DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER

Date   : 10/23/2012    Duedate: 11/19/2012

NORTH FORK ARENA

DM-47    TURN-321

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

BIG MAC
FAST FOOD (724)
(47-7120) [17-7-0,123]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

BIG MAC                        EXPOSED
FAST FOOD (724)                HORNY GOAT X (750)
(47-7120) [17-7-0,123]         (47-7595) [6-0-1,69]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

NORM                           STING
CHEERS (659)                   SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)
(47-6227) [8-15-1,78]          (47-7656) [3-1-0,17]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

BASH BROS PARK (766)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. FAST FOOD (724)             47
2. REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)    39      LAND OF OZ (217)
3. ROYAL FLUSH (48)            37      Unchartered Team
4. TORUS (32)                  37
5. SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)     35      SHEWISH BUFFET (748)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 1*SHEWISH BUFFET (748)      15   7  0 68.2   1/15 BASH BROS PARK (766)     11  3 0
 2/ 8*ILLUMINATED ONES (767)     4   2  0 66.7   2/ 6 LES TURFISTES (727)      11  4 1
 3/ 3 LAND OF OZ (217)         682 425 24 61.6   3/ 3 CHEERS (659)             10  4 1
 4/ 6 LES TURFISTES (727)       52  33  2 61.2   4/ 7*HORNY GOAT X (750)       10  4 1
 5/ 9 SECOND BANANAS (573)     238 161 21 59.6   5/ 1*SHEWISH BUFFET (748)     10  4 0
 6/10 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)   350 240 25 59.3   6/16 FAST FOOD (724)           9  5 0
 7/14*BUBBA'S TW ARMY (754)     16  11  2 59.3   7/18*SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)   9  6 0
 8/11 ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)    90  66  3 57.7   8/14*MSNBC (755)               9  6 0
 9/12 OTTODROME TW (728)        56  43  3 56.6   9/ 2 LAND OF OZ (217)          8  6 0
10/15 ROYAL FLUSH (48)         804 620 41 56.5  10/12*BUBBA'S TW ARMY (754)     8  6 0
11/13 ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)     98  76  8 56.3  11/ 4*SATAN'S RANCHERS (770)    8  7 0
12/16*MSNBC (755)               14  11  0 56.0  12/29 LUROCIAN DEVILS (686)     8  7 0
13/ 4*DREAMS OF KADATH (762)    10   8  0 55.6  13/ 8 ROYAL FLUSH (48)          7  6 1
14/ 2*SATAN'S RANCHERS (770)    11   9  1 55.0  14/ 9*DREAMS OF KADATH (762)    7  6 0
15/19 FAST FOOD (724)           64  54  1 54.2  15/22 OTTODROME TW (728)        7  7 0
16/20 LUROCIAN DEVILS (686)     33  29  3 53.2  16/10 ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)     7  8 1
17/21 DARQUE FORCES (396)      234 210 17 52.7  17/ 5*OBG! (765)                7  8 1
18/ 0 OF WOLF & MAN (732)       26  24  0 52.0  18/20*THE WILLBURYS 47A (768)   7  8 1

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
19/23 OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)      76  72  9 51.4  19/33*REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)  7  8 0
20/27 BASH BROS PARK (766)      25  24  1 51.0  20/24 FRIENDS (759)             6  7 1
21/22 IRON LEGION (652)         29  28  2 50.9  21/27 SECOND BANANAS (573)      6  7 0
22/28*HORNY GOAT X (750)        17  17  2 50.0  22/17 DARQUE FORCES (396)       6  8 0
23/ 7*OBG! (765)                10  10  1 50.0  23/19 OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)      6  8 0
24/31*KNIGHT-CLUB (761)          9   9  0 50.0  24/23*KNIGHT-CLUB (761)         6  8 0
25/25 I HATE THEM (597)         70  72  2 49.3  25/25 MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)    6  8 0
26/24 FRIENDS (759)             26  27  1 49.1  26/11*NUKE TEST (769)           6  9 1
27/26 CHEERS (659)              54  58  4 48.2  27/13*TEAM TOONS (764)          6  9 1
28-30*THE UNHOLY ONES (772)      7   8  0 46.7  28/26 ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)    6  9 0
29/37*SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)   12  14  0 46.2  29/28 JOMSVIKINGS (756)         6  9 0
30/29*THE WILLBURYS 47A (768)    9  11  1 45.0  30/21*ERRATA! (760)             6  9 0
31/17*NUKE TEST (769)            9  11  1 45.0  31/38 IN QETERNUM (718)         5  5 0
32/35 IN QETERNUM (718)         64  86  5 42.7  32/31 I HATE THEM (597)         4  6 0
33/ 0 GLORY DISCIPLES (744)     31  42  2 42.5  33-30*THE UNHOLY ONES (772)     4  6 0
34/36 TORUS (32)               205 299 19 40.7  34/35 THE BIZZARR (716)         4  6 0
35/34 THE BIZZARR (716)         28  41  4 40.6  35/36 IRON LEGION (652)         3  3 0
36/18*TEAM TOONS (764)           8  12  1 40.0  36/32*THANATOS (771)            3  8 0
37/32*ERRATA! (760)              8  13  0 38.1  37/43 TORUS (32)                3 12 0
38/40 JOMSVIKINGS (756)         19  31  2 38.0  38/42 NEW VENGEANCE (721)       2  6 1
39/42*REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)  11  19  0 36.7  39/37*ILLUMINATED ONES (767)    1  0 0
40-41*DEVIL'S REJECTS (758)      7  13  1 35.0  40/ 0 OF WOLF & MAN (732)       1  0 0
41/39*THANATOS (771)             4  11  0 26.7  41-41*DEVIL'S REJECTS (758)     1  4 0
42/43 NEW VENGEANCE (721)       20  56  3 26.3  42/44*THE UNDERGRADS (773)      1  7 0
43/44*THE UNDERGRADS (773)       1   7  0 12.5  43/ 0 GLORY DISCIPLES (744)     0  3 0

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

     Team Thanatos stands silent behind their leader Alexander, each member wearing a
black headband, eyes upon the ground.
     Alexander raises his arms and shouts, "Gaia!"
     The team raises blazing eyes as the arena begins to shake with a rhythmic
booming.  Boom!  Boom!  Boom!  All turn as the wheel-eyed monster Kyklops lumbers out
of the tunnel and into the arena.
     Alexander sweeps an arm and points to the beast.  "Fear Kyklops!  Fear
Thanatos!"
     The team chants, "Thanatos!  Thanatos!  Thanatos!"
     Alexander throws back his head and screams, "Havoc!"
     The mighty Kyklops stamps and roars.  The arena shakes with the din.

     Peace outside the arena, mayhem within.  Let the fighting begin!

              *******************************************************

     The clouds darken over North Fork as a few teams bury their friends and swear
vengeance.  Uncle D paces the casino's floor of the Sand Box, knowing alexander will
be going after Cheers; it might turn ugly for Shiv Art.  All three members doing bad
with a total of 4-10, it was no good for the Turf Wars but even worse for the casino
--a lot of people put money on them.  Unsure of what to do, Uncle D calls a meeting
of all members, managers and warriors, to get everyone's heads in the game.
     "I want you all to know it kills me to have to stand before you and give you the
third degree about our plans going south because some people aren't doing their job.
Alex, Mandingo, and I can only coach you.  It's you fighters that must get into that
arena and do battle.  If you wish, I will gladly sit in my office and play magic and
gamble all day," Uncle D tells them sadly.
     "No, D!  I don't want that!" Honey Bartender says with tears rolling down her
face.
     "Then I need you all to put your best into your training and fights.  Don't try
to win, just do it.  So what if they have more years under their belts?  We have
heart to keep on going and skills to do what they can't!" Uncle D informs them with
pride in his eyes.
     "I would like everyone to know that Rebecca and the rest of Cheers are MINE!"
Alexander, manager of Thanatos, tells them.
     "Fine by me.  My plan is to go after M*MBO and LBA+.  We wreck their scores, we
can move up and get closer," Mandingo says.
     "Okay, I am going to put my money on all three of us," Uncle D says quietly
before heading to the bar.

       * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                         TWVIII Round 3 Summary and Scores

* Oz Feast Le Banana wins round three, creeping up the leader board.
* But LBA+ shows their stuff holding to the top spot overall. Did Grimm drill 'em?
* Only one missing team out of thirty-four. Well done, TWers!(5 of 102 to date) 
* Best team W/L of the round results: (must fight all five)
1. RND 1 Darque Forces (Master Darque) wins the round one cert with the only 5-0-0-0
record.
2. RND 2 OBG (Howlin Wolf) wins the round two cert with a 4-1-1-0, winning on kills
out of a tie amongst seven teams at 4-1.
3. RND 3 Willburys 47 (Rascally Rabbit) wins the cert on kills with a 4-1-1-0,
beating out five others with 4-1-0-0.
* Individual team leader in accumulative fight points is Shewish Buffet (OAB) with
15. 
* Team leader with most accumulative wins at 12 is Shewish Buffet (OAB).  Can we let
him get away with this nonsense?
* LBA+ has a massive lead with 30 accumulative fight points.  (No one else in
positive double digits.  (Must be that Shewish Buffet influence.)
* Round three leading alliance with most accumulative kills (three) is GSVOP.
* Round three dubious team leader with most accumulative deaths (five) is Real Men
Wear Pink (Glitter Boy)
* OFLB yet leads in accumulative style points, but M*AMBO is rapidly closing the gap.
* A team that plays together, stays together.  GSVOP members all have identical
8-7-1-0 W/L record; somehow Howlin Wolf sneaked out a few more points than the
others

ALLIANCE SCORES (Round scores/total score)
Round Points    Fight       Style Participate      Team   Total To Date
LBA+          +17          12/30        0/0     4/12           1/3     +45
OFLB          +20           9/-2        6/22    4/12           1/3     +35
M*MBO          +4          -9/2         8/16    4/12           1/3     +33
BOB           +12           7/4         0/0     4/11           1/2     +17
LOL            +8           3/-3        0/4     4/12           1/3     +16
GSVOP          -5          -9/1         0/0     3/9            1/3     +13
PMS            +4          -3/-15       2/2     4/12           1/3      +2
SHIV           -8         -12/-14       0/0     3/6            1/1      -7
FED            -5         -10/-45       2/6     3/10           0/1     -28

Fi=fight points; St=style/DM points; Tm=team participate/tournament pts
TEAM SCORES(RND 3)     Record       fi/st/tm/TOT   TOTAL RECORD  TOT FI/ST/TM/TOT

M*MBO (Master Darque)  9-11-0-1     -9/8/5/4        31-29-1-4     2/16/15/33
Fast Food (Madwand)    3-2-0-0       1/4/1/6         8-7-0-0      5/10/3/18
Darque Forces (MD)     1-4-0-1      -9/0/1/-8        8-7-0-1     -5/0/3/-2
Bubba's TW(Bubba)      3-2-0-0       0/2/1/3         8-7-1-1     -5/2/3/0
Ottodrome (Otto X)     2-3-0-0      -1/2/1/2         7-8-0-2      7/4/3/14
ALLIANCE Score                    0/0/1/1                    0/0/3/3

OFLB (Mannequin)      13-6-0-1       9/6/5/20       31-26-0-2    -2/22/15/35
Land Of Oz (Oz)        4-1-0-0       4/0/1/5        11-4-0-0     10/4/3/17
2ndBananas (Mann)      2-2-0-0       0/2/1/3         5-7-0-0     -7/6/3/2
Le Turfistes (LP)      4-1-0-0       6/2/1/9         9-6-0-0      5/6/3/14
Mystic(Slugbait)       3-2-0-1      -1/2/1/2         6-9-0-2    -10/6/3/-1
Alliance Score                    0/0/1/1                    0/0/3/3

LBA+ (Assur)          14-5-0-1      12/0/5/17       39-20-0-4    30/0/15/45
Shewish (OAB)          4-1-0-0       5/0/1/6        12-3-0-0     15/0/3/18
Horny G (Grimm)        3-2-0-0       1/0/1/2         9-6-0-3      2/0/3/5
Cheers (Otis)          4-0-0-0       7/0/1/8        10-4-0-0     13/0/3/16
Bash Bro (Assur)       3-2-0-1      -1/0/1/0        8-7-0-1       0/0/3/3
Alliance Score                    0/0/1/1                    0/0/3/3

GVSOP (Howlin Wolf)    6-9-2-0      -9/0/4/-5       24-21-3-0     1/0/12/13
Nuke (Malaquar)        3-2-1-0       0/0/1/1         8-7-1-0     -1/0/3/2
OBG (Howlin Wolf)      1-4-0-0      -6/0/1/-5        8-7-1-0      2/0/3/5
TeamToons (Baron B)    2-3-1-0      -3/0/1/-2        8-7-1-0      0/0/3/2
Alliance Score                    0/0/1/1                    0/0/3/3

LOL Stormlord)        10-9-0-0       3/0/5/8        29-29-0-3    -3/4/15/16
Alaska (Stormlord)     3-2-0-0       2/0/1/3         6-9-0-1     -1/4/3/6
Errata (JE)            4-1-0-0       4/0/1/5         7-8-0-0      1/0/3/4
Kadath (Reaper)        2-2-0-0       0/0/1/1         8-5-0-1      0/0/3/3
Serpents (Khisanth)    1-4-0-0      -3/0/1/-2        8-7-0-1     -3/0/3/0
Alliance Score                    0/0/1/1                    0/0/3/3

SHIV (Uncle D)        4-10-0-1     -12/0/4/-8       10-18-0-1    -14/0/7/-7
Knight Club (Uncle)    2-3-0-0      -2/0/1/-1        6-7-0-0     -1/0/3/2
Undergrads (Mandingo)  0-4-0-0      -4/0/1/-3        0-4-0-0     -4/0/1/-3
Thanatos (Alexander)   2-3-0-1      -6/0/1/-5        4-7-0-1     -9/0/2/-7
Alliance Score                    0/0/1/1                    0/0/1/1

PMS (Deep Thought)    9-10-0-0      -3/2/5/4        27-32-2-0   -15/2/15/2
Nanas (The Mun)        2-3-0-0      -3/0/1/-2        8-7-1-0      1/0/3/4
Friends (Scruffy)      1-3-0-0      -4/0/1/-3        6-8-1-0     -5/0/3/-2
Jomsvikings (Sigurd)   2-3-0-0      -2/2/1/1         5-10-0-0   -10/2/3/-5
MSNBC (Deep T)         4-1-0-0       6/0/1/7         8-7-0-0     -1/0/3/2
Alliance Score                    0/0/1/1                    0/0/3/3

BOB (TGG)             11-9-0-0       7/0/5/12       26-29-1-0     4/0/13/17
I Hate (Rillion)       1-4-0-0      -3/0/1/-2        4-6-0-0     -2/0/2/0
Satan's (tDO)          4-1-0-0       6/0/1/5        10-5-1-0      9/0/3/12
Willbury's (RR)        4-1-1-0       4/0/1/5         7-8-1-0      0/0/3/3
Lurocian (TGG)         2-3-0-0       0/0/1/1         5-10-0-0    -3/0/3/0
Alliance Score                     0/0/1/1                   0/0/2/2

FED (Vae Victus)       6-9-0-30    -10/2/3/-5       16-34-1-8   -45/6/11/-28
Obsidian (Skaven)      2-3-0-0      -7/2/1/-4        7-8-1-0     -9/6/3/0
Devil's (Lucifer)      0-0-0-0       0/0/0/0         2-8-0-3     -9/0/2/-7
Qeternum (VV)          2-3-0-0      -2/0/1/-1        3-7-0-0     -9/0/2/-7
RMWP (Glitter)         2-3-0-0      -1/0/1/0         4-11-0-5   -18/0/3/-15
Alliance Score                    0/0/0/0                    0/0/1/1

THE WARRIOR CHAMPIONS
Alex Trebek, Wilhelm Scream, Emily, Lawrence O'Donnell, Temptress, Suzy Suicide,
Ultima Regume, Gluttony, Latka, Dirt Bogart 

This summary was brought to you by pro Turf War Moderators Oz The All Stumbling and
Mumbling Master Darque.  (Trying a little humility in the quest for $200K salaries.)

       * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ * }%|[-----+O+-----]|%{ *

                              ---===SLOW ARENA NEWS===---

                                     Duelmasters
                                     -----------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 353): FIELDER of YOU PAY I SLAY (Khisanth, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 351): GARROT of STEEL AND SILK (Michael Eldritch, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 349): BUMBLE of BAD NEWS BEES (Stinger, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 304): WOXTON of KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 326): ANDROMEDA of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 320): BIG MAC of FAST FOOD (Madwand, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 307): 4-H of LIFE IMPACTS (Coach, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 301): ZOUM LA BOUSE of BLOOD AND GUTS! (Le Pentarque, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 286): WERE BEAR of FERAL LEGION (Seraphim, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 279): ELMINSTER of IMPROVED ILLUSION (Phantasm, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 255): DANNY HEATLEY of OTTAWA SENATORS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 255): LONDON BEEFEATER of MEAT YOUR MAKER (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 256): JEROME BETTIS of SUE'S BOYS (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 71): LIFE SCOUT of OLDIES (Coach, mgr.)
 DM 106 CRYSALIS (turn 253): THE REFEREE of AVID FANS (Crip, mgr.)

                                      Top Teams
                                      ---------
 DM   8 ARKERS (turn 353): YOU PAY I SLAY (Khisanth, mgr.)
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 351): THE WOLF PACK (Wolf, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 349): BAD NEWS BEES (Stinger, mgr.)
 DM  39 XOCHITHLAN (turn 304): KIWI CONNECTION (The Mun, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 326): DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 320): SHEWISH BUFFET (One Armed Bandit, mgr.)
 DM  50 SNOWBOUND (turn 307): LIFE IMPACTS (Coach, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 301): DARQUE AGES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 286): TRADERS OF TROCAR (Jorja, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 279): IMPROVED ILLUSION (Phantasm, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 255): WRATHMEN XIV (Kharadmon, mgr.)
 DM  72 DRAGONHEAD (turn 255): MONGREL HORDE (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  73 ERINIKA (turn 256): WORLDWIDE GORE (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 71): OLDIES (Coach, mgr.)
 DM 106 CRYSALIS (turn 253): SPARF! et al (Crip, mgr.)

                                   Recent Graduates
                                   ----------------
 DM  28 MORYA (turn 351): MADELINE of DODGE BULLETS (Jorja, mgr.)
              (turn 350): COLGATE SMILE of MY GENERATION (Storm Lord, mgr.)
 DM  31 CHIMLEVTAL (turn 348): BUZZ-BUZZ of BAD NEWS BEES (Stinger, mgr.)
 DM  45 STORMCROWE (turn 326): ANDROMEDA of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  47 NORTH FORK (turn 320): QUEEN OF TARTS of MYSTIC ORC FEAST (slugbait, mgr.)
                               BROOMSTICK of LAND OF OZ (Oz, mgr.)
                   (turn 319): GIZMO of DARQUE FORCES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  52 FRATSFA (turn 300): ANASTASIUS of DARQUE AGES (Master Darque, mgr.)
 DM  54 TROCAR (turn 285): TONG PAK FU of ASIAN INVASION (Pec Killer, mgr.)
 DM  59 ILLIS (turn 279): ELMINSTER of IMPROVED ILLUSION (Phantasm, mgr.)
              (turn 278): APPLESEED of IMPROVED ILLUSION (Phantasm, mgr.)
 DM  71 KYR'TERR (turn 254): B'ZIADUL of WRATHMEN XIV (Kharadmon, mgr.)
                             AFTERSHOCK of SLAMMA JAMMA (Marma Duke, mgr.)
                             ALBUQUERQUE of WESTERN FRONTIER (Crip, mgr.)
 DM  83 TELORINTHE (turn 69): MORIS NAHR of MIDDLE WAY 21 (Jorja, mgr.)

                                      SPY REPORT

     Busy, busy, busy, lots of things happening in NORTH FORK this turn, and let's 
start with a look at some of the teams.  It seems the training can make the 
difference, as SHEWISH BUFFET is pushed out of top team by BASH BROS PARK, who came 
from 15th with a 4-0-0 this turn.  Now, what did these guys have for breakfast this 
morning?  BASH BROS PARK has turned a 4-0-0 into 1st place from 15th.  Give me the 
recipe!  I want to know who's buying the drinks for who tonight at The Dripping 
Blade, seeing as SERPENTS HOLD 200's 12-14-0 has earned them 7th place in the ranks.  
I understand that The Dripping Blade is buying the drinks for LUROCIAN DEVILS 
tonight, to honor their rise to 12th after this turns 3-2-0.  Hmmm.  OBG! must be 
either in pain, or numb, having dropped from 5th to 17th this turn, with a 1-4-0 
acting as the weight.  Now, what did these guys have for breakfast this morning?  
REAL MEN WEAR PINK has turned a 4-1-0 into 19th place from 33rd.  Give me the recipe! 
It doesn't rain, but it pours for NUKE TEST this turn, a 1-4-0 causing a 15 flight 
drop in the team rankings.  Hand that team a dry towel.  Our condolences (or sneers, 
as the case may be) go out to TEAM TOONS for their drop to 27th from 13th.  A 0-5-0 
can do that.  The LES TURFISTES guild has had a 4-1-1 turn and deserves to be watched 
in the future.  You never know where this kind of thing can lead.  And let's see, 
SLUGBAIT fought PETIT JARDINIA and gained 25 points and contributed to I HATE THEM's 
3-2-0.  PETIT JARDINIA has lost to SLUGBAIT, falling 36 points, while helping make 
LES TURFISTES a 4-1-1 turn.  DRAGO KAZOV challenged for the Duelmastership this turn, 
attempting to dethrone FAST FOOD's warrior.  The attempts to dethrone the Duelmaster 
have failed, and BIG MAC remains NORTH FORK's top warrior for another turn.  By the 
way, was that our Duelmaster that I saw last night, cramped under the table at The 
Dripping Blade?   
     I tell you, a green quarterstaff lasts longer than a seasoned sapling.  A basher 
friend of mine assures me this is true.  SHEWISH BUFFET has cause to stand tall, as 
they were NORTH FORK's most avoided team.  A smart manager knows this is a team to 
beat.  And avoiding SHEWISH BUFFET more than any other team we find SATAN'S RANCHERS. 
NORTH FORK, are we going to accept, or respect this sort of thing?  The most 
challenged warrior this turn was SHEWISH BUFFET's warrior AMBITIOUS LARD.  More 
fighters challenged him than challenged the Duelmaster!  I don't know about you, but 
ULTIMA REGUM challenging down 22 points to LES TURFISTES' YORL, is not really worthy 
of IN QETERNUM.  Well, surprise, surprise, ULTIMA REGUM was overcame by YORL, and by 
the way, ULTIMA REGUM now has a recognition score of 75.  Tsk, tsk, tsk.  RAVAGE, 
does your manager know you're challenging down 16 points to fight PRACTICAL GENE from 
OTTODROME TW?  It pains me to see warriors take advantage of the system like this.  
RAVAGE defeated PRACTICAL GENE, as if it surprises anyone.  Well now, what do you 
expect when someone like DIRT BOGART from LES TURFISTES challenges down 26 points to 
fight OPPENHEIMER of BUBBA'S TW ARMY?  I thought challenges were for warriors, not 
cowards looking for easy wins.  DIRT BOGART put to death OPPENHEIMER, is nothing 
sacred?  Tsk, tsk, tsk.  GLUTTONY, does your manager know you're challenging down 20 
points to fight FEZZIK from THE BIZZARR?  We're not surprised to hear that GLUTTONY 
overcame FEZZIK, but I bet it would be interesting to hear why OBSIDIAN ORDER made 
such a challenge.  In a brave attempt, DR HEAD TRIP from THE UNDERGRADS challenged up 
23 points to fight GAUTREK from the JOMSVIKINGS stable.  DR HEAD TRIP perhaps got his 
just desserts, seeing as he was bested by GAUTREK and ended up with 2 recognition 
points.   
     The Dark Arena is for those who cannot win, not who cannot lose with grace.  
Dignity in life or death is the warrior's creed.  The manager of BUBBA'S TW ARMY will 
not be pleased to learn that OPPENHEIMER, a 3-0-1 fighter, has been killed at the 
hands of LES TURFISTES' DIRT BOGART.  Whatever bright future LAWRENCE O'DONNELL may 
have had, it's all history now.  The manager of MSNBC has lost a promising 3-1-0 
warrior.  Seriously now, is it really honorable for EXPOSED from HORNY GOAT X to kill 
PAT and give ALL-STAR NANA'S the chance to bloodfeud?  Mmmm, could be.  LES 
TURFISTES, with any luck BUBBA'S TW ARMY will successfully bloodfeud DIRT BOGART for 
killing such a warrior as OPPENHEIMER.  Have a little decency, will ya?  The Dripping 
Blade declares a free round for QUEEN OF TARTS and all of MYSTIC ORC FEAST, for 
having revenged THE WILLBURYS 47A's DUMBO for killing one of their comrades.  Kudos 
go out to ALEX TREBEK this turn, for revenging BUBBA'S TW ARMY's bloodfeud against 
OBG!'s warrior WHAT'D I SAY.  Well done.  Congratulations go out to BASH BROS PARK, 
with NO BATHROOM revenging a bloodfeud against SNAGGLEPUSS of TEAM TOONS.  Is it 
really true that NORTH FORK has more dishwashers per capita that fighters?  Just 
thought I'd ask...   
     Thought for the day, a new sword shines bright, but the notched sword sings the 
sweetest.  Well, I'm burning daylight here in NORTH FORK and I've a long road ahead 
of me.  Happy Trails.  Until you see my quill in NORTH FORK again, farewell-- Alarond 
the Scribe  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 BIG MAC 7120                 17   7  0   123       FAST FOOD (724)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 WILHELM SCREAM 7162          15   5  0   121       OTTODROME TW (728)
 FROSTY 7332                  13   7  0   111       FAST FOOD (724)
 TEMPTRESS 6671                9   3  0   106       LUROCIAN DEVILS (686)
 SLUGBAIT 6329                10   1  1   105       I HATE THEM (597)
 TALKEETNA 7047               20  15  0   102       ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)
-WRATH 7428                   11   7  3    96       OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)
 RAVAGE 7061                  14  16  2    95       OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)
 LATKA 6940                   14   6  1    95       SECOND BANANAS (573)
-TENTH INNING 7255            10  13  0    95       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 BLIZZARD 7119                12   8  0    93       FAST FOOD (724)
 DR. COX 7009                 10   4  1    93       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 YORL 7153                    10   5  0    91       LES TURFISTES (727)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DRAGO KAZOV 7100             15  13  1    89       OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)
 FRASIER 6224                 14  10  0    89       CHEERS (659)
 NORTON 7010                  10   7  0    85       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 PETIT JARDINIA 7154          12   5  0    82       LES TURFISTES (727)
 PAUL 6861                     6   2  0    79       CHEERS (659)
 NORM 6227                     8  15  1    78       CHEERS (659)
 THUNDERCRACKER 7467           6   5  0    78       DARQUE FORCES (396)
 NO BATHROOM 7764             11   2  1    77       BASH BROS PARK (766)
 ULTIMA REGUM 7076            18  12  0    75       IN QETERNUM (718)
-HAMMER 6170                   6   5  0    73       IRON LEGION (652)
 CARLA 6225                   11  12  1    72       CHEERS (659)
 DIRT BOGART 7430              8   4  2    72       LES TURFISTES (727)
 SOUTH SPOON 7161             11  10  1    70       OTTODROME TW (728)
 ACE HARDWARE 7492             7   3  0    69       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 EXPOSED 7595                  6   0  1    69       HORNY GOAT X (750)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 PRACTICAL GENE 7349           9  10  1    66       OTTODROME TW (728)
 ALEX TREBEK 7624              7   1  1    65       BUBBA'S TW ARMY (754)
 SEWARD FOLLY 7436            12   6  0    62       ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)
-BLADE 6168                    8   4  0    62       IRON LEGION (652)
 ARCHER 7216                   8   6  0    61       OF WOLF & MAN (732)
-EMERALD 7478                 10   5  0    59       LAND OF OZ (217)
 BLITZWING 7371                7   9  0    57       DARQUE FORCES (396)
 BRAVE NEW RODENT 7754         6   3  0    57       BASH BROS PARK (766)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 RAGLIN 7067                   8   6  0    56       THE BIZZARR (716)
 ASTROTRAIN 7352              11   8  0    55       DARQUE FORCES (396)
 EMILY 7453                    7   5  0    55       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
 ASYLUM 7297                   6   7  1    54       NEW VENGEANCE (721)
 JACK B. NIMBLE 7446           9   7  0    53       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 CANUM MOERDART 7531           7   4  0    53       IN QETERNUM (718)
 SOULTAKER 5455               11   9  0    52       I HATE THEM (597)
-WITCH DOCTOR 7215             9   3  0    52       OF WOLF & MAN (732)
-CHRISTOS 7549                 7   7  1    51       GLORY DISCIPLES (744)
 YRSA 7671                     6   4  0    50       JOMSVIKINGS (756)
 DING DONG 7516                8   3  1    49       LAND OF OZ (217)
 ASP 7591                      3   1  0    49       SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)
-DONETO 7534                   5   2  1    48       OTTODROME TW (728)
 WRAITH 6587                   7   6  2    46       LUROCIAN DEVILS (686)
 CHRIS MATTHEWS 7631           3   1  0    46       MSNBC (755)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 CRESCENT 6167                 7   6  0    45       IRON LEGION (652)
 ELDER THANG 7731              4   0  0    45       DREAMS OF KADATH (762)
 KHAN 7503                     7   6  1    43       OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)
 DILECTONON FERIO 7483         5  10  0    41       IN QETERNUM (718)
 THE CREEPSTER 6328            9   7  0    40       I HATE THEM (597)
 ACCUSER 6589                  7   5  0    40       LUROCIAN DEVILS (686)
 VENOMOUS CLEMENTINE 7580      4   0  0    40       SHEWISH BUFFET (748)
 MASTER DARQUE 6835            8   3  0    39       I HATE THEM (597)
-STARSCREAM 7419               6  10  0    38       DARQUE FORCES (396)
 AEGRE ID MILES 7659           5   1  0    38       IN QETERNUM (718)
 EVIL ONE 6586                 6   6  1    37       LUROCIAN DEVILS (686)
 TAINTED WHEAT 7725            4   0  0    37       HORNY GOAT X (750)
 FENCE 7498                    9   5  0    36       LAND OF OZ (217)
 ICE WIND 7758                 3   1  0    36       BASH BROS PARK (766)
 EINSTEIN 7622                 3   2  0    35       BUBBA'S TW ARMY (754)
-BRO'TOR 7546                  6   8  0    34       GLORY DISCIPLES (744)
 CHICKEN A LA KING 7583        4   2  1    34       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 ODOBAN 7715                   3   1  0    34       ERRATA! (760)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 TURQ 7548                     8   6  1    33       GLORY DISCIPLES (744)
-WENDY 7552                    4   3  1    33       FAST FOOD (724)
 JOEY 7708                     8   2  0    32       FRIENDS (759)
 RU BRINGER 7510               3   1  0    32       LES TURFISTES (727)
 QUEEN OF THE SOUTH 7774       3   0  1    31       ROYAL FLUSH (48)
 CONVICTED BEEF 7578           3   1  0    31       SHEWISH BUFFET (748)
 DYLAN RATIGAN 7634            3   2  0    30       MSNBC (755)
 LOS ALAMOS 7801               2   2  0    30       NUKE TEST (769)
 NIINE 7064                    7   7  1    29       THE BIZZARR (716)
 TUUMS 7065                    6   8  3    29       THE BIZZARR (716)
 KIKI 7485                     5   3  0    29       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
 LILY UPTIGHT 7722             2   1  0    28       KNIGHT-CLUB (761)
-AXEL 7816                     3   0  0    27       THE UNHOLY ONES (772)
 GAUTREK 7666                  4   4  0    26       JOMSVIKINGS (756)
 REBECCA 7789                  3   1  1    26       CHEERS (659)
 BULL LONEY 7804               3   1  0    26       SATAN'S RANCHERS (770)
 HAM BURGLAR 7698              2   2  0    26       FAST FOOD (724)
-CAPTURED PORK 7581            2   2  0    26       SHEWISH BUFFET (748)
 GLUTTONY 7539                 7   4  0    25       OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)
 RACHAEL MADDOW 7632           3   3  0    25       MSNBC (755)
 JONHY BOUNCER 7718            3   1  0    25       KNIGHT-CLUB (761)
 SARAPHINE 7063                5   9  0    24       THE BIZZARR (716)
 AMBITIOUS LARD 7582           4   1  0    24       SHEWISH BUFFET (748)
-MONICA 7706                   3   1  1    24       FRIENDS (759)
 DOG ON THE LOOSE 7756         3   1  0    24       BASH BROS PARK (766)
 AVER 7667                     2   7  1    24       JOMSVIKINGS (756)
 CHRIS HAYES 7695              2   2  0    24       MSNBC (755)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 VOLUND 7670                   3   7  1    23       JOMSVIKINGS (756)
 THE GOLDEN EGG 7806           3   1  1    23       SATAN'S RANCHERS (770)
 LEGION 7440                   3   2  0    23       LUROCIAN DEVILS (686)
 DUMBO 7791                    2   2  1    23       THE WILLBURYS 47A (768)
 ROOT WIZARD 7660              2   2  0    23       BUBBA'S TW ARMY (754)
 SNAGGLEPUSS 7739              1   3  1    23       TEAM TOONS (764)
 ENCORE DEBOUT 7788            3   1  0    22       LES TURFISTES (727)
 FAIRBANKS GLOW 7639           5   4  0    21       ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)
 MIMI 7450                     4   3  0    21       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 MY LAST TWENTY 7793           2   2  0    21       THE WILLBURYS 47A (768)
 MY LITTLE GTO 7745            2   2  0    21       OBG! (765)
 BIKINI ATOLL 7799             3   1  0    20       NUKE TEST (769)
 COBRA 7704                    3   1  0    20       SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)
 ZEKE 7584                     3   3  0    20       LAND OF OZ (217)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 DUNGEON PORTER 7837           2   1  0    20       HORNY GOAT X (750)
 FIRE ANT 7830                 1   2  0    20       REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)
 RACHEL 7711                   4   7  0    19       FRIENDS (759)
-SUZY SUICIDE 7682             3   1  1    19       DEVIL'S REJECTS (758)
 LUMBER JACK 7723              1   4  0    19       REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)
 LONELY TRUCHER 7724           5   0  0    18       REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)
 GRIMHILD 7668                 4   6  0    18       JOMSVIKINGS (756)
 TEACUPS 7790                  4   0  0    18       THE WILLBURYS 47A (768)
 JEZEBEL 7367                  4   6  0    18       NEW VENGEANCE (721)
 WAKING DREAMS 7728            3   1  0    18       DREAMS OF KADATH (762)
 WHAT'D I SAY 7742             1   3  1    18       OBG! (765)
-MILK STOUT 7594               1   3  0    18       HORNY GOAT X (750)
 HOT HANDS 7823                1   1  0    18       THE UNDERGRADS (773)
 ADEO MORI SERVUS 7782         1   2  0    18       IN QETERNUM (718)
 STING 7656                    3   1  0    17       SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)
 ROOSTER COGBURN 7807          2   2  0    17       SATAN'S RANCHERS (770)
 DEPUTY FIFE 7768              2   2  0    17       SECOND BANANAS (573)
 THE SAGE WARD 7849            2   0  0    17       TORUS (32)
 M. CHARDONNAY 7687            2   2  0    16       SHEWISH BUFFET (748)
 BUGS 7737                     2   2  0    16       TEAM TOONS (764)
 NK 7800                       2   2  0    16       NUKE TEST (769)
 FRENCH FRY PIE 7832           2   1  0    16       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 MIGHTY MANFRED 7738           3   1  0    14       TEAM TOONS (764)
 THE DARK ONE 7747             2   1  0    14       I HATE THEM (597)
 LENOLIN LIGHTBEARER 7776      2   0  0    14       ILLUMINATED ONES (767)
 MAUL CHOLESTEROL 7657         1   3  0    14       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 REBEL SCUM 7843               1   1  0    13       OTTODROME TW (728)
 OH BOY 7746                   2   2  0    12       OBG! (765)
 ATROCITY AWAKENED 7729        2   2  0    12       DREAMS OF KADATH (762)
-WARLORD 7819                  2   1  0    12       THE UNHOLY ONES (772)
 BILL 7645                     1   3  0    12       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
 PARA 7767                     1   3  0    12       ERRATA! (760)
 RON 7507                      1   3  0    12       ALL-STAR NANA'S (457)
 CAPTAIN PEACHFUZZ 7741        1   3  0    12       TEAM TOONS (764)
 MR HECKLES 7797               3   1  0    11       FRIENDS (759)
 CHARLIE CLIPBOARD 7720        2   2  0    11       KNIGHT-CLUB (761)
 AXEMAN EWING 7808             2   2  0    11       SATAN'S RANCHERS (770)
-SARAH 7820                    1   1  0    11       THE UNHOLY ONES (772)
-SUCCUBUS 7836                 1   0  0    11       DEVIL'S REJECTS (758)
 SKY PILOT 7769                3   1  0    10       OBG! (765)
 CLANCY 7713                   1   3  0    10       ERRATA! (760)
 SHADOW OF A SEASON 7727       1   3  0    10       DREAMS OF KADATH (762)
 HIRO 7803                     1   3  0    10       NUKE TEST (769)
 THE AGED MONK 7856            1   0  0    10       TORUS (32)
 DEEJAY SPINNER 7719           2   2  0     9       KNIGHT-CLUB (761)
 SURFER JOE 7770               2   2  0     8       OBG! (765)
 LAKEFRONT 7714                2   2  0     8       ERRATA! (760)
 SITKA SERENITY 7796           1   3  0     8       ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)
 SCALES 7833                   2   1  0     7       SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)
 VALDEZ VENGEANCE 7834         1   2  0     7       ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)
 CHERRI BOMB 7716              1   3  0     7       ERRATA! (760)
 SMALL WORLD 7794              1   3  0     6       THE WILLBURYS 47A (768)
 TOUPEE ARNOLD 7805            1   3  0     6       SATAN'S RANCHERS (770)
 RATTLER 7654                  1   3  0     6       SERPENTS HOLD 200 (749)
-JOCLYN JOYBRINGER 7777        1   0  0     6       ILLUMINATED ONES (767)
 POSEIDON 7812                 1   1  0     6       THANATOS (771)
-SYANNE SHADEBREAKER 7780      1   0  0     6       ILLUMINATED ONES (767)
-JACK THE RIPPER 7684          1   3  0     6       DEVIL'S REJECTS (758)
 SLUG 7841                     1   1  0     6       REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)
 FLY PIZZA PIE 7646            1   3  0     6       MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
 MIGHTY MANFRED 7771           1   3  0     6       TEAM TOONS (764)
-CHUCKY 7683                   1   3  0     6       DEVIL'S REJECTS (758)
-KWEEN 7818                    1   2  0     5       THE UNHOLY ONES (772)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 HORNET 7842                   1   1  0     5       REAL MEN WEAR PINK (757)
 URANUS 7811                   1   2  0     5       THANATOS (771)
-BUBBA GUMP 7852               1   0  0     5       BUBBA'S TW ARMY (754)
 OLD N BITTER 7851             1   1  0     4       HORNY GOAT X (750)
 HELIOS 7809                   0   4  0     4       THANATOS (771)
 SELENE 7810                   0   3  0     4       THANATOS (771)
 FLOWER POWER 7792             0   4  0     4       THE WILLBURYS 47A (768)
 JAMICE 7798                   0   4  0     4       FRIENDS (759)
 FEZZIK 7439                   0   3  0     3       THE BIZZARR (716)
 HONEY BARTENDER 7721          0   3  0     3       KNIGHT-CLUB (761)
-CORWYN 7821                   0   2  0     2       THE UNHOLY ONES (772)
 MONSTER 7825                  0   2  0     2       THE UNDERGRADS (773)
 DR HEAD TRIP 7826             0   2  0     2       THE UNDERGRADS (773)
-PETROCIAN PEACEMAKER 7778     0   1  0     1       ILLUMINATED ONES (767)
 MAXHEME 7822                  0   1  0     1       THE UNDERGRADS (773)
 JUDAS 7858                    0   1  0     1       NEW VENGEANCE (721)
-BRING IT 7824                 0   1  0     1       THE UNDERGRADS (773)
 THE DISCIPLE 7857             0   1  0     1       TORUS (32)
 RANDOM HERO 7859              0   1  0     1       NEW VENGEANCE (721)
-EDARD EYEBRIGHT 7779          0   1  0     1       ILLUMINATED ONES (767)
 WRECKLESS 7860                0   1  0     1       NEW VENGEANCE (721)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD                W  L K TEAM NAME            SLAIN BY              TURN Revenge?
PAT 7644                2  2 1 ALL-STAR NANA'S 457  EXPOSED 7595          321   
CLOSED MONDAYS 7749     1  2 0 BASH BROS PARK 766   SNAGGLEPUSS 7739      320  JUST REVENGED
OPPENHEIMER 7625        3  1 1 BUBBA'S TW ARMY 754  DIRT BOGART 7430      321   
SERIAL COWBOY 7661      0  2 0 BUBBA'S TW ARMY 754  WHAT'D I SAY 7742     319  JUST REVENGED
LBA GROUPIE 7854        0  1 0 DARQUE FORCES 396    ROYAL PAIN            321  NONE
LEMURE 7686             1  2 0 DEVIL'S REJECTS 758  BLACK BOLT 7664       318   
DA1 7862                0  1 0 DREAMS OF KADATH 762 PIZZA VILLAIN         321  NONE
NAVIGATOR'S TALE 7730   0  1 0 DREAMS OF KADATH 762 OPPENHEIMER 7625      318   
CHANDLER 7705           4  3 0 FRIENDS 759          CARLA 6225            317  NOT REVENGED
DEI-MAN 7547            2  6 0 GLORY DISCIPLES 744  CARNIVOROUS FROG      321  NONE
KINGDOM 7627            1  2 0 GLORY DISCIPLES 744  CARNIVOROUS FROG      321  NONE
DIRTY LAGER 7838        0  1 0 HORNY GOAT X 750     PAT 7644              319  JUST REVENGED
LAWRENCE O'DONNE 7635   3  2 0 MSNBC 755            ASYLUM 7297           321   
HAY PATE 7647           0  3 0 MYSTIC ORC FEAST 416 DUMBO 7791            320  JUST REVENGED
LUMINOUS LOX 6495      11  9 0 MYSTIC ORC FEAST 416 WRATH 7428            318  REVENGED
WHO'S NEXT 7505         1  1 0 NEW VENGEANCE 721    SIBERIAN WASTES 7802  320   
SIBERIAN WASTES 7802    1  3 1 NUKE TEST 769        QUEEN OF THE SOU 7774 321   
LACE MUTTON 7676        0  2 0 REAL MEN WEAR PI 757 VOLUND 7670           317  NOT REVENGED
WASP 7829               0  1 0 REAL MEN WEAR PI 757 MONICA 7706           319   
FANG 7688               0  1 0 SERPENTS HOLD 20 749 THE GOLDEN EGG 7806   318   
GAIA 7813               2  1 0 THANATOS 771         REBECCA 7789          320   
GODSPEED 7850           0  2 0 TORUS 32             TOTO'S REVENGE        321  NONE
MARCUS AURELIUS 7846    0  2 0 TORUS 32             FRENCH FRYER          321  NONE

                                     PERSONAL ADS

All -- I, Grimm, would like to announce Exposed 7595 as my Champion in the TW.  Man,
he is going to rock this place. -- Grimm

Mun -- No shame in killing my cute lunger.  The bad news is I have 4 turns to enact
revenge; revenge, I tells ya. -- Grimm

Pat -- After your brief stint on Saturday Night Live, I will finally come to
determine your true gender identity. -- Exposed

All -- The LBA highbred is struting in the streets of North Fork, Assur will lead us
to victory. -- Grimm

OFLB -- Do you guys have anything but style masters?  You realize that will not last.
-- Grimm

Fellow BoBs -- Need my help, guide me in your quest to pillage this city. -- Grimm

Are we still under the iron grip of a Big Mac?? -- LP

Well done, LBA, I guess... -- LP

Good luck, all, for the upcoming tournament!  May you give OFLB a lot of victories!
-- Le Pentarque

Queen Of Tarts -- It will be my pleasure to escort you to The Isle.  We both deserve
it. -- Broomstick

TTI (To Those Interested) -- Broomstick, a mode striker, was 15(+1)-4(+1)-10-15-15-
14-13 and had faves of GS, Mod/Low, Slash tactic, learns parry. -- Oz The All Knowing

Oz & Master Darque -- My Lord and Lady, <devilish grin> though I am honored at being
mentioned as of turn 320, it pains me that I must respond to being called the team
leader with the most accumulated deaths, if only for morale purposes and recruiting.
(I would undoubtedbly be the FIRST team to have warriors refuse to fight!  lol)  And
though my team may indeed be like the Bay of Pigs or Omaha Beach during the Normandy
invasion, I must confess.  I have high standards for my warriors, or exceptional luck
with the survivors.  I do, however, plan on correcting my dubious distinction and
passing that bloody torch to somebody else.  Though I am far from being as wise and
experienced as someone with more than 1,000 fights, or Master Darque's equally
impressive experience, I am learning.  I do have good, if somewhat strange, friends
in this alliance.  Specifically Vae Victus.  Have I told you about his socks?  But
until I learn more, I do of course bow to both of your exceptional skills. *bashful
smile* -- Glitter Boy

All -- I would like to declare my team's new champion:  Lonely Truchor!  May he live
longer than the average fighter in my team! *smile* -- Glitter Boy

Bash Bros Park -- Aw, too bad.  Monday's been closed. -- Alexander

     That happens a lot.  The whole state of Kansas closes on Monday, for instance.

All -- Here cometh Kyklops.

All -- Shiv Art!  Shiv Art!  Shiv Art!

Aegre Id Miles -- Okay, you did not enjoy the music, but hey--I only play it, I don't
make it! -- Deejay Spinner

French Fry Pie -- You are cute yet MEAN.  I like it, you're just like me. -- Honey
Bartender

Ron -- Lying in the hospital, I realized I don't like you and I will never let you
get V.I.P. at the Club! :( -- Charlie Clipboard

Mr. Heckles -- You never stood a chance.  You need to tell Scruffy Puff to let you
retire. -- Johny Bouncer

Cobra -- WOW!  Really, that's all you got?  Very sad! -- Lily Uptight

LBA+ -- There are only two things I don't like:  1) Show-offs and 2) People who make
me lose money.  You're doing BOTH! -- Uncle D

All -- Being the new kid on, I didn't think it would be good manners to come in the
arena and dominate.  So I played possum.  NOW let the war begin! -- Mandingoe, mgr.
of The Undergrads

Dark One -- This is the first time I've been taken advantage of in the dark.  But
remember, the hand is quicker than the eye. *wink wink* -- Hot Hands

Cheri Bomb -- Are you serious!  Cheri Bomb!  The way you smashed, you should be an
atomic bomb. -- Monster

All -- I got beat by a girl.  Maybe drinking all night at the Sand Box before my
fight wasn't smart. -- Dr. Head Trip

Rattler -- They say that rattlesnakes are deadly.  Well, I think you are a snake, Mr.
Rattler.  I WILL see you again. -- Bring IT!

Uncle D -- Love the spots!  But I recommend you fire your odds makers.  LBA+ is in
the process of running away with everything and clearly should be getting much better
odds.  But I suppose odds are never about truth, but about making money for yourself.
And it'd be pretty embarrassing if the Oz was caught betting against his own
warriors. -- Assur

Oz -- Fighting above our ability?  If we had any, we might consider that an insult.
As it is, it is an embarrassment to everyone else in the Turf War, losing to us. --
Assur

Might as well just give the first half points to LBA+...

Looking forward to seeing some huge DCing going on the next few turns.  One hint:
Don't lose them!  Because when the arena turns to bringing the hammer down on LBA+,
if you aren't successful with huge FE advantage, the humiliation will just be that
much greater! -- Assur

Snagglepuss -- A close fight with an unfortunate result (for you).  Expect to be
terrorized in the park for the next few months.

Surfer Joe -- No waves here and the wind will rip right through your wetsuit. -- Ice
Wind

Toupee Arnold -- I am a dog, but your teammates think you are. -- Dog on the Loose

Lurocian Devils -- With those matchups, I'll gladly take 1-1! -- Assur

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

DEI-MAN was butchered by CARNIVOROUS FROG in a 2 minute bloody Dark Arena fight.
MARCUS AURELIUS was slaughtered by FRENCH FRYER in a 1 minute Dark Arena battle.
GODSPEED was savagely slain by TOTO'S REVENGE in a 1 minute gruesome Dark Arena fight.
KINGDOM was butchered by CARNIVOROUS FROG in a 1 minute gory Dark Arena contest.
LBA GROUPIE was assassinated by ROYAL PAIN in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena match.
DA1 was butchered by PIZZA VILLAIN in a 1 minute Dark Arena duel.
QUEEN OF TARTS outlasted DUMBO in a 7 minute one-sided Bloodfeud struggle.
NO BATHROOM handily defeated SNAGGLEPUSS in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud fight.
ALEX TREBEK vanquished WHAT'D I SAY in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud duel.
EXPOSED slaughtered PAT in a 1 minute uneven Bloodfeud fight.
SELENE lost to REBECCA in a exciting 2 minute gruesome novice's Bloodfeud fight.
DRAGO KAZOV was overpowered by BIG MAC in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge Title fight.
BROOMSTICK was demolished by FROSTY in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge competition.
ULTIMA REGUM was viciously subdued by YORL in a 3 minute veteran's Challenge battle.
RAVAGE handily defeated PRACTICAL GENE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge conflict.
NORTON luckily beat NORM in a action packed 3 minute expert's Challenge struggle.
BLIZZARD devastated CARLA in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge brawl.
DIRT BOGART assassinated OPPENHEIMER in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
THUNDERCRACKER overpowered EMILY in a popular 1 minute one-sided Challenge bout.
SEWARD FOLLY overcame YRSA in a 1 minute Challenge competition.
DING DONG unbelievably bested DILECTONON FERIO in a popular 3 minute Challenge bout.
CANUM MOERDART demolished TUUMS in a 1 minute uneven Challenge bout.
LAWRENCE O'DONNELL was slaughtered by ASYLUM in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fray.
TAINTED WHEAT overpowered ROOSTER COGBURN in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge match.
ELDER THANG overpowered AMBITIOUS LARD in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
CHICKEN A LA KING savagely defeated SARAPHINE in a popular 5 minute Challenge duel.
FAIRBANKS GLOW was demolished by KHAN in a 2 minute one-sided Challenge melee.
AEGRE ID MILES won victory over NIINE in a 2 minute Challenge fray.
MAUL CHOLESTEROL was overpowered by ROOT WIZARD in a 1 minute Challenge fray.
OH BOY was unbelievably bested by TEACUPS in a exciting 6 minute gory Challenge duel.
MY LITTLE GTO overpowered FLY PIZZA PIE in a popular 1 minute uneven Challenge duel.
GLUTTONY subdued FEZZIK in a 4 minute veteran vs. novice Challenge fight.
ATROCITY AWAKENED was savagely defeated by RACHAEL MADDOW in a 3 minute bout.
HAM BURGLAR viciously subdued RACHEL in a popular 3 minute bloody Challenge duel.
WAKING DREAMS subdued CHERRI BOMB in a 2 minute Challenge match.
REBEL SCUM devastated HONEY BARTENDER in a 1 minute uneven Challenge bout.
POSEIDON was overpowered by ICE WIND in a 3 minute one-sided Challenge match.
CLANCY was handily defeated by EINSTEIN in a 1 minute uneven Challenge match.
TOUPEE ARNOLD was beaten by BILL in a 2 minute Challenge bout.
URANUS was vanquished by COBRA in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge bout.
HOT HANDS demolished LAKEFRONT in a 1 minute uneven Challenge competition.
THE GOLDEN EGG narrowly defeated BUGS in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
HORNET was subdued by NK in a 2 minute Challenge duel.
SURFER JOE was vanquished by DEPUTY FIFE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge struggle.
DOG ON THE LOOSE handily defeated SMALL WORLD in a 2 minute mismatched Challenge duel.
JONHY BOUNCER defeated THE DARK ONE in a 1 minute Challenge brawl.
AXEMAN EWING was overpowered by RU BRINGER in a 1 minute uneven Challenge competition.
DR HEAD TRIP was viciously subdued by GAUTREK in a exciting 3 minute Challenge match.
LUMBER JACK outlasted ZEKE in a dull 8 minute Challenge fight.
SLUG beat MONSTER in a 3 minute beginner's Challenge bout.
CHARLIE CLIPBOARD luckily beat RATTLER in a 4 minute beginner's Challenge competition.
FIRE ANT viciously subdued MIMI in a 2 minute brutal Challenge bout.
HELIOS was luckily beaten by MR HECKLES in a 3 minute novice's Challenge fight.
LILY UPTIGHT handily defeated RON in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge contest.
LENOLIN LIGHTBEARER beat VALDEZ VENGEANCE in a 3 minute novice's Challenge struggle.
QUEEN OF THE SOUTH butchered SIBERIAN WASTES in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge fight.
PETIT JARDINIA was demolished by SLUGBAIT in a 1 minute mismatched battle.
WILHELM SCREAM overpowered DR. COX in a popular 1 minute mismatched duel.
FRASIER was defeated by TALKEETNA in a 3 minute master's brawl.
TEMPTRESS devastated ACE HARDWARE in a 1 minute one-sided bout.
SOUTH SPOON was overpowered by PAUL in a 1 minute one-sided duel.
LATKA handily defeated KUNG-FU MASTER in a popular 1 minute mismatched battle.
CRESCENT was bested by RAGLIN in a 1 minute fight.
SOULTAKER beat LOS ALAMOS in a 2 minute brawl.
CONVICTED BEEF was demolished by JACK B. NIMBLE in a 1 minute uneven duel.
ASP overpowered FENCE in a 2 minute gory one-sided fight.
THE CREEPSTER was viciously subdued by ARCHER in a exciting 3 minute brutal duel.
EVIL ONE was savagely defeated by VENOMOUS CLEMENTINE in a 2 minute gory duel.
ODOBAN was overpowered by BRAVE NEW RODENT in a 1 minute one-sided contest.
WRAITH won victory over TURQ in a 1 minute contest.
ACCUSER was overpowered by CHRIS MATTHEWS in a 1 minute one-sided match.
BLITZWING overpowered BULL LONEY in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
ASTROTRAIN outlasted DYLAN RATIGAN in a dull 25 minute brawl.
JOEY devastated CAPTAIN PEACHFUZZ in a 2 minute mismatched match.
MASTER DARQUE savagely defeated BIKINI ATOLL in a action packed 2 minute bloody match.
SHADOW OF A SEASON was subdued by LEGION in a 1 minute fight.
CHRIS HAYES overpowered JEZEBEL in a 2 minute uneven duel.
VOLUND demolished HIRO in a 1 minute uneven conflict.
MIGHTY MANFRED was subdued by AVER in a 1 minute duel.
GRIMHILD was savagely defeated by KIKI in a crowd pleasing 4 minute brutal bout.
MY LAST TWENTY handily defeated CONVICTED THIEF in a 1 minute uneven conflict.
SITKA SERENITY subdued MAXHEME in a 3 minute amateur's bout.
JAMICE was savagely defeated by STING in a exciting 8 minute gory novice's struggle.
FLOWER POWER was handily defeated by FRENCH FRY PIE in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
ENCORE DEBOUT handily defeated JUDAS in a 1 minute mismatched match.
ADEO MORI SERVUS luckily beat SKY PILOT in a 3 minute novice's match.
MIGHTY MANFRED was outwaited by SCALES in a crowd boring 12 minute novice's duel.
PARA handily defeated THE DISCIPLE in a 1 minute uneven match.
LONELY TRUCHER beat DEEJAY SPINNER in a 4 minute novice's competition.
M. CHARDONNAY bested MAXIMILLIAN in a popular 3 minute novice's battle.
DUNGEON PORTER overpowered RANDOM HERO in a 3 minute uneven competition.
THE SAGE WARD overpowered OLD N BITTER in a 2 minute one-sided bout.
THE AGED MONK overpowered WRECKLESS in a 1 minute uneven battle.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|AIMED BLOW                      29         PARRY-LUNGE       21 -  16 -  1      57  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     28         TOTAL PARRY       81 -  65 -  2      55  |
|STRIKING ATTACK                 25         PARRY-STRIKE      18 -  15 -  3      55  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                  24         STRIKING ATTACK  105 - 100 - 12      51  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                 21         LUNGING ATTACK    90 - 104 -  5      46  |
|WALL OF STEEL                   16         WALL OF STEEL     49 -  58 -  3      46  |
|BASHING ATTACK                  15         BASHING ATTACK    47 -  56 -  0      46  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    8         AIMED BLOW        74 -  99 -  2      43  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     6         SLASHING ATTACK   50 -  77 -  4      39  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      5         PARRY-RIPOSTE     19 -  34 -  1      36  |

Turn 321 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-STRIKE       4 -  2     AIMED BLOW        12 - 17         3  AIMED BLOW     
BASHING ATTACK    10 -  5     PARRY-LUNGE        2 -  3         3  STRIKING ATTACK
WALL OF STEEL      9 -  7     SLASHING ATTACK    8 - 13         2  LUNGING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK    13 - 11     PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  6         1  WALL OF STEEL  
STRIKING ATTACK   13 - 12                                       1  SLASHING ATTACK
TOTAL PARRY       14 - 14                                       1  BASHING ATTACK 

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
AIMED BLOW       BIG MAC 7120               17   7  0  123 FAST FOOD (724)
LUNGING ATTACK   WILHELM SCREAM 7162        15   5  0  121 OTTODROME TW (728)
STRIKING ATTACK  SLUGBAIT 6329              10   1  1  105 I HATE THEM (597)
WALL OF STEEL    TALKEETNA 7047             20  15  0  102 ALASKAN PIPELINE (714)
BASHING ATTACK   LATKA 6940                 14   6  1   95 SECOND BANANAS (573)
PARRY-LUNGE      DRAGO KAZOV 7100           15  13  1   89 OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)
SLASHING ATTACK  PETIT JARDINIA 7154        12   5  0   82 LES TURFISTES (727)
TOTAL PARRY      ULTIMA REGUM 7076          18  12  0   75 IN QETERNUM (718)
PARRY-STRIKE     KHAN 7503                   7   6  1   43 OBSIDIAN ORDER (715)
PARRY-RIPOSTE    ICE WIND 7758               3   1  0   36 BASH BROS PARK (766)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is NORM 6227.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
STING 7656.  The ten other most popular fighters were OH BOY 7746, DUMBO 7791, 
CHICKEN A LA KING 7583, NORM 6227, DILECTONON FERIO 7483, ARCHER 7216, YORL 7153, 
RACHAEL MADDOW 7632, HAM BURGLAR 7698, and GAUTREK 7666.

The least popular fighter this week was DYLAN RATIGAN 7634.  The other ten least 
popular fighters were ASTROTRAIN 7352, SCALES 7833, MIGHTY MANFRED 7771, ZEKE 7584, 
JAMICE 7798, WRECKLESS 7860, OLD N BITTER 7851, RANDOM HERO 7859, DUNGEON PORTER 
7837, and LONELY TRUCHER 7724.

The following warriors will travel to AD after next turn:

BIG MAC (47-7120) FAST FOOD (724)

The following warriors have traveled to AD after fighting this turn:

QUEEN OF TARTS (47-5980) MYSTIC ORC FEAST (416)
BROOMSTICK (47-7057) LAND OF OZ (217)