DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 03/22/2005    Duedate: 04/18/2005

SCOMSS SWAMP ARENA

DM-47    TURN-222

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

LEVIATHAN OF LARD
MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
(47-5113) [16-5-2,124]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

LEVIATHAN OF LARD              DEVOUT CHRISTIAN
MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)         NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
(47-5113) [16-5-2,124]         (47-5321) [6-3-2,48]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

AHURA MAZDA                    DASTER MARQUE
KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)          MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
(47-5152) [6-8-1,66]           (47-5196) [6-7-0,45]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

BLACK STORM (171)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)  51
2. MAYFAIR (607)               42      MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
3. THE DREAMING (591)          33      Unchartered Team
4. KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)       32
5. GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)       28      DOK SIK KILLAS (595)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 3*DOK SIK KILLAS (595)       9   5  2 64.3   1/ 2 BLACK STORM (171)        12  3 0
 2/ 4 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   257 154 21 62.5   2/ 1 LAND OF OZ (217)         11  4 0
 3/ 6 LAND OF OZ (217)         433 283 13 60.5   3/11*DOK SIK KILLAS (595)      9  5 2
 4/ 0*MAYFAIR (607)              3   2  0 60.0   4/ 6*NATURAL B. KILLERS (584)  9  5 1
 5/ 0*OF WOLF AND MAN (603)      3   2  0 60.0   5/ 5 SECOND BANANAS (573)      9  5 0
 6/ 5 FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)     27  19  5 58.7   6/ 9 THE JESUITS (524)         9  5 0
 7- 8 OLD HABITS (566)          25  18  1 58.1   7/10*VINCERE AUT MORI (588)    8  6 0
 8/10 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         580 459 30 55.8   8/15*ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)   8  7 3
 9/ 9 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)   33  27  2 55.0   9/ 4 FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)     8  7 2
10/17*NATURAL B. KILLERS (584)  23  19  4 54.8  10/12 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)    7  3 1
11/11 COFFEE RULES! (505)      125 104  5 54.6  11/20 ROYAL FLUSH (48)          7  4 0
12/13*VINCERE AUT MORI (588)    13  11  0 54.2  12/14*ADULT SWIM (589)          7  8 0
13/12 LIFE'S LESSONS (562)      91  79  5 53.5  13/ 7 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)   6  9 1
14/21*ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)    8   7  3 53.3  14/19*LEADERS (593)             5  5 1
15/14 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)     305 274 30 52.7  15/23 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)      5  5 0
16-15*RAT SALAD (577)           22  20  0 52.4  16-16 HOME GUARD (402)          5  5 0
17/18 NEMESIS (32)             137 132 13 50.9  17/29*GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)     5  7 1
18/23 BLACK STORM (171)         68  66  8 50.7  18/ 8 COFFEE RULES! (505)       5 10 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19-22 SKELETON KEY (493)        78  78  3 50.0  19/13 KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)     5 10 0
20/16*THE RIPPER CREW (489)     15  15  0 50.0  20/24*SOULFORGE (587)           4 10 0
21/ 1*LEADERS (593)              5   5  1 50.0  21/30*THE DREAMING (591)        4 11 1
22/20 SECOND BANANAS (573)      33  35  2 48.5  22/ 0*OF WOLF AND MAN (603)     3  2 0
23/25 THE JESUITS (524)         68  81 12 45.6  23-18 SKELETON KEY (493)        3  2 0
24-26*DRACONIC REALM (519)      10  13  0 43.5  24-17*RAT SALAD (577)           3  2 0
25/ 0 ROYAL COMATENTS (301)     56  74  2 43.1  25/ 0*MAYFAIR (607)             3  2 0
26-27 HOME GUARD (402)          30  40  2 42.9  26/32*FALLEN (590)              3  5 0
27/33*GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)      6   8  1 42.9  27/35 LIFE'S LESSONS (562)      3  5 0
28-30 I HATE THEM (597)         27  37  1 42.2  28/33*THE RIPPER CREW (489)     3  7 0
29/28 TREBORS (232)             80 111  8 41.9  29/21 NEMESIS (32)              3 12 0
30/24 DARK PINNACLE (598)       14  20  2 41.2  30-22 OLD HABITS (566)          2  3 0
31/31*ADULT SWIM (589)           8  12  0 40.0  31/ 0*BLEAK LEGION (601)        1  3 0
32/32 KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)     29  44  2 39.7  32/ 0*SALEM'S LOT (605)         1  4 0
33/34*FALLEN (590)               3   5  0 37.5  33- 0*DARK SIDE (602)           1  4 0
34/35*SOULFORGE (587)            7  17  2 29.2  34/25 DARK PINNACLE (598)       1  5 0
35/36*THE DREAMING (591)         4  11  1 26.7  35/28 TREBORS (232)             1  5 0
36/ 0*BLEAK LEGION (601)         1   3  0 25.0  36-37*DRACONIC REALM (519)      0  2 0
37- 0*DARK SIDE (602)            1   4  0 20.0  37/ 0 ROYAL COMATENTS (301)     0  1 0
38/ 0*SALEM'S LOT (605)          1   4  0 20.0  38/ 0*ZOIDS (606)               0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

                                        "Declarations"

     The caped figure stood on the roof of the building across the street from the 
Vendetta United Alliance house.  He had been studying the habits of those inside for 
two weeks in order to perform the act that he had came to do tonight.  He watched as 
the last of the servants left for the night.  Two a.m. exactly, right on schedule.  
He looked back at the portal he had used to Travel here tonght.  He had tied off the 
flows of Power to keep the portal open due to the amount  of traveling he had done 
that day.  And considering the Power he would use for this "project" he might not be 
able to open another from scratch.
     He considered the reasons for why he had come to do this thing.  His new ally 
had declared war against these men and been left out to dry by those who he thought 
were his allies.  He would show this new member and the other who joined with him the 
commitment they could expect from their new alliance and strike the first flames of 
the war to come in a single stroke.  He liked war, where else could a man show his 
mettle?  Where else could he show the soldier he is?  Because when the battle burns, 
when the flames are high, when death seems near, your either fight or you don't.  
You're either a soldier or you're not.  He was a Lord High Commander, he was a 
soldier.  He fought.  It's what he did.  It was time.
     He reached out to the Power, touched the Gods ever so lightly, and drew on Their 
powers.  He channeled fire and air together.  Lightning like white liquid.  Half the 
building was destroyed in an instant, leaving only the front facade of the building 
standing.  He cursed.  He had wanted the whole building destroyed.  He felt the void 
slipping as his anger and exhaustion grew.  Then quickly he drew on the Power one 
last time to do a trick he had done to that fool in Jhans.  Letters a foot tall 
quickly appeared in the ruined visage of the building.  He then stumbled through 
the Portal, untieing the Flows as he went.  The denizens of North Fork/SCOMMS Swamp 
who wre coming out of their homes to see what had happend were bathed in the fiery 
glow of the letters and what they said:

                                            AZRAEL WAS HERE

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                                    Coulrophobia

     Hammer was sweating profusely, his psychosis had overwhelmed him.  As he peeked 
out of the window of his guildhouse, he saw clowns everywhere.  As long as he could 
remember, they had always terrified him.  The doctors called it coulrophobia, the 
fear of clowns.
     His twisted mind, now made everything he feared look like a clown.  As he 
thought of his rivals at vendett@United he began to tremble in fear and the yellow 
puddle at his feet grew larger.
     Hammer had even left the Vendetta Cartel because he couldn't bear to be in their 
presence.  They, like everyone else, now looked like clowns.  He kept himself in 
seclusion and the very thought of being around others actually made him cry.
     ABRAXIS sat back gleefully planning his assault on Hammer's Guildhouse.  It was 
common knowledge about his coulrophobia and he and his cohorts had quite a surprise 
in store for Hammer.
     It was 3:00 am as Wasby and Toker entered Hammer's Guildhouse.  Wasby carried a 
soft cloth and a bottle of ether and Toker carried the surprise that would ruin 
Hammer's life.  Shortly they left Hammer's, both of them laughing maniacally.
     Hammer awoke in the morning and as he climbed out of bed, he tripped over his 
giant clown feet.  He grabbed his looking glass and screamed in terror as he saw his 
white face and bulbous nose.  Once again he found himself standing in a large yellow 
puddle.

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                                  TURF WAR IV UPDATE

     Well...by the time you read this, only three more turns and we'll start this 
little shebang off.  Hoepfully, with a few more teams than what we've received so 
far.  I do have a couple of things to relay, so...

1.  Goat will have to reclaim his Champion as Wyrd is in the Chamion's bracket 
(ironic ain't it?  Champ in the Champ's...okay, a little lame).

2.  Kate can redeclare for another alliance up until Turn 225 is CFH doesn't verify 
her.  Of course, that stands for everyone.  If you ain't satisfied where you are, you 
can change it.  After T225, you're stuck where you claimed.  Unless, of course, the 
Captain of the alliance doesn't verify you.  Then, you can reclaim.

3.  Who is David Webb?  I received a Gift Cert. from him, and I don't know this 
person's manager alias.  Can't credit them until I know.

     Okay, that's pretty much for the notices thus far.  Here's updates for 
alliances:

Vendett@United/CFH, Cpt.                        (0)   (0)   d    v    cert
Rat Salad/CFH/Baby                              (0)   (0)   y    y     n
Leaders/Abraxis                                 (0)   (0)   y    y     n
Vincere Aut Mori/Toker/Gangsta Creep            (0)   (0)   y    y     n
Soulforge/Wasby/Culonegro                       (0)   (0)   y    y     n
The Jesuits/Goat                                (0)   (0)   y    y     n
Skeleton Key/Skullagrim                         (0)   (0)   y    y     n
Tombstone/Big Nose Kate                         (0)   (0)   y    n     y
Dark Side/Sho-Time                              (0)   (0)   y    n     n
(Dok Sik Killas/Dok Sik)                        (0)   (0)   n    n     n

(CFH -- I checked to see if you'd verified Dok Sik, but you haven't.  Although, I 
know he's a member of your alliance...rules state you have to verify him and he still 
hasn't posted a declaration to participate with you...rules is rules, ya know?)

Vendetta Cartel/Kat, Cpt.                       (0)   (0)   d    v     cert
The Bear's Paw/Kat                              (0)   (0)   y    y     n
Manegerial Mayhem/Fizban                        (0)   (0)   y    y     n
Darque Forces/Master Darque                     (0)   (0)   n    y     n
Natural B. Killers/Maximillian                  (0)   (0)   n    y     n
Life's Lessons/Street Legal                     (0)   (0)   n    y     n
(Home Guard/Firehawk)                           (0)   (0)   n    n     n

(Kat -- same thing with Firehawk.  I know he's VC, but...no declaration or 
verification to participate.)

SCOMS Tower/Oz. Capt.                           (0)   (0)   d    v    cert
Old Habits/Soultaker                            (0)   (0)   n    y     n
Royal Flush/Crip                                (0)   (0)   n    y     n
Land of Oz/Oz the Successful                    (0)   (0)   n    y     n
Second Bananas/Mannequin                        (0)   (0)   n    y     n
Mystic Orc Feast/Slugbait                       (0)   (0)   n    y     n

T.A.T.I.O.Z.H.C./Mr. Coffee, Cpt.               (0)   (0)   d    v    cert
Coffee Rules!/Mr. Coffee                        (0)   (0)   y    y     y

Illuminati/Talon Darkhart, Cpt.                 (0)   (0)   d    v    cert
Adult Swim/Talon Darkhart                       (0)   (0)   y    y     y
Draconic Realm/Sir Chester                      (0)   (0)   y    y     y
The Dreaming/P-Diddy                            (0)   (0)   y    y     y
The Fallen/Azrael                               (0)   (0)   y    y     y
Knights Templar/Baphomet                        (0)   (0)   y    y     y
Dark Pinnacle/Buddy Lee	                        (0)   (0)   n    y     y
Gothic Ministry/Liam the Goth                   (0)   (0)   n    y     y
?/Asmo Dius                                     (0)   (0)   n    y     n
?/Assurnasirbanipal                             (0)   (0)   n    y     n
?/Tripwire                                      (0)   (0)   n    y     n
?/Flagg                                         (0)   (0)   n    y     n
?/Matrixx                                       (0)   (0)   n    y     n

Independents                                    (0)   (0)   d    v    cert

Feathers Flying/Barnabas                        (0)   (0)   n    n     n
The Rippers Crew/?                              (0)   (0)   n    n     n
Nemesis/Snarky                                  (0)   (0)   n    n     n
Black Storm/?                                   (0)   (0)   n    n     n
Trebors/?                                       (0)   (0)   n    n     n

                                ********************
 
     Just for kicks and giggles (and to find a fast way of tallying scores) I tallied 
them for Turn 221.

Vendett@United/CFH, Cpt.                        (48)
SCOMS Tower/Oz, Cpt.                            (28)
Vendetta Cartel/Kat, Cpt.                       (18)
Illuminati/Talon Darkhart, Cpt                  (14)
T.A.T.I.O.A.H.C./Mr. Coffee, Cpt.                (2)
Independents                                   (-10)

Vendetta Cartel and Illuminati were the only teams who didn't have a member scoring a 
negative score.

Top Scorer was Goat with 24 points.  Second highest was Oz with 15 pts (go figure!).  
Dok Sik and Toker were tied for third with 10 pts apiece.

     Before I forget, legend for charts was "d = declared", v = verified."  The first 
(0) is the total points.  The second (0) is for points for the current turn.
     Well, that's about it.  Any questions?

Baphomet, Host of TW4
Co-Founder of TCB
Illuminati Conferderation of Alliances
and a bunch of other meaningless, self-appointed titles that no one cares about

      * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                                   A Matter of War
                         [as retold by Hammer the WordSmith]

     Multitudes of memories flooded the mind of Hammer as he prepared himself for the 
task at hand.
     A trustworthy companion stood ready to administer the Sacred Elven Dagger as 
Hammer had directed.
     For many long years Hammer had reached out to many young managers scattered 
across the sands and arenas of Alastari; sharing what limited knowledge that the now 
Veteran Manager had acquired and/or observed in regards to various strategies and 
creations of warrior styles; in an effort to help level the playing field between the 
newcomers who came from all walks of life and the jaded veterans who were reluctant 
or even openly defiant in regards to assisting the newcomers; while Hammer fought  to 
prevent many newbies from becoming discouraged and leaving the game.
     It had been Hammer's Quest over the years to help newbies develop into 
competitive managers who could hold their own in any tourney or arena they chose to 
enter.
     Hammer had even concentrated his energies upon sponsoring contests to promote 
the growth and development of certain arenas; yet with each passing year the 
disrespect and personal attacks upon Hammer while hosting contests had grown with 
mounting maliciousness with each passing contest, until Hammer had had his fill of 
being nice.
     There had been a time when Hammer felt that his energies were being channeled 
into something that was helpful for the good of all who participated.
     Now things had changed drastically and Hammer had been welcomed into a group 
alliance that was ready, willing and able to dish out the disrespect with the best of 
them.
     Hammer braced himself for the change and welcomed all that it would entail.
     The gentle strokes of the Sacred Elven Dagger signaled a new beginning as the 
hair on Hammer's head fell to the ground, marking the new look of the kLk Minister of 
War.
     Hammer looked into the Elven Looking Glass to view the head that he had not seen 
since his younger days as a boy thirsting for knowledge and information.
     There was a grim satisfaction in the eyes of Hammer as he glanced from one arena 
newsletter to the next.
     "You Clowns picked the wrong day to mess with me!"

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     Somewhere over the RAINBOW, way up high ...  Like way up high on the DM throne, 
thank you!  You guys are so lucky to have me as the Duelmistress because it speaks 
well for our arena when the best is on top, rather than some silly usurper.  So here 
I am on top where I should have been long ago, while I waited for my good friend 
courage to enjoy my seat.
     I am sure you are all glad that I will not be around much longer.  Hah!  That 
old geezer Hammer wished me out of this arena, the Cad!  But I was ready to go.  You 
can only do this DM stuff for so long, you know?  And I have done it for a while.  Oh 
yeah! 
     So here is all that you ever wanted to know about me.  Mode.  Total Parry.  
Colorful.  Adex - Parry, with experts in Riposte, defense, and attack.  16(+2)-
20(+2)-13-14(+1)-21(+2)-7(+1)-11(+2) Dratted Small shield and verylow/verylow/attack.  
21-9-0, plus 23-24-0 in tournaments (daggone those nasty aimers!) 1 DM crown.
     So good luck to all.  I know Oz is trying like "heck" to keep Hourglass winning, 
without downchallenging and without winning the DM title.  So this spot should be 
wide open. See ya.
          Rainbow, a Duelmistress Of Color

                                      SPY REPORT

     Welcome SCOMSS SWAMP.  I, Olaf Modeen remember this place well.  Many the fights 
have I fought here.  The celebrations, the disappointments...  Biff!  Pow!  SCOMSS 
SWAMP watched with glee as LAND OF OZ got knocked off top spot by BLACK STORM!  You 
know what they say about the herd of lions who studied a judge...  GOTHIC MINISTRY 
moved up 12 places, to 17th.  It seems so recently people were saying ROYAL FLUSH was 
washed up, finished.  But 3-1-0 moved them up 9.  I guess they're washed no more...  
A team with purpose!  A team with the skill to back up their boasts!  Getting a 3-2-0 
their first time out is OF WOLF AND MAN.  Welcome to SCOMSS SWAMP, MAYFAIR!  We need 
more teams who can get a 3-2-0 their first time out!  What's with CLINTONLIKESBUSH?  
He actually beat TREBORS' KOZYTA, and walked away with 21 more points from the fight. 
Laughs were big at ROYAL FLUSH while they watched ACE METRIC clobber GALDR.  He lost 
16 points and got bruised from objects thrown from the stands.  SPAWING OF SPEWN was 
reminded on the sands why RAINBOW is Duelmaster.  I suppose you want to hear some 
rumors and dirty gossip about your fellow fighters?  Tough!   
     No matter the time or place, men will always duel.  How well I know the feeling 
of being in the most avoided team!  Don't fall out of practive, SKELETON KEY!  The 
bums at LAND OF OZ couldn't face the challenges from SKELETON KEY!  No excuse for 
that!  How well I know the feeling of being the most challenged warrior, MAHARA!  
Don't make idle boasts, they may come back to haunt you.  Fighting is a better craft 
than farming, ART PENDRAGON, but you have to pay your dues.  Being challenged by 
LEVIATHAN OF LARD, 26 points above you, is dues.  LEVIATHAN OF LARD bested ART 
PENDRAGON.  MYSTIC ORC FEAST calls this fighting?  In my day...  Maybe KNIGHTS 
TEMPLAR's AMALRIC is one of those guys who likes pain, or something.  That's what 
he'll get next week, after challenging up 28 to FREEZE DRIED.  I don't get it.  
AMALRIC goes and challenges FREEZE DRIED, way above him, but gets 6 points after he 
loses!  Is this a new strategy?  I hate going to the effort of writing about the kind 
of fights that PICUS gets in.  He fights people like NIGHT TERROR, 12 points below.  
I thought PICUS showed great skill and promise when he was bested by NIGHT TERROR.  
All right, so I slept through it!  Big deal!   
     Warriors of SCOMSS SWAMP unite.  You have only your games to lose!  DRASTARDY 
DAKE of MANEGERIAL MAYHEM didn't know when to quit.  When you've got a 6-7-1, that's 
a good sign.  Now he's dead.  Yeah, yeah, ANTON LEVAY killed CLOCKWORK ORANGE, who 
was "too young to die."  Well, he was a fighter, and that's what you have to face.  
The ultimate victory is one that results in death.  DEEP FRIED LARD of knows this.  
Will MANEGERIAL MAYHEM attempt a Bloodfeud?  Someone told DRASTARDY DAKE that MYSTIC 
ORC FEAST never Bloodfeuded, that he'd have an easy kill.  Well, I'm sure whoever 
misled you is right sorry.  Many a warrior has met his fate in a hungover stupor.  
You young rapscallions, take note!   
     Well, I'm pretty much through.  You guys need to get back practicing.  Are you 
as tired of reading this as I am of writing it?  Actually, I guess I'm writing it 
before you read it.  Oh, well.  Time for my medication, so I'll leave now.  Practice, 
practice, practice!-- Olaf Modeen  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LEVIATHAN OF LARD 5113       16   5  2   124       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HOURGLASS 5127               17   2  0   118       LAND OF OZ (217)
-NULN 5467                    10   2  1   115       I HATE THEM (597)
-GREGOLA 5101                 21  13  0   111       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
-PAULA BONES 4414             18  13  1   101       SKELETON KEY (493)
-THE GREEK GUY 5478           11   4  0   100       I HATE THEM (597)
-OSLOBEN BENBOBEN 4561        14  13  1    97       SKELETON KEY (493)
 WYRD 5167                    10   3  0    93       THE JESUITS (524)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SPAWING OF SPEWN 5197        10   3  0    93       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 ART PENDRAGON 5151            8   9  0    92       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JABBERWOCK 1277              13  15  3    90       NEMESIS (32)
 TOTO 3914                    17   9  0    86       LAND OF OZ (217)
 ACE METRIC 3554               6   4  0    85       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 MARAJUANA MAN 3411           10   4  2    82       BLACK STORM (171)
 JENNA 5099                   13   9  3    77       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 RAVEN 3354                   10   8  0    74       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 AHURA MAZDA 5152              6   8  1    66       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 GALDR 5171                    7   5  1    63       THE JESUITS (524)
-BABY 5224                     7   2  0    62       RAT SALAD (577)
-KRAMER 5191                   7   5  0    61       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 LEPPADA 2257                 13  21  0    60       TREBORS (232)
 STING 2724                   13   9  0    59       NEMESIS (32)
 SIR GALAHAD 5148              9   7  0    59       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 FIGHTING TREE 5235            8   6  0    59       LAND OF OZ (217)
-AMELA BUNDERSON 5339          6   2  0    58       SKELETON KEY (493)
-SARA F. 5349                  5   2  0    58       SKELETON KEY (493)
 MINOR BLUE 5326               7   3  1    57       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PAUL BEARER 5187              7   7  2    55       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
-YURI KARLOMOV 4215           10   2  0    53       HOME GUARD (402)
-SISTER MARY SARAH 5137        9   3  0    52       OLD HABITS (566)
-GREEDY 5223                   6   2  0    52       RAT SALAD (577)
 HUMBUG 5199                   9   6  1    50       LAND OF OZ (217)
-TAKALEREIHN II 4260           5   6  1    49       HOME GUARD (402)
 DEVOUT CHRISTIAN 5321         6   3  2    48       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 BEAR NEKKID 5126             10   8  0    46       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 DASTER MARQUE 5196            6   7  0    45       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 CLINTONLIKESBUSH 5318         6   3  0    45       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 LITTLE BIG MAN 5393           4   0  1    45       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 SWEET N LOW 5306              6   5  0    42       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 ZOMBIE KNIGHT 3564           10   2  0    41       BLACK STORM (171)
 KOZYTA 2640                   9  12  2    41       TREBORS (232)
 MAHARA 2656                   9  12  1    40       TREBORS (232)
-RASP 3353                     7  10  0    40       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
-TEN C-0 METER 5141            7   7  0    40       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 B.B. CROSS 5323               7   3  2    39       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
-FAT-BOY 5221                  6   2  0    39       RAT SALAD (577)
 GANGSTA CREEP 5391            4   1  0    39       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
 LEET STREEGLE 5368            4   1  0    37       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
-KELLANTH 3410                 9   6  0    35       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
 FREEZE DRIED 5308             8   3  0    34       COFFEE RULES! (505)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LADY ARCANE 4381              4   2  0    33       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
 HALLE BEARY 5312              3   7  0    33       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 MSK 5507                      2   0  1    33       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
-SISTER MARY CLARENCE 5262     4   4  0    32       OLD HABITS (566)
-PAVEL MOLARI II 3665          6   8  1    31       HOME GUARD (402)
 GAFF 5347                     5   1  0    30       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 WHITE SETTLER 5322            4   5  1    30       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
-STEAL SHANK 5487              4   2  0    30       DARK PINNACLE (598)
-PAVEL MOLARI III 4539         3   5  0    30       HOME GUARD (402)
 DON KING 5374                 2   2  0    30       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 SWAMP LILY HAMMER 5441        3   0  0    29       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
-ARAUTHATOR 4660               3   1  0    29       DRACONIC REALM (519)
 DEAD ANGLE 5418               2   1  1    29       THE DREAMING (591)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CRISTER MOFFEE 5289           7   5  1    28       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 ANTON LEVAY 5429              2   0  1    28       LEADERS (593)
 KENTSUI FURY 4382             4   2  0    27       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
-ANTI 5457                     3   3  0    26       I HATE THEM (597)
-TROUBLE 4151                  2   1  0    26       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
 CYANIDE 5444                  2   1  1    25       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
 BENDER 5395                   4   0  0    24       ADULT SWIM (589)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 EVICSERATOR 5358              5   1  0    23       BLACK STORM (171)
-GET THE POINT? 5097           3   8  0    23       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 SWAMP TRAP HAMMER 5442        2   1  1    23       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 FAJR FALAK 4380               2   4  0    23       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
 BLOOD RAYNE 5489              5   5  0    22       DARK PINNACLE (598)
 JACK & JILL 5310              5   4  0    22       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 FRED BEAR 5348                4   4  0    22       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 TITANIA 2958                  3   8  0    22       NEMESIS (32)
 EBOLA (Z) 5447                2   1  0    21       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
-SISTER SLEDGE 5341            2   1  0    21       OLD HABITS (566)
-BORIS MARKOV 4540             3   5  0    20       HOME GUARD (402)
 MIDGUARD 5410                 3   1  0    20       THE JESUITS (524)
 MELON MUSH 5357               5   3  0    18       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 APPIUS 5392                   3   2  0    18       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
 VASH THE STAMPEDE 5396        2   2  0    18       ADULT SWIM (589)
 BLACK THUNDER 3885            4   4  0    17       BLACK STORM (171)
 DARK WARLOCK 5422             3   1  0    17       GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)
 HANTA 5443                    2   1  0    17       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
-VALAMARADACE 4695             2   2  0    16       DRACONIC REALM (519)
 DIPTHERIA 5445                2   0  0    16       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
 BLACK BALL 5520               2   0  0    16       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
 SUZANNE 5560                  1   0  0    16       MAYFAIR (607)
 CAFE AU LAIT 5344             3   6  0    15       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 IMMAZAEL 5384                 2   3  1    15       SOULFORGE (587)
 INCUBUS 5423                  2   2  1    15       GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)
 SWAMP BURP HAMMER 5439        2   1  1    14       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
-BEN HURT 4150                 2   1  0    14       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
 NIGHT TERROR 5420             1   2  0    14       THE DREAMING (591)
 STELLA 5561                   1   0  0    14       MAYFAIR (607)
 BEAR SKINRUG 5399             2   1  0    13       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 DRAMA QUEEN 5494              2   0  0    13       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
-KYLE 5523                     1   0  0    12       DARK SIDE (602)
 DROPSHOT 5402                 1   0  0    12       FALLEN (590)
 WAR CRY HAMM 5436             1   2  0    12       THE JESUITS (524)
 TSO TSUNG T'ANG 4391          3   2  0    11       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
 WOODY 5412                    3   1  0    11       SECOND BANANAS (573)
-KENSAI 5267                   2   5  0    11       RAT SALAD (577)
 TRESSA 5388                   2   3  0    11       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
 WILSON 5482                   2   1  0    11       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 BONDS ON 'ROIDS 5408          1   0  0    11       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 DAY DREAM 5417                1   2  0    11       THE DREAMING (591)
 ETIENNE DUPLAIX 5377          2   3  1    10       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 BADI AL ZAMAN 4384            2   4  0    10       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
-SOULTAKER 5455                1   0  0    10       I HATE THEM (597)
 JUSTICE FOR ALL 5534          1   0  0    10       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
 FRYLOCKE 5541                 1   0  0    10       ADULT SWIM (589)
 ZOMBIE ASSASSIN 5552          1   0  0    10       SALEM'S LOT (605)
 OBLIVION 5518                 1   0  0    10       BLEAK LEGION (601)
 LIL BIT 5404                  1   0  0    10       FALLEN (590)
 ZYKLON 5548                   1   0  0    10       THE JESUITS (524)
 CARLOTTA 5559                 1   0  0    10       MAYFAIR (607)
 AMALRIC 5378                  0   5  0    10       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 JACK MCFARLAND 5481           2   1  0     9       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 GRENDEL 5376                  2   3  0     9       NEMESIS (32)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ROBUST BREW 5400              2   2  0     8       COFFEE RULES! (505)
-CLAUGIYLIAMATAR 4694          2   1  0     7       DRACONIC REALM (519)
 AXELROD GUNNER 5401           1   1  0     7       FALLEN (590)
 ANTHRAX 5446                  1   2  1     6       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
 SWAMP CLAW HAMMER 5438        1   2  1     6       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 PICUS 5390                    1   3  0     6       VINCERE AUT MORI (588)
-FASTDRAW 5315                 1   3  0     6       RAT SALAD (577)
 BLACKENED 5531                1   0  0     5       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
 ONE 5533                      1   0  0     5       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
 GENESIS 5435                  1   2  0     5       SOULFORGE (587)
 DEMONIC HEX 5530              1   0  0     5       GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)
 CAPPUCCINO 5382               0   5  0     5       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 CHARLES MANSON 5428           0   2  0     5       LEADERS (593)
 DAVID KARESH 5426             1   1  0     4       LEADERS (593)
 SON YUNG MOON 5427            1   1  0     4       LEADERS (593)
-HOLLE' CHERRY 5437            1   0  0     4       SKELETON KEY (493)
 SHADOW RAINS 5405             0   2  0     4       FALLEN (590)
 BROCK SAMPSON 5416            0   3  0     3       THE DREAMING (591)
 SWAMP ROSE HAMMER 5440        0   3  0     3       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 ERON RIPPER 5403              0   2  0     2       FALLEN (590)
 CARRION WURM 5550             0   1  0     1       SALEM'S LOT (605)
 SHORTEST STRAW 5532           0   1  0     1       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
 CHARLOTTE 5562                0   1  0     1       MAYFAIR (607)
 CRYPT ANGEL 5553              0   1  0     1       SALEM'S LOT (605)
 ROWAN 5563                    0   1  0     1       MAYFAIR (607)
 HITLER YOUTH 5547             0   1  0     1       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 TARZAN 5542                   0   1  0     1       NEMESIS (32)
 FEL STRIKE 5516               0   1  0     1       BLEAK LEGION (601)
 DYERS EVE 5535                0   1  0     1       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
 LADY SCALE 5517               0   1  0     1       BLEAK LEGION (601)
 BRASSBACK 5544                0   1  0     1       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
-TUNNERS 5525                  0   1  0     1       DARK SIDE (602)
 SHADE'S FORM 5549             0   1  0     1       SALEM'S LOT (605)
 LIAM 5485                     0   1  0     1       DARK PINNACLE (598)
-DANK MAN KIETH 5524           0   1  0     1       DARK SIDE (602)
-JEREMY 5521                   0   1  0     1       DARK SIDE (602)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
SEALAB 2021 5504       0  2 0 ADULT SWIM 589        THE BARTENDER 26      222 NONE    
FAMILY GUY 5398        1  3 0 ADULT SWIM 589        B.B. CROSS 5323       222         
CLOCKWORK ORANGE 5415  2  1 0 BLACK STORM 171       ANTON LEVAY 5429      222         
VERITAS 5379           0  1 0 BLACK STORM 171       SOUL SEEKER 5387      218 REVENGED
WEAKNESS 5515          0  1 0 BLEAK LEGION 601      INCUBUS 5423          222         
MISS RIP OFF 5484      0  1 0 DARK PINNACLE 598     THE BARTENDER 26      222 NONE    
LIL MS PIKER 5486      0  1 0 DARK PINNACLE 598     MR. COFFEE 24         222 NONE    
BIRD 5522              0  1 0 DARK SIDE 602         ANTHRAX 5446          221         
DA47 5543              0  1 0 THE DREAMING 591      BAPHOMET 22           222 NONE    
KNIGHTMARE 5419        0  1 0 THE DREAMING 591      SWAMP CLAW HAMME 5438 220 REVENGED
KELSO 5324             2  4 0 FEATHERS FLYIN' 585   WHITE SETTLER 5322    219 REVENGED
REJECTED BY GOD 5529   0  1 0 GOTHIC MINISTRY 592   MURDEROUS MARK 18     222 NONE    
HUMAN SACRIFICE 5528   0  1 0 GOTHIC MINISTRY 592   PUTRID PATRICK 19     222 NONE    
JIM JONES 5430         1  1 0 LEADERS 593           DEAD ANGLE 5418       222         
THE FISHER KING 5104  15 18 1 LIFE'S LESSONS 562    LEVIATHAN OF LAR 5113 218 NOT REVE
BEWARE OF CLONES 5409  0  1 0 LIFE'S LESSONS 562    CYANIDE 5444          220 REVENGED
DRASTARDY DAKE 5198    6  7 1 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM 574 DEEP FRIED LARD 4975  222 NONE    
CORPULENT CORPSE 5250  7  5 0 MYSTIC ORC FEAST 416  DRASTARDY DAKE 5198   220 JUST REV
THE KURGEN 5375        1  3 0 NEMESIS 32            SWAMP TRAP HAMME 5442 221         
DA 5551                0  1 0 SALEM'S LOT 605       BAPHOMET 22           222 NONE    
9121111151313 5545     0  1 0 SECOND BANANAS 573    MURDEROUS MARK 18     222 NONE    
SKIPPY 5411            1  2 0 SECOND BANANAS 573    MSK 5507              221         
AMAZON JANE 5414       0  3 0 SOULFORGE 587         GUILLOTINE GARTH 20   222 NONE    

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
SOUL SEEKER 5387       2  3 1 SOULFORGE 587         DEVOUT CHRISTIAN 5321 222         
SHADOW 5434            1  2 0 SOULFORGE 587         SWAMP BURP HAMME 5439 222         
THE INFINITE 5383      1  1 0 SOULFORGE 587         LITTLE BIG MAN 5393   219         
BIG CREEPY 5385        0  1 0 SOULFORGE 587         ETIENNE DUPLAIX 5377  218 REVENGED
LAST ROACH 5386        0  2 0 SOULFORGE 587         DEVOUT CHRISTIAN 5321 219         
VENDETTA CLOWN 5554    0  1 0 ZOIDS 606             WURM KIN 27           222 NONE    

                                     PERSONAL ADS

San Jose Snark -- Well, maybe if we ever got snow where i lived i might give a rat's 
ass about the game.  But until the far off land of 'Dixie' turns into an artic tundra 
I'll take SEC football and my Falcons any day. -- TDH
P.S.  I do like your team logo though.  Actually owned a shark jersey once just b/c 
of that.

Oz -- Ah.  Well it's good Crip Gretzky is enjoying himself.  Perhaps he can spend 
some time playing canadian football.  It is longer faster and some other promotional 
lie i can't remember.  *grin* -- TDH, the ever wise-cracking
P.S.  I hear you're a wiz of a wiz if ever a wiz there was....
P.P.S.  <insert judy garland joke here> kLk God of War, Illuminati Alliance 
Puppetmaster

The Fellowship is pleased to announce an improvement in operational excellence.  
Contrary to previous communications,the formidable SLUGBAIT will lead SCOMS Towers in 
this upcoming Turf War.  All hail Slugbait!  (I'll bet you are all foaming at the 
mouth to see who will lead "The Return Of The SCOMS/King?) -- Oz The All Proclaiming

White Settler -- Sorry Pal, you're gonna have to take it somewhere else, next time 
I'll be running something faster so it won't even be close! -- B.B.

ClintBush -- Your path seems to cross over ours quite often, this time chalk one up 
for us! -- Gaff

Skippy -- Sorry bud, looks like you were second banana! -- MSK

Soulie -- I mourn your loss. -- Barnabas

Oz -- If you have an extra crying towel laying around you might want to break it out 
and let Soulie know Skippy's not coming home. -- Barnabas

Solar Frogs, of course!  And welcome to our great friend, Hammer. -- Oz, The All 
Friendly
P.S.  Thanks for the compliments.  And no "guest teammates" unless our leader 
Slugbait decides otherwise.  And FYI, it looks like the "undefeated chain" is clearly 
out of our system.  (Chuckle)

Hammer -- You got your wish, you Cad! -- Rainbow (on her way out.)

Maximillian -- Thank you, Sir. -- Oz The All Appreciative

Discrimination!!!  Noted on the final page of the last turn that the only "suck offs" 
to ADM were Rainbow and Courage of Land Of Oz and Deep Fried Lard of Mystic Orc 
Feast.  Only SCOMSS?  Discrimination! -- Oz The All Discombobulated

Mr Coffee and Snarky -- Thank you for the very nice and kind notes. -- Oz The All 
Blushing

Blackstorm -- Welcome back, pal.  It is SCOMSS Swamp because The Fellowship Of The 
SCOMSS won the TWIII and earned the right to name it so for 6 months.  Neat, Huh? -- 
Oz The All Welcoming

Baphomet -- Gee, thanks!  Now that is more like it! -- Oz The Most Friendly Manager

Baphomet -- You must, indeed, have stole it as this past 3-2 did not measure up. -- 
Oz The All Humbled 

Slugbait -- Despite my "gripes" above, congrats on Deep Fried Lard.  I'll take fries 
with that. -- Oz The All Praising

Art Pendragon -- You gave it a grand shot! -- Courage

Final #s for Courage were not what was expected.  BS/mod/low/Init -- The Land Of Oz 
Chronicler

Khalums Dwarf -- You have no color! -- Rainbow

     It's the Curse of Khalhums.

Yeah!  And you have no figure either!  Hah! -- Hourglass

     Dwarves don't have figures ever.  It's against their racial rules.

Wyrd -- Gee, I was never in that fight.  You are too good for me!  Your team must 
have close contact with a god or something? -- Fighting Tree

We are glad to have Toto back, even though we are not in Kansas anymore. -- Oz The 
All Thankful

Spawing Of Spew of Managerial Mayhem, you managed, I spewed.  Salute. -- Humbug 
(feeling very "bah")

Baphomet -- Five rollup certs should be on the way to you for TWIV from SCOMS.  If 
you receive "extras" from us, add them to the prize list. -- Oz The All Benevolent

Don King -- Not bad, but I'm the most likely, on my team, to go to the dark arena.  
So you got the win but we both have losing records. -- Fajr Falak

Takalereihm II -- Wow, you are impresive.  And not a bad teacher either. -- Lady 
Arcane

Ahura Mazda -- I was planning on winning every fight in my career.  Now you've gone 
and ruined my planes. -- Kentsui Fury

Black Ball -- Next time I'm bringing a bigger weapon. -- Badi Al Zaman

Night Terror -- I don't sleep at night -- Tso Tsung 

Hammer -- What have you gotten yourself into?  What's this feud you've got going on?  
I remember our days back in Vithicar, the city of mages, we had a deadly but friendly 
rivalry going on.  I killed a couple of your fighters, you killed a couple of mine.  
No big deal we moved on.  I do know one thing.  You never stand alone.  My blades are 
available for you to use as you see fit.  I will stand with you against anyone who 
dares to feud with you.  As always, may Kjarran guide your blades. -- Noachian, mgr. 
The Ripper Crew, Servant of Kjarran

GOAT -- Hey, little man.  Checked out one of your PAs in another arena.  You don't 
wanna call names, huh?  But you admit that you gave orders for others in the group to 
'harass' Hammer.  Awww, what's the matter?  Not man enough to do your own dirty work?  
If you wanna harass someone do it yourself.  And don't go blaming CFH.  Exactly how 
UNITED can your alliance be when you're pointing fingers at alliance mates?  You 
invite people to another arena.  Another contest.  Well, here's my counterproposal.  
If you got a single hair on the ole GOAT sack we do this RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW.  
Gather up all your little buddies and get all 'UNITED' real quick and let's see who 
will be here when it's all said and done.  And you're in Talcama too.  *evil grin*  
Boy, I sure would hate to take advantage of the no avoids pact in there.  Yea, I sure 
would.  *evil grin*  So what you say?  You man enough for it or you just another 
poser babbling forth filth because you like the sound of your own voice and putting 
all kinda pretty titles after your name.  Well here's some titles of my own. -- Talon 
Darkhart, kLk GOD of WAR, AKA...YO DADDY
P.S.  Your mamma says hi....

CFH -- Don't know what kinda alliance you run but when people point fingers at each 
other it doesn't say much for unity.  Just remember, you sleep with goats you might 
wake up with something worse then fleas. -- TDH

Vendetta @ United -- I hope you guys get mad.  More than that.  I hope you swear to 
get even.  And if you aren't fired up enough yet...remember this. -- TDH, standing 
over a yellow-stained 'CLONE' banner zipping back up

Baphomet -- No offense.  But I'm gonna initiate these punks K-L-K style. -- TDH

Master Darque -- Be aware.  I'm bout to slap the taste out your former alliance mates 
mouths.  This isn't a request but a notification.  Sorry, Godfather.  But not even 
you can save these boys from the hell i got planned for them. -- TDH

Azrael -- Time to froth 'em up.  You know the routine. -- TDH

Wasby -- Thanks for the two challenges you sent and the two easy wins.  I'm always up 
to taking advantage of an eager student.  Plus you're saving me the trouble of 
challenging you.  If that's all you got...you might wanna take up Duelmasters the 
card game because I don't know if you can hang on the sands. -- TDH, doing a happy 
dance while kicking the crap out of every clone he sees

GOAT -- One more thing.  If you don't like TALK you'll really hate the boot I'm bout 
to place firmly up your ass.  Thinking of you, sunshine.  Xoxoxoxoxox -- TDH
P.S.  Awwww, who's my lil huckleberry?  <bitchslap>  God of War, Illuminati 
Alliance Puppetmaster

I am declaring my team Of Wolf and Man into the contest with ILLUMINATI. -- Tripwire, 
kLk Bringer of Pain

All -- I am not much of a talker, I will leave that to TDH and The Wordsmith, and the 
rest of my gang.  I just come to kick ass and chew bubble gum.  So for those that are 
kLk allies, I raise this beer to you brothers.  And for those that are kLk enemies, I 
will be bringing the pain very soon. [- Tripwire, kLk Bringer of Pain

All -- Oh yea, by the way, I am all outta bubble gum. -- Tripwire, kLk Bringer of 
Pain

ALL -- So some punks think they can talk trash to one of my boys; Not on my watch.  
You guys have no idea what you've started.  Ask Doomcorp what happens when you go to 
war with the kLk.  We won't stop till the coffin drops.  So get ready, clone boys, 
its war. -- PdiddykLk  Pimp ninja P kLk God of war
P.S.  Was that enough tags for you clone boys 

kLk -- Can we call this "The Clone Wars"? -- Pdiddyklk

Baphomet -- I am declaring for vendett@United for the upcoming Turf War.  My cert is 
on the way.  Let me know when you receive the cert. -- Dok Sik

Alarond the Scribe -- You mentioned in the spy report that you wanted to know what my 
warriors had for breakfast.  Well I believe they each had Raw Pheasant Eggs, Fried 
Lizard, Broiled Water Moccasin, and a mug of five year old Distilled Swamp Water, 
with a bowl of "Lucky Charms."  TASTY. -- Dok Sik

Jenna -- I commend you for the way you fought.  It was a one sided fight, but I have 
to thank you for letting me learn the skills that I did.  I can use them in the long 
run. -- Cyanide

Baphomet -- I declare for SCOMS Towers.  As Captain I have sent rollups for the team. 
-- Slugbait

Oz -- I guess it is Hourglass's turn to be DM next. -- Slugbait

Putrid Patrick finally gets his kill in the DA.

Drastardly Dake -- My bad I should have avoided.  Death is just a new rollup.  I only 
get mad when the rollup is bad. -- Slugbait

TW4 "Host" -- We are Misnomers and we declare for Mr. Coffee if he'll have us.  Our 
champion will be Hugh G.  Go til our blades cross... -- Heathen

Mr. Coffee -- I am here for the duration, so let's have some fun!  Are there any 
particular targets/rivalries I should take notice of or is it just a free for all?  
Either way I'm ready, my friend! -- Heathen

North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp? -- Hello all! -- Heathen, mgr. Misnomers

Aw Courage you old smoothie -- Underdog indeed!  Enjoy your "golden years", champ. -- 
Jabberwock

Maximillian -- Thanks (a million) for the memories.  Wish it was like old (80s) 
times, but I'm not as young as I used to be. -- Jabberwock

Oz -- "If Challenge"...kinda passive-aggressive? -- Snarkism

Blackstorm -- You're alright...but can you fight? -- Snark, Freedom

Jack/Jill -- (yawn) -- Titania/Neufchatella

Coffee -- A toast "to show our essence!" -- Snarkist (essentially no cream or sugar)

Galdr -- My pagan head hurts. -- Sting/Bombadil

Hammer -- Each recruit has *something* special! -- Snarking, never "darking"

Leetstreegle -- I like wind in my hair, not your blade. -- Grendel/Freman

Sho-time -- Welcome!  Swamp Shadows aren't on cable. -- Sho-nuff Snarky, showin off 
(It's just the way I am)

All in favor of (apparently) old-tyme personal-ad limit of 100 words, say "Aye!" -- 
Snarkyest (that Persistant Beggar can't even read!)

     Especially if all the html goop that comes with them is counted as words!
     By the way, if I have inadverntently thrown out a personal here and there with
     the goop, sorry.  Try sending plain text next time.  Ed. will appreciate that.
     -- Temp Ed.

Oz -- Remember the *Most Verbose* award?  Can I have it back.  It rightfully belongs 
to *HIM!* (points at Hammer and laughs) -- Baphomet

Hammer -- It is not lunacy, but Honour, which forced me to speak up in your behalf.  
That's what Brotherhood is about.  And, my alliance stands on such principles. -- 
Baphomet, Co-founder of The Company of Brothers

Mr. Coffee -- Thirty minutes in the Naughty Corner?  Too much caffeinne and watching 
the Super Nanny, huh? -- Baphomet
P.S.  Nice challenge wtih Robust Brew!

TDH -- klk klk DOOM?  What the froth? -- Baphomet (grinning)

Bgi Nose Kate -- Trust me, it's not TDH's cologne you don't like!  It's the swill 
he's been sloshing on himself in an effort to draw in Sir Chester's sister.  Folks 
around here call it Frothingslosh Swamp Juice.  He calls it beer! -- Baphomet 
(chuckling)

Clintonlikesbush -- I forgot to thank you for such an interesting fight we had a 
cuople of turns ago.  You verified my faves. -- Sir Galahad

Pavel Molari II -- Thank you for an interesting fight.  Indeed, should you wish to 
post a challenge...I await graciously.  You are welcome for the learns. -- Sir 
Galahad

Soul Seeker -- Finally, an opponent!  Yet, I retain my soul. -- Etienne Duplaix

Robust Brew -- What's with the cheap shot to the buttocks?!  You been hanging out 
with those folks from Draconic Realm? -- Amalric

Courage -- I was hoping that I'd get a chance to meet you on the sands before you 
graduated!  I salute your skill and wish you well in your retirement. -- Art 
Pendragon

Kentsui Fury -- Oooh...that fight told me a lot about you!  Or me!  Diplo enroute to 
discuss this fight. -- Ahura Mazda

Sir Chester -- I've already warned the rookies not to accept gifts from you or to go 
for rides in the park! -- Baphomet (grinning)

All -- I am a member of Vendett@United.  I do not support the Desolate Empire, nor do 
I claim the title of Dark Knight. -- ABRAXIS

Goat -- I am behind CFH 100% and will follow his lead in alliance matters. - ABRAXIS

Hammer -- I have always shown you all due respect.  Sure our newbies and my brother 
got out of hand.  Do you remember how I spouted off as a newbie?  Boys will be boys!  
Now, however, I must show you only what you deserve which is my ire!  As my will, so 
mote it be! -- ABRAXIS

Hammer -- I am deeply sorry to hear of your psychosis and of your coulrophobia!  It 
must be painful to see your deepest fear everywhere you turn.  It must also have been 
painful if my challenges got through.  As my will, so mote it be! -- ABRAXIS

BNK -- I, for one, would love to have you join us, but that's up to CFH! -- ABRAXIS

Maximillian -- My brother and Marvin still have that painting of you.  Maybe I can 
get them to bring it to TW4.  As my will, so mote it be! -- ABRAXIS

Baphomet -- Well my friend, I have made it to the swamp party with the chips and dip.  
The trip up here was something else, but Bubby Lee and I had a ball getting up here.  
The Illuminati huh?  Cool.  Hope they're vampire friendly. -- Liam the Goth, 
TCB...(R)ecruit

Axelrod -- I knowing this be late but good fight.  I be hexing you but I do believe 
we be on the same side. -- Dark Warlock

Rose Hammer -- A sly one you are, a first between our managers. -- Incubus the 
nonsmiling

All -- Hello to everyone in this gloomy, dark swamp.  Is the fishing any good? -- 
Liam *A bit confused as always*

Sir Chester -- Hum -- your kung-fu is strong. -- Liam, keeper of the black flame of 
Ahringol

Baphomet -- I, Liam the Goth, declare Gothic Ministry (592) for the TW4 under the 
banner of the Illuminati Alliance. -- Liam *dancing with his shadows*
P.S.  Incubus will be my champ.

Baphomet -- Got a team here.  Very hopeful to run with you guys.  Don't know if I'm 
"in" but the rollup should be coming your way.  don't know what kind of party this 
will be, but it's already rocking. -- Buddy Lee
P.S.  B.Y.O.B.

Baphomet -- I am decarling "Dark Pinnacle (598)" for Illuminati.  And my champion 
will be Steal Shank. -- Buddy Lee

TDH -- Hope to make the exception.  Don't nkow how it works.  Sorry made the party 
late.  Had to refinance.  Let the Assassination begin! -- Buddy Lee, TCB recruited

All -- I am Buddy Lee used to be known or unknown as Dincuru Feadagnor.  I am glad to 
be here.  Hope to compete with the best of you Swamp Dwellers.  Many of you have 
reputations.  That...I do respect.  But I am by all rights, a rookie still.  I "will" 
be foolish.  Hope to cross all non Illuminati. -- Buddy Lee, TCB recruited

Baphomet -- I am declaring my intentions to participate in the coming turf war as a 
member of the illuminati confederation.  I am Nemesis (formerly known as Turtle) and 
my team is Zoids. -- Nemesis

Vendetta Clones -- Oh, and you're marked for death by my forces as well. -- Nemesis

Turf War Tuffies -- The sands are shifting and a new attitude is prevailing upon the 
sands!  Talon Dark Hart and his band of newbie managers have welcomed Tripwire the 
Pain Bringer and Hammer the WordSmith and WeaponSmith as comrades in conflict 
wherever our sword arms thirst for vengeance! -- Hammer/kLk Minister of War and 
Illuminati Ice Pick of Irreconcilable Differences

Baphomet -- I am officially declaring the Second Bananas stable for the Fellowship of 
the SCOMS.  Please note that you had my stable listed as Soultaker's in the last 
newsletter, and vice versa. -- Mannequin, mgr Second Bananas

Oz the All Excited -- Thanks for the kudos!  While we are pleased by our recent 
success, we do realize we are a young team and that there are many fine warriors in 
the Swamp at this time.  We hope we continue to represent the Fellowship well in 
defense of our title. -- Second Bananas

Oz the Non-Oppressive -- Too many liberals?  Bah, don't you mean a couple of 
moderates and a Canadian?  :)  Doesn't the LEFT side of your brain control the 
thoughts and actions of the RIGHT side of your body?  :) -- Mannequin the Moderate

MSK -- We reserve the right to Bloodfued, if for no other reason than we're a little 
bummed that we have to find a replacement for Skippy in the next couple of months. -- 
Second Bananas

Cafe Au Lait -- You're pretty handy with that swizzle stick. Thanks for the skills, I 
hope to put them to good use in the tournament. -- Woody

Zombie Knight -- I expected our fight to last a bit longer than that.  I packed a 
lunch, but you didn't even make it to snack-time.  Better luck next time. -- Kramer

Mr Coffee -- Next Snail Letter is delayed.  I am now teaching English in a night 
class 4 times per week in addition to my duties at the school during the day.  Also, 
the March newsletter is 8 pages with 22 photos, so my regular columns were not 
written.  Will find something else to write your letter on the back of when I have 
Spring Break next week.  My schedule is busy and crowding out my DM time for writing 
Spots and P-ads! -- Hammer; the Illuminati Ice Pick of Interrupted Swamp Scribbling

Swamp Citizens -- Just letting you know that I am alive and well in Doha, Qatar. A 
couple of nights ago a suicide car bomber blasted a local theatre, killing the 
director and injuring several other people.  The local Islamic people here are 
shocked and publicly denounce the actions of the Egyptian engineer responsible for 
the terrorist attack.  One of the English teachers where I now teach a night course 
was at the theatre viewing a Shakespeare play when the explosion blew out the wall 
directly behind his seat.  He has been absent the past two nights due to damage to 
one of his ears.  I was at home using my computer when the explosion occurred and the 
blast shook our flat and rattled the doors, but thankfully the windows were not 
shattered.  An Islamic lady at the school where I work during the day had all the 
windows where she lives blown out by the blast.  Jesus is Lord and I thank you for 
your prayers in behalf of everyone who has been affected by this shocking and 
unexpected act of terrorism. -- Hammer; the Illuminati Ice Pick of International 
Information

1 March 2005
                                    The Contract
                         [as retold by Hammer the WordSmith]
     What had begun as a contract for swords and armor between a well known name in
the DM community and the former VC Captain/WordSmith and WeaponSmith of the Vendetta
Cartel Tarantula Tribe was destined to impact and altar the landscape of the dueling
community for years to come.
     The following is but a condensed retelling of history in the making.

    Hammer continued sipping his tankard of Elven Tonic as the mysterious hooded
figure quietly seated himself across the table from the Veteran Manager whose back
was against the wall; allowing for a subtle, but effective surveillance of the dimly
lit tavern.
     Recent events in both Illis and North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp Arena had stunned the DM
managerial world with the announcement that Hammer had resigned from his position as
a well respected member of the Vendetta Cartel Alliance.
     Those managers and associates closest to Hammer were shocked and dismayed that
there seemed to be NO Rational Explanation for Hammer making such a seemingly
irrational, hasty and extremely illogical decision; by what seemed to be a spur of
the moment reaction following the Declaration of War by Hammer in the DM 47 P-ads.
     This is what stirred the mysterious hooded figure to seek Hammer with a request
that would change the managerial course of both men; ultimately Rocking the
Managerial World of Alastari as a result of the forthcoming decisions reached by the
two Veterans.
     Time passed swiftly as both Veteran Managers discussed how the landscape of the
DM game on the sands of Alastari had changed over the years both in Basic and Tourney
play; producing a new breed of managers who would of necessity band together in an
alliance with a common goal; waging war against antagonists while improving the
managerial skills of each participating member in their glorious quest for DM
excellence.
     Hammer listened intently as his unexpected guest inquired about the situation in
North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp Arena; revealing his desire to participate in the upcoming
Turf War 4 contest in DM 47 with an alliance that would accept him on a more
permanent basis other than for just fighting together as a TW4 alliance to win fame
and Gift Certs.
     Here was a Veteran Manager, seeking the advice of Hammer regarding an alliance
to join on a permanent basis; plus extending a sword arm of friendship and requesting
that Hammer join him as an alliance mate with those who would welcome their
membership.
     The Iron in the Words of Hammer had produced this opportunity as a result of the
recent conflicts witnessed first hand by the manager seated across the table from
Hammer.  This Veteran Manager had been secretly searching and scouting around
Alastari for someone worth his mettle to fight alongside; someone who would know
where to find the perfect gang of rebels who were unafraid of waging war against
anyone.
     Hammer knew exactly where to look and in a matter of days the two newcomers were
welcomed into the ranks of a group of managers who received them as war waging equals
in an alliance that had joined a Confederation of Alliances for the TW4 contest.
     Fighting under the banner of The Illuminati Confederation of Alliances alongside
members of Chaos Inc, kLk and The Company of Brothers during the TW4 was more than
either of the two Veteran Managers had envisioned a few months ago.
     Hammer was now entering a new journey with a new attitude.
     Perhaps you readers may have noticed that new attitude by now since this
announcement by Hammer is uncharacteristically Exclamation Point Free.
     Except for the famous quote by Hammer at the end of this announcement.
     Now that Hammer and the Mysterious Hooded Figure have agreed to join forces with
an alliance whose members have welcomed them enthusiastically; let those who desire
to be antagonistic be forewarned as to the identities of these newly welcomed wagers
of war:

Tripwire
kLk Bringer of Pain

Hammer
kLk WordSmith and WeaponSmith
Minister of War
Illuminati Idealist

     "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper!"

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

AMAZON JANE was dealt death by GUILLOTINE GARTH in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
SEALAB 2021 was dealt death by THE BARTENDER in a 2 minute Dark Arena duel.
9121111151313 was narrowly killed by MURDEROUS MARK in a 2 minute Dark Arena melee.
REJECTED BY GOD was dispatched by MURDEROUS MARK in a 1 minute Dark Arena brawl.
DA47 was assassinated by BAPHOMET in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena match.
VENDETTA CLOWN was butchered by WURM KIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
MISS RIP OFF was slain by THE BARTENDER in a 3 minute brutal Dark Arena struggle.
DA was butchered by BAPHOMET in a 1 minute Dark Arena competition.
LIL MS PIKER was assassinated by MR. COFFEE in a 1 minute Dark Arena melee.
HUMAN SACRIFICE was slaughtered by PUTRID PATRICK in a 1 minute gory Dark Arena duel.
DEEP FRIED LARD slaughtered DRASTARDY DAKE in a 2 minute one-sided Bloodfeud duel.
SOUL SEEKER was assassinated by DEVOUT CHRISTIAN in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud match.
WOODY was overpowered by MSK in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud fight.
GRENDEL was demolished by SWAMP TRAP HAMMER in a 2 minute Bloodfeud competition.
LEVIATHAN OF LARD viciously subdued ART PENDRAGON in a 3 minute Challenge battle.
ACE METRIC handily defeated GALDR in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge conflict.
BEAR NEKKID won victory over MAHARA in a 2 minute Challenge bout.
SIR GALAHAD unbelievably bested HUMBUG in a action packed 2 minute Challenge duel.
AHURA MAZDA devastated SWEET N LOW in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
JACK & JILL was savagely defeated by LEET STREEGLE in a 4 minute Challenge bout.
KENTSUI FURY was outlasted by LITTLE BIG MAN in a 7 minute Challenge match.
GANGSTA CREEP overpowered FRED BEAR in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge conflict.
DON KING devastated JACK MCFARLAND in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
WHITE SETTLER viciously subdued APPIUS in a 1 minute gory Challenge match.
CAFE AU LAIT was handily defeated by EBOLA (Z) in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
ANTHRAX was devastated by BENDER in a popular 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
JIM JONES was assassinated by DEAD ANGLE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
BLACK BALL defeated CAPPUCCINO in a 3 minute novice's Challenge duel.
PICUS was defeated by NIGHT TERROR in a 2 minute brutal beginner's Challenge match.
SHADOW was dispatched by SWAMP BURP HAMMER in a 1 minute novice's Challenge fray.
DAY DREAM was savagely defeated by CRISTER MOFFEE in a 1 minute Challenge competition.
TRESSA won victory over BROCK SAMPSON in a 1 minute novice's Challenge fray.
WAR CRY HAMM beat SON YUNG MOON in a 2 minute novice's Challenge match.
AXELROD GUNNER was outlasted by BLACK THUNDER in a tiresome 7 minute Challenge bout.
WILSON beat SWAMP CLAW HAMMER in a crowd pleasing 1 minute novice's Challenge fray.
AMALRIC was unbelievably bested by FREEZE DRIED in a 5 minute Challenge fight.
HANTA was beaten by SWAMP LILY HAMMER in a exciting 5 minute novice's Challenge fray.
DARK WARLOCK viciously subdued SWAMP ROSE HAMMER in a 7 minute Challenge match.
ERON RIPPER was overpowered by IMMAZAEL in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
CYANIDE handily defeated BADI AL ZAMAN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
DIPTHERIA defeated ETIENNE DUPLAIX in a 1 minute beginner's Challenge battle.
TSO TSUNG T'ANG lost to MIDGUARD in a 2 minute novice's Challenge struggle.
RAINBOW overcame SPAWING OF SPEWN in a exciting 1 minute mismatched fight.
HOURGLASS overcame JABBERWOCK in a 2 minute master's melee.
JENNA demolished LEPPADA in a 1 minute brutal one-sided match.
TOTO savagely defeated RAVEN in a 3 minute gory duel.
WYRD overpowered MINOR BLUE in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
MARAJUANA MAN handily defeated FIGHTING TREE in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
STING subdued DASTER MARQUE in a exciting 4 minute conflict.
GAFF was demolished by PAUL BEARER in a popular 1 minute one-sided battle.
KOZYTA was unbelievably bested by CLINTONLIKESBUSH in a 3 minute bloody contest.
ZOMBIE KNIGHT luckily beat HALLE BEARY in a exciting 3 minute brutal struggle.
B.B. CROSS butchered FAMILY GUY in a 1 minute mismatched fight.
VASH THE STAMPEDE was narrowly defeated by FAJR FALAK in a 2 minute bloody battle.
BLOOD RAYNE was viciously subdued by LADY ARCANE in a popular 4 minute gruesome bout.
TITANIA devastated MORDANT DESERTER in a 2 minute one-sided fight.
EVICSERATOR bested CHARLES MANSON in a crowd pleasing 3 minute conflict.
MELON MUSH beat SHADOW RAINS in a popular 3 minute match.
DAVID KARESH was vanquished by SUZANNE in a exciting 1 minute mismatched match.
ANTON LEVAY easily killed CLOCKWORK ORANGE in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
GENESIS was overpowered by DROPSHOT in a 1 minute mismatched bout.
INCUBUS murdered WEAKNESS in a 1 minute uneven duel.
ROBUST BREW was beaten by STELLA in a 2 minute novice's fight.
BEAR SKINRUG overpowered LIAM in a 1 minute uneven melee.
DRAMA QUEEN beat CARRION WURM in a 5 minute novice's battle.
LIL BIT vanquished LADY SCALE in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
OBLIVION devastated CRYPT ANGEL in a 1 minute bloody uneven match.
DEMONIC HEX beat SHORTEST STRAW in a popular 1 minute novice's match.
BLACKENED defeated HITLER YOUTH in a 1 minute novice's fight.
ONE bested SHADE'S FORM in a 1 minute amateur's duel.
JUSTICE FOR ALL overpowered CHARLOTTE in a 1 minute brutal one-sided conflict.
DYERS EVE was vanquished by FRYLOCKE in a 1 minute one-sided brawl.
TARZAN was overpowered by ZYKLON in a 1 minute uneven fight.
FEL STRIKE was handily defeated by CARLOTTA in a 1 minute mismatched match.
BRASSBACK was vanquished by ZOMBIE ASSASSIN in a 1 minute uneven match.
BONDS ON 'ROIDS overpowered ROWAN in a 1 minute mismatched bout.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                 30         PARRY-LUNGE       18 -  10 -  0      64  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  21         WALL OF STEEL     47 -  40 -  1      54  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  20         TOTAL PARRY       96 -  82 -  2      54  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                 19         AIMED BLOW        51 -  44 -  1      54  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     15         SLASHING ATTACK   70 -  71 -  8      50  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   13         STRIKING ATTACK  104 - 113 - 10      48  |
|AIMED BLOW                       9         LUNGING ATTACK    70 -  88 -  8      44  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     6         BASHING ATTACK    58 -  95 -  3      38  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    6         PARRY-RIPOSTE     15 -  26 -  0      37  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      2         PARRY-STRIKE      14 -  27 -  0      34  |

Turn 222 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

TOTAL PARRY       12 -  3     SLASHING ATTACK    9 - 10         3  LUNGING ATTACK 
WALL OF STEEL      8 -  5     STRIKING ATTACK   13 - 17         3  WALL OF STEEL  
LUNGING ATTACK    12 -  9     PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  4         2  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  1     PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  4         1  TOTAL PARRY    
                              BASHING ATTACK     5 - 15         1  AIMED BLOW     
                              AIMED BLOW         2 -  7         1  BASHING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
LUNGING ATTACK   LEVIATHAN OF LARD 5113     16   5  2  124 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
WALL OF STEEL    HOURGLASS 5127             17   2  0  118 LAND OF OZ (217)
BASHING ATTACK   WYRD 5167                  10   3  0   93 THE JESUITS (524)
STRIKING ATTACK  SPAWING OF SPEWN 5197      10   3  0   93 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
SLASHING ATTACK  ACE METRIC 3554             6   4  0   85 ROYAL FLUSH (48)
AIMED BLOW       GALDR 5171                  7   5  1   63 THE JESUITS (524)
TOTAL PARRY      STING 2724                 13   9  0   59 NEMESIS (32)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    BEAR NEKKID 5126           10   8  0   46 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is AHURA MAZDA 5152.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was DASTER MARQUE 5196.  The ten other most popular fighters were LADY ARCANE 
4381, LEVIATHAN OF LARD 5113, LEET STREEGLE 5368, HALLE BEARY 5312, HUMBUG 5199, 
SWAMP LILY HAMMER 5441, CHARLES MANSON 5428, SHADOW RAINS 5405, AMALRIC 5378, and 
9121111151313 5545.

The least popular fighter this week was KENTSUI FURY 4382.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were BLACK THUNDER 3885, SWAMP ROSE HAMMER 5440, DRAMA QUEEN 5494, 
JACK & JILL 5310, ROWAN 5563, BRASSBACK 5544, FEL STRIKE 5516, TARZAN 5542, DYERS EVE 
5535, and SHADE'S FORM 5549.

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

RAINBOW (47-4553) LAND OF OZ (217)
DEEP FRIED LARD (47-4975) MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)