DUEL 2 NEWSLETTER Date : 12/05/2006 Duedate: 01/01/2007 FLORAL VALLEY ARENA DM-52 TURN-225 This Weeks Top Honors THE DUELMASTER IS INSOLENT IRIS FLOWER GIRLS (189) (52-3323) [27-9-0,152] Chartered Recognition Leader Unchartered Recognition Leader INSOLENT IRIS POSITION IS EMPTY FLOWER GIRLS (189) (52-3323) [27-9-0,152] Popularity Leader This Weeks Favorite PANDEMIC PANDEMIC DARK RAIDERS (78) DARK RAIDERS (78) (52-3319) [13-23-0,103] (52-3319) [13-23-0,103] THE CURRENT TOP TEAM BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) TEAMS ON THE MOVE TOP CAREER HONORS Team Name Point Gain Chartered Team 1. SITTEES (359) 60 2. ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) 38 FLOWER GIRLS (189) 3. BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) 24 Unchartered Team 4. ASSASSIN NATION (186) 20 5. BRONZE KNIGHTS (362) 11 OCCULTIC PRAYER (158) The Top Teams Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 1- 1 WATCH OUT! (391) 34 12 1 73.9 1/ 5 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) 10 5 0 2/ 2 FLOWER GIRLS (189) 432 263 11 62.2 2/ 3 FLOWER GIRLS (189) 9 5 0 3/ 3 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) 60 41 3 59.4 3/ 6 ASSASSIN NATION (186) 8 6 0 4- 4 HOPLITES (376) 37 27 2 57.8 4/ 7 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) 7 5 0 5- 5 SILVER KNIGHTS (361) 54 43 5 55.7 5- 4 ODIN'S CHOSEN (368) 6 4 1 6/11 SITTEES (359) 28 26 2 51.9 6/11 OTTO'S PARTS (150) 6 8 0 7/ 6 BRONZE KNIGHTS (362) 34 32 6 51.5 7/ 2 BRONZE KNIGHTS (362) 5 6 2 8/ 7 OTTO'S PARTS (150) 272 258 13 51.3 8/13 SITTEES (359) 4 1 1 9- 8 ODIN'S CHOSEN (368) 48 46 6 51.1 9- 1 SILVER KNIGHTS (361) 4 4 1 10- 9*SELECTED ECLECTIC (388) 10 10 2 50.0 10- 8*SELECTED ECLECTIC (388) 4 6 0 11-10*CHAOS KNIGHTS (390) 5 5 1 50.0 11-12 HOPLITES (376) 3 6 1 12/12 ASSASSIN NATION (186) 184 196 28 48.4 12/10 DARK RAIDERS (78) 3 8 1 13/13 DARK RAIDERS (78) 166 194 9 46.1 13- 9*CHAOS KNIGHTS (390) 2 3 0 14/14 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) 29 38 3 43.3 14/15 DARK DRAGONS (378) 2 5 0 15-15*BLACK KNIGHTS 2 (363) 15 20 0 42.9 15-16*BLACK KNIGHTS 2 (363) 1 4 0 16/16 DARK DRAGONS (378) 18 39 2 31.6 16-18*DRAGON CLONE (383) 0 5 0 Career Win-Loss Record W L K % Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns W L K 17-19*DRAGON CLONE (383) 1 9 1 10.0 17-19 WATCH OUT! (391) 0 1 0 '*' Unchartered team '-' Team did not fight this turn (###) Avoid teams by their Team Id ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank DUELMASTER'S COLUMN Notes from the arena champ. Well, I'm here again! I just love this profession. What more could a gladiatrix want? I get to be on top pretty much any time I want. I get to handle all the tools and weapons I want. I can yell and scream and everyone accepts it and, indeed, thinks it must be wonderful. And they pay me for this? So what does everyone think of the "new name" to our arena? Lady Fern only had the requirement that it had to have something to do with our team name. All us girls gathered around and discussed names and voted on Floral Valley. I thought up the name "valley". I wonder WHAT I was referring to? We had a good time deciding on the name. We did a little partying and had some gladiating of our own, if you know what I mean. (wink) Just wait until you see some of the new DA "Monsters" names. Oh, yeah! Well, shucks. I see I still have some openings on my dance card at The Flower Shoppe this week. Sign up for the fun before you miss out completely. You'll really, really be glad you did. Oooooooohhhhhhhh! Insolent Iris SPY REPORT Good day, friends and fiends, welcome to your friendly neighborhood spyreport. I doubt FLORAL VALLEY will ever be the same. It seems the training can make the difference, as SILVER KNIGHTS is pushed out of top team by BLOOD AND GUTS!, who came from 5th with a 3-2-0 this turn. Now keep the taverns open late tonight, for there are sorrows to drown for SILVER KNIGHTS, whose 0-0-0 this turn dropped them by 8 into 9th. OTTO'S PARTS stable has parlayed this turn's 2-2-0 into a 5 space move up the rankings. This brings them up to 6th place. Good work, guys! The SITTEES guild has had a 4-1-1 turn and deserves to be watched in the future. You never know where this kind of thing can lead. And let's see, BYRON fought SMOTHERING SALVIA and gained 20 points and contributed to SITTEES' 4-1-1. AYDINDRIL has lost to LORD JON SNOW, falling 13 points, while helping make DARK DRAGONS a 1-3-0 turn. This week's Duelmaster bout was between PANDEMIC and our Duelmaster INSOLENT IRIS, making a challenge. The attempts to dethrone the Duelmaster have failed, and INSOLENT IRIS remains FLORAL VALLEY's top warrior for another turn. Can someone confirm a rumor for me? I hear the top team makes their losing fighters do dishes at The Victory Tavern until they win. Maybe? He who challenges well, fights well. He who avoids without cause, shall lose for good reasons. My mama told me that one. I also notice that the DARK RAIDERS stable was the most avoided team this turn. Come on FLORAL VALLEY, what are you afraid of? And guess who avoided DARK RAIDERS stable the most? Believe it or not, it was BLOOD AND GUTS!. Anyone surprised? Well, sports fans, take notice that MALICE from DARK RAIDERS was FLORAL VALLEY's most challenged warrior this turn. In a brave attempt, BUSHSUCKSTOADIE from ISN'T IT OBVIOUS challenged up 24 points to fight BRAIN TUMOUR from the OTTO'S PARTS stable. BUSHSUCKSTOADIE perhaps got his just desserts, seeing as he overcame BRAIN TUMOUR and ended up with 90 recognition points. We only live a short time in this world, so why not take a sharp blade, and shave it close? BRONZE KNIGHTS has lost SER STEEL to the arena in the sky, but they don't seem to be worried. What do you expect from 8-6-2? The manager of FLOWER GIRLS will not be pleased to learn that SMOTHERING SALVIA, a 4-2-1 fighter, has been killed at the hands of SITTEES' BYRON. Anyone care to tell me why the warriors of ISN'T IT OBVIOUS haven't revenged the death of WHOSYOURDADDY against SER ILYN PAYNE of SILVER KNIGHTS yet? Hmmm? We'd like to remind certain teams not to rob the graves of their enemies. You know who you are; and it's considered rude. Thought for the day, a new sword shines bright, but the notched sword sings the sweetest. Always good to rest in FLORAL VALLEY, but never good to wear out my welcome. Look for me in future turns. Until the sun next rises and my pen sets to paper-- Alarond the Scribe DUELMASTER W L K POINTS TEAM NAME INSOLENT IRIS 3323 27 9 0 152 FLOWER GIRLS (189) CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME IGOR MALMORT 3594 12 8 1 130 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) SEVERITY 3538 18 11 3 104 ASSASSIN NATION (186) PANDEMIC 3319 13 23 0 103 DARK RAIDERS (78) BOB LE CANADIEN 3632 15 4 0 102 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) -GUTHHILD MIDWALL 3611 12 7 2 95 ODIN'S CHOSEN (368) MAYHEM 3537 17 12 2 94 ASSASSIN NATION (186) MALICE 3343 17 11 1 91 DARK RAIDERS (78) TONNELLE 3634 15 4 1 91 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) CHAMPIONS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME PSYCHOSIS 3651 13 6 3 90 DARK RAIDERS (78) BUSHSUCKSTOADIE 3757 8 3 3 90 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) BRAIN TUMOUR 3502 17 8 0 83 OTTO'S PARTS (150) PAS DE QUARTIER 3633 10 9 1 80 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) PULLED HAMSTRING 3554 9 13 0 79 OTTO'S PARTS (150) -PHOBOPHOBIA 3840 8 1 0 78 WATCH OUT! (391) -ARMED RESPONSE 3683 8 5 0 74 HOPLITES (376) -SER ILYN PAYNE 3573 10 10 2 71 SILVER KNIGHTS (361) -SARMASSOPHOBIA 3839 7 3 1 67 WATCH OUT! (391) CHALLENGER ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -KYKENSTIENBURG 3613 13 6 2 65 ODIN'S CHOSEN (368) -SINISTROPHOBIA 3835 10 3 0 65 WATCH OUT! (391) -NOVERCAPHOBIA 3837 5 1 0 63 WATCH OUT! (391) LORD JON SNOW 3580 8 6 2 61 BRONZE KNIGHTS (362) PAINFUL PEONY 3744 8 2 0 58 FLOWER GIRLS (189) SHY ANN 3562 6 4 1 58 SITTEES (359) -SER GALAD 3714 9 3 0 57 SILVER KNIGHTS (361) ADEPTS W L K POINTS TEAM NAME BYRON 3559 9 5 1 56 SITTEES (359) IMTOOSEXY 3759 7 5 0 53 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) -SOUL NOVA 3685 8 5 1 51 HOPLITES (376) SER LORAS TYRELL 3582 7 7 1 50 BRONZE KNIGHTS (362) -SER VON DARKMOOR 3697 8 5 1 48 SILVER KNIGHTS (361) ATHLETE'S FOOT 3678 10 7 1 44 OTTO'S PARTS (150) AYDINDRIL 3704 6 7 1 42 DARK DRAGONS (378) -MELOPHOBIA 3836 4 3 0 42 WATCH OUT! (391) -LORD DAVOS 3577 11 8 0 41 SILVER KNIGHTS (361) -SER JAIME 3578 6 6 0 36 BRONZE KNIGHTS (362) FAT LIP 3791 3 3 0 35 OTTO'S PARTS (150) CHALLENGER INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -FYLGJA 3746 5 3 0 33 ODIN'S CHOSEN (368) SUE SOON 3572 4 3 0 33 SITTEES (359) SLAYINGDEISFUN 3818 3 3 0 32 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) OAK LEE 3563 6 8 0 31 SITTEES (359) -LUMINOUS ANGEL 3684 8 5 0 29 HOPLITES (376) -OPAL AVENGER 3686 7 6 0 29 HOPLITES (376) DECEASE 3848 2 0 0 29 ASSASSIN NATION (186) -SER ALAIN STRONHAND 3747 4 3 2 28 SILVER KNIGHTS (361) -SER ALLOCES 3584 4 3 0 26 BLACK KNIGHTS 2 (363) TEMPEST 3770 4 4 0 25 ASSASSIN NATION (186) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -SER AERYS OAKHEART 3742 3 4 0 24 BRONZE KNIGHTS (362) INITIATES W L K POINTS TEAM NAME -SER FURCAS 3583 5 2 0 22 BLACK KNIGHTS 2 (363) -BARON SOUL 3831 2 0 0 21 CHAOS KNIGHTS (390) BOY Z 3739 1 0 0 19 SITTEES (359) -TUD 3813 2 2 0 18 SELECTED ECLECTIC (388) ISHARA 3732 3 6 1 16 DARK DRAGONS (378) -BETA 3812 3 1 0 15 SELECTED ECLECTIC (388) -SNORT 3814 2 2 2 15 SELECTED ECLECTIC (388) -ZHONE 3815 2 2 0 14 SELECTED ECLECTIC (388) -DARK ENEMY 3842 1 1 1 12 ODIN'S CHOSEN (368) ANXIOUS AZALEA 3825 3 2 0 11 FLOWER GIRLS (189) AETHEL 3828 1 1 0 11 DARK DRAGONS (378) -SER BLACKBALL 3755 2 3 0 9 BLACK KNIGHTS 2 (363) SIZZLING SUNFLOWER 3846 1 0 0 9 FLOWER GIRLS (189) -LORD LONELY 3793 2 2 0 8 BLACK KNIGHTS 2 (363) -REQUIEM 3829 1 1 0 6 CHAOS KNIGHTS (390) -RATSO 3816 1 3 0 6 SELECTED ECLECTIC (388) -KRAZYBLADZ 3833 1 1 1 5 CHAOS KNIGHTS (390) -MALEVOLENCE 3830 1 1 0 4 CHAOS KNIGHTS (390) -GHABS WHINE 3841 1 1 0 4 ODIN'S CHOSEN (368) DISHONOR 3843 0 2 0 4 ASSASSIN NATION (186) -VESERUETHEDE 3824 0 3 0 3 BLACK KNIGHTS 2 (363) -EPITAPH 3832 0 2 0 2 CHAOS KNIGHTS (390) OREN 3844 0 1 0 1 DARK DRAGONS (378) THEDEONITSKNEES 3854 0 1 0 1 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) '-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn. THE DEAD W L K TEAM NAME SLAIN BY TURN Revenge? REROLL 3856 0 1 0 BLOOD AND GUTS! 365 PRINCE OF LOVE 25 225 NONE AUBIN L'AUROUGE 3596 8 11 0 BLOOD AND GUTS! 365 SER ILYN PAYNE 3573 223 REVENGED SER STEEL 3579 8 6 2 BRONZE KNIGHTS 362 PSYCHOSIS 3651 225 DAISHAR 3752 1 3 0 DARK DRAGONS 378 SER ALAIN STRONH 3747 222 SMOTHERING SALVI 3776 4 3 1 FLOWER GIRLS 189 BYRON 3559 225 ABSOLUTE GRACE 3687 6 4 1 HOPLITES 376 PAS DE QUARTIER 3633 221 NOT REVE LETSDAHEATHEN 3855 0 1 0 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS 382 SPYMASTER 22 225 NONE WHOSYOURDADDY 3760 7 3 0 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS 382 SER ILYN PAYNE 3573 222 THEDEBOWTOVC 3762 4 7 0 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS 382 LORD JON SNOW 3580 223 SLIPPED DISK 3730 8 3 0 OTTO'S PARTS 150 SER STEEL 3579 224 PERSONAL ADS Pandemic -- That was fun. I like the top position. Thanks for helping me finish that way, Hon. (wink) -- Insolent Iris Zhone -- I like your type that can go and go and go. Wasn't that fun? Come on over to The Flower Shoppe and visit me and we will do it again. Anything you want! Oh, yeah. -- Anxious Azalea Lord Jon -- Yes, I was lucky. But I have an idea. Do you think it would help if we did it in the snow? (giggle) -- Painful Peony Imtoosexy -- You are not! But you finished first! -- Smothering Salvia Odin's Chosen -- Did you mean anything specific when you named one of your top warriors Ghab's Whine? We kinda had to chuckle at that. More importantly, we want a taste! -- The Flower Girls Slipped Disc -- We were sad to see you go. May you fight and flirt well in That Great Arena In The Sky. -- The Flower Girls We trust everyone did well in The Mailer. My gals had their usual mediocre-at-best results, but they did do a lot of tricks. (wink) -- Lady Fern Toker -- Received your fine diplo last round. Thank you for the follow up. This type of diplo and summary enhanced your organizational and execution abilities in my eyes. Thank you for having done a terrific job. -- Lady Fern All -- What Toker did (this needs to be broadcast as a terrific method for bring closure to an event) is: Congratulate us Advise us specifically of what we had won Tell us what was done to make sure we rec'd our prizes Remind us of the winnings Thank us for the support of the event. It certainly made us "want" to participate in any event run in such a manner. -- Lady Fern, The Flower Girls, The Consortium Elders Heathen -- Funny you should question my skills, considering your considerably low win ratio versus my squad. I've obviously made an impression, since you've named a warrior after me. For the record, I'm not currently a member of any alliance. I just like stepping on things that squeak! -- Ghab/Assassin Nation Guthhild Midwall -- This is fun! Feels a little bit like "Whack-a-Mole." Every time you or one of your teammates pops up I whack you on the head and send you down again. Wheeeeee.... -- Mayhem (Severity agrees) Toker -- Somehow, I missed your impressive 5-0-3 turn. That matches the best I have ever generated in kills in one turn (and that was at 4-1-3). Kudos! -- Ghab/Assassin Nation Anxious Azalea -- Sorry to put a stain on your record. Now, the stain on your dress on the other hand.... -- Tempest As is my right for 5th place -- Spy Master is renamed "Ghab's Bidding." -- Ghab/ Assassin Nation DK Toker -- Rumor has it the VC has fallen? What a shame. I was just beginning to enjoy this war! I guess there's always the Turf War huh? That should be fun! -- DK Heathen Kat -- Disregard last turn's p-ad--I guess events have a way of explaining themselves. I hope you'll stick around here in the fine city of ---- for a while. -- DK Heathen Lady Fern -- Quite interesting actually. Awaiting the new name--should be something else interesting! -- DK Heathen TUD -- Well thank you. It seems I've found what I was looking for! Not bad either. -- Fylgja Mayhem -- Before all is said and done I will devastate you--mark my words! -- Guthhild P.S. You too, Iris. Lady Fern -- I'm glad you enjoyed. Again, congrats on the title. You and your girls put in a lot of work to earn it! (wink) -- D.K. Toker Merciless Mum -- That was a surprise! Wish you all the best in the afterlife. -- Ser Galad Le Pentarque -- My apologies on Aubin. It was not intentional. We salute his memory and Ser Ilyn stands ready for your B.F.! -- D.K. Toker D.K. Heathen -- As always after a 5-0 I go under .500%! Thank the deities that I wasn't cursed like this in Mordant for the Olympiad or the D.E. wouldn't be in third on the last turn of the contest. -- Dark Knight Toker P.S. Snail enroute. D.K. Goat -- No more VC to pick on, brother. What do we do now? (evil grin) -- Dark Knight Toker D.K. Blackstorm -- I doubt you'll be here now that the VC no longer exit. So if that is the case, I'll see you in Arkers, buddy! -- D.K. Toker Max -- Sounds good! You are the one with the over-inflated ego. You or your ex- alliancemates have never shown me anything to fear. That was a Random Match, was it not? We shall see! Just because the collapse of the VC was yesterday's news, doesn't mean I won't still punish you today! (grin) -- D.K. Toker All -- Again I want to thank everyone for participating in the "Quest." Be ready for the "Quest 2" that should start on T-228! I will have the rules and prizes listed a couple of months prior to its running. -- Toker Requiem -- Thought I had you, but what can I say. I need to throttle back a little in order to win. Thanks for the skills. -- Dishonor Malevolence -- I love the name! Good fight and thanks for all the skills.... -- Decease Did you notice this cool Napoleon guy in the DA? -- Le Pentarque I was flattered to be used in your spotlight, Armed Response. Good luck against warriors from other teams.... -- Pas de Quartier Lord Jon Snow -- Nice kill for you; keep looking over your shoulder, bud! -- Maximillian Silver Knights -- Must be Karma eh?! An eye for an eye. It was bound to come around someday. -- Maximillian Epitaph -- You just about had your epitaph read, eh! -- Slayingdeisfun Kykenstienburg -- You're supposed to raise your weapon you know. I hit you with every shot; your style belies you. -- Bushsuckstoadie Smothering Salvia -- I was trying to impress you with my fancy footwork; did it work? -- I'mtoosexy Goat -- Diplo received, will reply after I read your spot. -- Maximillian Toker -- Good of you to show-up in my home arena. Let's see what your guys are made of now. -- Maximillian 10 November 2006 The Quest of the Best has come to an end. Dark Knight Toker, host of the Quest, wants to proclaim the Ultimate Victor and give a listing of prize winners. Lady Fern and her Flower Girls of the Consortium are the Ultimate Victors of the Quest. Well fought and there's nothing like coming from behind to leave us all in the dust. Can't wait to see you defend your title! (wink) Here is a complete list of managers who placed in prize positions: 1) Lady Fern, mgr. Flower Girls 2) Le Pentarque, mgr. Blood & Guts! 3) Crip, mgr. Otto's Parts 4) D.K. Heathen Hatebred, mgr. Odin's Chosen 5) Ghab, mgr. Assassin Nation 6) Fanthayne, mgr. Dark Raiders 7) D.K. Toker, mgr. Silver Knights 8) D.K. Wasby, mgr. Bronze Knights 9) The Expatriate, mgr. Bleak Legion 10) Still the Distilled, mgr. Springborne Fair Thanks to all that had the gall to show up, but I really want to thank the managers that had the mettle to survive and not run when they started getting their butt handed to them. Respect to All. Quest #1 host, Dark Knight Toker 14 November 2006 A Tale of Fusion Confusion Delusion Revolution as told by Hammer the WordSmith SomeWhere Beyond ElseWhere and ElseWhen a hooded figure brooded upon the lingering wisps of memory from days gone by. From the howling sands to the sanding howls the streams of thought bubbled and flowed, winding endlessly entwined within the darkest recesses and lightest resources of the learned and unlearned disciplines of managerial mayhem and manipulation. Nameless faces and faceless names floated in the swirling mists of madness embalmed within the memories of one who knew he did not know how far reaching the influences [both positive and negative] had rooted and flowered in the march of time and energy expended in the historical markings of gladiatorial essence and excellence experience. The tamed and the untamed coupled with the named and the unnamed resources that spilt their sweat and blood on the sands of arenas both known and unknown had metamorphosed into the dreamings and the schemings of the fadings of jadings and paradings [in both public and private] amongst the elite and the indiscreet posturings and babblings of managers becoming legends in their own minds and times. Hammer pondered upon beginnings and the seemingly endless myriad of endings possibly possible among the interspersed and intertwined impossible possibilities presently past and future. Echoing and reechoing in the vast depths and countless compartments along the corridors of his mind, Hammer played and replayed the glories shared and dared in the sixty-plus stabled arena on fabled Noblish Island DM 93. The training had been all too brief, but the competition generated by the multi faceted personages inhabiting DM 93 and the sheer multitude of numbers had forever instilled themselves in the heart and soul of the veteran manager [Hammer]; insomuch that the migration to Niatoli Island DM 33 triggered the desire to emulate the glory and the grandeur of the spectacle of stables vying for recognition from among the virtually numberless no-name newbies making names for themselves as they numbered their stables and accomplishments for all to see and behold, to the song and the sound of the sight of clashing cold cruel steel simmering the flesh of gallant gladiators consumed by the gory and the glory of crossing blades with the superior and the inferior within the interior of Greywand's Global Gladiatorial Galaxy. Far far ago and long long away had many abandoned hope for a return to the reminiscences revered by so many managers; predating even the generations of gladiators graduating from Noblish Island and the years of yore and gore and gallantry before. Rumblings and mumblings of a renovation rejuvenating the reflexes of managers numbed by the numberless trysts of tourney tarnished stables began revolutionizing the very fabric of time and space and time-honored tradition throughout the ranks of visionary newbies and volatile veterans alike and dislike. History was being shaken to the core of the gore as glory and grandeur responded to the revelry reverie revelations and reveille revolutionizing the creation of a new arena in the making; populated by No-Tourney Warriors and Full Stable Participants pledging to forge a new vision version of "The Fiercest and Best" for crossing blades and crosser banter in the personal ads and team spotlight tomes. Now was the time for Hammer to emerge and once again merge his talent among the gifted and grifted; answering the call to assemble the drifted [and to directly divulge and converge with the dozens] for the destiny of destructive denizens determined to build a new legacy upon the all-but-forgotten ashes of the old and olden legends of times lost. [TIME JUMP] Hammer sifted the sands in the dead of night in the desert reaches [located SomeWhere BeYond ElseWhere and ElseWhen] to discover 5 gladiators not tourney worthy, yet interesting enough to begin their careers in a No-Tourney Arena! "They need not be dispatched to the Dark Arena," the veteran manager mused as he sorted through paperwork long discarded and vaguely forgotten, "because there is nothing like a good Blood Feud to provide inspiration for writing personal ads in the arena newsletter! Besides, there are times when the replacement for a warrior wounded mortally on the arena sands fares much better than the one exchanged from Torch Light!" Fights by Torch Light were certainly deemed unnecessary as Hammer had already deduced that a number of determined stables would undoubtedly congregate with High Octane Warriors under the guidance of Higher Octane Managers to populate and depopulate the new No-Tourney Arena currently under construction in DM 81. Fortunately his feeble foray into the desert would yield somewhat suitable candidates for the newfound purposes Hammer had in mind. From among the candidates to be found Hammer would be rewarded in time by BLOODFEUDS and REPLACEMENT WARRIORS aplenty! Deep into the night Hammer searched and searched until five not-so-promising stables were uncovered in the waning hours before dawn. Ripper discards were scattered far and wide, but this was not the time or the hour to let sentimental views cloud the issue at hand. Future events would lend themselves to a suitable Ripper replacement, especially with the prospects Hammer was now sorting for his selection decision to dispatch to the Gladiatorial Commission for processing. Most managers have the luxury of selecting the best group [or discarding the worst group!] Hammer had the novelty of rounding up the castaways from the New Stables paperwork accumulated long ago from Maximillian's Morya Madness contest in DM 28 that were deemed below inferior as contest prizes [and thus banished from sight!] Hammer scrutinized and agonized over which group of gladiators were worth the sacks of gold coins he was prepared to release to the Gladiatorial Commission for fees to MAINTENANCE his new stable in the No-Tourney Arena. After what seemed like long hours passing by, Hammer discarded one and then another group of hopefuls. After lengthy debate a third was cast aside. Deciding between the final two groups found Hammer going back to interview the rejected candidates time and time again [until a final decision was made that Hammer could live with and his new stable could die with!] before the final quirks were hammered out and pen put to paper to process the prospective puny stable with the Gladiatorial Commission. The only solace gained from the painful process was the knowledge that other managers would be less tempted to run stables in DM 81 populated by their tourney- worthy warriors [under the penalty of death imposed and enforced upon tourney experienced gladiators by the Committee being formed to police and regulate such matters!] as sworn to and signed in good faith by each registering manager. [TIME JUMP] Hammer had worked long and hard to find suitable candidates for his stable and now it was time to begin their training. The paperwork had been dispatched for registration with the Gladiatorial Commission and now was the hour in which preparation was paramount! Dispatch riders had arrived with the news that Considerable Bounty was being offered as incentive rewards to those managers sending new stables to the No-Tourney Arena. Hammer realized this would Up the Ante [causing greater pause in the managerial community for selecting suitable stables!] as the creative competition was certain to escalate and produce Serious Sword Slinging Stables Staining the Arena Sands Red! Obviously a serious upgrade in the quality of competition migrating to the No- Tourney Arena in DM 81 would definitely work in favor of Hammer; enormously increasing the death toll percentage potential amongst the ranks of his new start-up stable in DM 81 [Sands Running Red and Blood Feuds Running Rampant as Undoubtedly Expected!] Hammer observed the futility of his new warriors training [as well as they could for what they were made from!] while recent memories came to the forefront of his mind! When the paperwork was nearly completed and names were selected for each Gladiator, Hammer decided to name the stable according to what he had discovered in the darkness while searching during the dismal hours of the desert night. These warriors would probably be more well suited to fight by Torch Light had they fallen into the possession of most other managers! Paper Warriors better suited to confronting Dark Arena Monsters [rather than being fed to the Gladiatorial Lions certain to be populating the regular No-Tourney Arena!] Specimens blatantly better suited for feeding upon agitated armadillo ants than for striving to attain recognition and fame in the No-Tourney Arena [or any arena!] Thus was AARDVARK HAMMERZ birthed and born for Greatness or Disgrace! [TIME JUMP] Dispatch riders on winged steeds brought the news Hammer had been awaiting! Not since the days of training on Noblish Island in DM 93 had Hammer encountered such collective enthusiasm for crossing blades in a selected arena such as DM 81 [recalling the time Hammer generated a gathering of newbies to transfer to Niatoli Island in DM 33 to match wits and cross blades with the assembling veterans upon graduation!] The Consortium had represented the veterans well in DM 33 with the SWEETNESS stable managed by Sweety Pie. Now the good news had arrived that The Consortium was seen registering a stable named LIFE IMPACTS in the No-Tourney Arena! Former alliance mates Darque and Kat had reportedly registered DARQUE AGES and KATHOUSE with the Gladiatorial Commission. Morya Madness combatant LePentarque from DM 28 had registered LA PENTARCHIE and longtime fixture Drake in North Fork DM 47 [recently returned from a lengthy hiatus] had been lured by the competition to register DRAKE'S HARDWARE. Deke [at the helm of DOC LEGRAND'S LAB] was instrumental in promoting the No- Tourney Arena by repeatedly negotiating terms with the Gladiatorial Commission. Others had laid the groundwork before him, but Deke raised the banner and carried it the final distance [Supported by Countless Managers too numerous to mention!] Salute Yourselves for Your Efforts are Most Graciously Applauded throughout Alastari! Apex had signed in with CAROLINA BLUE as had Ghab with ASSASSIN NATION. Another familiar name was found on the rolls as DeGotti registered CULT OF BACCHUS followed by DOOM KNIGHTS managed by Blackstorm. Also on the rolls to be noted were AS SEEN ON TV II managed by Indimar and RAGNAROK'S WOLVES by none other than ragnorokwolf. Nomad had signed on with PHANTOM REGIMENT and Silas followed suit with GRIFFONRAWL MMA. Another notable signature was that of MasterBeru with CHILDHOOD HEROES and a penchant for scribing Team Spotlights [A Plus in Any Arena!] Detective Kellumbo had followed the clues and was observed enroute to registering a yet unannounced stable [such are the ways of sleuthhounds and such!] Rumor had it that the manager known as Roadkill was on his way to register a stable after his namesake and Slugbait was close behind [obliviously lost in thought!] Finally [in no particular disorder!] managers Grimm, Woody, Terminator, Den and Bill were also seen elbowing their way through the gathering registration crowd to officially announce their participation in the No-Tourney Arena. COUNTLESS OTHER MANAGERS were known to be pondering the consequences of sending stables to a No-Tourney Arena and had yet to make the commitment public knowledge as to their intentions. Howbeit the Gladiatorial Commission was reportedly swamped with requests for New Stable Registration Forms [whether for the Tempe Facer or No-Tourney Arena was anybody's guess at the present time!] Judging from the furtive figures darting and ducking in the shadows and alleyways throughout Alastari [as well as those huddled in taverns or communicating with one another by various means available!] the success of such a No-Tourney Arena was Ballooning far Beyond the Expectations of the Promoters and Petitioners Bar None! HAMMER WAS UNDERSTANDABLY ENTHUSED BEYOND MEASURE BECAUSE the No-Tourney Arena had the Best Potential for attracting and assembling a congregation of competitors rivaling the numbers of Noblish Island from days gone by! JANUARY 2007 MARKS THE BEGINNING of a Journey where both Newbies and Veterans join together in a Historic Assemblage Celebrating the Crossing of Blades between some of the Best Managed Stables in all of Alastari [Known and Unknown!] "May Your Blades Be Sharp and Your Wits Sharper" Hammer Minister of War 30 November 2006 NEED A TURF WAR ALLIANCE?? Master Beru, Wretch, Reaper, and Xoan have come together to form an Alliance for the TURF WAR in DM47 with no regards for experience in competitions or even the game. If you want to enjoy the thrills of the competition, we have space for up to three more managers. Contact Master Beru at email@example.com for more information or send a note to Master Beru at DM 29--Army of Darkness. If you are interested, we need to move quickly, since the contest starts in January and there are a few requirements to meet to participate. May your blades find the chinks in your enemy's armor. -- Master Beru LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS REROLL was butchered by PRINCE OF LOVE in a 1 minute bloody Dark Arena fight. LETSDAHEATHEN was slaughtered by SPYMASTER in a 1 minute Dark Arena battle. INSOLENT IRIS unbelievably bested PANDEMIC in a 3 minute Challenge Title match. IGOR MALMORT devastated MALICE in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge fight. BUSHSUCKSTOADIE demolished BRAIN TUMOUR in a 1 minute Challenge competition. PAINFUL PEONY won victory over SER LORAS TYRELL in a 3 minute Challenge fight. SLAYINGDEISFUN devastated ANXIOUS AZALEA in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match. MAYHEM was unbelievably bested by BOB LE CANADIEN in a 4 minute expert's fight. SEVERITY vanquished PAS DE QUARTIER in a 1 minute one-sided duel. PSYCHOSIS unbelievably slew SER STEEL in a popular 1 minute duel. PULLED HAMSTRING overpowered IMTOOSEXY in a 1 minute uneven match. TONNELLE beat KUNG-FU MASTER in a exciting 1 minute fight. BYRON murdered SMOTHERING SALVIA in a 1 minute mismatched competition. SHY ANN devastated TEMPEST in a 1 minute one-sided battle. LORD JON SNOW devastated AYDINDRIL in a 1 minute mismatched bout. FAT LIP was overcome by RUTHLESS JAYWALKER in a action packed 1 minute fight. ATHLETE'S FOOT overpowered SUE SOON in a 1 minute uneven struggle. OAK LEE handily defeated ISHARA in a 1 minute mismatched bout. AETHEL devastated THEDEONITSKNEES in a 1 minute one-sided brawl. DISHONOR was beaten by SIZZLING SUNFLOWER in a 2 minute novice's match. DECEASE overpowered TRUSTWORTHY SCRIBE in a 1 minute one-sided match. BOY Z overcame OREN in a crowd pleasing 1 minute competition. BATTLE REPORT MOST POPULAR RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS |FIGHTING STYLE FIGHTS FIGHTING STYLE W - L - K PERCENT| |LUNGING ATTACK 9 PARRY-RIPOSTE 12 - 8 - 1 60 | |AIMED BLOW 7 TOTAL PARRY 43 - 30 - 2 59 | |SLASHING ATTACK 6 AIMED BLOW 39 - 28 - 3 58 | |WALL OF STEEL 5 STRIKING ATTACK 50 - 48 - 5 51 | |STRIKING ATTACK 4 WALL OF STEEL 50 - 52 - 4 49 | |BASHING ATTACK 4 PARRY-STRIKE 13 - 14 - 0 48 | |TOTAL PARRY 3 SLASHING ATTACK 30 - 34 - 2 47 | |PARRY-LUNGE 1 BASHING ATTACK 35 - 40 - 4 47 | |PARRY-STRIKE 0 PARRY-LUNGE 6 - 9 - 0 40 | |PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 LUNGING ATTACK 44 - 71 - 5 38 | Turn 225 was great if you Not so great if you used The fighting styles of the used the fighting styles: the fighting styles: top eleven warriors are: SLASHING ATTACK 4 - 2 LUNGING ATTACK 3 - 6 2 TOTAL PARRY TOTAL PARRY 2 - 1 BASHING ATTACK 1 - 3 2 BASHING ATTACK WALL OF STEEL 3 - 2 PARRY-LUNGE 0 - 1 2 LUNGING ATTACK AIMED BLOW 4 - 3 PARRY-STRIKE 0 - 0 2 AIMED BLOW STRIKING ATTACK 2 - 2 PARRY-RIPOSTE 0 - 0 1 SLASHING ATTACK 1 STRIKING ATTACK 1 WALL OF STEEL TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE FIGHTING STYLE WARRIOR W L K PNTS TEAM NAME TOTAL PARRY INSOLENT IRIS 3323 27 9 0 152 FLOWER GIRLS (189) BASHING ATTACK IGOR MALMORT 3594 12 8 1 130 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) SLASHING ATTACK SEVERITY 3538 18 11 3 104 ASSASSIN NATION (186) LUNGING ATTACK MAYHEM 3537 17 12 2 94 ASSASSIN NATION (186) STRIKING ATTACK TONNELLE 3634 15 4 1 91 BLOOD AND GUTS! (365) WALL OF STEEL PSYCHOSIS 3651 13 6 3 90 DARK RAIDERS (78) AIMED BLOW BUSHSUCKSTOADIE 3757 8 3 3 90 ISN'T IT OBVIOUS (382) Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above. The overall popularity leader is PANDEMIC 3319. The most popular warrior this turn was PANDEMIC 3319. The ten other most popular fighters were MAYHEM 3537, INSOLENT IRIS 3323, SER LORAS TYRELL 3582, BOB LE CANADIEN 3632, SER STEEL 3579, TONNELLE 3634, ATHLETE'S FOOT 3678, DISHONOR 3843, BOY Z 3739, and IGOR MALMORT 3594. The least popular fighter this week was THEDEONITSKNEES 3854. The other ten least popular fighters were ISHARA 3732, SUE SOON 3572, AYDINDRIL 3704, TEMPEST 3770, SMOTHERING SALVIA 3776, IMTOOSEXY 3759, PAS DE QUARTIER 3633, BRAIN TUMOUR 3502, MALICE 3343, and LETSDAHEATHEN 3855. JANUARY FACE-TO-FACE IN TEMPE! Our next winter FTF will be held in Tempe, Arizona, January 12-14, 2007. It will be held at the Embassy Suites Hotel in Tempe, Arizona (480-894-7444), the same hotel as last year by popular request. Room rates are $149.00 per night, 1-4 occupancy, which includes full cooked breakfast, complimentary manager's reception (yes, really!), free airport shuttle, free parking, high speed internet (for extra charge), fitness center, jacuzzi, and pool. The rooms are blocked--please make your reservation by December 15 before the block is released! (This is prime season for Phoenix, and several people were unable to book rooms last year because they waited too long.) Look for transportation info in the tournament information sheet. We hope you're all looking forward to it and that we will see you there!