Date   : 05/17/2005    Duedate: 06/13/2005


DM-47    TURN-224

This Weeks Top Honors


(47-4561) [16-13-1,114]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

SKELETON KEY (493)             THE RIPPER CREW (489)
(47-4561) [16-13-1,114]        (47-4381) [5-2-1,56]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

AHURA MAZDA                    AHURA MAZDA
(47-5152) [7-9-1,49]           (47-5152) [7-9-1,49]



Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. SECOND BANANAS (573)        52
2. ADULT SWIM (589)            45      MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
3. COFFEE RULES! (505)         40      Unchartered Team
4. NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)  37
5. ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)     30      ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1- 1*OF WOLF AND MAN (603)      7   3  0 70.0   1/ 5 SECOND BANANAS (573)     11  3 2
 2/ 2 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   264 157 21 62.7   2/ 2 NATURAL B. KILLERS (584) 11  4 1
 3/ 3 LAND OF OZ (217)         437 285 14 60.5   3/ 1 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   10  3 1
 4- 5*MAYFAIR (607)              3   2  0 60.0   4/13*ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)   9  6 1
 5- 6*CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (609)    3   2  0 60.0   5-10*OF WOLF AND MAN (603)     7  3 0
 6/ 8 NATURAL B. KILLERS (584)  30  22  4 57.7   6/21 SKELETON KEY (493)        7  3 0
 7/21*ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)   14  11  3 56.0   7/ 3 LAND OF OZ (217)          7  4 1
 8-10 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         582 461 30 55.8   8/16*SALEM'S LOT (605)         7  6 2
 9/ 9 FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)     31  25  5 55.4   9/22*FALLEN (590)              7  8 2
10/16 SECOND BANANAS (573)      43  35  4 55.1  10/ 6*LEADERS (593)             7  8 1
11/ 4*LEADERS (593)             11   9  1 55.0  11/14*GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)     6  7 1
12/11 COFFEE RULES! (505)      130 109  5 54.4  12/ 7 BLACK STORM (171)         6  8 0
13/22*SALEM'S LOT (605)          7   6  2 53.8  13/ 9 FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)     6  9 1
14/12 LIFE'S LESSONS (562)      93  80  5 53.8  14/18*SOULFORGE (587)           6  9 0
15/14 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)     307 277 30 52.6  15/12*MAESTUS MORTALES (588)    6  9 0
16/13 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)   35  33  2 51.5  16/15*ADULT SWIM (589)          6  9 0
17/17 SKELETON KEY (493)        85  81  3 51.2  17/19 COFFEE RULES! (505)       6  9 0
18/18 FREEDONIA (32)           140 139 15 50.2  18/11*DOK SIK KILLAS (595)      6  9 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/15*DOK SIK KILLAS (595)      12  12  2 50.0  19- 4 ROYAL FLUSH (48)          5  3 0
20/19 BLACK STORM (171)         70  73  8 49.0  20/25 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)      5  5 0
21/20*THE RIPPER CREW (489)     17  18  1 48.6  21- 8 DESOLATE ONES (524)       5  5 0
22/23*MAESTUS MORTALES (588)    16  18  0 47.1  22/31 FREEDONIA (32)            5 10 2
23/ 0*CHAOTIX BEASTS (610)      12  14  2 46.2  23/20 KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)     5 10 0
24-25 DESOLATE ONES (524)       69  85 12 44.8  24/24 LIFE'S LESSONS (562)      4  1 0
25/34*FALLEN (590)               8  10  2 44.4  25/30*THE RIPPER CREW (489)     4  6 1
26/26 DARK PINNACLE (598)       18  23  3 43.9  26/29 DARK PINNACLE (598)       4  7 1
27-27 ROYAL COMATENTS (301)     56  74  2 43.1  27/17 MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)   4  9 0
28/30*DRACONIC REALM (519)      11  15  0 42.3  28-28*MAYFAIR (607)             3  2 0
29/29 TREBORS (232)             80 114  8 41.2  29-27*CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (609)   3  2 0
30/24*GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)      9  13  1 40.9  30/33*BLEAK LEGION (601)        3  6 0
31/31*ADULT SWIM (589)          12  18  0 40.0  31/32*MISNOMERS (608)           3  7 0
32/33 KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)     32  51  2 38.6  32-23*THE DREAMING (591)        2  8 1
33/35*SOULFORGE (587)           12  22  2 35.3  33/36*DRACONIC REALM (519)      1  2 0
34/36*BLEAK LEGION (601)         3   6  0 33.3  34/ 0*CHAOTIX BEASTS (610)      1  4 0
35/32*MISNOMERS (608)            3   7  0 30.0  35/35 TREBORS (232)             0  6 0
36-37*THE DREAMING (591)         4  16  1 20.0  36-38 ROYAL COMATENTS (301)     0  1 0
37-39*ZOIDS (606)                0   1  0  0.0  37-39*ZOIDS (606)               0  1 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

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To our contest host,

     A few questions regarding scoring in the contest have surfaced on the Duel2
site.  No one can answer these 100% accurately except you, the contest moderator.  I
wasn't sure if you had net access, so I have organized them here for you to answer
before the contest begins.  I figure clarification of the posted rules now will
insure a smooth running of the Turf War IV.
     1:  In the rules posted on the forums it states that the contest will end turn
237 (12 turns).  The start of the contest is posted as Turn 225.  225-237 is 13
turns.  Just confirming the starting turn of the contest as turn 225.
     2:  If you declare your team in the Personal Ads on say turn 224 (the turn
before the start) but don't actually have the team there yet, it is still in the
contest and can start when it arrives correct?  I.e., if you decide you want to fight
your rookies at the face and enter turn 227 you can do so?  The rules state that you
have to declare your team before turn 235.  Was this a typo?  Did you mean to say
     3:  Does a team begin scoring its first turn in the arena?  Or does it have to
wait until the turn after it arrives?
     4:  Each mention of your team in the spy report gets you +5 points according to
the rules.  So if I go 0-5 and my team gets mentioned.  Or I get mentioned for
avoiding another team, I get the +5 still?
     5:  As I read the rules it states a champion can be declared as long as it is
below adept on turn 224.  Does this mean I can declare a champion at any time during
the contest if I desire?  Say a warrior comes into his own 5 turns into the contest
and is below adept.  Can I then declare him my champion and start garnering the x2?
     6:  It states bloodfeuds count for all four turns.  But the same warrior may not
bloodfeud all four turns or you lose ten points.  Does this mean I can BF with one
guy three times and another one time?  Or does this mean a different warrior each of
the four turns?
     7:  Is it correct to interpret the rules as saying the DA may be used on 0 FE
warriors only?
     8:  TV's and TC's get x3 and x10 points for the entire contest.  So if my
declared champion TC's he will get x10 points, then x2 for being champion, or does
the x10 override the x2?
     Most of these questions originate from one source, but no one was able to answer
them with certainty.  These are all that I have as of 5/2/05.  If any more are posted
on the Duel2 site between now and the next turn, I will post them in the p-ads.

Master Darque


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     Azraelus cloaked himself as he stepped through the Dream he had created for the
V@U clowns.  Channeling Spirit and using what P had begun teaching him, in the Dream
he had created the illusion that their alliance house was still together.  He grinned
as he listened to them talk of making Hammer look like a clown.  Too bad for them the
reality of that situation.  This one is speaking now, what is his name again?  Waspy,
yes.  His mind was concocting a story of controlling Azrael's mind and having him
destroy the Illuminati chapter house.  Funny that, as the construction was not due to
start for at least two more weeks.
     "And he was shaking a dead rat...." Waspy intoned.
     Azraelus smirked.  The arcanum was so pathetic compared to the natural wonder of
channeling the Godsource.  Spells and base magic.  Ridiculous.  Weave the Five Powers
and be a god amongst insects.  The little fool spoke of compulsion.  He would show
this child true Compulsion.  No, the crushing defeat of his enemies would be sweeter
if they controlled their own minds.  They would pay for the attack on his manor home
in Jhans.
      He shifted the Dream as he left.  The clowns were instantly in the ruins of
their alliance house, just as it was in the waking world.  They were surrounded by
their worst fears as the giant Hammer came crashing down.
     Azraelus smiled as he heard the horrified screams of the Dark Knights.  It was
the first one in days.


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						    Swamp Scribbling
						 by Hammer the WordSmith

     HAMMER HANDED THE NOTE to the startled PAPER FLOWER who had just witnessed first
hand the entrance of the veteran manager via one of his now famous Elven Orbs of
     After hastily reading the note, the gladiator acknowledged the request of Liam
The Goth to surrender the Sacred Scimitar into the care of Hammer for immediate
transport to North Fork/SCOMSS Swamp Arena for the upcoming Turf War 4 contest.
     In spite of the instructions from his manager, PAPER FLOWER was no less unnerved
by the dramatic exit of he who was now known as the Illuminati Ice Pick amongst his
new found confederation of alliances mates.
     The bag of gold that Hammer had left in the place from where he was standing
mere moments ago assured that the gladiator was well compensated for the experience!

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     I am Boca Mierda K-Lown K-ronicles reporter extraordinare.  I am here to report
upon the many rumors floating around this dingy SCOMSS Swamp.  First, of many rumors
that have reached my ears is that no one in the klk is satisfied with their current
title.  Everyone wants to be a god, and not just a god, but a god of war.  My inside
informant also tells me that the members of klk are chafing at the puppet master's
strings.  These are the words of one member who was so chafed by the controlling,
over-obsessive tyrant, that he was willing to talk to me personally, even knowing the
penalties of playing the man-role in an alliance full of fluffers.  "I am tired of
him (TDH) always pulling our strings.  I'm nothing but a DAMN puppet!!" he said
through clenched teeth with tears flowing freely as he adjusted his halter top and
     Enough on peoples' comments and their answers to the rumors for now.  I'll save
more for next week.
     Now on to my own questions.  So klk, who is the klk God of War?  All?  One?  Or
none!!  Who is the bringer of pain?  Hummer's life partner?  Are they confused?  Has
Hummer's yellow puddle dried up yet, or has it just gotten bigger?  Does he have any
more excuses to give his newest but veteran sucker recruit why he is all used up?
Punkdiddylimp the lame click, click.doom fizzle, can he remember how much it takes to
cause unconsciousness?  Even the DOOMcorps says he's delusional.  No wonder!!
     t.d.h. is still trying to explain to the gladiator commission on how a veteran
manager keeps his lips and eyes looking like he just got trained by a member of v@U.
Rumor has it that t.d.h. is now in hiding with Hummer and helping the washed up
manager try and gain back some guts, while hiring a scribe to come up with stories,
since Hummer's hands are so shaky that he can't even hold a pen.  Who knows, my
informant, being a member of the klk alliance and a sellout, (no wonder klk allowed
Hummer into their alliance, it's already full of lames and sellouts, what's one
more.) is totally reliable (due to my gold coins) and will update me every week so I
can report to you, all my soon-to-be supporting public.  I, Boca Mierda, will always
give to you straight up, so with these parting words; don't talk no trash, won't be
no trash.  I bid you fare ye well, until next time....

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     As the tankards clanked together in their salute to defeating their enemies, a
loud banging began to sound upon the oaken, steel-bound door of the V@U guildhouse.
As the noise began to increase in decibels...Wasby, Goat and Toker went to
     As they approached the hall, the door splintered inward, showering shards of
timber inward.  The managers were forced down to the floor in order to escape the
deadly onslaught of steel and wooden splinters the size of boards.  Dust flew inward
as if they were standing in the middle of a desert sand storm.  The thickness of the
dust was not only stifling, but chokingly so, causing their eyes to water and their
throats to constrict with coughing fits.
     As the dust settled, Wasby and Toker looked toward the door to see what had
caused the chaos in the guildhouse.  Standing just inside the door was a sight they'd
never seen.  A best of such proportions that it not only appeared human...but inhuman
as well.  About its head was a mass of black curly hair; two horns jutted out from
its forehead.  Upon its chin grew a long, curly black beard to its waist.  Its chest
was twice the width and breadth of a normal man's, and was completely devoid of hair.
Its arms were huge, like two tree trunks.  About its waist was a wide belt with human
hair hanging from it, still bloody from being ripped from its former owner.  The
beast's skin was the color of copper, as if it had spent its life in the sun and saw
no shade.
     Looking upon the beast, their hearts were struck with a soul-wrenching fear.
They knew they were about to be sent to Ahringol.  Yet the monster merely swatted
them out of its way and continued past them.  Turning around they saw its
destination.  Goat was pinned to the back wall by a beam of wood thrust through both
     Grabbing their weapons, they began to attack the monster.  Yet each stroke they
took seemed to fall into nothingness.  How could this be?  They were warriors!  What
was this thing that could not be harmed?  Was it a god?  Was it a Chaos Demon?  What
could it be?!
     As the beast reached Goat, the monster grabbed the front of Goat's tunic and
ripped his body from the wall.  Pulling him up to eye level, the monster began to
speak.  "I warned you in Illis what would happen if you continued your disrespect.
And, now I have unleashed the War Beast from within me.  You and these whom you
depend upon have not an iota of a chance in defeating me...let alone the Illuminati
Confederation of Alliances.  I will rip your head from your body, and allow mine to
drink of your blood.  And I will feast upon the flesh that is left over.  You have
brought this upon yourself and those you hold allegiance to.  Magic is no good
against me, and you have neither the strength nor the fortitude to defeat me.  Now
face Baphomet the Illuminati War Beast!!!  For, I have *COME!*

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Hello and welcome to Heathen's Cafe!

     Come on in.  Enjoy some of Mr. Coffee's fine brew.  And partake in one of the
many discussions that may be ongoing at any time here.
     Heathen's Cafe is reminiscent of the European cafes during the Age of
Enlightenment, where the dissemination of ideas and theories were debated by some of
the greatest minds the world has ever known.  With this spotlight I propose the
sharing of information about this great game we all have a fondness for.  No question
is too big or small.  No answer is beyond imagination or theory unworthy of print,
for each and every one should be recognized as important to gaining knowledge of the
     Therefore, I prompt ALL of you, from the wise and wily veteran (Oz, Crip, etc.)
to the newest of managers to ask and/or answer any question posed in this spotlight.
Let's all support the dissemination of knowledge, in spite of (or perhaps because of)
the fierce competition the Turf War always brings about.
     To begin I will pose a question I've considered for a while now, namely, does
anyone think armor is style-dependent or just not as important to some styles as it
is to others?  Why do I ask?
     I've run a couple of experimental TPs and during the course of these experiments
I had reason (or not as the case may be) to send them out offensively, with no armor,
high OE/AL.  Two in particular caught my attention, because they both could take a
"tremendous amount of damage" and yet every time they were run without armor, they
surrendered after only two hits!  Whereas I have offensive style warriors, who are
listed as "cannot take a lot of punishment" and more often than not it takes five or
six hits to make them submit.
     So, all things being equal does anyone think a TP MUST wear armor to be
effective, while a Lunger is more successful without it?  Why?  Anyone?

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                                 *TURF WAR IV RULES*

     Well, folks...we start banging heads next turn (225)!  So, once again...here are
the rules:

Everyone may participate; known alliances, new alliances, or temporary alliances
created to compete in the Turf War!  However, to participate, each alliance must:

A.  Announce the alliance and the Captain of the alliance in the SCOMSS Swamp
     Captains are responsible for:
  a.  Verifying those who wish to participate under the banner of their alliance;
  b.  Distribution of prizes should their alliance win the Turf War.

     Managers must:
  a.  Submit one (1) RSI Roll-Up Gift Certificate to participate;
  b.  Announce their intent to compete with manager name, team name and alliance in
      which they will be fighting in the SCOMSS Swamp newsletter.

1.  No scoring will begin until a Gift Cert is received.  No exceptions.
2.  Before a manager can compete, he/she must declare and be verified by the Captain
    of the alliance he/she has claimed for;
3.  Only one (1) team per player may compete.  No multiple aliases please.
    (Violations will result in disqualification).
4.  The contest will end on turn 237 (12 turns).  Winners will be announced on Turn
5.  The turn following a declaration and verification will begin the scoring process.
6.  No declarations or verifications will be accepted after Turn 235.
7.  For the purpose of scoring, I reserve the right to make all final decisions.

                                Win     Loss     Kill   Die
Challenge                        +2       -2       +5    -5
Match-Up                         +1       -1       +1    -5
Bloodfeud                        +2       -5       +5   -10
Champion                         x2       x2       x2    x2
Downchallenges                   +2       -5       +2   -10
Dark Arena                      +10       -5       xx    xx

**  The Loss and Die scores are for the offending down-challenging.  Otherwise...it's
scored as a challenge.
     A downchallenge is considered from a higher bracket to a lower bracket.  As long
as warriors are in the same bracket...it's a regular challenge regardless of
recognition points.

Special Scoring:
     a.  Each mention in the Spy Report is worth 5 points (team mentions only).
     b.  Each Style Master is worth 5 points.

     a.  Champions may be declared, but are not mandatory.  If declared, the Champion
         must be in the Adepts or lower brackets on turn 224.

     a.  Bloodfeuds count for all four (4) turns.  However, the same warrior may not
         BF all four turns.  A penalty of -10 will be given to the team who violates

Special Conditions:
     a.  I reserve the right for all final decisions.
     b.  If I make a mistake, I'll multiply the points by 2.
     c.  If you claim I did, and *YOU* are wrong, I'll subtract points at the rate of
     d.  Each alliance begins with zero (0) points.
     e.  Dark Arena may be used on the first turn of every warrior with no penalty
         (this means a *WARRIOR'S* fight!).
     f.  TVs won after the contest begins gain a Triple Rate of scoring once the
         tourney reports are posted in the NL and run throughout the remainder of the
     g.  TCs won after the contest begins gain a rate of scoring of x10 with the same
         conditions as TVs.
     h.  No switching alliances once verified by an alliance that a team has declared
         for.  (Obviously...this begins when the contest does.)

     Any questions or concerns may be addressed (if you're incarcerated) to:
Baphomet, mgr. Knights Templar (568), Dm #47 -- SCOMSS Swamp.  If free world player,
you may write to:

Rick Stringer -- Merit/East
SCI  P.O. Box 500
Georgetown, DE  19947-0500

Prizes are:
     a.  100% of the rollups
     b.  I'm waiting to hear from RSI regarding arena name change and monster name
     c.  A special prize that I will discuss with the Captain of the winning alliance

Baphomet, mgr. Knights Templar
Host of Turf War IV

P.S.  Downchallenges are not down in points, but higher to lower bracket.  Same
bracket?  Normal challenge regardless of recognition points.

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                                 *Turf War Up-Dates*

     A couple of announcements I need to make:

A.  Abraxis...I will list you as the new Captain for V@U, but if CFH comes in next
    turn and tells me he's still the Captain, then that's how it is.  He started it
    off and that's how it is.

B.  If I receive a cert from you, I report it here.  There's really no need to ask me
    if I got it.  These are recorded up until the date of reception of Turn results.
    I sent them out the same day.

Okay, here's what I've got for declarations and verifications so far!

Alliance/Manager/Champion                           TTL  LT  d  v  c

*VENDETTA CARTEL/Kat, Cpt.                          (0), (0)  d  v  cert?
     The Bear's Paw/Kat                             (0), (0)  y  y  n
     Managerial Mayhem/Fizban                       (0), (0)  y  y  n
     Natural B. Killers/Maximillian                 (0), (0)  y  y  n

*VENDETT@UNITED/CFH, Cpt.                           (0), (0)  d  v  cert?
     Rat Salad/CFH/Baby                             (0), (0)  y  y  n
     Leaders/Abraxis/Mr. Crowley                    (0), (0)  y  y  n
     The Jesuits/Goat                               (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Vincere Aut Mori/Toker/Gangsta Creep           (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Soulforge/Wasby the Great/                     (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Dok Sik Killas/Dok Sik                         (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Dark-Side/Sho-Time                             (0), (0)  y  y  n
     Skeleton Key/Skullagrim                        (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Mayfair/Lasher                                 (0), (0)  y  n  n

*T.A.T.I.O.A.H.C./Mr. Coffee, Cpt.                  (0), (0)  d  v  cert?
     Coffee Rules!/Mr. Coffee                       (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Misnomers/Heathen/Hugh G Go                    (0), (0)  y  y  y

*SCOMS TOWER/Slugbait, Cpt.                         (0), (0)  d  v  cert?
     Mystic Orc Feast/Slugbait                      (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Royal Flush/Crip                               (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Land of Oz/Oz                                  (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Second Bananas/Mannequin                       (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Old Habits/Father O'Malley (Soultaker)         (0), (0)  y  y  y

*ILLUMINATI/Talon Darkhart, Cpt.                    (0), (0)  d  v  cert?
     Adult Swim/TDH/Bender                          (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Draconic Realm/Sir Chester/Arauthator          (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Fallen/Azrael/Lil Bit                          (0), (0)  y  y  y
     The Dreaming/P-Diddy/Dead Angle                (0), (0)  y  y  y
     All-Swamp Hammerz/Hammer/Swamp Lily Hammer     (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Palindromes/Assurnasirbanipal                  (0), (0)  y  y  y
     The Ripper Crew/Noachian                       (0), (0)  y  y  n
     Of Wolf and Men/Tripwire                       (0), (0)  y  y  n
     Zoids/Nemesis                                  (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Knights Templar/Baphomet                       (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Gothic Ministry/Liam the Goth/Incubus          (0), (0)  y  y  y
     Dark Pinnacle/Buddy Lee/Steal Shank            (0), (0)  y  y  y

     Well folks...there you have it.  Feel free to ask questions and clarification.

-- Baphomet, host

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                        ---===FREE BLADES REGIONAL NEWS===---

 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 515): BLUE SUEDE of BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 515): CAT TAGIOUS of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 509): LIL E. TEE of TRIPLE CROWN (Sultan, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 511): GOLDENROD of GOLDEN GLADIATORS (Midas, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 509): ACHILLES of HEROESANDFOUNDONES (The Judge, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 508): JERRY ATTRICKS of FUNKY FOLK (Papa Bear, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 254): DAISY HAMMER of FLOWER HAMMERZ (Hammer, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 500): ENOSHIMA of BLACK SAMURAI (Doc Miracle, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 251): REZOS THE THRACIAN of OVERLORDS (The Icelord, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 497): SAVORY of SARATOGA GLORY (The Trainer, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 495): SILK of PATH OF THE BLADE (Vhagar, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 488): ZEBZAMBEZI of PHILANTHROPISTS (Aragorn, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 450): VAHNZUR of THE FAMILY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 229): HOT LIPS of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 210): YAIWE of DARK SIDHE (Daehir, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 376): HEDGEHOG of REDHORSE (Mila, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 355): TAIL IN THE AIR of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 159): DEMOGORGON of BAATANAR'RITEZU (Asmo Dius, mgr.)
                                Warsmith, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
 DM   9 ZUKAL (turn 515): BLUE MOON (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 515): DREAMERS (Sleepy, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 509): STARBASE 5 (Zeus, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 511): DAGGERS EDGE (Zeus, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 509): HEROESANDFOUNDONES (The Judge, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 508): THE MAGNIFICENT MAGS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 254): BAD GERMS (Assurnasirbanipal, mgr.)
 DM  29 LAPUR (turn 500): EQUESTORS (Spartacus, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 251): NUMBERS GAME (Destitute Noble, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 497): SARATOGA GLORY (The Trainer, mgr.)
 DM  33 NIATOLI ISLAND (turn 495): KLKASINO HAMMERZ (Hammer, mgr.)
 DM  35 MURSKA (turn 488): CHILDREN OF LLYR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 450): THE FAMILY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 229): none
 DM  47 SCOMSS SWAMP (turn 223): MYSTIC ORC FEAST (Slugbait, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 210): DARK SIDHE (Daehir, mgr.)
 DM  56 ROCANIS (turn 376): REDHORSE (Mila, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 355): FAVORITE GUYS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 159): BAATANAR'RITEZU (Asmo Dius, mgr.)
ADM 103 FREE BLADES (turn 401): LAFFALYMPICS, etc. (The Dark One, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
 DM  12 RIZTAB (turn 515): TOM SMITH of THE LAWMEN (Marshal D, mgr.)
               (turn 514): DASTARDLY DAN of HIGH JINKS (Jondeaux, mgr.)
                           DREB 3 of THE LAWMEN (Marshal D, mgr.)
 DM  15 MALCORN (turn 508): STALKING HORSE of GREENWARDENS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  16 WILLAF (turn 510): O. PUN PLEEZJ of PUNNY AMINALS (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  17 ALJAFIR (turn 509): ACHILLES of HEROESANDFOUNDONES (The Judge, mgr.)
 DM  19 ZUWAYZA (turn 507): TMARACK of THE SIERRAS (Barnabas, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 254): CENTIPEDE of CLASSIC ARCADE (Street Legal, mgr.)
                          FOOLISH FOLGERS of IDIOTIC ICCERS (THawk, mgr.)
              (turn 253): BALDER of VALHALLA (KAT, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 251): REZOS THE THRACIAN of OVERLORDS (The Icelord, mgr.)
                               TRASHIUS of WHAMMO & THUDDA 4 U! (Micky, mgr.)
                               ABYSSINIAN of THE STORMBRINGERS (High Lord Bosk, mgr.)
 DM  32 ARVAT (turn 497): SAVORY of SARATOGA GLORY (The Trainer, mgr.)
                          TAD DEVILLE of DEVIL ADVOCATES (The Dark One, mgr.)
              (turn 496): BASKERVOLE of FISHERMAN'S WHARF (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  43 VEASTIAN (turn 449): TIRO CUCKOO of THE FAMILY (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 228): STORM SERPENT of SUPERIOR FORCES (Manager, mgr.)
 DM  61 JURINE (turn 355): TAIL IN THE AIR of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
               (turn 354): COOL CAT of ARENA FELINES (Garfield, mgr.)
                           SABA EL KEER of BLADE AND BLOOD (Noachian, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 158): ABASHI of BAATANAR'RITEZU (Asmo Dius, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Greetings, Warriors of SCOMSS SWAMP.  Allow this humble servant Novgorodny Vir 
to give you a respite from the fights in the form of this Spyreport.  The boys at 
MYSTIC ORC FEAST left the arena dejected, after being kicked out of the top spot by 
SECOND BANANAS.  Good show!  Like a chunk of francium heaved into a wet pond, 
SKELETON KEY blew up the rankings to 15!  Managers were muttering after FALLEN showed 
SCOMSS SWAMP what they could do:  3-2-1 to move up by 13.  Good things come to those 
who fight well, as ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ can attest, moving up by 9.  Practice pays for 
LADY ARCANE, who pummelled KOZYTA, to pocket 23 points.  A certain someone should cut 
down on the drinking and practice more, after losing 15 points to KRAMER.  (Discrete 
enough, ART PENDRAGON?) LEVIATHAN OF LARD successfully staved off a grab for the 
talented enough to dethrone him?  Word has it one team in SCOMSS SWAMP is using 
psychics to predict wins.  They lead a charmed life!   
     So much to report, so little time!  Like a horde of jackals fleeing from the 
lion, so did the "warriors" in SCOMSS SWAMP avoid SALEM'S LOT.  The warriors of 
SALEM'S LOT found their efforts at combat frustrated as GOTHIC MINISTRY apparently 
had more important things to do than fight.  Is it charming personality?  
Conversational abilities?  Good oral hygiene?  Whatever it is, HOLLE' CHERRY is the 
most challenged warrior.  Do my ears deceive me?  ERON RIPPER (outclassed by 30 
points) challenged WOODY, in what promises to be a fight.(!) It's not whether you win 
or lose, but how many points you get (1).  Right, ERON RIPPER?  WHITE SETTLER 
challenged HUMBUG!  Who says NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 are just a bunch of wimps!  WHITE 
SETTLER of NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 kept his wits as he beat HUMBUG.   
     Like the wind whispering among the pines, do hearest I many disquieting rumors.  
Hey GOTHIC MINISTRY!  Is there some deep dark, unmentionable secret as to why DARK 
WARLOCK has been sent to the Dark Arena?   4-1-0 isn't so shabby!  The manager at 
FEATHERS FLYIN' must have some new strategy for sending GAFF, a warrior with 5-2-0, 
to the Dark Arena.  Watch this space!  The audience gave a nice round of rasberries 
to KOZYTA of TREBORS, for expiring in such an ungraceful fashion.  9-13-2, indeed!  
Death in the arena!  In a cheap quest for a cheap victory, WOODY faced ERON RIPPER in 
an uneven fight.  FALLEN, we expect bloody revenge!  Never one to advocate diplomacy 
and restraint, I was pleased to see SKELETON KEY retaliate against FREEDONIA in 
bloodfeud!  Charity is unknown in SCOMSS SWAMP, and rightly so.  ADULT SWIM exacted 
their revenge against FEATHERS FLYIN'.  Justice was served as MARAJUANA MAN fought 
ANTON LEVAY in bloodfeud.  Well done, BLACK STORM!  Questions are being raised about 
the disposing of severed body parts in the arena.  A certain tavern in SCOMSS SWAMP 
would I avoid!   
     Do not think spyreporting in SCOMSS SWAMP is the highlight of my life.  As if 
buffeted by forces of nature beyond my control, I must take my leave of this place.  
Do not despair!  I shall return!-- Novgorodny Vir  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 OSLOBEN BENBOBEN 4561        16  13  1   114       SKELETON KEY (493)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-HOURGLASS 5127               17   2  0   118       LAND OF OZ (217)
-GREGOLA 5101                 21  13  0   111       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 MARAJUANA MAN 3411           12   4  2   105       BLACK STORM (171)
-ACE METRIC 3554               7   4  0    97       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 SPAWING OF SPEWN 5197        10   5  0    93       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 JABBERWOCK 1277              14  16  4    91       FREEDONIA (32)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 KRAMER 5191                   9   5  0    88       SECOND BANANAS (573)
-TOTO 3914                    17   9  0    86       LAND OF OZ (217)
-WYRD 5167                    10   4  0    79       DESOLATE ONES (524)
 FIGHTING TREE 5235            9   7  1    79       LAND OF OZ (217)
 AMELA BUNDERSON 5339          8   2  0    75       SKELETON KEY (493)
-RAVEN 3354                   10   8  0    74       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
 MINOR BLUE 5326               9   3  1    71       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 ART PENDRAGON 5151            8  11  0    69       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 SARA F. 5349                  7   2  0    69       SKELETON KEY (493)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BOMBADIL 2724                14  10  0    66       FREEDONIA (32)
 WHITE SETTLER 5322            6   5  1    62       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 LEPPADA 2257                 13  22  0    61       TREBORS (232)
 DEVOUT CHRISTIAN 5321         8   3  2    60       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 JENNA 5099                   13  10  3    58       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 SIR GALAHAD 5148             10   8  0    57       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LADY ARCANE 4381              5   2  1    56       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
 BODAK 5589                    4   2  1    53       CHAOTIX BEASTS (610)
 SWEET N LOW 5306              7   6  0    52       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 CLINTONLIKESBUSH 5318         7   4  0    52       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 BEAR NEKKID 5126             11   8  0    50       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 FREEZE DRIED 5308            10   3  0    49       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 AHURA MAZDA 5152              7   9  1    49       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 LITTLE BIG MAN 5393           5   1  1    48       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 HUMBUG 5199                  10   7  1    44       LAND OF OZ (217)
 JACK MCFARLAND 5481           4   1  0    43       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 SWAMP LILY HAMMER 5441        5   0  0    42       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 GANGSTA CREEP 5391            4   3  0    42       MAESTUS MORTALES (588)
 MAHARA 2656                   9  13  1    41       TREBORS (232)
 PAUL BEARER 5187              7   8  2    41       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 STEAL SHANK 5487              6   2  1    41       DARK PINNACLE (598)
 LEET STREEGLE 5368            5   2  0    41       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 ZOMBIE KNIGHT 3564           10   4  0    40       BLACK STORM (171)
-RASP 3353                     7  10  0    40       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
 B.B. CROSS 5323               8   4  2    36       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 WOODY 5412                    5   1  2    36       SECOND BANANAS (573)
-KELLANTH 3410                 9   6  0    35       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
 BLOOD RAYNE 5489              7   5  0    35       DARK PINNACLE (598)
 DASTER MARQUE 5196            6   9  0    35       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 ANTON LEVAY 5429              3   1  1    33       LEADERS (593)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CYANIDE 5444                  3   2  1    33       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
 SEALAB DEBBIE 5567            1   1  0    33       ADULT SWIM (589)
 APPIUS 5392                   5   2  0    32       MAESTUS MORTALES (588)
 DROPSHOT 5402                 3   0  1    32       FALLEN (590)
 DAINTY CHINA 5564             2   0  0    32       LAND OF OZ (217)
 CRISTER MOFFEE 5289           8   6  1    31       MANEGERIAL MAYHEM (574)
 INCUBUS 5423                  4   2  1    31       GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)
 SWAMP TRAP HAMMER 5442        4   1  1    31       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 CAFE AU LAIT 5344             4   7  0    31       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 BENDER 5395                   6   0  0    30       ADULT SWIM (589)
 WILSON 5482                   4   1  0    30       SECOND BANANAS (573)
-ARAUTHATOR 4660               3   1  0    29       DRACONIC REALM (519)
 HALLE BEARY 5312              3   8  0    27       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 MELON MUSH 5357               6   4  0    26       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
-JACK & JILL 5310              5   5  0    26       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
-TROUBLE 4151                  2   1  0    26       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
 CUP OF TOE 5433               2   0  0    26       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 RED DRAGON 5585               4   2  0    24       CHAOTIX BEASTS (610)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FRED BEAR 5348                4   5  0    23       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
-GET THE POINT? 5097           3   8  0    23       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 BEAR SKINRUG 5399             3   1  0    23       THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
 SWAMP BURP HAMMER 5439        3   2  1    22       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 VASH THE STAMPEDE 5396        3   3  0    22       ADULT SWIM (589)
-ZOMBIE ASSASSIN 5552          2   0  1    22       SALEM'S LOT (605)
 ICHORID 5584                  2   0  0    22       SALEM'S LOT (605)
-WAR CRY HAMM 5436             2   2  0    22       DESOLATE ONES (524)
 HITLER YOUTH 5547             1   2  0    21       NATURAL B. KILLERS 2 (584)
 BLACK BALL 5520               3   1  0    20       MAESTUS MORTALES (588)
 SWAMP CLAW HAMMER 5438        2   3  1    20       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 DAVID KARESH 5426             3   1  0    19       LEADERS (593)
 GENESIS 5435                  3   2  0    19       SOULFORGE (587)
 BONDS ON 'ROIDS 5408          2   0  0    19       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
 LOWELL 5569                   2   0  0    19       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 MR. CROWLEY 5570              2   0  0    19       LEADERS (593)
 EVICSERATOR 5358              5   3  0    18       BLACK STORM (171)
 BLACK THUNDER 3885            4   6  0    18       BLACK STORM (171)
-MIDGUARD 5410                 3   2  0    18       DESOLATE ONES (524)
 ETIENNE DUPLAIX 5377          2   5  1    18       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
 FINCH 5627                    1   0  0    18       FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
 EBOLA (Z) 5447                3   2  0    17       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
-DON KING 5374                 2   3  0    17       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
-JUSTICE FOR ALL 5534          2   0  0    17       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
-ARCHANGEL 5579                1   0  0    17       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (609)
 TSO TSUNG T'ANG 4391          4   2  0    16       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
-DRAMA QUEEN 5494              3   0  0    16       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 LIL BIT 5404                  2   1  1    16       FALLEN (590)
-VALAMARADACE 4695             2   2  0    16       DRACONIC REALM (519)
 AMALRIC 5378                  1   6  0    16       KNIGHTS TEMPLAR (568)
-DYERS EVE 5535                1   1  0    16       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
-SUZANNE 5560                  1   0  0    16       MAYFAIR (607)
 BRUTE 5590                    1   0  0    16       BLEAK LEGION (601)
 KENTSUI FURY 4382             4   3  0    15       THE RIPPER CREW (489)
 HANTA 5443                    2   3  0    15       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
-BEN HURT 4150                 2   1  0    14       ROYAL COMATENTS (301)
-ONE 5533                      2   0  0    14       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
-NIGHT TERROR 5420             1   3  0    14       THE DREAMING (591)
 DRACONIC 5595                 1   0  0    14       DRACONIC REALM (519)
-PRINCE DARIUS 5581            1   0  0    14       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (609)
-STELLA 5561                   1   0  0    14       MAYFAIR (607)
 FREMAN 5376                   2   5  0    13       FREEDONIA (32)
 DAMIEN BANESON 5519           1   0  0    13       BLEAK LEGION (601)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-BLACKENED 5531                2   0  0    12       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
-CRYPT ANGEL 5553              1   1  1    12       SALEM'S LOT (605)
 HUGH G. GO 5574               1   1  0    12       MISNOMERS (608)
 TRESSA 5388                   2   5  0    11       MAESTUS MORTALES (588)
 SHADE'S FORM 5549             2   1  0    11       SALEM'S LOT (605)
 CAPPUCCINO 5382               1   6  0    11       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 TARZAN 5542                   0   3  0    11       FREEDONIA (32)
-DEAD ANGLE 5418               2   2  1    10       THE DREAMING (591)
 ROBUST BREW 5400              2   4  0    10       COFFEE RULES! (505)
 AXELROD GUNNER 5401           2   2  0    10       FALLEN (590)
 LOW FAT LOON 5527             1   1  0    10       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
-CARLOTTA 5559                 1   0  0    10       MAYFAIR (607)
 ANGELIKA 5633                 1   0  0    10       FALLEN (590)
 BULLSEYE 5571                 1   1  0    10       SOULFORGE (587)
 SWAMP ROSE HAMMER 5440        0   5  0     9       ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
 SON YUNG MOON 5427            2   2  0     8       LEADERS (593)
 DIPTHERIA 5445                2   2  0     8       DOK SIK KILLAS (595)
 ICKY ICED FLEA 5565           1   1  0     8       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
-SHORTEST STRAW 5532           0   2  0     8       OF WOLF AND MAN (603)
-CLAUGIYLIAMATAR 4694          2   1  0     7       DRACONIC REALM (519)
 HOLLE' CHERRY 5437            2   1  0     7       SKELETON KEY (493)
 THE KURGEN 5636               1   0  1     7       FREEDONIA (32)
 OBLIVION 5518                 1   1  0     6       BLEAK LEGION (601)
-DAY DREAM 5417                1   3  0     6       THE DREAMING (591)
 DEMONIC HEX 5530              1   2  0     5       GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)
 HOMEY D. CLONE 5637           1   0  0     5       LIFE'S LESSONS (562)
-ASSAD 5580                    1   0  0     5       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (609)
 ETHER 5572                    1   1  0     4       SOULFORGE (587)
 SIR PRIZE 5576                1   1  0     4       MISNOMERS (608)
 TARGET 5573                   1   1  0     4       SOULFORGE (587)
 RICHARD CRANIUM 5577          1   1  0     4       MISNOMERS (608)
 CHARLES MANSON 5428           0   4  0     4       LEADERS (593)
 BALOR 5586                    0   4  0     4       CHAOTIX BEASTS (610)
-BROCK SAMPSON 5416            0   4  0     4       THE DREAMING (591)
 FEL STRIKE 5516               0   2  0     2       BLEAK LEGION (601)
 LADY SCALE 5517               0   2  0     2       BLEAK LEGION (601)
 MISS DE MEANOR 5575           0   2  0     2       MISNOMERS (608)
 MONICA HUMIDOR 5635           0   1  0     1       SKELETON KEY (493)
 NYCADAEMON 5592               0   1  0     1       GOTHIC MINISTRY (592)
-MUSTAFA 5568                  0   1  0     1       THE DREAMING (591)
-CHARLOTTE 5562                0   1  0     1       MAYFAIR (607)
 FETAL CREEPY 5634             0   1  0     1       SOULFORGE (587)
-ROWAN 5563                    0   1  0     1       MAYFAIR (607)
-ABDULLAH 5582                 0   1  0     1       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (609)
-MAXIMUS 5583                  0   1  0     1       CELESTIAL KNIGHTS (609)
 OUT TO KILL 5594              0   1  0     1       DARK PINNACLE (598)
 FREEBORN BLOODBLADE 5597      0   1  0     1       BLACK STORM (171)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
BROCK SAMPSON 5566     0  2 0 ADULT SWIM 589        ARENAMASTER OKEL 23   224 NONE    
FRYLOCKE 5541          1  2 0 ADULT SWIM 589        THE BARTENDER 26      224 NONE    
FAMILY GUY 5398        1  3 0 ADULT SWIM 589        B.B. CROSS 5323       222 JUST REV
CLOCKWORK ORANGE 5415  2  1 0 BLACK STORM 171       ANTON LEVAY 5429      222 JUST REV
WEAKNESS 5515          0  1 0 BLEAK LEGION 601      INCUBUS 5423          222         
CHIMERA 5588           2  3 0 CHAOTIX BEASTS 610    CARDIAC CRAIG 21      224 NONE    
DRIDER 5587            2  3 1 CHAOTIX BEASTS 610    MR. COFFEE 24         224 NONE    
LIAM 5485              0  2 0 DARK PINNACLE 598     BAPHOMET 22           224 NONE    
DAGGER DANGLER 5593    0  1 0 DARK PINNACLE 598     CARDIAC CRAIG 21      224 NONE    
GALDR 5171             7  6 1 DESOLATE ONES 524     FIGHTING TREE 5235    223         
ZYKLON 5548            1  1 0 DESOLATE ONES 524     ZOMBIE ASSASSIN 5552  223         
ANTHRAX 5446           2  3 1 DOK SIK KILLAS 595    DROPSHOT 5402         224         

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
KNIGHTMARE 5419        0  1 0 THE DREAMING 591      SWAMP CLAW HAMME 5438 220 REVENGED
ERON RIPPER 5403       0  4 0 FALLEN 590            WOODY 5412            224         
GAFF 5347              5  3 0 FEATHERS FLYIN' 585   PUTRID PATRICK 19     224 NONE    
GULL 5626              0  1 0 FEATHERS FLYIN' 585   THE KURGEN 5636       224         
MSK 5507               2  1 1 FEATHERS FLYIN' 585   WOODY 5412            223         
BRASSBACK 5544         0  2 0 FEATHERS FLYIN' 585   CRYPT ANGEL 5553      223         
NEUFCHATELLA 2958      3  9 0 FREEDONIA 32          STEAL SHANK 5487      223         
THE KURGEN 5375        1  3 0 FREEDONIA 32          SWAMP TRAP HAMME 5442 221         
LEE'S FODDER 5591      0  1 0 GOTHIC MINISTRY 592   DARRELL DEATH 25      224 NONE    
JIM JONES 5430         1  1 0 LEADERS 593           DEAD ANGLE 5418       222         
BEWARE OF CLONES 5409  0  1 0 LIFE'S LESSONS 562    CYANIDE 5444          220 REVENGED
PICUS 5390             1  5 0 MAESTUS MORTALES 588  PUTRID PATRICK 19     224 NONE    
MORE SCRAP 5598        0  1 0 MISNOMERS 608         PUTRID PATRICK 19     224 NONE    
BADI AL ZAMAN 4384     2  5 0 THE RIPPER CREW 489   GUILLOTINE GARTH 20   224 NONE    
FAJR FALAK 4380        2  5 0 THE RIPPER CREW 489   MURDEROUS MARK 18     224 NONE    
CARRION WURM 5550      0  3 0 SALEM'S LOT 605       WURM KIN 27           224 NONE    
SKIPPY 5411            1  2 0 SECOND BANANAS 573    MSK 5507              221 REVENGED
PAULA BONES 4414      18 14 1 SKELETON KEY 493      JABBERWOCK 1277       223 JUST REV
IMMAZAEL 5384          2  4 1 SOULFORGE 587         LIL BIT 5404          223         
GRAY GHOST 5387        2  3 1 SOULFORGE 587         DEVOUT CHRISTIAN 5321 222         
SHADOW 5434            1  2 0 SOULFORGE 587         SWAMP BURP HAMME 5439 222         
KOZYTA 2640            9 13 2 TREBORS 232           LADY ARCANE 4381      224         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Waspy -- Hey rookie, I have only been playing for 17 months myself.  Oh and I got
that kill on my challenge this time didn't I?  P has been playing for about 12 months
now.  Nemesis has been in about the same as P.  Stop throwing your newbieness around;
it doesn't matter.  You can't hang on the sands and you can't hang in the spotlights.
I am making you my personal project.  I know, I know, you're trembling right?  If you
aren't scared, you're stupid.  kLk kLk BOOM! -- Azraelus Prime
P.S.  Why you guys want us to kiss you so bad?  I know I am fine but I don't kiss
guys.  Sorry.

Waspy -- Nice list of dead warriors, mate.  Glad I don't fight for you. -- Azraelus

Waspy -- BTW, that challange that Eron lost to you; I had to find out what Immazael
was before I could kill it. -- Azraelus Prime

Galdr of Jesuits -- It was not my intention to kill anyone.  I am sorry.  Mea culpa.
Good luck in That Great Arena In The Sky. -- Fighting Tree

Wow!  Look at all those Initiates.  This Turf War Revival is going to be FUN! -- Oz
The All Excited

Woody/Mannequin -- Looks like something MUST have been learned in the tournament.
(wink)  Now THAT was ferocious.  Poor MSK. -- Oz The All Knowing

SCOMS Tower -- Was this already TWIV?  Am I missing something?  Duelmaster.
Chartered Recog Leader.  Current Top Team.  Top 3 of 4 Teams On The Move.  Top 4 of 5
Last Three Turn Win-Loss Record.  Are we premature, or are we merely building steam?!
A Salute to The Fellowship. -- Oz The All Puzzled

Lardy, Lardy, Leviathon is again on top!  Grand Duelmaster!  And now Lord Protector.
Well done, Captain Slugbait. -- Oz The All Jealous

Father O'Malley -- Bless me Father for I have sinned.  My last confession was too
long ago.  I committed a mortal sin by calling you Soultaker, Father.  I am sorry.  I
should know better.  For my penance, I am asking you to have all the Sisters spank
me. -- Oz The All Penitent

Mannequin The Cute and Adorable -- It is great to see you so active in the personals
and so "rip their hearts out when they least expect it" in the bloodfeuds.  You are
THE MAN. -- Oz The All Awed

Hammer -- What is this "plotting challenges and avoids" thing? -- Oz The All
Unassuming (trying to pull the nonchalant act)

Father O'Malley -- Supplicate?  They sure did teach you linguistics at that
Monastery, didn't they?  I supplicate myself before your greater intelligence. -- Oz
The All Humbled

Mr. Ice Pick -- Neither our stable, nor any of The Consortium stables, have ever been
upset with The Hammer.  We do admit to occasionally falling asleep during some of the
regularly long sermons, however. -- Oz The All Rested

Lasher Of Mayfair -- Welcome to The SCOMSS Swamp.  And welcome to the TW Competition.
I am sure the arena will be enhanced by your presence. -- Oz The Welcome Wagon

Wasby The Great -- It was always my belief that there was no malice intended.  Good
luck in your Turf War efforts. -- Oz The All Knowing

Dark Knight Stoker -- We judge everyone individually, and your slate with us has
remained clean.  Good luck in your Turf War efforts. -- Oz The All Empathetic

Little Big Man -- I don't know how I did that, but I don't want you to think it is
because I discriminate against little people.  (Except The Sentinel, of course.) --
Humbug, not feeling at all "bah"

Dark Knight Goat -- Well, thank you for sincerely for that very kind personal. -- Oz
The All Appreciative

Blackstorm -- Another Oz in Arkers?  I hope not!  The Usurper!  Oh, you are probably
speaking about The Smithsonians and my brother Curator, (He knows much more about hot
air balloons than I do!) who is also a Consortium Fellow.  They both, team and
manager, have retired, but he sends his regards and good luck for the TWIV. -- Oz The
All Helpful

Baphomet -- Watch out for the Winning Bucket Brigade, you say?  Then you should have
stolen it! -- Oz The All Helpful

Loquacious Abraxis -- You are soporific! -- Oz The All Humorous

Brock Sampson -- Overpowered by a chintzy piece of pottery?!  That should accentuate
your humility. -- Dainty China

Slugbait, Crip, Mannequin, Father O'Malley -- The Ozers are really, really looking
forward to the TWIV.  We are humbled to be allowed in a Fellowship with managers of
such great character. -- Oz The All Humble

Hammer -- I think I remember Rose Hammer.  That was a brutal fight.  But then your
fighters always bring out the killer in mine.  As for these clowns, I don't like
clowns all that much either.  There is something wrong with all that jolliness.
We'll try to make some of these clowns cry. -- Noachian, Servant of Kjarran

Talon Darkhart -- As you said, anyone a friend of Hammer's is a friend of mine.  I
accept your invite to join the ILLUMINATI team.  May Kjarran guide our blades! --
Noachian, mgr. The Ripper Crew

Father O' Malley -- My Lord Kjarran, is The One True God, The God Of All.  All other
gods are false!  We will not supplicate ourselves to your false god.  We do, however,
intend to sacrifice some of your sisters to my Lord Kjarran, so that He can feast on
their flesh and drink their blood.  You can save yourself from this fate if you
accept Kjarran as you master and as your One God. -- Noachian, Servant of Kjaran,
mgr. The Ripper Crew

Baphomet and Turf War swampers -- This is Street Legal declaring my team, LIFE'S
LESSONS, for the upcoming Turf War.  The RU cert should be on the way shortly, if not
by now.  I am going to declare my champion as HOMEY D CLONE.  Good luck to all and
glory to Vendetta Cartel, let's kick names and take ass, boys! -- Street Legal, mgr.
of Life's Lessons

Bapohmet -- I declare under the banner of the Iron Council and my team will be
Wolfcats. -- Ultraist

Baphomet/All -- I am announcing entry into the Turf War.  Team name is Indifference
and I will be representing The Iron Council. -- Jekyll

Bullseye -- Wow, you'd think I found my favorite weapon, wouldn't you? -- Lowell

Etienne Duplaix -- Your weapons of choice work well--if you were fighting in a phone
booth. -- Wilson

Dead Angle -- Your team has declared you their champion?  Ooooooooooooooooohh, we
looooooovvvee that decision!! -- Jack McFarland

MSK -- It looks like there was a lot more than feathers flying around at the
conclusion of our bloodfeud, namely your head!  I await your team's bloodfeud, though
I hope they will forgive me if I choose to avoid them once the Turf War begins. --

Sting -- "Fly like a butterfly, sting like a bee, look like a Golem who happens to be
an AB!" -- Kramer

Baphomet -- No apology necessary.  You have a tough job and I appreciate the time and
effort it takes for you do it well. -- Mannequin

Baphomet -- We have decided that Wilson will be our champion. -- Mannequin, mgr. of
Second Bananas

Oz the All Conservative -- Even the giant Redwood bends to the strength and power of
the wind, and we all know the prevailing wind is coming from the RIGHT.  It won't be
long before Mother Nature takes steps to return things to the way she LEFT them. --
Mannequin, who refuses to say he goes both ways lest he give people the wrong

*Baphomet* -- That was supposed to be declared last cycle as SWAMP LILY HAMMER being
declared as Champion for ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ stable! -- Hammer the Illuminati Ice Pick
of Incorrect Champion Declarations

Baphomet -- This is the announcement for the Vendetta Cartel Turf War IV Squad;
Participating will be four talented and skilled managers:  (Master Darque, Team:
Darque Forces, Champion:  Orc Plague) -- (Street Legal, Team:  Life's Lessons, Champ:
Homey D. Clone) -- (Maximillian, Team:  Natural B. Killers, Champ:  Undecided) --
(Kat, Team:  The Bear's Paw:  Champ:  Paul Bearer);  Come one and all.  If anything
like the last two, it should prove to be entertaining. -- The Abyssinian of
Announcement, Kat

Baphomet -- Have you received my second cert yet?  I have not received any response
from you.  You did get my last letter right?  Let me know. -- D.K. Toker

Baphomet -- Would you please remove my team Vincere Aut Mori from the vendett@UNITED
Alliance list.  I re-declare for the "Desolate Empire."  If Abraxis re-declares he
will captain for TW4.  If not, by request of my alliance mates, I will captain.  As
of now I verify:  Wasby, Goat, Abraxis, CFH, Dok Sik, Skullagrim, Heathen, Lasher,
Wiefgraff and Sho-time.  If there is anyone I have forgotten, declare by T-225 and
that is all they need. -- Dark Knight Toker, "Desolate Empire"

Abraxis -- You should have received my diplo via another arena already.  So you
should now what's going on.  With CFH saying he's going to be here for TW4 on T-225,
and your statement to the contrary, all of us (Goat, Wasby and I) consider you a
friend, and if you choose, you have captaincy for the TW4 still.  Just under a new
name.  I hope our diplos help clarify our feelings and that you understand. -- your
brother in arms, Dark Knight Toker, "Desolate Empire"

CFH -- This is not what you think.  We have tried to get you and Abraxis to agree
upon a name change, to no avail.  That is all this is to us, a NAME change.  Nothing
is changing from what our alliance was, just the name and an agreement of better
communication.  I implore you both to come and be leaders to the betterment of our
Alliance's knowledge and skill.  If not, I wish you both the best and know you will
be welcome at anytime. -- Dark Knight Toker

Dark Knight Goat -- And so it starts...let's prove our might with our warriors'
swords.  I tire of bandying words with the mentally challenged.  A spot here and
there and a funny or non-slighting p-ad is all I will write for a while.  Let our
enemies' words hang themselves.  Once it goes too far, then and only then will I 
erupt. -- Dark Knight Toker
P.S.  Your condolences are appreciated!  Thanks.

Dark Knight Wasby -- Let's start with a bang on T-225.  Show our mettle and enjoy the
competition. -- Dark Knight Toker

Sir Galahad -- The downchallenge is noted.  I will return the favor in kind upon your
team when the opportunity arises. -- Gangsta Creep and V.A.U. (588)

Swamp Lily Hammer -- Alas another Illuminati and yet another downchallenge byover 20
pts.  Not surprising!  At least you did pick my weakest warrior.  Now he goes to
fight at night. -- Dark Knight Toker, "Desolate Empire"

Heathen -- Goat has asked me to verify you, in case you choose to join us.  Instead
of that other (a-hem) manager.  You will be welcomed with open arms, if you so
choose. -- Dark Knight Toker

T.D.H. -- Thanks for your kind words.  I just answered your and Hammer's emails
tonight.  Keep your blade sharp for the contest.  You will need all the help you can
get. -- D.K. Toker

Baphomet -- You have Misnomers as un-verified.  As team capt I verify Misnomers,
Black Thunder and ANY other team that declares for my alliance.  Consider this an
"open" verification. -- Mr. Coffee

Baphomet -- I declare Freeze Dried my champion. -- Mr. Coffee

Baphomet -- I declared an "open" acceptance in the newsletter last turn.  Does that
mean I can have Black Thunder on my team for scoring purposes?

Hammer -- Take your time, no rush.  I understand when people are busy. -- Mr. Coffee
P.S.  Could I borrow your "icepick" self to chip some ice at my next party?  HaHaHa!

Oz, Crip, Slugbait, Mannequin, Soultaker -- (Hope I didn't miss anyone.)  Good luck
in the contest. -- Mr. Coffee

A BIG WELCOME -- to all you new managers to the swamp. -- Mr. Coffee

Baphomet/All -- I am officially taking myself out of the Illuminati Alliance, per the
rules, before the contest officially starts. -- Tripwire

Baphomet/All -- I am announcing a new alliances entering the Turf War.  The alliance
is called The Iron Council.  Since I am familiar with the Turf War Rules, I will be
the captain of the alliance for this contest.  Per the rules I am officially
verifying that the following managers are in The Iron Council:  1) Tripwire, Team:
Of Wolf and Man  2) Jekyll, Team:  Indifference  3) and Ultraist, Team:  Wolfcats.
These team members will also be announcing their intent to participate with The Iron
Council in the Personal Ads. -- Tripwire

Baphomet -- Hopefully when you read this you will be looking at the entrance
certificates for each of The Iron Council.  On 4/28 I asked RSI to send in three
rollup certs to you for each of The Iron Council members.  The receipt of the email
was acknowledged, but if you do not have them when you receive this turn, please let
me know either through email or RSI that they have not been received so I can hand
mail them to you myself. -- Tripwire

All -- I am officially announcing my team Of Wolf and Man as in the Turf War under
The Iron Council. -- Tripwire

Baphomet -- Greetings!  I am officially declaring for Illuminati.  Yes, witness the
return of Baatanar'ritezu!  My champ will be...Pazuzu, the demon prince himself.
(evil grin) -- Asmo Dius, returned to DM 47 to TCB

Azrael -- You wanna be a Batman clone, do you want to try out my sword?  (wink, wink)
-- Lord Abraxis

Hammy -- Bring it on, hide behind whoever (excuse my verbage, whomever) you want.  I
personally will stultify you all.  I am not a newbie!  Have you ever graduated a
warrior in only 18 fights?  I have!  So klk on this, Hamboy!  As my will, so mote it
be! -- Abraxis

Slugbait -- We have crossed swords before, neither as allies or foes, just as
competitors.  I wish you and your alliance the best, even though I will try to beat
you!  As my will, so mote it be! -- Abraxis

Hammy -- Moron, only one of us resides in Walker County and you headhunters fear him!
As my will, so mote it be! -- Abraxis

Baphomet -- I confirm Skullagrim, Lasher and Wiefgraph for v@U! -- Lord Abraxis

Goat -- It's Son Yung Moon, I have no interest in some Young Man!

All -- I write this only as clarification.  V@U is a group of peers, not a
master/slave relationship.  We are accountable to each other, all of us!  No one is
our leader.  Once you're in, you're my peer!  As my will, so mote it be! -- Abraxis

Assurnasirbanipal -- Welcome, my long named friend.  Didn't think you would make it,
but good to know that the bash man is here. -- Buddy Lee

Tripwire -- (pointing)  Mr. Coffee got lots of gum. -- Buddy Lee

Baphomet -- Did you and Sir Chester get your teams mixed up? -- Buddy Lee

Celestial Knights -- Oh sure!  That's just fine, a holy knight.  I'm not even a real
demon. -- Demonix Hex

Azrael -- Hello to you and the Fallen. -- Liam

P-Diddy -- Where's Mace?  Nice to meet you. -- Liam

Tripwire -- Big fan of your work. -- Liam

Nemesis -- Hi. -- Liam

Buddy Lee -- Look!  It's Oz drinking tea. -- Liam

Noachian -- Maybe we can get a bite to eat one of these nights. -- Liam

Cool beans, Coffee!  I do declare, Nemesis will join TATIOAHC, and The Kurgen will
champion.  Victory will be ours (but what will we name our conquest, "TATIOADH
Township?")! -- Snarkfest (usually Switzerland)

Swamp Trap Hammer -- Twice Grendel fell for you!  Shame.... (...revenge...)

(Oh, oh!  I see, the "name-change-o-rama" was the Commission's April fool!  Ok, ok,
you got me good!  Ha ha ha. -- O'Snarky

Paula!  Miss Bones!!  Tea buddy!!!  I was only "playing a romp" with you--a little
fun!  But I was a bull, and you were delicate in that china plate you always wore for
me--and now I've broken you forevermore...Paula my pet!  Why do you do it?  WHY DID
YOU CHALLENGE ME!? -- Jabberwock

(Whoa, never seen Jabber like this.  He blames himself.  I coached him a "3" kill
desire that fight...women! -- Snark)

Jack and Jill -- Titania (RIP) was a lunger-magnent too... -- Snark (2, 4, 6, 8!  You
don't wanna integrate!)

Hourglass -- You stole my "GANDHI award" for sitting out last round. -- Sting (who
two beat you?)

Orc Feast -- You look good!  You lost some weight!  I gotta try that "AD
liposuction"! -- just SNARKING around

"Go!  Bananas!  Go!  Go!  Bananas!" -- all the apes at Nemesis (wait up!)

Lasher, Buddy Lee and Sho-time -- Train not "determined but sickly" recruits, or
swamp-lungers will kill your five warriors in four turns. -- Snarkmentoring
(condolences, Soul Forge)

Black -- Storm's a brewin'! with Coffee, c'mon! -- Snark

Me Tarzan sic FBI on David Karesh!

Vincere Aut Mori -- Flail Caesar!  I took Casiea, and now this swamp. -- The Kurgen

Titania -- I was in dodging mode that was definitely spell binding.  Jabber Wok, I
guess you would have to do the honorable thing and feud, but can I have one request--
get the throne first; just in case I win, I'll get to be the Duelmaster. --
Stealshank the all wishing
P.S.  If you can dodge a bus, you can dodge a sword.

Gangsta Creep, White Steller, Warfarin -- Of all the other possible tourney match
"we" had to get matched up.  I wasn't even going to attack, but you all attacked me
like crazy mad men on berserker fury.  Simmer down now. -- Steal Shank

Goat and VU -- Thank you for not addressing Illuminati as a whole.  Some of us are
just bystanders caught in the mix.  I'm not here for personal vendettas but to enjoy
my first contest.  Let your guys know they are no longer off limits if they challenge
me. -- Buddy Lee

Mannequin -- Damn that honest Jiles, but thanks for the tip.  I mean stab...no...tip
yes that's it. -- Buddy Lee must be the garlic liquor

Lasher, Wiefgraf -- Welcome to the swamp fest.  Feel free to make yourself
comfortable.  Take a tour and meet everybody but careful, some of these guys will
kick your face in. -- Buddy Lee

SCOMS Tower -- Even though Spawn is gone I still think you should still fly his "S"
just for out of respect.  What if he wants to come back?  He won't have a place. --
Buddy Lee

Baphomet -- I redeclare my team--Soulforge--for the Desolate Empire.  I WILL NOT
declare a champion for the contest. -- Wasby the Great

Vendetta Cartel -- You all know how I feel.  I never had nor do I have any hard
feelings or malice towards ANY managers. -- Wasby

Illuminati -- NO more words.  Let's get down to business. -- Dark Knight Wasby the
Great, Desolate Empire

Pharaoh -- My brother in fate, good of you to come to the swamp.  Nice first turn
bro, you should write Baphomet for lessons etc....  Due to the war in real life, will
be hard to see you, but will help as I can.  With that, good luck and may Ahringol be
with you. -- Liam the Goth, Ghoul Lord
P.S.  Drink some blood; you look a little pale.  ;)

Salem's Lot -- Hey Willow, good to see you outside of the gardens of the Damned.  May
Ahringol guide you, lol. -- Liam the Goth, your favorite vampire
P.S.  The swamp is a nice place for hunting the living.

Bleak Legion -- A lost soul that walks the winds of dusk, I wait for the feud if you
wish. -- Liam the Goth

Hammer -- Thank you for the welcome. I will enjoy myself.  We keep meeting on the
sand.  Nice to see Noachian here.  So who was the vampire you were talking to in the
underground catacombs deep beneath the Jhans Arena hum?  Yeah, been in Jhans looking
around the place; Sir Chester said he would use his toothbrush on me if I didn't send
a team so I have.  See you there off and on. -- Liam the Goth

Sir Chester -- Received your letter, three pages, you brute.  Will be sending you
another.  Nice info, thanks. -- Liam the Goth

Bookie -- Received your diplo.  Thank you.  Will write to you. -- Liam the Goth

Baphomet -- Chainmail and daggers, oops.  Shows you where my mind is, as I forgot my
sword "life bane" in Morya.  I did bring a small band of undead with me, there with
Vel'lisui the swamp lich.  Do give Pharaoh a helping hand as I misplaced mine
'again.' -- Liam the Goth

Claw Hammer -- Well that was fun.  Keep that chin up. -- Blood Rayne

EBola (2) -- Nice challenge.  Love your style.  Good luck.  I go to the D.A. --
Warlock the Damned

Crip -- So we meet again. -- Liam the Goth

Hammo -- Got lost, waiting for your answers. -- The Expatriate

TCB -- The Winds of War are upon us.  Will you join me in destroying the enemies in
V@U? -- Baphomet, TCB, Illuminati War Beast

Hammer -- Truly an oversight.  It has been corrected.  And my prayers remain
constantly for you and yours. -- Baphomet

TDH -- Sorry.  How stupid of me! -- Baphomet (abashed)

Wasby -- Those rookies in klk and TCB?  They ain't really rookies!  Sometime, I'll
tell you about it.  Until then...you might want to gather intelligence before opening
up and sounding like a fool. -- Baphomet

Noachian -- I welcome you to Illuminati.  If there's anything I can do, just holler!
-- Baphomet

Assur -- Your reputation has preceded you.  Welcome! -- Baphomet

Buddy Lee -- Dragon Hunting was too dangerous.  I'm hunting wooly goats now. --
P.S.  Wanna join me?  Post the challenges.

Liam -- Fried Lizard?  Dude...leave the stuff alone!  We're supposed to be cutting
out Goat's liver!  Fry it, boil it, saute it, fricassee it, bake it...whatever, but
cut it out! -- Baphomet

Heathen -- Saw the inference with your DA.  Be nice.... -- Baphomet

Mr. Coffee -- I haven't forgotten former alliances.  Just returning a favour you paid
me. -- Baphomet (grinning)

Crip -- Surprised you even still knew how to talk, it's been so long. -- Baphomet

Lasher -- Another Anne Rice fan, eh? -- Baphomet (who's read all her work up to date)

Abraxis -- Dude, I'll list you as Captain, but if CFH comes back and says it's
bogus...your team will also lose your verifications as well. -- Baphomet (making a
decision regarding the contest)

All -- Have you all noticed that the VC contingent hasn't said much here lately? --

Mannequin -- Who said you were cute?  Wasn't *ME!* -- Baphomet
P.S.  Although you've been beating up on the Knights a lot lately.  Seems now that I
know your strategy...I'll be rectifying things real soon.

Baphomet -- I am redeclaring my warriors to fight under the Desolate Empire banner.
My warriors are the Dok Sik Killas.  My champion is going to be Manta. -- Dok Sik

Baphomet (the Host) -- Please take me off the V@U roster.  The Jesuits will be
fighting for The Desolate Empire Alliance. -- Dark Knight Goat

Hammer -- Don't you get tired of writing the same old drivel?  I'm sure everyone is
up to date on our feud.  I have really enjoyed butting you around.  But...what are we
really gaining from all this?  Don't get me wrong, Hammer, I will always be at war
with you, my ego can only put out so much.  So, while we war, let us learn about
hmmm...how does Hammer design a Lunger?  Will you create one with a will of 15?  I
won't.  Do you have a minimum size?  3-9 for my long term Lunger.  What is your
favorite style?  Mine are P-Strikers.  So, you see while we feud we can try to
improve the game.  I am up to slinging crap around and asking questions. -- Dark
Knight Goat
P.S.  This is not a truce from me!  But a constructive idea.

Lasher -- You are needed every turn, my brother in arms. -- Dark Knight Goat

Fighting Tree -- Did not even see it coming!  You will get no bloodfeud from my
stablemates. -- Ghost of Galor

All -- Galor -- AB -- RH -- 11-11-10-13-9-9-21, did Good Dmg, +1 to Attack, learned 2
Ini, 4 Rip, 7 Att, 3 Par, 2 Def, 3 Dec in twelve fights.  I ran this AB 10-10-1 Dodge
against offensive.  Beat one Lunger and Basher.  When fighting TPs I ran a 9-3-5 no
tactic.  She threw crits with the SS. -- Dark Knight Goat

Zombie Assassin -- Real nice.  Don't mind losing to one of your kind. -- Ghost of

Azrael -- Everyone knows clowns don't back up.  They just squirt you in your eye.
(handing you a rag) -- Dark Knight Goat

Big Bad Voo Doo Daddy -- My funds are getting low.  I do not, will not, bring anyone
to Jhans but myself.  Waiting on a rollup.  So "White Zombie" couldn't have said it
better, "get down on it."  (Thunder Kiss 65) -- Dark Knight Goat

The Desolate Empire -- Arise and be counted... -- Dark Knight Goat

Mr. Coffee -- Well, old friend, it appears as though it will be you and I for the
duration huh?  Actually it isn't as daunting as some may think--Turf War aficionados
will recall that Fizban and I nearly toppled another of Crip's oppressive governments
in Erinika during the Truf War II, so with your superior leadership I'm sure we can
accomplish where the Fanatci one failed.  Snail mail can only be received via en 
route.  I think I've upset the RUGs, but I'll try to put this band of misfit names
together before losing us too many points!  Hail the Gods!! -- Heathen

Blackstorm -- If it's honorable you seek, there are none more so than Mr. Coffee!  As
for myself...well, I try.  Join us for the Turf War and judge for yourself. --
Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Misnomers

Goat -- Sieg Heil, Bruder!  Received your diplo--will reply with this turn.  I
believe I have some Moses there in Illis and some Chosen Ones in Fratsfa, so let me
check the war chest and I may join either or both in the near future, ok?  'Til then
let's have some fun in this here Turf War! -- Heathen Hatebred

Everybody with your ICP and Slim Shady references -- They are playground lyricists
next to HAYSTAK!  "If you kick my butt we're gonna do it again, every time that you
see me 'til I finally win, and the, I'm kickin' your butt until I'm content, you're
gonna be walking around for months wearing my fingerprints." -- Heathen

Toker and Wasby -- Hailsa! -- Heathen

CFH and Abraxis -- To you as well of course. -- Heathen

Oz -- It's been a while, but I served under the Deities of Chaos banner in the first
Turf War as Immortal Myth and since as...Heathen Hatebred, Fascist Federation.
P.S.  Good luck in the Turf War!

Abdullah -- All that armor will slow you down--not to mention you should have only
used the Hatchet!  Not that I EVER expect to lose, with my... -- Hugh G. Go

Assad -- Well fought!  I don't mind a little give and take now and then!! -- Miss De

Who let's these "Convicted Thieves" on to the arena sands?  I would like to lodge a
formal complaint--they shouldn't even have hands if they're known to steal! -- Sin
Prize, the annoyed

Ether -- That should NOT have happened! -- Richard Cranium

Baphomet -- With the death of your moniker is the dawning of a new day. -- Heathen

Chester -- Is that you?  Hey, hey!  Pay attention!!  There will be no smashing of ANY
coffee as long as I am around!! -- Heathen Hatebred
P.S.  Good to see you though.

Father O'Malley -- We will NOT have you imposing your theocratic, peace, love, hug a
tree, turn the other cheek, kneeling ways in this arena!  Neither I, nor any of mine
"supplicate" themselves before any god, let alone a mere mortal, though we will bless
your sisters with something!!  Victory or Valhalla!! -- Heathen

Skullagrim -- Oh hey, didn't see you there!  Hailsa!! -- Heathen

"Brave and noble men who think that are the farthest removed from "mortality" which
sees the mark of the moral precisely in pity or in acting for others; belief in
oneself, pride in oneself, a fundamental hostility and irony for "selflessness"
belong just as definitely to noble morality as does a mild contempt for and caution
against sympathy and the "warm heart"--it is the powerful who UNDERSTAND how to
honor, that is their art, their realm of invention." -- Friedrich Nietzsche

All -- Take heed and good luck! -- Heathen
P.S.  Is nobody naming a champion or what?  Come on!

Baphomet -- I don't care what it's called.  V@U or Desolate Empire.  I declare and I
will be Captain. -- As my will, so mote it be. -- Abraxis

Goat, Wasby, Toker -- Let's win this thing! -- Abraxis

20 April 2005
I have returned after a five-year absence.  I expect all tithes, gifts and bequeaths
to resume as normal. -- Magic Man

4 May 2005
Several questions have been asked about Slaughter's Challenge that I'd like to
address and clarify.
     1)  All Prizes must be used on the contest team, this includes the resurrection.
         Remember any fast arena team should be able to transfer to a slow arena
         (except for arena 82, I believe).
     2)  Warriors will be allowed to fight and run in the dead tourney, should there
         be one, and return if an opening can be made without breaking the rules
         (i.e. only one DA fight allowed per team).
     3)  If you win your single DA match you do not get another.  It's one use of the
         Dark Arena win or lose so if you want him/her/it dead be sure and throw the
     4)  The resurrection potion's longevity has been extended by the commission to 6
         months but the other potions (favorites, and +1 bonus) must still be used
         within 2 turns and on a 5 FE or higher warrior.  The resurrection can go on
         any warrior regardless of FE.
Street Legal

P.S.  My thanks to those already entered (Hammer, The Consortium, Tripwire, Stik, and
Shaman) and hope many more find a reason to come to arena 54.  Again, my email is
triumph1971@hotmail.com or you can diplo me in arena 14 at THE DEATH SQUAD (63) if
you need more info!

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DARK WARLOCK was butchered by GUILLOTINE GARTH in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
GAFF was dispatched by PUTRID PATRICK in a 1 minute Dark Arena battle.
BADI AL ZAMAN was easily killed by GUILLOTINE GARTH in a 1 minute Dark Arena match.
FAJR FALAK was slaughtered by MURDEROUS MARK in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena brawl.
PICUS was slain by PUTRID PATRICK in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
LIAM was murdered by BAPHOMET in a 1 minute Dark Arena competition.
CARRION WURM was butchered by WURM KIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
BROCK SAMPSON was assassinated by ARENAMASTER OKEL in a 1 minute Dark Arena struggle.
CHIMERA was easily killed by CARDIAC CRAIG in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
DRIDER was easily killed by MR. COFFEE in a 1 minute gruesome Dark Arena melee.
FRYLOCKE was dispatched by THE BARTENDER in a 3 minute Dark Arena duel.
MORE SCRAP was slain by PUTRID PATRICK in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
DAGGER DANGLER was slaughtered by CARDIAC CRAIG in a 1 minute Dark Arena fight.
LEE'S FODDER was assassinated by DARRELL DEATH in a 2 minute Dark Arena match.
OSLOBEN BENBOBEN overpowered JABBERWOCK in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud Title fight.
MARAJUANA MAN demolished ANTON LEVAY in a 1 minute mismatched Bloodfeud competition.
JENNA was devastated by CYANIDE in a 1 minute one-sided Bloodfeud battle.
FREMAN was viciously subdued by STEAL SHANK in a 2 minute bloody Bloodfeud bout.
FEL STRIKE was handily defeated by INCUBUS in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud fight.
SEALAB DEBBIE luckily beat B.B. CROSS in a 1 minute Bloodfeud struggle.
TARZAN was bested by SWAMP TRAP HAMMER in a crowd pleasing 4 minute Bloodfeud brawl.
KRAMER overpowered ART PENDRAGON in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
SIR GALAHAD was savagely defeated by SARA F. in a 3 minute gory Challenge match.
ZOMBIE KNIGHT was outwaited by BOMBADIL in a 18 minute Challenge competition.
BEAR NEKKID beat MAHARA in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
SWEET N LOW vanquished DASTER MARQUE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
WHITE SETTLER handily defeated HUMBUG in a 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
FREEZE DRIED luckily beat GANGSTA CREEP in a popular 4 minute gory Challenge match.
BLOOD RAYNE won victory over HALLE BEARY in a 2 minute Challenge match.
JACK MCFARLAND overpowered VASH THE STAMPEDE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
HITLER YOUTH was vanquished by SWAMP LILY HAMMER in a 2 minute uneven Challenge bout.
APPIUS handily defeated ETIENNE DUPLAIX in a 1 minute uneven Challenge bout.
SWAMP BURP HAMMER narrowly defeated HANTA in a 4 minute Challenge competition.
AMALRIC savagely defeated TARGET in a 2 minute gruesome Challenge fight.
SWAMP CLAW HAMMER overcame BLACK THUNDER in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
EVICSERATOR was overpowered by LEET STREEGLE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
TSO TSUNG T'ANG defeated TRESSA in a 3 minute Challenge bout.
DEMONIC HEX was overpowered by GENESIS in a 3 minute uneven Challenge bout.
ANTHRAX was killed by DROPSHOT in a 1 minute Challenge contest.
SHADE'S FORM won victory over CHARLES MANSON in a 1 minute amateur's Challenge fight.
HUGH G. GO was subdued by BENDER in a 2 minute Challenge struggle.
LADY SCALE was overpowered by MR. CROWLEY in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fray.
ERON RIPPER was murdered by WOODY in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
OBLIVION was subdued by EBOLA (Z) in a 4 minute novice's Challenge duel.
BLACK BALL luckily beat LIL BIT in a 3 minute gory Challenge duel.
BONDS ON 'ROIDS overcame HOLLE' CHERRY in a 6 minute amateur's Challenge match.
ICHORID overpowered DIPTHERIA in a 1 minute uneven Challenge battle.
DAVID KARESH vanquished SWAMP ROSE HAMMER in a 3 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
LEVIATHAN OF LARD won victory over SPAWING OF SPEWN in a 1 minute conflict.
FIGHTING TREE was defeated by KHALHUMS DWARF in a 2 minute bloody veteran's brawl.
AMELA BUNDERSON handily defeated LEPPADA in a 1 minute one-sided conflict.
MINOR BLUE savagely defeated CLINTONLIKESBUSH in a exciting 2 minute gory fight.
CRISTER MOFFEE was vanquished by LITTLE BIG MAN in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
KOZYTA was easily killed by LADY ARCANE in a 1 minute gruesome mismatched bout.
DEVOUT CHRISTIAN demolished CAPTURED ORC in a 1 minute mismatched match.
AHURA MAZDA savagely defeated RED DRAGON in a exciting 6 minute gory battle.
PAUL BEARER was overpowered by BODAK in a 1 minute mismatched conflict.
KENTSUI FURY was handily defeated by DAINTY CHINA in a 1 minute mismatched match.
MELON MUSH was savagely defeated by CAFE AU LAIT in a crowd pleasing 2 minute battle.
WILSON devastated FRED BEAR in a 1 minute one-sided match.
CUP OF TOE devastated ROBUST BREW in a popular 1 minute one-sided brawl.
CAPPUCCINO won victory over MISS DE MEANOR in a 2 minute struggle.
LOW FAT LOON was narrowly defeated by BULLSEYE in a 7 minute amateur's fight.
ICKY ICED FLEA was handily defeated by BRUTE in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
LOWELL overpowered FETAL CREEPY in a exciting 1 minute uneven fight.
ETHER was handily defeated by BEAR SKINRUG in a 1 minute mismatched battle.
SIR PRIZE was beaten by DRACONIC in a 2 minute novice's struggle.
RICHARD CRANIUM outlasted FREEBORN BLOODBLADE in a 13 minute novice's brawl.
SON YUNG MOON was vanquished by FINCH in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
AXELROD GUNNER narrowly defeated NYCADAEMON in a 2 minute beginner's fight.
BALOR was vanquished by DAMIEN BANESON in a exciting 1 minute one-sided match.
OUT TO KILL was vanquished by ANGELIKA in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
GULL was barely slain by THE KURGEN in a 2 minute bloody beginner's match.
MONICA HUMIDOR was beaten by HOMEY D. CLONE in a popular 4 minute novice's match.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                 26         PARRY-LUNGE       15 -  11 -  1      58  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  22         WALL OF STEEL     53 -  43 -  2      55  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  17         AIMED BLOW        52 -  44 -  1      54  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     16         SLASHING ATTACK   73 -  74 -  7      50  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                 14         TOTAL PARRY       83 -  85 -  1      49  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   12         LUNGING ATTACK    79 -  82 -  9      49  |
|AIMED BLOW                      11         STRIKING ATTACK  108 - 125 - 11      46  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     6         PARRY-RIPOSTE     15 -  25 -  2      38  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      4         BASHING ATTACK    59 - 100 -  4      37  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    4         PARRY-STRIKE      15 -  28 -  1      35  |

Turn 224 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

AIMED BLOW         7 -  4     BASHING ATTACK     8 -  9         4  WALL OF STEEL  
LUNGING ATTACK    13 -  9     SLASHING ATTACK    6 -  8         2  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  2     TOTAL PARRY        6 - 10         2  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  2     STRIKING ATTACK    9 - 17         1  TOTAL PARRY    
                              PARRY-STRIKE       2 -  4         1  SLASHING ATTACK
                              WALL OF STEEL      4 -  8         1  AIMED BLOW     

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
WALL OF STEEL    OSLOBEN BENBOBEN 4561      16  13  1  114 SKELETON KEY (493)
STRIKING ATTACK  MARAJUANA MAN 3411         12   4  2  105 BLACK STORM (171)
AIMED BLOW       KRAMER 5191                 9   5  0   88 SECOND BANANAS (573)
BASHING ATTACK   FIGHTING TREE 5235          9   7  1   79 LAND OF OZ (217)
SLASHING ATTACK  MINOR BLUE 5326             9   3  1   71 FEATHERS FLYIN' (585)
TOTAL PARRY      BOMBADIL 2724              14  10  0   66 FREEDONIA (32)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    BEAR NEKKID 5126           11   8  0   50 THE BEAR'S PAW (150)
PARRY-LUNGE      SWAMP LILY HAMMER 5441      5   0  0   42 ALL SWAMP HAMMERZ (594)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is AHURA MAZDA 5152.  The most popular warrior this 
turn was AHURA MAZDA 5152.  The ten other most popular fighters were GANGSTA CREEP 
BIT 5404.

The least popular fighter this week was ZOMBIE KNIGHT 3564.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were BOMBADIL 2724, RICHARD CRANIUM 5577, FREEBORN BLOODBLADE 5597, 
SON YUNG MOON 5427, and ETHER 5572.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:


The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn: