DUELMASTERS NEWSLETTER

Date   : 08/29/2003    Duedate: 09/25/2003

TROCAR ARENA

DM-54    TURN-172

This Weeks Top Honors

THE DUELMASTER IS

MICROSOFT
USELESS TOOLS (219)
(54-2483) [10-4-0,121]

Chartered Recognition Leader   Unchartered Recognition Leader

MICROSOFT                      SIR LOIN OF BEEF
USELESS TOOLS (219)            POMPOUS PALADINS (277)
(54-2483) [10-4-0,121]         (54-2618) [3-1-1,33]

Popularity Leader              This Weeks Favorite

CERISA                         ANGLE OF DOOM
TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)        MISSSPELLED (262)
(54-2414) [18-22-1,84]         (54-2489) [2-6-1,16]

THE CURRENT TOP TEAM

INDULGENT DRINKS (256)

          TEAMS ON THE MOVE            TOP CAREER HONORS
Team Name                  Point Gain  Chartered Team
1. INDULGENT DRINKS (256)      46
2. USELESS TOOLS (219)         37      USELESS TOOLS (219)
3. BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)       32      Unchartered Team
4. POMPOUS PALADINS (277)      29
5. RANCID FOODS (284)          29      MIKE'S MORTUARY (285)

The Top Teams

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K
 1/ 0*MIKE'S MORTUARY (285)      1   0  0  100   1/ 1 INDULGENT DRINKS (256)   13  2 1
 2/ 3 USELESS TOOLS (219)      136  71  3 65.7   2/ 2 USELESS TOOLS (219)       9  4 0
 3/ 5 INDULGENT DRINKS (256)    66  38  4 63.5   3/ 5*DREIHDENWALD (279)        9  6 0
 4/ 4 ELDRITCH FURY (268)       48  28  7 63.2   4/ 7*WOLFSPIDER'S GANG (280)   9  6 0
 5- 6 FISH HAMMERZ (271)       180 115 13 61.0   5/ 3 RUNNING AMOK (238)        8  5 0
 6/ 0*RANCID FOODS (284)         3   2  1 60.0   6/ 8*BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)     8  7 0
 7/11*BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)     14  11  0 56.0   7/11*PLAGUES (273)             7  8 0
 8/ 7*DREIHDENWALD (279)        11   9  0 55.0   8/10 ELDRITCH FURY (268)       6  4 2
 9/ 8 RUNNING AMOK (238)        60  53  7 53.1   9/ 4*MISSSPELLED (262)         6  9 1
10/10 TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)  103  96  6 51.8  10- 9 FISH HAMMERZ (271)        5  5 0
11/ 9*WOLFSPIDER'S GANG (280)   10  10  0 50.0  11/ 6 TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)   5  9 0
12/12*MISSSPELLED (262)         16  22  4 42.1  12/12*POMPOUS PALADINS (277)    5 10 2
13/ 0*BAD FEELINGS (283)         2   3  0 40.0  13/ 0*RANCID FOODS (284)        3  2 1
14/13*PLAGUES (273)              9  16  0 36.0  14/15*FUSED SAIYANS (272)       3  3 0
15/16*FUSED SAIYANS (272)        4   9  0 30.8  15/ 0*BAD FEELINGS (283)        2  3 0
16/15*POMPOUS PALADINS (277)     6  14  2 30.0  16/14*KATHOUSE (278)            2  8 0
17/14*KATHOUSE (278)             4  11  0 26.7  17/ 0*MIKE'S MORTUARY (285)     1  0 0
18-17*WULF PACK (281)            1   8  0 11.1  18-17*WULF PACK (281)           1  8 0

Career Win-Loss Record           W   L  K    %  Win-Loss Record Last 3 Turns    W  L K

    '*'   Unchartered team                       '-'  Team did not fight this turn
   (###)  Avoid teams by their Team Id          ##/## This turn's/Last turn's rank

                                    TEAM SPOTLIGHT

          + ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ The Charter Cities #90 ]H[ + ---:--- + ]H[ +

Monuntial:

     Someone shouted for him, them, whoever heard and understood, to drop flat on the
count of five.  It took Agro a few seconds to realize the command had been in Isle
cant, a language born of the cross-fertilization of Fratsfan, Kannish, and Tathanit,
and little known outside the gladiatorial community.  Probably a friend, then.  When
someone yelled "FIVE" he dropped.
     And an explosion of...light?  Fire?  Some kind of blast flashed over his head,
taking down anyone still standing.  The Usurper's guards, the regular guards, most of
his followers who were still standing.  He didn't want to think about Bindi; she was
still a Basic gladiator and hadn't been exposed to Isle cant....
     There was a second explosion on the heels of the first, but it was dark and cold
and expanded in a volume instead of a plane.  Counterattack?  This was a lot of magic
flying around for the time and conditions.  Agro recalled that someone had told him
Nishtar, the Eastern ally of the Usurper, was a mage.  Maybe a reckless mage, then.
And it probably meant that the Usurper, or at least his ally, had survived the first
blast.
     When the air stopped shaking, Agro raised his head and looked around cautiously.
He couldn't hear anything, but that was probably because the two blasts had numbed
his ears.  After a look at the stands, he decided temporary deafness was a blessing.
He gathered his limbs under himself and lurched to his feet.  A few others down on
the sands were doing likewise--one of them, he saw with relief, was Bindi.  If any
were guards, they'd lost their tell-tale armor.  He gestured for her to go toward the
exit and started in that direction himself.
     He had about a dozen men left of the bunch he'd started with, which meant a lot
of them were dead or down.  And that was still fewer dead than if he'd left them to
the Usurper's lions.  But what to do with them now?  Whatever life they'd had here in
Monuntial before today, they couldn't go back to it.  They were marked men now,
rebels, and Nishtar and Quelsarrain had a short way with rebels.  Probably the ones
fed to the lions were the lucky ones.  Worry about that later.
     Worry about it?  What was happening in his head?  Since when did he worry about
humans?  Humans were meat at best, mortal enemies more often.  Worry about THAT
later, too.
     Agro burst out of the arena's gate with Bindi at his side and the handful of
rebels at his heels.  There were Usurper's men in the street, but they seemed
disorganized.  Probably shaken and confused by the explosions, who wouldn't be?  It
was tempting, it would have been easy to cut down four or five of the nearest ones
before they realized there was a fight going on, but he resisted.  A fight would
shake them out of their confusion faster than anything, and as long as they were
milling uselessly asking each other what was going on, he had an edge.  He needed to
use it to get himself, Bindi, and these men who trusted him out of town.
     He picked the street with the fewest soldiers on it and set off at a run.

Between Morya and Rocanis:

     Rokori Klee had chosen their route well, and they got clear of the volcanic area
without meeting any miners.  Or anything else.  Except for the disgruntled miners
they had left behind, staring at the river of lava which had been their mining
claims, they met nothing alive.
     Or anything dead, Iron Talon noted silently.  This bizarre landscape of burning
rocks and smoky air would be just the place for meeting some kind of undead
THING...like that one!  Something that might be a skeleton wavered in the near
distance, gleaming white as bone.
     "Don't think!" Bill said sharply.  "The coruscine may have left a magical
residue that will take months to disperse, and a careless thought could bring
disaster on us in an instant."  When the white-shining thing came closer, proving to
be an animated skeleton such as Iron Talon had imagined, he said sharply, "There are
no animated skeletons here!  There are no creatures of undeath!"
     The skeleton collapsed in a clatter of bones, then crumbled to dust.
     "Oh...."  Iron Talon looked down at what remained of her accidental creation.
"If I were to imagine..." she squinted into the smoky clouds, "someone who might be
dead, for instance, if I were to really BELIEVE that I saw Lugard coming out of that
fold of the hills over there...."
     "Don't!" Bill yelped.
     It was too late.  Someone was coming out of the crease in the hills, and it
looked very much like Lugard.
     "Why not?" Iron Talon asked, grinning.  "If it works...."
     "What if he didn't die, and now there are two of him?" Rokori Klee asked.
     "And even if there's only the one, made by chance and magic and desire," Bill
said grimly, "it isn't what you think.  Not the same person you remember, and not
anyone you want to know."
     "You're just an old wet blanket," Iron Talon snapped.  "I don't believe you, and
I won't listen."  She turned her horse and spurred it toward the approaching figure.
     Bill and Rokori started after her.
     "It might actually be Lugard," Rokori offered after a moment.  "We don't KNOW
that he died."
     "And pigs might fly, too," the young magician said bitterly.  "If either of us
had a bow, I'd say shoot it now, before it can do anything."
     "Sounds extreme," the Dark Arena Shew said.  "Does being a golem mean it has to
be bad?"
     "Under the circumstances, yes, it does.  The circumstances here couldn't produce
anything BUT a malign creature."  He glanced at his big companion.  "I'm not just
saying that, but the situation is too complex for easy explanations.  Just...if that
is a magical construct, it's an enemy."
     "You won't convince Iron Talon of that," Rokori Klee said.  "She sees what she
wants to see."
     "Karn and Demnat!" Bill growled.  "It's no wonder the Governors of the Academy
advise against contact with women.  They're impossible, unreasonable,
unpredictable--"
     "No worse than men," the Shew answered.  "It's just part of being alive."  He
was standing in his stirrups, and since he was a very tall man on a very tall horse,
he could see a long ways.  But the drifting clouds of smoke and steam from the
eruption masked large parts of the landscape, and now Iron Talon and the Lugard-image
were both out of sight.  "They might have gone into that little valley yonder," he
muttered anxiously.
     "This is an unstable area," Bill said.  "They might have fallen through an
accidental Gate, too."

                                 DUELMASTER'S COLUMN
                             Notes from the arena champ.

     I have beaten both Traders (not to be confused with Traitors) of Trocar, leaving
only Slippery Nipple as the Challenger Champion of choice.  Of course, I am
Microsoft, and I don't believe in spreading the wealth, so I will monopolize the
throne and challenge Joey Abeq, to see if he's really as slow as he demonstrated last
time.  Slippers gets the alternate challenge.

Microsoft
Useless Tool

                                      SPY REPORT

     Thankyouthankyou.  It's great for me, The Unknown Spymaster to be back in 
TROCAR.  Hope you enjoy the show.  Oh, who am I kidding?  I already got paid!  It was 
a tough week for MISSSPELLED, to drop 5 places in the rankings.  Coming up with a 
solid 3-2-0 outing, PLAGUES has advanced 4 places in the rankings.  BUTZBERG 'CROSS 
is no joke as it posted a 4-1-0 week advancing from 8th place to 6th place.  RANCID 
FOODS:  Not great, but not bad.  Keep up the work and look forward to having better 
success as your warriors become more seasoned.  Hey everybody, watch out for MINA, 
who flew up 16 points in the rankings after mashing ALUM like a melon.  Keep your eye 
on this gal.  Ya know, some days it doesn't pay to walk out on the sands.  ALUM lost 
to MINA and drops 12 points.  Well here's a duelmaster that doesn't sit back and say 
'Challenge me'!  MICROSOFT made a challenge against JOEY ABEQ this week.  Going for 
the gusto and coming up with aught but bloody knuckles was TRADERS OF TROCAR's JOEY 
ABEQ, who was turned away from the Duelmastership by MICROSOFT.  Advice to 
bashers--never force anything, just get a bigger halberd!   
     But enough of that bunch, let's get on to the wimps who like to avoid battle!  
Did you hear that RUNNING AMOK was most avoided team this week?  Well, knowing the 
personal hygiene of RUNNING AMOK's warriors, I'm not surprised!  Okay, so I may not 
be funny, but catch USELESS TOOLS' act in the arena.  Those acrobats seem to be 
fairly deft at running from RUNNING AMOK.  Well just about everybody wants a piece of 
GASTOLPHO, who was this week's most challenged warrior.  In a touching display by a 
'touched' warrior, NO-STICK TAPE went after NIGHTSONG, who was higher by 24 points.  
Well, when the dust settled, NO-STICK TAPE was overcame by NIGHTSONG.   
     Remember that an arena is not always a safe place to be, but it is one of the 
most interesting, though!  WEE JAS defied all odds and slew LONG TALL LEMUEL in the 
Dark Arena.  The only ones displeased were the buzzards, as LONG TALL LEMUEL's meat 
is notoriously tough.  Knowing when to use the right tactics at the proper time is a 
very important step on the road to Duelmaster.   
     Well, that wasn't too bad; Alarond told me that the people in TROCAR have no 
sense of humor.  Or maybe that they were senseless.  Okay, so I may not be the 
world's best comedian, but then you guys aren't the world's best warriors.  Its been 
fun, and I'm sure you enjoyed it (boos).  Now that I've got you worked up for Snide 
Clemens, I'll be leaving-- The Unknown Spymaster  

DUELMASTER                     W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MICROSOFT 2483               10   4  0   121       USELESS TOOLS (219)

CHALLENGER CHAMPIONS           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SLIPPERY NIPPLE 2478         12   9  1   103       INDULGENT DRINKS (256)

CHAMPIONS                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 JOEY ABEQ 2453               18  13  1    87       TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)
 CERISA 2414                  18  22  1    84       TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)
 RAVEN CLAW 2461               9   7  1    81       RUNNING AMOK (238)
 RUBBER BULLET 2503           10   1  0    79       USELESS TOOLS (219)
 WEE JAS 2548                 10   5  3    74       ELDRITCH FURY (268)

CHALLENGER ADEPTS              W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 MS. S.C.U.M. 2544            11   3  0    63       ELDRITCH FURY (268)
 NIGHTSONG 2546               11   4  0    61       ELDRITCH FURY (268)
 GRUUMSH 2545                  8   7  1    61       ELDRITCH FURY (268)

ADEPTS                         W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
-SEAHORSE HAMMER 2580         10   8  0    55       FISH HAMMERZ (271)
 A.O. HELL 2523                6   2  0    54       USELESS TOOLS (219)
-IRON TALON 2460              12  12  0    52       RUNNING AMOK (238)
 SILVERBOLT 2554               5   3  0    41       RUNNING AMOK (238)
 MOUSETRAP 2521                6   3  1    40       USELESS TOOLS (219)
 NO-STICK TAPE 2541            5   2  0    38       USELESS TOOLS (219)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SIR LOIN OF BEEF 2618         3   1  1    33       POMPOUS PALADINS (277)
-FIREFLASH 2459                6   6  2    32       RUNNING AMOK (238)
 THUNDERBIRD 2555              4   2  0    31       INDULGENT DRINKS (256)
 SLOW GIN FIZZ 2556            4   0  0    29       INDULGENT DRINKS (256)
 IN-LAWS 2593                  3   2  0    27       PLAGUES (273)

CHALLENGER INITIATES           W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 SIR CASWALLAWN 2617           1   3  1    27       POMPOUS PALADINS (277)
 URS BOLLINGER 2609            4   1  0    26       BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)
 BALZ WEBER 2611               3   2  0    26       BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)
 GALLOWS DWARF 2631            2   2  0    26       WOLFSPIDER'S GANG (280)
 CASS 2629                     4   0  0    25       DREIHDENWALD (279)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 FIREBOLT 2603                 4   1  0    22       RUNNING AMOK (238)
 LUR 2632                      3   1  0    22       WOLFSPIDER'S GANG (280)
-DORSAL FIN HAMMER 2584        1   2  0    22       FISH HAMMERZ (271)
 RED EYE 2542                  5   4  0    21       INDULGENT DRINKS (256)
 LAWYER 2595                   2   3  0    21       PLAGUES (273)
 LORD HALIFAX 2625             4   0  0    19       DREIHDENWALD (279)
 WHITE RUSSIAN 2652            2   0  0    19       INDULGENT DRINKS (256)
-RIVER SQUID HAMMER 2585       1   2  0    19       FISH HAMMERZ (271)
 TWO 2492                      4   4  2    18       MISSSPELLED (262)
 DUALMASTER 2515               4   1  0    18       MISSSPELLED (262)
 GOTAN 2588                    3   1  0    18       FUSED SAIYANS (272)
 HAVELOCK THE DANE 2614        2   2  0    18       POMPOUS PALADINS (277)
 ANGLE OF DOOM 2489            2   6  1    16       MISSSPELLED (262)
 YVES CORMINBEUF 2654          1   1  0    16       BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)
 MINA 2656                     1   0  0    16       ELDRITCH FURY (268)
 MARK SCHUPPLI 2653            1   1  0    15       BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)
 DAROSHTAN 2602                4   2  0    14       TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)
 OLD MONKEY JUTE 2634          2   2  0    14       WOLFSPIDER'S GANG (280)
 FIREANT 2592                  2   3  0    14       PLAGUES (273)
-FLOUNDER HAMMER 2586          2   1  0    13       FISH HAMMERZ (271)
 AYEBALL 2668                  1   0  0    13       MISSSPELLED (262)
 FLAPPIN 2661                  1   0  0    13       BAD FEELINGS (283)
-JELLYFISH HAMMER 2566         1   2  0    12       FISH HAMMERZ (271)
 WARLEGGAN 2630                1   3  0    12       WOLFSPIDER'S GANG (280)
 SUM-TING RONG 2669            1   0  0    12       MIKE'S MORTUARY (285)
 SVEN DUMUSC 2612              3   2  0    11       BUTZBERG 'CROSS (276)
 CHUCK-E-SNEEZE 2667           1   0  1    11       RANCID FOODS (284)
 LOCUST 2594                   1   4  0    11       PLAGUES (273)
 TALION 2626                   1   3  0    10       DREIHDENWALD (279)
 SAIL PHONE 2539               1   3  0    10       MISSSPELLED (262)
 CRAMPS 2657                   1   0  0    10       BAD FEELINGS (283)
 HACK IN THE BOX 2665          1   0  0    10       RANCID FOODS (284)
 MOCHAOMHOG 2616               0   4  0    10       POMPOUS PALADINS (277)
 KATRINE 2622                  1   2  0     9       KATHOUSE (278)
 ALUM 2627                     2   2  0     8       DREIHDENWALD (279)
 WIMPLES 2640                  2   2  0     8       TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)
 KAT CHI 2620                  2   1  0     7       KATHOUSE (278)
 KILLER BEE 2596               1   4  0     7       PLAGUES (273)
-PORUNGA 2649                  1   0  0     7       FUSED SAIYANS (272)
 KAT CHING 2623                1   2  0     6       KATHOUSE (278)
 BREAK WENDY'S 2664            1   0  0     6       RANCID FOODS (284)
 WIMPERETTA 2655               1   0  0     6       TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)
 FINNIGAN 2615                 0   4  0     5       POMPOUS PALADINS (277)
-THORNE 2637                   1   1  0     4       WULF PACK (281)
 UMIS 2628                     0   4  0     4       DREIHDENWALD (279)
 KATZEN JAMMER 2624            0   3  0     3       KATHOUSE (278)
-LOKI 2636                     0   2  0     2       WULF PACK (281)
-SPIKE 2639                    0   2  0     2       WULF PACK (281)
-RAVN 2638                     0   2  0     2       WULF PACK (281)
-VEGETUNKS 2648                0   1  0     1       FUSED SAIYANS (272)
-BARGETTO 2650                 0   1  0     1       FUSED SAIYANS (272)
 PAPER CUT 2660                0   1  0     1       BAD FEELINGS (283)
 KATFISH 2662                  0   1  0     1       KATHOUSE (278)
 WET 2658                      0   1  0     1       BAD FEELINGS (283)
-TINY 2635                     0   1  0     1       WULF PACK (281)
 TACO SMELL 2663               0   1  0     1       RANCID FOODS (284)

INITIATES                      W   L  K POINTS      TEAM NAME                  
 LITTLE SEIZURES 2666          0   1  0     1       RANCID FOODS (284)

'-' denotes a warrior who did not fight this turn.

THE DEAD               W  L K TEAM NAME             SLAIN BY             TURN Revenge?
TWISTED 2659           0  1 0 BAD FEELINGS 283      CHUCK-E-SNEEZE 2667   172         
FLUKIGER 2610          1  1 0 BUTZBERG 'CROSS 276   ANGLE OF DOOM 2489    169 REVENGED
RETO GUT 2613          1  2 0 BUTZBERG 'CROSS 276   TWO 2492              170 JUST REV
LONG TALL LEMUEL 21    0  1 0 DARK ARENA 0          WEE JAS 2548          172 NONE    
GASTOLPHO 2633         2  2 0 WOLFSPIDER'S GANG 280 SIR LOIN OF BEEF 2618 172         

                                     PERSONAL ADS

Nightsong -- Did you get a backbone with that challenge? -- Mousetrap

In-Laws -- Is that all I can expect from this so-called alliancefest. -- No-Stick
Tape

All -- Look like "The Gang" is on fire with 4-1.  Makes up for the first turn 1-4
anyway. -- Jack Wolfspider

Microsoft -- That's a damned virulent virus you attacked me with. -- Cerisa
P.S.  I blame YOU for the death of my laptop.

Gruumsh -- You know, Wimpia was right about your name.  Have you given any thought to
what you would RATHER be called? -- Joey Abeq

Firebolt -- (crossly)  Well, I suppose I needed the loss for luck, but so do you! --
Daroshtan

Mark Schuppli -- Take that, you infant! -- Wimples
P.S.  I should be female.  Why am I male?

Gruumsh -- THERE you are!  You concentrated splendidly and made a perfect beacon for
me.  I rather thought I was reincarnating, but that (deleted) Wimples slipped in
ahead of me.  Still, I think I have a line on another appearance.  We must do
something really eldritch to make our mark on the arena! -- Ghost of Wimpia

Shadowmere -- I'm there, but look for Dodge Bullets managed by Uncle Wolf.  That is
my cognomen in the Charter Cities area. -- Jinda/Jorja/Uncle Wolf, and other names
too numerous to mention

1 August 2003
     Assurnasirbanipal invites you to Talcama to participate in the third BATTLE
ROYAL contest.  It is a Delarquan contest so brutal that even some of Talcama's most
notable managers will refuse to participate.  The rules are simpler than any other
contest:  You may not avoid any other contest team.  There are no silly rules for who
can and can't compete.  Any team in Talcama is eligible to compete.  The scoring is
also quite simple (+1 for a win, +1 for a kill (+1 for the win), -1 for a loss) and
the first team to reach 25 points is the winner.
     Scoring will be live--the results for the turn posted in the newsletter.  The
winner will be able to fight their contest team in Talcama for free for 6 months but
more importantly will win a contest against some of the best managers who play the
game in one of the hardest contests in the game.
     First turn for BATTLE ROYAL 3 is Talcama Turn 465, which is due August 30.

19 August 2003
     Citizens of Ghea (only the ignorant fail to note Lirith Kai is not in Alastari),
no new day is rising, but the sun is setting on just another beautiful evening.
While you were sleeping, an irksome rabble has entered the always fair Aruak City.
Of course they fought alongside our warriors, most not so treasured, as all
gladiators do.  They drank with themselves, and slept with themselves.  Whether they
had masks, who cares.
     Warriors, don't be afraid.  For years Aruak has been one of the safest cities in
Ghea, and that custom has been continually cultivated, and will continue to be by
those who have called it home for years and those who live, fight, and die by the
same ethics.  There is no contest, nor has there ever needed to be one for many
years.  A conflict of personalities has arisen, and the city has been 'invaded' by
pests.
     Any rules that are annouced will be purely for the joy of the lemmings' own
little world.  Those who are being targeted have no interest in participating except
to defend the integrity of an arena that is different from others.  Whether you
choose to come to Aruak, do it for your own reasons, not theirs.
    Competing in Aruak City has never been for the faint of heart or the weak willed.
Combat is combat, wherever you go.  Blood will flow as always, and now many innocents
will be caught in the middle, but those who defend Aruak's traditions never target
those who bring respect of Aruaki customs with them to our home.
    So ignore the private ranting announcement brought by the stuporous
Frothingsloshers.  If you choose Aruak City, do not choose it for an unsanctioned and
bogus 'contest', choose it for the tradition.  Choose it because Aruak is different.

Defenders of Aruak

25 August 2003
To any that care -- The CDC is back; our current roster is:
     Malaquar -- Minion of Guardian
     Pip the Troll -- Burly Enforcer Type
     mouse -- Official Sneaky Bastard
     Papa Bear -- Elder Statesmen
                     The Sealer says, "Hi, I'm the dealer."
                     Papa Bear says, "It's not my f****n fault."
Guardian -- Paper Figurehead

                                  LAST WEEK'S FIGHTS

WEE JAS viciously butchered LONG TALL LEMUEL in a 2 minute Dark Arena fight.
MARK SCHUPPLI subdued TWO in a 1 minute Bloodfeud melee.
MICROSOFT demolished JOEY ABEQ in a 1 minute uneven Challenge Title fight.
RUBBER BULLET bested MS. S.C.U.M. in a 6 minute Challenge contest.
A.O. HELL defeated SILVERBOLT in a 2 minute Challenge fight.
NO-STICK TAPE was subdued by NIGHTSONG in a 1 minute Challenge competition.
GALLOWS DWARF devastated LOCUST in a 1 minute one-sided Challenge duel.
IN-LAWS devastated DAROSHTAN in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
THUNDERBIRD unbelievably bested FIREBOLT in a action packed 2 minute Challenge fight.
LAWYER viciously subdued OLD MONKEY JUTE in a action packed 4 minute Challenge duel.
LUR unbelievably bested ANGLE OF DOOM in a popular 6 minute Challenge duel.
YVES CORMINBEUF overpowered WARLEGGAN in a 1 minute uneven Challenge match.
KATZEN JAMMER was beaten by RED EYE in a 1 minute Challenge fight.
WHITE RUSSIAN demolished KILLER BEE in a 1 minute mismatched Challenge match.
KAT CHING was outwaited by URS BOLLINGER in a monotonous 8 minute Challenge contest.
KATRINE was subdued by FIREANT in a 2 minute Challenge brawl.
FINNIGAN was beaten by CASS in a 3 minute Challenge conflict.
SIR LOIN OF BEEF easily killed GASTOLPHO in a popular 1 minute uneven Challenge fight.
SLIPPERY NIPPLE vanquished CERISA in a 1 minute one-sided fray.
RAVEN CLAW devastated GRUUMSH in a 1 minute mismatched brawl.
MOUSETRAP outlasted SIR CASWALLAWN in a exciting 8 minute veteran vs. novice bout.
BALZ WEBER beat TALION in a crowd pleasing 1 minute fight.
DUALMASTER was bested by SLOW GIN FIZZ in a 6 minute contest.
GOTAN savagely defeated MOCHAOMHOG in a 2 minute gruesome fight.
SAIL PHONE was demolished by HAVELOCK THE DANE in a 1 minute uneven bout.
LORD HALIFAX outwaited WIMPLES in a tiring 12 minute brutal contest.
UMIS was overpowered by SUM-TING RONG in a 4 minute uneven fight.
ALUM was beaten by MINA in a 1 minute beginner's fight.
KAT CHI outlasted LITTLE SEIZURES in a dull 14 minute novice's bout.
SVEN DUMUSC was savagely defeated by AYEBALL in a 3 minute gory beginner's duel.
WIMPERETTA overcame KATFISH in a action packed 1 minute amateur's bout.
CRAMPS overpowered TACO SMELL in a 1 minute one-sided fight.
WET was vanquished by HACK IN THE BOX in a 1 minute brutal one-sided fray.
TWISTED was murdered by CHUCK-E-SNEEZE in a 1 minute brutal one-sided fight.
PAPER CUT was narrowly defeated by BREAK WENDY'S in a 3 minute brutal beginner's bout.
FLAPPIN devastated TROCARAN DESERTER in a 1 minute one-sided duel.

                                    BATTLE REPORT

             MOST POPULAR                        RECORD DURING THE LAST 10 TURNS     
|FIGHTING STYLE               FIGHTS        FIGHTING STYLE     W -   L -  K   PERCENT|
|STRIKING ATTACK                 15         PARRY-LUNGE        9 -   4 -  0      69  |
|TOTAL PARRY                     11         TOTAL PARRY       33 -  17 -  0      66  |
|LUNGING ATTACK                   9         PARRY-RIPOSTE     13 -   7 -  0      65  |
|BASHING ATTACK                   8         PARRY-STRIKE      17 -  13 -  2      57  |
|SLASHING ATTACK                  8         WALL OF STEEL     17 -  14 -  2      55  |
|AIMED BLOW                       5         LUNGING ATTACK    21 -  20 -  4      51  |
|PARRY-STRIKE                     5         STRIKING ATTACK   44 -  45 -  3      49  |
|WALL OF STEEL                    5         AIMED BLOW        19 -  20 -  3      49  |
|PARRY-RIPOSTE                    3         BASHING ATTACK    20 -  24 -  2      45  |
|PARRY-LUNGE                      1         SLASHING ATTACK   12 -  27 -  3      31  |

Turn 172 was great if you     Not so great if you used      The fighting styles of the
used the fighting styles:     the fighting styles:          top eleven warriors are:

PARRY-LUNGE        1 -  0     SLASHING ATTACK    3 -  5         2  PARRY-STRIKE   
AIMED BLOW         4 -  1     STRIKING ATTACK    5 - 10         2  WALL OF STEEL  
TOTAL PARRY        8 -  3     WALL OF STEEL      1 -  4         2  BASHING ATTACK 
PARRY-RIPOSTE      2 -  1                                       1  STRIKING ATTACK
PARRY-STRIKE       3 -  2                                       1  LUNGING ATTACK 
LUNGING ATTACK     5 -  4                                       1  TOTAL PARRY    
BASHING ATTACK     4 -  4                                       1  AIMED BLOW     
                                                                1  SLASHING ATTACK

                               TOP WARRIOR OF EACH STYLE

FIGHTING STYLE   WARRIOR                     W   L  K PNTS TEAM NAME                  
STRIKING ATTACK  MICROSOFT 2483             10   4  0  121 USELESS TOOLS (219)
PARRY-STRIKE     SLIPPERY NIPPLE 2478       12   9  1  103 INDULGENT DRINKS (256)
BASHING ATTACK   RAVEN CLAW 2461             9   7  1   81 RUNNING AMOK (238)
WALL OF STEEL    RUBBER BULLET 2503         10   1  0   79 USELESS TOOLS (219)
LUNGING ATTACK   WEE JAS 2548               10   5  3   74 ELDRITCH FURY (268)
TOTAL PARRY      MS. S.C.U.M. 2544          11   3  0   63 ELDRITCH FURY (268)
AIMED BLOW       NIGHTSONG 2546             11   4  0   61 ELDRITCH FURY (268)
SLASHING ATTACK  GRUUMSH 2545                8   7  1   61 ELDRITCH FURY (268)
PARRY-LUNGE      A.O. HELL 2523              6   2  0   54 USELESS TOOLS (219)
Note: Warriors have a winning record and are an Adept or Above.

The overall popularity leader is CERISA 2414.  The most popular warrior this turn was 
ANGLE OF DOOM 2489.  The ten other most popular fighters were SIR CASWALLAWN 2617, 
FIREBOLT 2603, WEE JAS 2548, LAWYER 2595, RUBBER BULLET 2503, A.O. HELL 2523, SIR 
LOIN OF BEEF 2618, GOTAN 2588, AYEBALL 2668, and BREAK WENDY'S 2664.

The least popular fighter this week was KAT CHI 2620.  The other ten least popular 
fighters were WIMPLES 2640, LORD HALIFAX 2625, URS BOLLINGER 2609, LITTLE SEIZURES 
2666, MOUSETRAP 2521, MS. S.C.U.M. 2544, WET 2658, TACO SMELL 2663, SVEN DUMUSC 2612, 
and ALUM 2627.

The following warriors will travel to ADVANCED DUELMASTERS after next turn:

JOEY ABEQ (54-2453) TRADERS OF TROCAR (252)

                                FACE-TO-FACE XXXII

     Our next Winter Face-to-Face will be held on Martin Luther King weekend, Friday 
through Sunday, 16-18 January 2004, at the Embassy Suites in Tempe, Arizona (4400 S 
Rural Rd).  Room rates are $119.00 per night, 1-2 occupancy, which includes breakfast.  
The rooms are blocked.  The reservations number is 480-897-7444; tell them you're with 
the "Reality Simulations Face to Face Convention" block.  Our room block will be 
released in mid-December, so please make sure you reserve your room before then.
     There is a free shuttle to the airport, as well as free parking.  The hotel is 
located down the freeway in Tempe.  All rooms have high speed internet (for an extra 
charge).  There is a fitness center, jacuzzi, and pool, and of course a bar and 
restaurant inside the hotel.  And there's Denny's right across the street.  Look for 
transportation info in the tournament information sheet.
     The tournament information sheet/strategy sheet should be out sometime in late 
November/early December. 
     If you haven't been to a Face-to-Face before, you're overdue.  If you have, 
you'll be back.  Don't miss this one, it'll be a blast!  See you there! 

                                          -- Green Eyes and the RSI Staff