mr. Coffe, I believe you owe Slugbait a free turn?  (If I remember

J*  The Warrior with the highest score was Hourglass -- another prize for Oz...she
fights free five turns, which means I'll transfer $7.50 to Oz's account.

K*  Bear Acuda had the most stylemaster listings and will also fight free for five
turns.  Kat can expect the $7.50 to be transferred soon.

L*  Lastly, our Arenamaster's new name for the next six months will be Oz the Great,
as his warrior had the most awards.

     So, the certs will be sent as follows:
Oz:  28                    Kat:  7                    Mr. Coffee: 1
for a total of 36 (31 entry certs + 5 from Mr. Coffee).

     So, the contest is over...I will not be doing a TW4, but Baphomet has expressed
interest in doing so.  If anyone is interested in their team's warrior's scores,
contact me by diplo in DM 73.  I will keep my records for the first three months of
2005, then trash 'em.  I was going to list them all, but thought I'd give the typist
a break...if you want individual scores I'll send 'em by diplo or snail at your
     See y'all in Erinika!

                                                  Asmo Dius, TCB

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     I am so surprised and humbled to have made it to this epitome', the top spot in
North Fork.  Never did I think I had what it took to be Duelmaster.  Admittedly, I
have worked hard, and I am sure that Oz applied a little magic, but to be here is
beyond my wildest dreams.  I will do my best to be deserving of the honor.
     My very first fight in the arena was a loss (naturally) to Osloben Benboben, and
by the time I was ready for my first tournament, I was a mediocre 6-5-1.  By the end
of my second tournament, I was mired in mediocrity with a 9-7-1 in the arena with a
3-6-0 in tournaments.  Oz said, "Work hard and be patient.  HAVE COURAGE!"  It was
great advice, I guess.  Somehow, I have won my last four in a row--over great
warriors like Paula Bones, Leviathon Of Lard, Jenna, and The Fisher King, all
different styles, and have been honored with this lofty position.
     Perhaps having the added excitement and challenge of performing for The
Fellowship Of The SCOMSS added to my conviction and focus.  Partnering with teams led
by some of the best managers in Alastari (Crip, Slugbait, Soultaker, Spawn,
Mannequin) certainly made me want to do my best--not just for Oz and myself, but for
The Fellowship.  I am proud to call myself a SCOMSSer and a Duelmaster.  I am,
     North Fork is a great arena.  Quiet, but fierce competition.  Honor amongst
competitors.  A willingness to help all who enter the gates.  International flavor.
All consistently held together by the presences of Royal Flush and Crip over all
these years.  I want to thank Mr. Crip for his dedication to North Fork all these
years.  I must admit that when I think of North Fork, I first think of Royal Flush.
I suspect that The Great And Wonderful Oz has tried to emulate The Flush and its
leader for many years.
     But the arena is far from being only a Royal Flush home.  I could mention them,
but without listing everyone, I would be missing what makes North Fork special.  I
know Oz has a special affinity for Mystic Orc Feast and a great respect for The
Bear's Paw.  Nevertheless, every team in North Fork should take a bow for making it
one of the best and best known arenas in Alastari.
     It will be difficult for me to retain this throne.  There are many warriors in
range as good as, if not better, than me.  I am particularly thankful that I do not
have to face either Rainbow or Hourglass, as they regularly "take me to the cleaners"
in practice.  I do speak with courage, however, that no matter who I fight, they will
receive a battle worthy of a Duelmaster.  Give it your best if you challenge me, for
I shall be doing the same.
                   Courage, Proud Duelmaster Of North Fork

                                      SPY REPORT

     Hail and well met warriors of SCOMSS SWAMP!  Know me for who I am, Zontani Sharp 
Eyes, Spymaster extraordinaire of all Alastari.  The proverbial rising comet can only 
hope to compare with NEMESIS' team record!  A 3-2-0 week and now a firm grasp on a 
14th place ranking.  SPOONERTIKS bore the brunt of major assault on their standings 
this week as they dropped to 23rd position as the result of going 0-2-0!  My tutors 
were fond of telling me that the higher you rise the harder you fall.  This week 
SECOND BANANAS went 1-4-0 and fell 11 notches into 24th!  Did only my eyes note the 
4-1-0 record which FEATHERS FLYIN' managed to post this round?  I don't doubt that 
such a record will draw challengers!  I could not but notice the fine record for 
TOMBSTONE (4-1-0) after their first round of combat.  May the gods of war favor you 
in SCOMSS SWAMP!  LITTLE BIG MAN caught the eye of many in the gladiatorial 
commission as he skillfully bested THE INFINITE and was awarded 22 points in 
recognition.  In one of the week's more notable duels, SARA F. put down CORPULENT 
CORPSE, causing her to lose 15 points of recognition in the process.  Who here was 
not present for the title fight this week as KALYPSO boldly challenged COURAGE in 
order to strive for the Duelmasters honors?  Although KALYPSO made a valiant effort, 
it did not suffice to topple the reign of victorious COURAGE.  Would you believe that 
over half of the old women in SCOMSS SWAMP seem to feel that they could fight better 
than you gladiators?   
     But come now, let us look deeper into the maze of contention and crossed blades 
that is city SCOMSS SWAMP.  SCOMSS SWAMP, city of gladiators!  Mighty among the names 
of thy guilds is SKELETON KEY, a guild shunned and avoided by many in the weekly 
duels.  Methinks more than a few here could name the guild it was that spent the 
better part of last week avoiding SKELETON KEY.  Indeed it was LAND OF OZ.  Mighty 
fighters cannot but expect competition from those below.  SCOTT take warning!  You 
have more than a few enemies in SCOMSS SWAMP.  At the gambling halls I have started 
to bet money on ART PENDRAGON.  He has got the courage it takes.  Witness his 
challenge this turn against DEEP FRIED LARD!  I must admit to some joy.  Before my 
very eyes the underdog in this contest, ART PENDRAGON, defeated DEEP FRIED LARD to 
claim victory and recognition.  I cannot but express pride for the fearlessness of 
GALDR who cast caution to the winds and challenged SISTER MARY SARAH, a fighter 27 
points higher.  Do not the gods reward courage?  GALDR it was that claimed victory in 
the bout, while also rising 28 points in recognition.  I can not but mention with 
disdain the name of IMMAZAEL who this week posted a challenge to a warrior a full 13 
points below in the rankings.  I thought IMMAZAEL showed great skill and promise when 
she was subdued by THE KURGEN.  All right, so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     Is not Death a warrior's foremost adviser?   Warriors, may this counselor stand 
ready at your right hand forever!  Some guilds are strict but few are as heartless as 
SECOND BANANAS.  Witness, last turn they sent BURNS, a 7-3-1 fighter, to the Dark 
Arena!  Fate is a fickle mistress.  She showers the miserable with fortune but sets 
enemies against the victorious.  Remember this!   
     The girls are as pretty in SCOMSS SWAMP as ever I remembered them....and the 
fighters as ugly!  Don't let your reputation slip!  Ahh, but I can hear the spires of 
a far off city calling to me.  I must away!  Till next we meet remember:  a fool 
flies into a rage quickly and often.  The wise are angered by the same thing only 
once.  Zontani Sharp Eyes  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 COURAGE 4552                 16  10  1   129       LAND OF OZ (217)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 RAINBOW 4553                 18   9  0   114       LAND OF OZ (217)
 LEVIATHAN OF LARD 5113       13   5  2   112       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
-GREGOLA 5101                 21  13  0   111       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 HOURGLASS 5127               14   2  0   107       LAND OF OZ (217)
-FOLMOR GRIGG 4501            21  33  0   100       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
 ART PENDRAGON 5151            8   6  0    99       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 DEEP FRIED LARD 4975         18   8  0    98       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 OSLOBEN BENBOBEN 4561        14  12  1    97       SKELETON KEY (493)
 JABBERWOCK 1277              13  12  3    96       NEMESIS (32)
 SHELDON 4111                 10   3  2    92       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KALYPSO 3603                 19  14  0    86       DARQUE FORCES (396)
 SPAWING OF SPEWN 5197         8   2  0    77       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 PAULA BONES 4414             17  13  1    73       SKELETON KEY (493)
 FIGHTING TREE 5235            7   4  0    71       LAND OF OZ (217)
 IVAN POISY 5112               9   9  0    67       SPOONERTIKS (523)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 STING 2724                   12   7  0    66       NEMESIS (32)
 JENNA 5099                   11   8  3    66       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 SARA F. 5349                  5   1  0    65       SKELETON KEY (493)
 LEPPADA 2257                 13  19  0    58       TREBORS (232)
 BEAR NEKKID 5126              9   7  0    57       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 ANJE 4109                     9   4  0    57       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WYRD 5167                     7   3  0    56       THE JESUITS (524)
 GALDR 5171                    5   4  1    56       THE JESUITS (524)
-ACE METRIC 3554               4   4  0    56       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 HUMBUG 5199                   8   4  1    54       LAND OF OZ (217)
-TEN C-0 METER 5141            7   5  0    54       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 MARAJUANA MAN 3411            7   4  2    51       BLACK STORM (171)
 SIR GALAHAD 5148              7   6  0    49       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 DASTER MARQUE 5196            6   4  0    49       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 AMELA BUNDERSON 5339          5   2  0    49       SKELETON KEY (493)
 SISTER MARY SARAH 5137        8   2  0    48       OLD HABITS (566)
 ZOMBIE KNIGHT 3564            8   1  0    46       BLACK STORM (171)
 SWEET N LOW 5306              5   3  0    46       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 PAUL BEARER 5187              6   6  2    45       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 CORPULENT CORPSE 5250         7   4  0    44       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 GREEDY 5223                   5   2  0    44       RAT SALAD (577)
 DRASTARDY DAKE 5198           5   5  0    43       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 DONAVAN 4112                  8   5  0    42       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
 CRISTER MOFFEE 5289           6   3  1    42       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 BABY 5224                     6   2  0    42       RAT SALAD (577)
-RONDOL QUIGLO 4978            8  17  0    41       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)
-HELLUIN 5237                  3   7  0    39       DUR EDHEL (579)
 MAHARA 2656                   9  10  1    38       TREBORS (232)
 KOZYTA 2640                   8  11  2    37       TREBORS (232)
 CURSESHOCK 5234               6   4  0    36       DARQUE FORCES (396)
 KRAMER 5191                   5   5  0    36       SECOND BANANAS (573)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FAT-BOY 5221                  5   2  0    34       RAT SALAD (577)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-HUSTLER 1765                  3   4  3    33       KELLY'S HEROES (202)
 SISTER MARY CLARENCE 5262     4   3  0    31       OLD HABITS (566)
 B.B. CROSS 5323               5   2  1    30       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 MINOR BLUE 5326               5   2  1    30       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 AHURA MAZDA 5152              3   8  1    30       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 LEET STREEGLE 5368            2   0  0    30       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 SISTER MARY ELEPHANT 5219     5   4  1    29       OLD HABITS (566)
 DISIR 5168                    5   4  1    29       THE JESUITS (524)
 DEVOUT CHRISTIAN 5321         4   2  1    29       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 KATIE 5337                    4   3  0    29       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
-YLW JACKET HAMMER 5329        2   0  0    29       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 COWBOY 1545                   6   8  0    28       KELLY'S HEROES (202)
-ELDHWEN 5236                  5   5  0    28       DUR EDHEL (579)
 A.D. 5305                     6   2  0    27       SPOONERTIKS (523)
 FREEZE DRIED 5308             5   3  0    26       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 GANGSTA CREEP 5391            2   0  0    26       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
-JACK & JILL 5310              4   2  0    25       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 HAWKEYE HAMMER 5061           3   8  0    25       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 APPIUS 5392                   2   0  0    25       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
-NIN QUIRE 5281                4   5  0    24       THE MIDDLE WAY 3 (506)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LITTLE BIG MAN 5393           1   0  1    22       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 JAY 5327                      4   3  1    21       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 GET THE POINT? 5097           3   6  0    21       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
-SISTER SLEDGE 5341            2   1  0    21       OLD HABITS (566)
 CLINTONLIKESBUSH 5318         4   2  0    20       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 WHITE SETTLER 5322            2   4  1    20       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 ETIENNE DUPLAIX 5377          2   0  1    20       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
-CARCHAROTH 5353               1   3  0    20       DUR EDHEL (579)
 MULLIGAN 1718                 5   4  0    19       KELLY'S HEROES (202)
 SCOTT 5299                    5   4  0    19       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
 FRED BEAR 5348                3   3  0    18       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 GAFF 5347                     3   0  0    18       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 MORGAN 5055                   1   0  0    18       TOMBSTONE (555)
 CAFE AU LAIT 5344             3   3  0    17       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 KENSAI 5267                   2   4  0    17       RAT SALAD (577)
 MR. REE 5406                  1   0  0    17       DARQUE FORCES (396)
 MELON MUSH 5357               3   2  0    16       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 RINGO 5056                    1   0  0    15       TOMBSTONE (555)
 HALLE BEARY 5312              2   6  0    14       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 MIDGUARD 5410                 1   0  0    14       THE JESUITS (524)
 THE KURGEN 5375               1   1  0    14       NEMESIS (32)
-NASTA 5297                    2   6  1    13       DUR EDHEL (579)
-MARRED TEENY 5291             1   3  0    13       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
-BABBRA 1866                   3   2  1    12       KELLY'S HEROES (202)
 TITANIA 2958                  2   6  0    12       NEMESIS (32)
 MATTIE 5058                   1   0  0    11       TOMBSTONE (555)
 BEAR SKINRUG 5399             1   0  0    10       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 BLACK THUNDER 3885            2   3  0     9       BLACK STORM (171)
-TOUCH OF STONE 5362           1   0  0     9       CYNICAL DELUSIONS (586)
-ITHILNAUR 5354                2   2  0     8       DUR EDHEL (579)
 EVICSERATOR 5358              2   1  0     7       BLACK STORM (171)
-SHE HULK HAMMER 5328          2   0  0     7       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
-SMOKED 5361                   1   0  0     7       CYNICAL DELUSIONS (586)
 FAMILY GUY 5398               0   1  0     7       ADULT SWIM (589)
 VASH THE STAMPEDE 5396        0   1  0     7       ADULT SWIM (589)
-STEEL RAIN 2180               1   3  0     6       KELLY'S HEROES (202)
 DOC 5059                      1   0  0     6       TOMBSTONE (555)
-DON KING 5374                 0   2  0     6       ROYAL FLUSH (48)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 IMMAZAEL 5384                 1   1  1     5       SOULFORGE (587)
 CULONEGRO 5387                1   1  1     5       SOULFORGE (587)
 FASTDRAW 5315                 1   2  0     5       RAT SALAD (577)
 ROBUST BREW 5400              1   0  0     5       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 BENDER 5395                   1   0  0     5       ADULT SWIM (589)
 WOODY 5412                    1   0  0     5       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 CASIEA 5389                   1   1  0     4       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
 GRENDEL 5376                  1   1  0     4       NEMESIS (32)
-3 MI. ISLE COFFEE 5334        0   1  0     3       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
 TRESSA 5388                   0   2  0     2       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
 CAPPUCCINO 5382               0   2  0     2       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 PICUS 5390                    0   2  0     2       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
-WASP HAMMER 5330              0   2  0     2       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 AMALRIC 5378                  0   2  0     2       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
-FALCON HAMMER 5331            0   2  0     2       AVENGER HAMMERZ (556)
 SKIPPY 5411                   0   1  0     1       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 AMAZON JANE 5414              0   1  0     1       SOULFORGE (587)
 FAYE VALENTINE 5397           0   1  0     1       ADULT SWIM (589)
-DAMING FLRAMBUIE 5335         0   1  0     1       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)
 WYATT 5057                    0   1  0     1       TOMBSTONE (555)
-LID BUTE 5333                 0   1  0     1       MIXED-UP MIXERS (558)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
TENCHI MUYO 5394       0  1 0 ADULT SWIM 589        BANDIT PRINCE 25      219 NONE    
VERITAS 5379           0  1 0 BLACK STORM 171       CULONEGRO 5387        218         
TWEEDLE DUMB 5373      1  2 0 DARQUE FORCES 396     DARK CHAMPION 24      219 NONE    
BUBBLES 5407           0  1 0 DARQUE FORCES 396     SHEWISH GIANT 21      219 NONE    
WITCHCRAZE 5201        5  3 1 DARQUE FORCES 396     SHELDON 4111          216         
ICEWRAITH 5346         0  2 0 DARQUE FORCES 396     JAY 5327              216 REVENGED
KELSO 5324             2  4 0 FEATHERS FLYIN' 585   WHITE SETTLER 5322    219         
RAGNAROK 5169          4  6 1 THE JESUITS 524       MOUNTAIN TROLL 18     219 NONE    
THE FISHER KING 5104  15 18 1 LIFE'S LESSONS 562    LEVIATHAN OF LAR 5113 218         
PELLA REES 5280        1  7 0 THE MIDDLE WAY 3 506  NASTA 5297            217         
MOTH LITE 5290         1  4 0 MIXED-UP MIXERS 558   STONE GOLEM 26        219 NONE    
SHORTLIFESPAN 5367     0  1 0 NATURAL B. KILLER 584 BANDIT PRINCE 25      219 NONE    
CHRIS COLUMBUS 5319    1  2 0 NATURAL B. KILLER 584 B.B. CROSS 5323       215 REVENGED
GEORGE BUSH 5320       2  3 0 NATURAL B. KILLER 584 MINOR BLUE 5326       217         
KING CRAB 4983        12  9 0 ROYAL FLUSH 48        OSLOBEN BENBOBEN 4561 216         
BURNS 5190             7  4 1 SECOND BANANAS 573    BLACK ORC 20          219 NONE    
971315151015 5413      0  1 0 SECOND BANANAS 573    DARK CHAMPION 24      219 NONE    
DUDE DUKE 5314         4  4 0 SKELETON KEY 493      ARENAMASTER OKEL 23   219 NONE    
LAST ROACH 5386        0  2 0 SOULFORGE 587         DEVOUT CHRISTIAN 5321 219         
THE INFINITE 5383      1  1 0 SOULFORGE 587         LITTLE BIG MAN 5393   219         
BIG CREEPY 5385        0  1 0 SOULFORGE 587         ETIENNE DUPLAIX 5377  218         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Mr. Coffee -- It was more wishful thinking than anything.  And be wary of carnies
(that includes Carny), they have small hands. -- Master Darque

Oz the Ever-helpful -- Just wanted to say that I enjoyed your spot on the Consortium
Waste.  It's managers like you that make this game great!  Always willing to help a
newbie, and always insightful tips for those of us that aren't exactly rookies, but
neither are we veterans. -- Master Darque

Kramer -- What a surprise!  Oz said I had no chance in Hades at pulling that off.
Perhaps he is not the all-knowing wizard we thought? -- Fighting Tree

Osloben -- The key to your skeleton lies in the colors of the rainbow.  You have not
yet found your pot of gold at the end of it, but I may have found mine. -- Rainbow

Jenna -- Perhaps you thought your kill rate provided you with an advantage?  Perhaps,
after reading the Consortium Waste article, you felt you had a style advantage over
me?  Perhaps you saw me as a lot of free Swamp Fest points?  Well, now you know,
Honey, and The Fellowship is riding all those points you gave them all the way to the
bank.  Thank you. -- Hourglass

Amela Bunderson -- I am not a stodgy, easy tree to fell.  But you will learn. --
Fighting Tree

Paula Bones -- I thought you would turn that fight quickly, and I am lucky and
honored to have won.  You would have made a fine Duelmistress, but I will humbly
accept that title. -- Courage

Crip -- Great point gain!  Well done!  Way to eke out My Ozers and The Orcs for top
team on the move in the final round of the competition.  Salute. -- Oz The All-

Barnabas -- We welcome you with open arms to North Fork.  Do not let petty
discussions divert your pleasure and enjoyment.  North Fork (or whatever it will be
named for the next 6 months) is the place to be. -- Oz The All-Welcoming

Spawn -- You are too kind.  Thanks for the compliment on the Consortium Waste
article.  While I did contribute, the real "authors" are The Consortium originating
brothers--Fandil The Wise  of Fandils in DM46, Lenpro of Lenpros in DM30 and
Kennelworth of Bulldogs in DM11.  Mino of Animal Farm in DM20 (now DM11) was the
greatest contributor of warriors of that style. -- Oz The All-Acknowledging

Latte -- And thank you also.  I loved the way you phrased it "all the valuable
waste".  It was my chuckle of the day. -- Oz The All-Amused

Vendetta@United with Vincere Aut Mori (Toker) and Soul Forge (Wasby The Great) --
Welcome to North Fork.  You will find the competition fierce, but honorable.  Feel
free to call upon any of the elderly arena managers to help you out as you will find
that they are some of the most knowledgeable and helpful in all Alastari. -- Oz The
Welcome Wagon

Congratulation to Ace Bailey of Royal Flush -- North Fork's newest Lord protector. --
Oz The All-Praising

Fellowship Of The SCOMSS -- I am proud to have been associated with you all.  The
ring has been cast into the fires, and we depart friends before and friends after.
Until we are needed again.... -- Oz The All-Emotional

Rumor has it that the success of the Turf Wars is creating impatience by some to
start another as soon as T221, only a couple of turns down the road.  I would like to
advise that such a decision is too soon.  An additional "war" should not occur until
the winners of the last have time to savor the victory, which would seem to be upon
conclusion of the 6-month renaming of the arena.  I would suggest that the earliest
start be T225, or perhaps the turn following the summer Face.  All Ozers are
certainly in favor of continuing the fine, competitive, not-so-cut-throat,
competition of the Turf Wars, but truly believe there should be a reasonable spacing
between events. -- Oz The All-knowing

Melon -- Bet that's how you feel, bet you were surprised when you couldn't get the
attack. -- B.B.

Don -- Nice hair!!!  You know, I've never liked you. -- Minor

Katie -- Damn woman, slow down! -- Jay

Oz -- Got myself calmed down now so may the fun begin!  As noted in a previous ad,
just look at match-ups not at teams so I apologize to any if I seem to be picking on
any one!  Not my plan of attack, just trying to win! -- Tuff Stuff

Art Pendragon -- Oops.  Nice comeback.  It seems I overstepped myself although I'm
pretty sure you were a second challenge. -- Daster Marque

Sheldon -- Curses on you.  I am impressed though. -- Spawning

Corpulent Corpse -- Well, I guess thanks for the skills. -- Drastardly

Nasta -- Well fought and thanks for the skills. -- Crister

Ithilnaur -- It seems your team has saved mine from completely bombing.  Well fought.
-- Leet Streegle

Kat -- Be sure to announce the confirmation of my ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ in the new Turf
War sponsored by Baphomet, my friend! -- Hammer

***Baphomet*** -- ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ will be representing the Vendetta Cartel in your
newly sponsored Turf War in North Fork Arena! -- Hammer
P.S.  SWAMP CLAW HAMMER is to be registered as my Champion as well!
P.P.S.  I contacted RSI to transfer a New Team Roll Up Gift Cert from my account to
send to you in your DM 47 newsletter this month!  Let me know if you received it!

Toker and the United Vendetta Clones -- I have already stated the obvious in the
recent DM 59 P-ads and now I will be more specific!  Be It Known that you have now
entered an arena that many of us consider to be a home arena, albeit not our
individual Home Arenas as VC members other than Kat.  History has plainly revealed
that those fighting against Invaders of their collective homeland are fierce
fighters.  Furthermore you have made a BIG BLUNDER coming into North Fork and
shooting off your mouths in the manner that you have been doing.  I have endeavored
to overlook this customary trait of you and the other United Vendetta Clones the past
few cycles; however, you have finally stepped over a line from which there is no
turning back and no room for offering an apology!  Part of the fun of the game is
having friendly rivalries with other managers and alliances.  One of the surest ways
to decimate the ranks of a thriving arena is for an Alliance War to tear apart the
chemistry of a fun arena.  With my apologies to the Veteran Managers who I respect
and honor in this arena, WAR IS OFFICIALLY DECLARED upon you and Goat and all the
rest of your cohorts who failed to find an alliance name for yourselves and
deliberately cloned our alliance name and for many months have been throwing your
verbal garbage in our faces in the P-ads and Team Spotlights!  My W/L record for my
newly formed ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ is not my priority for running a stable here in North
Fork Arena.  What means less than nothing to me is my W/L record versus the United
Vendetta Clones.  Be it now known that long after you and your inmate-minded alliance
mates have tired of taunting me and decimating my stables from North Fork to Illis to
wherever we may cross blades in other arenas; you have made an enemy who will make
life miserable for you and the other United Vendetta Clones managers who will someday
tire of the retribution aimed their way with the constant hounding in the Team
Spotlights, P-ads and on the Sands!  The game will one day cease to be fun for you
and the other United Vendetta Clones and you can look back to this cycle in North
Fork where you were warned of the harvest that your foolishness has set into motion
for the New Year!  Enjoy the Turf War while you still find this game to be fun! --
Hammer/Vendetta Cartel Captain; WordSmith and WeaponSmith of the Vendetta Cartel
Tarantula Tribe in DM 28 [who has always considered North Fork to be a second home
where my experimental stables were always welcomed to participate by the regulars in
North Fork Arena no matter how they fared on the sands and who always petitioned me
to return!]
P.S.  If you think I am just blowing smoke your way Toker [PUN INTENDED] then just
ask Fizban about his debut in North Fork so many years ago!  He succeeded in Killing
two of my experimental warriors when he first arrived!  He made the mistake of
shooting off his mouth one too many times in the P-ads and I spent the rest of my
stay in North Fork with that Experimental Stable Teaching Him Proper Arena Etiquette.
He is now an alliance mate, thanks to the intercession of Master Darque, or we would
still be crossing blades years later!  Fizban was My Friendly Foe [even when I
retaliated with New Warriors in North Fork Arena who were NOT Experiments!]  You are

Baphomet -- Do I understand correctly that any Warrior who either TVs or TCs in the
April Mailer will have the multiples awarded to fights [both + and -]for the duration
of TW4? -- Hammer
P.S.  Also including the Summer Facer and Fall Mailer of course!  Obviously the Tempe
2005 Facer results do NOT count because the contest begins in February after the
January Tempe Facer!

Toker -- Hmm, not only are you of the Bizzarro Cartel but it seems you've angered the
usually friendly Hammer.  I understand you are new and are prone to trash talk.  I to
riled up Hammer when I first started first by Killing 2 of his warriors then gloating
about it.  Very normal for a newbie.  He came after me hard and I'll admit he won
more that he lost.  But more importantly than that he taught me a little respect in
game and now we are friends and alliance mates.  I come to you only to say this.  If
it's all in fun than maybe a quick personal to that effect is in order, if not and
you and you new pretender alliance want war, then just say so.  Remember though if
that's what you want, then bring it and bring it hard.  Learn fast.  'Cause you'll
need it.  If you don't believe me go ask COL who are all vets how well they have
fared against me in 31.  I take very little personally in this game.  Hell, I love
the contest and the wars. If you want some, all you need to do is step up.  Not only
will Hammer give you some but I'll toss in a little dessert. -- Fizban the Fanatic

Barnabas -- Hey dude, what up?  Glad to see you pop into the swamplands!  I notice
you've met my brother in arms, Maximillian!  I came here for the last turf war but
with these phony Vendetta's crawling through the jungles I figure I'd stick and stay
and root out the phonies.  Hope you stick around for a bit, don't let Oz get to you
he's all in good fun (part of The Consortium, like Kennelworth in Aruak is).  Hope
you find pleasure here and hope to hear from you from time to time (I moved so the
internet access is VERY spotty)! -- Street Legal, mgr. of Life's Lessons

Crister Moffee -- I take my coffee however I can get it. -- Amela Bunderson

Goat -- I was too late to join you in the contest, sorry.  Who are the new recruits?
Am I allowed to test their mettle?
P.S.  Put any of your teams you want to on the Manic Union roster.  We may as well
keep that alliance active for tourneys.

Titania -- My sensibilities are not all that delicate.  It's the commission's that
are. -- Sara Fister

Courage -- Lean on me. -- Poula

Sir Galahad -- Did I hit my favorite? -- Sara Fister
P.S.  Letter's in the mail next month.

V.@.U. -- Warriors of the Desolate Empire!  Look at all these established guilds.  We
might be a day late for the battle.  So let's stay for the war that is soon to come.
By the way, did we take the wrong road?  I have not seen any lights at Abraxis' or
Voo-doo's Guild house.  If you locate Phat Phat, put a dull arrow in his left
buttock!  Until our "Duke of the Free Blades" makes himself known, we shall fight
like rabid dogs infecting all with our ideals of V.@.U. of the Desolate Empire. --
Goat/"Hand of Death" for V.@.U. of North Fork

Fred Bear -- Are you related to Pooh? -- Disir, Barren Blade of the D.E.

All -- I am "Midguard", Barren Blade of the Desolate Empire.  Your demise is
intended. -- Midguard, Barren Blade of the D.E.

Donavan -- Your skills taught are great!  Good fight. -- Wyrd, Desolate Soldier of
the D.E.

Hawk Eye Hammer -- I'm sure that "brilliant twisting thrust" will leave a scar.  It
was earned on your part. -- Galdr, Barren Blade of The Desolate Empire

All -- Anyone interested in a bare knuckle contest open to all styles?  No armor
heavier than L/APL.  Has it been done yet? -- Goat/Hand of Death in North Fork

Latte, RIP --- A tough call that from the boss.  Maybe it will haunt him in the
future??!! -- Spawn

Sister Mary Elephant -- I'd say someone had tampered with that weapon.  Just as well
it didn't count towards the turf war.  I think I saw a Kat looking at your weapons
rack rather too closely before the bout!!! -- A.D.

Courage -- Salutations to our mighty DM.  Fitting that you should take the throne at
the end of the turf war, to display your dominance for all to see!! -- Spawn

Sister Mary Sarah -- Only two 'live' fights last turn, and both against your habits.
Sorry about that, the boss sent four challenges in, just the two chosen made it look
like he was picking on you!  Proud to have given you your first loss and to have got
myself back above 50%! -- Ivan P

Vendett@United -- Not a bad turn for us all.  Some wins, some kills, and some dirt in
a few eyes.  Let's keep it up. -- Wasby the Great

Black Storm -- Lo siento yo matanza Veritas, pero no puede competir para mi.  ?Que
guacho? -- Culonegro, Barrenblade

Ettiene Duplaix -- You killed a creep!  So shall his wrath be upon you! -- Soulforge,

Appuis -- Nice fight.  Maybe next time.  Anyway, you want some of this?  It's extra
sticky icky. -- Last Roach, Barrenblade

All -- The Soulforge family wishes you all a warm holiday season.  Here's hoping you
don't get a lump of coal under the tree and/or drive after drinking too much kool-
aid. -- Wasby the Great

Baphomet -- I declare vendett@UNITED for TW IV.  The following people may declare for
V@U:  Abraxis, Voodoo, Goat, Toker, Wasby, Skullagrim and Mr. Coffee. -- CFH/
vendett@UNITED -- Captain
P.S.  My team is Rat Salad and my champion will be Baby.

Mr. Coffee/Skully -- No idea what your intentions are for IV but would like to have
you on my side. -- CFH
P.S.  Trying to get some people who will be there from start to finish.

Amalric -- Lucky the Arenamaster stopped me.  I would loved to have finished it! --
Gangsta Creep -- Barren Blade

Evicserator -- You are a good warrior; hats off to you! -- Toker, Dark Knight of V@U
of The Desolate Empire

Last Roach -- Freak meeting, my brother.  You fought well. -- Appius -- Barren Blade

The Kurgen -- Good fight.  You lasted longer than expected! -- Casiea -- Barren Blade

Touch of Stone -- I will see you again.  Good fight though! -- Picus -- Barren Blade

Hammer -- Awaiting your down challenges! -- Dark Knight Toker, V@U of The Desolate

Goat -- Dok Sik should be here soon.  He's still on the road from Illis! -- Toker --
Dark Knight of V@U of The (D.E.)

Dark Knight -- Good showing last turn.  I'll send my warriors over for a lesson on
that killing stroke. -- Toker Dark Knight -- mgr. Vincere Aut Mori

Baphomet -- I upchallenged a lot of points to reach your warrior.  Let's see if it
goes through! -- Toker Dark Knight of V@U The Desolate Empire
P.S.  Big heads usually explode!

All -- I hope y'all can welcome me and my partners to your lovely city!  I see you've
been having a nice little shootout here already--obviously too late for me to join in
the fracas but I look forward to shaking things up a bit nonetheless! -- Big Nose
P.S.  Any style info assistance would be greatly appreciated!

All -- In the words of the great CARNY (I miss Carny), "We got a winner!"  Actually,
we've got two winners.  Congrats to Oz the All Managing and Slugbait's warrior
Leviathan of Lard. -- Mr. Coffee (Final say so on Coffee Awards)

Oz -- An amazing 73.5% W/L for the contest (36-13-1) puts you in first place.  Asmo
has your prize and I trust he'll send it promptly. -- Mr. Coffee/Coffee Rules!

Slugbait -- Leviathan of Lard's second kill and your impressive 100% participation in
the contest makes you the winner.  Letter to RSI transferring $7.50 (5 turns?) to
your account en route. -- Mr. Coffee/Coffee Rules!

All -- It seems Latte departed the Land of the Living.  He was a Wall of Steel,
14(1)-16(1)-8-15-5-12(1), not really my favorite warrior, but not my least favorite.
-- Mr. Coffee/Coffee Rules!

8 December 2004
Battle Royal 4
     The Battle Royal arena contests are one of the purest tests of manager skill
available. The rules are simple.  The scoring is simple.  The updates are live.  If
you would like to participate, simply get a team ready in Talcama in the next month
and announce in the personals that you're in.  The prize is bragging rights and
having your name along side previous winners (Doc Steele, Manray Frothingslosh, and
Manager).  It is a brutal contest, but it is a lot of fun!
     Basic rules:  No avoiding other contest teams.  Score = Wins + Kills - Losses.
Only fights against other BR teams count.  First team to 25 wins!
     BR4 begins in Talcama (DM 18) on turn 502, due on Jan 29, 2005.
     Visit http://www.geocities.com/assurnasir/br4 for more information.

8 December 2004
     The Turf War IV Grand Contest will commence on Turn 221 (approx. February 22,
2005).  For those who have never participated, Turf Wars are alliance-type contest
and Winner-Takes-All.  There are no 2nd place winners!
     Everyone may participate; known alliances, new alliances, or temporary alliances
created to compete in the Turf War!  However, to participate, each alliance must:
     A.  Announce the alliance name and the Captain of the alliance in the North Fork
         (DM #47) newsletter.
Captains are responsible for:
     A.  Verifying those who wish to participate under the banner of their alliance;
     B.  Distribution of prizes should their alliance win the TW4.
Managers must:
     A.  Submit one (1) RSI Roll-up Gift Certificate to participate;
     B.  Announce their intent to compete with manager name, team name and alliance
         in which they will be fighting under, in the DM #47 North Fork newsletter.
1.  No scoring will begin until an RSI Roll-up Gift Certificate is received.  No
    exceptions will be made.
2.  Before a manager can compete, he must be acknowledged and verified by the Captain
    of the alliance he has claimed for;
    A.  The following turn, points will begin to be awarded or subtracted;
3.  Only one (1) team per manager may compete.  No multiple aliases please (we'll be
    checking this and if caught...you'll be disqualified and no refund);
4.  The contest will end on Turn 233 (12 turns!).  Winners will be announced on Turn
    234 and prizes sent to winning alliance between Turn 233 and 234.
5.  No declarations will be acknowledged after Turn 231.
6.  For the purpose of scoring, I reserve the right to make all final decisions.
Scoring:         Win    Lose     Kill     Die
Challenge         +2     -2       +5       -5
Match-up          +1     -1       +1       -5
Bloodfeud         +2     -5       +5       -10
Champion          x2     x2       x2       x2
Downchallenge     +2     -5       +2       -10
Dark Arena       +10     -5       xx       xx
Special Scoring:
     A.  Each mention in the Spy Report is worth 5 points;
     B.  Each Style Master is worth 5 points;
     A.  Champions may be declared, but are not mandatory.  If declared, they must be
         in the Adepts or lower brackets.
     A.  Bloodfeuds will count for all four turns.  However, the same warrior may not
         bloodfeud all four turns.  A penalty of -10 will be given to the team who
         violates this rule.
Special Conditions:
     A.  I reserve the right for all final decisions.
     B.  If I make a mistake, I'll multiply the points by 2;
     C.  If you claim I did, and *YOU* are wrong; I'll subtract points at the rate of
     D.  Each alliance begins with zero (0) points.
     E.  Dark Arena may be used on the first turn of every warrior with no penalty.
     F.  T.V.'s won after contest begins gain a Triple rate of scoring.
     G.  T.C.'s won after the contest begins gain a multiple of 10 scoring.
     H.  No switching alliances once verified by an alliance.
     Any questions or concerns may be addressed (if you're incarcerated) to:
Baphomet, mgr. Knights Templar (268), DM #47 -- North Fork.
     If you're in the free world:  Rick Strigner  Merit East
                                   SCI  P.O. Box 500
                                   Georgetown, DE  19947-0500
P.S.  Prizes are:
     A.  100% of the roll-up certs
     B.  Currently under negotiations with R.S.I. for other prizes
     C.  A special prize from me that I will discuss with the Captain of the winning

15 December 2004
The Company of Brothers Alliance would like to welcome Azereth as our newest member.
We are sure he will be an asset to both our alliance and the dueling community! --
Baphomet, Co-Founder T.C.B.

24 December 2004
Due to requests, the Turf War IV will be postponed until turn 225 (approx May/June
2005).  Sorry about the inconvenience. -- Baphomet, host of TW 4

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

BURNS was butchered by BLACK ORC in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
DUDE DUKE was butchered by ARENAMASTER OKEL in a exciting 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
RAGNAROK was murdered by MOUNTAIN TROLL in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
MOTH LITE was dispatched by STONE GOLEM in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
TWEEDLE DUMB was butchered by DARK CHAMPION in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
SHORTLIFESPAN was assassinated by BANDIT PRINCE in a 1 minute Dark Arena match.
TENCHI MUYO was butchered by BANDIT PRINCE in a 2 minute Dark Arena brawl.
971315151015 was barely slain by DARK CHAMPION in a 2 minute Dark Arena fight.
BUBBLES was butchered by SHEWISH GIANT in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena match.
JENNA was handily defeated by LEVIATHAN OF LARD in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud fight.
CULONEGRO was vanquished by ETIENNE DUPLAIX in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud duel.
SARA F. overpowered CORPULENT CORPSE in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
OSLOBEN BENBOBEN was defeated by HOURGLASS in a 3 minute veteran's Challenge fight.
KALYPSO was overpowered by COURAGE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge Title match.
ART PENDRAGON viciously subdued DEEP FRIED LARD in a 4 minute Challenge battle.
JABBERWOCK handily defeated PAULA BONES in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge conflict.
WYRD was vanquished by SPAWING OF SPEWN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout.
FIGHTING TREE vanquished DASTER MARQUE in a 1 minute bloody one-sided Challenge fray.
PAUL BEARER was bested by ANJE in a 1 minute Challenge brawl.
DRASTARDY DAKE defeated KRAMER in a exciting 1 minute Challenge bout.
STING narrowly defeated BEAR NEKKID in a 11 minute brutal Challenge bout.
DISIR was savagely defeated by CRISTER MOFFEE in a 2 minute Challenge conflict.
GALDR overpowered SISTER MARY SARAH in a exciting 3 minute uneven Challenge fight.
CAFE AU LAIT overcame BLACK THUNDER in a action packed 3 minute Challenge duel.
MINOR BLUE devastated GET THE POINT? in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
LEET STREEGLE overpowered SCOTT in a 4 minute brutal uneven Challenge fight.
TRESSA was overpowered by JAY in a 1 minute gory one-sided Challenge duel.
PICUS was demolished by HAWKEYE HAMMER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
GANGSTA CREEP vanquished FRED BEAR in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fray.
GAFF overcame HALLE BEARY in a 1 minute Challenge bout.
AMALRIC was handily defeated by B.B. CROSS in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
IMMAZAEL was luckily beaten by THE KURGEN in a 3 minute beginner's Challenge fight.
RAINBOW overpowered CONVICTED ASSASSIN in a slow 5 minute one-sided match.
IVAN POISY was overpowered by SHELDON in a 1 minute gory one-sided bout.
MARAJUANA MAN viciously subdued FAT-BOY in a crowd pleasing 3 minute gruesome match.
SIR GALAHAD overpowered CLINTONLIKESBUSH in a exciting 4 minute one-sided struggle.
A.D. was savagely defeated by BABY in a popular 2 minute brutal fray.
DONAVAN was subdued by HUMBUG in a exciting 1 minute conflict.
ZOMBIE KNIGHT unbelievably bested KATIE in a popular 5 minute gruesome bout.
LEPPADA beat COWBOY in a exciting 1 minute competition.
KOZYTA was handily defeated by GREEDY in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
AMELA BUNDERSON overpowered SISTER MARY CLARENCE in a 1 minute uneven battle.
MAHARA was vanquished by SWEET N LOW in a 1 minute one-sided struggle.
CURSESHOCK overcame AHURA MAZDA in a crowd pleasing 3 minute duel.
SISTER MARY ELEPHANT defeated TITANIA in a exciting 2 minute brawl.
DEVOUT CHRISTIAN easily killed LAST ROACH in a exciting 1 minute mismatched melee.
WHITE SETTLER executed KELSO in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
FREEZE DRIED outlasted KENSAI in a popular 9 minute duel.
MULLIGAN was overpowered by APPIUS in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
MELON MUSH overcame SKIPPY in a 2 minute novice's duel.
FASTDRAW was demolished by MORGAN in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
EVICSERATOR was subdued by MR. REE in a popular 3 minute novice's battle.
GRENDEL was handily defeated by MIDGUARD in a 1 minute mismatched contest.
CAPPUCCINO was luckily beaten by DOC in a 4 minute novice's struggle.
THE INFINITE was murdered by LITTLE BIG MAN in a 1 minute one-sided brawl.
CASIEA was devastated by RINGO in a 1 minute one-sided match.
FAMILY GUY was bested by ROBUST BREW in a 1 minute novice's brawl.
MATTIE defeated VASH THE STAMPEDE in a 3 minute gory amateur's duel.
BENDER defeated AMAZON JANE in a 2 minute amateur's brawl.
FAYE VALENTINE was viciously subdued by WOODY in a 3 minute gory novice's bout.
WYATT was vanquished by BEAR SKINRUG in a 1 minute mismatched match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                 25         WALL OF STEEL     48 -  35 -  2      58  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                 17         PARRY-LUNGE       19 -  15 -  0      56  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  16         TOTAL PARRY      100 -  88 -  1      53  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     15         SLASHING ATTACK   60 -  55 -  7      52  |
|AIMED BLOW                      12         AIMED BLOW        50 -  50 -  2      50  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  11         LUNGING ATTACK    80 -  90 - 10      47  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    8         STRIKING ATTACK   88 - 110 -  8      44  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    5         PARRY-STRIKE      14 -  22 -  1      39  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     3         PARRY-RIPOSTE     14 -  23 -  0      38  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      0         BASHING ATTACK    59 -  97 -  4      38  |

Turn 219 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

WALL OF STEEL      5 -  3     STRIKING ATTACK   11 - 14         3  TOTAL PARRY    
PARRY-RIPOSTE      3 -  2     AIMED BLOW         5 -  7         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     6 -  5     TOTAL PARRY        6 -  9         3  WALL OF STEEL  
SLASHING ATTACK    9 -  8     BASHING ATTACK     6 - 10         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                              PARRY-STRIKE       1 -  2         1  BASHING ATTACK 
                              PARRY-LUNGE        0 -  0     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
SLASHING ATTACK  COURAGE 4552               16  10  1  129 LAND OF OZ (217)
TOTAL PARRY      RAINBOW 4553               18   9  0  114 LAND OF OZ (217)
WALL OF STEEL    HOURGLASS 5127             14   2  0  107 LAND OF OZ (217)
BASHING ATTACK   SHELDON 4111               10   3  2   92 ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
AIMED BLOW       PAULA BONES 4414           17  13  1   73 SKELETON KEY (493)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    BEAR NEKKID 5126            9   7  0   57 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is LEPPADA 2257.  The most popular warrior this turn 
was KENSAI 5267.  The ten other most popular fighters were KATIE 5337, MARAJUANA MAN 

The least popular fighter this week was RAINBOW 4553.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were SCOTT 5299, MATTIE 5058, WYATT 5057, VASH THE STAMPEDE 5396, CASIEA 
5389, THE INFINITE 5383, DOC 5059, GRENDEL 5376, EVICSERATOR 5358, and FASTDRAW 5315.

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:



     For those of you who keep track of such things, 11 additional warriors graduated 
from regular DM arenas (including closed arenas) since the last tournament.  

                        EEK THE CAT (2-4110) of THE FUNNY FARM 
                             HADES (11-5338) of MYTHICAL 
                    DRAUGHT DODGER (12-5209) of WISH YOU WERE BEER 
                      DRACO MALFOY (18-7115) of HOUSE SLYTHERIN 
                           FREAK (18-7300) of RUN AND HYDE 
                   BETWEEN THE EYES (60-716) of METAL MILITIA II 6
                  SHOVELING SANDY (65-3584) of STORMNITE SANDBAGGER 
                         BLUE BLOOD (73-3657) of BLACK & BLUE 
                          JOCK (82-10452) of 4-LETTER ITCHES 
                       WILLIE BROWN (82-13201) of 1976 RAIDERS 
                          YUENGLING (82-16265) of LOCAL BEER 

Congrats to the grads. -- Green Eyes

                                FACE-TO-FACE XXXIV

     Our next Winter Face-to-Face will be held on Martin Luther King weekend, Friday 
through Sunday, 14-16 January 2005, at the Embassy Suites in Tempe, Arizona (4400 S 
Rural Rd--this is the same hotel as last year).  Room rates are $139.00 per night, 
1-4 occupancy, which includes breakfast.  The rooms are blocked.  The reservations 
number is 480-897-7444; tell them you're with the "Reality Simulations Face to Face 
Convention" block.  Our room block will be released in mid-December, so please make 
sure you reserve your room before then! 
     Room rates include a full cooked-to-order breakfast and a complimentary two-hour 
manager's reception.  There is a free shuttle to the airport, as well as free parking.  
The hotel is located down the freeway in Tempe.  All rooms have high speed internet 
(for an extra charge).  There is a fitness center, jacuzzi, and pool, and of course a 
bar and Mexican restaurant inside the hotel.  And there's Denny's right across the 
street.  Look for transportation info in the tournament information sheet.
     The tournament information sheet/strategy sheet should be out sometime in late 
November/early December. 
     If you haven't been to a Face-to-Face before, you're overdue.  If you have, 
you'll be back.  Don't miss this one, it'll be a blast!  See you there! 

                                          -- Green Eyes and the RSI Staff

                 MAIL-IN TOURNEY XXXVIII

PRIMUS TOURNEY                         W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
KING PIN 282 (112-85-2)                1  4  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
KING KEY 281 (115-91-0)                0  5  0         ROYAL FLUSH          

ADM TOURNEY                            W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
GRINNON BEARIT 2955 (24-14-3)          0  2  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       

FRESHMEN TOURNEY                       W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
MARY ANN 4378 (16-25-0)                0  2  0         SCREEN DREAMS        

CHALLENGERS TOURNEY                    W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
SPAWN 4283 (9-7-0)                     2  3  0         FANTASTIC FIVE       
ACE BAILEY 4948 (13-13-0)              1  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
RAINBOW 4553 (15-9-0)                  1  3  0         LAND OF OZ           

CHAMPIONS TOURNEY                      W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
BEAR ACUDA 4995 (13-6-1)               6  3  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       
HOURGLASS 5127 (12-1-0)                4  3  0         LAND OF OZ           
COURAGE 4552 (13-10-1)                 2  3  0         LAND OF OZ           
STING 2724 (10-7-0)                    0  2  0         NEMESIS              

ADEPTS TOURNEY                         W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
AHURA MAZDA 5152 (3-5-1)               0  2  0         KNIGHTS TEMPLAR      
ART PENDRAGON 5151 (6-5-0)             0  2  0         KNIGHTS TEMPLAR      
BEAR NEKKID 5126 (8-5-0)               0  2  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       
PAUL BEARER 5187 (5-4-2)               0  2  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       
SIR GALAHAD 5148 (6-4-0)               0  2  0         KNIGHTS TEMPLAR      
SISTER MARY SARAH 5137 (7-0-0)         0  2  0         OLD HABITS           
STRYCHNINE 4838 (10-5-1)               0  2  0         PURE POISON          

INITIATES TOURNEY                      W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
SISTER MARY CLARENCE 5262 (2-2-0)      5  3  0         OLD HABITS           
ARAUTHATOR 4660 (3-1-0)                4  3  0         DRACONIC REALM       
SISTER SLEDGE 5341 (1-1-0)             4  3  0         OLD HABITS           
SPAWING OF SPEWN 5197 (6-1-0)          2  3  0         MANEGERIAL MAYHEM    
SISTER CHRISTIAN 5340 (2-0-0)          1  2  0  DEAD   OLD HABITS           
HALLE BEARY 5312 (2-3-0)               0  2  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       

APPRENTICES TOURNEY                    W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
SARA F. 5349 (2-1-0)                   8  3  0         SKELETON KEY         
CLINTONLIKESBUSH 5318 (3-1-0)          3  3  0         NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 
FRED BEAR 5348 (2-1-0)                 3  3  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       
WARFARIN 5231 (2-0-0)                  2  3  0         PURE POISON          
JACK & JILL 5310 (2-2-0)               0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
WHITE SETTLER 5322 (1-3-0)             0  2  0         NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 

ROOKIES TOURNEY                        W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
GREEN KNIGHT 5369 (0-0-0)              3  3  0  DEAD   KNIGHTS TEMPLAR      
LEET STREEGLE 5368 (0-0-0)             2  3  0         MANEGERIAL MAYHEM    
TARNELUS 5359 (0-0-0)                  2  3  1         CYNICAL DELUSIONS    
TOUCH OF STONE 5362 (0-0-0)            2  3  0         CYNICAL DELUSIONS    
DON KING 5374 (0-0-0)                  1  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          

DEAD CHALLENGERS TOURNEY               W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
ACE FREHLEY 3669 (10-9-0)              5  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
BOSS TEN 1988 (11-12-0)                1  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
JACK EENTHABOCKS 2252 (10-7-0)         1  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
JACK O'LANTERN 2762 (5-4-0)            1  3  0  DEAD   ROYAL FLUSH          
JACK HAMMER 3790 (9-6-0)               0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
LANCE 183 (18-15-3)                    0  2  0         NEMESIS              

DEAD CHAMPIONS TOURNEY                 W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
ACE METRIC 3554 (3-4-0)                9  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
TOTO 3914 (16-9-0)                     8  3  0         LAND OF OZ           
TOONERSPIK 4715 (7-8-0)                5  3  1         SPOONERTIKS          
HEMLOCK 4288 (0-1-0)                   3  3  0         PURE POISON          
SCORPION KING 4718 (8-3-0)             0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          

DEAD ADEPTS TOURNEY                    W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
KAIN PILLER 4969 (2-4-0)               4  3  0         SPOONERTIKS          
BOMBAY 5043 (9-2-0)                    2  3  0         COFFEE RULES!        
TOP TEN LIST 2953 (3-1-0)              2  3  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
LUMBER JACK 2909 (1-1-0)               0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
TEDDY BEAR 1051 (5-1-1)                0  2  0         THE BEAR'S PAW       
TEN A. SHUSS 1642 (1-1-0)              0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
WHITE LIGHTNING 1307 (11-8-1)          0  2  0         BLACK STORM          

DEAD INITIATES TOURNEY                 W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
MOTHER THERESA 5136 (2-1-0)            3  3  0         OLD HABITS           
STROKE BROKER 5094 (5-4-1)             2  3  0         SPOONERTIKS          
HELL BENDER 3258 (3-3-2)               0  2  0         BLACK STORM          
JACK RABBIT 4814 (0-1-0)               0  2  0         ROYAL FLUSH          
LORD OF DISCIPLINE 1493 (3-5-0)        0  2  0         BLACK STORM          
PETIT CAL 3338 (6-2-1)                 0  2  0         BLACK STORM          
PING KIN 5174 (2-2-0)                  0  2  0         SPOONERTIKS          

DEAD APPRENTICES TOURNEY               W  L  K         TEAM NAME            
MOTHER SUPERIOR 5218 (0-0-0)           3  3  0         OLD HABITS           
NUZZLY FLAVA 5075 (0-1-0)              1  1  0  DEAD   MIXED-UP MIXERS      
ROBERT D'SABLE 5365 (0-1-0)            2  3  0         KNIGHTS TEMPLAR      
ELEN B'TON 4815 (2-2-0)                0  2  0         SPOONERTIKS